RV Runaway Vacation

en
00:00:38 "Once in every nighttime,
00:00:43 - "I'm coming to get you."
00:00:47 "There's someone
00:00:53 "Cassie."
00:00:57 "I'm coming."
00:01:00 Who's there?
00:01:03 - "The Tickle Monster."
00:01:07 "That's right, Sylvester Stallone
00:01:12 "I'm gonna tickle you."
00:01:15 "What?"
00:01:18 "What?"
00:01:21 Daddy, help.
00:01:24 I'm here, Cassie.
00:01:29 Oh, hand-to-hand.
00:01:32 - Look, over there.
00:01:34 "Oh, dear."
00:01:36 - Is she still up?
00:01:38 Yeah, I just gave her a warm bath...
00:01:40 ...and now she's more wide-awake
00:01:42 She won't be so sharp
00:01:46 - Good night, sweetie.
00:01:49 Well, if I can get Carl to sleep
00:01:52 ...you might still have a shot tonight.
00:01:55 - Daddy?
00:01:59 I'm never gonna get married.
00:02:01 Why not? It's not as bad as it looks.
00:02:04 Because I always want to live here
00:02:08 Well, you know, one day,
00:02:11 ...meet a wonderful guy,
00:02:15 But you and I
00:02:22 Good night, Cassie.
00:02:27 Dad, could you be any more of a dork?
00:02:29 Cassie, you know where this girl lives
00:02:32 I know where,
00:02:35 - And you refuse to go that way.
00:02:38 - lf you consider getting there stupid.
00:02:41 Because Sacajawea back there
00:02:45 She knows it as "the one
00:02:48 Hey, Dad,
00:02:50 If we don't find this house
00:02:52 - There it is.
00:02:53 ...hurry up, go get your friend.
00:02:55 - Jerk.
00:02:57 Good.
00:03:01 - Where are they?
00:03:04 Okay.
00:03:06 Which friend is this, the nice one?
00:03:08 You used to know all her friends.
00:03:10 - You were funny and charming.
00:03:12 She doesn't want me to be charming.
00:03:15 Oh, no.
00:03:16 It's the too-nice one.
00:03:18 Hi, thanks for inviting me.
00:03:20 Any friend of Cassie's
00:03:22 We're a little late.
00:03:27 Remember, congratulate Todd
00:03:29 ...tell him the house looks great,
00:03:32 - Maybe he smells nice.
00:03:34 No, don't touch him.
00:03:36 - Oh, right, Mr. Stupid-Germ-Phobia.
00:03:39 There they are, old Bob Bobcat.
00:03:42 - Teabag.
00:03:44 Hi. Hi.
00:03:46 Well, congratulations on Alpine soda.
00:03:48 - Bob said you'd do it.
00:03:50 God, Jamie, if my ex-wife
00:03:53 ...I'd still be in the middle
00:03:58 Thank you, Todd.
00:04:03 Oh, there's Laird.
00:04:05 Laird.
00:04:07 - So that's the young hotshot?
00:04:09 Harvard M.B.A.
00:04:11 Do you want in?
00:04:13 - Cassie.
00:04:16 Laird. You know what'd be great?
00:04:21 I'm not joking.
00:04:24 Cass, go say hi to Todd.
00:04:26 - What for?
00:04:29 Can I come?
00:04:31 Okay.
00:04:33 Okay.
00:04:36 Hi, Mr. Mallory.
00:04:40 - Oh, Cassie Munro.
00:04:44 Wow, you turned into quite
00:04:46 This is my friend, Gretchen.
00:04:48 - Hi, Gretch.
00:04:49 Aren't you the one who got
00:04:53 That was me. Cassie's dad helped,
00:04:56 ...but I am el presidente.
00:04:58 Wow, so you're, like,
00:05:01 ...for destroying the health
00:05:03 - Gretchen.
00:05:06 Obesity, diabetes, cholesterol.
00:05:08 The fat of our youth is on your hands.
00:05:28 Thank you, I had a very nice time.
00:05:34 Keep it real.
00:05:37 Don't.
00:05:49 Yo, homeslice,
00:05:52 You're boiling my vibe.
00:05:54 Respect.
00:05:58 Cass, can we talk?
00:06:00 - God, what?
00:06:03 Father evil. Forgot that.
00:06:07 How you doing, are you all right?
00:06:09 - No, not really.
00:06:12 Feels like that.
00:06:14 Oh, Bob just came in.
00:06:18 - Did you talk to Cassie?
00:06:20 Still bleeding a little bit.
00:06:22 She didn't know Gretchen
00:06:24 She didn't know her friend was gonna
00:06:28 Wine or martini?
00:06:30 - Both, with a Prozac back.
00:06:33 Remember when it used to be
00:06:36 We watch TV
00:06:38 ...and we IM each other
00:06:40 Well, then let's change things.
00:06:42 Let's start while we're in Hawaii.
00:06:44 No laptop, no BlackBerry,
00:06:47 - Let's really go.
00:06:48 You're not gonna see them
00:06:51 - Carl's got camp...
00:06:53 Cassie's got college prep
00:06:55 That's right, and they leave
00:06:58 It'll be the same in Hawaii. They'll
00:07:01 Well, I'm glad we're going.
00:07:05 Todd loves you.
00:07:09 I'm afraid not.
00:07:10 I think Laird's gonna get my job.
00:07:15 What did you say?
00:07:16 Nothing.
00:07:20 Here you go.
00:07:23 To true love.
00:07:26 - Hawaii's gonna be great.
00:07:30 You gotta cancel Hawaii.
00:07:32 - Why?
00:07:34 - Since yesterday?
00:07:37 - Garry.
00:07:39 Garry's still for it.
00:07:41 ...he'll quack like a duck.
00:07:43 If I tell my wife we're not going
00:07:46 You have a place to park your bike.
00:07:48 - Bob.
00:07:49 - Bob.
00:07:50 Bob. Bob,
00:07:54 - Really?
00:07:56 ...I figured I gotta fire you
00:08:00 But in light of this Alpine thing...
00:08:03 ...I still need you.
00:08:06 I gotta run out there
00:08:08 I can write the presentation in Hawaii
00:08:11 Laird can write me a presentation.
00:08:15 He'll shower
00:08:17 But you've got one thing
00:08:19 - A soul.
00:08:22 You've got the chutzpah.
