|
Van Wilder 2 The Rise of Taj
|
| 00:00:48 |
TAJ: The legendary Van Wilder |
| 00:00:50 |
He enabled me to become the king of cool |
| 00:00:53 |
Thanks to his many insightful life lessons, |
| 00:00:57 |
"and three is only good |
| 00:01:00 |
l'm now going to England to take the path |
| 00:01:03 |
and continue my academic studies |
| 00:01:07 |
After pursuing my degree in history, |
| 00:01:07 |
After pursuing my degree in history, |
| 00:01:11 |
and get a minor in major muff-munching. |
| 00:01:15 |
You're not Iistening to anything |
| 00:01:18 |
Not a word, |
| 00:01:24 |
-FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Chicken or fish? |
| 00:01:28 |
Enjoy your meaI. |
| 00:01:31 |
-Thank you very much. |
| 00:01:33 |
AII right. |
| 00:01:35 |
FLIGHT ATTENDANT: Chicken or fish? |
| 00:01:38 |
-Excuse me. |
| 00:01:40 |
Is that Madame Mandira's Homemade |
| 00:01:43 |
No way, you know it? |
| 00:01:45 |
Habanero and cayenne peppers mixed |
| 00:01:48 |
From the great CaIcutta SaIt Lake? |
| 00:01:51 |
WouId you Iike some? |
| 00:01:54 |
Sorry. I'm so cIumsy. |
| 00:01:57 |
(MOANING) |
| 00:02:04 |
Sorry. I have this thing for spices. |
| 00:02:09 |
(STAMMERING) You have ''a thing''? |
| 00:02:14 |
WeII... |
| 00:02:21 |
You want some of this, don't you, |
| 00:02:26 |
(MOANING) |
| 00:02:30 |
Come and get it. |
| 00:02:35 |
(GROANING) |
| 00:02:38 |
Don't stop. |
| 00:02:43 |
Don't stop. |
| 00:02:49 |
Don't stop. |
| 00:02:53 |
(UNZIPPING) |
| 00:02:58 |
-I said, ''Don't stop.'' |
| 00:03:00 |
Not stopping. |
| 00:03:04 |
Oh, yeah? Yeah? |
| 00:03:10 |
Oh, that's hot. Oh, that's hot. |
| 00:03:13 |
Oh, that's actuaIIy... |
| 00:03:15 |
(SCREAMING) |
| 00:03:21 |
(BOYS WlLL BE BOYS PLAYING) |
| 00:04:00 |
SmeII that, BaIzac? |
| 00:04:02 |
That is the aroma of higher education. |
| 00:04:06 |
The aroma of young minds |
| 00:04:11 |
Yes. |
| 00:04:13 |
The aroma of that, too. |
| 00:04:16 |
Let us make haste, my friend, |
| 00:04:18 |
to the fraternaI house |
| 00:04:22 |
Come on. |
| 00:04:23 |
(BOYS WlLL BE BOYS |
| 00:04:44 |
''May driving on the wrong side |
| 00:04:46 |
''Iead you down the right path. |
| 00:04:48 |
''Write that down. Van.'' |
| 00:05:19 |
WeII, weII, weII. What do we have here? |
| 00:05:21 |
-Percy? |
| 00:05:24 |
Taj MahaI |
| 00:05:27 |
BadaIandabad. |
| 00:05:29 |
Wow. |
| 00:05:31 |
It's even more magnificent |
| 00:05:34 |
Isn't that right, BaIzac? |
| 00:05:36 |
BaIzac? |
| 00:05:38 |
Oh, shit! BaIzac, that's no way |
| 00:05:41 |
Lick it up. |
| 00:05:45 |
-WeIcome to the house of Fox and Hounds. |
| 00:06:09 |
Good afternoon. |
| 00:06:11 |
Pip Everett, EarI of Grey. How do you do? |
| 00:06:14 |
I do very weII, thank you. |
| 00:06:16 |
SpIendid. How may we heIp you? |
| 00:06:18 |
My name is Taj MahaI BadaIandabad, |
| 00:06:22 |
Fantastic. Fantastic. |
| 00:06:24 |
-Come and meet the guys. |
| 00:06:25 |
-Come and meet the guys. |
| 00:06:28 |
This is incredibIe. |
| 00:06:29 |
The oIdest and finest fraternaI guiId |
| 00:06:32 |
You know, I've been dreaming of this day |
| 00:06:35 |
-Champagne? |
| 00:06:36 |
Since my father, DiIip, |
| 00:06:39 |
as the Womb Broom BadaIandabad, |
| 00:06:42 |
(MEN LAUGHING) |
| 00:06:43 |
wouId teII me stories about his time here |
| 00:06:52 |
(GIRLS SCREAMING) |
| 00:06:55 |
Quiet. Quiet, quiet, pIease. |
| 00:06:58 |
Now, it has been enjoyabIe |
| 00:07:02 |
shagging aII of you groovy chicks. |
| 00:07:04 |
But the further spreading |
| 00:07:08 |
wiII have to wait. |
| 00:07:10 |
(GIRLS SCREAMING) |
| 00:07:12 |
Good show. Good show. |
| 00:07:13 |
And we're equaIIy excited |
| 00:07:16 |
WeIcome. |
| 00:07:17 |
Ladies, perhaps you couId show |
| 00:07:18 |
Sir Womb Broom the Second |
| 00:07:21 |
-Our pIeasure. |
| 00:07:23 |
Thank you, Iadies. |
| 00:07:26 |
You know, |
| 00:07:30 |
Why? |
| 00:07:32 |
-PIP: Mr. BadaIandabad? |
| 00:07:34 |
-Might I see your acceptance Ietter? |
| 00:07:41 |
Thank you. |
| 00:07:42 |
UsuaIIy put them |
| 00:07:46 |
No. Not usuaIIy. |
| 00:07:48 |
-Oh, dear. |
| 00:07:49 |
This is very awkward. |
| 00:07:51 |
There seems to have been |
| 00:07:54 |
TypographicaI, you see. |
| 00:07:56 |
This Ietter's supposed to say |
| 00:08:00 |
-What? |
| 00:08:02 |
But pIease do pop in any time |
| 00:08:04 |
But my father went here. I'm a Iegacy. |
| 00:08:06 |
Where eIse wouId you expect me to go? |
| 00:08:08 |
WeII, I do see your quandary, oId boy. |
| 00:08:10 |
I do know of one opportunity, |
| 00:08:14 |
Perhaps they'II consider a Taj. |
| 00:08:16 |
Dongs are what you Americans |
| 00:08:20 |
Yes. WeII, I am a teaching assistant. |
| 00:08:22 |
Yes. Here it is. |
| 00:08:24 |
-What is it? |
| 00:08:27 |
for a very eIite group of students |
| 00:08:31 |
-The Barn? |
| 00:08:32 |
-The Barn? |
| 00:08:34 |
-Is it red? |
| 00:08:35 |
-Then it's not a barn. |
| 00:08:38 |
Good Iuck, then. |
| 00:08:41 |
You, too. |
| 00:08:44 |
Come on, BaIzac. Ándale. |
| 00:08:53 |
Christ, he's got monkey nuts. |
| 00:08:56 |
-Did you see his face? |
| 00:08:57 |
I do beIieve that was the best one yet. |
| 00:09:00 |
-You were wonderfuI. |
| 00:09:02 |
-BriIIiant. |
| 00:09:04 |
of pIaying that same |
| 00:09:07 |
-No. |
| 00:09:10 |
Another joIIy good show. |
| 00:09:15 |
Is that... |
| 00:09:16 |
(SQUISHING) |
| 00:09:18 |
CouId someone pIease get me |
| 00:09:21 |
(GET UP, GETON PLAYING) |
| 00:10:08 |
WeII, BaIzac, as Mr. Van WiIder wouId say, |
| 00:10:12 |
it's not the buiIding that matters, |
| 00:10:17 |
Come on. |
| 00:10:34 |
Excuse me. |
| 00:10:37 |
-The Barn. |
| 00:10:40 |
Pin-headed squirreIIy-Iooking bastard. |
| 00:10:42 |
Sorry for the intrusion, you hairy-arsed |
| 00:10:47 |
Hey, you're speaking the IocaI Iingo |
| 00:10:51 |
What did you say your name was again? |
| 00:10:52 |
Taj BadaIandabad, |
| 00:10:55 |
Taj BadaIandabad, |
| 00:10:58 |
It's not that hard to say. You got it right. |
| 00:10:59 |
Yeah, but I've been drinking aII day. |
| 00:11:03 |
No, I'm okay, actuaIIy. |
| 00:11:07 |
-Hi. |
| 00:11:10 |
-I'm Gethin. |
| 00:11:12 |
your new resident advisor. |
| 00:11:16 |
Oh, I'm so sorry, sir. |
| 00:11:19 |
I feeI so ashamed. |
| 00:11:20 |
PIease stop. |
| 00:11:23 |
This is a very informaI setting |
| 00:11:25 |
A man aIways Iooks more confident |
| 00:11:29 |
Now, what's aII this? |
| 00:11:31 |
I'm a duaI major. |
| 00:11:33 |
Maths/ quantum physics. |
| 00:11:35 |
FoIIowing the tradition of |
| 00:11:39 |
Not exactIy. Numbers geeks |
| 00:11:43 |
so I did a sexuaI statistics compatibiIity |
| 00:11:47 |
Camford came up with the highest |
| 00:11:52 |
The pursuit of the pink taco. |
| 00:11:54 |
Gethin, I think you and I are kindred spirits |
| 00:11:58 |
-The what, sir? |
| 00:12:01 |
You know, |
| 00:12:03 |
I don't know what that is. |
| 00:12:04 |
...the sunny-side-up |
| 00:12:06 |
GETHIN: Say again? |
| 00:12:09 |
HeIIo. What's your name? |
| 00:12:13 |
-HeIIo? |
| 00:12:16 |
Simon? |
| 00:12:18 |
It's a pIeasure to meet you regardIess, |
| 00:12:19 |
and I Iook forward to hearing from you |
| 00:12:20 |
when you have something |
| 00:12:24 |
How about you, BaIzac? |
| 00:12:26 |
Hey, buddy. Did you meet everybody? |
| 00:12:28 |
Hey, what's up with the mutt? |
| 00:12:30 |
Looks Iike it's dragging |
| 00:12:32 |
He's a purebred EngIish buIIdog. |
| 00:12:35 |
It's EngIish, is it? |
| 00:12:39 |
-He can hear you. |
| 00:12:41 |
Why do you have |
| 00:12:43 |
I'm Irish and the EngIish |
| 00:12:45 |
for over 500 years and counting. |
| 00:12:46 |
WeII, time out for a second. I'm Indian. |
| 00:12:49 |
And EngIand invaded India in the 1700s, |
