Scary Movie

en
00:00:34 - Hello.
00:00:37 - Who's this?
00:00:40 I don't think so.
00:00:42 - What's that noise?
00:00:45 - I didn't think
00:00:48 Oh. I'm making popcorn.
00:00:52 - Ooh. What is it?
00:00:56 - Do you like scary movies?
00:00:58 - What's your favorite?
00:01:01 Think.
00:01:03 Oh, I know. Um, Kazaam,
00:01:07 - That's not a horror movie.
00:01:12 - Hey, you have a nice voice.
00:01:15 You never did tell me your name.
00:01:18 Why do you wanna know my name?
00:01:20 'Cause I wanna know
00:01:24 What--
00:01:27 Nice breasts.
00:01:29 Look, what do you want?
00:01:31 I wanna see
00:01:34 Well--Well, then,
00:01:36 Oh.
00:01:38 Hey, nice.
00:01:42 Listen, asshole, you've had your fun,
00:01:46 - Or else what?
00:01:49 and he's black
00:01:51 - Oh, really?
00:01:53 You mean the one who wears makeup
00:01:55 - How did you know?
00:02:05 Help! Help!
00:02:08 Oh, that's not my boyfriend.
00:02:12 Look, I'm calling the cops.
00:02:16 Go ahead. Call the cops.
00:02:18 But you might wanna
00:02:21 You forgot to lock it.
00:02:46 Take that, you psycho!
00:02:51 I can't feel my legs.
00:02:53 I think my arm is broken.
00:02:56 - Sorry.
00:03:03 Hello, Drew.
00:03:22 Oh, God!
00:04:24 - Daddy! Daddy!
00:04:28 Daddy!
00:04:31 Daddy!
00:04:33 Daddy, no! No!
00:04:38 - Did you hear something?
00:05:08 Bobby, what are you doing?
00:05:13 It just occurred to me. I never
00:05:16 Now that you got it out of your system,
00:05:19 Why?
00:05:21 Shh. Come on.
00:05:23 What's going on in there?
00:05:25 Ow! Daddy's head is stuck.
00:05:28 - Dad, can you knock?
00:05:31 - Knock?
00:05:36 Well, it could've been that crack
00:05:39 - Yeah.
00:05:41 I gotta leave town
00:05:43 No big deal. Just that new business
00:05:46 - Oh, you mean Uncle Escobar.
00:05:49 Well, there's a problem.
00:05:51 And apparently,
00:05:53 It's just better if I lay low
00:05:56 - If the cops raid the place--
00:05:58 - And don't forget--
00:06:01 Oh, you are my little girl.
00:06:04 that I left you a little something
00:06:06 - Dad--
00:06:09 - Now, what are you
00:06:12 Baking soda.
00:06:14 Because baking powder guys
00:06:17 You love that joke,
00:06:20 You've loved that joke
00:06:23 - Okay, well--
00:06:25 - I love you.
00:06:27 - Bye.
00:06:30 Is the coast clear?
00:06:32 Oh, Cindy, that nightgown.
00:06:35 That was close. God!
00:06:42 I was, uh, home watching
00:06:47 If this is about the time
00:06:51 It was my first keg party, Bobby.
00:06:53 No. No. Uh, it was edited for TV.
00:06:58 So you thought you would just climb
00:07:01 and we would
00:07:03 I was kind of hoping
00:07:05 but I wouldn't wanna break
00:07:08 So maybe just some
00:07:15 Okay. But just for a minute.
00:07:33 What the--
00:07:35 Wrong set.
00:07:41 Bobby! Oh, Bobby!
00:07:45 l don't wanna wait
00:07:48 - No, Bobby, don't.
00:07:52 Jeez.
00:07:55 Yeah, my dad.
00:07:58 Okay, stud,
00:08:06 Oh, um,
00:08:08 I was only half-serious.
00:08:11 Hey, would you settle
00:08:14 What's that?
00:08:18 Oh, jeez!
00:08:20 Good night, Bobby.
00:08:27 Shorty, you are so loud.
00:08:31 And make sure you take
00:08:33 - I do be going to class.
00:08:37 It is when you got
00:08:39 - See, that's why
00:08:43 You my brother.
00:08:47 Oh, yeah.
00:08:51 So? I don't know him.
00:08:53 Yeah, me neither.
00:08:56 - Hey, girl, you ready?
00:09:02 - We're gonna be late.
00:09:05 I don't know why
00:09:08 - She is such a ho.
00:09:10 'Cause I've seen her.
00:09:13 - My friend Sean
00:09:16 You know, Puff Daddy?
00:09:18 Anyway, everybody was drinking
00:09:21 And then it started to get wild,
00:09:24 I look over and there was
00:09:28 So?
00:09:30 With a backup dancer.
00:09:33 I mean, that's nasty.
00:09:35 That's-That's lower
00:09:37 At least security can get you backstage.
00:09:41 Bye, Daddy.
00:09:45 She is as fake
00:09:48 Hey, baby girl!
00:09:52 What is up,
00:09:54 - Bye, Mr. Gilmore.
00:09:57 - Is he gone?
00:10:00 Do you like what you see
00:10:04 lt's all about the money
00:10:06 Hey, Cindy!
00:10:11 - I love this color.
00:10:16 - Oh, you guys should
00:10:20 - Because they test
00:10:23 Look, have you seen what they do
00:10:30 Well, I am much more
00:10:34 I'd like to feed all the hungry,
00:10:37 I'd much rather help my fellowman
00:10:40 - Spare a dollar?
00:10:42 Buffy! Can't you see
00:10:44 Here you go, sir.
00:10:48 - See?
00:10:52 Ow!
00:10:54 God.
00:10:58 It's a circus.