00:08:23 So I want you
00:08:26 ...and I need you at the meeting
00:08:28 - Yeah.
00:08:30 - No.
00:08:34 Just move your Hawaii dates.
00:08:36 The kids are booked
00:08:38 - You have to go to Boulder.
00:08:41 I want you to know, after the divorce,
00:08:45 Bring jewelry.
00:08:47 Hey, if you get Jamie,
00:08:49 - You want Elaine?
00:08:52 Trust me, it's not better.
00:08:54 Elaine is still mad at me
00:08:57 Figures that's why
00:09:00 - Oh, the RV trip.
00:09:02 Oh, the famous RV trip.
00:09:05 Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:09:09 Did you rent that RV?
00:09:18 Mom, some idiot just parked
00:09:22 What?
00:09:26 Oh, my God, it's your husband.
00:09:31 - Oh, hi.
00:09:35 - It's an RV.
00:09:38 - We're taking it on vacation.
00:09:41 - No, it doesn't float. Colorado.
00:09:44 Come on, Hawaii's
00:09:48 The place I'm taking you is special,
00:09:51 It's Lake Nirvana,
00:09:54 Is he being funny?
00:09:57 Oh, come on.
00:09:59 This is what he came up with
00:10:02 I was gonna surf.
00:10:04 The hotel in Hawaii
00:10:07 Doesn't anybody
00:10:14 We're not campers. We don't camp.
00:10:17 - Why not?
00:10:20 - For one thing, we like to shower.
00:10:23 You and I will go out right now
00:10:25 Bob, do you know where you stay
00:10:28 - Where?
00:10:30 Honey, try to remember,
00:10:32 In Hawaii, we'll never see the kids.
00:10:34 This way,
00:10:38 You need to spend time with them.
00:10:40 I spend nine hours a day with them.
00:10:43 All right, we'll go to Hawaii.
00:10:45 At Christmas. Then it will just be us
00:10:48 - We'll have all the ham to ourselves.
00:10:51 No, you won't, because I'll cook
00:10:53 We were gonna take naps.
00:10:57 ...lock-the-door naps.
00:11:00 - How are we gonna do that in an RV?
00:11:03 - I was gonna get a massage.
00:11:06 You're gonna do all the cooking,
00:11:09 And spend time with the kids.
00:11:10 You got it.
00:11:13 Did you cancel our Hawaii trip
00:11:17 Did you volunteer us
00:11:20 The family travels around and drinks
00:11:23 ...see if our teeth fall out?
00:11:24 Honey, I'm running out of time
00:11:31 Come on, baby. Why don't you
00:11:34 ...with your big, brawny man?
00:11:36 Don't make me call
00:11:42 Bob.
00:11:46 Here's something your genius
00:11:48 Four miles to the gallon?
00:11:50 Gee, why don't we just stay home
00:11:56 There's an elegant touch.
00:12:00 Or we could just travel around
00:12:04 I spent the night with my head
00:12:10 All right, no more details.
00:12:18 - That's my couch. Move.
00:12:25 - This seat's better, anyway.
00:12:44 Welcome aboard, everybody.
00:12:47 ...I think we should give
00:12:51 The Big Turd.
00:12:53 The Big Rolling Turd.
00:12:55 In that spirit, we set forth.
00:13:35 Make it so, Number One.
00:13:43 Honey, are you sure know how to..?
00:13:45 - Honey?
00:13:51 Thanks.
00:13:54 Oh, my God.
00:14:00 - Honey, honey.
00:14:02 - Oh, tree.
00:14:09 Honey?
00:14:10 Honey. Honey.
00:14:12 Oh, my God.
00:14:15 - We're okay.
00:14:17 Honey, tree! Tree!
00:14:21 Honey, honey.
00:14:26 - Honey.
00:14:38 Anything else you want to hit?
00:14:43 Do you want to go back?
00:14:52 You are 31 hours
00:14:55 - What's that?
00:14:57 - I call her "Lola."
00:15:00 Thank you, Lola.
00:15:01 She's accurate to within 10 feet.
00:15:03 - Go straight.
00:15:05 - Well, mall traffic. Go straight.
00:15:08 - Yeah, but she said take a right.
00:15:12 Twenty feet.
00:15:13 - Choose.
00:15:16 - Turn right.
00:15:17 - Dad!
00:15:32 My bad.
00:15:34 - You are 30 hours and 59 minutes...
00:15:37 - from your destination.
00:15:42 Say, Dad, this is interesting.
00:15:44 "Unsecured items
00:15:46 ...are a recipe for disaster."
00:15:49 No, I was too busy thinking
00:15:53 Dad, somebody's stealing the RV.
00:15:56 No, Carl. Nobody's stealing it...
00:15:58 ...it's rolling backwards
00:16:07 Oh, yeah. Well, my bad.
00:16:09 Yeah, well, yeah.
00:16:12 - Thanks, Saul.
00:16:13 - Irv.
00:16:14 I don't know where I got Saul.
00:16:17 Well, thanks.
00:16:19 - Good news.
00:16:20 Good one. No,
00:16:24 ...and charmingly amusing description,
00:16:26 - Irv.
00:16:31 ...said we damaged the parking-gear
00:16:34 We had that little mishap, you know,
00:16:37 ...we were pulling out of the driveway?
00:16:39 But the driving brakes,
00:16:42 ...they're fine.
00:16:45 All we have to do
00:16:47 ...we have to put two big blocks
00:16:50 We'll be perfect. Thanks for the help.
00:16:53 It'll be fun, let's go.
00:16:56 This is the worst
00:16:58 - Wait till you get married.
00:17:01 Everybody, let's get aboard
00:19:00 That was easy.
00:19:16 Now what do we do?
00:19:18 Hey, I know, let's go to the beach
00:19:22 Wait a minute, I forgot.
00:19:25 We're where NASA faked
00:19:29 Wait a minute.
00:19:32 Wait till you see this.
00:19:41 Hold on.
00:19:52 Wow, where are you?
00:20:01 - How cool is that?
00:20:05 Hey.
00:20:09 You guys want to see a movie?
00:20:18 Forgive my ignorance,
00:20:21 ...the Big Rolling Turd
00:20:25 Yes, I do.
00:20:47 I gotta take a crap.
00:20:52 You are so disgusting.
00:20:58 Dad! The toilet's backed up!
