Recep Ivedik

en
00:00:13 Recep ivedik.
00:00:16 Tell me, why do you avoid
00:00:20 Plus, you got out of the car
00:00:23 Sir, I'm a young man.
00:00:25 That night when I saw...
00:00:27 ...something white approaching
00:00:30 ...and someone commanded
00:00:31 Allright. Cut it out, you loofe.
00:00:33 Take your things and get lost.
00:00:35 Don't you ever show your
00:00:39 Yes, sir.
00:00:41 - Hi. Are you the safe
00:00:45 The police chief sent me.
00:00:52 Mobile phone. Belt.
00:00:55 Window crank.
00:00:58 - What's this?
00:01:01 They have emotional value
00:01:20 - Uncle, please buy one.
00:01:23 - why do you frighten me?
00:01:25 Got no money.
00:01:27 - Please, buy one.
00:01:32 Hey! Dude!
00:01:37 Hey!
00:01:46 Hold it there.
00:01:48 - I found it.
00:01:50 What are you gonna do with it?
00:01:52 You don't pay any rent and tax.
00:01:53 What are you going to do?
00:01:56 Piss off!
00:01:58 Fuck off!
00:02:04 Dear viewers,
00:02:06 ...from the beaches
00:02:08 The beaches are full with
00:02:13 Salih! Put two beers
00:02:17 I'll take them
00:02:18 I'll take them here.
00:02:20 Get inside, you drunkard.
00:02:22 Listen to me, woman.
00:02:25 You know what happened last time
00:02:28 Don't piss me off.
00:02:29 It's just two beers.
00:02:31 - Scum!
00:02:33 Redneck! Orangutan!
00:02:35 Antalya is swarming with Russians.
00:02:37 Well well well.
00:02:41 ...then I swear I'm an animal.
00:02:44 We're with Mr Muhsin, the owner
00:02:48 Being the highest tax payer
00:02:51 Being record holder is
00:02:54 I owe this success to being fair,
00:03:00 There are very important
00:03:03 Being fair, loyal and most
00:03:08 When you're honest, all doors
00:03:13 Well put! Bravo!
00:03:16 I swear, you and I
00:03:18 I'll bring you this myself.
00:03:20 I'll do anything for you.
00:03:23 Bravo! Salih, fix me
00:05:24 Hi. I thought you have some
00:05:27 - Am I right?
00:05:30 Suddenly the engine stopped.
00:05:32 We don't know anything
00:05:34 Could you take a look at it?
00:05:37 I have to ask some questions
00:05:41 Where did it break down exactly?
00:05:43 How fast does it accelerate
00:05:45 Are the rims aluminum
00:05:47 Seats fabric,
00:05:49 Does the car have
00:05:52 I should know to apply
00:05:55 Can you tell me all the
00:05:59 What has that
00:06:01 Shaddup!
00:06:03 Shaddup!
00:06:04 If you're that knowledgeable,
00:06:06 ...instead of fluttering here
00:06:09 Beat it! Buzz off!
00:06:12 Start the engine.
00:06:13 Get in and start the engine.
00:06:14 Step back! Step back!
00:06:17 I don't trust you at all.
00:06:20 You're sneaky.
00:06:22 Start the engine.
00:06:24 I am!
00:06:25 Come on, start.
00:06:28 Could the battery be dead?
00:06:31 Get back in and don't
00:06:43 It's the battery.
00:06:46 Don't panic. I have a battery.
00:06:48 I'll give you that one.
00:07:03 Start the engine now.
00:07:07 Don't keep the car in gear!
00:07:10 Why are you driving me nuts?
00:07:13 Back off!
00:07:15 Never keep the car in gear!
00:07:17 You don't ever know the value!
00:07:20 Allright, anyone can make mistakes.
00:07:21 I'm Ok.
00:07:25 It worked.
00:07:33 Oh, my sweety.
00:07:44 That electric look in your eyes
00:07:47 Buzz off.
00:07:48 Of you go.
00:07:54 Have a nice trip, sweeties.
00:08:01 Clear!
00:08:07 God, damn it.
00:08:27 Tozkoparan Road Service.
00:08:28 How can I be of help.
00:08:30 - Hello, road service.
00:08:33 I gave my battery to
00:08:38 They left. And what luck,
00:08:42 If you have given your battery
00:08:47 What do you mean
00:08:51 Does this car not run on gas?
00:08:54 Is this an electric car?
00:08:55 - What a shitty car is this?
00:08:58 Listen. Are you recording this
00:09:05 Then damn all the technical staff
00:10:10 I'll knock your head in.
00:10:11 Chill out. What's up?
00:10:13 Hi. My car broke down.
00:10:16 Where are you guys heading for?
00:10:17 - We're off to Isparta.
00:10:21 - Let's off together.
00:10:44 Yo twin jerks.
00:10:47 Laugh at your own asses.
00:10:50 Why do you laugh?
00:10:52 What's wrong with you?
00:10:54 Don't you have parents?
00:10:57 It stinks like a stable,
00:11:00 Did you eat sheep, nibble
00:11:03 I'm traveling to Antalya
00:11:07 This is absurd, outrageous!
00:11:09 Your asses are all
00:11:12 Open a window!
00:11:13 It stinks like between the legs here!
00:11:15 Why on earth did I join you?
00:11:17 Why... Can I ask
00:11:22 Why do you stare?
00:11:25 What's up?
00:11:28 Why do you stare?
00:11:52 Folks... I also like that guy...
00:11:56 ...who walks on Taksim Square.
00:11:59 ...walks around like me.
00:12:01 His lifestyle is just like mine.
00:12:04 I saw someone servicing your
00:12:07 You wouldn't sink
00:12:09 - Why, am I the Titanic?
00:12:13 Do you dig my sense of humor?
00:12:16 For example, that light there...
00:12:21 I watch Discovery Channel.