00:11:00 Hello. I'm Gail Hailstorm,
00:11:05 A small college town
00:11:07 after the unthinkable
00:11:10 a brutal killing spree
00:11:13 That's it. Two teens dead...
00:11:15 and this small town
00:11:17 - It's times like these--
00:11:21 There are no witnesses
00:11:23 There are no suspects
00:11:25 Police are asking anyone
00:11:27 Reporting live for Black TV.
00:11:31 Grab your shit
00:11:37 Hey, do you think the press is gonna
00:11:41 Oh, girl, no. The press
00:11:46 I'm on TV! Oh, shit!
00:11:49 Oh, man, I'm gonna be
00:11:51 - What can you tell us about Drew?
00:11:56 - I mean, it was like bang!
00:11:59 Real close.
00:12:02 Then she woke up talking about
00:12:04 So I just pulled my tongue
00:12:06 What would have been
00:12:08 Run, bitch! Run!
00:12:15 Hey, yo, dawg.
00:12:18 No, man.
00:12:22 What about now?
00:12:24 - Nah. Yeah.
00:12:27 Here. Take one, guys.
00:12:29 "Don't forget:
00:12:32 Ah! Goddamn it!
00:12:36 What's the matter, honey?
00:12:39 My report card.
00:12:44 Well, at least
00:12:46 Yeah. I did, huh?
00:12:49 You're so smart.
00:12:53 - Hey, has anybody seen Bobby?
00:12:56 You know what?
00:12:58 I don't get it.
00:13:10 See you later,
00:13:13 Big Jim, Little Jim,
00:13:16 I'll see you later. Ciao, Ding.
00:13:25 Damn, girl.
00:13:28 - I'd sure like to get in them pants.
00:13:31 Yeah. What size are these?
00:13:33 Hey, guys.
00:13:35 - Hey, Bobby.
00:13:38 - How you doing?
00:13:41 - You guys see all
00:13:44 Saying that girl Drew Decker
00:13:46 - You know what? I think I knew her.
00:13:49 - She had a brother named Steve?
00:13:52 Long hair, pretty little mouth,
00:13:55 - That was her.
00:13:58 Whatever happened
00:14:00 Do you guys think it's strange
00:14:03 exactly one year
00:14:06 you know,
00:14:08 Hey, Cindy,
00:14:11 Was it, Greg?
00:14:17 Yeah!
00:14:30 Would you look
00:14:33 When are we gonna do
00:14:35 One day.
00:14:37 - You like that, baby?
00:14:40 - You like that?
00:14:42 Oh, I love
00:14:45 I'm not playing
00:14:49 - Ray!
00:14:53 Come on, man!
00:14:57 Hold on.
00:14:59 Here. Putt his on.
00:15:04 lt's raining men
00:15:07 Hallelujah
00:15:10 Baby.
00:15:13 l'm gonna go out
00:15:18 Absolutely soakin' wet
00:15:24 Yeah! Whoo!
00:15:39 - What? It was laundry day.
00:15:43 Yeah!
00:15:45 Whoo! Yeah!
00:15:52 - Hey. Come over here.
00:15:55 - Just get a little closer to me.
00:15:58 - Bobby, what are you doing?
00:16:02 I just want you to touch it.
00:16:05 - Uh--
00:16:07 Whoo!
00:16:11 - Ow!
00:16:25 Oh, my God! Shit!
00:16:29 God, Cindy--
00:16:44 - Oh, my God.
00:16:47 I think
00:16:53 Oh, man!
00:16:56 Bobby, look at my car, man!
00:17:00 I didn't see it.
00:17:03 - Oh, my God, we hit a boot.
00:17:05 I don't know.
00:17:08 Where the--
00:17:11 It's a body!
00:17:13 - Oh, shit, is he alive?
00:17:15 - Well, check it out.
00:17:17 - Shit!
00:17:21 - No way. I ain't going to jail.
00:17:24 Cindy, do you know what they do
00:17:26 And all those sex-starved
00:17:29 Hey, you're right, Cindy.
00:17:32 Oh, yeah,
00:17:35 You think she wants
00:17:37 This is manslaughter, okay?
00:17:39 - We're looking at 10 to 15 years.
00:17:43 - It's okay. I'm fine.
00:17:46 - I'm fine.
00:17:49 - Look, we'll get rid of the body.
00:17:53 - Now you're thinking.
00:17:56 - Guess I'll be leaving now.
00:17:58 - What about the alcohol?
00:18:00 Come on. It'll be all right.
00:18:02 - Come on. Hurry up. Let's go.
00:18:05 - I won't have anything to do with this!
00:18:07 Cindy, come on.
00:18:11 You know, like the time we got drunk
00:18:14 - I'll get his arm.
00:18:17 We'll take him down to Williamson Cove
00:18:21 The sharks'll take care
00:18:23 Oh, my God,
00:18:25 - Oh, shit. It's Shorty.
00:18:35 Shorty, I know you ain't driving
00:18:38 I got papers,
00:18:41 all the ingredients
00:18:46 - Hey, yo, can I help you?
00:18:49 - Yo, son, you all need jumper cables?
00:18:52 Oh, good, 'cause I left
00:18:56 - Go home, Shorty.
00:18:59 Peace, Ray.
00:19:01 - Get the trunk closed.
00:19:04 I'll do it.
00:19:31 Hold on. Hold on. Put him down.
00:19:36 Okay, look. On three we dump him
00:19:40 Wait, wait, wait.
00:19:43 - For what?
00:19:46 We already committed murder.
00:19:49 - I'll take the credit cards.
00:19:52 - Get off! Hey, yo, get off!
00:19:57 - I got me a gold ring.
00:20:01 - All right, let's get him in the water.
00:20:05 - It's not too late.
00:20:07 - Christ, already. I'll do it.
00:20:11 Okay. One, two,
00:20:14 three.