00:21:12 Carl, what did you eat?
00:21:15 Dad, it's not mine.
00:21:23 There's the problem,
00:21:26 And it's not even our sewage,
00:21:28 It's not a national emergency.
00:21:29 We'll go to where
00:21:31 ...and we'll dump the dump.
00:21:34 As appealing as that sounds,
00:21:37 And don't forget,
00:21:42 Sure, I'd love to clean
00:21:45 ...instead of being in Hawaii.
00:21:49 Can I come?
00:21:51 Not only can you come,
00:21:54 - Really?
00:21:55 It's gonna be a regular
00:22:18 Piece of cake.
00:22:54 - Gonna be a while, mister?
00:22:57 If I can get this hose attached
00:22:59 ...I'll be right out of here.
00:23:02 - What's the dealie?
00:23:05 Doing it.
00:23:08 - What's up?
00:23:10 - Fella here's trying to hook up a hose.
00:23:14 That there's the wrong hose.
00:23:18 - Yeah.
00:23:19 - It's got the coupling.
00:23:21 That one right there.
00:23:23 - There you go.
00:23:29 You need another hose.
00:23:32 Yeah, I guess, but...
00:23:35 It's long enough, but:
00:23:38 Gotta get one of them
00:23:40 - He hasn't got one.
00:23:43 Yeah, that'll do the trick.
00:23:45 Y-coupling?
00:23:47 A Y-coupling.
00:23:49 That's the Y. Oh, I see.
00:23:51 - One potato.
00:23:53 Two potato.
00:23:55 - Okay, wait, oh.
00:23:57 Listen,
00:24:00 ...but won't the fecal matter
00:24:05 No, you just gotta hold it
00:24:08 There you go. Little bit higher.
00:24:10 - Oh, like that there.
00:24:13 You sure this is gonna work?
00:24:15 Heck, yeah, man.
00:24:17 Okay, Archimedes.
00:24:19 Hey, Joe Joe.
00:24:23 - Okay.
00:24:36 Turn it off!
00:24:41 - That sure didn't work.
00:24:44 - We need a hose spreader.
00:24:47 Gornicke, I think. I'll get it.
00:24:48 - I'll get some music.
00:24:50 And some of those tortilla chips.
00:24:52 - We got some leftover sausages.
00:24:54 No, you folks don't need to have
00:24:57 Oh, no, no.
00:24:59 We are gonna get this
00:25:08 Sausages.
00:25:10 Sausages.
00:25:14 Sausages.
00:25:16 - Right here, you want one?
00:25:20 There we go. That'll work.
00:25:23 You sure this will hold?
00:25:25 Hey, man, why would they sell you
00:25:28 ...if you couldn't spread the hose?
00:25:30 It's getting old. Come on.
00:25:32 Open it up, Joe Joe.
00:25:40 It's blocked. I'll flush the line.
00:25:49 - Hey, Dad.
00:25:52 Maybe now is the time
00:25:54 ...your dad's not the master
00:25:57 I got that when you started
00:26:00 Yeah. All we need is a banjo.
00:26:03 Oh, man. He didn't even open it up
00:26:12 - See? No worries.
00:26:18 - Hello.
00:26:20 Hey, Todd.
00:26:23 - Where's my presentation?
00:26:26 It's the best work I've done,
00:26:29 - Yeah, you'll have it Thursday morning.
00:26:32 No, that's not soon enough.
00:26:37 Oh, I gotta go.
00:26:41 Oh, dude, that is nasty.
00:26:44 Don't worry, I'll get another hose.
00:26:47 Fire in the hole!
00:27:25 Here's where you made your
00:27:28 You listened to anything
00:27:30 Nice boys, but they're a couple pliers
00:27:34 They're not the ones covered
00:27:37 That's a good point.
00:27:41 Travis Gornicke.
00:27:46 Bob Munro.
00:27:48 Yeah, let's postpone
00:27:50 ...till we get you cleaned up.
00:28:07 You're clean enough to use
00:28:10 The vehicle's all cleaned up, Daddy.
00:28:12 - Oh, nice work, son.
00:28:14 - You're welcome.
00:28:16 - Look, can I offer you a...
00:28:20 - We're neighbors.
00:28:22 What happened to you?
00:28:25 He was covered in turd.
00:28:27 Oh, I know the feeling.
00:28:30 Mom wants to know when
00:28:32 You tell your mother when I'm good
00:28:35 - I'll tell her.
00:28:39 Well, thanks.
00:28:41 Hey,
00:28:45 - Ditto.
00:28:48 You know, aside from the stink,
00:28:51 Why don't you come on over?
00:28:53 Then afterwards, we can sit around
00:28:57 - It is funny.
00:29:00 - Yeah, we'll make a whole night of it.
00:29:04 I promised my family
00:29:06 ...shish kebob.
00:29:09 - Well, another time, then.
00:29:11 Okay.
00:29:16 Carl!
00:29:23 - Honey, how's it going?
00:29:26 Okay, well, how long?
00:29:30 Four hours.
00:29:34 - What?
00:29:37 ...and I'm having to do the potatoes
00:29:46 Hey, who wants to go to a party?
00:29:55 - Here we are. Hope we're not late.
00:29:59 - Well, Bob said we were invited.
00:30:01 - Of course you were.
00:30:03 - We're hungry.
00:30:06 - Mary Jo, our company's here.
00:30:08 The ones that are close enough
00:30:12 - Well, hi.
00:30:14 Honey, help me.
00:30:16 - I've got you here, darling.
00:30:18 Let's see. Earl and Billy you met.
00:30:20 - Hi, I'm Earl.
00:30:23 My wife, Mary Jo,
00:30:27 Hey, y'all.
00:30:34 Well, Moon, that's kind of a hippie
00:30:39 She was named after Warren Moon.
00:30:40 He was quarterback of the
00:30:44 Well, this is my wife, Jamie.
00:30:47 Cassie, my daughter.
00:30:50 Named after Karl Marx...
00:30:53 ...socialist, some would say
00:31:00 As I'm throwing up with the blood
00:31:03 ...I looked up and I said,
00:31:07 Next day, we were married
00:31:09 Nine months later... out popped Earl.
00:31:13 So you got a boyfriend?
00:31:15 - Yeah, actually, I'm engaged.
00:31:19 So where are you guys from?
