|
Naked Gun From the Files of Police Squad The
|
| 00:00:47 |
Listen to me! Killing a few hostages |
| 00:00:51 |
The Americans must be made to suffer. |
| 00:00:54 |
We must humiliate them. |
| 00:00:56 |
You do not go far enough, |
| 00:00:59 |
We must strip their entrails out |
| 00:01:03 |
until they include us |
| 00:01:06 |
Nonsense! This solution |
| 00:01:11 |
I say wipe out Washington |
| 00:01:15 |
What? And spoil |
| 00:01:18 |
The Americans believe I'm a nice guy. |
| 00:01:22 |
In some of their polls, I'm more |
| 00:01:28 |
Gentlemen! Gentlemen! |
| 00:01:32 |
If we do nothing else this week, |
| 00:01:36 |
we must conceive |
| 00:01:39 |
that will show all the world |
| 00:01:42 |
that the United States, |
| 00:01:45 |
is but a paper tiger - a weak nation, |
| 00:01:48 |
a weak people, |
| 00:01:53 |
Cowards, no longer willing to fight. |
| 00:02:17 |
I knew it! |
| 00:02:53 |
Hey, who are you? |
| 00:02:56 |
I'm Lieutenant Frank Drebin, |
| 00:02:58 |
And don't ever |
| 00:03:28 |
Watch out! |
| 00:05:28 |
...98, 99, 100. It's all here. |
| 00:05:30 |
This completes |
| 00:05:33 |
100% pure. |
| 00:05:35 |
It better be - all 40 kilos. |
| 00:05:38 |
The final shipment |
| 00:05:41 |
- Then we'll expect payment. |
| 00:06:12 |
Police! Throw down your guns! |
| 00:06:36 |
Kill him. |
| 00:07:24 |
It's a great day for Americans. |
| 00:07:37 |
There he is! |
| 00:07:39 |
No flowers, thank you. |
| 00:07:41 |
Welcome home, Frank. Good work |
| 00:07:45 |
Thanks. I want to know one thing - |
| 00:07:49 |
I'm afraid so. |
| 00:07:52 |
They got married last week. |
| 00:07:55 |
Then it's over. |
| 00:07:59 |
I did it for her. Everything. |
| 00:08:01 |
And now she's gone. |
| 00:08:04 |
And you came down here |
| 00:08:08 |
Pictures of me |
| 00:08:10 |
- Frank... |
| 00:08:14 |
Do any of you understand |
| 00:08:19 |
Frank, they're not here for you. |
| 00:08:21 |
"Weird Al" Yankovic is on the plane. |
| 00:08:28 |
What about the wedding? |
| 00:08:31 |
Don't torture yourself! |
| 00:08:35 |
I can't get her out of my mind. |
| 00:08:38 |
- Do you know anything about him? |
| 00:08:41 |
Just that he's an Olympic gymnast |
| 00:08:43 |
and it's the best sex she's ever had. |
| 00:08:47 |
I trusted her and followed my heart. |
| 00:08:52 |
I'm just gonna have |
| 00:08:54 |
That's why I took my vacation |
| 00:08:59 |
It won't be easy. |
| 00:09:01 |
Everywhere I look, |
| 00:09:06 |
Maybe cops and women just don't mix. |
| 00:09:09 |
What about Nordberg? |
| 00:09:13 |
He's alive, but on life support. |
| 00:09:15 |
He's got a 50/50 chance of living, |
| 00:09:18 |
though there's only |
| 00:09:43 |
Mrs Nordberg, I think |
| 00:09:47 |
Where would you like it sent? |
| 00:09:49 |
- Frank! I'm so glad you came! |
| 00:09:54 |
Thank you, Frank. |
| 00:09:55 |
- Where's Nordberg? |
| 00:09:58 |
Nordberg, it's Frank, your buddy. |
| 00:10:04 |
I'll get it! |
| 00:10:09 |
Get the switch |
| 00:10:15 |
Nordberg, it's me, Frank. |
| 00:10:20 |
I... love you. |
| 00:10:23 |
I love you, too, Nordberg. |
| 00:10:27 |
- Ship... Boat... |
| 00:10:30 |
When you're better, |
| 00:10:34 |
- just like last year. |
| 00:10:36 |
Nurse, give this man some drugs! |
| 00:10:41 |
- Give him a shot, quickly! |
| 00:10:43 |
Heroin! Heroin, Frank! |
| 00:10:46 |
Nordberg, that's a pretty tall order. |
| 00:10:49 |
Give me a couple of days |
| 00:10:54 |
Oh, my poor Nordberg! |
| 00:10:58 |
He never wanted to hurt anyone. |
| 00:11:02 |
It's hard to tell. |
| 00:11:04 |
A gang of thugs, a blackmailer, |
| 00:11:10 |
Frank, get a hold of yourself! |
| 00:11:13 |
A good cop - needlessly cut down |
| 00:11:18 |
- No way for a man to die. |
| 00:11:21 |
A parachute not opening - |
| 00:11:24 |
getting caught in a combine, |
| 00:11:27 |
having your nuts bit off |
| 00:11:29 |
That's the way I want to go. |
| 00:11:33 |
Frank! This is terrible! |
| 00:11:36 |
Don't worry, Wilma. |
| 00:11:41 |
Just think positive. |
| 00:11:46 |
He's right, Wilma, |
| 00:11:48 |
but don't wait till the last minute |
| 00:11:53 |
What I'm trying to say is, |
| 00:11:56 |
he's welcome back at Police Squad. |
| 00:11:58 |