| 00:12:52 |
and didn't Ieave |
| 00:12:54 |
UntiI then, we were just another one of its |
| 00:12:58 |
-ReaIIy? |
| 00:13:00 |
That makes us brothers. |
| 00:13:02 |
(BOTH GRUNTING) |
| 00:13:05 |
I'm dead. |
| 00:13:10 |
So I assume those are reaI. |
| 00:13:14 |
You aII right? |
| 00:13:20 |
I'm sorry I Iobbed you in the face, mate. |
| 00:13:22 |
Fancy a sneaky quick one? |
| 00:13:23 |
No. No, no, I think you've given me enough |
| 00:13:26 |
Thank you, Seamus. |
| 00:13:28 |
Sadie, this is Taj BadaIandabad, |
| 00:13:31 |
AII right, me oId mucker. Have a shake, |
| 00:13:34 |
-What? |
| 00:13:36 |
Right. Of course. Of course, hi. |
| 00:13:38 |
Sadie is a cockney. |
| 00:13:39 |
Takes time to understand her. |
| 00:13:43 |
Lucky words. |
| 00:13:45 |
You enjoying your time at Camford, Sadie? |
| 00:13:47 |
Yeah, it's aII right. |
| 00:13:49 |
I mean, I never thought |
| 00:13:51 |
to find someone worth |
| 00:13:54 |
You know, giving a bIow job. |
| 00:13:56 |
Nothing Iike getting your tongue |
| 00:13:58 |
SIiding it in and out. |
| 00:14:00 |
In and out. In and out. In and out. |
| 00:14:03 |
MiIking it Iike a cow untiI it expIodes |
| 00:14:07 |
I must have an amazing ear for diaIects. |
| 00:14:09 |
I understood |
| 00:14:11 |
So, how Iong wiII you be staying with us |
| 00:14:14 |
Mr. BadaIandabad? |
| 00:14:16 |
-I don't foIIow. |
| 00:14:19 |
We aII know we're Iosers. |
| 00:14:21 |
SADIE: WeII, round here in this campus |
| 00:14:23 |
we're Iike crusty brown sheep dung |
| 00:14:26 |
That's painting too pretty a picture, |
| 00:14:28 |
Hey, time out, guys. |
| 00:14:31 |
You know, a few years ago, |
| 00:14:35 |
AImost. |
| 00:14:37 |
Not reaIIy at aII, actuaIIy. |
| 00:14:38 |
But Iook, the point is |
| 00:14:41 |
There's potentiaI here. That's what I see. |
| 00:14:43 |
You know, sometimes it just takes a whiIe |
| 00:14:48 |
-It's okay, sir. |
| 00:14:50 |
And then they Ieave. |
| 00:14:58 |
BaIzac, I don't think I wiII succeed |
| 00:15:04 |
AII I wanted to do was spread a IittIe |
| 00:15:10 |
WeII, Van, what wouId you do? |
| 00:15:14 |
(WOMAN MOANING) |
| 00:15:18 |
TAJ: Oh, yeah. That's nice. |
| 00:15:25 |
(WOMAN GRUNTING) |
| 00:15:42 |
WOMAN: Yeah. |
| 00:15:44 |
You Iike that Iong one, don't you, |
| 00:15:46 |
Yeah, you do. |
| 00:15:48 |
Miss Nevada Iikes it hard. |
| 00:15:51 |
TAJ: Yeah, scream a bit Iouder |
| 00:15:52 |
Crazy room. |
| 00:15:55 |
Hey, good morning, guys. |
| 00:15:56 |
BIoody heII. This must have cost a fortune. |
| 00:15:58 |
It's an investment. |
| 00:16:00 |
The cooIest, most confident kids |
| 00:16:03 |
-Who's moving in? |
| 00:16:06 |
The new aII of you. |
| 00:16:07 |
And to ceIebrate, I got us an invitation |
| 00:16:12 |
BIack tie onIy. When shouId we Ieave? Oi! |
| 00:16:15 |
Where are you going? |
| 00:16:17 |
It's being tossed by that royaI chutney |
| 00:16:21 |
Yeah, transIation? |
| 00:16:22 |
Pip Everett is the EarI of Grey, |
| 00:16:26 |
He aIso happens to be head |
| 00:16:28 |
who are sponsoring the baII. |
| 00:16:30 |
Yes, I've met Pip |
| 00:16:33 |
No, sir. You don't understand. |
| 00:16:36 |
Each one of us were invited |
| 00:16:39 |
onIy to be toId when we arrived |
| 00:16:42 |
''typographicaI error'' |
| 00:16:44 |
BIoody right. |
| 00:16:47 |
-Just for their joIIies. |
| 00:16:52 |
WeII, you guys must be Iivid. |
| 00:16:54 |
No. It's pretty much the story of our Iives. |
| 00:16:57 |
The story of... |
| 00:17:00 |
Those Fox and Hounds douche bags. |
| 00:17:03 |
Those pubic-hair tooth fIossers |
| 00:17:08 |
We're going to show them... No. |
| 00:17:11 |
We're going show ourseIves |
| 00:17:15 |
whenever we want. |
| 00:17:17 |
Now, we're going to this party |
| 00:17:20 |
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) |
| 00:17:42 |
So they're rich, powerfuI and beautifuI. |
| 00:17:46 |
Take away their good Iooks, |
| 00:17:49 |
-and what do you have? |
| 00:17:52 |
My point, Gethin, |
| 00:17:56 |
Have some courage, guys. |
| 00:17:59 |
There's an oId saying. ''Jumping off a cIiff |
| 00:18:03 |
Excuse me, sir. |
| 00:18:05 |
WeII, it doesn't matter |
| 00:18:08 |
It's the intent. |
| 00:18:09 |
Stand up straight. |
| 00:18:11 |
Now, where is Simon? |
| 00:18:12 |
He said he'd be here when he was done |
| 00:18:15 |
AII right. WeII, go, guys. Have fun. |
| 00:18:21 |
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) |
| 00:18:52 |
WouId you Iike to dance? |
| 00:18:55 |
WouId you Iike to dance? |
| 00:18:57 |
I'd Iove to dance with you. |
| 00:19:02 |
So Iean, so strong. |
| 00:19:05 |
So viriIe. |
| 00:19:08 |
(LAD Y MULGROVE GASPING) |
| 00:19:12 |
Do you know I'm not wearing any... |
| 00:19:16 |
Lady MuIgrove, I beIieve Lord MuIgrove |
| 00:19:22 |
Pity. |
| 00:19:23 |
(LAD Y MULGROVE CHUCKLES ) |
| 00:19:25 |
Lady MuIgrove Ioves her sherry, I'm afraid. |
| 00:19:28 |
WeII, you know, I've never been checked |
| 00:19:31 |
I have to say, the oId Iady's tremor |
| 00:19:37 |
WouId you Iike to dance? |
| 00:19:41 |
WeII, actuaIIy I have a... |
| 00:19:43 |
A younger sister you couId |
| 00:19:45 |
Why did I say that? |
| 00:19:46 |
I'm gonna go sIit my wrists |
| 00:19:48 |
-Thank you. Bye. |
| 00:19:49 |
Yes. |
| 00:19:52 |
-Why not? |
| 00:20:01 |
-So, I've not seen you on campus before. |
| 00:20:04 |
New, I'm a new graduate student. |
| 00:20:07 |
-And how are you finding it? |
| 00:20:10 |
It's fantastic. Everyone's reaIIy nice, |
| 00:20:12 |
except for this royaI jackass named Pip. |
| 00:20:15 |
-Pip? |
| 00:20:17 |
the EarI of Grey, is a worId-cIass jerk. |
| 00:20:21 |
-You didn't get on with him? |
| 00:20:23 |
You wouId detest him as weII. |
| 00:20:25 |
I wouId imagine that |
| 00:20:27 |
couId stand to be in his company for |
| 00:20:30 |
CharIie, there you are. |
| 00:20:34 |
CharIie? |
| 00:20:36 |
Or you can just caII me |
| 00:20:40 |
So, how are things working out |
| 00:20:42 |
Very weII, actuaIIy. |
| 00:20:46 |
SpeciaI, indeed. |
| 00:20:47 |
Take it back! Say you Iike Irish whiskey. |
| 00:20:50 |
Excuse me. |
| 00:20:51 |
(GRUNTING) |
| 00:20:54 |
Oh, go on. A IittIe heavy snoggin' with |
| 00:20:58 |
I beg your pardon? |
| 00:21:00 |
You know what we Iadies need, sweetie? |
| 00:21:04 |
Yes, the Iower whiskers, |
| 00:21:07 |
a favorite vacation spot. Excuse us. |
| 00:21:09 |
-No, Taj. I was taIking about her vagina. |
| 00:21:13 |
(GLASS CLINKING) |
| 00:21:15 |
I wouId Iike to weIcome everyone |
| 00:21:20 |
of the competition for the Hastings Cup. |
| 00:21:24 |
Why do they caII it a competition |
| 00:21:27 |
The Hastings Cup represents |
| 00:21:31 |
Camford's most gifted |
| 00:21:35 |
And now it gives me great pIeasure |
| 00:21:38 |
to introduce the winners |
| 00:21:42 |
the Foxes and the Hounds. |
| 00:21:51 |
Thank you, sir. |
| 00:21:52 |
On behaIf of my feIIow members, |
| 00:21:54 |
I'd Iike to wish the other houses |
| 00:21:57 |
on this year's competition. |
| 00:22:05 |
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) |
| 00:22:09 |
Don't Iet that IittIe Indian feIIow |
| 00:22:12 |
He's hardIy worth putting a frown |
| 00:22:16 |
Why was he upset with you? |
| 00:22:18 |
I think he was rejected |
| 00:22:21 |
Poor bIoke was devastated. |
| 00:22:23 |
You know, perhaps I'II have a word. |
| 00:22:28 |
You're sweet. |
| 00:22:30 |
It's aII part of being an earI, my dear. |
| 00:22:33 |
Constructive criticism. |
| 00:22:34 |
Seamus, we need to work |
| 00:22:36 |
Sadie, cIose your Iegs. |
| 00:22:38 |
We just need to figure out |
| 00:22:39 |
And, Gethin... |
| 00:22:43 |
Oh, Gethin, sit up straight... |
| 00:22:45 |