00:31:21 Where do you hang your hat,
00:31:23 - Behind the wheel of that bus.
00:31:25 - Full-timer, U.S.A.
00:31:27 Well, how do Moon, Earl and not Earl
00:31:31 Home school.
00:31:33 I hope you don't find
00:31:36 ...but how do you?
00:31:39 Let's see. We made $25,000 when
00:31:43 In prison
00:31:45 Oh, and I almost forgot,
00:31:48 I mean, she earns $60,000 a year
00:31:52 Really? Hooking?
00:31:59 - Funny.
00:32:03 Y'all seen the infomercials
00:32:06 - No, I don't think we have.
00:32:08 Billy White Shoes,
00:32:10 - Watch this.
00:32:12 I love it every time.
00:32:19 Wow, that's fantastic. That was...
00:32:23 Jamie, are you
00:32:24 - Yes.
00:32:26 Let me hook you up with Happy Max.
00:32:28 I got a rep bag in the bus.
00:32:30 Plus, I represent
00:32:32 - Mary Jo's a trained cosmetologist.
00:32:36 ...I'm going to give you a complete,
00:32:39 A $39 package absolutely free.
00:32:42 - Oh, that would be good, honey.
00:32:44 You know what, I'm gonna work on you
00:32:49 - There you go, little lady.
00:32:52 I heard you talking.
00:32:54 - There ain't no meat in it.
00:32:57 You here that? No meat.
00:32:59 That's right. It's all organs.
00:33:03 Deer organs. They're fresh too.
00:33:04 I run him over this morning.
00:33:08 But the stomach, brains and pancreas,
00:33:11 ...because in this heat,
00:33:13 - Bathroom.
00:33:27 - There's my girl.
00:33:29 Yes. You know,
00:33:31 This has been great. A lot of fun.
00:33:34 Dad, listen.
00:33:38 This is kind of our family theme song.
00:33:40 Kids, come on. Get up there, go, go.
00:33:44 Oh, they're gonna love this.
00:33:46 Little Mommy's got a whole
00:33:49 - Oh, that's wonderful.
00:33:51 - Here I go. Thank you, darling.
00:33:53 - Oh, yeah.
00:34:59 I never grow tired of that song.
00:35:03 ...in a field with a road flare.
00:35:05 Yes. Big travel day tomorrow.
00:35:07 - Where y'all headed?
00:35:08 Mount Watson in Colorado.
00:35:11 - Just fantastic to have met you both.
00:35:14 - Hope we see you again.
00:35:16 - Bagels and deer testicles?
00:35:23 We'd have breakfast,
00:35:25 - Well, us too. Six a.m. work for you?
00:35:28 Yeah, trust us.
00:35:35 Bob? Bob?
00:35:37 - Let's go, let's go. Bob?
00:35:40 - Oh, friendly folks.
00:36:45 - Hi, Mr. Munro.
00:36:50 - You sure got a nice one.
00:36:53 That's a nice laptop.
00:36:55 Oh, thanks. What are you doing up?
00:36:59 I have a sleep disorder.
00:37:03 So you just wander around
00:37:05 Yeah, I don't really mind.
00:37:10 Well, see you.
00:37:37 Oh, okay.
00:38:15 - Morning.
00:38:33 - Come on. Come on, let's go.
00:38:35 The Gornickes.
00:38:38 Bob, a little help.
00:38:41 Little help? Cassie?
00:38:43 There's movement.
00:38:47 Carl, let's get going.
00:38:52 Let's move it, let's move it.
00:38:57 Carl. Cass, what's our status?
00:38:59 She's out the door. She's coming.
00:39:04 Come on. Let's go, let's go.
00:39:10 - Come on!
00:39:14 - The wheel!
00:39:19 Hurry, Mom, she's coming!
00:39:33 Come on, come on, come on.
00:39:36 Will you move this son of a bi...
00:39:44 Hey!
00:40:02 They are early risers.
00:40:24 I'm going a whole 12 miles an hour.
00:40:27 Then pass him.
00:40:35 Kids, leave him alone.
00:40:42 Really.
00:40:49 Oh, dear. Oh, dear.
00:40:57 - Come on.
00:41:00 Bob. Bob. Bob.
00:41:07 Bob.
00:41:17 All right.
00:41:19 - Okay. All right.
00:41:23 - Hey, guess what.
00:41:25 We need gas.
00:41:28 And I really have to go
00:41:30 You know we have one of those.
00:41:31 Yeah, but after my last little
00:41:34 Okay, okay, do what you have to do.
00:41:37 I've got an ICBM coming.
00:41:42 If there's a poop fairy,
00:42:16 I could be a while, baby.
00:42:34 Dad, you in here?
00:42:36 Carl, I just need a minute.
00:42:38 Sure, only the RV's rolling away.
00:42:41 Be right out.
00:42:50 - Hey, Bob.
00:42:52 Yeah, I think you've got
00:42:56 I'm no expert...
00:42:57 ...but it's your parking-gear
00:43:00 - How did you?
00:43:02 We pulled in
00:43:05 Isn't that something?
00:43:07 ...Jesus saved us from a tornado?
00:43:09 I'd love to,
00:43:12 ...taking care of business
00:43:14 ...but Jamie would love to hear it.
00:43:17 Well, it seems just like yesterday.
00:43:51 Thank you.
00:43:54 I don't wanna get too big,
00:43:57 - I mean, I don't want to look freakish.
00:44:06 - What is this?
00:44:08 ...between here and Colorado
00:44:11 - I got it last night off the Internet.
00:44:16 - What are you listening to?
00:44:19 So Billy was blown
00:44:21 Right before he hit the ground,
00:44:24 ...comes this queen-size
00:44:26 ...slides right under him
00:44:28 Saved his life.
00:44:30 I have a bad back.
00:44:32 So you folks wanna join us
00:44:35 - We...
00:44:36 Mr. Munro,
00:44:39 ...about that neat laptop
00:44:41 - When were you using a laptop?
00:44:43 - I was just telling him...
00:44:46 You know,
00:44:51 - Somebody's ripe.
00:44:55 You guys go on in, get that table.
00:44:58 All right. Come on, kids.
00:45:05 - We're ditching them?
00:45:07 - Okay.
00:45:11 So because you told them
00:45:14 ...we had to get up at 5:30...
