|
Lost Boys The Thirst
|
| 00:01:06 |
As soon as you feed, Senator, |
| 00:01:22 |
Holy shit! |
| 00:01:25 |
It's the attack of Grandpa Munster! |
| 00:01:33 |
Gross. |
| 00:01:36 |
Damn it. |
| 00:01:38 |
Sorry to ruin your party, Senator. |
| 00:01:41 |
Don't worry, |
| 00:01:44 |
- Thank you. |
| 00:01:46 |
Alan? Alan! |
| 00:01:52 |
Alan! |
| 00:02:01 |
Alan. |
| 00:02:03 |
Alan. Alan, are you okay? |
| 00:02:08 |
No. No, Alan, no. No, Alan! |
| 00:02:11 |
Alan! |
| 00:02:16 |
I am a vampire. |
| 00:02:18 |
Oh, yeah? |
| 00:02:23 |
Hocus pocus. |
| 00:02:30 |
Mr. Frog? |
| 00:02:34 |
Yeah? |
| 00:02:35 |
Were you sleeping? |
| 00:02:38 |
I work nights. |
| 00:02:39 |
- Apparently not hard enough. |
| 00:02:42 |
You're in default on your loans... |
| 00:02:44 |
...and the bank is repossessing |
| 00:02:47 |
This would include any... |
| 00:02:49 |
...structure currently |
| 00:02:52 |
- Are you serious? |
| 00:02:57 |
Have a good day. |
| 00:03:01 |
Fucking vampires. |
| 00:05:29 |
- Cash or store credit? |
| 00:05:33 |
Comes to 65 even. |
| 00:05:36 |
Sixty-five dollars? |
| 00:05:38 |
Are you kidding me? I mean, this issue |
| 00:05:42 |
...in nearly mint condition |
| 00:05:45 |
In near-mint condition. |
| 00:05:47 |
I know near-mint condition |
| 00:05:51 |
What are you talking about? |
| 00:05:54 |
It's been boarded and bagged |
| 00:05:57 |
Well, let's have a look. |
| 00:06:00 |
There are stress marks |
| 00:06:03 |
The, uh, cover has lost at least 15 percent |
| 00:06:07 |
...the pages are yellow... |
| 00:06:09 |
...and there's significant |
| 00:06:11 |
Hmm. |
| 00:06:13 |
Now, if you were willing to part |
| 00:06:16 |
...I, uh, might be able |
| 00:06:19 |
That's not gonna happen. |
| 00:06:20 |
Happens to have |
| 00:06:23 |
That's my offer, Frog. |
| 00:06:25 |
Take it or leave it. |
| 00:06:29 |
All right, pay me. |
| 00:06:34 |
Have a nice day. |
| 00:06:36 |
I hate happy people. |
| 00:06:39 |
- Hmm. |
| 00:06:42 |
Did you make any money off of Frank? |
| 00:06:44 |
Are you kidding? |
| 00:06:48 |
Ugh. He's such a cheapskate. |
| 00:06:50 |
Here, let me see. |
| 00:06:54 |
Uh, not that one. |
| 00:06:57 |
But there's still some good stuff in here. |
| 00:07:00 |
You want me to put it up on eBay, |
| 00:07:03 |
Uh, sure, why not. |
| 00:07:06 |
Every little bit helps right now. |
| 00:07:09 |
Where do I find the graphic novels? |
| 00:07:11 |
You mean comic books. |
| 00:07:12 |
No, I mean graphic novels. |
| 00:07:16 |
I don't read comic books. I'm not a geek. |
| 00:07:18 |
Oh, well, I can't help you then. |
| 00:07:21 |
Here at the Book O'Neer, geek is chic. |
| 00:07:24 |
- Try Barnes & Noble. |
| 00:07:26 |
I guess you don't want me |
| 00:07:32 |
That guy gets on my last nerve. |
| 00:07:35 |
- You know him? |
| 00:07:38 |
His name is Jonny Trash. |
| 00:07:40 |
He's a celebrity blogger. |
| 00:07:42 |
What the hell is he doing here |
| 00:07:44 |
- They're here for the X-Party. |
| 00:07:47 |
- What's that? |
| 00:07:50 |
And it's gonna be here? |
| 00:07:51 |
If you believe the rumors. |
| 00:07:53 |
But they're not telling anyone where |
| 00:07:57 |
Great. |
| 00:07:58 |
Sounds like the final nail in my coffin. |
| 00:08:05 |
What...? |
| 00:08:09 |
Bye. |
| 00:08:22 |
Oh, shit! |
| 00:08:30 |
Who the hell parked...? |
| 00:08:31 |
My truck. |
| 00:08:33 |
You sure don't look like a cold-blooded, |
| 00:08:37 |
Excuse me? |
| 00:08:39 |
You're Edgar Frog. |
| 00:08:41 |
Sworn enemy to nightcrawlers |
| 00:08:46 |
I'm sorry, lady. |
| 00:08:48 |
You must have me confused |
| 00:08:51 |
I'm Gwen. Gwen Lieber. |
| 00:08:56 |
- Hi. |
| 00:08:59 |
You are the same Edgar Frog |
| 00:09:02 |
...in Santa Carla, Luna Bay |
| 00:09:10 |
I have no idea what you're talking about. |
| 00:09:14 |
Can we go inside to talk? |
| 00:09:19 |
You got two minutes. |
| 00:09:24 |
It's my brother, Peter. |
| 00:09:26 |
He's been kidnapped. |
| 00:09:30 |
A couple of years ago, |
| 00:09:32 |
He was hanging out |
| 00:09:35 |
Hmm. |
| 00:09:36 |
And three weeks ago, |
| 00:09:42 |
...and he disappeared. |
| 00:09:58 |
He started following around |
| 00:10:03 |
He throws these events called X-Parties. |
| 00:10:07 |
Yeah, I've heard of him. |
| 00:10:16 |
Hi. |
| 00:10:18 |
The same people |
| 00:10:21 |
...are throwing similar parties |
| 00:10:24 |
And at these raves, |
| 00:10:29 |
It's called the Thirst. |
| 00:10:33 |
- It comes in little ampoules like this one. |
| 00:10:36 |
...a bunch of drug addicts |
| 00:10:39 |
Because the Thirst is not a drug. |
| 00:10:46 |