Unless he's a drooling vegetable, |
| 00:12:05 |
Do you know why Nordberg |
| 00:12:11 |
No... |
| 00:12:13 |
But I found this at home in a drawer. |
| 00:12:17 |
A photograph! |
| 00:12:24 |
A Panamanian ship. |
| 00:12:26 |
When he said "I love you", he was |
| 00:12:30 |
I realise that... now. |
| 00:12:33 |
- We'd better check this out. |
| 00:12:37 |
I can't spare anybody. |
| 00:12:39 |
We're in charge of security |
| 00:12:43 |
Wilma, whatever scum did this, |
| 00:12:46 |
no man will rest until he's behind |
| 00:12:55 |
Due to the extraordinary efforts |
| 00:13:00 |
Queen Elizabeth has included |
| 00:13:05 |
as one of the cities she'll visit |
| 00:13:10 |
Will the city hire |
| 00:13:14 |
We have placed the Queen's security |
| 00:13:20 |
a special division |
| 00:13:23 |
represented here |
| 00:13:29 |
Thank you, Your Honour. |
| 00:13:33 |
Louder! |
| 00:13:36 |
- You can use my radio mic. |
| 00:13:45 |
Thank you, Your Honour. |
| 00:13:49 |
is a task that is gladly accepted |
| 00:13:53 |
No matter how silly the idea |
| 00:13:57 |
as Americans we must be gracious |
| 00:14:04 |
Thank you, Lieutenant Drebin. |
| 00:14:07 |
Of course, we all have a stake |
| 00:14:11 |
of the Queen's American tour |
| 00:14:16 |
And we can take pride |
| 00:14:25 |
Indeed, it is for all the people, |
| 00:14:28 |
who will be able to share |
| 00:14:36 |
Especially exciting... |
| 00:14:39 |
will be... the Queen's... |
| 00:14:59 |
We also would like... |
| 00:15:19 |
Ed and I drove to where Nordberg |
| 00:15:24 |
Without leads, you have to start |
| 00:15:29 |
Please disperse. Please disperse. |
| 00:15:32 |
There's nothing for you to see here. |
| 00:15:36 |
Where did they find him? |
| 00:15:38 |
Out there. |
| 00:15:40 |
No, I took care of that |
| 00:15:43 |
It doesn't make sense. |
| 00:15:47 |
then something like this happens. |
| 00:15:49 |
He was found by the nightwatchman. |
| 00:15:51 |
I'm gonna talk to the harbour-master. |
| 00:15:54 |
I'll walk around and snoop. |
| 00:16:01 |
- Yeah? |
| 00:16:05 |
I remember you. What do you want? |
| 00:16:07 |
I wanna ask some questions. |
| 00:16:11 |
I don't know. |
| 00:16:14 |
Oh, yeah? |
| 00:16:17 |
- Still hazy. |
| 00:16:19 |
I remember. Why do you want to know? |
| 00:16:21 |
- I can't tell you. |
| 00:16:25 |
- I don't think I should. |
| 00:16:28 |
- It's Nordberg, he's a cop. |
| 00:16:32 |
- What? |
| 00:16:34 |
Scum! I ought to |
| 00:16:36 |
He worked at Ludwig's Shipping. |
| 00:16:40 |
- What are you gonna do about it? |
| 00:16:43 |
- Maybe this'll help. |
| 00:16:46 |
Can you spot me a 20? How about now? |
| 00:16:49 |
I'm going down to Ludwig's office. |
| 00:16:51 |
I'll find out |
| 00:16:55 |
Vincent Ludwig owned one |
| 00:16:59 |
A respected business man |
| 00:17:02 |
he was to chair the Queen's reception |
| 00:17:05 |
Now I was about to question him about |
| 00:17:15 |
- Mr Ludwig? |
| 00:17:18 |
Lieutenant Drebin to see you, sir. |
| 00:17:23 |
Show him in. |
| 00:17:29 |
- Lieutenant. |
| 00:17:32 |
Nice to meet you, too. Cuban? |
| 00:17:36 |
No, Dutch-lrish. |
| 00:17:40 |
Sit down. |
| 00:17:42 |
- What a magnificent office. |
| 00:17:45 |
Most objects I have collected |
| 00:17:50 |
my Gainsborough, Ming vases. |
| 00:17:54 |
They are objects which I feel |
| 00:17:59 |
like the Japanese fighting fish - |
| 00:18:01 |
beautiful, graceful, elegant... |
| 00:18:04 |
yet single-minded of purpose |
| 00:18:07 |
and deadly when it finds |
| 00:18:10 |
This particular one |
| 00:18:15 |
A luxury item, to be certain, |
| 00:18:18 |
but I am a man who appreciates |
| 00:18:22 |
Oh, this... |
| 00:18:26 |
a gift from Emperor Hirohito. |
| 00:18:28 |
Unbreakable. |
| 00:18:32 |
- Its value is beyond estimation. |
| 00:18:37 |
But I'm sure you didn't pay this |
| 00:18:42 |
To what do I owe the honour? |
| 00:18:45 |
I'm investigating the attempted |
| 00:18:50 |
a man named Nordberg, |
| 00:18:55 |
He is still alive, then? |
| 00:18:57 |
He was shot six times. |
| 00:19:00 |
Fortunately, the bullets missed |
| 00:19:03 |
- The salt water preserved him. |
| 00:19:07 |
So they got him |
| 00:19:09 |
He's in the intensive care ward |
