Shortbus

en
00:02:33 Are you a top or a bottom?
00:02:36 I beg your pardon?
00:02:38 I mean in real life.
00:02:40 This is real life.
00:02:43 Let me put it this way:
00:02:45 Do you think we should get out of Iraq?
00:02:47 Is your daddy paying for this?
00:02:48 No.
00:02:52 You're taking a picture of yourself at Ground Zero --
00:02:55 do you smile?
00:02:57 Get on the fucking bed!
00:04:17 If you could have any superpower,
00:04:20 The power to make you interesting.
00:04:23 Do you think you'll ever have kids?
00:04:26 You only have an hour.
00:04:27 It's my money.
00:04:29 Well, you fucking trust fund ** piece of fetish shit!
00:04:32 I'm sorry!
00:04:33 I'm sorry what?
00:04:34 I'm sorry, Mistress Severin.
00:04:36 But I'm serious.
00:04:37 What are your thoughts on procreation?
00:04:40 I want to do it by myself,
00:04:43 in the dark.
00:04:44 Like a worm.
00:05:37 Can you describe your last orgasm?
00:05:39 It was great.
00:05:41 It was like time had stopped
00:05:52 Let's go, partner.
00:05:56 I'm gonna miss my fucking train.
00:06:21 Oh, God, oh.
00:06:25 Oh, easy, easy.
00:06:43 Were you sad afterwards?
00:06:48 Yeah.
00:06:50 Why?
00:06:52 Cause time hadn't stopped.
00:06:56 And I wasn't alone.
00:07:06 Hey hon, I'm home!
00:07:11 Hey.
00:07:12 You doing yoga?
00:07:14 Yeah.
00:07:15 Sorry, I would have been here sooner.
00:07:16 Somebody threw themselves in front of the L train.
00:07:22 Hey.
00:07:25 God, you're so sweaty.
00:07:26 I love it.
00:07:29 Wow!
00:07:32 You did?
00:07:35 Did you think of me?
00:07:40 I'll go put on some clothes.
00:07:45 This is recording!
00:07:46 Fuck!
00:07:51 When are you going to let me see
00:07:53 Soon.
00:08:08 Thank you.
00:08:11 Thank you...
00:08:14 cutie.
00:08:16 That was--
00:08:18 Definitely.
00:08:27 Look, I do feel sorry for people who don't have what we have.
00:08:34 Like Brad and Cheryl.
00:08:36 Brad and Cheryl?
00:08:38 Yeah, the couple I've been working with.
00:08:43 Can you keep a secret?
00:08:45 Of course I can keep a secret.
00:08:48 Yesterday Cheryl told me
00:08:55 She won't tell Brad because
00:08:58 So I finally told her what I think she should do.
00:09:00 What should she do?
00:09:02 She should keep faking.
00:09:05 It's a completely legitimate strategy to buy time.
00:09:08 Really?
00:09:09 Cause the thing is, if she tells Brad,
00:09:16 You know?
00:09:17 And the thing is, an orgasm
00:09:21 She has to claim it for herself.
00:09:26 What do you think?
00:09:29 What do you mean with,
00:09:50 Hi.
00:09:56 Jamie and Jamie.
00:09:59 Actually, I just started to call myself James again.
00:10:01 I'm sorry. I keep forgetting.
00:10:04 Jamie and James.
00:10:06 Tell me about yourselves.
00:10:09 Well, I'm Jamie Mitchell.
00:10:12 I was a child actor. I was on a
00:10:18 Where the rich black couple
00:10:21 and they didn't have the heart
00:10:24 "I'm an albino!"
00:10:27 I'm Canadian.
00:10:30 Well, Jamie and I met
00:10:33 for "Take him from the streets".
00:10:36 And -- James was -- well, he was --
00:10:40 escorting at the time.
00:10:43 James, what do you do now?
00:10:45 Well, I don't hustle any more.
00:10:46 Um, I guess I'm a...
00:10:48 He's a lifeguard.
00:10:50 Yeah, at a...
00:10:51 a gym jacuzzi.
00:10:54 Can you tell me why you're here?
00:10:56 Recently we started about opening up our relationship, you know.
00:11:00 Sexually.
00:11:02 I was a little surprised when Jamie mentioned that he wanted to do this,
00:11:07 and then I thought, well, we've been together five years,
00:11:10 and -- I mean, let's face it,
00:11:12 monogamy's for straight people.
00:11:14 But we thought we should get an impartial opinion from a sex therapist.
00:11:19 Dr Lin?
00:11:22 Actually I prefer the term "couples counselor".
00:11:24 Although I have a great deal of experience in sex therapy.
00:11:27 Jamie, I'm wondering --
00:11:31 Sure.
00:11:32 Leave us alone.
00:11:36 'K...
00:11:40 Thanks.
00:11:41 All right.
00:11:45 Why are you here?
00:11:50 Well, something did happen at work last week.
00:11:55 Um, would you mind if I taped myself talking about this?
00:12:00 See, I'm making this little film, and
00:12:04 Just me.
00:12:05 Sure, OK.
00:12:11 So I was at the gym last week...
00:12:44 Oh, Jesus!
00:12:45 There's something in there!
00:12:54 Can you help me?
00:13:36 What was that?
00:13:38 It must have been a brownout.
00:13:40 Are you OK?
00:13:41 Yeah, yeah.
00:13:42 Everything's fine.
00:13:43 You know, we're making some progress.
00:13:46 I got to hear from James,
00:13:54 Tell me what you need in your life right now.
00:13:58 Well, I need Jamie.
00:14:00 Besides James.
00:14:03 We love each other so much.
