The Comebacks

en
00:00:29 Nothing is more inspiring
00:00:31 Than the tale of a sports hero.
00:00:34 But this story is
00:00:38 The LOSER.
00:00:40 And as you'll see,
00:00:43 His name?
00:00:45 Lambeau Fields.
00:00:47 To me, he's a hero,
00:00:48 An inspiration and a friend.
00:00:50 To the rest of the world,
00:00:52 He's the worst coach
00:00:55 Hey, Bill!
00:00:56 Buckner!
00:00:58 What?
00:00:59 What's a six-Letter word
00:01:00 For a tropical fruit?
00:01:02 Not now.
00:01:03 I'm thinking
00:01:05 Zip it. Be quiet.
00:01:07 Could be "papaya"!
00:01:08 Fields, this is the World Series, man-
00:01:10 Slow roller down to first.
00:01:13 It gets through Buckner's legs!
00:01:15 The Mets win!
00:01:16 It's "Papaya. "
00:01:22 Let's go!
00:01:29 Whoa!
00:01:33 That's on me.
00:01:35 Marco, come here.
00:01:37 Go tell Zidane, tell him I said...
00:01:43 Go tell him I said that.
00:01:46 Ta mere est une
00:01:52 I don't remember
00:01:56 Being labeled the biggest
00:01:59 Finally got
00:02:02 And he hit rock bottom.
00:02:04 Coach?
00:02:06 Freddie.
00:02:08 My God,
00:02:09 I hardly recognized you.
00:02:11 I bought a new hat.
00:02:13 Nice.
00:02:15 It's good to see you, buddy.
00:02:17 I got a proposition for you.
00:02:18 All right.
00:02:20 I'm late for work.
00:02:21 Yeah.
00:02:23 Hey, Manuel, Javier,
00:02:25 Hola, Coach.
00:02:28 They ride the horses.
00:02:29 Coach wasn't exactly coaching anymore.
00:02:33 His job was to help facilitate
00:02:35 The continuation of the noble
00:02:37 It was about helping out
00:02:40 To draw forth
00:02:42 Of the champion D.N.A. Which-
00:02:44 Aw, hell.
00:02:46 So, tell me about
00:02:49 There's this small college
00:02:51 Heartland State University.
00:02:53 It's got a beautiful campus
00:02:57 They need
00:02:59 Me go back to coaching?
00:03:03 Oh. Sorry.
00:03:04 Okay.
00:03:08 Listen, Coach...
00:03:10 You and me we've been
00:03:13 And no matter what anybody says,
00:03:15 I mean, you're one
00:03:17 It's time for you
00:03:19 I appreciate it,
00:03:21 But I'm happy here.
00:03:22 For once in my life,
00:03:27 I said no!
00:03:30 You know what no means.
00:03:32 Aah! You just finish yourself.
00:03:35 Aah!
00:03:36 Thanks anyway, buddy.
00:03:38 Good to see ya.
00:03:41 Uh, I shouldn't, 'cause,
00:03:43 I got a terrible cold.
00:03:47 Coming up on Fox Sports News,
00:03:50 The mighty Venus Williams
00:04:01 Here, Maria!
00:04:03 Smile! - Right here!
00:04:06 WOMAN
00:04:07 There you are.
00:04:11 Is something wrong?
00:04:14 Freddie Wiseman
00:04:17 Told me about a coaching job.
00:04:19 College football.
00:04:21 But I said no.
00:04:23 I told him I'm out.
00:04:25 Sweetie...
00:04:28 Are you sure?
00:04:29 I mean, coaching
00:04:31 Like-Like hepatitis C or...
00:04:36 I don't know, Barb.
00:04:38 It would mean moving again.
00:04:40 You know, this house
00:04:43 Look at this den.
00:04:44 It's already filled
00:04:46 With sports memorabilia
00:04:48 You know,
00:04:49 For you to get
00:04:51 That'd be something, wouldn't it?
00:04:54 Oh, come on.
00:04:56 Coaching is
00:04:59 Like cockfighting
00:05:02 That's true.
00:05:05 Maybe I will
00:05:10 Yeah! You can't keep a legend
00:05:12 In the shadows for long.
00:05:14 Set!
00:05:16 Hut!
00:05:17 Honey...
00:05:21 Honey, honey,
00:05:23 Honey, um...
00:05:25 Just promise me that you
00:05:28 That you completely forget
00:05:30 What?!
00:05:32 Family comes first.
00:05:34 You know that.
00:05:35 Really?
00:05:37 Gymnastics meets
00:05:40 Michelle?
00:05:41 Your daughter.
00:05:42 Oh, of course, Michelle.
00:05:46 What the hell was that?
00:05:47 Your son.
00:05:48 Scruffy!
00:05:49 Jeffrey!
00:05:50 Well, someone's name is Scruffy.
00:05:52 Scruffy was your dog
00:05:54 See, honey, this is exactly
00:06:02 Hello.
00:06:03 Sorry, wrong number.
00:06:07 That was the police.
00:06:09 They're looking for the parents
00:06:11 What?
00:06:13 Don't worry, sweetie.
00:06:17 We're gonna get through this.
00:06:19 Honey, that's not Michelle.
00:06:26 Michelle Fields,
00:06:28 You have been charged
00:06:30 Robbery, arson,
00:06:35 And being
00:06:38 That got a lot
00:06:41 Therefore,
00:06:42 I hereby sentence you to rejoin
00:06:45 The USA Gymnastics Team.
00:06:47 No!
00:06:49 Why would you do this to me?
00:06:52 Hey, Tommy B.
00:06:54 Listen, I wanna put 50 grand
00:06:56 To win the gold in Beijing.
00:06:58 Thanks, buddy.
00:07:05 Oh, shit.
00:07:07 I have my reasons.
00:07:10 This is all your fault!
00:07:12 Oh, sweet Jesus.
00:07:16 How could this happen?
00:07:19 It's okay, Coach,
00:07:22 We'll get through this.
00:07:23 We're getting a ticket!
00:07:25 I knew that was
00:07:27 So Coach took the job
00:07:29 At Heartland State and made
00:07:32 That he wouldn't forget 'em.
00:07:33 - Wait! Wait a second!
00:07:35 - Dad!
00:07:38 #You take one down
00:07:40 They settled in Plainfolk, Texas.
00:07:43 A sleepy little town,
00:07:45 So cozy that it didn't even
00:07:51 #No more bottles
00:07:54 Coach Fields was
00:07:57 But this time, he really had
00:08:00 Welcome to your
00:08:03 Hope you're ready for the worst
00:08:09 I'm gonna do things
00:08:10 That are cruel,
00:08:14 I'm gonna ride your ass
00:08:17 Day and night.
00:08:20 I'm gonna make you bleed
00:08:22 From places that you've
00:08:25 It's gonna hurt bad.
00:08:29 It's gonna hurt deep.
00:08:33 Then it's gonna start
00:08:36 Then it's gonna hurt again.
00:08:42 Now, I need to get this team
00:08:45 Which means some of you ladies
00:08:47 Starting with you, you
00:08:50 - And you.
00:08:51 Get a chance to play yet.
00:08:53 If there's one thing
00:08:55 Coach, we're the only players
00:08:57 Wait, man, how do you
00:08:59 - Huh?
00:09:02 Maybe next year, guys.
00:09:03 Thanks for coming out.
00:09:05 All right, let's see if I've got
00:09:07 Anybody else out here
00:09:10 Randy Randinger!
00:09:11 - Here, Coach.
00:09:13 Right here, sir.
00:09:15 I'm ready to give it my all.
00:09:17 I'll do whatever it
00:09:19 Refill the waters,
00:09:21 Buff everyone's helmet.
00:09:24 Oh...
00:09:26 That helmet.
00:09:27 I thought you were talking
00:09:29 Good. We got a towel boy.
00:09:31 Next-
00:09:32 Buddy Boy Jones!
00:09:34 All right! I got me
00:09:36 A big, mean son of a bitch!
00:09:38 I wouldn't
00:09:42 Football is war, son.
00:09:43 You got to be a killer.
00:09:47 Ow!
00:09:49 I'm telling on you!
00:09:53 Next, ACL Tear!
00:09:57 It's pronounced "Aseel," sir.
00:10:00 Aseel Tare.
00:10:01 ACL Tear. Got it.