00:12:23 There's that pervert.
00:12:26 Looks around like that.
00:12:27 The skinny one, with bulging eyes
00:12:30 Everyone looks the other way
00:12:35 Got it?
00:12:37 Was like a movie.
00:12:38 I didn't understand the animals.
00:12:42 I tried to understand myself
00:12:45 That dude is a mile high.
00:12:48 Guys, I'm starting to feel hunger
00:12:52 - Do you have the same?
00:12:54 Got any chocolate?
00:12:57 Look around a little,
00:13:01 Yes or no?
00:13:06 Let's stop somewhere
00:13:25 They are hilarious.
00:13:27 I've never seen such a bunch
00:13:58 - Hello, brothers.
00:14:01 You got any chocolate?
00:14:02 No. We got beans.
00:14:05 I could eat even you,
00:14:08 Get some beans.
00:14:16 What is that?
00:14:29 Not so fast, mate.
00:14:31 Are you a member of the
00:14:35 Karaambar?
00:14:38 I'm not. So what?
00:14:39 - Then you can't eat those beans.
00:14:42 Only our members can take
00:14:47 I'm not taking benefit of anything.
00:14:50 Serving beans is the most important
00:14:54 Jeez, I've never seen
00:14:58 I want to be a member too.
00:15:01 Prepare the backside. I'm going
00:15:05 Watch out or a new member
00:15:18 Behold, two valiant stepped up
00:15:20 Both are equally renowned.
00:15:22 Come on, wrestlers.
00:15:26 Wheels roll with
00:15:28 ...surely shall win,
00:15:47 Recep leads by one.
00:16:52 Now that we have a draw.
00:16:54 It's time for the final crawl.
00:17:10 Recep, now take your chance.
00:17:11 Blow over the bottle
00:17:41 Here you are, brother Recep.
00:17:43 From now on you can always
00:17:54 God bless you, chief.
00:17:56 Next week we're opening a gym
00:17:59 Don't forget my movie house.
00:18:02 We'll do that too. Next year.
00:18:05 Bravo.
00:18:12 I've got a long way to go.
00:18:16 I'm going that way.
00:18:19 It will be a pleasure.
00:18:28 Life fucks!
00:18:30 - Brakes are for wimps!
00:18:33 I only complete with the airlines.
00:18:36 Long live, brother Recep.
00:18:39 Roads end, sorrow prevails.
00:18:46 If I say I'll be back
00:18:56 Thank you, bro.
00:18:58 Otherwise I'd end up stranded here.
00:19:00 There are all kinds of bastards
00:19:04 ...killers, perverts.
00:19:07 I'm glad you joined me.
00:19:10 It's hard being alone.
00:19:11 I'm glad too if it's fine for you.
00:19:16 - Are you single?
00:19:20 I'm single too.
00:19:22 We share the same faith, huh?
00:19:25 You know, no woman is
00:19:30 You got a point.
00:19:34 They don't like me. I never met
00:19:39 If I were a woman, I'd let you
00:19:46 I'd let you take me too.
00:19:51 If I were a women
00:20:07 Usually you'd find women
00:20:09 ...but you have all black males.
00:20:12 Are you into body building?
00:20:14 No, I'm into body builders.
00:20:20 They're so wet, hot...
00:20:25 ...all sweaty.
00:20:28 Screw you, don't piss me off.
00:20:30 - Pull over!
00:20:33 I'll stick that gear lever
00:20:35 I just wanted to have a decent
00:20:39 - You misunderstood me.
00:20:44 - I'll get out here.
00:20:52 You're acting stupid.
00:20:54 Fuck off. Shame on you.
00:21:03 Fuck off and
00:21:18 Is Ankara this way?
00:21:20 You're completely wrong,
00:21:24 Come this way.
00:21:34 Just go...
00:21:45 Stop right there.
00:21:53 Turn around here.
00:21:54 Drive 700-800 km straight on
00:22:00 - Damn you!
00:22:21 Oh my.
00:22:32 Look here, Rapunzel.
00:22:35 You mean Mr Muhsin?
00:22:37 It's private. I have something
00:22:39 I see. Do you have
00:22:41 I don't like appointments.
00:22:43 A procrastinated, complaining life.
00:22:46 What's that got to do
00:22:48 Go find me Muhsin.
00:22:53 - Where do you come from?
00:22:57 I fought wolves, wrestled
00:23:00 I'll handle it, Aysegül.
00:23:04 God almighty.
00:23:08 You take turns in asking
00:23:10 You make such a fuss! I found
00:23:14 ...and brought it here
00:23:15 Give it to me and
00:23:17 - Yeah, right!
00:23:20 Bullshit! Does this look
00:23:25 - What do you mean?
00:23:29 You're going to grab it, huh?
00:23:32 Swipe it all, huh?
00:23:35 You're completely wrong, sir.
00:23:37 You managers are all
00:23:40 You're all brown-nosers
00:23:43 When they leave,
00:23:46 What are you saying?
00:23:47 Go get me Muhsin. Move it.
00:23:49 I'll give it to him in person.
00:23:51 Allright. Calm down.
00:23:59 Please, wait here.
00:24:01 I'll be over there.
00:24:44 Sir, what happened here?
00:24:47 Two kids came along. One from
00:24:50 They started to fight,
00:24:54 One of them hit the other
00:24:56 I caught him in the air and
00:25:02 Then I slapped the other one.
00:25:04 The vase began to sway.
00:25:08 Whatever. Mr. Muhsin is waiting
00:25:12 Get this cleaned.
00:25:15 - Get it all cleaned up.
00:25:29 What a fine coffee.
00:25:31 - Enjoy.
00:25:34 You can't take care
00:25:37 Those rocker guys
00:25:40 ...have their wallets all chained up,
00:25:45 What an absurd, unruly,
00:25:49 What a disoriented,
00:25:53 Come to your senses.