00:14:07 I just...
00:14:10 I don't want to lose him.
00:14:13 And I think about him and other guys,
00:14:16 and then I think about me and other guys,
00:14:19 and I think, maybe there's an opportunity here.
00:14:22 I mean, there's a lot of good and cute people in the world who don't have any love in their lives,
00:14:28 and I think we could help them.
00:14:31 Tell me what you need, in one sentence.
00:14:33 I love everybody.
00:14:34 That's not a need.
00:14:36 I need to love everybody.
00:14:43 Wait! Did you just hear me?
00:14:45 "I need to love everybody"?
00:14:47 How can I love everybody?
00:14:50 Wow! You're good!
00:14:52 Thank you!
00:14:54 Thank you!
00:14:55 Jamie, that's actually called a "false epiphany".
00:14:58 Come on, give me a break!
00:15:00 You don't just dole out the breakthroughs.
00:15:02 Well, you can!
00:15:03 Don't you give yourself a breakthrough?
00:15:04 I don't need a breakthrough.
00:15:05 You're not gonna give me the breakthrough?
00:15:07 I do not need a breakthrough.
00:15:08 We all need breakthroughs.
00:15:09 Well shut up and sit down!
00:15:10 You shut up! And I...
00:15:11 Sit down!
00:15:14 Oh my God. I...
00:15:16 I am so sorry.
00:15:19 I'm not gonna charge you for this session.
00:15:24 It's a...
00:15:30 I'm preorgasmic.
00:15:34 Does that mean you're about to have one?
00:15:37 No.
00:15:40 I've never had one.
00:18:06 Get the hell out of here.
00:18:07 Everybody hates you.
00:18:07 Do you know who I am?
00:18:09 Yes, I know who you are.
00:18:10 Dr Donuts.
00:18:11 Eat my twat, Dr Donuts!
00:18:12 Fuck you!
00:18:14 I hate carbs!
00:18:17 What are you looking at?
00:18:18 Nothing. Um--
00:18:19 Jamie and, um, James told me to come here.
00:18:22 What's your name?
00:18:24 Sophia.
00:18:25 Oh, Sophia! I'm Justin Bond.
00:18:28 Come on.
00:18:36 Do you know what a shortbus is?
00:18:37 No.
00:18:38 You've heard of the Big Yellow School Bus?
00:18:40 Well, this is the short one.
00:18:42 It's a salon for the gifted and challenged.
00:18:45 Hi-ha!
00:18:47 That's Alice. She's got a cunt like a wizard's sleeve.
00:18:51 This place has really taken off in the last few years,
00:18:52 since all these young people started flocking to the city.
00:18:55 Why would they come to New York?
00:18:57 9-11.
00:18:58 It's the only thing real that's ever happened to them.
00:19:02 Now in here is our performance room.
00:19:04 But tonight we're having a film festival.
00:19:06 They're boring as hell, but I've found the more boring they are,
00:19:09 the more intelligent people think they are. But watch.
00:19:17 "I'm an albino!"
00:19:20 Oh, there's the Jamies.
00:19:24 Hey. Mmm. Good to see you.
00:19:25 Hi James.
00:19:29 I'm so glad you came.
00:19:31 I said to switch the films. We're gonna do
00:19:35 That sounds like a real weenie shrinker.
00:19:36 Come on, let's go get laid.
00:19:38 You're gonna be all right?
00:19:39 Yeah.
00:19:42 What's the matter?
00:19:43 Nothing.
00:19:45 Are you sure you wanna try this tonight?
00:19:49 No, that's too late.
00:19:52 Are you OK with it?
00:19:53 Yeah...
00:19:57 If you find somebody and I don't,
00:20:02 But if I find somebody and you don't,
00:20:05 No, don't do that.
00:20:08 I spend half of my time blowing the NYPD to keep this place open.
00:20:11 I barely have any time for myself.
00:20:13 Here's the sex *** room.
00:20:17 Aren't they beautiful?
00:20:30 It's not your average sort of Friday night event,
00:20:34 Last week we had some people in here,
00:20:37 'cause you know, this is my house...
00:21:23 Oh, this is Creamy.
00:21:25 Pleased to meet you.
00:21:28 No, I'm fine, thank you.
00:21:29 Well, then maybe some blondies.
00:21:32 the pot corn isn't.
00:21:33 Excuse me.
00:21:34 Pot corn.
00:21:35 These are actually not all for me.
00:21:37 Why don't you come in and have a look?
00:21:39 After all, voyeurism is participation.
00:21:46 Well?
00:21:48 Now come on.
00:21:51 These bitches in there. Eating asses and sucking cock,
00:21:54 and then they show up at the buffet and say they're vegan.
00:21:57 Hi.
00:21:58 Any bites?
00:22:00 No.
00:22:01 I love these little gadgets.
00:22:02 Oh, this is Sophia.
00:22:04 You know the Jamies?
00:22:05 I love the Jamies!
00:22:08 Do you think you could introduce me to them?
00:22:09 Yeah, probably.
00:22:11 I'm Ceth, with a C.
00:22:13 Hmm?
00:22:16 It's not funny!
00:22:19 Why can't they leave my pussy alone?
00:22:20 What is that?
00:22:22 That's the "yenta 650".
00:22:25 How does it work?
00:22:26 I put in my profile...
00:22:27 "I got a match for you!"
00:22:31 Hi.
00:22:37 That's actually Ceth. So you're 1.9 meters tall?
00:22:42 Do you know?
00:22:44 Canada. - Oh really?
00:22:47 6 1/2. So that makes...
00:22:50 Oh my God!