00:10:03 It says here you rushed for
00:10:07 Keep it up,
00:10:09 Hope so, Coach.
00:10:10 Nothing can hold you back.
00:10:12 Except an unforeseen
00:10:15 What are the odds
00:10:18 It's Aseel, sir. Aseel Tare.
00:10:22 Got it. ACL Tear.
00:10:25 Right there.
00:10:27 Is that a radio I hear?
00:10:29 No, that's just I Pod.
00:10:37 Whoa!
00:10:40 God, what a retarded
00:10:43 Hey!
00:10:44 I don't ever want
00:10:47 You're talking about a person,
00:10:49 A human being!
00:10:51 Come here, son.
00:10:53 He may be a
00:10:56 A drooling mush head,
00:10:57 A short bus-Riding,
00:10:59 Spaz-Ass simpleton,
00:11:01 But he is not a retard.
00:11:04 If there's one thing
00:11:05 That's disrespect.
00:11:08 Okay, I Pod.
00:11:13 How'd you like
00:11:17 Yeah.
00:11:18 Let this be a lesson
00:11:20 You judge not,
00:11:23 It's time someone
00:11:26 To once and for all
00:11:28 Okay, that's enough.
00:11:31 Get him off me.
00:11:43 Here comes Trotter, here comes Trotter.
00:11:45 Here come who?
00:11:47 Trotter, Trotter, he's a star.
00:11:49 Touchdown, Trotter, touchdown.
00:11:51 What's this all about?
00:11:53 What's it to you, old man?
00:11:55 This "old man"
00:11:57 I want you suited up
00:11:58 In two minutes,
00:12:01 Looks like we
00:12:04 You know that, right?
00:12:07 Figurin' out what
00:12:09 Minute and 99 seconds.
00:12:20 Let's get something
00:12:22 I don't like the ego,
00:12:25 I don't like that...
00:12:27 Coming out of your limo.
00:12:28 Damn!
00:12:30 What are you doing in there?
00:12:31 Just, um, getting
00:12:34 With my new boyfriend
00:12:36 And... lover.
00:12:39 Oh, please,
00:12:41 This is just another one
00:12:43 Trying to make me mad.
00:12:44 It's not a stunt, Dad.
00:12:46 It's just me
00:12:49 Who happens to be black.
00:12:53 See you later.
00:12:58 Black boyfriend.
00:13:00 Damn!
00:13:03 All right!
00:13:04 Any walk-Ons?
00:13:08 Hey, Coach.
00:13:10 Name is Vince.
00:13:13 I'm just a bartender from Philly
00:13:14 Whose only dream
00:13:16 It's all I got left
00:13:18 After I lost my job teaching
00:13:21 Like my alcoholic father
00:13:24 "A man can only take
00:13:27 I promise to give you
00:13:30 What do you say, Coach?
00:13:34 I say you can add
00:13:37 To your list of woes.
00:13:39 Now beat it, buzzkill.
00:13:46 Okay, ladies, show time!
00:13:48 Offense, hit the line!
00:13:50 Defense, give 'em hell!
00:13:52 Let's see what you boys got!
00:13:54 Not you.
00:13:58 FIELDS
00:14:03 Hike the damn ball!
00:14:08 I suppose we don't have a quarterback.
00:14:14 All right!
00:14:16 Still don't have a quarterback.
00:14:18 Any other positions
00:14:20 We need a kicker.
00:14:23 I'll steam up your wiener
00:14:24 And stick it
00:14:29 Oh.
00:14:31 That wiener.
00:14:33 Yeah, this is great.
00:14:36 Middle of Bumfuck, Nowhere.
00:14:38 How am I gonna find
00:14:41 If you build it, he will come.
00:14:47 If you build it, he will
00:14:51 Come...
00:14:53 Who will come?
00:14:54 Your father. Your dead father.
00:14:58 My father's not dead.
00:14:59 I just spoke with him
00:15:01 You got to be shittin' me.
00:15:03 Is this 314 Bentley Road?
00:15:05 No, this is 314 Bentley Drive.
00:15:07 Fucking MapQuest.
00:15:10 Anyway, I know a quarterback.
00:15:12 You'll find his ass
00:15:25 Lance Truman?
00:15:26 Yeah.
00:15:28 Name's Lambeau Fields.
00:15:29 New football coach
00:15:31 Word on the street
00:15:33 Is that you're
00:15:35 Yeah, my dad wants me
00:15:37 Sorry, Coach.
00:15:38 Let me talk to your father.
00:15:40 He needs to know that
00:15:43 All right, listen, could we
00:15:46 My dad's made up his mind-
00:15:48 Then prove it-
00:15:51 Are you serious?
00:15:52 Your best pitch.
00:15:53 You got some wood?
00:15:54 No. But I did on the way
00:15:57 Sometimes when I'm driving,
00:16:00 In my lap, and there's just
00:16:03 Against my knuckleballs
00:16:04 That really, you know...
00:16:06 Just makes old Charlie hustle.
00:16:09 Yeah, that kind of wood.
00:16:10 - Right.
00:16:12 That's it. Thought for a second
00:16:59 I put everything I had on that.
00:17:01 It's time we go talk
00:17:09 Got a good feeling
00:17:11 By the way, where's
00:17:14 Uh... County General. Why?
00:17:16 Oh, no reason.
00:17:18 I'm just gonna pop in there,
00:17:21 Got a little headache, I guess.
00:17:25 Oh!
00:17:28 Oh! Ee!
00:17:32 Well, I'm sorry you had to drive
00:17:34 All the way out here, Fields.
00:17:36 Over the phone I wasn't gonna
00:17:44 Have you always
00:17:46 Mr. Truman?
00:17:48 No. Went for 11 straight years
00:17:52 What happened?
00:17:53 Turned 12.
00:17:56 I really wish you'd
00:17:58 Your son had a great
00:18:01 Hell, he might have been great,
00:18:02 If he could learn how to keep
00:18:05 - That's not true, Dad.
00:18:07 Then what the hell is this?
00:18:14 That's the Droppie Award
00:18:16 And what
00:18:18 That's a picture of me
00:18:22 And what are you eating
00:18:24 A Butterfingers.
00:18:27 This conversation is over, Coach.
00:18:28 My boy's not playing for anyone,
00:18:30 'Cause I can't stand
00:18:32 Asking me why my boy can't
00:18:36 Dad!
00:18:38 I just want
00:18:40 So you can hold
00:18:42 Please, Dad?
00:18:45 All right.
00:18:48 But if you give
00:18:50 Any reason to laugh at me,
00:18:53 You work at a mill?
00:18:54 The Sugar Mill-
00:18:57 I do Cher four nights a week,
00:19:25 Isn't she the best kicker
00:19:31 Kicker? Oh, hey, look-
00:19:36 How you doing?
00:19:39 - I want you to be my kicker.
00:19:41 I would like that very much.
00:19:42 - So you'll join the squad?
00:19:44 My parents can never know.
00:19:46 They're very traditional,
00:19:48 Should be spent in service
00:19:51 Cleaning, and pleasuring
00:19:53 - Hello. Welcome to the team.
00:19:54 Oh, my God.
00:19:56 Hey, what's this thing?
00:19:59 Oh, that's for your nose.
00:20:00 You put it on your face.
00:20:02 It's a nose guard.
00:20:07 Well, I thought
00:20:10 One of these.
00:20:20 Hey.
00:20:21 I'm Lance. Lance Truman.
00:20:22 I'm your new quarterback.
00:20:24 Word of advice, quarterback.
00:20:26 You just give me the damn ball,
00:20:30 This my team.
00:20:31 This my turf.
00:20:32 And this...
00:20:35 This my...
00:20:37 My Little Pony collection.
00:20:38 Rainbow Dash, first edition.
00:20:41 Still in the box, bitch.
00:20:42 Huddle up! Listen up!
00:20:44 Sit down.
00:20:47 Been doing
00:20:50 Turns out...
00:20:52 Every single one of you made
00:20:54 Yeah!
00:20:56 And I got to say, gang...
00:21:00 I will not stand
00:21:04 Now, if we're gonna be winners,
00:21:06 I'm gonna need
00:21:10 So we're all gonna sign
00:21:15 Why don't you
00:21:18 I want to start seeing D's...
00:21:21 And F's.
00:21:24 I want you to cut class.