00:25:56 I can't agree more. It's impossible
00:26:01 - Isn't that so, Erim?
00:26:04 I have to return your favor.
00:26:09 - If you would accept this.
00:26:14 - By no means.
00:26:17 - There's still humane people around.
00:26:20 Shaddup!
00:26:22 In that case, let's accommodate you
00:26:25 That's uneard of!
00:26:29 - You could at least...
00:26:33 Brown noser!
00:26:35 Loser!
00:26:39 Get smart.
00:26:43 Well, I'm off.
00:26:45 I'll have to walk 700-800 km.
00:26:53 Here's my card with my number.
00:26:55 You can call me whenever you want.
00:26:58 - Beware, I'll call whenever I want.
00:27:02 - Whenever I need something.
00:27:05 - You're just a phone call away.
00:27:08 Muhsin Basaran. My man.
00:27:11 - Good bye.
00:27:22 - Yo. Got any smoke?
00:27:28 Do hot babes come
00:27:31 - Of course.
00:27:34 Russia, Germany, Holland.
00:27:39 Look, a tourjust came in.
00:27:52 Are you perverse?
00:27:55 It's the first time
00:29:20 What's that on your leg?
00:29:22 That's my birth mark.
00:29:24 My mom's gift.
00:29:27 Looks like shit stain.
00:30:16 Sibel, move it.
00:30:39 Hello. Dear Muhsin.
00:30:43 I've decided to rethink
00:30:47 - Your name.
00:30:51 Welcome. Mr. Muhsin has placed
00:30:55 Thanks.
00:30:56 Our hotel is all inclusive.
00:31:00 What you mean "put on"?
00:31:03 I'll put it on myself.
00:31:11 Why are you coming along? I think
00:31:15 That's for sure but I have to
00:31:17 - Why?
00:31:21 All rooms are numbered.
00:31:25 - Won't I find my room?
00:31:28 Here's our room.
00:31:30 - Hold it there. Step over.
00:31:34 I don't let any other filthy male
00:31:38 - I was just going to show the room...
00:31:41 Is that an 80 m2 room? It's just
00:31:44 ...a TV and coffee table.
00:31:47 You just want to go Indra Gandhi
00:31:54 I won't fall for that.
00:31:57 Allright, sir. Here you are.
00:31:59 Come over here.
00:32:03 Where can I get in touch with
00:32:07 - At dinner.
00:32:10 - 8 o'clock.
00:32:13 Beat it!
00:32:18 Get out of my way.
00:32:23 These bags are heavy
00:32:28 The bellboy was going to carry
00:32:31 Just to avoid a tip...
00:32:33 Money is the most valuable thing.
00:32:38 Phone. Phone.
00:32:44 Just answer it!
00:32:48 To hell with you.
00:32:56 Hello. Ahmet.
00:33:01 She's in the shower, dear.
00:33:07 Don't worry. I'll make you both
00:33:11 Of course, my child. May God
00:33:15 Good evening, my child.
00:33:18 Good evening, my child.
00:33:21 Open your ears.
00:33:25 - His family is noble.
00:33:28 Of course. And he's
00:33:31 You had a little fight and he sent
00:33:37 You should be grateful
00:33:40 Fuck such luck.
00:33:42 You brute. You're not
00:33:45 I don't want to hear
00:34:37 You build a five-star resort but
00:34:45 What good will that do?
00:36:56 It's my door,
00:36:58 - Pervert.
00:37:00 You're the pervert.
00:37:12 All our guests are elite like you.
00:37:15 There are only families here,
00:37:20 There's no electrical phase
00:37:25 Where's the bellboy?
00:37:27 Fadl, deal with it. Let me
00:37:32 What's this?
00:37:33 It's the new trend.
00:37:38 You can't walk around like this.
00:37:41 Come along.
00:37:42 You were supposed to show me
00:37:50 If it's that simple, why did you
00:37:53 ...covered in foam, and
00:37:56 You didn't let me into your room.
00:37:58 When you put your card in here
00:38:02 I'll never set foot in that
00:38:06 I'll wipe off my armpits and my
00:38:11 That's it.
00:38:13 - What time is it?
00:38:16 - So I missed dinner, huh?
00:38:19 I like the light in your eyes.
00:38:23 I'd like to but the manager
00:38:25 Don't get me started
00:38:27 Don't get me started
00:38:29 I'm aggressive,
00:38:32 I'll beat the shit out
00:38:37 Sit down. All sort of shit
00:38:43 - Why is that?
00:38:44 I got out because of the card thing,
00:38:50 Just when I was taking care of it
00:38:55 A fat, repulsive woman came along
00:39:00 There's one in your neighborhood
00:39:04 I'm aggressive
00:39:07 When I lower my shields
00:39:09 - You mean...?
00:39:13 It's a very important day for
00:39:18 What's with that shirt? Button up.
00:39:21 Where have you been?
00:39:24 I was with Mr. Recep.
00:39:26 That's great. From now on
00:39:30 You'll follow his every step.
00:39:34 ...l'll hold you responsible.
00:39:36 This is very important.
00:39:37 It's very important for the
00:39:41 - Yes, sir.
00:39:45 Yes, people...
00:40:07 Florance projection.
00:40:34 What are you doing, you oaf?
00:40:35 You closed the toilet. Do I have to
00:40:40 It's not closed. We wrapped it
00:40:44 Do you write everything you do?
00:40:47 How dare you enter
00:40:50 How can you violate
00:40:52 You put up a "clean room" sign.
00:40:55 Give me that.
00:40:57 - What does is say here?
00:40:59 - Does that mean "clean my room"?
00:41:02 - What does it say here?
00:41:06 Than I'm all "do not disturb" to you.
00:41:09 You're all blown up.
00:41:12 ...and you could be sold
00:41:16 Buffalo!