It's vampire blood. |
| 00:11:22 |
Nobody has seen him since. |
| 00:11:25 |
Edgar, they are using these raves |
| 00:11:29 |
They're creating |
| 00:11:32 |
They've already infected hundreds |
| 00:11:35 |
Done the same in Thailand, Rio |
| 00:11:38 |
And now the rumors say |
| 00:11:45 |
I'm not interested. |
| 00:11:47 |
Look, I would obviously pay you |
| 00:11:50 |
And this could well be the last time that |
| 00:11:54 |
All of my research suggests... |
| 00:11:56 |
...that the Thirst is made from the blood |
| 00:12:00 |
- The head vampire. |
| 00:12:03 |
- The alpha. |
| 00:12:05 |
...meaning the first. |
| 00:12:08 |
The original. |
| 00:12:10 |
I knew that. |
| 00:12:16 |
I'm still not interested. |
| 00:12:21 |
And your two minutes are up. |
| 00:12:26 |
I'm staying at the Hotel Cazador. |
| 00:12:32 |
I truly hope that you'll reconsider. |
| 00:12:37 |
I know you couldn't save your brother... |
| 00:12:40 |
...but, Edgar, |
| 00:12:49 |
Hmph. |
| 00:13:05 |
Go and check on our guest, would you? |
| 00:13:20 |
Hi, handsome. |
| 00:13:23 |
Hmm. Poor little thing. |
| 00:13:27 |
Just try to relax. |
| 00:13:30 |
This will all be over soon. |
| 00:13:43 |
Why would anyone |
| 00:13:48 |
Because it's so fucking fun! |
| 00:13:58 |
You make sure our package arrives |
| 00:14:01 |
And send someone to take care of Frog. |
| 00:14:52 |
DJ X... |
| 00:14:54 |
...the man behind the machine. I've been |
| 00:14:58 |
...on my website, |
| 00:15:01 |
You know how many media impressions |
| 00:15:03 |
Don't put your hands on me, man. |
| 00:15:06 |
That's our head of security, Kirk O'Dale. |
| 00:15:10 |
There... |
| 00:15:12 |
...now you know him. |
| 00:15:16 |
Well, just wait a minute. |
| 00:15:19 |
...then I swear I'll make it |
| 00:15:22 |
...to make sure that no one goes |
| 00:15:27 |
Well, we wouldn't want that. |
| 00:15:31 |
After all... |
| 00:15:33 |
...ever is a long time. |
| 00:15:36 |
Step into my office. |
| 00:16:11 |
I've got the blues |
| 00:16:14 |
I've got the blues |
| 00:16:18 |
I ain't got nothing but the blues |
| 00:16:22 |
I ain't got nothing but the blues |
| 00:16:25 |
Why did you go? |
| 00:16:27 |
Ugh. Creepy. |
| 00:16:29 |
Why did you go |
| 00:16:33 |
And leave me here with the blues? |
| 00:16:36 |
And leave me here with the blues? |
| 00:16:40 |
You left me sad and you left me sore |
| 00:16:43 |
You left me with the lowdown blues |
| 00:16:47 |
Hello, Edgar. |
| 00:16:49 |
What brings you all the way down here? |
| 00:16:52 |
Now I have to have an excuse |
| 00:16:54 |
At 1 in the morning, yeah. |
| 00:16:57 |
I figured you'd be up. |
| 00:16:59 |
I've recently learned |
| 00:17:02 |
...who's created a new designer drug |
| 00:17:06 |
The only problem is it's not a drug... |
| 00:17:09 |
...it's vampire blood. |
| 00:17:11 |
He's breeding an undead army... |
| 00:17:14 |
...and the only thing that stands |
| 00:17:18 |
...and the annihilation... |
| 00:17:20 |
...of the entire human race... |
| 00:17:23 |
...potentially... |
| 00:17:25 |
...would be us. |
| 00:17:28 |
The Frog Brothers. |
| 00:17:31 |
We haven't been the Frog Brothers |
| 00:17:36 |
I just... |
| 00:17:38 |
- I can't do it without you. |
| 00:17:41 |
Sam's gone. |
| 00:17:42 |
He turned, |
| 00:17:47 |
I guess that cancels out |
| 00:17:50 |
Yeah. I'm pretty much persona non grata |
| 00:17:56 |
- Laddie? |
| 00:17:58 |
He's got a wife, kids. |
| 00:18:03 |
He's got a real life now. |
| 00:18:04 |
- Yeah, well, so do I. |
| 00:18:06 |
- This from a guy who lives in a trailer. |
| 00:18:10 |
But at least I know what side I'm on! |
| 00:18:13 |
Alan, if this is the head vampire, |
| 00:18:17 |
If we kill him, |
| 00:18:20 |
...and then on and on like that forever. |
| 00:18:26 |
The O.G. of all bloodsuckers, |
| 00:18:30 |
It's a pyramid scheme, Edgar. |
| 00:18:33 |
Always has been. |
| 00:18:36 |
What if this is it though? |
| 00:18:38 |
What if this really is the head vampire? |
| 00:18:41 |
Get this... |
| 00:18:42 |
...and get it good, Edgar. |
| 00:18:46 |
As far as I'm concerned... |
| 00:18:49 |
...there's no such thing as vampires. |
| 00:18:53 |
Hola, Trashynistas. |
| 00:18:58 |
...DJ X. |
| 00:19:00 |
I'm sorry for those of you |
| 00:19:03 |
I guess you'll just have to take my word |
| 00:19:06 |
...the man's absolutely scrumptious. |
| 00:19:10 |
They'll just have to |
| 00:19:13 |
Yeah, well, |
| 00:19:16 |
So, DJ X, |
| 00:19:20 |
...you know, the disconnected youth |
| 00:19:24 |
...to your parties? |
| 00:19:25 |
Because I create a place... |
| 00:19:27 |