00:21:26 I want academic probation.
00:21:28 When I walk in that locker room,
00:21:33 I want phone calls
00:21:35 To bail you horn dogs
00:21:37 I want felonies,
00:21:39 Lawsuits,
00:21:41 Sexual harassment allegations.
00:21:44 I want you to start acting like
00:21:47 Hey! Hey!
00:21:49 Anybody got a problem, you
00:21:55 You know what I think
00:22:17 You got a lot of anger, son.
00:22:19 That's 'cause I'm from somewhere
00:22:22 The skreets.
00:22:23 Dude, you grew up
00:22:25 We lived in the same cul-De-Sac.
00:22:27 Which is a dead-End skreet,
00:22:29 And no hope of ever getting out.
00:22:31 Unless you turn around in
00:22:33 He didn't like that, so...
00:22:35 It became this whole thing.
00:22:37 You don't like my rules...
00:22:38 George Johnson, is it?
00:22:42 - Ooh.
00:22:46 It's pronounced Jorge Juanson,
00:22:48 And no, I don't
00:22:50 And I don't like you,
00:22:52 You want to take
00:22:55 Then do it.
00:22:56 Punch me.
00:22:59 Go on.
00:23:00 Unless you're afraid.
00:23:02 Ooh! Oh!
00:23:11 That it?
00:23:13 Had enough?
00:23:16 Here's your tooth, Coach.
00:23:18 Thanks.
00:23:25 Well... look who's here.
00:23:27 She looks skinny...
00:23:30 Fat.
00:23:31 Her leotard's cute...
00:23:32 Yuck.
00:23:33 Yeah. She's pretty...
00:23:35 Hot.
00:23:38 I mean...
00:23:39 I would like to smother her.
00:23:42 Yeah.
00:23:43 With my breasts.
00:24:25 She never could stick it.
00:24:27 God, she could stick me.
00:24:30 Hi.
00:24:31 I'm Lance.
00:24:33 So, um, what are you, like...
00:24:36 The laundry man?
00:24:37 No, I just joined
00:24:39 Me and a few guys from
00:24:41 A few hours a week,
00:24:43 That's kind of brutal.
00:24:44 Well... it's got its perks.
00:24:59 Anyway, um...
00:25:02 Would you like to
00:25:06 No.
00:25:07 Why not?
00:25:08 'Cause I'm not
00:25:10 Huh?
00:25:11 I already have one.
00:25:13 Oh.
00:25:20 What's up, baby?
00:25:21 Let's go get something to eat,
00:25:23 'Cause a brother's starvin'.
00:25:25 I already ate.
00:25:26 Don't call me baby.
00:25:28 Makes me feel like an object.
00:25:30 I'm sorry.
00:25:31 He was talking to me.
00:25:33 Come on, baby.
00:25:37 Boy got laundry to do.
00:25:45 Some guys have all the luck.
00:25:49 Oh, yeah.
00:25:52 Hey, gang.
00:25:54 Gather around-
00:25:58 This is my old bucket
00:26:00 From my own
00:26:03 I was a fullback.
00:26:05 Short-Yardage specialist
00:26:07 For the Loserville Golden Oafers.
00:26:09 They'd bring me in in
00:26:11 You know, the Hammerhead
00:26:13 Yo, how many
00:26:15 Nada, zilch.
00:26:17 Zero, not one.
00:26:19 Boy...
00:26:21 I'd give anything
00:26:24 Why didn't you score, Coach?
00:26:26 Quick answer: No talent.
00:26:28 In the big picture,
00:26:30 We didn't play as a team.
00:26:32 Now, there's one week
00:26:35 We've got to be one body,
00:26:39 Now, who do you play for?
00:26:41 The Comebacks!
00:26:42 Trotter.
00:26:43 Who?
00:26:45 The Comebacks!
00:26:46 Trotter!
00:26:49 Sorry, gang, but we are a team.
00:26:51 If I've got to bust his hump,
00:26:53 I've got to bust
00:26:55 - Come on, man!
00:26:57 Gonna make a difference-
00:26:58 It's hump-Busting time.
00:27:01 Right! Dig! That's it!
00:27:04 That's my team!
00:27:06 Ooh! Ow! Ah!
00:27:08 Randinger!
00:27:10 Stop goofing around!
00:27:13 Get up here!
00:27:26 Oh, my God.
00:27:30 Survive on the ice,
00:27:39 Yeah!
00:27:40 Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
00:27:44 Yeah!
00:27:45 If you can dodge a wrench,
00:27:49 You can dodge a tackler.
00:27:56 Same thing goes for a firearm.
00:28:05 Did I dodge it?
00:28:08 Walk it off.
00:28:13 All right, listen up.
00:28:17 No one's going home today
00:28:19 Until one of you
00:28:33 Okay, everybody hit the showers.
00:28:36 - Who do you play for?!
00:28:38 Trotter! Trotter!
00:28:42 All right, good!
00:28:44 You're finally a team!
00:28:49 Except for you, Randy-
00:28:51 Oh, come on Coach.
00:28:58 I work down at the car wash
00:29:00 I'll have your wheels sparkling
00:29:02 Car wash- Right.
00:29:04 Sometimes I think
00:29:09 First, highlights
00:29:12 Featuring a courageous
00:29:14 From the 93-Year-Old
00:29:39 Hey, fellas.
00:29:43 Name's Lambeau Fields.
00:29:44 Just thought I'd drop by
00:29:47 Oh, we know who you are.
00:29:49 We know all about
00:29:52 And your plans for our team.
00:29:58 We want you
00:30:00 Coach.
00:30:02 We think that's terrific! We do!
00:30:08 But if you think
00:30:10 Unconventional training methods
00:30:17 - We support that 100 percent.
00:30:19 We do.
00:30:24 But if you should play
00:30:27 And lose...
00:30:33 Aw, heck, there's always
00:30:35 - There's so many games in a season!
00:30:40 I can't tell you how relieved
00:30:43 Well, good. But if you should
00:30:45 We'll tie you to a tree
00:30:48 All over your ass and let
00:30:58 Good luck on your
00:31:00 - Like some coffee?
00:31:02 - Oh, drink up now.
00:31:04 - Oh, we brew it fresh here.
00:31:07 Oh, go ahead and
00:31:09 Yeah.
00:31:09 - It's real good.
00:31:12 Well, I'm just-
00:31:15 - Heh, Hey, shooter!
00:31:18 You can have the whole thing-
00:31:20 Put the weapon down.
00:31:22 And Coach heard
00:31:26 You see this was a town
00:31:29 A brisk Saturday in autumn
00:31:32 Was like a holiday
00:31:33 The whole town
00:31:36 Everyone in Heartland,
00:31:39 Was at the game.
00:31:40 MAN
00:31:42 Your Heartland State
00:31:53 Hi, honey!
00:31:55 Good luck!
00:31:56 What's going on?
00:31:58 They're all two towns over
00:31:59 At the University of Texas game.
00:32:00 Hey, the Longhorns
00:32:03 And here comes the visiting team,
00:32:06 The Boner State Trojans!
00:32:17 These Trojans are tough.
00:32:19 They're rock-Hard on offense!
00:32:21 They've got a stiff defense!
00:32:24 They'll exploit
00:32:26 And if they get in a groove,
00:32:31 Any which way they want.
00:32:34 You can't lay down or they
00:32:38 - Season ticket holders coming through!
00:32:41 12 years running!
00:32:42 That's right!
00:32:44 47-Yard line, bitch!
00:33:02 All right, we can do it.
00:33:05 ANNOUNCER
00:33:09 Football season is...
00:33:12 ...as bad as it was last year.
00:33:24 Team, hut!
00:33:39 This is so humiliating.
00:33:44 Comebacks rule!
00:33:49 End of the first,
00:33:54 Here comes Trotter.
00:33:56 Here comes Trotter.
00:34:00 You missed the whole first quarter.
00:34:02 Get off my back, Coach.
00:34:06 Me.
00:34:07 And remember, Dad, he's black.
00:34:11 Black as a Mississippi
00:34:16 All right, Trotter.
00:34:17 You're on the bench
00:34:19 If you're ever late again,
00:34:22 Whatever, Coach.
00:34:24 I think you're forgetting
00:34:26 The future of this team.
00:34:28 And his name is ACL Tear.