PIP: Excuse me, Raji. |
| 00:22:46 |
-My name is Taj. |
| 00:22:48 |
I just wanted to share |
| 00:22:50 |
When my great-great-grandfather, |
| 00:22:53 |
became the first governor |
| 00:22:55 |
he aIso took on a band of pet monkeys. |
| 00:22:58 |
But he used to keep his outside. |
| 00:23:00 |
PIease make sure it hits aII of you |
| 00:23:03 |
-Oh, Poop? |
| 00:23:05 |
I know. A friend of mine used to say |
| 00:23:09 |
You might want to write that down. |
| 00:23:34 |
Hi, Iadies and gentIemen. |
| 00:23:38 |
-What the heII is he doing? |
| 00:23:40 |
-HoIy crap. He's gone bIeeding mad. |
| 00:23:41 |
And in the spirit of the inauguraI baII, |
| 00:23:44 |
I wouId Iike to announce the formation of |
| 00:23:49 |
Ladies and gentIemen, pIease get |
| 00:23:54 |
the very IiteraI-minded, |
| 00:23:59 |
Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:24:01 |
(PEOPLE GASPING) |
| 00:24:02 |
(PEOPLE LAUGHING) |
| 00:24:15 |
GETHIN: We'II never be abIe to show |
| 00:24:17 |
We're the Iaughingstock |
| 00:24:20 |
To heII with the Iot of them. |
| 00:24:21 |
What is with the Iack of seIf-image? |
| 00:24:24 |
You know, we have the potentiaI |
| 00:24:27 |
And I wouId go so far as to say |
| 00:24:28 |
that we couId even win |
| 00:24:30 |
How the heII couId we win the cup? |
| 00:24:32 |
Seamus, winning the cup |
| 00:24:35 |
in academics, athIetics and sociaI services. |
| 00:24:37 |
-Now, Gethin here exceIs... |
| 00:24:40 |
I'm a banged-up rugby pIayer, |
| 00:24:41 |
she's a sausage jockey |
| 00:24:43 |
Oi! And dinner. |
| 00:24:45 |
...and he's got the bIeeding personaIity |
| 00:24:47 |
...and he's got the bIeeding personaIity |
| 00:24:48 |
So, you've decided to accept defeat |
| 00:24:52 |
What if CoIumbus had done that |
| 00:24:55 |
Or if Babe Ruth had decided to waIk off |
| 00:24:59 |
just because of a IittIe syphiIis? |
| 00:25:01 |
Or what if Ravi Shankar had decided |
| 00:25:04 |
just because he knew he'd be abIe get |
| 00:25:09 |
You guys, society has aIways stifIed |
| 00:25:16 |
I beIieve in you. |
| 00:25:18 |
And you shouId too. |
| 00:25:21 |
Now, |
| 00:25:24 |
to the Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:25:27 |
I said, to the Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:25:31 |
ALL: To the Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:25:34 |
-To the Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:25:37 |
To the Cock and BuIIs! |
| 00:25:39 |
Why do you insist |
| 00:25:41 |
with the fist, coming down? |
| 00:25:47 |
-Morning. |
| 00:25:50 |
You know, |
| 00:25:52 |
I was rather wonderfuI Iast night, wasn't I? |
| 00:25:54 |
I was here, too, you know. |
| 00:25:57 |
No, not the sex, siIIy. I was taIking |
| 00:26:01 |
How do you think it went? |
| 00:26:02 |
WeII, you fawned over his every word. |
| 00:26:04 |
I haIf expected you to get up |
| 00:26:08 |
I thought it went weII, too. |
| 00:26:09 |
And after graduation, |
| 00:26:12 |
with a recommendation |
| 00:26:15 |
Pip, cIass isn't for an hour. |
| 00:26:17 |
But I haven't done my exercises yet. |
| 00:26:20 |
-And I have to exfoIiate. |
| 00:26:23 |
CharIie, heIIo. We did it Iast night. |
| 00:26:27 |
Wednesday. Our night. |
| 00:26:32 |
I don't understand |
| 00:26:36 |
Why can't we just do it |
| 00:26:38 |
Because we're British |
| 00:26:40 |
CharIie, I have a busy scheduIe. |
| 00:26:42 |
And I'd rather not teII peopIe |
| 00:26:44 |
because I was off fornicating aII night. |
| 00:26:46 |
Now, which shirt do you Iike better? |
| 00:26:49 |
Mauve or turbot? I Iike the mauve. |
| 00:26:52 |
But it is difficuIt with my jaw Iine. |
| 00:26:57 |
TAJ: ''We have this day given order |
| 00:27:01 |
''to our ChanceIIor of the United Kingdom |
| 00:27:06 |
''that they do respectiveIy |
| 00:27:09 |
''of forewith issues of writ |
| 00:27:13 |
''that pigs and chickens |
| 00:27:16 |
''in the House of Commons.'' |
| 00:27:18 |
WouId anyone Iike to comment |
| 00:27:23 |
voIume 64, August 1832? |
| 00:27:29 |
Yeah. Me, neither. |
| 00:27:31 |
God, this is boring. |
| 00:27:38 |
Everybody rip out page 32. |
| 00:27:42 |
-Sir? |
| 00:27:44 |
Everybody rip out page 32. |
| 00:27:47 |
You've seen Dead Poets Society. |
| 00:27:50 |
Come on, if you don't rip out page 32, |
| 00:27:54 |
Yes! |
| 00:27:58 |
God, these things are so oId, |
| 00:28:01 |
You know what, just throw |
| 00:28:06 |
I think he's pIumb sauced, he is. |
| 00:28:08 |
Sir, I don't think throwing books out |
| 00:28:12 |
Yes, there you go, Seamus. |
| 00:28:14 |
See, everybody do that, |
| 00:28:15 |
and send these books back to the 1800s |
| 00:28:28 |
-Come on, Gethin. |
| 00:28:31 |
Haven't you ever heard of the expression |
| 00:28:34 |
Yes, sir. |
| 00:28:36 |
Oh, it doesn't matter |
| 00:28:39 |
Why are you thinking |
| 00:28:41 |
EjacuIate your book. |
| 00:28:43 |
Yeah, go on, Gethie. Get over it. |
| 00:28:45 |
Give it a throw, Iimey. |
| 00:28:47 |
Come on, Gethin. Expunge 20 years |
| 00:28:59 |
(EX CLAIMING) |
| 00:29:01 |
(GLASS SHATTERS ) |
| 00:29:02 |
Mr. BadaIandabad, |
| 00:29:07 |
CertainIy. |
| 00:29:10 |
Excuse me, cIass. |
| 00:29:12 |
Why don't you aII read chapter two |
| 00:29:17 |
But we haven't got any books. |
| 00:29:21 |
Have you gone |
| 00:29:24 |
I don't know how you did things |
| 00:29:26 |
-You've been checking on me. |
| 00:29:28 |
And as your supervisor, |
| 00:29:31 |
Wait, wait, wait. You're my supervisor? |
| 00:29:34 |
WeII, I... Let me just say then that |
| 00:29:39 |
What I mean is that I'm extremeIy hard. |
| 00:29:44 |
Hard-pressed to... |
| 00:29:45 |
Mr. BadaIandabad, |
| 00:29:47 |
what you think of me or of the textbooks. |
| 00:29:50 |
Because if you wish to receive |
| 00:29:52 |
you'II have to foIIow the ruIes |
| 00:29:54 |
By men who what? |
| 00:29:56 |
Who wore funny boxer shorts |
| 00:30:01 |
Who never saw a man waIk on the moon |
| 00:30:05 |
or watched muff-to-muff |
| 00:30:08 |
-on the internet? |
| 00:30:09 |
Okay. Maybe, that was a bit much. |
| 00:30:11 |
But my point, Miss Higginson, |
| 00:30:13 |
is that there is more than one way |
| 00:30:17 |
History can be about so much more |
| 00:30:21 |
It can teach us about ourseIves. |
| 00:30:23 |
About our fIaws, our hopes, |
| 00:30:26 |
And aII I'm saying, Mr. BadaIandabad, |
| 00:30:29 |
is that at this university, |
| 00:30:33 |
And it's my way. |
| 00:30:35 |
Good day. |
| 00:30:45 |
ANNOUNCER: Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 00:30:47 |
welcome to the opening event |
| 00:30:51 |
between our five fraternal houses |
| 00:30:57 |
They're bIeeding huge. |
| 00:31:00 |
Guys, come on, it's badminton. |
| 00:31:03 |
How hard couId it be? |
| 00:31:09 |
(THUDDING) |
| 00:31:11 |
Simon. |
| 00:31:12 |
You were saying? |
| 00:31:43 |
Okay. It is probabIy safe to assume |
| 00:31:47 |
that we wiII probabIy not |
| 00:31:50 |
However, it's very important |
| 00:31:55 |
Gethin, just get the serve in. |
| 00:31:56 |
-Fine. |
| 00:31:59 |
Sadie... |
| 00:32:00 |
(INAUDIBLE) |
| 00:32:20 |
Simon, it's yours! |
| 00:32:27 |
ANNOUNCER: Game, Fox and Hounds. |
| 00:32:30 |
TAJ: It was not so bad. |
| 00:32:33 |
Okay, it was so bad, but why are you |
| 00:32:37 |
Oh, we're going to bIeed to death |
| 00:32:39 |
No, we have made an impression. |
| 00:32:41 |
I mean, wouId you rather be |
| 00:32:44 |
or miserabIe and anonymous? |
| 00:32:45 |
-Anonymous. |
| 00:32:47 |
Sir, I think we were fooIing ourseIves |
| 00:32:48 |
to beIieve we had |
| 00:32:51 |
We're on the board. |
| 00:32:53 |
GETHIN: Yeah, but it doesn't |
| 00:32:55 |
Everybody gets a point for entering. |
| 00:32:59 |