00:22:51 Maybe we can talk about this if we sit?
00:22:53 Yeah, I'll be right there.
00:22:55 Is my hair OK?
00:22:57 Yeah, it's fine.
00:23:01 Thanks.
00:23:03 Sophia, come sit with us.
00:23:05 OK.
00:23:08 You make it sound like the Loch Ness monster.
00:23:11 It doesn't seem like it should be so hard to find.
00:23:14 It is so elusive, you know.
00:23:18 It's not necessary for procreation, is it?
00:23:20 It only seems to appear in a handful of species
00:23:22 like the rabbit, the ferret,
00:23:27 "I'm an albino!"
00:23:30 Thanks.
00:23:31 Well I am, so it meant a lot to me.
00:23:34 Oh, that means a lot to me, actually.
00:23:37 Hey.
00:23:39 Hey.
00:23:40 You gonna be around later?
00:23:41 Sure.
00:23:45 Sorry. Go on.
00:23:46 You know, I feel like we're inundated by images
00:23:48 of these super deluxe babes in the throes of the ultimate orgasm...
00:23:51 I think it's just some myth to sell more magazines.
00:23:55 Whoa, myth? Did you just say that
00:24:00 Yeah.
00:24:01 I'm here to tell you, sister, they're not.
00:24:04 I've seen them happen before.
00:24:06 Shabbos, Sophia.
00:24:08 Hey kids.
00:24:10 Nice to meet you.
00:24:12 and if you're Jewish
00:24:17 I'm agnostic.
00:24:18 Do you like performance art?
00:24:19 Yeah, I do.
00:24:20 OK, I'm gonna do a show soon, and I think that you should come to it.
00:24:22 Might be a sort of therapeutic for your little problem.
00:24:24 Excuse me?
00:24:25 I have to say I find the fact that you can't have an orgasm completely unacceptable.
00:24:29 I would really like to work with you.
00:24:31 Shabbos!
00:24:32 Maybe I can help her!
00:24:33 You know, I'm sort of like a orgasmic superhero.
00:24:35 "Have I got a match for you? Oy, **! Oy, sheyne ponim! Sheyne ponim at 11 o'clock! Come on, just get off and go! Why so picky?"
00:24:43 Shit!
00:24:44 Sir, I'm so sorry. Are you OK?
00:24:47 My pacemaker. This odd vibration.
00:24:51 I'm so sorry.
00:24:52 No, no...
00:24:53 I think that was my Yenta.
00:24:55 Your-- your who?
00:24:59 Don't I know you from somewhere?
00:25:02 Well...
00:25:04 I used to be the mayor of New York.
00:25:11 Oh my God.
00:25:12 It's called "Ode to the female secretion",
00:25:14 and it works in five different movements:
00:25:16 Lubrication, Lactation,
00:25:19 Ejaculation --which is my favorite--,
00:25:21 then Urinatinon and Menstruation.
00:25:22 I think my throat's closing.
00:25:24 I can't use the last two.
00:25:25 Are you a really heavy bleeder?
00:25:26 On my second and third days.
00:25:28 That's so hot.
00:25:31 You know, I use menstrual blood as makeup in my show.
00:25:33 Tampons. Just pull them right out, fresh from the fruit, and use it as lipstick.
00:25:37 It's a period piece.
00:25:39 You're kidding.
00:25:41 I should really use that in the show.
00:25:44 Would you be interested in doing that?
00:25:46 You mean, donating... my...
00:25:47 Some of your menstrual blood for my face.
00:25:50 Oh, come on now!
00:25:51 What?
00:25:51 Join the line!
00:25:54 Did that make you...
00:25:56 because you're a little baby homo.
00:25:58 Does this really have to do with an orgasm?
00:26:00 It comes from her fucking pussy,
00:26:01 why are you so fucking uncomfortable about it?
00:26:02 I can deal with pussies!
00:26:03 I'm around them all the time!
00:26:05 I'm not talking about your fucking boyfriend.
00:26:08 Get off of me!
00:26:10 You got a boner!
00:26:12 That's my cellphone, you fucking albino butch faggot!
00:26:14 Want to fuck me there with your mangina?
00:26:17 *** just for cockfucking me, you fucking dick.
00:26:27 Hi.
00:26:29 Are you OK?
00:26:32 There's just, uh...
00:26:33 lots of, uh...
00:26:34 Men?
00:26:36 Yes.
00:26:37 My name is Bitch.
00:26:39 Hi Bitch.
00:26:40 You are?
00:26:41 Sophia.
00:26:43 Hey, sister. Sit down.
00:26:44 You're in the right place.
00:26:46 You're in the Pussy Palace.
00:26:49 So you're a sex therapist
00:26:52 Actually I prefer the term "couples counselor".
00:26:54 Have you ever been with a woman?
00:26:56 Uh, no, you know--
00:27:00 Rob's the only person I've ever been with.
00:27:02 Wow.
00:27:03 My god.
00:27:04 You must have some major blue clit.
00:27:08 Did you do those PC muscle exercises?
00:27:10 You know, the PC muscle that controls your pee?
00:27:12 So when you're peeing next time,
00:27:14 squeeze it up and then let it go.
00:27:18 That's good for your orgasms.
00:27:19 I'm doing it right now.
00:27:21 Can you guys tell from my face?
00:27:23 May I ask you a question?
00:27:24 I wanna know what did your very orgasm feel like.
00:27:32 Welcome to Lifetime Television.
00:27:34 It's all about your pussies.
00:27:35 This is gonna sound really cheesy, but
00:27:41 and it was merging with other people's energy,
00:27:49 Wow.