...where all the lost souls of the world |
| 00:19:31 |
A place where they can do |
| 00:19:34 |
...whenever they wanna do it. |
| 00:19:37 |
Yeah, |
| 00:19:39 |
...all you lost boys and girls. This is |
| 00:19:43 |
And we'll let you know where |
| 00:19:47 |
...so stay tuned to this website |
| 00:19:52 |
That was a great interview, X. |
| 00:19:54 |
Thank you so much. |
| 00:19:56 |
No, no, thank you... |
| 00:19:58 |
...for getting the word out. |
| 00:20:00 |
I wanna have as many people at this event |
| 00:20:05 |
It's my pleasure. |
| 00:20:07 |
And I mean that. |
| 00:20:11 |
So anyhow, what do you guys |
| 00:20:16 |
You. |
| 00:20:28 |
Death to all vampires. |
| 00:20:30 |
Maximum body count. |
| 00:20:31 |
We're awesome monster bashers. |
| 00:20:33 |
- The meanest. |
| 00:20:58 |
Edgar. |
| 00:21:00 |
If I'm gonna do this, |
| 00:21:03 |
Lots of weapons. |
| 00:21:05 |
Lots of really expensive, |
| 00:21:10 |
Well, of course. Come in. |
| 00:21:12 |
Hmm. |
| 00:21:17 |
Please have a seat. |
| 00:21:21 |
So aren't you the least bit curious |
| 00:21:25 |
Not really. |
| 00:21:27 |
I know who you are. |
| 00:21:28 |
You're Gwen Lieber. Bestselling author |
| 00:21:33 |
First of which is about to be made |
| 00:21:36 |
...coming soon to a theater near you. |
| 00:21:40 |
Oh, you've heard of me. I'm flattered. |
| 00:21:43 |
Don't be. Your books suck. |
| 00:21:47 |
I'm sorry you feel that way. |
| 00:21:49 |
Doesn't really matter what I think. |
| 00:21:50 |
You've got millions of emo-goth sheep |
| 00:21:54 |
...who eat up every last word of it, |
| 00:21:57 |
I'm sure you've made quite a nice living |
| 00:22:02 |
I'll have you know, I have gotten glowing |
| 00:22:07 |
Bought and paid for, I'm sure. |
| 00:22:10 |
Just like me. |
| 00:22:11 |
What is your problem, Frog? |
| 00:22:13 |
My problem? |
| 00:22:14 |
My problem is you glorify vampirism. |
| 00:22:18 |
You make being a vampire look... |
| 00:22:21 |
...sexy. |
| 00:22:24 |
Well... |
| 00:22:26 |
...there has always been an element |
| 00:22:31 |
There is nothing sexy |
| 00:22:36 |
Well, perhaps I have made a serious mistake |
| 00:22:39 |
If you came to me expecting me to ask |
| 00:22:44 |
But if you came to me |
| 00:22:49 |
...that I can do. |
| 00:23:06 |
Don't like the stake... |
| 00:23:07 |
...maybe it needs a little garlic? |
| 00:23:13 |
Here we go. |
| 00:23:15 |
Freshly served. |
| 00:23:20 |
Shit. |
| 00:23:35 |
Eat that. |
| 00:23:42 |
- Frog. |
| 00:23:46 |
Can you come by my hotel right away? |
| 00:23:48 |
It's rather important. |
| 00:23:49 |
All right. I'll be right there. |
| 00:24:09 |
Hello, Edgar. |
| 00:24:10 |
So, what's so important you need me |
| 00:24:13 |
Well, I thought you should meet |
| 00:24:16 |
When you turned me down, |
| 00:24:21 |
...and I'd really feel bad making him come |
| 00:24:25 |
Hollywood? |
| 00:24:27 |
I don't like the sound of it. Who is this? |
| 00:24:35 |
Lars Von Goetz? |
| 00:24:45 |
Lars, this is... |
| 00:24:47 |
Oh, yeah. The Toad. |
| 00:24:49 |
Frog. |
| 00:24:51 |
- Edgar Frog. |
| 00:24:54 |
Yeah. |
| 00:24:56 |
I'm Lars Von Goetz. |
| 00:24:57 |
But you already knew that. |
| 00:24:59 |
And this is Claus, my camera operator. |
| 00:25:02 |
So let's go kick the shit |
| 00:25:06 |
But first, I gotta eat. |
| 00:25:08 |
I got the metabolism |
| 00:25:10 |
Can I speak with you for a minute? |
| 00:25:13 |
Right. |
| 00:25:16 |
Never fear, Lars Von Goetz is here. |
| 00:25:19 |
As long as the check clears. |
| 00:25:22 |
Lars Von Goetz? |
| 00:25:23 |
You hired Lars Von Goetz? |
| 00:25:27 |
- I thought you'd be happy. |
| 00:25:29 |
First you expect me |
| 00:25:31 |
...then you expect me |
| 00:25:34 |
You're not going to have to babysit him. |
| 00:25:37 |
Haven't you seen his show? |
| 00:25:39 |
The man's wrestled a grizzly bear, |
| 00:25:43 |
He's amazing. |
| 00:25:44 |
That was staged. |
| 00:25:46 |
All reality shows are staged, okay? |
| 00:25:50 |
Von Goetz, whatever his name is, |
| 00:25:53 |
Vampires are, like, |
| 00:25:57 |
- Well, I think he can take care of himself. |
| 00:26:02 |
That creepy guy's looking at me. |
| 00:26:04 |
- Oh, gross. |
| 00:26:06 |
If I'm gonna do this, |
| 00:26:08 |
Right. You said that. |
| 00:26:10 |
I'll go see my guy tomorrow. |
| 00:26:11 |
- You don't want me to come with you? |
| 00:26:15 |
He's a little twitchy about new faces. |
| 00:26:33 |
Listen, buddy, if you're looking |
| 00:26:36 |
...it went out of business last summer. |
| 00:26:38 |
Actually, |
| 00:26:41 |
That's a very serious book, man. |