00:20:21 Right now we make a pact.
00:20:24 - Agreed?
00:20:26 - Agreed?
00:20:28 Say it, Cindy. Say it!
00:20:31 We take this to our grave. Say it!
00:20:34 We take this to our grave. Say it.
00:20:37 Greg, chill. Come on.
00:20:39 We take this
00:20:42 And we never
00:20:45 Mention what?
00:20:47 - The guy we just killed.
00:20:51 Starting now!
00:20:53 Stupid bitch, man.
00:20:56 - God. I hate him.
00:20:59 I promise. Just touch it again.
00:21:07 - You have to move on, Cindy.
00:21:11 - It's a coincidence.
00:21:13 I mean, what do you think
00:21:16 Yeah, you guys are right.
00:21:20 they'd probably cast some ding bat
00:21:25 Yeah, or they'd cast people
00:21:31 - Kenny, get the camera ready.
00:21:36 - Sheriff, Sheriff,
00:21:40 Damn. Who do I have to screw around here
00:21:45 Hey! Hey, no running.
00:21:50 Loser.
00:21:52 - Slow it down!
00:21:55 All right!
00:21:57 Hi. Gail Hailstorm.
00:22:00 Special Officer Doofy.
00:22:02 Oh, hi, Doofy. Doofy, listen.
00:22:07 - No comment. No comment.
00:22:09 You know, you look awfully young
00:22:13 - I'm 25 and a half years old.
00:22:15 - Yeah, that's this many.
00:22:17 Yeah. That's big.
00:22:20 Well, you don't look
00:22:22 Except for the big head
00:22:26 - Ooh, was that drool?
00:22:30 Don't worry,
00:22:35 - Would you remind me
00:22:38 Due to the recent tragedy, the sheriff
00:22:41 will be questioning all students
00:22:44 Wow. Sounds like we've got the makings
00:22:47 Yeah, I'm not supposed to say.
00:22:49 Hey, Doofy, what do you say you and I
00:22:54 and, uh, get to know
00:22:56 - Would you like that?
00:23:00 Yeah.
00:23:03 - Yeah, okay, let's go. Come on.
00:23:06 A terrible tragedy
00:23:11 It's days like today
00:23:15 It starts to unravel
00:23:20 Here you go, baby.
00:23:22 Go to your daddy.
00:23:24 Oh!
00:23:27 I'll see you after class.
00:23:30 - Sweet!
00:23:32 Okay, class, who would like to give
00:23:36 - Oh!
00:23:39 - Yes!
00:23:44 Okay, Heather.
00:23:49 - Okay. Can I start?
00:23:52 Okay, my presentation
00:23:55 And it began on May 25, 1787 in Philly
00:24:00 And it states, and I quote,
00:24:02 "When our Founding Fathers
00:24:55 The First Amendment gives us the right
00:24:58 Oh, shut the fuck up!
00:25:01 So, who's next?
00:25:05 Uh, Cindy Campbell.
00:25:08 Isn't she the daughter
00:25:11 - Oh, yeah, you know,
00:25:15 Yeah. Yeah,
00:25:18 The one and only.
00:25:21 - Why, hello, Cindy.
00:25:25 - Thanks, Doofy.
00:25:29 Now, Cindy, Sheriff has some questions
00:25:34 - What is that... god-awful smell?
00:25:37 I got a poopie.
00:25:40 Did you just say
00:25:43 - Yeah. It was good.
00:25:46 - Get him out of here.
00:25:49 - Thank you, Doofy.
00:25:52 You should now go back
00:25:55 - Okay. Salute.
00:25:58 - Bye, Doofy.
00:26:02 - How are you, Cindy?
00:26:04 - How are you, Sheriff?
00:26:07 Got a boil on my ass
00:26:11 Cindy, I want to ask you
00:26:16 - I didn't really know her.
00:26:19 No. I mean,
00:26:21 I've been in this game a longtime.
00:26:25 Tell me about Drew. What
00:26:30 Tried to get you.
00:26:33 It's an old police trick.
00:26:36 Hike!
00:26:39 Pass! Pass!
00:26:44 All right, shower up!
00:26:47 Yes!
00:26:49 Yo, Dugan, man,
00:26:52 Johnson, what a block, baby.
00:26:54 Word up. Woodward. Nice ass.
00:26:59 Damn.
00:27:01 Yo, Greg, what's up?
00:27:04 No, man. I think I'm gonna workout,
00:27:08 Suit yourself, kid. All right.
00:27:13 Come on, y'all!
00:27:17 Don't let Uncle Ray catch you!
00:27:43 Who did this? Huh?
00:27:47 This isn't funny, all right?
00:27:50 A small dick's like a disability, man!
00:27:53 Would you make fun of a guy
00:27:57 Come on out here,
00:28:00 I'll kick the shit
00:28:04 It's not the size
00:28:06 it's the nail
00:28:10 It's a shame how she died.
00:28:13 - She was such a nice girl.
00:28:17 - He had the biggest crush on her.
00:28:21 Hey, hey, hey, hey,
00:28:24 You wanna get
00:28:26 - Bring it on, Ray!
00:28:29 - Take it easy. What's the problem?
00:28:32 Oh--That's you?
00:28:35 They-They turned the hot water off
00:28:44 Laugh it up, you guys.
00:28:48 You know what?
00:28:50 Greg, you're not the only one
00:28:54 Oh, you mean
00:29:00 No. I was talking
00:29:02 I got one too.
00:29:05 - Somebody knows.
00:29:08 Someone's just trying
00:29:10 We have to call
00:29:13 You call the police,
00:29:23 - You're hurting her, man.
00:29:25 That goes for all of you guys.
00:29:27 That psycho wants
00:29:30 But I'm not going to jail.