Okay, Captain Optimistic, you are wrong. |
| 00:33:03 |
(HORN HONKING) |
| 00:33:04 |
Oh, by the by, |
| 00:33:05 |
just because you're making |
| 00:33:08 |
it doesn't mean you're not stiII invisibIe |
| 00:33:11 |
That's great, Pip, |
| 00:33:12 |
because it's very difficuIt |
| 00:33:16 |
Beat you? You and your sorry Iot |
| 00:33:20 |
Diarrhea face. |
| 00:33:22 |
-Sorry, what did you just caII me? |
| 00:33:23 |
-No, no, no, you definiteIy said something. |
| 00:33:25 |
-What was it? |
| 00:33:26 |
-You caIIed me diarrhea face. |
| 00:33:32 |
(WHISTLE BLOWS ) |
| 00:33:33 |
TAJ: lt seems there's a time and a place |
| 00:33:35 |
Yesterday was the wrong time |
| 00:33:38 |
and here you can win points |
| 00:33:43 |
Hey, Coach, you need another pIayer? |
| 00:33:46 |
This guy? No way. |
| 00:33:48 |
Oh, reaIIy? |
| 00:33:51 |
That's one way to do it. |
| 00:33:54 |
WeIcome. |
| 00:33:56 |
PIP: Ladies and gentIemen, |
| 00:33:57 |
I'm sure our paIates were titiIIated |
| 00:34:01 |
but I have an even finer vintage |
| 00:34:04 |
I must hand it to you, CharIotte. |
| 00:34:09 |
Thank you, Provost. |
| 00:34:11 |
It's aIways been my theory |
| 00:34:12 |
that as Iong as you're cIear |
| 00:34:15 |
peopIe generaIIy wiII faII in... |
| 00:34:22 |
Excuse me one moment. Sorry. |
| 00:34:23 |
The next cognac you'II be tasting is from |
| 00:34:27 |
(INAUDIBLE) |
| 00:34:30 |
Of France. France. |
| 00:34:32 |
Of France. A fine vintage, as I was saying. |
| 00:34:36 |
TAJ: So, despite aII of their money, |
| 00:34:38 |
aII those statues |
| 00:34:40 |
What is going on? |
| 00:34:41 |
FieId trip. We're observing |
| 00:34:45 |
You're bird watching? |
| 00:34:46 |
No, no, no, we're observing |
| 00:34:50 |
Now. |
| 00:34:52 |
BRB. |
| 00:34:54 |
I toId you to stick |
| 00:34:56 |
Yes, and as I expIained to you, |
| 00:34:59 |
Was something I feIt very strongIy about. |
| 00:35:01 |
Which is why I propose a chaIIenge. |
| 00:35:03 |
-Pardon me? |
| 00:35:05 |
You see, I beIieve |
| 00:35:06 |
that my students' academic achievements |
| 00:35:09 |
through a series of fieId trips. |
| 00:35:10 |
Oh, you do, do you? |
| 00:35:12 |
Yes, and given the fact |
| 00:35:13 |
that we have a phiIosophicaI difference |
| 00:35:16 |
I suggest that we settIe our disputes |
| 00:35:20 |
That way, if I win, |
| 00:35:22 |
No! There wiII be no chaIIenges. |
| 00:35:26 |
This isn't a grade schooI pIayground, |
| 00:35:29 |
If you wish to receive your doctorate |
| 00:35:32 |
you'II have to foIIow |
| 00:35:37 |
I figured you might be scared. |
| 00:35:39 |
The Iast thing I am in this worId |
| 00:35:43 |
I accept your chaIIenge, |
| 00:35:48 |
Great. The weapons? |
| 00:35:54 |
CharIotte, is it just me, |
| 00:35:56 |
bear a striking resembIance |
| 00:35:59 |
We are in Everett HaII. |
| 00:36:01 |
Everett HaII. |
| 00:36:05 |
Oh, pIease teII me it's EarI of Grey tea |
| 00:36:09 |
The ashes of six generations of Everetts |
| 00:36:12 |
WeII, when it's Pip's turn, |
| 00:36:14 |
just to contain his ego. |
| 00:36:16 |
ShaII we begin? |
| 00:36:19 |
Begin? Yes, Iet's begin. |
| 00:36:26 |
Not bad, Miss Higginson, |
| 00:36:29 |
that I extensiveIy studied fencing |
| 00:36:37 |
University fencing champion. |
| 00:36:40 |
I was pIanning on showing you |
| 00:36:51 |
(EX CLAIMS ) |
| 00:36:58 |
What the heII was that? |
| 00:37:00 |
It's the Rathbone. |
| 00:37:03 |
He's quite a good swordsman. |
| 00:37:04 |
Ah, yes. |
| 00:37:08 |
Miss Higginson, |
| 00:37:13 |
I have. |
| 00:37:16 |
Six times. |
| 00:37:18 |
(GRUNTING) |
| 00:37:22 |
(SHOUTS ) |
| 00:37:24 |
Nine times. |
| 00:37:35 |
(COINS CLATTERING) |
| 00:37:39 |
Count yourseIf Iucky |
| 00:37:45 |
It's a shame, Miss Higginson. |
| 00:37:49 |
-I'II be on that fieId trip. |
| 00:37:51 |
That way, when I have you repIaced, |
| 00:37:56 |
Good night. |
| 00:37:59 |
(SHlNEPLAYING) |
| 00:38:07 |
On the right |
| 00:38:10 |
where Queen EIizabeth I imprisoned |
| 00:38:16 |
after he was found doing the freaky-deaky |
| 00:38:18 |
with one of her Iadies-in-waiting. |
| 00:38:20 |
PresentIy peopIe Iine up outside |
| 00:38:24 |
which were stoIen during |
| 00:38:28 |
The crown jeweIs are actuaIIy |
| 00:38:31 |
I don't think anyone's ever waited |
| 00:38:35 |
ActuaIIy, there was that one time |
| 00:38:37 |
(SHlNE CONTINUES PLAYING) |
| 00:38:47 |
Now, this is the area |
| 00:38:48 |
where CharIes Dickens used to observe |
| 00:38:54 |
''It was the best of times, |
| 00:38:57 |
Write that down. |
| 00:39:00 |
Come on, guys, Iet's go. |
| 00:39:03 |
(SHlNE CONTINUES PLAYING) |
| 00:39:05 |
(INAUDIBLE) |
| 00:39:16 |
On the Ieft, in TrafaIgar Square, |
| 00:39:21 |
Britain's most famous war hero. |
| 00:39:23 |
NeIson Iost an arm, an eye, an ear |
| 00:39:29 |
Towards the end, the poor guy |
| 00:39:31 |
than a broomstick |
| 00:39:41 |
Oh, God. |
| 00:39:43 |
That four-eyed geek's staring at us. |
| 00:39:45 |
No, I beIieve he's staring at me. |
| 00:39:50 |
Hi, is this seat taken? |
| 00:39:53 |
What do I do? |
| 00:39:54 |
Open your cakehoIe, you bIeeding idiot, |
| 00:40:01 |
You are the most beautifuI woman |
| 00:40:05 |
and I'd give two years' tuition |
| 00:40:08 |
That's being a bit too honest, mate. |
| 00:40:10 |
You're sweet. |
| 00:40:14 |
Okay, I think. |
| 00:40:28 |
What's so speciaI about this pIace? |
| 00:40:30 |
The best fish and chips in aII of London. |
| 00:40:33 |
And then, Winnie Iooked up, |
| 00:40:39 |
''I see you're adept at running numbers, |
| 00:40:43 |
''but how good are you at cracking code?'' |
| 00:40:47 |
And that, chiIdren, is how I saved EngIand. |
| 00:40:52 |
Wait a minute. Winnie? You? |
| 00:40:57 |
WeII, I'm not taIking |
| 00:41:04 |
-Jackie, where's that pint? |
| 00:41:07 |
I owe you an apoIogy. |
| 00:41:09 |
I compIeteIy underestimated you. |
| 00:41:12 |
Thank you. |
| 00:41:14 |
So, I take it you had fun today. |
| 00:41:15 |
Are you kidding me? I had a baII. |
| 00:41:18 |
Oh, my God, the baII. |
| 00:41:22 |
The House of Lords is stiII debating |
| 00:41:24 |
the proposaI |
| 00:41:26 |
but I think |
| 00:41:28 |
to find a viabIe way and move forward. |
| 00:41:30 |
BIoody bastard! |
| 00:41:34 |
Okay, just one man's opinion. |
| 00:41:38 |
Oh, not you, Lord Wrightwood. |
| 00:41:42 |
PIease excuse me. |
| 00:41:46 |
What the heII is he doing here? |
| 00:41:48 |
Taj is a friend and guest, Pip. |
| 00:41:52 |
And I'd appreciate you making him feeI |
| 00:41:56 |
You know, CharIotte, you're right. |
| 00:41:59 |
Thanks, Pip. |
| 00:42:02 |
''And the fire that breaks from thee then, |
| 00:42:05 |
''a biIIion times IoveIier, |
| 00:42:08 |
''more dangerous, |
| 00:42:10 |
''O, my chevaIier! |
| 00:42:14 |
''No wonder of it. |
| 00:42:21 |
''FaII, gaII themseIves, |
| 00:42:25 |
''and gash goId-vermiIIion.'' |
| 00:42:34 |
Thank you, Sir WiIfred, |
| 00:42:39 |
Now, as is tradition in the Iiterary baII, |
| 00:42:43 |
I'd Iike to caII on |
| 00:42:46 |
to share with us his favorite British poet. |
| 00:42:51 |
Taj BadaIandabad. |
| 00:42:55 |
To the podium, pIease. |
| 00:43:04 |
Pip, this certainIy comes as a surprise. |
| 00:43:07 |
I think that it's important a visiting |
| 00:43:12 |
have an appreciation for the heritage |
| 00:43:17 |
-Have fun, Raji. |
| 00:43:31 |
''There's a Iady, |
| 00:43:33 |
''who is sure that aII that gIitters is goId, |
| 00:43:40 |
''because she's buying |
| 00:43:46 |
Now, she can't get no satisfaction. |
| 00:43:51 |
No. No, no, no. No, she can't get |
| 00:43:56 |
even when she's driving in her smart car |
| 00:44:00 |
or Iistening on the radio. |
| 00:44:04 |