| 00:19:13 |
This certainly comes |
| 00:19:16 |
As you know, I'm not the kind of man |
| 00:19:21 |
There is no room in my organisation |
| 00:19:25 |
Look out there - a vast |
| 00:19:29 |
Do you have any idea what was |
| 00:19:35 |
You bet you do. Orange groves! |
| 00:19:37 |
Acres of them. |
| 00:19:40 |
But now that land will generate |
| 00:19:46 |
Are you all right, Lieutenant? |
| 00:19:48 |
Let me get you some Kleenex. |
| 00:19:51 |
Has this officer - |
| 00:19:54 |
What's his name? Nordberg - |
| 00:19:56 |
been able to tell you anything? |
| 00:20:00 |
Well, he hasn't been able |
| 00:20:05 |
but as soon as |
| 00:20:08 |
we'll see if he |
| 00:20:12 |
- Pardon? |
| 00:20:15 |
I'd like to look |
| 00:20:18 |
and speak to someone in Personnel. |
| 00:20:20 |
Of course. |
| 00:20:22 |
- Dominique, send in Miss Spencer. |
| 00:20:25 |
I am quite busy making arrangements |
| 00:20:30 |
but I will have my assistant |
| 00:20:34 |
You've been very co-operative. |
| 00:20:37 |
My pleasure. |
| 00:20:42 |
Miss Spencer! This is |
| 00:20:47 |
Hello... Mr Drebin. |
| 00:20:50 |
Hello. |
| 00:20:59 |
Oh! |
| 00:21:14 |
Her hair was the colour |
| 00:21:19 |
She had a full set of curves |
| 00:21:22 |
and the kind of legs |
| 00:21:27 |
She gave me a look |
| 00:21:32 |
Yep, this was starting |
| 00:21:42 |
- Nice beaver. |
| 00:21:45 |
- I just had it stuffed. |
| 00:21:51 |
This should be |
| 00:21:54 |
the shipping and employment records |
| 00:21:57 |
Thank you. |
| 00:21:59 |
I've heard police work is dangerous. |
| 00:22:02 |
Yes, that's why I carry a big gun. |
| 00:22:05 |
Couldn't it go off accidentally? |
| 00:22:07 |
I used to have that problem. |
| 00:22:09 |
What did you do about it? |
| 00:22:11 |
I just think about baseball. |
| 00:22:15 |
That's a honey of an ankle-bracelet |
| 00:22:19 |
Did it slip down there again? |
| 00:22:21 |
Yes, well... |
| 00:22:24 |
and get them back to you tomorrow. |
| 00:22:26 |
Fine, but there's no rush. |
| 00:22:31 |
Thank you. I wish there was |
| 00:22:35 |
How about dinner? I know a place |
| 00:22:40 |
It's tempting, but I'm afraid |
| 00:22:44 |
tomorrow being Arbor Day. |
| 00:22:46 |
Of course. Perhaps some other time. |
| 00:22:49 |
- How about a rain check? |
| 00:22:53 |
Thank you for your help, |
| 00:22:57 |
My pleasure. |
| 00:22:59 |
- Well? |
| 00:23:03 |
I'm sorry, my dear. |
| 00:23:05 |
Did you give the lieutenant |
| 00:23:08 |
I gave him copies of the files |
| 00:23:10 |
Good. That's good. |
| 00:23:13 |
He is an intriguing fellow, |
| 00:23:17 |
Well, I don't know. |
| 00:23:21 |
He seems very nice. |
| 00:23:23 |
Jane, I realise |
| 00:23:26 |
but if there is something illegal |
| 00:23:30 |
I need to know about it, |
| 00:23:33 |
That's why I want you to... |
| 00:23:35 |
well, to get to know Drebin |
| 00:23:40 |
find out what he knows. |
| 00:23:42 |
Wouldn't this be best handled |
| 00:23:44 |
We are letting the police handle it, |
| 00:23:48 |
But we need to know |
| 00:23:51 |
before anything |
| 00:23:54 |
Don't forget, I have a responsibility |
| 00:23:58 |
Well... if you put it that way... |
| 00:24:02 |
- Yes, I'll do my best. |
| 00:24:08 |
I'm sure you will. |
| 00:24:16 |
It was about 4pm |
| 00:24:20 |
I wanted to see what the lab had |
| 00:24:25 |
the one they'd found on the docks. |
| 00:24:27 |
You can tell a lot from fibre |
| 00:24:31 |
I was hoping we wouldn't |
| 00:24:34 |
Hey, look out! |
| 00:24:37 |
Police! Halt! |
| 00:24:48 |
Anybody catch the licence plate? |
| 00:24:51 |
Anybody get a look at the driver? |
| 00:24:57 |
Take the names of everybody here |
| 00:25:00 |
I've got to get... inside. |
| 00:25:10 |
Hi, Ed, Ted. You got |
| 00:25:14 |
- We got some action here. |
| 00:25:16 |
We're testing our anti-graffiti wall. |
| 00:25:18 |
We've got customers. |
| 00:25:20 |
It reacts when |
| 00:25:27 |
You've done it again - mazel tov! |
| 00:25:29 |
Good work. |
| 00:25:32 |
Now that you mention it, |
| 00:25:34 |
here's something |
| 00:25:37 |
To the casual observer - |
| 00:25:39 |
But in actuality... |
| 00:25:43 |
And everything a cop would need. |
| 00:25:46 |