00:29:40 What's everybody
00:29:42 Just forget it, Shorty.
00:29:48 Aren't they beautiful?
00:29:53 - Buffy!
00:29:59 Very good.
00:30:06 Very good.
00:30:09 Buffy! That's my girl!
00:30:13 - That's my girlfriend!
00:30:16 - Hey, kiss my ass!
00:30:20 - All right, Buffy!
00:30:23 - The best pussy I ever had!
00:30:27 Now the talent portion
00:30:28 Oh, you guys, I'm gonna go
00:30:33 Number three, Buffy Gilmore.
00:30:36 Hey, you know what? I'm gonna
00:30:39 No, no, no. I'm good, man.
00:30:41 - Don't worry. I'll be back.
00:30:44 And what will be
00:30:46 Acting. I'll be doing
00:30:50 Yeah, yeah!
00:30:53 Buffy Gilmore
00:30:56 Hey, do that thing from Baywatch!
00:31:07 Lookout, Greg!
00:31:10 - It's him! It's the killer!
00:31:13 Oh, my God!
00:31:16 Somebody do something!
00:31:20 He's killing him!
00:31:22 - He's killing him!
00:31:25 He's killing him!
00:31:27 She's good. She's good.
00:31:31 - What's wrong with you people?
00:31:34 You fucking bastards!
00:31:37 - Amazing.
00:31:41 Oh, God!
00:31:43 Greg, hold on!
00:31:48 Give it up for Buffy Gilmore!
00:31:51 Absolutely fantastic.
00:31:56 I think we have a winner,
00:32:00 Buffy, wait.
00:32:03 - No. I have to get to Greg.
00:32:05 - They're calling your name.
00:32:09 - I won?
00:32:11 - Buffy, what happened? What about Greg?
00:32:14 - Congratulations!
00:32:17 Miss Buffy Gilmore!
00:32:20 Here she comes
00:32:22 Miss Teen She's So Fine
00:32:25 Such lovely tits
00:32:27 And a great behind
00:32:31 There she is
00:32:36 And l'll do her behind
00:32:40 Oh, there she is
00:32:43 She loves 69
00:32:46 There's no sign
00:32:48 - He could've taken the body.
00:32:52 - There's no blood.
00:32:55 another one of his dumb jokes.
00:32:57 He's gonna turn up. I'm sure of it.
00:33:00 - you guys.
00:33:02 But you know what?
00:33:05 - You mind catching
00:33:07 - All right, fine.
00:33:31 - Hello.
00:33:34 - Who is this?
00:33:37 You know, your boyfriend.
00:33:40 Yeah, I'm sorry. I guess
00:33:44 - Hey, any sign of Greg?
00:33:47 - Do you want me to come by?
00:33:50 I'm just gonna take a bath,
00:33:54 Okay. I'd really like
00:33:58 Aw. I love you too, baby.
00:34:24 Bobby, I told you--
00:34:26 I still know
00:34:28 Who is this?
00:34:43 Ow! Ow!
00:34:50 - Hello.
00:34:52 - I'm gonna slice you up.
00:34:55 - I'm gonna chop you like liver.
00:34:57 I'm in the house.
00:35:00 Do you know where I am?
00:35:05 I could be anywhere.
00:35:09 Yeah. Where am I?
00:35:14 Um, you're-you're
00:35:17 What? How do you know that?
00:35:21 I can, um, see your feet.
00:35:25 Ah! Okay, turn around.
00:35:28 Close your eyes.
00:35:35 Yeah. No. No. No.
00:35:39 Hey, no peeking.
00:35:42 Good.
00:35:44 Okay, now you look.
00:35:46 Now do you know
00:35:49 No, Mr. Killer.
00:35:53 I'll give you a big clue.
00:35:59 Oh! I gotta stop drinking.
00:36:08 - Grandma!
00:36:10 Oh, my hip!
00:36:43 White woman in trouble off the 744--
00:36:52 Are you okay? I heard screaming.
00:36:56 - Bobby, he was here.
00:36:58 - The killer was here, Bobby.
00:37:09 - I can explain that.
00:37:13 A friend gave 'em to me.
00:37:16 Cindy. Cindy!
00:37:18 Cindy! Cindy! Cindy!
00:37:26 It's me, Cind.
00:37:28 Cindy, you know me. Cindy.
00:37:37 I know you've had a rough night, Cindy,
00:37:40 I just want you to look at some photos.
00:37:49 Mm-mmm.
00:37:53 - No?
00:37:56 - I'm sorry, Sheriff.
00:38:00 Okay, you're free to go.
00:38:03 - Yeah.
00:38:06 Just check
00:38:10 - Mm, no.
00:38:15 - Guess what I just did
00:38:18 All the way, man! Yes, yes.
00:38:21 - Yeah?
00:38:24 Okay.
00:38:25 Special Officer Doofy reporting.
00:38:28 Hey, Doofy,
00:38:31 - What's that?
00:38:36 Hey, Terry,
00:38:39 - What the hell is that?
00:38:41 - Get the hell
00:38:44 - Mom said get home now.
00:38:48 - Cindy, are you okay?
00:38:52 - Go get in the car, Doofy.
00:38:55 - Yeah, Doofus.
00:38:58 you're supposed to treat me
00:39:01 Mom also said for you
00:39:04 - Oh!
00:39:07 Okay, three, two--
00:39:09 - Oh, no. Gosh darn.
00:39:12 - It's just that there's all
00:39:14 - No, I can count,
00:39:17 This little piggy went to the market.
00:39:21 Now, if this little piggy doesn't roll
00:39:23 - I'm gonna put my foot
00:39:26 Gail Hailstorm standing out front
00:39:28 where I'm going to try and get a glimpse
00:39:30 the young girl who was attacked
00:39:33 - You're on my foot, fat shit!