| 00:26:43 |
Only five in existence. |
| 00:26:44 |
Four, actually. |
| 00:26:46 |
I'm always looking out |
| 00:27:30 |
Edgar, since I know... |
| 00:27:32 |
...I'll never be able to talk you |
| 00:27:36 |
...I can't let you go up against a potential |
| 00:27:40 |
One of the first books on vampire hunting |
| 00:27:44 |
It'll hopefully keep you safe. |
| 00:27:49 |
P.S. If you're still alive on Tuesday, |
| 00:27:53 |
It's her birthday. |
| 00:27:57 |
- Book O'Neer. |
| 00:27:59 |
I need your help with something. |
| 00:28:01 |
- It's important. |
| 00:28:03 |
I'll be waiting. |
| 00:28:12 |
Wow, so the Gwen Lieber |
| 00:28:16 |
Yeah, and I think this book |
| 00:28:19 |
...where they've taken him to. |
| 00:28:20 |
I need you to scour it for any clues, |
| 00:28:23 |
I don't see how this old book is gonna |
| 00:28:28 |
Do me a favor. |
| 00:28:30 |
If you happen to run across |
| 00:28:32 |
...that talks about human sacrifice |
| 00:28:37 |
All right. |
| 00:28:38 |
Cool. |
| 00:28:41 |
Uh, do you wanna tell me why? |
| 00:28:44 |
Not really. |
| 00:28:46 |
Could put your life in danger. |
| 00:28:51 |
Okay. |
| 00:29:21 |
Oh, my gosh. |
| 00:29:53 |
Where's Frog? |
| 00:29:58 |
Back off, fucko! |
| 00:30:00 |
Or what? You gonna mace me? |
| 00:30:08 |
Somebody needed a light? |
| 00:30:11 |
Frog. |
| 00:30:13 |
Ugly. |
| 00:30:22 |
You're dead. |
| 00:30:24 |
Suck on this. |
| 00:30:37 |
Watch out! |
| 00:30:44 |
Nice. |
| 00:30:49 |
Mace? |
| 00:30:50 |
Holy water. |
| 00:30:53 |
I feel like pancakes. |
| 00:30:55 |
Order up. |
| 00:30:58 |
I found a whole section |
| 00:31:01 |
And look, there's a Blood Moon. |
| 00:31:03 |
They call it that because the moon's face |
| 00:31:07 |
So they're gonna make a sacrifice |
| 00:31:12 |
Exactly. |
| 00:31:13 |
This Friday is a Blood Moon. |
| 00:31:16 |
So they're gonna |
| 00:31:19 |
- Well, Edgar, you can't let that happen. |
| 00:31:23 |
...I need to find out where the rave is |
| 00:31:27 |
Well, technically, raves are illegal... |
| 00:31:29 |
...so the promoters aren't gonna say |
| 00:31:32 |
You said that the rumor is that |
| 00:31:36 |
Even if it is here, |
| 00:31:41 |
If we're gonna find out where that nest is... |
| 00:31:44 |
...we need to learn |
| 00:31:47 |
Bloodsuckers have a tendency |
| 00:31:49 |
...that's got a history |
| 00:31:53 |
You know of a place like that here? |
| 00:31:55 |
There's an old slaughterhouse |
| 00:31:59 |
Slaughterhouse? |
| 00:32:02 |
Perfect. |
| 00:32:03 |
Nothing vampires love more |
| 00:32:07 |
If there's a slaughterhouse on that island, |
| 00:32:23 |
Let me go. |
| 00:32:25 |
- I promise, I... |
| 00:32:29 |
Let's not make any promises |
| 00:32:32 |
You just lie here |
| 00:32:37 |
...and maybe I'll bring you |
| 00:33:17 |
Hmm. |
| 00:33:38 |
So where are we going? |
| 00:33:39 |
My friend likes his privacy. |
| 00:33:41 |
The name's Blake. |
| 00:33:42 |
Used to be a congressman |
| 00:33:47 |
What's up with all the razor wire? |
| 00:34:08 |
Yo, Blake. Open up. |
| 00:34:10 |
It's Edgar. |
| 00:34:25 |
Whew. Edgar. |
| 00:34:28 |
- How's it hanging? |
| 00:34:30 |
Holy-water grenade. |
| 00:34:32 |
- Nice touch. |
| 00:34:33 |
- Needs a little work, though. |
| 00:34:36 |
Who the hell's this? |
| 00:34:37 |
Oh, this is Zoe. |
| 00:34:40 |
She's cool. |
| 00:34:41 |
Yeah, I'll be the judge of that. |
| 00:34:44 |
Touch the cross. Do it now. |
| 00:34:50 |
Zoe, manners. |
| 00:34:55 |
- Nice to meet you. |
| 00:34:57 |
What's with the bike? |
| 00:34:59 |
Oh, that's a beauty. |
| 00:35:02 |
Renovations, the lot. |
| 00:35:05 |
Yeah. Unfortunately, wouldn't do us |
| 00:35:09 |
What else you got? |
| 00:35:12 |
Welcome to the lair. |
| 00:35:15 |
What happened to this thing? |
| 00:35:18 |
Looks like something |
| 00:35:20 |
You should see the vampire |
| 00:35:22 |
Let's just say the gun came out |
| 00:35:26 |
Nice new stuff, Blake. |
| 00:35:28 |
I like it. |
| 00:35:32 |
You looking for something |
| 00:35:35 |
Never. |
| 00:35:36 |
Ah, you say that now. |
| 00:35:40 |
Feast your eyes on this. |
| 00:35:41 |
An old Russki RG-6 grenade launcher. |
| 00:35:45 |
Whoa. |
| 00:35:47 |
Heavy. |
| 00:35:49 |
Fires 40 mm fragmentation grenades. |
| 00:35:52 |
Not this one. |
| 00:35:53 |
This one fires these. |
| 00:35:56 |
What is it? Holy water? |
| 00:35:58 |
Mixed with a little garlic. |
| 00:35:59 |
Just for giggles. |
| 00:36:02 |
- I'll take it. |
| 00:36:06 |
- Here you go. |
| 00:36:12 |
What's this? |
| 00:36:13 |
Hey, put that down, please. |
| 00:36:15 |
Very carefully, okay? |