00:34:31 Coach, you know,
00:34:34 You might start to jinx me
00:34:37 Uh, that name.
00:34:38 Nonsense.
00:34:40 Now, get out there,
00:34:42 Tear it up good.
00:34:43 All right, Coach.
00:34:45 Go get 'em, Tear.
00:34:45 Let's go, Comebacks-
00:34:47 Execution, execution.
00:34:51 Green 80!
00:34:54 Green 80! Set. Hut.
00:34:57 Go.
00:35:00 Go!
00:35:03 Ooh!
00:35:25 Nothing can stop him!
00:35:46 'At a way, ACL Tear-
00:35:48 - Way to take a hit from a bus, dude.
00:36:13 Final score: Trojans 83,
00:36:16 Comebacks 0.
00:36:24 Hold this.
00:36:26 What did I tell you about
00:36:29 Dad, I only fumbled
00:36:31 A couple!
00:36:32 Why don't you tell
00:36:34 How many times
00:36:35 Two.
00:36:36 Two! Two times!
00:36:38 Is that what you call "a couple"?
00:36:40 Actually, Dad, two is a couple.
00:36:42 This conversation is over!
00:36:45 Come on. Loser!
00:36:48 You can kiss my ass.
00:36:58 Coach?
00:37:03 You have been sitting
00:37:06 I've just got a few more
00:37:10 Can't you watch them tomorrow?
00:37:13 Not if I want my
00:37:15 To play the
00:37:19 It's starting again, Coach.
00:37:22 Hmm?
00:37:23 You're ignoring me, this family.
00:37:26 I am not.
00:37:27 Oh, please!
00:37:28 You have sat in here night after night,
00:37:31 And everything
00:37:33 Ignoring us is-Is something
00:37:37 Like a make-Your-Own-Taco bar
00:37:41 Jesus, Barb.
00:37:42 This is my last shot.
00:37:44 These films matter.
00:37:46 I need them to become
00:37:49 I just don't see how watching
00:37:51 Man-On-Man porn
00:37:54 Why must everyone
00:37:57 Why does it have to be so hard core?
00:38:00 Once again, my method!
00:38:03 Can you knock it off, I Pod?
00:38:05 It's a DVD, for God's sakes.
00:38:27 It's open.
00:38:34 Hey, um...
00:38:35 Hi.
00:38:37 - I was just, um...
00:38:38 Practicing ballet will help
00:38:42 Exactly.
00:38:43 It's the footwork in the pocket.
00:38:46 Um...
00:38:48 Yeah, what's up?
00:38:50 I'm supposed to give you these.
00:38:51 Oh, okay.
00:38:54 The Gridiron Gangbang.
00:38:57 The Bad News Bare Asses.
00:38:59 The Longest Nards.
00:39:03 - His method.
00:39:05 What's that all about?
00:39:07 What? Oh, this?
00:39:10 My dad thought
00:39:11 Hold onto the ball
00:39:13 Does it hurt?
00:39:16 I'm kind of used to it.
00:39:19 So he's done this before?
00:39:22 Yeah.
00:39:29 Yeah.
00:39:33 There, that'll keep
00:39:38 Hey, look out for the tr-
00:39:42 Don't worry about it.
00:39:43 They're baby teeth.
00:39:46 Happy 12th birthday, Lance.
00:39:49 There you go. Drink up.
00:39:56 Let's get out of here.
00:40:17 The thing is, it's all my fault.
00:40:19 I got a great arm,
00:40:22 I always have.
00:40:24 I mean, I don't know how to fix it.
00:40:26 See?
00:40:29 You have no idea
00:40:30 To have a father whose
00:40:33 Oh, you think so?
00:40:38 Mom, go long. Go long.
00:40:43 - Close your eyes
00:40:46 Don't want you to see...
00:40:49 That's my girl,
00:40:52 Straight A's!
00:40:54 Let's just say it
00:41:01 Where are we going?
00:41:03 Illegal use
00:41:06 - Have we gone too far?
00:41:09 Have we gone too far?
00:41:13 Wow.
00:41:15 I had no idea.
00:41:16 Have we gone too far?
00:41:19 I thought that I had the
00:41:22 Me, too.
00:41:24 Just close your eyes
00:41:26 What a surprise
00:41:28 Till we get there
00:41:29 You won't know where
00:41:32 See you around
00:41:34 I hope I see you around
00:41:36 Just close your eyes
00:41:37 The way I always do
00:41:39 It's always a surprise
00:41:43 To be with you
00:41:44 You won't know where...
00:41:47 Wow.
00:41:49 They look just like footballs.
00:41:58 Oh.
00:42:06 Oh.
00:42:10 No, wait.
00:42:12 - I, I can't do this.
00:42:13 Yeah, it's okay,
00:42:15 - No, really, I...
00:42:16 It's all wrong.
00:42:17 I have a boyfriend.
00:42:18 - Yeah, I know.
00:42:20 No! I...
00:42:22 Um, Michelle, I... I need
00:42:25 Michelle.
00:42:37 Out of my way, fat ass.
00:42:39 You finally decide to block
00:42:42 I was just going to
00:42:44 To my birthday party.
00:42:46 FYI, there's going
00:42:50 Nice.
00:42:52 Score one for Trotter,
00:42:54 Which is one more
00:42:56 Ooh...
00:42:57 Look, man, why don't you just
00:42:59 Is a football...
00:43:01 PLAYERS
00:43:04 Why don't you act like a barbell
00:43:09 Why don't you pretend this
00:43:12 Full of groceries
00:43:16 Hey, hey!
00:43:17 Why don't you act like my parents,
00:43:19 Go upstairs
00:43:22 - Huh?
00:43:45 Hey!
00:43:48 Knock it off!
00:43:51 Yeah.
00:43:54 Now, you listen to me.
00:43:56 This is a team.
00:43:58 And the only way
00:44:00 Is when you start
00:44:03 And you can sure as hell bet
00:44:06 This locker room
00:44:08 What being a team is all about.
00:44:18 Coach is right.
00:44:20 We got to start believing
00:44:23 Like brothers.
00:44:25 That's the only way
00:44:27 Please.
00:44:29 You'll never be my brother.
00:44:33 Si, es la verdad.
00:44:36 We're all too different.
00:44:39 Nothing in this world could
00:44:55 #Just a small-Town girl #
00:44:58 #Living in a lonely world#
00:45:03 #She took a midnight
00:45:11 #Just a city boy#
00:45:15 #Born and raised
00:45:20 #He took the midnight train
00:45:27 #A singer in a smoky room#
00:45:31 #The smell of wine
00:45:35 #For a smile,
00:45:38 #It goes on and on
00:45:42 #Strangers waiting#
00:45:47 #Up and down the boulevard#
00:45:51 #Their shadows searching
00:45:58 #Streetlight people#
00:46:04 #Livin' just to find emotion#
00:46:07 #Hiding#
00:46:08 #Somewhere in the night#
00:46:23 #Strangers waiting#
00:46:27 #Up and down the boulevard#
00:46:30 #Their shadows searching#
00:46:34 #In the night#
00:46:39 #Don't stop believin' #
00:46:44 #Hold on to that feeling#
00:46:47 #Streetlight people #
00:46:55 #Don't stop believin' #
00:47:00 # Hold on #
00:47:03 #Streetlight... #
00:47:05 And the booster club
00:47:08 A smoke machine and laser lights
00:47:14 All right, gather 'round, take a knee.
00:47:17 Got a letter here from
00:47:21 The kid's sick, real sick.
00:47:25 Probably won't make it
00:47:30 Goddamn it.
00:47:32 Bobby has one last dying wish.
00:47:36 That's for the opposing team
00:47:40 Now, we gonna let Bobby
00:47:42 No!
00:47:43 - What do we want him to do?
00:47:45 - Can't hear you.
00:47:48 Get out there...
00:48:11 - Let's go, Comebacks.
00:48:13 - Who are they playing?
00:48:15 Do you remember them?
00:48:16 No, I don't, 'cause
00:48:17 Very forgettable.
00:48:18 Okay, listen up.
00:48:20 Since our team got integrated,
00:48:22 I know a lot of you white
00:48:24 About losing your positions
00:48:27 More athletic,
00:48:31 Well, you have nothing
00:48:33 'Cause when the Titans
00:48:34 There is no black and white...