We call it the Swiss Army Shoe. |
| 00:25:48 |
- Great. And the fibre samples? |
| 00:25:53 |
See these cufflinks I'm wearing? |
| 00:25:55 |
They're not just cufflinks. Each one |
| 00:26:00 |
that knocks out your victim |
| 00:26:03 |
Let me demonstrate on Ed. |
| 00:26:07 |
Ted! Why? |
| 00:26:11 |
Don't worry. |
| 00:26:14 |
- Why don't you take a pair? |
| 00:26:18 |
I think you'll like them. |
| 00:26:20 |
- Want this, chief? |
| 00:26:23 |
There's something |
| 00:26:26 |
No, no. The other side. |
| 00:26:29 |
As you requested, we took some |
| 00:26:33 |
I'm afraid it doesn't look good. |
| 00:26:36 |
- What do you mean? |
| 00:26:41 |
- I can't see anything. |
| 00:26:46 |
Yeah, I can see it now. |
| 00:26:48 |
At first, it appears |
| 00:26:51 |
But we discovered |
| 00:26:55 |
Pure heroin. |
| 00:26:58 |
How well do you know Nordberg? |
| 00:27:01 |
We were partners for nine years |
| 00:27:04 |
We can't allow personal feelings |
| 00:27:08 |
- Are you saying that Nordberg...? |
| 00:27:12 |
If the press should pick this up, |
| 00:27:15 |
it could be embarrassing |
| 00:27:18 |
I'm sorry, Frank. I'm giving you |
| 00:27:32 |
- Mr Ludwig? |
| 00:27:34 |
- A Mr Pahpshmir is here. |
| 00:27:45 |
Is there something wrong, Mr Ludwig? |
| 00:27:48 |
No, it's nothing. |
| 00:27:50 |
- Then may we get down to business? |
| 00:27:54 |
I can carry out your request. |
| 00:27:57 |
- My price is $20 million. |
| 00:28:03 |
But there is concern |
| 00:28:07 |
that you would be able to... |
| 00:28:12 |
Tell me, Mr Pahpshmir, |
| 00:28:15 |
in all the world, |
| 00:28:20 |
I would think anyone who manages to |
| 00:28:26 |
Yes, but there is |
| 00:28:32 |
One who doesn't know |
| 00:28:37 |
- Care for some tea? |
| 00:28:39 |
Dominique, service for two, please. |
| 00:28:53 |
I must kill Pahpshmir. |
| 00:29:04 |
- Cream and sugar, sir? |
| 00:29:11 |
Cream only, please. |
| 00:29:14 |
- There's a gun on the floor, sir! |
| 00:29:19 |
- The tea, please. |
| 00:29:24 |
Mr Pahpshmir, have you ever seen |
| 00:29:28 |
I think I just have. |
| 00:29:30 |
How will she get near the target? |
| 00:29:33 |
Oh, I doubt whether it will be her. |
| 00:29:37 |
Good secretaries |
| 00:29:40 |
And it seems to me... |
| 00:29:44 |
anyone... can be an assassin. |
| 00:29:51 |
I had 24 hours to find |
| 00:29:55 |
I returned to the hospital |
| 00:29:58 |
to try to jog Nordberg's memory. |
| 00:30:00 |
Doctor, I have the chart, |
| 00:30:04 |
I'll be with you |
| 00:30:07 |
Yes, Doctor. |
| 00:30:15 |
You'll be out of here |
| 00:30:23 |
- I'd like to see Officer Nordberg. |
| 00:30:27 |
Wait a minute! |
| 00:30:30 |
- Drebin called and sent him home. |
| 00:30:34 |
I must kill Nordberg. |
| 00:30:39 |
Drebin, Police Squad! |
| 00:31:11 |
Medical emergency! |
| 00:31:20 |
Drebin, Police Squad. |
| 00:31:25 |
The car! Follow that car! |
| 00:31:27 |
Stephanie, check your mirror. Signal. |
| 00:31:31 |
Now pull into traffic. |
| 00:31:36 |
Try and ease off on the brake. |
| 00:31:40 |
- Give it a little gas. |
| 00:31:47 |
- There he is! |
| 00:32:04 |
Turn right! Follow him! |
| 00:32:06 |
It's OK. |
| 00:32:10 |
down the wrong way |
| 00:32:14 |
Apply the brakes. |
| 00:32:17 |
Now put it in reverse. |
| 00:32:26 |
- You dumb broad! |
| 00:32:29 |
Gently extend your arm. |
| 00:32:32 |
Extend your middle finger. |
| 00:32:38 |
- Very good. Well done. |
| 00:32:41 |
Go for it, Stephanie! |
| 00:33:27 |
Excuse me. Excuse me. |
| 00:33:29 |
All right, move on! |
| 00:33:32 |
Please disperse! |
| 00:33:35 |
Nothing to see here. Please! |
| 00:33:40 |
The attempt on Nordberg's |
| 00:33:44 |
The questions kept coming up |
| 00:33:47 |
like bubbles in a case of soda. |
| 00:33:50 |
Who was this character |
| 00:33:52 |
Why was he trying to kill |
| 00:33:56 |
Did Ludwig lie to me? |
| 00:34:00 |
but somehow, |
| 00:34:02 |
Why was the "I Luv You" |
| 00:34:06 |
If it was, did he know about it? |
| 00:34:09 |
If he didn't, who did? |
| 00:34:11 |
And where the hell was I? |
| 00:34:16 |
It was almost midnight |
| 00:34:19 |
I just wanted |
| 00:34:21 |
but my night was |
| 00:35:02 |
You're late. |
| 00:35:05 |