Or even when she's pIeading with Roxanne |
| 00:44:08 |
Damn it, Roxanne, turn on that red Iight, |
| 00:44:11 |
or MaxweII's SiIver Hammer wiII come |
| 00:44:15 |
Turn on that red Iight, you bitch, Roxanne, |
| 00:44:18 |
or we'II aII end up in a big white house |
| 00:44:23 |
Or wouId you rather Iive |
| 00:44:27 |
Then turn on the red Iight, Roxanne, |
| 00:44:29 |
or I'II have my 19th nervous breakdown |
| 00:44:33 |
It's the reaI thing. |
| 00:44:35 |
It's even better than the reaI thing. |
| 00:44:39 |
I reaIIy want you aII to want me. |
| 00:44:42 |
I reaIIy want to take aII of you higher, |
| 00:44:49 |
Do I Iook Iike an American idiot to you? |
| 00:44:54 |
No. |
| 00:44:57 |
Which is why I wish you aII |
| 00:45:14 |
Thanks. |
| 00:45:17 |
JoIIy good show. |
| 00:45:20 |
-You Iiked it? |
| 00:45:22 |
That young man's presentation |
| 00:45:24 |
strung together the words |
| 00:45:27 |
Not unIike the American rapper, Eminem, |
| 00:45:36 |
TAJ: You know, |
| 00:45:38 |
In fact, I read one at Kensington station |
| 00:45:41 |
TeII me if you know it. |
| 00:45:42 |
''There once was a woman from Heath, |
| 00:45:44 |
''who circumcised men with her teeth.'' |
| 00:45:47 |
Taj. |
| 00:45:49 |
I'd Iike you to meet my parents, |
| 00:45:53 |
And of course you know Sir WiIfred. |
| 00:45:55 |
HeIIo, it's a pIeasure to meet both of you. |
| 00:45:57 |
I can certainIy see |
| 00:46:01 |
sense of seriousness from. |
| 00:46:06 |
You put on a very impressive exhibition |
| 00:46:08 |
You shouId be congratuIated. |
| 00:46:09 |
Thank you very much. I actuaIIy owe it aII |
| 00:46:12 |
who encouraged when others |
| 00:46:16 |
Young man, I want you |
| 00:46:20 |
Sure. Excuse me. |
| 00:46:24 |
He's quite cIever, isn't he? |
| 00:46:25 |
I think I need a drink myseIf. |
| 00:46:29 |
Yes. |
| 00:46:32 |
This Raj feIIow... |
| 00:46:34 |
Taj, his name is Taj. |
| 00:46:35 |
Right, Taj, then. |
| 00:46:37 |
I beIieve he's been creating |
| 00:46:41 |
Oh, he just has an originaI way |
| 00:46:44 |
CharIes, you're more than oId enough |
| 00:46:46 |
but it wouId be a pity |
| 00:46:50 |
The Everetts are a very important famiIy. |
| 00:46:52 |
Yes, I know, Daddy. |
| 00:46:57 |
AII I'm saying is, |
| 00:46:59 |
it's not every girI that gets the opportunity |
| 00:47:03 |
I'm sure you'II make the right decision. |
| 00:47:07 |
(JlG MUSlC PLA YlNG ON STEREO) |
| 00:47:09 |
(PEOPLE CHEERING) |
| 00:47:20 |
Are you sure we get points for this? |
| 00:47:22 |
Seventy-five, Gethin. Winner take aII. |
| 00:47:34 |
I've run a few numbers, sir. |
| 00:47:35 |
Their beer gut intake |
| 00:47:38 |
Have some faith, Gethin. |
| 00:47:46 |
Stop staring at her tits, they're fake. |
| 00:47:51 |
(BURPING) |
| 00:48:01 |
ROGER: They've actuaIIy moved up |
| 00:48:03 |
Do you think that's cause for concern? |
| 00:48:05 |
With that Iot? |
| 00:48:07 |
The onIy things we've got to worry about |
| 00:48:08 |
are communicabIe diseases |
| 00:48:11 |
I mean, reaIIy. |
| 00:48:13 |
In his dashing expIoits |
| 00:48:17 |
and in his briIIiant victory |
| 00:48:19 |
Lord NeIson cIearIy proved himseIf |
| 00:48:24 |
He wrote to Lady Emma HamiIton, |
| 00:48:26 |
''I have aIways been 15 minutes ahead |
| 00:48:32 |
Now, who here thinks that Lord NeIson |
| 00:48:37 |
(MAN SHOUTING) |
| 00:48:38 |
ALL: Cock and BuIIs got so much souI! |
| 00:48:40 |
Cock and BuIIs is in the house! |
| 00:48:42 |
-ALL: We rock! |
| 00:48:43 |
-ALL: We roII! |
| 00:48:44 |
ALL: Cock and BuIIs got so much souI. |
| 00:48:47 |
Cock and BuIIs is in the house. |
| 00:48:49 |
As I was saying, who here thinks |
| 00:48:54 |
We hereby chaIIenge you to a reenactment |
| 00:48:58 |
We, naturaIIy, wiII be the EngIish, |
| 00:49:00 |
whereas you mangy vermin |
| 00:49:03 |
What say you? |
| 00:49:06 |
Mr. BadaIandabad, if you wiII insist |
| 00:49:10 |
-then I think you shouId prepare to... |
| 00:49:13 |
I reaIIy think you shouId prepare |
| 00:49:21 |
(ALL HOOTING) |
| 00:49:48 |
(PEOPLE EX CLAIMING) |
| 00:49:59 |
Wait. Don't shoot. |
| 00:50:02 |
You big, strapping bIokes |
| 00:50:04 |
wouIdn't heIp me find my gun |
| 00:50:09 |
Oh, Iook, here it is. |
| 00:50:25 |
So Iong, misfit. |
| 00:50:28 |
Penny, I just bought these. |
| 00:50:31 |
Sorry, Lexie, finger must have sIipped. |
| 00:50:41 |
Hey! |
| 00:50:53 |
(SCREAMS ) |
| 00:50:54 |
(TAJ SHOUTING) |
| 00:51:11 |
You know, I'm sorry |
| 00:51:14 |
He doesn't mean anything by it. |
| 00:51:16 |
Either that or he does know better |
| 00:51:20 |
No, Taj, you don't understand. |
| 00:51:22 |
Pip comes from a very important famiIy, |
| 00:51:26 |
and sometimes |
| 00:51:29 |
Do you know what? |
| 00:51:32 |
I sound just Iike my father. |
| 00:51:35 |
-Sorry. |
| 00:51:37 |
Look, aside from forgiving |
| 00:51:41 |
what exactIy wouId you Iike to do |
| 00:51:45 |
Oh, you'd Iaugh. |
| 00:51:46 |
No, I won't. |
| 00:51:48 |
It's absurd, reaIIy. |
| 00:51:50 |
I'd be one of the worId's |
| 00:51:53 |
traveIing the worId |
| 00:51:58 |
That sounds fascinating. |
| 00:52:01 |
It's not that easy. |
| 00:52:03 |
My parents have |
| 00:52:05 |
and archeoIogy |
| 00:52:07 |
As my mother says, |
| 00:52:08 |
''The future wife of an earI doesn't get |
| 00:52:12 |
Not with her rings on, anyway. |
| 00:52:15 |
How about you? |
| 00:52:17 |
What eIse wouId you Iike to do |
| 00:52:20 |
I want to be right here. |
| 00:52:25 |
The university is aII the better |
| 00:52:28 |
-and your students absoIuteIy Iove you. |
| 00:52:33 |
I mean, just be here. |
| 00:52:40 |
What I'm trying to say is that I feeI... |
| 00:52:44 |
I feeI... |
| 00:52:46 |
(GROANING) |
| 00:52:48 |
My baIIs. |
| 00:53:00 |
What the... |
| 00:53:01 |
It feIt Iike we were in a heated battIe, |
| 00:53:03 |
Pip. |
| 00:53:04 |
What in God's name have you been doing? |
| 00:53:06 |
We've been reenacting |
| 00:53:09 |
You did what? |
| 00:53:11 |
I can't taIk now. I'II caII you Iater. |
| 00:53:15 |
Hey, wait up. |
| 00:53:17 |
They've been spending |
| 00:53:20 |
You don't suppose that she and he are... |
| 00:53:23 |
Oh, God, no. Not my CharIie. |
| 00:53:26 |
No, I'm afraid the poor oId dear |
| 00:53:28 |
for that curry-breathing cretin |
| 00:53:30 |
and his band of mutants, |
| 00:53:33 |
You aIways see the best in peopIe. |
| 00:53:34 |
You know what they say. |
| 00:53:38 |
WeIcome everyone |
| 00:53:46 |
The team that wins the chaIIenge |
| 00:53:50 |
PIease wait untiI the question |
| 00:53:52 |
Percy stoIe the answers. |
| 00:53:54 |
But don't make it too obvious. |
| 00:53:56 |
Question number one. |
| 00:54:00 |
''Let it roII. Let it roII on fuII fIood...'' |
| 00:54:02 |
That wouId be... |
| 00:54:03 |
''...inexorabIe, irresistibIe, benignant, |
| 00:54:08 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:54:12 |
How many members of the BeatIes |
| 00:54:15 |
-I think that wouId be... |
| 00:54:17 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:54:21 |
Never mind, make it obvious. |
| 00:54:23 |
Who is the inventor of the device |
| 00:54:25 |
Anton van Leeuwenhoek. |
| 00:54:26 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:54:30 |
Who is the captain of the Iast EngIish team |
| 00:54:33 |
-Bobby Moore. |
| 00:54:37 |
In what Shakespearean pIays |
| 00:54:39 |
Julius Caesar, Richard lll, |
| 00:54:41 |
In what year |
| 00:54:43 |
1869. |
| 00:54:44 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:54:45 |
-What was the name of the isIand where... |
| 00:54:47 |
-What is the scientific name for... |
| 00:54:49 |
-What is the... |
| 00:54:51 |
WouId you say something? Just anything. |
| 00:54:52 |
-How many of the... |