00:48:38 - The colors of our uniform.
00:48:40 We family.
00:48:41 Starting lineup, Isaiah.
00:48:44 Come on.
00:48:46 - Williams.
00:48:48 - Washington.
00:48:50 Washington.
00:48:53 - Washington.
00:48:55 Damn. Washington.
00:48:57 Yeah.
00:48:58 - Jefferson.
00:49:00 Jefferson, tell your mom
00:49:02 I know it's her.
00:49:03 - Carter.
00:49:05 Check his eligibility.
00:49:07 - Boyer.
00:49:09 - LeTroy.
00:49:11 Where the hell you
00:49:13 You said Troy.
00:49:14 I said LeTroy.
00:49:16 Sit your marshmallow
00:49:19 White boy think he gonna
00:49:21 You gonna learn,
00:49:23 Crack is whack
00:49:25 Now let's pray.
00:49:27 Red and white.
00:49:29 That's right, that's right,
00:49:31 Red and white.
00:49:33 Here's the kickoff,
00:49:34 As the Comebacks
00:49:37 From last week's
00:49:43 The ball is loose...
00:49:47 Yes! Yes!
00:49:48 - That's the way!
00:49:51 That's the way right there.
00:49:52 Ready, break!
00:50:00 Hmm?
00:50:02 Mm-Hmm.
00:50:05 Hike!
00:50:06 Truman drops back.
00:50:08 Touchdown Comebacks.
00:50:12 Their first score of the season.
00:50:17 Hike!
00:50:22 Juanson picks up the loose ball.
00:50:26 - Touchdown!
00:50:29 That's how we do it.
00:50:31 All right!
00:50:32 Sorry. I hugged him
00:50:35 I like your badonkadonks,
00:50:42 Let's go!
00:50:44 Set. Hut!
00:50:46 Titans on the reverse.
00:50:50 Ooh, what a move!
00:50:52 He's to the 30, the 20, the 10!
00:50:55 Another Titans touchdown.
00:50:58 Are you kidding me?
00:51:05 Let's go get the quarterback!
00:51:16 Yeah, I get it.
00:51:20 Wha-What's this part?
00:51:22 Oh, that means
00:51:24 Time's ticking down,
00:51:26 It all rests in the hands
00:51:29 Blue 20.
00:51:30 Blue 20. Hut!
00:51:37 He drops back.
00:51:42 They're going long!
00:51:48 Juanson's wide open.
00:51:50 - He makes the catch.
00:51:52 Hot damn, he's on fire.
00:52:00 Touchdown! The Comebacks win!
00:52:02 The Comebacks win!
00:52:05 Whoo-Hah!
00:52:22 Oh, gee.
00:52:27 Whoo, you like that,
00:52:29 - Take it like a man.
00:52:32 Heck of a job
00:52:36 - Except for Randy.
00:52:39 You had no part in the victory.
00:52:41 Coach, can I play
00:52:46 I'll toss your salad.
00:52:48 Please tell me you're gonna start
00:52:51 I'll salute your flagpole.
00:52:52 Please tell me
00:52:54 I'll pack your fudge.
00:52:57 Please tell me you're
00:53:00 Oh, no. I really meant I was gonna
00:53:07 All right, listen.
00:53:08 I want you all
00:53:11 Tear it up.
00:53:14 Lather up your nethers,
00:53:19 Go out and get yourself
00:53:21 Whatever it is you kids
00:53:23 All right, get in here.
00:53:27 - One, two, three.
00:53:44 The strippers are here.
00:00:09 Bling-Bling, baby.
00:00:15 Yo, what took
00:00:17 Stuff isn't easy to find
00:00:22 What's up, 'Seel?
00:00:24 That's some good shit.
00:00:27 Yeah... Now I can eat
00:00:47 I'll be right back.
00:00:53 Hey, Blue Crush,
00:00:56 Catching some waves.
00:00:58 I'm a total hard-Core
00:01:01 At night?
00:01:03 I told you... I'm hard-Core.
00:01:10 What's that?
00:01:12 I'm writing
00:01:13 Because I'm worried about
00:01:16 Of Social Security.
00:01:17 During a party? Why?
00:01:20 Because everyone's
00:01:22 So I'm rebelling
00:01:24 By being conscientious
00:01:27 Duh.
00:01:29 Michelle, I can't stop
00:01:30 That night when we kissed,
00:01:34 Bobbled your boobies...
00:01:36 I don't want to talk about it.
00:01:38 Why not?
00:01:39 Why won't you give me a chance?
00:01:41 Because if we went out,
00:01:43 You'd pick me up, we'd
00:01:48 Have a little picnic,
00:01:51 We'd lay out on
00:01:56 And ball, ball,
00:02:00 We'd do it over and over
00:02:03 And I would ride you so hard
00:02:05 You wouldn't be able
00:02:07 We'd do it every day.
00:02:09 All the time.
00:02:11 Always trying new things
00:02:13 And different positions.
00:02:15 Then we'd get married,
00:02:17 Move into a nice house
00:02:19 Two vacations a year.
00:02:20 One on a beach, and one
00:02:24 With the occasional
00:02:27 Second home on a lake,
00:02:30 Never tiring of
00:02:33 Or lessening
00:02:38 Well, excuse me.
00:02:40 But that is not the type
00:02:44 That sounded pretty good to me.
00:02:47 Especially the balling part.
00:02:48 Hmm.
00:02:51 You know what, Michelle?
00:02:53 I bet, under that tough
00:02:56 Under all that self-Tanner
00:03:00 There's something
00:03:04 And pink.
00:03:06 Probably smells a little bit,
00:03:11 I am not going to let you
00:03:17 Fine.
00:03:34 I hope you are kidding me.
00:03:36 A study group.
00:03:38 Please tell me
00:03:39 This is some kind of a joke.
00:03:41 Calculus.
00:03:42 Shakespeare?
00:03:45 You all signed a contract.
00:03:49 Ruin your season
00:03:52 No, Coach. We're simply
00:03:56 Oh, is that what you call it?
00:03:58 Mm-Hmm. You make me sick,
00:04:03 Now, I was hoping...
00:04:06 That you kids would
00:04:09 To do this on your own.
00:04:13 But, apparently,
00:04:14 I'm gonna have to
00:04:18 You won a football game!
00:04:21 Everybody knows that after
00:04:25 You're supposed to consume
00:04:32 Ah!
00:04:34 You should be
00:04:40 Oh, yeah,
00:04:45 What's the color?
00:04:48 Good times.
00:04:51 Yeah.
00:04:53 Look at me now, man.
00:04:54 Yeah, I brought all these
00:04:58 In my fake Louis Vuitton bag
00:05:03 Of pirated DVDs
00:05:06 Who cares, man?
00:05:08 I'm just having some fun,
00:05:13 Yeah! I'm a huge
00:05:17 Check me out.
00:05:21 Gotta have some more of that.
00:05:27 That's the right spot.
00:05:30 Now I'm crazy wasted
00:05:33 And I'm taking off
00:05:36 Yeah, it's cool, man.
00:05:38 I'm a football player.
00:05:40 That's what we do!
00:05:42 It's the cops!
00:05:44 You'll never take me alive.
00:05:53 Freeze, tighty-Whities!
00:05:55 Ah! Right in my Reggie Bush!
00:06:05 Oh, come on.
00:06:10 You can do it! Come on!
00:06:13 Get it!
00:06:15 Aw! I'm sorry, Clint.
00:06:18 I couldn't get it
00:06:20 Well, thanks for trying.
00:06:22 I should just ask for another one,
00:06:24 - But that piece goes so well with the room.
00:06:28 It does coordinate nicely
00:06:33 - Wanna have sex again?
00:06:46 - Who are you?
00:06:48 You can go free
00:06:49 If you beat me in hoops...
00:06:52 - One on one.
00:06:55 Me likey.
00:06:57 I feel I should warn you.
00:06:59 I was the leading scorer
00:07:02 Bitty-Boy's Basketball League
00:07:09 Well, I think I'm gonna
00:07:11 And just wait to be bailed out.
00:07:21 Psst!
00:07:22 Are you sure you
00:07:27 And so, Coach called the only man
00:07:29 He knew he could
00:07:31 The man who had been by his
00:07:34 The only man he knew
00:07:36 His partner, his rock, the wind
00:07:41 Thanks for coming, Freddie.