00:27:52 Well, mine was definitely with Little Prince.
00:27:55 We had this incredible connection.
00:27:57 We just like made it really slow and still,
00:28:01 and I felt like I was finally not alone.
00:28:08 Mine felt like I was talking with the gods or something.
00:28:12 Shut the fuck up.
00:28:13 Excuse me?
00:28:14 Sophia, if you've never had an orgasm,
00:28:17 then how does it feel like
00:28:21 Great.
00:28:25 Yeah. Sex is really awesome.
00:28:27 I love sex.
00:28:31 Sex feels terrific.
00:28:34 I love it. A lot.
00:28:36 It's a great workout.
00:28:39 And I love loving my husband.
00:28:40 It's just, there comes a point sometimes where it gets a lot of pressure
00:28:45 and kinda like,
00:28:47 it feels a little bit,
00:28:50 like somebody's gonna kill me,
00:28:52 and I just have to smile
00:28:57 And that way I can survive.
00:29:05 Fuck, Severin.
00:29:06 Excuse me, that was totally inappropriate.
00:29:09 Don't mind her.
00:29:38 But you know what's the most wonderful thing about New York?
00:29:40 What?
00:29:41 It's where everyone comes to get fucked.
00:29:45 It's one of the last places where people are still willing to bend over
00:29:48 to let in the new.
00:29:53 And the old.
00:30:06 New Yorkers are... permeable.
00:30:10 You know what I mean?
00:30:11 Yeah.
00:30:13 You sure are?
00:30:16 Therefore we're sane.
00:30:18 Consequently, we're the target of the impermeable.
00:30:30 And of course, New York is where everyone comes to be forgiven.
00:30:40 What have you done wrong?
00:30:51 Tell me, how have you sinned?
00:30:57 I'm sure it's nothing serious.
00:30:59 How would you know?
00:31:00 Well, I'm-- I'm sure you did your best.
00:31:08 Imagine if you grew up here like I did.
00:31:16 Home can be very unforgiving.
00:31:25 It's true.
00:31:27 People said I didn't do enough
00:31:32 to help prevent the AIDS crisis
00:31:35 because I was in the closet.
00:31:42 That's not true.
00:31:44 I did the best I could.
00:31:49 I was--
00:31:52 I was scared
00:31:56 and--
00:31:59 impermeable.
00:32:03 Everybody knew so little then.
00:32:11 I know even less now.
00:34:02 Chip?
00:34:12 No, I'm OK.
00:34:19 Who's that?
00:34:21 If he's wearing a blue shirt, it's me.
00:34:24 It's you.
00:34:27 I made that for him.
00:34:28 Oh yeah?
00:34:29 That's Jamie there on the back.
00:34:31 Oh my God.
00:34:33 Shut up, that's so cute!
00:34:36 How old are you guys?
00:34:38 Seven.
00:34:39 Six.
00:34:42 Somewhere around there.
00:34:49 I think I'm actually gonna go.
00:34:52 What? No!
00:34:54 Yeah.
00:34:55 No, it's OK. It's cool.
00:34:56 Are you sure?
00:34:57 No.
00:34:58 Yeah.
00:35:01 Hang out for a while.
00:35:03 OK.
00:35:04 Come on.
00:35:32 How do I be a model?
00:35:36 A lot of it's instinct, to be honest.
00:35:38 But there are some basics.
00:35:40 The way I like to think about it, it's like geometry.
00:35:42 Like lines and angles.
00:36:04 I like that.
00:36:07 That's perfect. That's like an ad right there.
00:36:11 See, you got it.
00:36:14 Whatever, I hate it. It totally sucks.
00:36:32 James?
00:36:33 Yeah?
00:36:35 Can you actually use your other hand?
00:36:37 'Cause I usually command it from a different angle.
00:36:40 Sure.
00:36:44 How's that?
00:36:45 That's fine.
00:36:55 That feels really good.
00:36:57 What?
00:36:58 Huh?
00:37:00 Just say something.
00:37:02 Make more sounds.
00:37:04 "I'm an albino!"
00:37:07 "I'm an albino!"
00:37:09 "I'm an albino!"
00:37:12 "O say, can you see"
00:37:16 "by the dawn’s early li-i-i-i-i-ight"
00:37:22 "O say, does that
00:37:33 "O’er the land of the free-e-e-e-eee"
00:37:43 "and the home of the b-rave?"
00:37:55 Is that the first time somebody sang the National Anthem in your ass?
00:37:58 No.
00:38:30 OK, rotate.
00:38:36 Carpet burn.
00:38:52 Jamie, can I watch you fuck him?
00:40:46 I want you.
00:40:50 You. You. You.
00:41:36 That's it.
00:41:39 Fuck...
00:42:02 Fuck!
00:42:13 Rob!
00:42:14 What?
00:42:15 It's too loud!
00:42:17 No, it's not.
00:42:18 It is!
00:42:18 It's not!
00:42:19 It is!
00:42:19 It's not too loud!
00:42:20 I can't concentrate!
00:42:21 I'm looking for a job, OK?
00:42:22 What kind of a job, a hand job?
00:42:24 For Christ's sake, turn the fucking music off!
00:42:26 And look at this place.
00:42:27 I just got the fucking cleaners in here yesterday!
00:42:30 These are my dried cranberries--
00:42:32 And you bought everything in this house!
00:42:37 Fuck - you!
00:42:41 We agreed to come from a place of love.
00:42:52 I feel your warm and loving hands.
00:42:57 And I feel worried that you think I'm ugly.
00:43:01 Because why else would you be doing that on the computer.