00:41:18 Rhino-shaped, tempered,
00:41:22 Distorted pirana.
00:41:26 Clean yourself
00:42:40 What do you think you're doing?
00:42:43 - I was just...
00:42:45 ...in case you didn't notice.
00:42:47 Shut up! What are you
00:42:50 Get over here.
00:42:52 - I'm sorry.
00:42:54 Are you insane?
00:42:57 Looks like he was born
00:43:01 What are you doing at the pool?
00:43:06 And wet yourself over there.
00:43:09 Brother Recep, what happened?
00:43:11 - There was this bee and... - You don't
00:43:15 I wasrt. There was this
00:43:17 Come along.
00:43:26 - How do I look?
00:43:29 - Take a good look.
00:43:32 - Will you keep it on?
00:43:34 - Let me take off the alarm.
00:43:37 Cause the alarms beep.
00:43:38 Were the alarms on these
00:43:42 - Yes, sir...
00:43:44 These belong to me then and
00:43:48 - But sir...
00:43:52 Allright, damn.
00:43:54 Look here. You ugly duckling.
00:43:59 What do you mean "damn"?
00:44:02 It's alright, bro.
00:44:05 Everything's fine. Chill.
00:44:08 Let's get out.
00:44:13 Put these on Mr. Muhsirs tab.
00:44:16 - Plus, I'm VIP.
00:44:20 I'll leave a mark of my slippers
00:44:22 - Come bro.
00:44:26 It's over, alright.
00:44:27 Do you hear it?
00:44:30 You see?
00:44:32 That's what I'm trying to say.
00:44:37 Keep laughing like this.
00:44:40 - Let me take that too.
00:44:42 I thought if something's missing
00:44:45 Let's go.
00:44:59 7-5.
00:45:16 Bravo! Hello,
00:45:19 - You again?
00:45:22 I'm a guest here too. It's my right
00:45:25 Not in our team.
00:45:27 I'll play in the opposing team then.
00:45:28 Dude, get out.
00:45:31 - Get lost!
00:45:34 Shaddup. Get lost.
00:45:38 Watch out for your positions.
00:45:40 Let's take good positions
00:45:47 Hit it.
00:46:21 Mr. Recep's team has won.
00:46:30 Why the long face
00:46:33 What long face?
00:46:34 We may be opponents on the field
00:46:38 - We're no friends.
00:46:42 What?
00:46:44 - This. - what am I supposed
00:46:46 - I won this for you.
00:46:50 - Will you please take it?
00:46:51 Please.
00:47:05 We won!
00:47:31 What's up here?
00:47:33 - It's the open buffet line.
00:47:36 You get in line and get as much
00:47:40 Can I eat here as much as I like
00:47:43 Of course.
00:47:45 - Are you sure?
00:47:48 - I push the limits.
00:47:50 I don't know any limits.
00:47:53 - So it is.
00:47:55 Deal.
00:48:01 Sister, don't grab food
00:48:04 How many dolma are still there?
00:48:08 Are you starved or depraved?
00:48:12 Beat it!
00:48:25 What are you doing, Mr. Recep?
00:48:28 What's this? Please,
00:48:32 What are you doing?
00:48:35 - You said open buffet.
00:48:39 You said I can eat
00:48:41 - Yes, but...
00:48:43 Not at all. What weasel...
00:48:45 - Shut up!
00:48:47 Shut up!
00:48:49 Dear guests, please
00:48:53 Please. To the other side.
00:48:58 What are you doing?
00:49:02 What are you doing?
00:49:04 Get lost!
00:49:08 I don't understand why they
00:49:10 What's not to understand?
00:49:14 We had an uncle Recep in the hood,
00:49:16 He sat cross-legged
00:49:19 Hello, bon appetit.
00:49:24 I apologized for my stupidity
00:49:27 ...but I also got a döner plate
00:49:30 Thanks, I don't eat meat.
00:49:33 It's delicious. Made of veal rump
00:49:37 I'm about to pass out.
00:49:39 Why do you insist?
00:49:41 Why do you keep stalking us
00:49:44 I'll complain about you.
00:49:48 I do sports and aerobics
00:49:52 ...eat healthy. I suggest
00:49:56 I'll leave this anYWay. Maybe
00:49:58 Her stomach has several layers
00:50:01 ...looks like a pelican beak. It's obvious
00:50:04 - Bon appetite.
00:50:07 I want to add
00:50:10 Do I have any
00:50:16 Yahya, you have to use 2 bottles.
00:50:20 Yes. Smile while you're at it.
00:50:26 - Hello, mate.
00:50:29 I've decided to adopt a healthy
00:50:31 I want to attend aerobics.
00:50:35 You and aerobics?
00:50:40 Since I have sleep acnea,
00:50:44 - Could it be a little later?
00:50:47 But I can wake you up at 8.
00:50:49 Do you have any aerobic wear?
00:50:53 I bought them recently, they
00:50:57 You need a special outfit
00:50:59 - I can get it for you.
00:51:03 - Sure. Don't worry.
00:51:04 - I'll get them.
00:51:06 - Why should I?
00:51:08 - Promise.
00:51:10 - I will.
00:51:12 - Goodness gracious.
00:51:14 And if you don't...
00:51:16 - If you don't you're a fag.
00:51:19 - If you don't, you're a fag.
00:51:22 - Are you going to send them?
00:51:23 Take a scout's oath
00:51:25 How do you do that?
00:51:27 Yes. Are you satisfied now?
00:51:30 - God bless you.
00:51:38 3. 4.
00:51:42 Yes, ladies.
00:51:51 Up and down.
00:52:02 Hello, teacher.
00:52:04 Yes, sir. Please sit.
00:52:07 Good morning, ladies. Let's
00:52:10 ...and get rid of our
00:52:17 With this move we work our
00:52:27 Up and down.