That depends on what I'm late for. |
| 00:35:08 |
You said we should |
| 00:35:11 |
Tonight became "some time". |
| 00:35:15 |
I'm boiling a roast. |
| 00:35:19 |
How hot and wet do you like it? |
| 00:35:22 |
Very hot and awfully wet. |
| 00:35:27 |
You seem to know your way |
| 00:35:31 |
I'm just as handy |
| 00:35:34 |
That shirt looks familiar. |
| 00:35:36 |
It's yours. I didn't want |
| 00:35:41 |
At least... not yet. |
| 00:35:47 |
Do you mind if I slip |
| 00:35:57 |
There. That's better. |
| 00:36:01 |
I hope you've brought your appetite. |
| 00:36:04 |
I've brought everything. |
| 00:36:06 |
Well, then, dig in. |
| 00:36:13 |
Interesting. Almost as interesting |
| 00:36:17 |
I was young. I needed the work. |
| 00:36:20 |
No, they were taken |
| 00:36:23 |
A ship came in, a Panamanian ship. |
| 00:36:27 |
Probably an oversight. |
| 00:36:29 |
How is your... meat? |
| 00:36:35 |
You be the judge of that. |
| 00:36:41 |
Mmm... |
| 00:36:45 |
I've got nine more. |
| 00:36:52 |
- Have you seen that ship? |
| 00:36:55 |
It doesn't look like ours, |
| 00:36:59 |
Has Officer Nordberg |
| 00:37:01 |
No, there's been another attempt |
| 00:37:05 |
That's terrible! |
| 00:37:10 |
If it wasn't, I'd be out of a job, |
| 00:37:12 |
but I'd give it up tomorrow |
| 00:37:18 |
That's beautiful. |
| 00:37:23 |
This is all happening too fast. |
| 00:37:28 |
- I've been hurt before. |
| 00:37:34 |
I'd known her for years. |
| 00:37:36 |
We used to go to |
| 00:37:40 |
How I loved her, |
| 00:37:43 |
I think she had her music. |
| 00:37:46 |
She'd hang out with the |
| 00:37:49 |
I don't recall her playing |
| 00:37:53 |
Yet she was on the road |
| 00:37:56 |
I bought her a harp for Christmas. |
| 00:38:03 |
It's the same old story. |
| 00:38:06 |
Boy loses girl. Girl finds boy. |
| 00:38:08 |
Boy forgets girl. Boy remembers girl. |
| 00:38:11 |
Girl dies in a blimp accident |
| 00:38:14 |
over the Orange Bowl |
| 00:38:17 |
- Goodyear? |
| 00:38:20 |
Poor dear! |
| 00:38:24 |
Now, now. I don't want to upset you. |
| 00:38:28 |
Frank, it's not that. |
| 00:38:31 |
Why did you have to be so wonderful? |
| 00:38:35 |
- There's something I must tell you. |
| 00:38:39 |
What's in the past |
| 00:38:42 |
Maybe... |
| 00:38:44 |
Maybe we're just two lonely souls |
| 00:38:52 |
Funny-face! |
| 00:39:11 |
I want you to know... |
| 00:39:15 |
So do I. |
| 00:40:47 |
I had a wonderful day, Frank. I can't |
| 00:40:52 |
You really mean that? |
| 00:40:55 |
because we exchanged bodily fluids? |
| 00:40:57 |
No, I really mean it. |
| 00:41:01 |
- Can I interest you in a nightcap? |
| 00:41:05 |
Actually, I'm on stake-out tonight. |
| 00:41:07 |
I'll be thinking about you. |
| 00:41:12 |
OK. |
| 00:41:20 |
Good night! |
| 00:41:32 |
The answer's up there |
| 00:41:35 |
Call it what you will - |
| 00:41:38 |
Ludwig knows more than he's saying. |
| 00:41:40 |
A hunch won't stand up in court. |
| 00:41:44 |
He's the only one except us |
| 00:41:48 |
Next thing we know, |
| 00:41:52 |
Maybe. But breaking into Ludwig's |
| 00:41:57 |
I know. You take a chance |
| 00:42:00 |
crossing the street |
| 00:42:03 |
There he is! |
| 00:42:09 |
Just trust me on this, Ed. |
| 00:42:12 |
OK, but be careful. |
| 00:42:14 |
Get some sleep. |
| 00:43:07 |
Bingo! |
| 00:43:53 |
"20,000,000 deposited, |
| 00:43:56 |
"upon proof of Queen's death." |
| 00:46:15 |
Destroying property, arson... |
| 00:46:17 |
sexual assault |
| 00:46:20 |
What the hell were you doing there? |
| 00:46:23 |
I'm sorry about that, Your Honour, |
| 00:46:25 |
but we believe Ludwig is involved |
| 00:46:29 |
That's ridiculous! |
| 00:46:33 |
Well... it... burned in the f-fire. |
| 00:46:37 |
Gentlemen, |
| 00:46:39 |
Vincent Ludwig is one of the most |
| 00:46:43 |
If we're very nice to him, |
| 00:46:48 |
- Your Honour! |
| 00:46:50 |
Yes, Your Honour. Good day. |
| 00:46:55 |
Drebin! |
| 00:46:57 |
I don't want any more trouble like |
| 00:47:03 |
When I see five weirdos dressed |
| 00:47:08 |
I shoot the bastards. |
| 00:47:11 |
That was a Shakespeare in the Park |
| 00:47:18 |
- You killed five actors! Good ones. |
| 00:47:23 |
Your presence at the Queen's |