00:45:16 ...to avoid the Gornickes...
00:45:18 ...which we managed not to do
00:45:19 ...because you refused to use the
00:45:23 You're determined
00:45:26 We all are, Dad.
00:45:28 Not me. I embrace every challenge.
00:45:42 Honey, maybe they just got
00:45:45 You're a sweet woman, Mary Jo.
00:45:48 But them folks ditched us.
00:45:54 Oh, Trav, honey, pull over.
00:45:57 He looks like a folk singer.
00:46:01 - Climb aboard.
00:46:02 - How you doing, buddy?
00:46:04 Welcome to the Gornicke bus.
00:46:06 You a folk singer?
00:46:31 Cass,
00:46:33 I am so bored.
00:46:35 I could actually throw up
00:46:37 I brought games.
00:46:41 - Come on, it'll be fun.
00:46:44 Did you turn on the oven?
00:46:45 - No.
00:46:54 - Raccoon in the oven!
00:46:56 Don't open it.
00:47:02 Did you take out the roast
00:47:05 - I guess not.
00:47:07 Give him Carl. Maybe he'll eat him.
00:47:08 Give him you.
00:47:10 - Good one.
00:47:12 Hey, come on. Don't you see
00:47:15 He's playing head games.
00:47:18 We have to hang together,
00:47:19 - Just get rid of it.
00:47:22 - Yeah.
00:47:29 Come on, Blue.
00:47:30 - Come on, boy.
00:47:32 - Go get him, boy.
00:47:46 Just kidding.
00:47:48 I'm going in.
00:47:52 Is anyone gonna stop me?
00:47:53 "Dad, don't.
00:47:56 Nothing? Not a word?
00:47:58 Not really.
00:48:03 - Daddy?
00:48:06 Don't hurt him.
00:48:15 I am entering the RV.
00:48:21 Still no sign.
00:48:23 I'm going towards the oven door.
00:48:27 I'm opening the ov...
00:48:30 Oh, my God!
00:48:34 There's more than one!
00:48:38 You guys, he's just joking around.
00:48:49 Get back.
00:48:51 Back. Back! Back!
00:48:53 You hideous...
00:48:59 We need a new plan.
00:49:26 All right, let's go.
00:49:29 I didn't steal it. I found it.
00:49:31 Well, now you lost it.
00:49:38 That's why they didn't
00:49:40 He lost his computer, he needs it.
00:49:44 I was quick to think the worst.
00:49:46 I'm filled with chagrin.
00:49:49 Oh, honey.
00:49:52 - What is that?
00:49:54 Got it from the guy in the office.
00:49:57 I can get this for five bucks online,
00:49:59 You're gonna set that off in the RV?
00:50:01 He assured me it's not toxic.
00:50:06 Don't litter.
00:50:11 Suck on this, Rocky.
00:50:20 Yeah!
00:50:23 Run, critters.
00:50:25 Yeah, there's more where
00:50:28 Yeah!
00:50:31 I'm not so ill-equipped to handle an
00:50:35 - No one said you were ill-equipped.
00:50:38 How long does this last?
00:50:41 Up to six hours.
00:50:45 It's a beautiful evening.
00:50:54 Why don't we huddle
00:50:56 Oh, we can't.
00:51:00 Well, why don't we just
00:51:02 Oh, that's right.
00:51:05 - Please, try the office again.
00:51:09 He won't let us in.
00:51:13 What about that bar
00:51:16 - Yeah, Dad, pizza.
00:51:19 No, it's dark out there. Besides,
00:51:29 Hey! I can see it.
00:51:34 Come on, I'm starving.
00:51:36 - Bob?
00:51:38 It's just down the...
00:51:43 Carl!
00:51:46 Carl, we're coming!
00:51:52 Bob!
00:51:53 Mom!
00:51:58 Jamie!
00:00:06 Bob!
00:00:35 Table for four. No smoking.
00:00:38 Wipe your feet.
00:00:45 See? That's why you should study.
00:00:47 So you can get good grades
00:00:51 Hey, Dad, how come you never
00:00:53 Because of the generalissimo
00:00:56 We had one before you were born,
00:00:58 ...but then you get a job,
00:01:01 ...you have a family...
00:01:03 It was fun. But then something
00:01:06 We got the George Foreman
00:01:09 Okay.
00:01:18 It's fine. Let's just go to sleep.
00:01:22 Dad.
00:03:18 Do you want me to drive?
00:03:26 - You okay, Dad?
00:03:48 Oh, yeah.
00:03:54 Oh, great, you're up.
00:03:57 Dad, emergency!
00:03:58 - Love to.
00:04:02 Gornickes.
00:04:03 I'll get their computer.
00:04:05 I feel like that hitchhiker
00:04:08 What do they like about us?
00:04:10 I'm not gonna spend my life...
00:04:12 ...going door to door,
00:04:14 - The Gornickes. I'll flag them down.
00:04:20 She got him.
00:04:23 Munros!
00:04:26 Munros!
00:04:28 Bob! Jamie!
00:04:29 It's the Gornickes.
00:04:32 - Pretend to talk to me.
00:04:34 Pull over! We've got your stuff!
00:04:36 Munros. It's the Gornickes.
00:04:42 Pull over. We have your computer.
00:04:47 And a Happy Max bag.
00:04:51 Kids, grab your paint guns.
00:04:53 Pull ahead.
00:04:55 You know, seeing you drive this thing
00:05:00 What?
00:05:01 They've got guns!
00:05:05 We've also got...
00:05:13 You can come up now.
00:05:15 Where did you learn
00:05:17 How do you think
00:05:22 What a shame. If we had their address,
00:05:26 Well, we do know
00:05:28 Mount Watson, Colorado.
00:05:45 You know,
00:05:47 ...you wouldn't look like a 10-year-old.
00:05:56 Oh, sweet.
00:05:57 You say something, Frodo?
00:06:01 I was just saying
00:06:03 - We got two-on-two, right?
00:06:06 ...an under-2-foot league.
00:06:07 Why don't you trade that thing in
00:06:12 I'm gonna floss your rear.
00:06:16 - Let's go, bring it. Come on.
00:06:19 - What's tripping in the wood?
00:06:21 - Don't call...
00:06:23 This my man, C.
00:06:26 But you dogs, you're hardcore.
00:06:28 - Scottsdale.