| 00:36:17 |
That is a prototype resin grenade. |
| 00:36:20 |
I stole it from a military testing facility |
| 00:36:25 |
- What does it do? |
| 00:36:35 |
Cool. |
| 00:36:37 |
Yeah, cool. |
| 00:36:39 |
I will take that other resin grenade, |
| 00:36:41 |
Gotta hand it to the grays... |
| 00:36:43 |
...they sure are good at making weapons. |
| 00:36:52 |
Well, it's a pleasure doing business |
| 00:36:55 |
Mm. |
| 00:36:56 |
Say, you guys wanna stay for dinner? |
| 00:37:00 |
Yeah, you do. |
| 00:37:13 |
What the hell are these? |
| 00:37:14 |
Those? |
| 00:37:16 |
- Those are, uh... |
| 00:37:37 |
Vampires. |
| 00:37:38 |
They must have tracked us here. |
| 00:37:44 |
- What did you do to them? |
| 00:37:47 |
Edgar, all the weapons are in the car. |
| 00:37:50 |
I guess we're gonna have to improvise. |
| 00:38:10 |
They've taken out the UV lights. |
| 00:38:17 |
Hi, sweetheart, |
| 00:38:20 |
No. You're not invited. |
| 00:38:42 |
Wait. Where are you going? |
| 00:38:47 |
Holy shit, we gotta get out of here. |
| 00:38:49 |
They'll kill us if we go outside. |
| 00:38:51 |
I'd rather be bit than burned. |
| 00:38:58 |
- Hi there. |
| 00:39:12 |
Say hello to Old Painless. |
| 00:39:15 |
Now, that's what I call a stakeout. |
| 00:39:18 |
It's cool, right? |
| 00:39:19 |
Yeah, it should be. It's my design. |
| 00:40:06 |
If all of these freaks go to the island |
| 00:40:11 |
...we're gonna have a full-on |
| 00:40:16 |
Okay, man, you got the glow sticks? |
| 00:40:18 |
Let's roll. |
| 00:40:21 |
Oh, yeah. |
| 00:40:24 |
Oh, yes. |
| 00:40:26 |
Hey. You didn't tell me... |
| 00:40:27 |
...Lars Von Goetz was gonna be here. |
| 00:40:30 |
- I was kind of hoping he wasn't. |
| 00:40:32 |
- That guy is a total animal. |
| 00:40:34 |
You see the episode |
| 00:40:37 |
- Missed it. |
| 00:40:41 |
Toad. |
| 00:40:44 |
Hmm. |
| 00:40:46 |
So, hmm, who's your friend? |
| 00:40:50 |
Hi. I'm Zoe. |
| 00:40:52 |
Zoe. |
| 00:40:54 |
Tell me, Zoe, is it just me... |
| 00:40:55 |
...or is there some serious chemistry |
| 00:40:59 |
That's just you. |
| 00:41:01 |
Okay. |
| 00:41:05 |
Edgar. |
| 00:41:07 |
I hope you brought your bathing suit. |
| 00:41:09 |
I thought we should blend in |
| 00:41:12 |
Covert infiltration. |
| 00:41:14 |
It's a good idea. |
| 00:41:18 |
Hi, I'm Gwen. |
| 00:41:19 |
Yeah, I know. |
| 00:41:24 |
- I'm Zoe. |
| 00:41:27 |
You work in a bookstore? |
| 00:41:29 |
Part-time. |
| 00:41:31 |
And Edgar thinks that you're qualified |
| 00:41:35 |
Just how many bloodsuckers |
| 00:41:39 |
- None. |
| 00:41:42 |
Well, this is Edgar's show, |
| 00:41:48 |
Did I mention I hated her books? |
| 00:41:51 |
So do I. |
| 00:42:00 |
Rave! |
| 00:42:05 |
All right, everybody. |
| 00:42:08 |
...there's an entrance to the slaughterhouse |
| 00:42:12 |
...which will lead us directly |
| 00:42:16 |
Now, remember, everyone, |
| 00:42:21 |
Toadies, not familiars. |
| 00:42:23 |
Just innocent partygoers who are all there |
| 00:42:27 |
...fun. |
| 00:42:30 |
Because of this, you will be armed... |
| 00:42:33 |
...with weapons that are non-lethal |
| 00:42:36 |
This is a sawed-off, pump action, |
| 00:42:43 |
Patent pending. |
| 00:42:45 |
Turns holy water... |
| 00:42:46 |
...into holy slaughter. |
| 00:42:49 |
Zoe, you take it. |
| 00:42:50 |
Claus... |
| 00:42:53 |
...it's a high-powered UV torch. |
| 00:42:55 |
Tie it around your waist. |
| 00:42:58 |
Edgar, what about me? |
| 00:43:01 |
You're staying here. |
| 00:43:02 |
The hell I am! |
| 00:43:04 |
This is my brother we are talking about. |
| 00:43:06 |
I understand that... |
| 00:43:08 |
...but this is not one of your books, |
| 00:43:11 |
Everybody on this mission |
| 00:43:14 |
You could be killed, or worse... |
| 00:43:17 |
...you could be turned into one of them. |
| 00:43:21 |
Listen, Gwen, I totally buy into |
| 00:43:25 |
...that's what you're paying me to do, |
| 00:43:28 |
If Gwen wants to go, she can go. |
| 00:43:30 |
Not as long as I'm in charge |
| 00:43:34 |
It's all right, Lars. |
| 00:43:36 |
Listen to him. |
| 00:43:39 |
He's an experienced vampire hunter. |
| 00:43:41 |
Wrong. I'm sorry to be the one |
| 00:43:44 |
...but there are no |
| 00:43:47 |
...because there are no vampires. |
| 00:43:50 |
Hmm. |
| 00:43:52 |
Zoe, take these stakes, |
| 00:43:55 |
And why does she get stakes? |
| 00:43:57 |
Oh, I'm sorry. |
| 00:44:00 |
...who wrestled a 6-foot alligator with your |
| 00:44:04 |
No, it was 10-foot. |
| 00:44:06 |
- And I still want stakes. |
| 00:44:10 |
There's some stakes. |
| 00:44:13 |
Why are hers metal? |