00:52:33 Unbelievable! How monstrous
00:52:38 We're working on bowel movements
00:52:42 I ate too much döner and now
00:52:45 And it found it's way out.
00:52:47 I can't care less. You just
00:52:50 Take a look at those tights.
00:52:53 Helly, Mrs. Sibel. Today
00:52:56 - I won't.
00:52:59 Why don't you condemn him?
00:53:03 Please, these are no tights.
00:53:07 Bullshit. Scuba diving wear, huh?
00:53:13 Scuba wear was invented by
00:53:19 Shaddup!
00:53:20 Marcell Ducell, my ass.
00:53:22 This is common culture. And you're
00:53:27 You bought it wrong.
00:53:31 I didn't buy these.
00:53:33 That lousy manager
00:53:48 What?
00:53:50 What are you laughing at?
00:53:53 This is aerobic wear.
00:53:55 I don't speak no Turkish.
00:54:00 Get lost.
00:54:06 Psycho duo.
00:54:14 This cove is called
00:00:05 ...and zeus sanctified Artemis
00:00:09 The cove is 55 m deep and has
00:00:13 Did you count them?
00:00:16 Excuse me?
00:00:17 300 species you said and
00:00:22 - Of course.
00:00:26 I will. No big deal.
00:00:28 Bluefish, gray mullet, sea bream,
00:00:33 Small bluefish.
00:00:36 - Turbot.
00:00:39 Did I say bluefish?
00:00:42 What happened to 300?
00:00:45 Where are the other 291? Jerk!
00:00:49 When you asked suddenly,
00:00:51 I'll name them all after
00:00:54 Are we ready for the dive?
00:00:56 Let's go over the rules again.
00:00:58 This means "up".
00:01:03 OK.
00:01:06 This is "OK" to the boat.
00:01:09 When we do this during
00:01:11 ..."Referee, may my head
00:01:16 What are we doing now?
00:01:17 Don't you ever
00:01:20 If you get stuck in a rock,
00:01:24 This makes me laugh
00:01:27 Like this?
00:01:33 You're joking again.
00:01:35 AnYWay, let's get to know
00:01:38 This is the tank.
00:01:42 Mask.
00:01:46 I guess this is the snorkel.
00:01:48 Why should there be a snorkel
00:01:51 You don't know
00:01:54 Where's the regulator?
00:01:57 Where's the government?
00:01:59 What kind of a diving instructor
00:02:01 Jeez, an instructor
00:02:06 Here's another move to
00:02:09 But I'll do that underwater.
00:02:14 Another interesting joke.
00:02:16 AnYWay, if we're ready
00:02:20 ...and let's dive.
00:02:28 Diving is very popular in our family.
00:02:30 My grandpa dived in the
00:02:34 Skindived to 50 meters.
00:02:38 He caught a bluefish
00:02:40 He was that kind of a guy.
00:02:44 Put something on your head,
00:02:47 If it gets cold, let it go.
00:02:55 Sis, help me with that.
00:03:07 Sibel, ask your mom
00:03:12 No. I can't do this.
00:03:15 I'll stay on the boat.
00:03:25 I can't breathe.
00:03:34 We press on this button
00:03:42 Who came up with this diving?
00:03:54 One, two, three, four.
00:03:57 One is missing.
00:04:01 Where's the guy?
00:04:06 Where the hell is he?
00:04:08 He doesn't have that much air.
00:04:11 He's not going to come.
00:04:14 Do so many people
00:04:17 Yes, Captain.
00:04:20 I have blood pressure problems
00:04:24 I don't care where that
00:04:26 He'll find a sewer to surface.
00:04:30 Allright, you go back then.
00:04:33 In all these years I have never
00:04:37 Son...
00:04:40 ...from now on you're in charge.
00:04:55 Cut!
00:04:57 It's no good.
00:04:59 Moan, not scream.
00:05:01 And you'll do like this.
00:05:17 - We're losing the light.
00:05:19 Yo.
00:05:21 - What are you doing there?
00:05:24 - What kind of a movie?
00:05:28 - What's with you?
00:05:32 Turn your back towards me,
00:05:35 There's Manavgat.
00:05:37 Be careful and don't let the
00:05:40 That's the golden rule of movies.
00:05:42 We have no overlapping voices
00:05:47 The gendarmerie patrols this
00:06:11 Good evening!
00:06:16 You don't run around like this
00:06:19 I almost had a stroke.
00:06:21 I apologize because of my outfit.
00:06:23 But I have struggled for 17 hours
00:06:27 ...in the raging blue waters
00:06:31 ...and caretta carettas
00:06:36 Why didn't you wait up for me?
00:06:37 We waited for hours. When you
00:06:41 Plus, when my mom got ill
00:06:46 Sorry to hear.
00:06:47 Thanks, I have
00:06:50 ...and have to take my pills.
00:06:53 And I get sea sick easily.
00:06:57 Do you have headaches
00:07:00 Yes, a little. Why?
00:07:09 Very bad.
00:07:11 I had a grandma and she was
00:07:15 She said she had headaches
00:07:18 And she kicked the bucket
00:07:20 Her body was swollen up
00:07:24 We tried to take her out
00:07:26 ...but she didn't fit through the door.
00:07:29 ...and we pulled our pickup truck
00:07:32 We put her body through the
00:07:35 That's how she got to the morgue.
00:07:38 Heaven forbid,
00:07:41 He's like bad news.
00:07:43 That's life, lady. The pleasure is
00:07:48 Sibel, I fought at 47 meters
00:07:54 Wrestled with two seals
00:07:58 ...and got you this
00:08:00 Put it on your ear
00:08:08 Listen.
00:08:10 Thank you. You didn't have to.
00:08:12 I don't listen much to folk songs.
00:08:18 Electronic discotronic style.
00:08:21 Something like that.
00:08:25 Have a good evening then.
00:08:27 Eat less. You eat too much.