00:07:43 How long before
00:07:45 I'm not going to be
00:07:47 What? Why?
00:07:49 It was right about then
00:07:52 Realized something was afoot.
00:07:53 His old friend Freddie
00:07:56 And orchestrated a most
00:07:59 - That would allow Freddie...
00:08:01 Ooh, my bad.
00:08:04 But now you know, Coach.
00:08:05 The reason why I wanted you to
00:08:08 Is because I'm head coach
00:08:10 Of the Lone Star State Unbeatables.
00:08:13 Coach of the number one
00:08:16 Yeah. Yeah.
00:08:17 And I want it to stay that way.
00:08:19 See, I knew the Comebacks
00:08:22 And I also knew, if I could
00:08:25 They'd sink like a stone,
00:08:26 Because that's what you do, Coach-
00:08:29 You bastard.
00:08:32 How could you?
00:08:36 Freddie decided
00:08:40 As for Coach, he had
00:08:43 Why, just this morning,
00:08:47 He banged the wife
00:08:50 Come on, Turbo.
00:08:52 I'm in here with you.
00:09:00 Send a message to the warden.
00:09:02 I'll take him up
00:09:04 Your interpersonal skills are horrible.
00:09:07 And you're a terrible gossip.
00:09:10 People talk about you.
00:09:12 Oh, why resist it? Aah.
00:09:16 Oop da. Yeah, easy.
00:09:41 Make it, take it, be-Yotch.
00:09:50 Yeah! Come on!
00:09:56 I hope you weren't
00:10:07 Get that shit outta here.
00:10:08 It's called skills, junior.
00:10:11 And I guess I got some. Whoa.
00:10:33 Change of rules.
00:10:34 Even if you win,
00:10:41 What you looking at?
00:10:43 Fine.
00:10:46 I'll get it.
00:10:56 I got it.
00:10:58 Hurry up!
00:11:09 Shit.
00:11:18 All right, gang, today we play
00:11:21 They're one of the best teams
00:11:23 I'm not going to lie to you.
00:11:26 There's a lot of drama
00:11:28 Just found out that
00:11:31 He's drinking again.
00:11:32 And Lyla is cheating on Jason
00:11:34 With Tim, if you can believe that.
00:11:36 Smash can't
00:11:38 And I just found out
00:11:40 That last night,
00:11:41 Billy and Tyra
00:11:42 Had a pre-Homecoming party
00:11:44 And it got broken
00:11:46 Which means, for us...
00:11:49 Automatic victory-
00:11:54 Rock n' roll!
00:12:10 Blue, 22! Hike!
00:13:32 - Hey.
00:13:34 - How's it going, Coach?
00:13:36 Thanks
00:14:07 Oh, for the love of the game.
00:14:30 We all remember that touching story
00:14:32 Of the autistic
00:14:33 Who was finally
00:14:35 This amazing story
00:14:38 From all different
00:14:39 Last night,
00:14:41 Dr. Edmund Grand allowed Billy,
00:14:44 A chance at his dream.
00:14:47 Touching story
00:14:49 Time of death- 8:05.
00:14:53 There you are.
00:14:55 Well...
00:15:00 Tonight should be the greatest
00:15:05 But those kids,
00:15:09 Who's that?
00:15:11 Who's who?
00:15:13 That guy in the
00:15:15 Right there.
00:15:17 Oh... um...
00:15:20 I didn't think
00:15:21 We-We took in a foreign
00:15:23 He's a foreign
00:15:25 Uh-Huh.
00:15:26 Where you from?
00:15:29 I'm from, uh...
00:15:31 Banging-Your-Wife-Istan.
00:15:34 Where is that?
00:15:35 It's, uh...
00:15:37 It's a little south of, uh,
00:15:42 All right, Coach, all right.
00:15:44 I... I just couldn't
00:15:48 You were never here,
00:15:50 - In her sexual prime.
00:15:52 Don't try to stop me, Coach.
00:15:54 I have finally found a man
00:16:00 There isn't a Doing-Barb's-
00:16:02 Fine-Ass-Yvania, is there?
00:16:04 Is there?
00:16:11 Big story developing
00:16:13 Heartland State head coach
00:16:15 Is taking an unusual stance
00:16:18 He has locked his team
00:16:20 And now the squad is in danger
00:16:23 Conference championship
00:16:36 You sure got to have some
00:16:40 Go ahead. Do your worst.
00:16:44 My wife left me.
00:16:46 Aw, hell.
00:16:50 It's my fault.
00:16:54 Boys, if you find
00:16:58 That has all
00:17:01 And, yet, she's willing
00:17:03 Into bigger things.
00:17:05 And she doesn't mind
00:17:07 At a New Year's Eve party,
00:17:10 That's a gal.
00:17:11 - Yeah.
00:17:13 Well, don't take it so hard,
00:17:17 We've all walking in
00:17:19 Getting barn-Doored
00:17:22 - Yeah.
00:17:24 Ow.
00:17:25 Hell, I remember
00:17:28 And I did everything
00:17:30 And when I did, I made sure
00:17:34 How'd you do that?
00:17:36 I treated her like a queen-
00:17:40 Like an Egyptian queen.
00:17:43 Mummified and entombed her
00:17:46 Her shrieks of help
00:17:49 It's all about communication, fellas.
00:17:52 My Jeanie, she used to wag
00:17:55 And bug the bejesus
00:17:57 But, well, we sat down
00:18:01 In a mature manner and-And-
00:18:03 And now sh-She'll never,
00:18:07 Never wave this finger
00:18:10 Amen to that.
00:18:12 I'm gonna tell you something.
00:18:14 Now take Salamander here.
00:18:17 Now we get up in each other's
00:18:19 But then we make up and talk
00:18:25 You know what I'm saying, Coach?
00:18:26 Solid advice, fellas.
00:18:28 You're good people.
00:18:30 It's still locked.
00:18:37 What's up, guys?
00:18:39 It's time to do something
00:18:42 Get in the back.
00:18:44 Let's go.
00:18:46 Let's do it!
00:18:49 I think we're gonna need
00:19:07 I can't believe you, Dad.
00:19:09 Haven't you put
00:19:12 They did it to themselves, Michelle.
00:19:15 I finally found someone
00:19:17 And you're taking
00:19:19 Sweetie, Trotter
00:19:23 I don't like Trotter anymore.
00:19:26 There's somebody else.
00:19:29 Someone kind and sensitive.
00:19:32 Someone who
00:19:33 Loves to laugh and...
00:19:35 Makes me feel wanted and alive.
00:19:39 Michelle, I'm your daddy.
00:19:42 I'm talking about Lance.
00:19:46 Oh... Oh, good.
00:19:48 He's a good boy.
00:19:51 This could be the real thing.
00:19:54 I want what you and Mom have.
00:19:57 Herpes.
00:19:59 No!
00:20:01 True love.
00:20:03 Oh...
00:20:12 Well, if you find it,
00:20:14 Look at me. I blew it.
00:20:17 I promised your mother
00:20:20 Get in the way of our family,
00:20:29 It's not too late, Dad.
00:20:31 You can change all of this.
00:20:34 All you have to do
00:20:39 Can't I lose by just a little?
00:20:41 No, Dad. You have to win.
00:20:45 You've spent your
00:20:49 And this is your last,
00:20:52 To prove everyone wrong.
00:20:55 I know you're scared.
00:20:58 But you have to remember,
00:21:01 There used to be a...
00:21:03 A big, big man inside of you.
00:21:06 There's a reason for that.
00:21:08 I was in prison,
00:21:10 No, uh...
00:21:11 What I'm trying to say is that...
00:21:17 I believe in you, Dad.
00:21:18 Oh...
00:21:21 And Mom does, too.
00:21:23 Sweetie...
00:21:25 Thank you.
00:21:29 Well...
00:21:35 Then I better take care of business.
00:21:38 And when I'm done, we're gonna
00:22:16 What the hell
00:22:18 Hey, Coach.
00:22:21 Buddy Boy smashed a whole
00:22:24 I Pod's doing body shots
00:22:29 And Jorge, he's been
00:22:30 For the past six hours.
00:22:33 And Jasminder,
00:22:38 And I think that Randy
00:22:39 To Gwen Stefani over there.
00:22:42 And our signed contracts.