00:43:04 I'm squeezing your perfectly round shoulders,
00:43:06 following to your clavicle and your collarbone,
00:43:09 so you know that you're incredibly attractive.
00:43:12 I think you're incredibly sexy.
00:43:14 And I'm just distracting myself.
00:43:17 I feel the sleeves of your T-shirt.
00:43:20 They're dry against my clammy hands.
00:43:22 Your skin is perfect
00:43:23 like I could never get this on a computer.
00:43:25 'Cause I'm just-- blocked.
00:43:26 Totally. We're both blocked, and--
00:43:29 Oh god, that feels good.
00:43:30 Really?
00:43:31 Shit, I'm so crunchy up there.
00:43:35 How about you unblock these beautiful breasts?
00:43:37 Your pertinent nipples.
00:43:39 "Pertinent"?
00:43:40 Very relevant.
00:43:41 Aw! Jeez!
00:43:42 I am not a cow!
00:43:44 I know you're not a cow, baby--
00:43:46 It felt that way.
00:43:47 It felt like I was a cow.
00:43:50 You wanna know why?
00:43:53 Can we try it again?
00:43:55 I'm feeling your strong biceps.
00:43:57 They're so tender and smooth.
00:44:02 Oh god, when you flex them,
00:44:04 they're just like breasts.
00:44:07 I feel the delicate wisps of your receding hairline...
00:44:10 I'm not balding.
00:44:11 Yes you are, honey. You are.
00:44:14 And I love your balding, virile head.
00:44:19 I feel really small.
00:44:20 That's because we are small.
00:44:21 We're so very small.
00:44:23 No!
00:44:26 I'm saying that I feel small.
00:44:29 I feel like I can't take up enough space.
00:44:33 I feel like my cock isn't big enough for you.
00:44:35 This is your issue, and you have to own it.
00:44:37 Because I am not a size queen,
00:44:39 I can't bring home any money.
00:44:42 I love the fact that you deliver Meals on Wheels.
00:44:45 You volunteer. It's beautiful.
00:44:47 Bullshit. I can't even give you an orgasm.
00:44:52 Yes, you... many times you have.
00:44:54 Bullshit!
00:44:55 I think we can get over this.
00:44:57 We can work this through. We've been through a lot of stuff together.
00:45:00 I can't give you an orgasm!
00:45:15 Hello?
00:45:16 Hi. Is this Severin?
00:45:19 Yeah.
00:45:20 Hey. It's Sophia.
00:45:35 So, do you like to jerk off?
00:45:38 Of course I do.
00:45:42 What are you doing with the cigarette in here?
00:45:45 Please, put that out!
00:45:47 This is a non-smoking environment.
00:45:49 That's totally absurd.
00:45:52 It's like a dream smoking environment.
00:45:54 You're gonna kill us in here.
00:45:56 That feels good.
00:45:57 Thank you.
00:45:59 What about your husband, has he ever tried to get you off?
00:46:01 This is not about Rob?
00:46:03 70% of all women have trouble achieving an orgasm.
00:46:06 70% of all men are assholes.
00:46:07 He's not an asshole, he's a great guy.
00:46:08 If it wasn't for Rob, I'd still be a bank teller.
00:46:11 He totally changed my life around.
00:46:12 He's my best friend.
00:46:14 Why is it so important for you to have an orgasm anyway?
00:46:17 I mean, it feels good, but it's not gonna save your life.
00:46:20 I wanna be welcomed into the secret society of women.
00:46:23 I was never a brownie.
00:46:25 God, I want to be able to save my marriage.
00:46:27 What does it have to do with your marriage?
00:46:29 It has a lot to do with--
00:46:31 Like, I can only come if it's my own hand.
00:46:33 It has everything to do, because
00:46:38 No you don't.
00:46:40 Have you even had a relationship?
00:46:48 So were you like, abused as a child?
00:46:52 No.
00:46:53 Were you?
00:46:54 No!
00:46:56 I come from a very traditional Chinese Canadian family.
00:46:58 I love Chinese Canadian food, but what does that have to do with it?
00:47:01 Chinese families are very strict.
00:47:05 My mom was a disciplinarian,
00:47:08 and my father... was...
00:47:11 my father was a great guy.
00:47:13 Did he touch you?
00:47:16 No, he didn't touch me.
00:47:18 He didn't touch anyone, ever.
00:47:20 Oh I see. Like, "My father wasn't there,
00:47:22 I can't feel anything between the legs."
00:47:24 You are so far behind you think you're first.
00:47:28 God, he was alway there for me.
00:47:30 It's just-- he was always there for me, that was the problem.
00:47:32 He was always watching me.
00:47:36 Watching you how?
00:47:39 You want me to say he raped me without touching me?
00:47:41 Well, did he?
00:47:44 Did he?
00:47:45 You don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
00:47:47 I'm sorry.
00:47:49 Domination, black and white-- it's not as simple.
00:47:53 Are you saying that I can't understand your relationship with your father who "watched you",
00:47:56 because I'm a dominatrix?
00:48:00 Well, yes!
00:48:01 That's really funny, because you're a sex therapist
00:48:03 and you can't have an orgasm.
00:48:05 You should be in...
00:48:07 I am not one of your clients who pays to be dominated!
00:48:10 Sophia, this is like the best conversation I've had over years.
00:48:12 Let go of my arm!
00:48:14 I won't grab you.
00:48:16 Please, I'm--
00:48:19 Sometimes when I get uncomfortable, I get mean.
00:48:22 You are not gonna keep me keen by treating me mean.
00:48:25 Look, I know I can help you have an orgasm.
00:48:27 And maybe you can help me having a real human interaction with someone?