00:06:32 That's a hardcore 'hood.
00:06:34 But you want to take on
00:06:36 ...go ahead, because, you know...
00:06:38 ...he's fierce,
00:06:40 ...he'll damage you.
00:06:43 But I say talk to the hand, call waiting,
00:06:46 I can't restrains him. Because
00:06:49 ...to give him a chance to cool down,
00:06:53 ...as we were. Because we could be
00:06:55 Not just on this mobile home thing,
00:06:58 ...and Westwood, you know.
00:07:00 Malling it, like we all can.
00:07:03 Pimp my Mercedes, call me back...
00:07:05 ...put you on hold.
00:07:09 We gotta go.
00:07:11 You better, man. Don't make me
00:07:14 Aren't you glad Dad came?
00:07:17 Carl.
00:07:21 Carl.
00:07:23 It occurs to me that you and I
00:07:25 ...7th Heaven kind of dialogues
00:07:28 - You're busy a lot.
00:07:31 ...that you are sensitive
00:07:34 I'll bet you $1000 right now
00:07:37 I've seen pictures of you when you
00:07:40 - You were shaving already.
00:07:44 See, I achieved maturity very early.
00:07:46 I stopped growing
00:07:48 But you have the other body type.
00:07:51 When he was 16,
00:07:55 How do you mean that?
00:07:56 He grew very tall, very quickly,
00:07:59 And you're being proactive.
00:08:02 And when you grow up big,
00:08:04 What?
00:08:06 We'll enter father-son
00:08:08 - All right.
00:08:11 But we'll get them high,
00:08:18 Coming at you a little heat right now.
00:08:20 Give me a little heat there.
00:08:24 Hike! All right.
00:08:32 What's up?
00:08:36 Kids, dinner's gonna be a little late
00:08:40 Sorry. False alarm.
00:08:45 - The buzzing is not me.
00:08:50 - Hello.
00:08:52 ...we need to talk.
00:08:53 I'm sorry, I can't hear you very well.
00:08:55 Signal. No, no. Yeah.
00:08:58 Hold on one second. The signal.
00:09:00 Just a... Can you hear me now?
00:09:04 - Hey, Todd. Did you get the proposal?
00:09:07 My Laird didn't like it very much.
00:09:09 - Who cares what Laird thinks.
00:09:12 We'll talk about it tonight
00:09:14 - No.
00:09:15 I flew in last night. It's a mile high here
00:09:19 You don't wanna have a nose bleed
00:09:22 Could be a little embarrassing.
00:09:23 So I'll see you there. Here.
00:09:35 Mom, he's suffering.
00:09:37 Honey, can I help?
00:09:39 No, honey.
00:09:42 Boy, I'm just gonna try
00:09:45 Don't use bark.
00:09:47 These are great.
00:09:49 Yeah, there it is. That does the trick.
00:09:52 Ferns. Nature's broom.
00:09:55 Honey, no. You can't go on like this.
00:09:58 No,
00:10:00 - You won't. We'll go tomorrow.
00:10:03 Tomorrow we go to the lake.
00:10:05 Listen, I'll stay here. You go on.
00:10:07 - I don't know...
00:10:12 Guys?
00:10:14 Come on, kids.
00:10:15 Yeah? Okay.
00:10:18 Good.
00:10:21 I'll try and make it back to the RV.
00:10:23 I'm okay. Got my ferns.
00:10:26 Okay. I'm okay.
00:10:28 Go on. Go on, you guys.
00:10:56 Welcome to the RoadMate 700.
00:10:58 Hi, Lola. My wife's not here.
00:11:32 - The hell are you driving?
00:11:35 You know, we should go over... Laird.
00:11:38 Yeah, I decided
00:11:40 - But hang around, tell a few jokes.
00:11:52 Hi there.
00:11:53 - Larry Moiphine.
00:11:56 - Cute dog.
00:11:58 Oh, yeah, who's a good girl?
00:12:01 - Todd?
00:12:02 - Bob.
00:12:04 - Laird.
00:12:05 Larry. Laird.
00:12:07 So, fellas, we'll have a little nosh
00:12:10 - Tammy's not here yet. Our assistant.
00:12:13 - Come on.
00:12:26 Oh, hi. Hi. Sorry I'm late.
00:12:29 You guys have all just got to see
00:12:32 - It's good, huh?
00:12:33 Wow, so...
00:12:35 Oh, of course. I believe you folks
00:12:40 - Yes. Laird.
00:12:51 In 1985, Pure Vibe soda completed
00:12:56 ...of Mr. Twinkle Iced Tea.
00:12:59 ...an estimated $91 million.
00:13:02 And that was with a profit definition
00:13:05 ...as the one Pure Vibe is offering...
00:13:08 ...Alpine Soda.
00:13:11 Sorry, is this just gonna be
00:13:13 No, it's... Stocks.
00:13:15 Other than money,
00:13:18 ...family-oriented business to become
00:13:22 Yeah. Other than money?
00:13:25 - Right.
00:13:27 Garry, Larry.
00:13:30 Fifty years ago, if you walked down
00:13:33 ...on a warm Monday night...
00:13:37 - you'd hear I Love Lucy coming out
00:13:41 I'm not speaking about conformity,
00:13:45 And every once in a while...
00:13:46 ...America falls in love with something
00:13:48 That could happen here.
00:13:51 Money aside, how'd
00:13:54 ...every time he walked by a park
00:13:56 ...throwing a Frisbee and the dog
00:13:59 If Pure Vibe takes Alpine national,
00:14:02 ...to let America fall in love
00:14:07 What's your hurry? Why don't
00:14:10 I gotta get the RV back right now,
00:14:12 ...or I have to pay for a full day.
00:14:15 - Well, just picture me hugging you.
00:14:29 Officer? Excuse me.
00:14:32 Landslide.
00:14:34 I-70? It'll take hours. Isn't there
00:14:38 Diablo Pass. But you're not
00:15:30 Dad was right.
00:15:33 Yeah. Poor Dad.
00:15:36 Should we cut this short
00:15:38 - Yeah.
00:15:43 You are not on any marked road.
00:15:45 I know that, Lola.
00:15:46 Make a U-turn
00:15:49 I can't.
00:16:03 Squeeze them cheeks
00:16:05 Come on now
00:16:07 Big old rolling turd coming through
00:16:19 - You are not on any marked road.