00:22:48 I have never been so proud
00:22:52 Yes!
00:22:53 Who do you play for?
00:22:55 Comebacks!
00:22:58 Hello, everyone.
00:22:59 Al Michaels, along with
00:23:01 To Odessa, Texas, home of
00:23:04 And-And this is
00:23:06 I mean, right in the middle
00:23:09 I mean, there's no place
00:23:30 What's this, Freddie?
00:23:32 Your players look like a bunch
00:23:36 That's because they are.
00:23:38 They're my gridiron gang.
00:23:40 So, you want to forfeit,
00:23:44 Save yourself a lot of
00:23:48 Why would I start now?
00:23:52 Lance!
00:23:56 Michelle.
00:23:58 I left something
00:24:00 For good luck.
00:24:02 I know.
00:24:03 I'm wearing it.
00:24:05 What?
00:24:06 The lace bra and the...
00:24:08 Crotch-Less panties.
00:24:11 No. I left you a note.
00:24:13 Oh.
00:24:15 A note saying that I'm sorry
00:24:17 For the way that I treated you.
00:24:19 That I was afraid
00:24:22 That I'm not afraid anymore.
00:24:25 That I am dying to let
00:24:28 Nope, I never got that.
00:24:30 Oh. Okay, well, check.
00:24:32 Maybe it fell into the back
00:24:35 Yeah, I'll... okay.
00:24:37 Lance.
00:24:39 Wait.
00:24:41 There's something else
00:24:46 This.
00:25:00 Well, isn't that sweet?
00:25:01 Trotter...
00:25:03 We'll settle this on the field.
00:25:05 Woo! Michelle!
00:25:08 Got your letter, baby.
00:25:09 You and me after
00:25:13 Woo! Yeah.
00:25:17 John, the excitement is so thick
00:25:19 In this stadium,
00:25:21 A- A-And there's two things
00:25:22 That I love to cut with a knife.
00:25:23 One of'em is turkey,
00:25:26 And if you're a Comebacks fan,
00:25:27 You got to hope
00:25:29 But you have to believe
00:25:30 The Unbeatables will be
00:25:32 Take a look down there-
00:25:39 Believers coming through!
00:25:40 - That's right! Get up!
00:25:43 - That's right. What's up?
00:25:45 What's up, eighth row?
00:25:46 Uh-Uh!
00:25:47 And the team captains
00:25:49 Take the field, ready
00:25:53 Call it in the air.
00:25:54 And when I say "it,"
00:25:57 Where is it?
00:26:01 Now where is it?
00:26:03 It's right here in your ear.
00:26:07 Call it in the air.
00:26:10 We'll receive.
00:26:44 Yeah, baby! Yeah!
00:26:48 Okay, ready... hut!
00:26:50 Unbeatables back to pass.
00:26:52 He's wide open.!
00:26:54 The bomb.!
00:26:56 He could go
00:26:57 All the way...
00:27:00 To Mexico.!
00:27:16 Green-20!
00:27:18 Green-20!
00:27:20 Hut!
00:27:22 Nah, you take that!
00:27:25 You take that!
00:27:28 Ooh!
00:27:29 Like you took my girl!
00:27:30 Personal foul.
00:27:41 Look, it's nothing personal, Trotter.
00:27:45 I'm in love with her, man.
00:27:46 Man, only thing you love
00:27:49 Man, would you guys shut up?
00:27:51 This game's bigger
00:27:53 Football taught me
00:27:55 With anger, with life.
00:27:57 This team's all I got.
00:27:59 Without it, I have nothing.
00:28:01 Back on the skreets.
00:28:02 Dude,
00:28:03 Your parents
00:28:05 A condo.
00:28:07 Where am I supposed
00:28:09 All right, all right.
00:28:10 Pro-Right-94, on one.
00:28:13 Break!
00:28:16 Hut!
00:28:19 How about a flag, ref?
00:28:20 My guy's getting mugged out there.
00:28:21 Don't take
00:28:25 That's ridiculous.
00:28:28 A 1,000 dollars a call.
00:28:31 Where is it now?
00:28:33 Hut!
00:28:45 Come on, ref!
00:28:47 You gotta call that!
00:28:50 What are you guys, blind?
00:28:56 Unbeatables up the middle
00:28:58 For an easy touchdown.!
00:29:01 They're running
00:29:03 Who are more than overmatched.
00:29:06 Jim Rome here, and this is a ridiculous
00:29:09 Half-Time score:35 to nothing.!
00:29:12 BOTH
00:29:18 We believe.
00:29:19 So, you ready to give up?
00:29:23 Almost.
00:29:24 Hey, hey, my favorite part of the game-
00:29:27 The half-Time show.!
00:29:29 Janet Jackson and Justin
00:29:31 So instead, we present you
00:29:33 To American values.
00:29:35 #The weekend's here #
00:29:37 # The weather's nice,
00:29:40 # I put your
00:29:42 #But the couch
00:29:46 # The game is
00:29:48 #Got deep-Fried snacks
00:29:50 # Rootin' for
00:29:52 #Oops, wardrobe
00:30:06 I mean, I mean,
00:30:07 It started out where she
00:30:09 A lot of clothes,
00:30:10 A lot of clothes,
00:30:13 Take a knee.
00:30:14 Listen up.
00:30:18 I've been a loser all my life.
00:30:20 I came into this world ass-First.
00:30:23 I was raised as a girl till
00:30:28 I didn't lose my virginity
00:30:32 That was by accident.
00:30:34 I didn't know
00:30:36 I was gonna have to pay for it-
00:30:40 I've destroyed everything
00:30:42 Chased away everyone
00:30:46 I am...
00:30:48 ...a failure as a husband
00:30:51 And a father and a coach.
00:30:54 And a human being.
00:31:08 Um... Coach?
00:31:10 Isn't this the part
00:31:12 Where you turn
00:31:14 And shortcomings
00:31:16 Into a rousing,
00:31:19 Huh?
00:31:23 Oh. That's a great idea.
00:31:25 You're a real asset
00:31:28 Well, thanks, Coach.
00:31:29 Does that mean I can play
00:31:32 No, absolutely not.
00:31:34 All right.
00:31:37 All right.
00:31:41 I don't think
00:31:45 The scope
00:31:50 Aim high.
00:31:54 And I...
00:31:56 Pledge... to all of you.
00:31:59 That you will be
00:32:00 Showered...
00:32:02 By the cheers
00:32:04 And shouts of joy...
00:32:07 From your fans.
00:32:10 It depends...
00:32:13 ...on you now.
00:32:15 Remember...
00:32:17 Your preparation
00:32:18 H...
00:32:21 And you can all be...
00:32:23 Champs!
00:32:25 Yeah, champs!
00:32:27 All right, let's close our eyes
00:32:34 Okay, you can open
00:32:36 All right, let's go get 'em!
00:32:41 Second half just under way,
00:32:43 And despite the score,
00:32:45 Are even more fired up.!
00:32:47 And nobody wants this
00:32:49 More than Coach Fields.
00:32:51 That's the way!
00:32:52 Hope you had a good rest, Oprah.
00:32:54 Actually, Coach gave
00:32:58 Wait a minute, what'd you say?
00:33:00 Oprah. I'm saying you're
00:33:03 Are you
00:33:06 Oprah's an incisive
00:33:09 You miserable piece of shit!
00:33:15 The toss to Trotter...
00:33:21 Ooh.! And Truman lays
00:33:23 Go, go!
00:33:26 Yeah!
00:33:27 That's the way!
00:33:38 Truman scrambling.
00:33:40 Nowhere to go.!
00:33:42 Oh, look at that, Trotter
00:33:44 I mean, I mean,
00:33:45 Looks like he's
00:33:47 The Comebacks are finally
00:33:50 Yes! Yes! Yes.
00:33:54 Oh!
00:33:57 - Yeah!
00:34:00 Nice block.
00:34:01 Thanks.
00:34:04 Nice run.
00:34:05 Thanks.
00:34:09 Hey, Lance.
00:34:13 Be good to her, man.
00:34:19 Be good to her, too.
00:34:33 Not all about winning, is it?
00:34:42 Hey, cameraman!
00:34:46 I hope you're
00:34:48 John, it looks like Coach Fields
00:34:50 Is holding up the sign,
00:34:52 Oh, he loves me.