| 00:44:15 |
You get what you get. |
| 00:44:17 |
Let's go. |
| 00:44:21 |
Edgar, wait. |
| 00:44:24 |
Bring him back safe. |
| 00:44:26 |
I'll do my best. |
| 00:44:28 |
Move out. |
| 00:44:32 |
Hey, Toad. |
| 00:44:33 |
Couldn't we come back at night? |
| 00:44:37 |
No. Vampires feed at night... |
| 00:44:39 |
...and I don't plan on |
| 00:45:21 |
Is this the VIP room? |
| 00:45:23 |
Oh, most definitely. |
| 00:45:26 |
- When's the party supposed to start? |
| 00:45:30 |
You guys got here early. |
| 00:45:34 |
Oh, are those promise rings? |
| 00:45:38 |
- So cute. |
| 00:46:22 |
Oh! I think I just broke my coccyx. |
| 00:46:25 |
Forget the coccyx, is the camera okay? |
| 00:46:43 |
- Radio check. |
| 00:46:46 |
- Check. |
| 00:46:50 |
All right. Once inside, |
| 00:46:56 |
Killing vampires is our second priority. |
| 00:46:59 |
All right, everybody... |
| 00:47:01 |
...let's rock 'n' roll. |
| 00:47:13 |
Heads up. |
| 00:47:17 |
Hey, did you name your new gun yet? |
| 00:47:19 |
Shh. |
| 00:47:22 |
What? |
| 00:47:23 |
Did you name your new gun yet? |
| 00:47:28 |
What are you talking about? |
| 00:47:30 |
All guns need a name. |
| 00:47:33 |
Like boats. |
| 00:47:34 |
Boats are for sailors... |
| 00:47:36 |
...guns are for soldiers. |
| 00:47:39 |
I'm no sailor. |
| 00:47:46 |
- Lars. |
| 00:47:48 |
I'm getting a really bad feeling about this. |
| 00:47:50 |
Ugh. What, you mean being deep within |
| 00:47:57 |
Are you feeling "Claus-trophobic"? |
| 00:48:01 |
Get it? "Claus-trophobic"? |
| 00:48:04 |
That's not funny. |
| 00:48:06 |
This shit's freaking me out. |
| 00:48:26 |
Jeepers. |
| 00:48:49 |
All right, here's the deal. |
| 00:48:50 |
We're gonna go to the left, |
| 00:48:53 |
Zoe, you're with me. |
| 00:48:55 |
Lars and Claus, do whatever it is you do. |
| 00:48:59 |
We'll reconvene back on the beach... |
| 00:49:01 |
...maybe. |
| 00:49:11 |
You know, |
| 00:49:13 |
People in horror movies always split up |
| 00:49:17 |
There's nothing to worry about, Claus. |
| 00:49:19 |
This is all some stupid role-playing game. |
| 00:49:22 |
All we're gonna find is some little emo goth |
| 00:49:26 |
You think this is a game? |
| 00:49:28 |
Of course I think it's a game. Why else |
| 00:49:33 |
Besides, my fans are tired of seeing me |
| 00:49:38 |
Now, we need to give them |
| 00:49:41 |
But if you're right... |
| 00:49:42 |
...you're gonna be beating up a bunch |
| 00:49:46 |
I know. |
| 00:49:47 |
Isn't it great? |
| 00:50:05 |
This is the entrance |
| 00:50:08 |
Time for Mr. Frog's wild ride. |
| 00:50:13 |
Ow. |
| 00:50:18 |
Claus, we gotta find a place |
| 00:50:22 |
Oh, yeah. |
| 00:50:24 |
This is perfect. |
| 00:50:26 |
Okay. |
| 00:50:30 |
Using my tracking ability, |
| 00:50:34 |
...deep within |
| 00:50:37 |
It's also haunted... |
| 00:50:39 |
...by cannibal pirates. |
| 00:50:42 |
It's built on an |
| 00:50:48 |
...where they used to burn witches. |
| 00:51:32 |
Oh. |
| 00:51:39 |
A promise ring. |
| 00:51:41 |
Virgins. |
| 00:51:42 |
Vampire filet mignon. |
| 00:51:55 |
Ugh. What kind of fucked up shit is this? |
| 00:51:59 |
Are you Peter? |
| 00:52:02 |
Please, help me. |
| 00:52:07 |
Dude. Turn around, let's go. |
| 00:52:08 |
- What? |
| 00:52:11 |
We gotta find him |
| 00:52:13 |
I haven't even had the chance |
| 00:52:16 |
- But he's right here. |
| 00:52:19 |
Sorry, Peter. Let's go. |
| 00:52:20 |
What the fuck? |
| 00:52:22 |
Where are you bastards going? |
| 00:52:28 |
Something smells really bad in here. |
| 00:52:31 |
It's a slaughterhouse. |
| 00:52:33 |
I don't mean the typical |
| 00:52:38 |
...I mean I smell something... |
| 00:52:41 |
Trash. |
| 00:52:42 |
Yeah, like I said. Rotting garbage. |
| 00:52:45 |
No. |
| 00:52:46 |
I mean Jonny Trash. |
| 00:52:51 |
Jeez Louise. |
| 00:52:54 |
Jeez Louise? Really? |
| 00:53:00 |
Zoe, get down! |
| 00:53:11 |
- You hear that? |
| 00:53:14 |
I think it's coming from down there. |
| 00:53:18 |
What are you doing? |
| 00:53:19 |
Lars. |
| 00:53:22 |
Lars. |
| 00:53:51 |
Dude, where's my gear? |
| 00:53:54 |
You left it up... |
| 00:53:57 |
Oh, shit. |
| 00:53:59 |
What? |
| 00:54:02 |
Oh, okay. |
| 00:54:39 |
Is this it? |
| 00:54:41 |
I've been waiting 300 years |
| 00:55:08 |
Have you had enough, punk? |
| 00:55:40 |
Nice outfit. |
| 00:55:42 |
That's funny... |
| 00:55:45 |
...that's exactly what I was thinking. |
| 00:55:48 |
But I still have to kill you. |
| 00:55:53 |
I'm surprised. |
| 00:55:55 |
By what? |
| 00:55:59 |
You're really not that good. |
| 00:56:08 |
- Aah! |
| 00:56:25 |
Zoe. I got this. |