00:39:35 - What did I say?
00:39:38 - Why not?
00:39:40 - You idiot.
00:39:42 Cindy! Cindy!
00:39:44 - Cindy, can we get a statement?
00:39:46 - She's not talking.
00:39:49 - Come on, Cindy.
00:39:53 Bitch!
00:39:57 - Good shot.
00:40:00 - All right, who copped a feel?
00:40:02 - Oh, my God.
00:40:05 I only touched it,
00:40:08 - It was so tender and juicy.
00:40:19 - Yo.
00:40:23 Nothin'. Sittin' here watchin' the game.
00:40:30 Are you all alone?
00:40:32 - Wassup?
00:40:35 What the--
00:40:38 Yo, pick up the phone.
00:40:41 - Wassup?
00:40:46 Yo, Dookie,
00:40:50 - Yo.
00:41:01 - What you doin', son?
00:41:07 True. True.
00:41:10 So you think
00:41:15 I don't know.
00:41:18 I knew there had to be something.
00:41:22 Handsome, smart,
00:41:26 - What did you say?
00:41:30 Hey, Cind.
00:41:33 - Ow!
00:41:36 I'll get you one for your head.
00:41:39 No, no, that's okay, Doofy.
00:41:41 Hey, we're gonna get that guy
00:41:46 I'll be next door
00:41:48 Night, Cind.
00:41:51 Buffy, you told him?
00:41:53 The moron overheard a conversation
00:41:56 - Yeah, but what
00:41:59 a retarded retard
00:42:01 Cindy, telephone.
00:42:06 Thank you.
00:42:08 - Hello.
00:42:12 - Guess what.
00:42:14 - You got the wrong guy.
00:42:16 - Doofy!
00:42:18 Who is this?
00:42:20 - Doofy! Doofy!
00:42:30 Hello?
00:42:33 Hello?
00:42:35 I said don't disturb me
00:42:45 I heard Bobby got out
00:42:48 I haven't seen him around.
00:42:51 You mean since
00:42:55 Yo, son. It's like
00:42:58 They had a killer at
00:43:01 No, it was in this movie Scream.
00:43:03 Same dialogue and everything.
00:43:05 - How did it end?
00:43:07 Some niggas started shooting
00:43:10 - No doubt.
00:43:14 Tonight everyone
00:43:16 And bring some friends.
00:43:20 Okay.
00:43:22 Yo! Party at Cindy's house!
00:43:28 Ray, if you see Bobby,
00:43:33 Okay. If I see Bobby,
00:43:44 - Jesus!
00:43:47 - What, you don't still
00:43:50 It's just that somebody
00:43:52 - And the police said
00:43:57 You see, it couldn't have been me.
00:44:02 You're the best.
00:44:04 I'm sorry.
00:44:07 Understand what?
00:44:10 - That's not true, Bobby.
00:44:12 What is it?
00:44:14 - It's been over a year, Cindy.
00:44:19 - Oh, you gotta move on, baby.
00:44:22 I'm sorry if my complicated life...
00:44:25 is an inconvenience
00:44:29 Cindy. Cind.
00:44:32 Okay, everybody, listen up.
00:44:34 Let me just say, uh,
00:44:37 the killing of these teenagers
00:44:41 Hey, you know, shit happens.
00:44:43 Sheriff! Sheriff!
00:44:47 - Yes, Miss Thunderstorm.
00:44:50 - No.
00:44:52 That is classified information.
00:44:54 I'm sorry, but my sources
00:44:58 Hey, Gail.
00:45:01 Gail swallows.
00:45:10 Watch this.
00:45:13 Hello. Who is this?
00:45:16 What?
00:45:18 You wanna kill me?
00:45:21 Oh, God. Hold on.
00:45:23 Cindy, it's for you.
00:45:29 All right,
00:45:31 Now, as you all have heard,
00:45:35 and the police have asked us to give you
00:45:38 Stay in well-lit areas.
00:45:40 Do not travel alone
00:45:43 Always wipe front to back.
00:45:45 And remember, never, ever
00:45:47 when they tell you
00:45:51 will rid you
00:45:54 Now, I understand
00:45:58 So if anyone needs
00:46:01 I am here for you.
00:46:07 - What a crock of shit.
00:46:11 He's real!
00:46:23 Miss Mann?
00:46:27 Come in, dear. Have a seat.
00:46:31 No, thanks.
00:46:34 What can I do for you,
00:46:37 I need to talk.
00:46:41 and I don't know
00:46:43 - Not feeling so fresh?
00:46:47 Feminine odorand itching
00:46:50 Uh, no. No, not that.
00:46:53 Then what is it?
00:46:57 I have a terrible secret.
00:47:00 Well, Cindy, we all have
00:47:06 Sometimes we do things
00:47:08 Some for money,
00:47:11 others to gain the athletic edge
00:47:15 Sometimes those secrets
00:47:17 - Aah!
00:47:19 Yes, I do, um, Miss Mann.
00:47:24 I mean, all your help.
00:47:28 Anytime, dear.
00:47:33 - Buffy, are you coming?
00:47:43 Red rum.
00:47:46 Hello?
00:47:55 Somebody there?
00:47:58 Hello!
00:48:03 Very funny.
00:48:07 Who put you up
00:48:09 Lose the cape.
00:48:14 Oh, so what movie is this from,
00:48:21 Wanna play psycho killer?
00:48:27 Oh, so this is where
00:48:31 Please, Mr. Killer,
00:48:38 So is this where
00:48:41 Oh, look,
00:48:46 Oh, yeah,
00:48:48 Okay. I'm running!
00:48:54 Help! Now I'm gonna fall
00:48:59 Aah!
00:49:03 There you go, Mr. Scary Killer.
00:49:06 Oh, God!