00:34:54 Like chili fries
00:34:57 BOTH He loves you, Barb.
00:35:00 He loves you, Barb.
00:35:03 He loves you, Barb.
00:35:06 He loves you, Barb.
00:35:09 Why can't I have that?
00:35:12 It's so beautiful.
00:35:14 Aww.
00:35:17 Hey, Coach!
00:35:18 Suppose I can get in the game?
00:35:22 Hey, guys, look who's back.
00:35:24 - I'm a quick healer.
00:35:26 The cavalry's arrived.
00:35:28 And he goes by the name of-
00:35:30 Aseel Tare.
00:35:33 Okay, I got it. ACL Tear,
00:35:38 Not you Randy. Not you.
00:35:42 Set!
00:35:43 Brown-88! Hike!
00:35:47 Aseel Tare with the carry.
00:35:53 Look at that.!
00:35:54 He's got the entire defense
00:36:03 The pile is clearing, John.
00:36:04 Yeah, yeah, it is. And take a look at that.
00:36:06 He got ripped into pieces.
00:36:07 Oh!
00:36:11 No worries!
00:36:15 Yeah!
00:36:17 John, what we're seeing here
00:36:18 Is a definite shift
00:36:19 I mean, we-we really are, Al.
00:36:21 I mean, y-You take a look
00:36:23 And they were down by a lot
00:36:25 And now they're not down
00:36:26 And-And pretty soon
00:36:29 Randy.
00:36:32 Randy.
00:36:33 Randy.
00:36:35 Randy! Randy!
00:36:37 Randy! Randy! Randy! Randy!
00:36:43 Randy! Randy! Randy!
00:36:50 They're calling your name, son.
00:36:52 Get out there!
00:36:53 Randy! Randy!
00:36:57 Go! Go, Randy!
00:36:59 Would you look at this.!
00:37:01 Randy Randinger is making
00:37:03 His first appearance ever
00:37:06 Randinger's wide open.!
00:37:17 He scores!
00:37:19 Unbelievable!
00:37:26 Blue-Ten!
00:37:28 Hut!
00:37:31 Ooh!
00:37:36 Randinger with
00:37:39 You are not gonna believe this.!
00:37:41 The Comebacks score.!
00:37:49 How was it, son, everything
00:37:53 Hey, thought you
00:37:55 Get away! Get away!
00:37:58 Aah!
00:38:00 Blue-22! Blue-22!
00:38:03 Hut!
00:38:07 Yes!
00:38:10 He knows our playbook.
00:38:11 What? How is that possible?
00:38:14 Freddie knows all my secrets,
00:38:16 Where I get all my plays.
00:38:25 What are we gonna do?
00:38:27 Someone else has
00:38:30 Someone Freddie
00:38:33 Someone who thinks
00:38:37 I Pod!
00:38:39 I Pod. Hey, there, little buddy.
00:38:42 How would you like
00:38:45 Help us win
00:38:46 What do you say?
00:38:49 What do I say?
00:38:50 Man, I been waiting all season
00:38:53 Dude, I have been humping legs,
00:38:55 Carrying this...
00:38:56 Stupid cord all over
00:38:58 And now, fourth quarter
00:39:01 You come and ask me for...
00:39:03 All right, all right!
00:39:05 Get out of my...
00:39:07 Watch yourself, watch yourself.
00:39:09 All right, everybody, come on.
00:39:12 974-Wing bandit.
00:39:14 - Let's go get 'em!
00:39:21 Audible!
00:39:23 Let's switch it up!
00:39:26 Shift!
00:39:32 Shift!
00:39:39 What the heck is that?
00:39:40 That... is the
00:39:53 Hut!
00:39:55 Trotter... back to Truman...
00:40:00 ...back to Trotter...
00:40:02 Who scores!
00:40:04 I mean, that was incredible!
00:40:06 Phenomenal!
00:40:08 Coach Wiseman
00:40:10 As the Comebacks only trail
00:40:12 By one touchdown.
00:40:15 It's fourth and goal.
00:40:17 With just seconds remaining,
00:40:20 Lies in the hands
00:40:23 Ref! Time out!
00:40:27 I can't do it, Coach.
00:40:28 What's the problem?
00:40:30 What if I drop the ball?
00:40:32 And what if you don't?
00:40:36 Damn!
00:40:39 Give me your hands.
00:40:46 Aw, geez!
00:40:47 Lance.
00:40:49 Yeah?
00:40:50 Do it for me.
00:40:54 Okay.
00:40:55 Okay.
00:40:56 We can do this, guys.
00:40:59 Yeah!
00:41:04 Let's do this! Oh!
00:41:08 - Yeah, Lance!
00:41:09 Set!
00:41:12 Hut!
00:41:18 Hold on to it, Lance.
00:41:27 Yeah!
00:41:36 Get out there, Jiz!
00:41:37 Wait.
00:41:39 We're not playing for the tie.
00:41:42 I say we go for the win!
00:41:45 Get out there!
00:41:48 They're going for two?
00:41:50 Don't worry.
00:41:51 I got one more page
00:41:59 Set!
00:42:01 Looks like the Unbeatables coach,
00:42:02 Freddie Wiseman, has entered
00:42:06 Time out, Comebacks.
00:42:11 John, something weird seems to
00:42:15 Yeah, it looks like Lambeau Fields
00:42:16 Was suiting up.
00:42:19 For the two-Point
00:42:23 Coach!
00:42:25 Coach!
00:42:27 It's me, honey! I'm here!
00:42:47 I'd give anything for one last shot.
00:42:51 Because that's what you do,
00:42:54 I want what you and Mom have.
00:42:55 Herpes.
00:42:57 Set! Green-20!
00:43:00 Green-20! Hike!
00:43:13 Yeah!
00:43:17 The Comebacks did it!
00:43:18 Coach Fields
00:43:20 The Comebacks win!
00:43:21 Do you believe in miracles?
00:43:22 Yes!
00:43:23 How long
00:43:25 The Comebacks have won.!
00:43:27 They beat the Unbeatables.!
00:43:28 Phenomenal.!
00:43:32 We did it! We did it!
00:43:40 My shit goin'
00:43:43 - Dude, guess what!
00:43:44 My parents just said we
00:43:46 In the Hamptons for
00:43:47 - No way! Oh, my God!
00:43:49 And I get a real tattoo!
00:44:05 I love you, Dad.
00:44:11 - My boy!
00:44:14 Coach! Coach!
00:44:21 I'm okay.
00:44:23 Barbara!
00:44:26 Coa...
00:44:27 Oh!
00:44:28 Barbara!
00:44:30 Oh, God! Oh! Oh! Oh!
00:44:32 Barb!
00:44:38 Barb!
00:44:43 Get out of my way!
00:44:45 Coach! Coach!
00:44:47 Oh! I'm so sorry.
00:44:49 I love you so much.
00:44:51 I love you, too.
00:44:53 I'm a winner, Barb.
00:44:56 I'm hanging up
00:44:58 I'm never gonna
00:45:00 Before you and the
00:45:09 Uh, Coach Fields?
00:45:11 Coach Fields, excuse me?
00:45:13 Name's Gabe Low.
00:45:15 I'm looking for a new
00:45:17 At Sequel University,
00:45:19 And I think you're
00:45:21 Well, mister,
00:45:23 I sure don't know anything
00:45:28 ...but I'll take it!
00:45:30 Coach, how does it feel
00:45:33 To finally win
00:45:34 Um... to be honest,
00:45:42 I thought
00:46:39 You guys are ripping me apart!
00:47:23 Let's do it!
00:47:25 I think we're gonna need
00:47:29 All right, huddle up!
00:47:31 Break!
00:47:33 Lend an ear, take a knee.
00:47:39 Clock's running down.
00:47:40 The game is on the line.
00:47:42 No time outs left.
00:47:44 Not gonna go for the tie.
00:47:47 This time I'm gonna win!
00:47:50 See an open door!
00:47:54 Gonna walk right in!
00:48:30 Nobody shed a tear
00:48:34 At least, not after he...
00:48:36 "Borrowed" $200,000
00:48:40 Moved his athletic ass
00:48:43 And entered into a consensual
00:48:46 With two
00:48:51 Adios, y'all.
00:48:55 Aw, Scruffy!
00:48:59 I think we nailed it!
00:53:00 Thank you! Good night!