| 00:56:38 |
Ah, shit! Damn bullets! |
| 00:56:43 |
See, now that's what happens |
| 00:56:46 |
Just pull out the sword! |
| 00:56:48 |
- On three. |
| 00:56:51 |
Three. |
| 00:56:53 |
What happened to one and two? |
| 00:56:56 |
Edgar? Edgar? Oh, God. |
| 00:57:00 |
Lars, what's your 20? |
| 00:57:02 |
- It's not Lars, it's Claus. |
| 00:57:05 |
He's dead. |
| 00:57:06 |
Lars is dead. |
| 00:57:07 |
We're so completely and totally fucked. |
| 00:57:10 |
Claus, calm down. Just breathe. |
| 00:57:12 |
We have to get Edgar out of here |
| 00:57:24 |
- Oh, my God. Zoe, what happened? |
| 00:57:28 |
Claus, first-aid kit. |
| 00:57:34 |
Hang in there. |
| 00:57:37 |
Hold this. |
| 00:57:38 |
Edgar, stay with me. |
| 00:57:48 |
Notice anything unusual |
| 00:57:52 |
No, it's a pretty cool place... |
| 00:57:55 |
...if you're a Martian. |
| 00:57:56 |
Or a vampire. |
| 00:57:59 |
Are you guys sniffing old newsprint |
| 00:58:01 |
You think you know what's |
| 00:58:04 |
Well, I'll tell you something. |
| 00:58:07 |
Yeah. You think we just work |
| 00:58:11 |
Actually, I thought it was a bakery. |
| 00:58:13 |
This is just our cover. |
| 00:58:15 |
We're dedicated to a higher purpose. |
| 00:58:18 |
We're fighters for truth... |
| 00:58:21 |
...justice... |
| 00:58:22 |
...and the American way. |
| 00:58:24 |
Edgar. |
| 00:58:29 |
- Edgar. |
| 00:58:32 |
- What happened to me? |
| 00:58:34 |
Did we get him? Did we get Peter? |
| 00:58:37 |
Claus found him, |
| 00:58:41 |
They had him tied |
| 00:58:45 |
...pumping him full of drugs, |
| 00:58:48 |
Where's your boss? Von Geek? |
| 00:58:50 |
Some big-ass, massive juggernaut |
| 00:58:55 |
Tore his heart right out of his chest. |
| 00:58:58 |
Got it on tape, though. |
| 00:59:01 |
I'd like to see that |
| 00:59:03 |
- He'd like that. |
| 00:59:06 |
Gwen... |
| 00:59:08 |
...it's gonna be okay. |
| 00:59:11 |
We'll get him. |
| 00:59:13 |
It's not over yet. |
| 00:59:20 |
Payback's a bitch. |
| 00:59:21 |
Damn straight. Let's go. |
| 00:59:28 |
Rave! Rave! |
| 00:59:34 |
It's starting. |
| 00:59:38 |
All right, come on. |
| 00:59:43 |
Hey! |
| 01:00:07 |
Hey, there. |
| 01:00:08 |
Do you wanna party? |
| 01:00:24 |
And now, |
| 01:00:47 |
Are you ready for a sacrifice? |
| 01:01:00 |
Blood, blood, blood! |
| 01:01:03 |
Blood, blood, blood! |
| 01:01:06 |
Blood, blood, blood! |
| 01:01:09 |
Hold up. |
| 01:01:11 |
Oh, my God. There he is. |
| 01:01:46 |
If they get through that fence, |
| 01:01:49 |
The sooner we take out X, |
| 01:01:52 |
Okay, but what about Peter? |
| 01:01:59 |
All right, listen up, everyone. |
| 01:02:02 |
I've only got one shot at this. |
| 01:02:04 |
I'm gonna immobilize X |
| 01:02:07 |
Everybody, stay put. Got it? |
| 01:02:10 |
- Got it. |
| 01:02:38 |
Put on something nasty, X. |
| 01:02:40 |
I think I found someone |
| 01:02:46 |
He dropped it. I'm going in. |
| 01:02:48 |
Zoe, wait. |
| 01:02:50 |
Get in here and help me. Come on. |
| 01:03:06 |
That is exactly |
| 01:03:14 |
Vinyl still shreds. |
| 01:03:33 |
Very creative, Frog. |
| 01:03:39 |
But when it comes to killing... |
| 01:03:41 |
...I prefer more traditional methods... |
| 01:03:47 |
...like impalement. |
| 01:04:39 |
Claus, cover us! |
| 01:04:44 |
Shit. Shit. |
| 01:04:54 |
You fought admirably. |
| 01:04:58 |
But you were doomed to fail |
| 01:05:04 |
I've fought beside great warriors... |
| 01:05:07 |
...learned battle techniques... |
| 01:05:09 |
...that can only be mastered |
| 01:05:18 |
And do you know |
| 01:05:25 |
Yeah, don't monologue. |
| 01:05:36 |
There's a lot of vampires down here. |
| 01:06:06 |
Guys, I can't hold them off forever. |
| 01:06:18 |
Fuck me. Fuck me! |
| 01:06:26 |
Edgar! |
| 01:06:28 |
Nice work. I've got it. |
| 01:06:45 |
You're right. Impalement is good. |
| 01:06:48 |
Especially when you pierce the heart. |
| 01:07:07 |
Peter. |
| 01:07:11 |
All right, everybody, listen up. |
| 01:07:14 |
You don't have to go home, |
| 01:07:20 |
Peter, can you hear me? |
| 01:07:35 |
- Eew. |
| 01:07:37 |
Edgar, something's wrong. |
| 01:07:40 |
Yeah, I'd say. |
| 01:07:41 |
No, I mean we killed DJ X, |
| 01:07:46 |
Something's wrong. |
| 01:07:52 |
They're still vampires. Nothing's changed. |
| 01:07:55 |
Edgar... |
| 01:07:57 |
...this smells like garlic. |
| 01:08:01 |
Garlic? |
| 01:08:03 |
Let me see. |
| 01:08:06 |
You're right, it... |
| 01:08:11 |
You're the alpha. |
| 01:08:13 |
Oh, I bet you did not see that coming. |
| 01:08:16 |
Thanks to you. |
| 01:08:18 |
If X had been able to drink my blood |
| 01:08:21 |