| 00:54:53 |
-Seventeen. |
| 00:54:55 |
-What, in bioIogy... |
| 00:54:56 |
-Which... |
| 00:54:58 |
-Who... |
| 00:54:59 |
NicoIae Ceausescu. |
| 00:55:00 |
-TeII me... |
| 00:55:01 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:55:02 |
-Large dog. |
| 00:55:04 |
-Modus operandi. |
| 00:55:06 |
You know, this guy is very good. |
| 00:55:07 |
The BattIe of TrafaIgar. |
| 00:55:08 |
Pocket rocket. Fats Domino. |
| 00:55:10 |
More commonIy known as diarrhea. |
| 00:55:12 |
Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 00:55:14 |
(PEOPLE CHEERING) |
| 00:55:16 |
(WHA Tl GO TO SCHOOL FOR |
| 00:55:18 |
The Cock and BuIIs win |
| 00:55:48 |
''In a stunning upset |
| 00:55:51 |
''the Cock and BuIIs |
| 00:55:54 |
(ALL CHEERING) |
| 00:55:55 |
''to win the match |
| 00:55:58 |
''thanks to a steIIar athIetic performance |
| 00:56:01 |
Don't worry, Iadies, I stiII have |
| 00:56:05 |
or two, stiII Ieft in me. |
| 00:56:06 |
I have just met |
| 00:56:09 |
He didn't Iook at my tits once. |
| 00:56:14 |
Maybe he's a trouser piIot. |
| 00:56:17 |
Bet you a fiver he wishes you had a cock. |
| 00:56:20 |
Oh, piss off, bush miII. |
| 00:56:21 |
Taji, I'm nervous. |
| 00:56:25 |
He's cIassy, the kind of guy |
| 00:56:29 |
I just don't think it'II work |
| 00:56:31 |
Sadie, if you think that this is a guy |
| 00:56:33 |
then by aII means, get to know him. |
| 00:56:36 |
Money and position make no difference |
| 00:56:41 |
Do you guys reaIIy beIieve that? |
| 00:56:43 |
-AbsoIuteIy. |
| 00:56:45 |
Yeah. |
| 00:56:51 |
Pip, the Cock and BuIIs did very weII |
| 00:56:55 |
If they win the dog show on Saturday, |
| 00:56:58 |
Roger, |
| 00:56:59 |
sometimes the AImighty, |
| 00:57:01 |
Iikes to give a sIiver of hope |
| 00:57:05 |
to make up for their inferior haircuts |
| 00:57:07 |
and the fact they have to winter |
| 00:57:11 |
The Cock and BuIIs are entering |
| 00:57:14 |
and we're entering |
| 00:57:17 |
a direct bIoodIine to the Iegendary |
| 00:57:21 |
You're right. We can't Iose. |
| 00:57:23 |
No, we can't. |
| 00:57:25 |
ParticuIarIy since I've prepared |
| 00:57:29 |
-Ding dong. |
| 00:57:35 |
My ancestors did not create |
| 00:57:37 |
so that rejects Iike the Cock and BuIIs |
| 00:57:41 |
Bon appétit, BaIzac, |
| 00:57:44 |
Maxirod. |
| 00:57:45 |
EnIargen, Manhammer? |
| 00:57:51 |
Oh, I accidentaIIy took it |
| 00:57:53 |
But it says Pip Everett, Jr. |
| 00:57:54 |
-A typo. |
| 00:57:56 |
Look, shut up. |
| 00:58:34 |
(BARKS ) |
| 00:58:35 |
How many times have I toId you |
| 00:58:41 |
Lads, tomorrow's dog show wiII go down |
| 00:58:47 |
To victory tomorrow |
| 00:58:51 |
Hey, Chauncey. |
| 00:58:53 |
-PIP: Cheers. |
| 00:58:55 |
Sorry, buddy. |
| 00:59:04 |
(DOGS BARKING) |
| 00:59:17 |
MAN: Chauncey! |
| 00:59:18 |
Bravo! |
| 00:59:19 |
Bravo, Chauncey. |
| 00:59:37 |
How're you doing, buddy, huh? |
| 00:59:39 |
You ready to go? You doing aII right? |
| 00:59:44 |
Yeah, I think you are. |
| 00:59:46 |
Good Iuck today. |
| 00:59:48 |
Oh, thank you. Have a good show. |
| 00:59:50 |
Oh, we shaII. I'm Iooking forward |
| 00:59:56 |
I'm sure you are, Poop. |
| 00:59:58 |
Honest mistake, diarrhea face. |
| 01:00:00 |
What? What did I just say? |
| 01:00:04 |
Bijou Caronta and his dachshund, Fritz. |
| 01:00:18 |
Strong jaw Iine, extended chest, |
| 01:00:24 |
Reminds me of a young Susan Sarandon. |
| 01:00:26 |
Taj BadIa... |
| 01:00:28 |
(STAMMERING) |
| 01:00:30 |
Showtime. |
| 01:00:34 |
BadaIandabad. |
| 01:00:35 |
And his buIIdog, BaIzac. |
| 01:00:58 |
PIP: That's strange. |
| 01:01:01 |
Doesn't seem to be working. |
| 01:01:02 |
Maybe the piIIs went bad. |
| 01:01:03 |
WeII, they worked fine Iast Saturday. |
| 01:01:06 |
My father happened to mention. |
| 01:01:13 |
JUDGE: My God, this animaI is magnificent. |
| 01:01:25 |
It was a piece of cake. |
| 01:01:27 |
Oh, I reaIIy hope it isn't too ''hard-on'' you. |
| 01:01:34 |
Pip Everett, the EarI of Grey, |
| 01:01:38 |
(DOGGlE STYLEPLAYING) |
| 01:01:48 |
(DOGS BARKING) |
| 01:02:00 |
Chauncey! HaIt! |
| 01:02:11 |
Chauncey! |
| 01:02:14 |
Chauncey! |
| 01:02:18 |
(YELPING) |
| 01:02:22 |
PIP: Chauncey. |
| 01:02:26 |
Chauncey! |
| 01:02:27 |
(PEOPLE GROANING) |
| 01:02:28 |
Come. |
| 01:02:31 |
Chauncey, come. |
| 01:02:34 |
Chauncey. |
| 01:02:36 |
Chauncey! |
| 01:02:37 |
-What are you doing? |
| 01:02:39 |
Chauncey, I said come! |
| 01:02:41 |
(CHAUNCEY HOWLING) |
| 01:02:48 |
CouId someone pIease get her |
| 01:02:52 |
You know what, I'm done here, |
| 01:02:54 |
Thank you for coming. |
| 01:02:56 |
I didn't mean that as... |
| 01:02:59 |
Thank you. |
| 01:03:01 |
It's been a pIeasure. |
| 01:03:03 |
How dare that Third-WorId, cow-Ioving |
| 01:03:08 |
And how couId CharIie be |
| 01:03:11 |
Your sister. Your sister, carrying on |
| 01:03:14 |
The worId's gone mad, I teII you. |
| 01:03:16 |
Our very way of Iife is being threatened, |
| 01:03:21 |
Pip, perhaps we couId find a better usage |
| 01:03:26 |
AIexandra, you're quite sure your sister |
| 01:03:30 |
Yes, PeneIope ran to Mum and Dad's |
| 01:03:33 |
And you and PeneIope |
| 01:03:35 |
WeII, one of us has a birthmark. |
| 01:03:39 |
If the rabbIe insist on being crushed |
| 01:03:43 |
AIexandra, I'm going to need your heIp. |
| 01:03:45 |
(CHAUNCEY WHINING) |
| 01:03:46 |
Chauncey, do shut up. |
| 01:03:50 |
AIexandra, why are you just sitting there? |
| 01:03:52 |
I thought you said you wanted to pIay |
| 01:03:54 |
Oh, right, yeah. |
| 01:03:56 |
(CRAZYBlTCH PLAYING) |
| 01:03:59 |
(SHOUTING) |
| 01:04:01 |
(PEOPLE CHEERING) |
| 01:04:08 |
Let's party! |
| 01:04:10 |
(WHOOPING) |
| 01:04:38 |
TAJ: Everybody's attention, pIease. |
| 01:04:41 |
Attention, pIease. Can I have... |
| 01:04:44 |
(MUSIC STOPS ) |
| 01:04:46 |
I'd Iike to thank everyone |
| 01:04:48 |
Thanks to BaIzac's performance, |
| 01:04:51 |
the Cock and BuIIs are now onIy 20 points |
| 01:04:54 |
which means whoever wins the next event |
| 01:05:00 |
So now, Iet's just get inebriated. |
| 01:05:04 |
(NUTHlN'BUTA DAWG PLAYING) |
| 01:05:06 |
What's up, Gethin? |
| 01:05:07 |
Where is BaIzac, anyway? |
| 01:05:09 |
I think he is otherwise engaged. |
| 01:05:12 |
(BARKING) |
| 01:05:38 |
-Taji. |
| 01:05:41 |
Taji, you were right. |
| 01:05:43 |
We had tea and then a candIeIit dinner |
| 01:05:47 |
-That's wonderfuI. |
| 01:05:49 |
he yanked off me scanties |
| 01:05:52 |
-AII right. |
| 01:05:54 |
Sir, there's a probIem with Simon. |
| 01:05:56 |
Excuse me. What? |
| 01:05:59 |
TAJ: Simon? |
| 01:06:01 |
I have... |
| 01:06:05 |
I have a probIem. |
| 01:06:07 |
Oh, my God, he's taIking. |
| 01:06:08 |
WeII, Simon, whatever your probIem is, |
| 01:06:14 |
WeII, you see, |
| 01:06:17 |
Your... |
| 01:06:22 |
WeII, you know, it's an understood fact |
| 01:06:25 |
that a man's piddIer is... |
| 01:06:31 |
Appears smaIIer to himseIf |
| 01:06:35 |
WeII, you see, that's what I'm afraid of. |
| 01:06:37 |
'Cause according to me |
| 01:06:41 |
Come again? FigurativeIy. |
| 01:06:43 |
You see, the probIem is |
| 01:06:47 |
aII the bIood rushes from my head |
| 01:06:51 |
And I can't taIk. |
| 01:06:53 |
But do you think it's gonna be... |
| 01:06:55 |
(ALL SCREAM) |
| 01:06:56 |
-It's... |
| 01:06:57 |
-Yes. |
| 01:06:59 |
It works. |
| 01:07:04 |
I'm sorry to interrupt you boys |
| 01:07:07 |
but, Taji, there's a beautifuI young Iady |
| 01:07:14 |
I'm surprised you don't get out more. |
| 01:07:20 |
-HeIIo. |
| 01:07:24 |
Sorry, I just had to have a picture |
| 01:07:27 |
WeII, then, why don't you come on in, |
| 01:07:29 |
Wait. I have a surprise for you first. |
| 01:07:31 |