00:08:37 You're gorgeous fiancee waits
00:08:40 ...but you accept sea shells
00:08:43 And then it is
00:08:45 I'll beat the living
00:08:49 Don't rub that on your face.
00:08:53 You'll get infected.
00:09:21 What's up, bro?
00:09:22 Smell this. Is it alright?
00:09:24 - What is this?
00:09:26 - No, thanks.
00:09:29 Lift your other leg.
00:09:32 Yes, that's more like it.
00:09:35 - Let's go.
00:09:36 - To the disco.
00:09:38 It's very important for me
00:09:40 Thanks but I'm having
00:09:43 - I shouldn't come.
00:09:46 Excuse me for tonight.
00:09:47 What kind of a man are you!?
00:09:50 What kind of a mind do you have?
00:09:52 What kind of a brain you got?
00:09:55 And most important
00:09:59 I'm telling you it's the most
00:10:01 You have to stand by my side.
00:10:03 Curse the day I met you!
00:10:06 Curse the day I let you
00:10:10 Beast! Dog!
00:10:18 Let me take that, so I never
00:10:22 Come on.
00:10:24 Shameless!
00:10:49 Hi Recep! Do you
00:10:52 Of course. I'm a disco child
00:10:56 Who's that retard over there?
00:10:58 - He's one of our friends...
00:11:09 I really need it.
00:11:12 I'll make sure you relax tomorrow,
00:11:16 Hi. What's up? Who's this guy?
00:11:20 - Hi, I'm Murat.
00:11:26 What's up you tart?
00:11:31 That's no way to talk...
00:11:32 I got plenty of these lines
00:11:39 Are you a child
00:11:41 I can tease you in very
00:11:43 Get on the dance floor
00:11:45 Listen pall, I'll make you sorry
00:11:48 Cut that "burry you" crap
00:11:54 Step on the floor if you dare.
00:11:55 - Come on.
00:11:56 - Come on!
00:14:00 - Bravo, you were great.
00:14:03 Be careful, it'll knock you out.
00:14:08 I'll be fine.
00:14:31 He's completely flipped out.
00:14:35 Boy... wake up!
00:14:39 You look like
00:14:42 - Is it morning already?
00:14:45 Don't you have a place
00:14:47 - Oh, mum. Was that you?
00:14:52 You're drunk
00:14:56 Listen, I respect you because
00:14:59 - Where's Sibel?
00:15:01 Stay away from my daughter.
00:15:04 Or I'll place a complaint and get you
00:15:07 - Mum, I'm going in.
00:15:10 If it's good,
00:15:14 Fine.
00:15:18 What kind of a talk is that?
00:15:21 "If it's good, I'll have it too"
00:15:25 What a dirty talk is that?
00:15:32 I'm very good.
00:15:44 How can I help you, sir?
00:15:46 I was just going to look
00:15:48 Yeah, right. Is this a disco
00:15:51 This is a massage parlor.
00:15:53 You can't get in
00:15:55 Is this like the massage parlor
00:15:58 ...where the massage ends
00:16:00 There hasn't been a single women
00:16:03 The secret is in my fingers.
00:16:06 Which room shall we put
00:16:08 - Number 3.
00:16:20 I have to take a shit.
00:16:25 Where can I shit?
00:16:28 Over there. Go.
00:16:51 There's your happy end,
00:16:54 Plus with these hands.
00:17:16 Hello.
00:17:18 Another friend was going to come
00:17:23 I'll do your massage.
00:17:25 Number 3 is full.
00:17:27 I'm so sorry.
00:17:31 It's alright.
00:17:32 - I'm sorry.
00:17:40 First massage, ankle, heel, calf.
00:17:46 Let's get your foot up.
00:17:51 Nice.
00:17:56 Now... there's someone in this
00:18:05 Never mind his name.
00:18:07 His name starts with me.
00:18:15 All men look out to take shelter
00:18:22 But at the same time desires
00:18:28 That's why...
00:18:34 ...you're just the kind of woman
00:18:42 I would like to recite you
00:18:52 I'd like to see the light
00:18:56 And the joy you bear inside
00:18:59 You're like a festival
00:19:04 You're like a rock festival
00:19:08 Recep says
00:19:14 How's that?
00:19:18 Did you walk a lot yesterday?
00:19:23 Did you get stung by a bee?
00:19:25 Your feet have turned
00:19:30 Huh? Your legs are like
00:19:33 Your feet have turned into
00:19:36 There's something
00:19:39 You should have a birth mark here.
00:19:43 Just a second.
00:19:47 It's here. Nobody said such
00:19:52 What's going on?
00:19:55 Don't make any stupid moves.
00:19:59 Darling, where are you going?
00:20:06 Sibel, where on earth were you?
00:20:19 Sir, stop, stop!
00:20:22 I don't want any photos.
00:20:24 Just one photo
00:20:27 I don't want any photos.
00:20:30 It will be perfect,
00:20:46 I told you I don't want
00:20:49 Don't be shy. I'm the
00:20:52 Just one nice picture.
00:20:55 - Do you get the pool too?
00:20:59 Let me pose for you.
00:21:02 Very nice.
00:21:03 - Count from three.
00:21:10 - But sir, this is no good.
00:21:20 Why to all nutcases
00:21:31 You too?
00:21:36 - How many megapixel is that?
00:21:38 Five?
00:21:40 - Let's get some pictures taken.
00:21:51 Why did you look that way?
00:21:53 Your boob touched my arm
00:21:55 I don't get well along
00:21:56 Yeah, right. A woman was chasing
00:22:00 What an pain in the neck.
00:22:07 Plus, she's hideous. Ugly people
00:22:11 What am I supposed to tell her...
00:22:13 ..."Rip out your heart, throw it
00:22:17 Let's get back to us. I want that
00:22:21 - Sure. You got an e-mail address.