00:48:32 Maybe we could meet here every week for an hour.
00:48:35 I'm in a crisis.
00:48:37 All right, every night this week, starting tomorrow.
00:48:44 You're sitting all by yourself.
00:48:47 And you look up, and there he is.
00:48:50 With his lunch tray.
00:48:52 What's his name again?
00:48:53 Phil.
00:48:55 Phil Mudd.
00:48:58 Severin's not my real name.
00:49:02 What is your real name?
00:49:06 So Phil Mudd says, "Is anyone sitting here?"
00:49:11 And you say, "No one's ever sat here."
00:49:15 OK, I'm going down.
00:49:21 Feel the thought first.
00:49:26 Just whisper it to me.
00:49:32 I can't do it.
00:49:34 Oh, Phil!
00:49:36 I want you to see his lunch tray.
00:49:40 It's got a carton of homogenized milk.
00:49:44 Pour that all over you.
00:49:47 Look at his Converse.
00:49:52 OK, if you can't say it,
00:49:55 Feel the thought first.
00:50:08 All right. You gotta pull the bus over.
00:50:17 Jennifer.
00:50:20 That's a lovely name.
00:50:25 Oh Jennifer.
00:50:29 What's your last name?
00:50:37 Aniston?
00:50:45 Jennifer Aniston.
00:50:49 There's room for two in this world.
00:50:52 Good going! It's OK! It's all right!
00:50:57 Good work today, Jennifer.
00:52:24 It's a remote-controlled vibrating egg.
00:52:28 Where'd you get this?
00:52:30 That's not important.
00:52:35 OK, so here's the plan:
00:52:36 We'll mingle separately to see what we can experience safely,
00:52:40 and once in a while, I want you to check in with me
00:52:43 with this.
00:52:45 Jesus Christ, Sophia!
00:52:46 I want you to have control.
00:52:51 or if you just wanna check in and say "Hey",
00:52:57 Come on, it'll be fun!
00:52:58 It'll be hot.
00:53:03 Come back, bitch!
00:53:06 That's "Bumble bee kisses".
00:53:08 Oh, that's nice.
00:53:41 It's just like the 60s, only with less hope.
00:53:46 See anything you like?
00:53:47 Oh Jesus. It's a lot of stuff that I'm seeing. It's incredible.
00:53:52 For a minute I thought that man didn't have an arm.
00:53:55 So, how's the big O coming?
00:53:59 Oh, everybody's talking about it.
00:54:00 Everybody here knows.
00:54:06 You're sitting up here in your corner
00:54:08 I mean, sweetheart, you gotta loosen up a little bit.
00:54:12 I mean, you have nice boobs.
00:54:14 You've got what it takes, sweetheart, what's the holdup?
00:54:17 I think I have some sort of clog in my neural pathways
00:54:21 somewhere between my brain and my clitoris.
00:54:24 That's disgusting.
00:54:26 No, I'm serious.
00:54:27 Don't think of it as a clog.
00:54:28 Think of it as some sort of magical circuit board.
00:54:35 That touches you, that touches me, that connects everybody.
00:54:38 You just have to find the right connection, the right circuitry.
00:54:42 Look at all these people out there.
00:54:43 They're trying to find the right connection.
00:54:45 And I personally expect a few blown fuses
00:54:48 before the night is over.
00:54:49 And maybe one of them will be yours.
00:54:53 Are you suggesting that Rob and I aren't compatible sexually?
00:54:57 Who the hell is Rob?
00:54:58 My husband.
00:54:59 Well, where is he right now?
00:55:00 I don't know.
00:55:02 Well, then it's time to play.
00:55:04 You've got the whole world. It's your playground. What do you think it will take?
00:55:09 Maybe somebody who's just starting to explore their sexuality, somebody...
00:55:13 Like a child?
00:55:16 No.
00:55:17 Not a child.
00:55:18 I'm not recommending it. I'm just asking.
00:55:21 I'm just trying to help you, dear.
00:55:24 You're touching my thigh.
00:55:25 Oh, I'm sorry.
00:55:26 It's OK.
00:55:28 I don't mind.
00:55:33 Hey-- OK. What if I asked you, um-- if I can kiss you?
00:55:39 Well, I don't know, I mean...
00:55:41 I get really scared sometimes, but...
00:55:45 all right, if you want to, but...
00:55:52 OK.
00:56:15 Wow. That was fast.
00:56:17 No, it's my husband.
00:56:19 He's trying to communicate with me.
00:56:30 Oh my godness, how sad! Do you want a hug?
00:56:37 Jesus, do you have a cellphone in your twat?
00:56:39 No, it's-- um, he's got the remote control.
00:56:41 It's... this... vibrating, uh...
00:56:45 OK, lady. Well, you know, best of luck, thanks for everything,
00:56:51 as my dear departed friend Lotus Weinstock used to say:
00:56:54 "I used to want to change the world.
00:56:57 "Now I just want to leave the room with a little dignity."
00:57:00 Excuse me while I crawl out of here.
00:57:16 That's fun.
00:57:20 Are you guys hard?
00:57:22 I get something to drink. I'll be right back.
00:57:29 Wow. So weird.
00:57:32 He's awesome.
00:57:37 Do you think that...
00:57:39 What?
00:57:43 I don't know, I mean,
00:57:48 but they're mostly in Berkeley.
00:57:51 What do you think?
00:57:52 I don't know.
00:57:53 He's great.
00:57:54 And I think we'll learn to do a lot, you know.
00:57:58 That's good. It's a good thing.
00:58:04 What?
00:58:05 It's a good thing?