00:16:37 Come on, Turd. Keep rolling.
00:16:40 You can do it.
00:16:43 Come on.
00:16:47 Come on. Come on. Come on.
00:17:13 Damn it.
00:18:59 Make a U-turn
00:19:04 Dad's gonna be surprised
00:19:06 Yeah.
00:19:22 Who was that maniac?
00:19:49 Oh, God.
00:19:51 Bob?
00:19:54 - Jamie.
00:19:58 Honey,
00:20:02 I need...
00:20:05 Needed a...
00:20:09 Needed a little fresh air.
00:20:13 After my incident.
00:20:15 And how are you now?
00:20:17 Good.
00:20:20 Really good. Good.
00:20:22 Oh, yeah.
00:20:28 - Hello?
00:20:31 - Yeah?
00:20:34 Larry wants you
00:20:36 ...and pitch the whole company,
00:20:38 Majority want the merger,
00:20:40 - What?
00:20:42 I can do this. Give me another chance.
00:20:45 - I'll do it. I'm there.
00:20:55 Big old rolling turd coming through
00:20:58 Oh, we're on that road
00:21:02 Big old rolling turd coming through
00:21:06 Big old rolling turd
00:21:16 Hey, Dad. Maybe we can go
00:21:19 - I'd love to go to Yellowstone.
00:21:23 Absolutely.
00:21:25 Come on. I wanna show you
00:21:33 It's hard to forget this place.
00:21:36 My dad was so moved by it
00:21:38 "You know, a snack stand up here
00:21:41 My mom, always supportive:
00:21:45 My dad: "Why don't you blow it out
00:21:50 Can't buy memories like that.
00:21:52 Or like this.
00:21:54 Hey. You know, I should take the RV
00:21:58 ...before we head to L.A.
00:22:00 And you guys don't want
00:22:03 You wait here by the lake,
00:22:05 I'll drive to Boulder, be back
00:22:09 - How about that?
00:22:11 Guys? Tell your dad
00:22:16 - Thank you for taking us on this trip.
00:22:19 - Better than Hawaii?
00:22:24 Come give big daddy a hug.
00:22:26 - Wait.
00:22:29 - Dad.
00:22:30 - Dad!
00:22:32 The RV's rolling away.
00:22:37 No!
00:22:38 Oh, God, no.
00:22:40 - Oh, no!
00:22:43 Bob. Bob!
00:22:47 - Bob!
00:22:51 Bob, no!
00:22:58 Go.
00:23:00 Are you crazy? It's a rental.
00:23:05 - How am I gonna get to the meeting?
00:23:08 The Alpine merger.
00:23:11 Sweetheart, you'll never guess
00:23:14 - You weren't really sick.
00:23:16 This is about work.
00:23:18 You brought us out here because
00:23:21 - You're getting warmer.
00:23:24 - Bingo.
00:23:27 ...from the very beginning.
00:23:30 No, since when you
00:23:34 - That time, yeah.
00:23:36 ...with you wanting to be
00:23:38 - So you just used us?
00:23:40 Oh, I don't know, she's pretty smart.
00:23:42 Why don't you explain it to her.
00:23:45 Kids...
00:23:46 ...life is hard.
00:23:48 Not "The TiVo in my room
00:23:50 But "making a living because you're
00:23:54 You know what it's like to be 50,
00:23:56 ...to bury your career...
00:23:58 All right, that's a little rough.
00:24:00 Cassie,
00:24:02 Stanford.
00:24:04 Carl, where's that camp you're going?
00:24:06 - Alaska.
00:24:08 And you, how much do you think
00:24:11 Who has to ride a $4000 bicycle?
00:24:14 I have to ride a custom bike
00:24:17 Are you happy? Now the kids know
00:24:20 Listen, I have to get to that meeting,
00:24:24 Let's pull it up two-by-two,
00:24:26 - Carl. Come with me.
00:24:30 Cassie?
00:25:29 I'm gonna lose my job. I hope the kids
00:25:37 You know what's scary
00:25:40 Mom, there's never going to be
00:25:49 Oh, my God.
00:25:56 - Where's your husband?
00:25:58 Could you possibly
00:26:01 What's all this?
00:26:02 Oh, I gotta study
00:26:05 Oh, like some sort of
00:26:09 College.
00:26:12 - How old are you?
00:26:15 Moon, though,
00:26:18 So...
00:26:20 ...you guys are smart.
00:26:24 Gonna be unemployed.
00:26:26 I'm gonna have to sell my liver
00:26:29 And then he just
00:26:32 Yup. This one really snuck up
00:26:36 I thought Bob was good people.
00:26:38 - Does anybody have a vomit bag?
00:26:40 Big time.
00:26:43 What?
00:26:44 Don't worry.
00:26:46 Boy don't know
00:26:48 - Like father, like son.
00:26:51 Listen, I have to admit something.
00:26:53 Bob wasn't the only one
00:26:57 I don't mean to shock you, but we
00:27:00 Well, it was you,
00:27:02 You didn't exactly catch
00:27:05 Yeah, see, I had a feeling
00:27:07 Yeah, here's the thing.
00:27:09 You start off happy and stupid.
00:27:12 Then you become associates
00:27:15 "Did the plumber come?"
00:27:17 "I'll pick up your dad
00:27:19 Until you don't remember what
00:27:22 You know what I mean?
00:27:25 No, I don't. I... No.
00:27:27 No.
00:27:29 Okay.
00:27:31 Anyway, in the last few days,
00:27:36 And I was happy.
00:27:40 I better get directions...
00:27:41 ...so I can take you folks
00:28:06 Oh, really?
00:28:11 Jamie!
00:28:14 Cassie! Carl!
00:28:17 Come on, let's hit the road, Jamie.
00:28:21 Okay.
00:28:25 Oh, God.
00:28:33 - Ladies first.
00:29:01 Stop!
00:29:04 Oh, Munro!
00:29:06 The hike was so intense...
00:29:07 ...there was a few parts where
00:29:10 I think I might have pulled a muscle.
00:29:13 - Where?
00:29:19 Travis!
00:30:13 Jamie.
00:30:17 Bob?
00:30:23 Are you an idiot? Do you want
00:30:26 ...bouncing down the highway?
00:30:27 Why are you with
00:30:29 - What are you doing on the bus?