00:22:24 Recep-*!? - Ivedik95"@.com
00:22:34 Nonsense, there's no
00:22:36 Why not? I got them
00:22:38 I pressed on to many keys,
00:22:41 But I always use this one.
00:22:42 - My messenger ID is different.
00:22:45 - Will you come to the show tonight?
00:22:50 I'll take a look into my organizer
00:22:53 - Will you go?
00:22:56 Let's meet there.
00:22:59 Heaven forbid, you might
00:23:01 Then headache, fever and then
00:23:05 Be careful.
00:23:10 There's so few photos, shoot more.
00:23:18 How are you, boy?
00:23:21 What is that uncle doing?
00:23:25 Really, what is he doing?
00:23:28 What's this photo doing here?
00:23:31 Go and play in the park.
00:23:38 Yo. Yo.
00:23:40 Look here.
00:23:43 What are you doing
00:23:46 Come here, kitty.
00:23:49 Sweet kitty.
00:23:54 Brother Recep.
00:23:56 I'll eat you.
00:23:59 - To the animation show.
00:24:02 Do I look like an idiot to you?
00:24:04 You think I won't find
00:24:09 - Take this here.
00:24:11 Clean it up from lice and fleas,
00:24:16 - Allright?
00:24:17 Good for you.
00:24:25 One more time.
00:24:29 Very nice.
00:24:33 Dear guests, we have
00:24:36 Before choosing the final one,
00:24:40 The men have the balloons
00:24:42 ...and the girls sit on them. The
00:24:45 ...will win the game. Now
00:24:49 A volunteer male. You, sir.
00:24:54 No? Are there
00:25:03 Welcome, sir.
00:25:04 - Please, sit.
00:25:05 I've got nothing to do with this.
00:25:11 This is a game.
00:25:13 - I've got nothing to do with this.
00:25:15 Don't applaud!
00:25:18 - I've got nothing to do with this.
00:25:21 - Recep.
00:25:25 I want a volunteer lady
00:25:28 Thanks. God bless you.
00:25:32 - Me! Me!
00:25:35 No! Not that woman!
00:25:38 I don't accept this.
00:25:42 I won't accept this.
00:25:44 You asked for a lady
00:25:46 - Please, sit.
00:25:49 - We're going to win.
00:25:54 - I'll devour you.
00:25:57 - Then I'll eat you slowly.
00:26:02 Don't applaud!
00:26:04 I count down from three
00:26:06 Don't count!
00:26:09 3. 2. 1.
00:26:19 My testisterones!
00:26:22 Stop! It hurts!
00:26:31 Get off me!
00:26:36 I'll punch your head in!
00:26:38 Why do you laugh?
00:26:41 Brother Recep!
00:26:42 What kind of a woman are you?
00:26:44 I've had enough of you!
00:26:47 - Come along.
00:27:15 Mr. Recep, what are you doing?
00:27:19 Get out of there.
00:27:22 Sorry, I got thirsty.
00:27:25 Enough is enough. They say
00:27:28 ...last night, during the show.
00:27:31 Everybody was laughing.
00:27:33 The lady was disgraced.
00:27:35 I lost count of the
00:27:39 Giving the finger
00:27:42 This hotel is not used to
00:27:44 This is a five-star complex.
00:27:46 Hear me well. I'm aggressive,
00:27:53 I don't give a damn if you're
00:27:56 I'll tear down your hotel.
00:27:59 Are you threatening me? Great.
00:28:02 - Who are you?
00:28:05 Who are you?
00:28:07 I'm a member of Karaambar
00:28:12 Karaambar Truckers Community,
00:28:14 Who are you? Bandits?
00:28:17 How could you tear down the hotel?
00:28:19 Karaambar Truckers whatsoever.
00:28:23 You really spoke very harsh.
00:28:27 You took a grenade,
00:28:29 ...and you're holding it
00:28:31 You couldn't scare me
00:28:34 Get out! Out!
00:28:37 Just say it and we'll
00:28:40 Start digging, mates!
00:28:42 Stop!
00:28:44 Whoa! Hold your horses!
00:28:46 But Mr. Recep, please.
00:28:48 What do you suggest
00:28:51 Stop or move on?
00:28:53 Please, don't.
00:28:57 I just wanted to meet your
00:28:59 That's why I said "who are
00:29:01 That's what I meant.
00:29:03 And they came to meet you.
00:29:06 - I'm Halil. Pleased to meet you.
00:29:11 I'm Erim. The hotel manager.
00:29:13 Look, what a kind-hearted
00:29:17 Don't mention it.
00:29:20 I'd like to talk to you in private
00:29:24 ...babe.
00:29:27 Pleased to meet you, sir.
00:29:31 I'm sure you don't have any
00:29:35 What questions?
00:29:38 You don't have to be so formal.
00:29:45 He's very funny, huh?
00:29:47 Mr. Recep is a real joker.
00:29:59 Answer the phone.
00:30:02 Don't look at me,
00:30:07 Yes?
00:30:09 Yes, Ahmet?
00:30:12 Thanks, how are you?
00:30:16 Ahmet, I want to tell you
00:30:20 I can't marry you, Ahmet.
00:30:24 I'm really sorry.
00:30:27 I really tried.
00:30:31 Give me that.
00:30:34 Hello? Ahmet, my dear,
00:30:39 Excuse her, she's young.
00:30:41 She's excited because
00:30:44 Don't worry. I'll talk to her
00:30:48 Have a nice day,
00:30:51 What do you think you're doing?
00:30:53 I can't marry someone
00:30:55 Are you going to
00:30:58 You're engaged.
00:30:59 You should've thought twice before
00:31:03 Shame on you!
00:31:07 I wanted you to have
00:31:10 Enough! I'm sick and tired
00:31:14 It was really stupid
00:31:18 I want to marry
00:31:20 Why won't you understand?