00:49:11 Oh, God, no!
00:49:13 No!
00:49:16 Oh, now what?
00:49:18 I guess this is the big climax.
00:49:26 Oh, look at me.
00:49:29 I'm a gross, scary severed head.
00:49:33 Do you know who I am? I'm Miss Teen.
00:49:37 And you got blood
00:49:41 Ah! I will not be ignored
00:49:45 - I'm gonna jump!
00:49:49 - No!
00:49:51 - Be reasonable.
00:49:55 or those greasy
00:49:58 - I'm going to end it all!
00:50:03 Now we know Bobby's not the killer.
00:50:06 I don't know.
00:50:08 If the killer
00:50:10 Because he's just
00:50:12 Don't you see?
00:50:15 We can't go to the police.
00:50:20 What are you
00:50:23 What are you waiting for?
00:50:26 What are you
00:50:28 What am I waiting for?
00:50:31 - What am I waiting for?
00:50:36 Fuck you!
00:50:38 Oh, my God.
00:50:40 Ray, I still don't think
00:50:43 - You know I'm not gonna
00:50:47 - Why can't we just
00:50:51 Huh? You like that?
00:50:58 - Hey! This is my song!
00:51:02 - You know they gave me
00:51:05 Every where l go
00:51:09 Ooh, Brenda.
00:51:11 Did I tell you how sexy you look
00:51:14 - I do, Ray?
00:51:17 I like it. Hey, get up.
00:51:25 Ooh! Yes, I like that.
00:51:28 - You like that? You like that?
00:51:31 - Hey, put this on with it.
00:51:35 - Ray, you are so freaky.
00:51:38 Go on. Pull it.
00:51:41 Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ah, ahh!
00:51:43 Yeah. Here. Put this on with it.
00:51:47 Goon.
00:51:50 - Are you sure?
00:51:55 - Okay.
00:52:00 - I like that look.
00:52:04 Here. Put this on with it.
00:52:07 Go on, girl. Put it on.
00:52:10 Yeah. Put that shit on there.
00:52:13 Do it. Yeah.
00:52:17 Come here, girl.
00:52:19 Full speed. Charge!
00:52:25 Yes! Yes!
00:52:27 Turn around! Come on!
00:52:29 Yes, Brendan!
00:52:32 - Who?
00:52:34 Put the helmet on.
00:52:37 - Come on! Come on!
00:52:40 I'm here at Lover's Lookout.
00:52:42 It's dark,
00:52:44 and it's where hormone-driven teens
00:52:48 So very likely we're about
00:52:51 Okay, sure enough,
00:52:55 Let's see if she'll have
00:52:57 Hi. Gail Hailstorm,
00:53:01 - Oh, yeah.
00:53:05 - Well, my name's Heather.
00:53:08 Well, yeah, sure.
00:53:13 and then we heard a noise out there,
00:53:15 but--well, that was,
00:53:18 Yeah, yeah. Has it crossed your
00:53:22 and you're about
00:53:26 - Really? No way!
00:53:30 - Heather, good luck.
00:53:32 - Just as I thought. The murder
00:53:36 I'm going to try and break
00:53:39 Excuse me. Heather, can you tell us
00:53:43 Lots of pain. Gail, please help me.
00:53:47 I'd like to help you out, kid,
00:53:50 You got a lot of nerve coming here.
00:53:53 - Get the camera off me now!
00:53:56 I'm gonna slice your head off
00:54:00 Oh, my God, Kenny!
00:54:05 Kenny! Oh, my God,
00:54:08 This man is chasin' Miss Gail.
00:54:17 I'm so scared right now.
00:54:21 I just want to say...
00:54:24 to the family
00:54:27 I am so sorry.
00:54:29 This was my interview,
00:54:32 my story.
00:54:36 It's all my fault.
00:54:43 - You want some popcorn?
00:54:50 - You want some chicken?
00:54:56 Mm-hmm. For all y'all talkers
00:55:01 Shh.
00:55:03 Shh, back at you. Shh!
00:55:08 Why they actin' already?
00:55:15 The largest ship
00:55:18 Its 400 passengers and crew
00:55:23 A journey that would change
00:55:26 Whoo!
00:55:31 I'm the king of the world!
00:55:38 Get your ass back down there, boy!
00:55:42 - I'm gonna go to
00:55:45 I gotta go to the bathroom.
00:55:48 Hurry up, man.
00:55:51 Back up!
00:55:55 You can move back some.
00:56:04 And they're off!
00:56:06 It's number three in the lead.
00:56:08 And number three
00:56:15 Number two has placed,
00:56:18 Next week's Triple Crown
00:56:21 Be here early.
00:56:49 Hey, who was that?
00:56:52 Go ahead.
00:57:07 Anon.
00:57:12 Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.
00:57:14 Mm-mmm!
00:57:21 Lord, I'm gonna have a heart attack!
00:57:25 Man, this is
00:57:27 Oh, I am scared!
00:57:30 - Excuse me.
00:57:36 - ...out of her favor--
00:57:39 - You can see her real hair right there!
00:57:42 I know you better
00:57:45 Outta my face!
00:57:48 This is all me up in here.
00:57:51 - Will you shut the fuck up!
00:57:53 Mmm, mmm.
00:57:57 Hey, baby.
00:58:01 She's about to get it on
00:58:04 - She dressing like a man--
00:58:07 Yeah, I got you.
00:58:11 You on Candid Camera now.
00:58:14 You ain't know that.
00:58:19 Hello. Hey, girl.
00:58:23 Shakespeare In Love.
00:58:28 For Christ's sake,
00:58:31 - Shut up!
00:58:33 I don't know why y'all
00:58:36 My girlfriend already seen the movie.
00:58:40 Give me that.
00:58:42 Right on.