00:58:06 Yeah!
00:58:08 What's a good thing?
00:58:12 I just think...
00:58:13 Do you hear yourself?
00:58:14 Do you even know what you're saying any more?
00:58:16 'Cause I don't.
00:58:19 I'm sick of having to drag every little thing out of you.
00:58:24 I mean--
00:58:26 I know you get depressed, but come on!
00:58:30 I'm trying!
00:58:38 Do you love me?
00:58:42 You don't love me any more?
00:59:02 Severin! Wait up!
00:59:03 Wait!
00:59:13 Ohhhhh!
00:59:15 How's it going?
00:59:17 Pretty great.
00:59:19 You had an orgasm?
00:59:21 No, but-- I made out with somebody.
00:59:24 Who?
00:59:25 Justin Bond.
00:59:28 He's an homosexual!
00:59:29 Apparently not.
00:59:31 Oh my god.
00:59:32 Well, he's really cute.
00:59:33 Yeah, he is.
00:59:35 I saw Rob, by the way.
00:59:40 Yeah. What was he up to?
00:59:42 He was getting fucked up the ass.
00:59:46 It was really intense.
00:59:48 Oh god.
00:59:51 I'm just kidding.
00:59:54 You brat!
00:59:59 I should probably go find him.
01:00:03 What's with him?
01:00:05 That fucking trust fund muppet Jesse is
01:00:09 like the longest relationship I've ever had.
01:00:13 You deserve so much more, Jennifer.
01:00:15 Thank you, but I can't respond to that name yet.
01:00:18 I'm sorry.
01:00:25 I can't do it any more.
01:00:29 I can't...
01:00:31 I just like...
01:00:32 wanna have like a house, a cat,
01:00:40 I'm sorry.
01:00:41 No, you shouldn't apologize.
01:00:43 I'm glad that you're telling me these things.
01:00:45 I want to hear you say these things.
01:00:47 I'm gonna save up all my money,
01:00:49 and then I'm just gonna make art for a year. Nothing else.
01:00:54 I know you can do it.
01:00:55 But everything's so fucking expensive!
01:00:58 I don't even know if I can afford to live in New York any more.
01:01:01 Where would I go, Fresno?
01:01:10 It's OK.
01:01:14 Your skin is so soft.
01:01:51 Jesus.
01:01:52 Rob.
01:01:53 Hi, Rob.
01:02:00 Oh my god.
01:02:05 Oh, man.
01:02:11 Oh god.
01:02:23 Don't move.
01:02:46 I'm so sorry.
01:02:51 It's OK.
01:02:52 I'm sorry.
01:02:53 Don't apologize.
01:03:04 I just-- I'm like, so sensitive.
01:03:09 I should find Rob.
01:03:13 You can tell me all about it tomorrow.
01:03:18 Actually, um--
01:03:22 I can't make it tomorrow, but I will give you a call.
01:03:28 I'll give you a call. Later this week.
01:03:51 Christ.
01:03:52 Truth or dare?
01:03:53 Truth.
01:03:54 Out of everyone here, who would you want to make out with the most?
01:04:00 No one.
01:04:01 What?
01:04:04 OK, spin.
01:04:11 Dare.
01:04:12 You and Severin have to go in that closet.
01:04:15 You do whatever the fuck you want to to her, for five minutes. While we take a pee break.
01:04:25 Oh my god.
01:04:41 I'm not gonna make out with you, OK?
01:04:45 I'm James.
01:04:46 Severin.
01:04:52 What is that?
01:04:54 It's my film.
01:04:57 What is it about?
01:05:02 I have a hard time saying.
01:05:05 Are you showing it here tonight?
01:05:09 I don't know.
01:05:11 What are you guys doing in there?
01:05:15 I hate him.
01:05:17 He can be a lot worse.
01:05:21 At least he's cute.
01:05:23 That's pretty unusual.
01:05:26 What's pretty unusual?
01:05:28 I never had a john that cute.
01:05:38 You know how we got started?
01:05:40 How?
01:05:41 After watching "My own private Idaho".
01:05:45 I grew up in a small town, so I didn't know where to go.
01:05:49 So I waited outside the theater where it was playing.
01:05:52 I waited for somebody to come out.
01:05:55 And that's where I met my first john.
01:05:57 So was it choice?
01:06:01 Yeah.
01:06:04 I loved it actually.
01:06:07 I knew exactly what I was worth.
01:06:10 You know?
01:06:13 Exactly what I had to contribute.
01:06:15 What was like, the most you ever made in a day?
01:06:21 Well, with cab fare--
01:06:24 $389.
01:06:28 That's pretty good for a small town.
01:06:35 You're with that guy who looks just like you, right?
01:06:37 Yeah.
01:06:40 He's cute. He looks like a jelly bean.
01:06:44 Yeah.
01:06:47 He's great, actually.
01:06:53 I never let him fuck me.
01:06:57 I never let anybody fuck me.
01:07:08 What are you guys doing in there?
01:07:17 You're an artist.
01:07:18 No. I suck.
01:07:20 Hey, me too.
01:07:23 Do you take that camera everywhere you go?
01:07:25 Yeah, something like that.
01:07:38 Are you OK?
01:07:46 Why are you crying?
01:07:56 I look back to things that were when I was 12 years old.
01:08:02 I'm still looking for the same things now.
01:08:15 Time's up.
01:08:24 Hey, what are you doing?
01:08:25 I'm looking for my husband.
01:08:26 I just found mine.
01:08:28 Both of them. I'm totally in love with them.
01:08:32 I hope they know it's gonna have to be a monogamous relationship.