| 00:47:27 |
Is that understood? |
| 00:47:29 |
We understand, Your Honour. |
| 00:47:54 |
The plane has taxied to a stop. |
| 00:47:56 |
Any minute now |
| 00:47:59 |
and we'll get a glimpse |
| 00:48:02 |
as she begins her first visit |
| 00:48:06 |
It's a balmy, beautiful evening too. |
| 00:48:09 |
She's going from here |
| 00:48:19 |
- Jane! |
| 00:48:23 |
I'm just making some dinner. |
| 00:48:26 |
Maybe just a bite. |
| 00:48:28 |
Ludwig wanted me to ask you |
| 00:48:31 |
There is something you should know. |
| 00:48:35 |
How nice! Did he show you his |
| 00:48:40 |
Jane, I think that he's involved |
| 00:48:44 |
Frank, stop it! |
| 00:48:46 |
Vincent Ludwig is a well-respected, |
| 00:48:50 |
- You don't know him like I do. |
| 00:48:53 |
- What's that supposed to mean? |
| 00:48:58 |
I don't trust him and I don't want |
| 00:49:02 |
Are Woo back in business? |
| 00:49:05 |
Gee, has it been that long? I don't |
| 00:49:12 |
It's sweet of you to be concerned, |
| 00:49:16 |
He's such a gentleman. |
| 00:49:20 |
He just wants to talk with you |
| 00:49:22 |
to clear up any doubts |
| 00:49:25 |
- When? |
| 00:49:28 |
Meet him at the 7th Street |
| 00:49:30 |
All right, |
| 00:49:33 |
Of course I will, |
| 00:49:38 |
I've got to go. See you tomorrow. |
| 00:49:41 |
Are you sure you won't have |
| 00:50:08 |
Ludwig? |
| 00:50:11 |
- Drebin? |
| 00:50:14 |
I have a message for you |
| 00:50:20 |
I'm sorry, I can't hear you! |
| 00:50:22 |
Don't fire the gun |
| 00:50:47 |
All right, put your gun down |
| 00:51:24 |
Matthews, stake out that end, |
| 00:51:26 |
and card-check for |
| 00:51:30 |
Frank, what are you doing here? |
| 00:51:32 |
I've been trading shots |
| 00:51:36 |
They're planning |
| 00:51:40 |
- We better be on the lookout. |
| 00:51:46 |
- What's the meaning of this? |
| 00:51:51 |
- I didn't do anything. |
| 00:51:54 |
You think we were born yesterday? |
| 00:51:58 |
I got rights! |
| 00:52:00 |
Ed, he's got a picture of your wife! |
| 00:52:03 |
Ethel! |
| 00:52:06 |
All right, |
| 00:52:09 |
That's all right, Frank. |
| 00:52:23 |
Are you enjoying yourself, my dear? |
| 00:52:25 |
I'm so excited to be here. |
| 00:52:29 |
Pleasure's all mine. |
| 00:52:35 |
- Drebin! |
| 00:52:37 |
You're both right. |
| 00:52:40 |
This is not the time |
| 00:52:43 |
It's way past the time we talked. |
| 00:52:45 |
The gloves are off, |
| 00:52:48 |
It's fourth and fifteen, and |
| 00:52:52 |
Mr Drebin! |
| 00:52:56 |
If not, I am warning you - |
| 00:53:00 |
Or it will cost you dearly. |
| 00:53:04 |
- Frank, what's wrong? |
| 00:53:09 |
A meeting that turned into |
| 00:53:12 |
set up by someone |
| 00:53:15 |
Funny-face, |
| 00:53:18 |
My stockyard meeting, butter-wings. |
| 00:53:22 |
Mr Ludwig said you'd called it off! |
| 00:53:25 |
Thumb me another one, shuckie-lumps! |
| 00:53:28 |
Frank, it's the truth! |
| 00:53:30 |
Cops and women don't mix. |
| 00:53:34 |
It'll clean you out, |
| 00:53:38 |
Too bad, sugar-puff. |
| 00:53:41 |
We could have been something. |
| 00:53:44 |
I only did what I was told to do! |
| 00:53:47 |
- Like make love to me? |
| 00:53:50 |
That makes things easier, Princess. |
| 00:53:53 |
To think I trusted you! |
| 00:53:56 |
- You can take this back. |
| 00:54:01 |
Doesn't matter. |
| 00:54:07 |
By the way... |
| 00:54:09 |
I faked every orgasm. |
| 00:54:11 |
Funny-face! |
| 00:54:14 |
And to commemorate our friendship, |
| 00:54:17 |
the city of Los Angeles is proud |
| 00:54:21 |
this Revolutionary War musket, |
| 00:54:28 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 00:54:31 |
Queen Elizabeth II! |
| 00:55:08 |
It's disgusting the way they splash |
| 00:55:13 |
What is journalism coming to? |
| 00:55:15 |
You're laying on top of the Queen |
| 00:55:19 |
and they call that news! |
| 00:55:20 |
They can't kick you off the Force, |
| 00:55:24 |
I know. Life isn't always fair. |
| 00:55:27 |
Just think, the next time I shoot |
| 00:55:32 |
Hey, look at that! |
| 00:55:34 |
The missing evidence in the Kilner |
| 00:55:39 |
He went to the chair |
| 00:55:42 |
Well... what's the use? |
| 00:55:46 |
What good are these damn awards |
| 00:55:49 |