00:30:32 You win. I blew off my job because
00:30:36 I never asked you to blow off your job.
00:30:39 Honest. Like, "Todd's gonna fire me
00:30:42 - "Screw Hawaii" honest?
00:30:46 You think that if you told me
00:30:48 ...and your job was in jeopardy,
00:30:52 No crying, that's cheating.
00:30:53 Do you think I'm some horrible witch
00:30:56 I care a lot.
00:30:58 In fact, I hate you. Jerk.
00:31:02 I didn't want you to know
00:31:06 You and Cassie and Carl,
00:31:09 What you think about me is the
00:31:14 I didn't want to fail.
00:31:18 If you don't know how I feel about you
00:31:22 ...then I must be a failure as a wife.
00:31:25 Then you admit you're the problem.
00:31:30 Bob.
00:31:38 You mean more to me
00:31:42 That's good, because we won't be
00:31:45 I missed that meeting.
00:31:46 No, you didn't.
00:31:50 Come on, Bob. Come here.
00:32:05 It's a Christmas miracle.
00:32:08 No, it just sounded like this was
00:32:10 So I brought her.
00:32:13 Travis has never been one
00:32:17 Travis...
00:32:18 ...some of my behavior on this trip
00:32:23 Did come off a tad abrasive.
00:32:26 I was wrong, and it takes
00:32:28 And you're a big man.
00:32:30 - I don't just mean...
00:32:33 See, I went to Stanford.
00:32:37 You big lug, I love you!
00:32:40 Who loves his big lug?
00:32:42 - I love you, you big...
00:32:44 - Todd.
00:32:47 Showing up at
00:32:50 You look horrible. Let's go.
00:32:58 Dad.
00:33:00 - I'm sorry.
00:33:01 I guess you're under a lot of pressure
00:33:05 And in your own nerdy way
00:33:09 - Bob?
00:33:11 I'm hating this.
00:33:16 - Dad.
00:33:17 - I get it.
00:33:19 Sometimes if you wanna succeed,
00:33:28 - You...
00:33:34 This is the big one, Bobcat.
00:33:36 - Bases loaded.
00:33:38 You hit a grand slam on this,
00:33:41 ...and I personally push Laird
00:33:43 Everybody, this is Bob.
00:33:47 Hi, everybody. Sorry I'm late...
00:33:50 ...I just came down that mountain,
00:33:54 I guess you guys didn't get the memo
00:33:58 I love your wilderness so much,
00:34:03 Easy, Todd.
00:34:05 It's been kind of a wild journey
00:34:07 If you ever wanna really find out
00:34:10 ...put your family in an RV and drive.
00:34:12 I've seen some amazing stuff.
00:34:14 I've fought wild raccoons and won.
00:34:18 ...where it's not the end of the world,
00:34:21 And I met this weird family.
00:34:23 I mean, boy, they were strange.
00:34:26 You know, whenever a big white man
00:34:30 In the dictionary, under "hootenanny,"
00:34:33 But you know
00:34:36 They're just honest, good people, and
00:34:44 Garry, Larry...
00:34:45 ...this is a nice company
00:34:48 I bet at the birth of your baby
00:34:51 Excited, but scared. You didn't
00:34:54 And next thing you know,
00:34:57 ...and you're trying to raise it. You
00:35:00 ...but you pretended like you did.
00:35:02 And next thing you know,
00:35:05 It's bigger, older. More complicated.
00:35:09 Difficult to deal with.
00:35:11 But here's the deal...
00:35:13 ...you care about it just as much,
00:35:17 ...and part of you is in it,
00:35:21 You love it more than ever.
00:35:28 And right now,
00:35:30 ...of whether you wanna merge
00:35:34 Your stocks are gonna split.
00:35:36 ...you won't know what to do with.
00:35:39 You'll be bigger than a woman
00:35:43 You'll be able to get all that stuff,
00:35:46 ...maybe even a Barcalounger...
00:35:48 ...that massages your ass
00:35:51 Bottom line here, Garry, Larry.
00:35:52 If you wanna merge
00:35:56 ...I promise you, you're making
00:36:01 This guy is a disgruntled employee.
00:36:04 Couldn't keep up with younger talent.
00:36:08 Finished. His own daughter
00:36:10 I did not. It was my friend,
00:36:13 ...has one of the worst
00:36:17 Why are these kids here?
00:36:18 Plus, last year you guys outsourced
00:36:23 Let her go, Todd.
00:36:24 I'll let her go. I'll let you go.
00:36:27 You're fired.
00:36:33 Yo, dog.
00:36:35 - Carl.
00:36:42 Todd, I quit.
00:37:09 Honey,
00:37:11 Babe, it's left over from last winter.
00:37:14 ...it doesn't melt. It's glacial.
00:37:16 - We don't have chains.
00:37:18 They're for the winter, not July.
00:37:20 Well, I see snow.
00:37:22 Hey, Dad, are we poor?
00:37:24 Carl, there's a lot of ways
00:37:27 - I think love...
00:37:29 - We're dirt poor.
00:37:31 We could all live
00:37:33 We'll spend every minute together,
00:37:36 - That just sounds fantastic.
00:37:43 - Chains. Four-wheel drive.
00:37:47 Officer, good day. I know what you're
00:37:50 Well, sir, this is no ordinary RV.
00:37:53 It's part ATV, part SUV,
00:37:56 It's got positraction, Dynaflow,
00:38:00 It's got heated rims.
00:38:05 Okay.
00:38:07 License and registration, sir.
00:38:18 Oh, there it is.
00:38:23 I believe that was
00:38:26 We had a little bit
00:38:28 I lost my wallet.
00:38:32 We got him.
00:38:35 Got me?
00:38:37 Officer, I know she may look unsafe,
00:38:40 She likes to be rode hard
00:38:42 Spent two days in the lake.
00:38:45 It means a lot.
00:38:47 It's like a big, ugly pet, really.
00:38:49 You got him. Thanks, Sam.
00:38:52 - We owe you one.
00:38:54 I just took one soda.
00:38:56 No, we just want you to know
00:38:59 - Well, good luck.
00:39:01 We want you to join us
00:39:04 - You're offering me a job?
00:39:07 - Yes, he'll take it.
00:39:10 You just really seem to get us,
00:39:13 - Dad, you forgot something.
00:39:15 ...don't interrupt daddy's new bosses.