00:58:45 Will you sit down.
00:58:47 Shut up.
00:58:50 Your ass is grass.
00:58:56 - This is for Thelma!
00:58:59 This is for talking
00:59:03 - You ruined Schindler's List.
00:59:05 - Boogie Nights!
00:59:12 Aaaaaahhhhh!
00:59:25 And I cannot marry the daughter
00:59:32 Um, you guys,
00:59:36 Oh, honey, please don't throw--
00:59:39 Hey! Hey, please!
00:59:42 - No, don't touch--Ah, no!
00:59:44 - Do you have more beer?
00:59:47 No, no, no, no!
01:00:11 Kitty, you scared me.
01:00:19 Horsey.
01:00:27 Hello?
01:00:32 Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
01:00:35 Please! I'm just a day player!
01:00:53 Oh, my God!
01:01:23 Chug! Chug! Chug!
01:01:26 Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!
01:01:32 Yeah!
01:01:36 Oh, Bobby. Bobby.
01:01:40 I thought the killer got to you
01:01:43 Could what?
01:01:44 I wanna go upstairs.
01:01:49 - Yeah.
01:01:53 - Hey, party on!
01:02:01 - So--
01:02:04 Here we are... again.
01:02:07 Yeah.
01:02:11 And, you know,
01:02:15 I'll understand.
01:02:17 Bobby.
01:02:19 I am ready.
01:02:23 - You are?
01:02:26 I can't keep fighting
01:02:31 I have to just
01:02:34 and let them flow.
01:02:36 Right.
01:02:38 - Bobby?
01:02:40 I have been so selfish.
01:02:45 This is like a scene
01:02:48 Only it isn't a movie, Bobby.
01:02:50 This is real life.
01:02:54 It's all a movie, baby.
01:02:56 There's the sound guy.
01:03:00 - Bobby?
01:03:03 What I mean
01:03:08 you have to enjoy
01:03:34 Mmm! Ow!
01:03:37 Bobby.
01:03:39 Bobby!
01:03:45 Can I tell you a secret?
01:03:48 Sure, man.
01:03:51 I see dead people.
01:03:54 Man, this shit is awesome!
01:03:58 Yo, son, we gotta roll
01:04:00 Ah, shit!
01:04:03 We don't have
01:04:05 We don't have
01:04:07 Oh, man!
01:04:15 Toke! Toke! Toke!
01:04:18 - Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke!
01:04:26 Oh, shit, son!
01:04:30 Toke! Toke! Toke! Toke!
01:04:36 - This some good shit!
01:05:02 - Bobby! I've never done this before.
01:05:06 It's okay. It's okay.
01:05:08 It's just like--
01:05:12 - A Tootsie Pop?
01:05:15 - Oh.
01:05:19 - Okay.
01:05:21 Show me now
01:05:25 How it feels
01:05:28 l'm afraid
01:05:32 We'll be waiting till forever
01:05:34 Oh! Jesus!
01:05:39 I never could wait
01:05:42 - You know what? Let me.
01:05:45 Goddamn!
01:05:51 l'm flyin' solo
01:05:56 Don't ask me why
01:06:00 Just kick back
01:06:02 Enjoy the ride
01:06:08 'Cause l'm a spaceman
01:06:13 Guess it's been a while.
01:06:17 So stay with me
01:06:21 Oh! Oops!
01:06:24 It's very, uh, '70s of you.
01:06:41 Oh, yeah.
01:06:49 Come here, Bobby!
01:06:52 Oh, man,
01:06:55 Yeah, me too, son.
01:06:58 Hey, you guys hear that?
01:07:04 Oh!
01:07:12 Shh!
01:07:15 Hello?
01:07:17 - Hello.
01:07:25 Let me talk to her. Shh!
01:07:29 I'm gonna gut you like a pig!
01:07:38 Oh, yeah! Oh!
01:07:41 Yeah! What's my name, Bobby?
01:07:43 What? Ah!
01:07:45 - What's my name, bitch?
01:07:49 Whose is it, Bobby?
01:07:52 It's yours.
01:07:54 Ahhhhhh!
01:07:58 Oh, my God!
01:08:05 Oh, shit!
01:08:12 Don't even contest
01:08:15 Like porn dancers
01:08:17 Hey, yo, l'm sick
01:08:21 Hey, yo, check it, yo.
01:08:23 l wanna smoke
01:08:25 And if l wanna fuck long
01:08:28 And then the song
01:08:30 Because the right way
01:08:34 - Whoo-hoo!
01:08:37 I'm gonna slash and gash
01:08:40 I spill blood on the walls
01:08:43 lf the phone rings
01:08:45 Gonna slit your throat
01:08:47 Peel your foreskin off
01:08:53 Yo!
01:08:56 That was the illest rhyme
01:09:02 Bobby...
01:09:06 - What?
01:09:10 What took you so long
01:09:12 Why you so curious?
01:09:15 I don't know.
01:09:17 I thought it would fit
01:09:20 if you turned out
01:09:23 Oh, so, what? You think
01:09:27 Buffy and Greg are dead?
01:09:31 - I thought you knew that.
01:09:32 Bobby, turn around!
01:09:50 Cindy!
01:09:52 - Oh, my God! Bobby! Bobby!
01:09:57 - Bobby, it's okay.
01:10:01 It's gonna be okay, Bobby.
01:10:05 Yo, wait for me!
01:10:08 There's ass, blood
01:10:10 Someone done gone crazy,
01:10:12 - We all go a little crazy sometimes.
01:10:18 Oh, shit, son!
01:10:21 Oh, my God!
01:10:26 Cindy, he shot me in the lungs.
01:10:30 You wanna hit this shit?
01:10:36 Ketchup.
01:10:38 Just like my mom puts on
01:10:43 Oh, my God! Ray, you've gotta help me!