Frank... |
| 00:55:50 |
Frank, that's not your desk! |
| 00:55:53 |
Frank! I've been |
| 00:55:56 |
Running another errand |
| 00:55:59 |
I tried to call last night. |
| 00:56:03 |
I was out walking. All night. |
| 00:56:05 |
Listen to me! |
| 00:56:08 |
There was never anything |
| 00:56:12 |
- He likes East German men. |
| 00:56:15 |
I like cops. |
| 00:56:17 |
- All right! Yeah! |
| 00:56:22 |
- What've you got? |
| 00:56:25 |
You were right. He is planning to |
| 00:56:30 |
- Where? |
| 00:56:32 |
The Queen will be there |
| 00:56:36 |
Is Ludwig going to shoot her |
| 00:56:40 |
No, a player, |
| 00:56:42 |
- It starts in 20 minutes. |
| 00:56:45 |
- I'll go with you. |
| 00:56:48 |
- to allay suspicion. |
| 00:56:51 |
Wait! Wait! |
| 00:56:53 |
I've gotten you into enough trouble |
| 00:56:57 |
No! This'll get you back on |
| 00:57:05 |
Frank? I wanted you to know now, |
| 00:57:09 |
I've loved you since the first day |
| 00:57:13 |
I'm a very lucky woman. |
| 00:57:15 |
So am I. |
| 00:57:25 |
Good afternoon. |
| 00:57:29 |
where the California Angels |
| 00:57:32 |
in their showdown |
| 00:57:37 |
Hello! I'm Curt Gowdy, |
| 00:57:40 |
Tim McCarver, Dick Vitale, Mel Allen, |
| 00:57:43 |
Dick Enberg and Dr Joyce Brothers. |
| 00:57:46 |
Join us for this |
| 00:57:49 |
And a special game it is. |
| 00:57:51 |
As we know, it is being attended |
| 00:57:55 |
I'm sure she'll enjoy this game, Jim. |
| 00:57:58 |
We've got all the exits covered. |
| 00:58:00 |
I ought to arrest Ludwig right now. |
| 00:58:02 |
No, we've got to let him |
| 00:58:06 |
The Mayor would have you arrested. |
| 00:58:10 |
I've got to get that assassin. |
| 00:58:12 |
It could be any of those players. |
| 00:58:15 |
I've got to get down on that field |
| 00:58:18 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 00:58:22 |
Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II! |
| 00:58:32 |
One moment. |
| 00:58:36 |
Over there - these seats are taken. |
| 00:58:54 |
My dear, is something bothering you? |
| 00:58:58 |
No, why do you ask? |
| 00:58:59 |
You haven't said a word. |
| 00:59:03 |
Well, you know how important |
| 00:59:08 |
Why he not here now? |
| 00:59:12 |
Mr Pallazzo, our head usher will |
| 00:59:17 |
- He should be here now! |
| 00:59:21 |
I do not wait for him! |
| 00:59:29 |
- Yes? |
| 00:59:31 |
I am the head usher. |
| 00:59:40 |
- Mr Pallazzo? |
| 00:59:44 |
- I am the head usher. |
| 00:59:48 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 00:59:49 |
on behalf of the California Angels |
| 00:59:53 |
on the occasion of the royal visit, |
| 00:59:56 |
please welcome |
| 00:59:59 |
Enrico Pallazzo! |
| 01:00:04 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 01:00:08 |
as Mr Pallazzo will now sing |
| 01:01:32 |
And now we'll wait |
| 01:01:36 |
and the start of today's ball game. |
| 01:01:46 |
Excuse me, could you tell me, |
| 01:01:54 |
The Queen's visit |
| 01:01:57 |
And the fans are being entertained |
| 01:02:02 |
showing some unusual moments |
| 01:02:25 |
Sorry, fellas! |
| 01:02:53 |
How about that? |
| 01:02:57 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 01:02:59 |
now taking the field - |
| 01:03:10 |
For everybody's safety, |
| 01:03:13 |
we ask that you do not throw |
| 01:03:17 |
We thank you for your co-operation. |
| 01:03:22 |
As the Angels take the field, we're |
| 01:03:27 |
with the Queen of England |
| 01:03:34 |
How about that? |
| 01:03:38 |
We're ready for the start, |
| 01:03:40 |
as these lovely ladies would agree. |
| 01:03:43 |
Those are the players' wives, |
| 01:03:54 |
What d'you say, Cummings? |
| 01:03:57 |
Do what? |
| 01:03:59 |
Play ball! |
| 01:04:04 |
Frank! Al, it's Frank! |
| 01:04:11 |
The game's under way. Dave Spiwack |
| 01:04:34 |
- Nothing to report. |
| 01:04:37 |
If one of the players is the killer, |
| 01:04:41 |
even if he has to search |
| 01:04:44 |
...lead-off hitter Jay Johnstone. |
| 01:04:47 |
Hello, pal. Let's see |
| 01:04:51 |
Good here. Now let's see the shirt. |
| 01:04:56 |
It's a little tight in the crotch. |
| 01:04:59 |
All right? All set? |
| 01:05:03 |
OK, play ball! |
| 01:05:33 |
Strike? |