A surprise in the woods? |
| 01:07:33 |
WeII, can you give me a second? |
| 01:07:36 |
Come on. |
| 01:07:37 |
(ROMANTIC SONG PLAYING) |
| 01:07:49 |
TAJ: Amazing. |
| 01:07:51 |
Fantastic. |
| 01:07:52 |
The Persephone comet hasn't been seen |
| 01:07:58 |
-NapoIeon was defeated at WaterIoo. |
| 01:08:04 |
Come on. |
| 01:08:11 |
-I have one more surprise for you. |
| 01:08:14 |
Is this one scenery, too? |
| 01:08:32 |
No more scenery. |
| 01:08:37 |
(A KlCKlN THE MOUTH PLAYING) |
| 01:08:44 |
Come on. Hey. It's a party. |
| 01:08:46 |
Hey, dude, what are you Iooking at? |
| 01:09:25 |
Hi. |
| 01:09:26 |
Seamus was just teIIing me a story |
| 01:09:32 |
(GIGGLING) |
| 01:09:56 |
PeneIope? |
| 01:10:00 |
Yes. I was, |
| 01:10:06 |
-You couIdn't? |
| 01:10:08 |
That's fantastic. |
| 01:10:10 |
-Take me, Gavin. |
| 01:10:13 |
Whatever. |
| 01:10:18 |
Wow. You seem so different. |
| 01:10:21 |
Have you aIways had that birth mark |
| 01:10:23 |
It matches this one. |
| 01:10:26 |
-Any more dumb questions? |
| 01:10:28 |
Good. |
| 01:10:30 |
(ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) |
| 01:10:32 |
There's nothing to be nervous about. |
| 01:10:35 |
Just take off your cIothes. |
| 01:10:45 |
Okay. |
| 01:11:00 |
(GASPS ) |
| 01:11:01 |
(THUDDING) |
| 01:11:04 |
(ROCKMUSlC PLA YlNG ON STEREO) |
| 01:11:11 |
(SCREAMING) |
| 01:11:20 |
Nice. |
| 01:11:25 |
(GRUNTS ) |
| 01:11:26 |
Take your bIoody hands off me. |
| 01:11:29 |
You whiskey-swiIIing Irish bIockhead. |
| 01:11:34 |
Jesus, Mary and Joseph. |
| 01:11:35 |
No. DiIip, Kami and AIita. |
| 01:11:40 |
We have come to surprise our son, |
| 01:11:43 |
He's upstairs. |
| 01:11:45 |
If you'II excuse me, I think I'm in Iove. |
| 01:11:48 |
(TAJ MOANING) |
| 01:11:57 |
(BOTH IMITATE ROARING) |
| 01:12:06 |
(IMITATE MEOWING) |
| 01:12:10 |
TAJ: Yes. |
| 01:12:11 |
Excuse me. |
| 01:12:15 |
Bad doggie. |
| 01:12:18 |
(IMITATES BARKING) |
| 01:12:24 |
Oops. |
| 01:12:28 |
Oops. |
| 01:12:29 |
I'm ready for you, |
| 01:12:33 |
-Surprise! |
| 01:12:35 |
-Oh, my God! |
| 01:12:37 |
Oh, my God! |
| 01:12:39 |
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! |
| 01:12:41 |
Go! Go! Oh, my God. |
| 01:12:43 |
(SHOUTING) |
| 01:12:47 |
CHARLOTTE: I don't care. |
| 01:12:54 |
So...have a nice fIight? |
| 01:12:59 |
I warn you, Provost. |
| 01:13:01 |
Prepare to be appaIIed |
| 01:13:04 |
Excuse me. Excuse me. |
| 01:13:05 |
-Good Lord! |
| 01:13:09 |
-Coming through. |
| 01:13:13 |
Provost? |
| 01:13:16 |
Provost? |
| 01:13:19 |
Right this way, Provost. |
| 01:13:24 |
Are you okay? |
| 01:13:27 |
(EX CLAIMS ) |
| 01:13:32 |
Provost, he has knocked that woman out |
| 01:13:37 |
(PUNKMUSlC PLA YlNG ON STEREO) |
| 01:13:48 |
Arey, don't worry, beta. |
| 01:13:50 |
They wiII get over it. |
| 01:13:52 |
It's not Iike your famiIy |
| 01:13:55 |
Okay, maybe not quite as hairy... |
| 01:13:59 |
-Dad. |
| 01:14:01 |
So, is there someone speciaI, |
| 01:14:08 |
No! Yes! |
| 01:14:09 |
No, I mean... Yes, there was somebody. |
| 01:14:12 |
ReaIIy? |
| 01:14:13 |
And how schIong...Iong |
| 01:14:17 |
WeII, tonight was actuaIIy |
| 01:14:21 |
And aIready in your bedroom. |
| 01:14:23 |
Shabaash, beta. My son is a hound doggie! |
| 01:14:27 |
A chip off the oId BadaIandabads. |
| 01:14:29 |
You got the oId Camford |
| 01:14:32 |
-Beta? |
| 01:14:35 |
PeneIope? |
| 01:14:37 |
My IittIe vixen, I'm ready. |
| 01:14:41 |
Honey bunny? I'm ready. |
| 01:14:45 |
PeneIope, I'm not quite sure |
| 01:14:48 |
Do I get discipIined now? |
| 01:14:52 |
-PROVOST: AbsoIuteIy. |
| 01:14:58 |
You know, beta, I envy you. |
| 01:15:01 |
You are just Iike I was. |
| 01:15:03 |
A chip off the oId BadaIandabads. |
| 01:15:06 |
Attending the big bad bone dance, |
| 01:15:12 |
The pink taco stand |
| 01:15:16 |
free of charge. |
| 01:15:17 |
(EX CLAIMING) |
| 01:15:19 |
Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad, Iisten. |
| 01:15:22 |
No dishum. |
| 01:15:24 |
-No dishum. |
| 01:15:25 |
I am not a chip off the oId BadaIandabad |
| 01:15:30 |
I tried to Iive up to your Iegacy. |
| 01:15:32 |
But I'm afraid I disappointed you. |
| 01:15:34 |
You see, I reaIIy have faIIen for someone, |
| 01:15:40 |
Just one girI? |
| 01:15:42 |
Just one. |
| 01:15:48 |
I see. |
| 01:15:51 |
So, this one girI is feeIing the same |
| 01:15:57 |
I beIieve so. |
| 01:16:02 |
WeII, I guess we are not aII cut out |
| 01:16:09 |
You're not disappointed? |
| 01:16:11 |
How can I be disappointed? You're my son. |
| 01:16:16 |
It is watching you |
| 01:16:18 |
that makes me feeI so proud of you, beta. |
| 01:16:21 |
Come, give your father a big squashy. |
| 01:16:25 |
Thanks. |
| 01:16:28 |
-No, no, Dad, I need another hug. |
| 01:16:30 |
-Oh, beta, I Iove you. |
| 01:16:32 |
Beta, I can't breathe. |
| 01:16:35 |
Beta, I can't breathe. |
| 01:16:36 |
(GROANING) Oh, I Iove you, too. I Iove you. |
| 01:16:39 |
Bye. |
| 01:16:41 |
Sorry, did I ruin a moment? |
| 01:16:43 |
What the heII are you doing here? |
| 01:16:44 |
Provost and I made some |
| 01:16:48 |
StoIen copies of next week's history test |
| 01:16:54 |
My students wouId never cheat. |
| 01:16:56 |
Yes. WeII, you can teII your story |
| 01:16:59 |
first thing in the morning. |
| 01:17:02 |
You know, it's funny |
| 01:17:06 |
I suggest you start packing, Paki. |
| 01:17:12 |
Restraint, my boy. Restraint. |
| 01:17:15 |
-He's mine. |
| 01:17:19 |
Camford University is the greatest |
| 01:17:25 |
We take transgressions most seriousIy. |
| 01:17:28 |
So it is I must inform you |
| 01:17:35 |
I stoIe the exam. |
| 01:17:36 |
-GETHIN: Sir, that's ridicuIous. |
| 01:17:42 |
I don't know the first thing |
| 01:17:44 |
so how couId I have expected my students |
| 01:17:47 |
I admit it was a weak moment. |
| 01:17:51 |
WeII, you understand that this wouId |
| 01:17:57 |
Yes. |
| 01:17:59 |
I onIy ask that you not penaIize |
| 01:18:01 |
for which I'm cIearIy to bIame. |
| 01:18:03 |
They aII have to be expeIIed. |
| 01:18:06 |
I don't see why the entire house |
| 01:18:10 |
for Mr. Ba... |
| 01:18:11 |
(STAMMERING) |
| 01:18:12 |
ALL: BadaIandabad! |
| 01:18:13 |
-Thank you. |
| 01:18:15 |
WeII, for his transgressions. |
| 01:18:17 |
We'II give them an oraI exam. |
| 01:18:21 |
If they pass, they're back in. |
| 01:18:26 |
PIP: Fine. |
| 01:18:27 |
But meanwhiIe, Mr. BadaIandabad, |
| 01:18:37 |
Wait. CharIotte, Iet me expIain. |
| 01:18:39 |
I've heard more than enough, thank you. |
| 01:18:41 |
I cannot beIieve we bought in |
| 01:18:44 |
But... |
| 01:18:45 |
Those kids idoIized you. I admired you. |
| 01:18:49 |
But the joke's on aII of us, isn't it? |
| 01:18:52 |
Look, I didn't mean to hurt anybody, okay? |
| 01:18:54 |
-If you wouId just Iet me expIain... |
| 01:18:55 |
The road to heII is paved |
| 01:18:59 |
Good day, Mr. BadaIandabad. |
| 01:19:03 |
(AFTERMA TH PLAYING) |
| 01:20:08 |
MAN: We aII know why we're here. |
| 01:20:11 |
Let's begin. |
| 01:20:25 |
(WOMAN GROANlNG) |
| 01:20:26 |
Come on, baby. Come on. |
| 01:20:29 |
Daddy's Ieaving soon. |
| 01:20:32 |
Come on. |
| 01:20:34 |
I'm trying to be nice to you. |
| 01:20:37 |
You don't Iike it nice, do you, |
| 01:20:40 |
-Hey, guys. How did it go? |
| 01:20:46 |
WeII, Iook, the important thing |
| 01:20:47 |
WeII, Iook, the important thing |
| 01:20:51 |
You passed? |
| 01:20:52 |
-Oh, you passed. |
| 01:20:55 |
(ALL YELLING) |
| 01:20:58 |
What's wrong, Gethin? |
| 01:21:00 |
Oh, weII, this is aII thanks to you, sir. |
| 01:21:03 |
And as soon as you Ieave tomorrow, |
| 01:21:04 |
we're going to get sIaughtered |
| 01:21:07 |
Oh, pIease, Gethin. |
| 01:21:09 |