00:31:22 Love won't still your hunger.
00:31:28 You'll marry him
00:31:30 Talk as much as you want.
00:31:33 You will and that's that.
00:31:35 Oh God.
00:31:37 Enough! I've had it of such
00:31:42 I'm going for a swim.
00:32:03 I was walking by and saw you
00:32:06 Nothing. Never mind.
00:32:08 You look upset.
00:32:12 - Some people get on my nerves.
00:32:15 Anyone who gets on her nerve
00:32:18 I'll knock their face in.
00:32:24 What was that?
00:32:26 Sorry, there was too much
00:32:30 Look at me.
00:32:37 I see, there's something
00:32:42 Can you do this?
00:32:50 Gross. Look.
00:33:11 Is that your mom?
00:33:12 Yes.
00:33:14 Hey!
00:33:23 Mum!
00:33:36 Help! There's a hairy
00:33:39 - Mom.
00:33:41 I can't breathe.
00:33:44 My guts.
00:33:56 Are you alright, auntie?
00:33:57 My ribs.
00:34:00 Idiot!
00:34:01 What makes you ride here?
00:34:05 Everyone's basking here
00:34:08 Ox!
00:34:11 Get lost!
00:34:27 - Brother Recep. You're great.
00:35:11 Mum?
00:35:16 I almost passed away today.
00:35:20 Don't talk nonsense.
00:35:22 I was going to die before
00:35:25 Sibel, you're going to marry
00:35:34 Allright, mum.
00:35:37 - I'm not promising anything.
00:35:43 Sibel, don't leave me here.
00:35:50 Brother Recep,
00:35:53 Thanks a lot. Yo, nutty boy.
00:35:57 - Are you sure it's alright?
00:36:00 More, more, more. There,
00:36:05 I ask the guy "why do you
00:36:07 ...and have the water
00:36:12 He says "I thought you had fun."
00:36:14 I have panic attack.
00:36:18 He said "You're right, bro."
00:36:20 I said "If I catch you on land
00:36:23 I'll turn you into one
00:36:26 He got scared.
00:36:31 You bounced
00:36:35 Is that a nice word to use?
00:36:37 Is that nice?
00:36:39 What do you mean 'balls'?
00:36:43 Why do you drive me nuts?
00:36:45 Isn't that so?
00:36:49 I'll throw you one
00:36:51 ...and make you smile
00:36:53 What's this, is he
00:36:56 You say something and
00:37:00 The IV suits you very nicely.
00:37:02 Who's that?
00:37:05 Yes, that's her.
00:37:07 - Hold this.
00:37:11 - But no...
00:37:25 Hello there.
00:37:28 Hi.
00:37:30 What's wrong?
00:37:33 Nothing, Recep.
00:37:35 Did something happen
00:37:37 Did she reject therapy? Is she
00:37:40 Mum is fine...
00:37:44 - What's wrong?
00:37:50 - Shall I tell you a story?
00:37:53 There is this clown who makes
00:37:56 Someday a crybaby
00:37:58 The doctor says
00:38:00 And the guy says
00:38:03 What's that
00:38:05 I didn't get that either. I don't
00:38:12 There was this movie: "lt."
00:38:14 All kind of strange things.
00:38:27 Recep, I'm engaged.
00:38:37 - Engaged?
00:38:40 So you're going to get wed?
00:38:45 - You know how families...
00:38:48 - It's my mom's...
00:38:50 Sibel, don't talk, please.
00:38:51 But...
00:38:55 - But Recep...
00:40:08 What happened Brother Recep?
00:40:11 - They're tormenting me.
00:40:14 People.
00:40:16 They talk crap,
00:40:20 Then they annoy me.
00:40:22 Nothing's working out for me.
00:40:25 Did I put a spell on someone
00:40:30 Everything's will be alright.
00:40:32 It won't. My whole life is such
00:40:36 ...that it won't be alright.
00:40:44 If we sit more like this, our
00:40:48 Then we won't have any kids.
00:41:03 I'm leaving now, pal.
00:41:06 Take care of yourself.
00:41:09 Don't let that ass of a manager
00:41:12 - OK, bro.
00:41:15 Allright, bro. I wish
00:41:19 It will be very
00:41:21 I'm aware of that
00:41:24 This place bears no meaning
00:41:28 - I have a last request from you.
00:41:34 Give these to Sibel.
00:41:39 Don't worry.
00:41:44 - Is everything here?
00:41:46 Food, shirt, slippers.
00:41:49 Let me give you a hug.
00:41:59 - Is that the manager's car?
00:42:02 - Open the hood.
00:42:04 Open it. Don't get me
00:43:12 How could he leave
00:43:15 How could he leave
00:43:19 - But sir, I wasrt...
00:43:25 How can you be this careless,
00:43:28 Didrt I tell you to follow him?
00:43:33 You have no more leaves.
00:43:38 To hell with your battery!
00:43:43 You're fired!
00:43:44 Bugger off! I quit!
00:43:50 - Did Mrs. Sibel leave?
00:43:53 They're going to the airport.
00:44:22 Mrs. Sibel!
00:44:29 What happened?
00:44:31 Brother Recep asked me
00:45:20 Salih, are you facebook member?
00:45:22 No but if it's good
00:45:23 Never mind. It's full with
00:45:26 I'm thinking of leaving.
00:45:32 Up, up. Little bit to the left.
00:45:36 - Is it good so?
00:45:47 To the auto industry park, please.
00:45:50 Of course, babe.
00:45:58 Good so. Lower.
00:46:00 Lower I said.
00:46:03 What are you doing here?
00:46:06 Sir, I swear we're shooting
00:46:09 - Art movie, my ass.
00:46:14 I have two weaknesses.
00:46:17 One is alcohol.
00:46:21 I didn't get you. There's
00:46:23 - How could that be a weakness?
00:46:26 Since there is none