| 01:05:38 |
Yeah, strike! |
| 01:05:53 |
Stee-rike two! |
| 01:06:11 |
Stee-rike three! |
| 01:07:04 |
You're clean! |
| 01:08:52 |
Have you found him yet? |
| 01:08:54 |
No, and I've searched |
| 01:08:56 |
Yeah. There's only one more out |
| 01:09:00 |
You're going to have to stall them. |
| 01:09:05 |
Right. |
| 01:09:08 |
The Mariners' number four - |
| 01:09:20 |
- Ball! |
| 01:09:33 |
Ball! |
| 01:09:46 |
Get... get... what the...? Get off! |
| 01:09:49 |
Catch it! Catch it! |
| 01:09:56 |
- Get 'em off! |
| 01:10:02 |
- Safe! |
| 01:10:04 |
I don't believe it! |
| 01:10:08 |
Second base! On two! |
| 01:10:11 |
There's a throw by the catcher |
| 01:10:13 |
and now they've got Criscione |
| 01:10:17 |
What the hell are you doing? |
| 01:10:19 |
What? |
| 01:10:20 |
- You're not supposed to do that! |
| 01:10:25 |
Put that back down! Give me the ball! |
| 01:10:30 |
I'll get you! |
| 01:10:31 |
It's hard to believe, |
| 01:10:34 |
but apparently the umpires |
| 01:10:40 |
- Safe! |
| 01:10:42 |
How about that? |
| 01:10:43 |
- Out! |
| 01:10:45 |
- Out! |
| 01:10:47 |
- Out! |
| 01:10:48 |
There's a sight I've never seen! |
| 01:10:52 |
- Safe! |
| 01:10:54 |
Safe! Safe! Safe! |
| 01:10:56 |
- He was out! |
| 01:10:58 |
You idiot! He was out! |
| 01:11:01 |
All right, you're out of here! |
| 01:11:04 |
- What? |
| 01:11:07 |
All right, YOU'RE out! |
| 01:11:10 |
Hold on! Even the guy running |
| 01:11:14 |
And he's up in the mezzanine! |
| 01:11:17 |
It's the third out! |
| 01:11:35 |
I must kill... the Queen. |
| 01:11:43 |
I must kill... the Queen. |
| 01:11:48 |
Frank, it's the right-fielder! |
| 01:11:56 |
- You're the boss! |
| 01:12:00 |
Now, we're going to take a walk. |
| 01:12:02 |
How could you |
| 01:12:05 |
It was easy. Don't forget I spent |
| 01:12:10 |
Now, let's go quietly. |
| 01:12:17 |
Hey, look at that! Let's get him! |
| 01:12:29 |
Kick him in the balls! |
| 01:13:03 |
I must kill... the Queen. |
| 01:13:17 |
Look out! |
| 01:13:23 |
The umpire... |
| 01:13:27 |
That's not the umpire, Your Honour. |
| 01:13:33 |
Hey, it's Enrico Pallazzo! |
| 01:13:46 |
Frank! Frank, help! |
| 01:13:49 |
Frank! Frank, help! Frank! |
| 01:14:06 |
Hold it, Ludwig! |
| 01:14:08 |
Stay where you are! |
| 01:14:10 |
- He's got a gun! |
| 01:14:13 |
You ruined my life. |
| 01:14:16 |
- Leave the girl alone! |
| 01:14:19 |
I see. |
| 01:14:25 |
Two can play at that game! |
| 01:14:33 |
- You killed him! |
| 01:14:36 |
He'll be all right. |
| 01:14:44 |
Well... |
| 01:15:10 |
Frank... it's horrible! |
| 01:15:14 |
- It's so horrible! |
| 01:15:19 |
My father went the same way. |
| 01:15:36 |
I must kill... Frank Drebin. |
| 01:15:40 |
I must kill... Frank Drebin. |
| 01:15:44 |
No, no, don't shoot! |
| 01:15:46 |
Jane... it's me... |
| 01:15:52 |
Funny-face. |
| 01:15:54 |
I must kill Frank Drebin. |
| 01:15:57 |
You love Frank Drebin. |
| 01:16:00 |
And Frank Drebin loves you. |
| 01:16:03 |
Jane, if you don't love me, |
| 01:16:07 |
because without you, |
| 01:16:13 |
I've finally found |
| 01:16:16 |
a good, clean love... |
| 01:16:20 |
I must kill Frank Drebin. |
| 01:16:24 |
It's a topsy-turvy world, Jane, |
| 01:16:26 |
and maybe the problems of two people |
| 01:16:31 |
but this is our hill |
| 01:16:36 |
Since I met you, I've noticed |
| 01:16:40 |
birds singing, dew glistening |
| 01:16:44 |
stop lights... |
| 01:16:46 |
I must kill... |
| 01:16:48 |
Jane, this morning... |
| 01:16:51 |
I bought something for you. |
| 01:16:55 |
but pretty good |
| 01:17:00 |
It's an engagement ring. |
| 01:17:02 |
I'd have given it to you earlier, |
| 01:17:04 |
but I wanted to wait |
| 01:17:11 |
- I... |
| 01:17:19 |
Oh, Frank! |
| 01:17:33 |
I'm sorry! |
| 01:17:45 |
I'm sorry that I yelled at you |
| 01:17:52 |
Drebin! |
| 01:17:53 |
I was wrong about you. |
| 01:17:56 |
This city and the whole world |
| 01:18:00 |
Thank you. |
| 01:18:01 |
And Monday morning |
| 01:18:04 |
- with a promotion to captain. |
| 01:18:08 |
Don't thank me. There's someone else |
| 01:18:13 |
- Nordberg! |
| 01:18:15 |
The doc says |
| 01:18:18 |
- And back on the Force! |
| 01:18:23 |
Frank! Everyone should have |