01:08:36 What the fuck do you think you're doing?
01:08:38 Who are you?
01:08:39 Who the fuck are you?
01:08:40 I'm Ceth. Is there a problem?
01:08:41 You're not funny.
01:08:42 I thought it was kinda funny.
01:08:43 No you're not. And you're a horrible therapist.
01:08:46 Listen to me: James and Jamie are perfect.
01:08:49 Just leave them alone.
01:08:50 I think you need to leave.
01:08:51 No. I think you're fucking with something very pivotal to them and to me.
01:08:53 Just walk away!
01:08:54 Fuck you!
01:08:55 You motherfucker!
01:08:56 OK, OK.
01:09:00 Timeout, timeout.
01:09:02 Sorry, I--
01:09:06 Are you OK?
01:09:07 I've got an egg vibrating between my legs!
01:09:29 What the fuck is going on in here?
01:09:32 Hey. Are you OK?
01:09:36 You gave it away?
01:09:37 I just misplaced it.
01:09:39 I know you're hurt.
01:09:40 I am not hurt. I am furious!
01:09:42 I totally honor your feelings, but I want you to own them.
01:09:45 Shut up with your "honoring your feelings".
01:09:47 Because I know what I own,
01:09:50 you balding impotent liar!
01:09:53 Right, sister!
01:09:57 All right, show's over.
01:10:01 Hey.
01:10:24 Fuck! Fuck!
01:12:57 Yes. I--I need an ambulance.
01:12:59 I'm at the Palestra Gym. It's on 99...
01:14:28 Hello?
01:14:29 Who is this?
01:14:34 Oh. Hey. How are you?
01:14:38 Do I know you?
01:14:42 No.
01:14:46 Did you follow me?
01:14:49 Why would you wanna do that to yourself?
01:14:56 James-- Yes, I followed you to the gym.
01:15:05 Why?
01:15:07 Let's not talk about this on the phone.
01:15:09 What does your afternoon look like?
01:15:14 I'm looking for a friend. His last name is Baysin.
01:15:21 B-A-Y-
01:15:24 What do you mean, he checked himself out?
01:15:27 So what do you want?
01:15:29 I want to be restrained, but I don't want to totally lose control.
01:15:32 Good.
01:15:33 'Cause I can't be bothered to tie you up.
01:15:35 Turn over and hold the headbar. If you let go, I'll leave.
01:15:44 You never asked your wife to do this?
01:15:46 I guess she wouldn't understand.
01:15:49 All right.
01:15:51 This one's for her.
01:15:58 And I told Brad, "I think you're confusing me with someone who hurt you."
01:16:03 And he said, "No, Cheryl, you're hurting me."
01:16:10 Right?
01:16:12 And that was an eye opener for me.
01:16:18 And whenever I brought up my gastrointestinal problem...
01:16:37 When did you start watching me?
01:16:42 Um, a couple of years ago.
01:16:46 I work right out of here.
01:16:47 I proofread for a living.
01:16:51 I don't have cable.
01:16:53 I remember watching Jamie cut your hair.
01:16:59 It just seemed like fun.
01:17:02 And you were always my favorite,
01:17:04 because you were sad.
01:17:09 Do you have a boyfriend?
01:17:11 Look, James, please, you have to call Jamie, OK?
01:17:15 Just call him.
01:17:16 You can use my phone.
01:17:31 Why won't he come home?
01:17:34 Wouldn't you wanna go home?
01:18:17 What are you doing?
01:18:22 I don't understand?
01:18:26 What are you doing here?
01:18:30 Explain it to me, please.
01:18:34 First you bring Ceth into the relationship--
01:18:37 What's wrong with you?
01:18:39 I didn't want Jamie to be alone.
01:18:43 How long have you been planning this?
01:18:47 What, so you've been making a suicide tape for the last six months?
01:18:52 I just wanted him to know it wasn't his fault.
01:18:57 Jamie loves you.
01:19:01 You have so much.
01:19:06 I know.
01:19:09 I see it all around me.
01:19:14 But it stops at my skin.
01:19:19 I can't let it inside.
01:19:23 It's always been like that.
01:19:26 It's always gonna be like that.
01:19:31 I can feel it in little moments with Jamie,
01:19:34 because he loves me so hard.
01:19:39 He loves me as hard as the people who treated me like shit.
01:19:48 I can't feel it.
01:19:51 Don't.
01:19:55 Don't. Don't. No.
01:19:57 No. No.
01:20:02 Go! Go!
01:20:06 Don't you see that I don't wanna be this!
01:20:09 ... if that makes people uncomfortable, then it makes us uncomfortable.
01:20:13 But at least it's truthful.
01:20:16 I don't want to lie any more.
01:20:17 Because that isn't who I am, and it isn't who I'm trying to, who we're trying to be.
01:21:48 I have to get some sort of information,
01:21:50 because the patient that was there checked himself out.
01:21:54 Ceth!
01:23:10 Are you sure?
01:24:05 Be glad you followed me out into the fucking cold
01:24:09 so you could feel something?
01:24:12 It's hard not to feel anything in your life.
01:24:15 Do you feel it now, you little faggot?
01:24:53 Don't you fucking look at me.
01:24:56 Don't fucking look at me!
01:25:05 It's OK.
01:26:50 "... is doing everything possible to get some power back,
01:26:53 "and he's advising calm, which seems unnecessary,
01:26:57 "because there's been no reported incidents of looting or violence of any kind.
01:27:01 "So far, no explanation for what caused the...
01:27:04 I'm out to get some fruit and some batteries.
01:27:07 "... no reason to believe that this is the result of terrorist acts..."