This is aII thanks to you guys. |
| 01:21:11 |
You know, I had a feeIing |
| 01:21:14 |
so I prepared some Iibations. |
| 01:21:18 |
Now, you guys were outcasts |
| 01:21:21 |
and you showed those priviIeged |
| 01:21:27 |
And because of your hard work, |
| 01:21:29 |
Camford, one of the finest institutions |
| 01:21:35 |
And it's time you get out there, |
| 01:21:39 |
and win the Hastings Cup. |
| 01:21:42 |
-To the Cock and BuIIs. |
| 01:21:45 |
Oh, come on, this again. |
| 01:21:47 |
-To the Cock and BuIIs! |
| 01:21:52 |
(BELLS TOLLING) |
| 01:22:30 |
Taj MahaI, beta, cheer up a IittIe. |
| 01:22:31 |
You wiII find another schooI |
| 01:22:37 |
Dad, I'm reaIIy, reaIIy sorry |
| 01:22:40 |
I just wanted to foIIow in |
| 01:22:46 |
Did I not teII you about your stories, |
| 01:22:49 |
TeII him. |
| 01:22:53 |
Taj, I may have toId you |
| 01:22:59 |
I'm afraid I was never a member |
| 01:23:03 |
What? |
| 01:23:05 |
But aII those stories? |
| 01:23:09 |
Wait. The ones about being the |
| 01:23:14 |
That wouId be a fine thing. |
| 01:23:17 |
More Iike the suItan of spIat. |
| 01:23:20 |
One must admit, it can be somewhat |
| 01:23:23 |
Hang on. Hang on. |
| 01:23:24 |
Why were you not in |
| 01:23:27 |
I thought I was accepted. |
| 01:23:28 |
But when I arrived, |
| 01:23:32 |
A typographicaI error, they said. |
| 01:23:35 |
You're kidding. |
| 01:23:37 |
It's okay, beta. |
| 01:23:38 |
Maybe this university is not the pIace |
| 01:23:43 |
Come. Let's go home. |
| 01:23:48 |
Can you guys pIease give me |
| 01:23:52 |
Haan, beta. Of course. Chalo. |
| 01:24:05 |
Guess I won't be needing |
| 01:24:07 |
-How fast does that goIf cart go? |
| 01:24:11 |
There's no time. I'II expIain on the way. |
| 01:24:16 |
Welcome everybody to |
| 01:24:22 |
(ALL APPLAUDING) |
| 01:24:30 |
Now, only two teams |
| 01:24:33 |
to compete in the final event. |
| 01:24:36 |
The Fox and Hounds, |
| 01:24:38 |
and the Cock and Bulls. |
| 01:24:41 |
Fox and Hounds, who will represent you? |
| 01:24:45 |
I wiII. |
| 01:24:46 |
Cock and Bulls, who will represent you? |
| 01:24:51 |
I wiII. |
| 01:24:52 |
(PEOPLE GASPING) |
| 01:24:58 |
What are you doing here? |
| 01:25:01 |
I'm afraid Mr. Everett's correct. |
| 01:25:06 |
Provost Cunningham, I think |
| 01:25:08 |
-CharIie, have you Iost your senses? |
| 01:25:11 |
If you Iook cIoseIy at this photo, |
| 01:25:13 |
you'II see that a woman |
| 01:25:16 |
Which means it couIdn't have been Taj. |
| 01:25:22 |
Don't just stand there, young man. |
| 01:25:30 |
Cheers. |
| 01:25:35 |
ALL: Cock and BuIIs! |
| 01:25:38 |
En garde. |
| 01:25:44 |
Point, Fox and Hounds. |
| 01:25:51 |
-Okay, he is good. |
| 01:25:54 |
Every time, he attacks from his Ieft |
| 01:25:56 |
that's when you attack. |
| 01:25:57 |
HeIIo. I'm trying. |
| 01:25:58 |
But his Iightning-fast bIows |
| 01:26:01 |
-Oh, our first fight. |
| 01:26:05 |
(BOTH GRUNTING) |
| 01:26:06 |
(BOTH GRUNTING) |
| 01:26:13 |
PROVOST: Point, Cock and BuIIs. |
| 01:26:22 |
-That was great. Got any more advice? |
| 01:26:29 |
Note taken. |
| 01:26:31 |
You know, I think |
| 01:26:34 |
(CROWD GASPS ) |
| 01:26:36 |
Somebody has some anger issues. |
| 01:26:41 |
Let's settIe this Iike my ancestors did, |
| 01:26:44 |
-You want to expIoit me economicaIIy? |
| 01:26:48 |
-First bIood. |
| 01:26:51 |
Come on, Paki, it's your chance to stick it |
| 01:26:57 |
Pip, stop it. |
| 01:27:02 |
Pip, I hate to pry, |
| 01:27:03 |
but do you think |
| 01:27:06 |
Overcompensation for your shortcomings! |
| 01:27:13 |
VioIence doesn't soIve anything, bitch. |
| 01:27:18 |
(PEOPLE SCREAMING) |
| 01:27:20 |
I'm sorry! |
| 01:27:22 |
No, I'm not. |
| 01:27:24 |
Gethin. |
| 01:27:27 |
Thank you. |
| 01:27:29 |
Oh, shit. |
| 01:27:30 |
I don't think you get it, Raji. |
| 01:27:46 |
If we weren't here, who wouId tend to |
| 01:27:50 |
whiIe you pretend to be important, |
| 01:27:53 |
I'm sure I'd survive, Raji. |
| 01:28:06 |
You are pompous, |
| 01:28:09 |
and dress Iike a dance instructor |
| 01:28:17 |
Looks Iike it's curtains for you, Raji. |
| 01:28:20 |
Good idea, Pip. |
| 01:28:22 |
(PEOPLE SCREAMING) |
| 01:28:26 |
(GROANING) |
| 01:28:31 |
Up and over. |
| 01:28:34 |
Oh, my God. Pip, that was fantastic. |
| 01:28:37 |
WeII, I work out, I train. |
| 01:28:44 |
This is becoming rather tiresome. |
| 01:28:52 |
(WHISPERS ) Go for the Rathbone. |
| 01:28:57 |
The Rathbone. Very impressive. |
| 01:29:01 |
But bad news. I taught it to her. |
| 01:29:06 |
Time to meet your ancestors, Haji. |
| 01:29:09 |
Oh, yeah? |
| 01:29:16 |
No! |
| 01:29:19 |
Father! |
| 01:29:25 |
(PEOPLE EX CLAIMING) |
| 01:29:34 |
And the name is Taj. |
| 01:29:36 |
PROVOST: Point and match, Mr. Ba... |
| 01:29:39 |
(STAMMERING) |
| 01:29:41 |
ALL: BadaIandabad! |
| 01:29:46 |
Somebody pIease get me a Tidy Wipe. |
| 01:29:49 |
CongratuIations, young man. |
| 01:30:00 |
Ladies and gentIemen, |
| 01:30:03 |
Ladies and gentIemen, |
| 01:30:04 |
I give you this year's winners, |
| 01:30:09 |
winners of this year's Hastings Cup. |
| 01:30:16 |
Hooray! |
| 01:30:18 |
Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. |
| 01:30:22 |
Wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. |
| 01:30:25 |
My father donates miIIions of pounds |
| 01:30:30 |
Consider repercussions |
| 01:30:35 |
-TeII him. |
| 01:30:38 |
Pip stoIe the exam papers |
| 01:30:43 |
(PEOPLE GASPING) |
| 01:30:46 |
WeII, perhaps you shouId consider the |
| 01:30:52 |
Yes, he's right. You're expeIIed. |
| 01:31:01 |
Good, I couIdn't stand that IittIe snotbag. |
| 01:31:07 |
Sammy! |
| 01:31:11 |
Sammy! |
| 01:31:17 |
Lord Wrightwood? |
| 01:31:19 |
Yes. |
| 01:31:21 |
(STUTTERING) Pip Everett. EarI of Grey. |
| 01:31:24 |
Mr. Everett, I am... I didn't recognize you. |
| 01:31:28 |
Oh, that's nothing. No. |
| 01:31:29 |
I just wanted to say, |
| 01:31:32 |
and wanted to say thank you |
| 01:31:34 |
Yes. About that, |
| 01:31:39 |
-Mistake? |
| 01:31:42 |
It was meant to say that |
| 01:31:45 |
Sorry, oId boy. |
| 01:31:47 |
(STAMMERING) TypographicaI. |
| 01:31:50 |
What he's trying to say is piss off, Pip. |
| 01:31:53 |
No, okay. Yeah, okay. Sure. Quite. |
| 01:31:59 |
Are you sure typographicaI was... |
| 01:32:03 |
Beta, beta, beta, beta, beta. |
| 01:32:06 |
I've never been more proud of you |
| 01:32:09 |
Thanks, Dad. |
| 01:32:10 |
You know, your son is |
| 01:32:12 |
My son, a hound doggie? |
| 01:32:16 |
It's practicaIIy raining |
| 01:32:18 |
when he waIks down the street. |
| 01:32:19 |
I aIways knew it that my son |
| 01:32:22 |
in the pursuit of the pink taco. |
| 01:32:25 |
Being a hound doggie |
| 01:32:29 |
WeII, it may be in his genes, dear, |
| 01:32:31 |
but I certainIy never found anything |
| 01:32:35 |
Are you saying that I'm firing bIanks? |
| 01:32:38 |
So, what? If our mattress |
| 01:32:41 |
you wouId have fathered six. |
| 01:32:42 |
I am warning you, woman. |
| 01:32:44 |
I am shaking in my sari. |
| 01:32:45 |
I don't need this aggravation. |
| 01:32:47 |
Thanks for deaIing with my dad. |
| 01:32:48 |
-They don't Iive here, do they? |
| 01:32:51 |
My pIeasure, then. |
| 01:32:54 |
You know, CharIotte, |
| 01:32:57 |
I don't own a house or anything. |
| 01:33:00 |
In fact, the onIy titIe I hoId |
| 01:33:03 |
Oh, come now, Mr. BadaIandabad. |
| 01:33:05 |
You're forgetting |
| 01:33:08 |
HardIy, I aImost died up there. |
| 01:33:14 |
-Were you caIIing me a hound doggie? |
| 01:33:18 |
WeII. |
| 01:33:20 |
(SHlNEPLAYING) |
| 01:33:24 |
I can fence much better than you, though. |
| 01:33:26 |
-Oh, reaIIy? |
| 01:33:27 |
-Let's go. |
| 01:33:29 |
Let's go, yes. |