...my power would have passed to him... |
| 01:08:24 |
...and that would have been a shame. |
| 01:08:26 |
I've been the alpha for a long, long time. |
| 01:08:55 |
You'll never grow old, you'll never die... |
| 01:08:59 |
...but you must feed. |
| 01:09:07 |
I brought you Edgar Frog, |
| 01:09:10 |
Now it is your turn. |
| 01:09:12 |
Remember your promise to me. |
| 01:09:15 |
I just don't wanna grow old. Sorry. |
| 01:09:19 |
Oh... |
| 01:09:22 |
...you won't. |
| 01:09:48 |
They're all yours! |
| 01:09:51 |
Alan, wait! |
| 01:09:54 |
No, no, no, this is not a good time |
| 01:09:58 |
Claus, I need you to get Zoe to safety. |
| 01:10:03 |
Edgar, I'm not leaving without you. |
| 01:10:05 |
If we don't kill Peter right now... |
| 01:10:07 |
...there's gonna be a thousand |
| 01:10:10 |
I need you to warn the world. |
| 01:10:13 |
Especially in case I don't survive. |
| 01:10:15 |
That's not an option. |
| 01:10:19 |
I'll be waiting. |
| 01:10:22 |
Just go. |
| 01:10:26 |
Come on. |
| 01:10:29 |
Claus. |
| 01:10:55 |
I'm disappointed in you, Edgar. |
| 01:10:57 |
This is no way to treat your savior. |
| 01:11:00 |
Savior? You got a funny way |
| 01:11:04 |
I saved you from a life of loneliness. |
| 01:11:07 |
You didn't want to end up |
| 01:11:10 |
- Robert who? |
| 01:11:15 |
The ones without pictures |
| 01:11:18 |
Robert Neville, |
| 01:11:23 |
Last man on Earth |
| 01:11:28 |
Is that really what you want to become? |
| 01:11:30 |
I'm not thirsty. |
| 01:11:38 |
I will, if necessary. |
| 01:11:44 |
But that would be a shame... |
| 01:11:47 |
...especially since I owe you a debt |
| 01:11:51 |
Why didn't you just kill him yourself? |
| 01:11:54 |
A father can't murder his own children. |
| 01:11:57 |
That would be in bad taste. |
| 01:12:00 |
Even an impertinent little shit like DJ X. |
| 01:12:05 |
I told him you can't turn all the cattle |
| 01:12:10 |
...you'll wind up with too many cowboys. |
| 01:12:13 |
But he didn't listen. |
| 01:12:14 |
And now, thanks to his damned raves... |
| 01:12:16 |
...there are going to be far too many |
| 01:12:19 |
That's where you come in. |
| 01:12:21 |
Keep the population down |
| 01:12:25 |
Plenty of blood to drink. |
| 01:12:27 |
Everybody's happy. |
| 01:12:29 |
Precisely. |
| 01:12:30 |
Which is why I want you to keep on doing |
| 01:12:36 |
Hunting and killing vampires. |
| 01:12:39 |
So you want me to be your own personal |
| 01:12:44 |
Crudely worded... |
| 01:12:46 |
...but yes, that's the general idea. |
| 01:12:52 |
And what makes you think... |
| 01:12:55 |
...that I won't just kill you myself? |
| 01:12:58 |
Nothing. |
| 01:12:59 |
Except that you have no real reason. |
| 01:13:04 |
Think about it, Edgar. |
| 01:13:06 |
Your brother's already one of us. |
| 01:13:08 |
Everyone you care about |
| 01:13:14 |
What do you say? |
| 01:13:16 |
I say... |
| 01:13:19 |
...why don't you go suck yourself? |
| 01:13:23 |
Alan, kill your brother. You'll feel better. |
| 01:13:27 |
Alan, no. |
| 01:13:29 |
Don't do this. |
| 01:13:32 |
You're my brother. |
| 01:13:34 |
You're a Frog Brother. |
| 01:13:41 |
Don't make me hurt you. |
| 01:13:48 |
I told you not to make me hurt you. |
| 01:14:06 |
Last chance, Edgar. |
| 01:14:18 |
What the fuck? |
| 01:14:32 |
Fuck you! |
| 01:14:58 |
You okay? |
| 01:15:00 |
Yeah. |
| 01:15:02 |
Fang check. |
| 01:15:07 |
Hmm. |
| 01:15:09 |
Death to all vampires? |
| 01:15:11 |
Maximum body count. |
| 01:15:13 |
We are awesome monster bashers. |
| 01:15:16 |
- The meanest. |
| 01:15:27 |
That's enough of that. |
| 01:16:08 |
Hey. I thought you went to the beach |
| 01:16:12 |
I did, actually, but, uh, |
| 01:16:16 |
He stays out much longer, he's gonna |
| 01:16:21 |
I guess he's making up for lost time. |
| 01:16:23 |
- Yeah. |
| 01:16:26 |
I sold your copy of Destroy All Vampires |
| 01:16:30 |
...for 500 bucks. |
| 01:16:32 |
- Yeah? |
| 01:16:33 |
That's great. |
| 01:16:35 |
That should keep the bank off my butt |
| 01:16:37 |
Now, Zoe, |
| 01:16:41 |
How did you know vampires are real? |
| 01:16:44 |
Just a hunch. |
| 01:16:47 |
What are you reading? |
| 01:16:49 |
Oh, I'm actually scanning the book |
| 01:16:52 |
I decided, you know... |
| 01:16:54 |
...I might as well educate myself about |
| 01:16:58 |
For example, |
| 01:17:01 |
...or female werewolves, she-wolves... |
| 01:17:05 |
...actually can change |
| 01:17:09 |
They don't have to do it under a full moon. |
| 01:17:11 |
They can turn anytime they want to. |
| 01:17:14 |
They have complete control. |
| 01:17:19 |
Now, that's an interesting theory. |