01:10:47 Surprise!
01:10:49 Surprise, Cindy!
01:11:04 Why are you doing this, Bobby?
01:11:06 Why? Why? You hear that, Ray?
01:11:10 I think she wants
01:11:13 - Did Scream have a plot?
01:11:15 Did I Know What You Did Last Summer
01:11:18 Don't think so!
01:11:21 What about the sequel?
01:11:24 - I wanna kill that motherfucker.
01:11:27 How about this for a motive?
01:11:30 It can cause serious
01:11:33 - I thought you loved me.
01:11:37 I did. But abstinence can make you
01:11:41 That's right, Cindy. I'm gay.
01:11:43 And in case you haven't noticed,
01:11:48 What? I ain't gay.
01:11:50 - What are you talking about?
01:11:54 - What about our trip
01:12:00 - But you made love to me.
01:12:03 Whatever, Ray!
01:12:06 The point is, I'm a new man,
01:12:10 - So you killed all your friends?
01:12:14 Just you.
01:12:16 And maybe Shorty,
01:12:18 But here's the genius part.
01:12:21 We're copycatting a serial killer
01:12:24 - It's the perfect crime, Cindy.
01:12:28 Hang on to your seat, baby,
01:12:34 - I'll be back.
01:12:37 Move your big ass.
01:12:40 Dad!
01:12:42 What are you gonna do,
01:12:45 Nah. We're just havin' a little bit
01:12:49 The police are gonna find
01:12:52 and me and Ray are the only survivors
01:12:56 - You ready? I'm ready.
01:12:59 - Come on. Come on. All right.
01:13:02 - Come on!
01:13:04 Wait, wait, wait, wait.
01:13:07 - Ready? All right. Let's do this.
01:13:10 - Come on. Come on.
01:13:11 Give it to me!
01:13:13 No! Wait, wait,
01:13:15 - Remember what we talked about?
01:13:17 - How many times
01:13:19 Stop. Just--
01:13:21 - All right. I'm ready.
01:13:24 - Wait, wait, wait!
01:13:27 Stop acting like a little girl.
01:13:29 - You're right, you're right,
01:13:32 No! You guys are psychos!
01:13:35 You've seen
01:13:38 No! Watching television shows
01:13:42 Cancelin' TV shows does!
01:13:45 The Wayans Brothers
01:13:47 It was a good-ass show,
01:13:52 Take it easy!
01:13:55 It's my turn.
01:13:58 Fuck outta here.
01:14:09 Surprise, Cindy!
01:15:05 All right, all right.
01:15:08 Just give me a moment.
01:15:16 Oh, yeah. That's it.
01:15:19 Ah. Okay.
01:15:55 Dad!
01:15:57 Are you okay?
01:16:00 I thought I told you
01:16:03 But, Dad, you were here.
01:16:05 Oh, yeah, that's right. Did you get some
01:16:09 - Dad, they're dead.
01:16:12 What's that? Is that the cops?
01:16:15 Okay, okay, listen, honey.
01:16:17 Uh-- Uh-If the cops come, tell 'em
01:16:20 You had a leaky faucet, and you
01:16:30 No! No!
01:16:34 Dad, Dad, put your arms down.
01:16:38 - What the hell's goin' on here?
01:16:41 - He was right here! I swear it!
01:16:43 The killer!
01:16:47 And the sick bastard planted drugs
01:16:51 - All over the place.
01:16:54 All right, Cindy.
01:16:57 I'm cool, though, right?
01:16:59 - I'm okay?
01:17:01 Cindy. Call me.
01:17:05 Daddy'll get you out, honey.
01:17:09 Okay. Let's go over this again.
01:17:25 - You say it was an accident.
01:17:27 - He was on the road.
01:17:31 - It has to be him, Sheriff.
01:17:39 Here, Sheriff.
01:17:41 - That'll be all, Doofy.
01:17:44 - I'm gonna go, then. All right.
01:17:48 Bye, Cind.
01:17:53 I'm sorry, Cindy.
01:17:56 His name was David Keegan.
01:17:59 - He's buried in Lakewood Cemetery.
01:18:05 - Then I don't know who it could be.
01:18:07 who was connected with all the victims,
01:18:11 Someone who could move around
01:18:16 Oh, my God.
01:18:19 She used to baby-sit my brother Doofy.
01:18:23 It's me, Cind.
01:18:26 'Night, Cind.
01:18:32 - Doofy!
01:18:37 - Have you seen Doofy?
01:18:39 - Have you seen Doofy?
01:18:41 - No.
01:18:44 Doofy!
01:18:59 He walks alone
01:19:02 He always knows
01:19:06 He never shows what he's thinking
01:19:09 Because he's
01:19:13 He comes alive
01:19:17 He gets it right
01:19:20 He's got one eye open
01:19:24 And he's too cool for school
01:19:29 He's an operator
01:19:32 And if you mess with him
01:19:37 No-o-o-o-o!
01:19:56 Shit, son. Yo, what the deal?
01:19:59 Yo, if y'all watchin'
01:20:02 that means
01:20:04 Either I'm a prisoner,
01:20:08 But either way it goes,
01:20:13 Rule number one:
01:20:16 Rule number two:
01:20:19 And rule number three:
01:20:24 Y'all wish me luck.
01:20:27 Snatch and run, y'all!
01:20:31 Come back here, you motherfuckers!
01:27:33 This isn't easy for me.
01:27:36 I know we've been
01:27:39 but I found somebody else.
01:27:41 Okay? I'm in love.
01:27:45 Don't look at me like that!
01:27:48 We could still be friends.
01:27:50 You can come into my room
01:27:53 We just can't-- No.
01:27:58 No!
01:28:02 Okay, just one time.
01:28:11 Yeah. That's it!