Veronika Decides To Die

en
00:00:58 Well, let's see.
00:01:01 After you decide that I'm depressed or
00:01:08 And I know, hundreds of people
00:01:10 they're all doing
00:01:16 I go back to work and take
00:01:20 Have dinner with my parents, persuade
00:01:23 and it never gives
00:01:34 Then one day,
00:01:40 He'd be nice enough and that'll
00:01:52 The first year we make
00:01:56 Then the second and third
00:02:01 But, just as we're getting sick
00:02:08 Taking care of kids,
00:02:12 that'll keep us on even keel
00:02:16 And then, ten years into it,
00:02:21 because I'm... too busy
00:02:28 And when I find out...
00:02:30 I'd like to kill him...
00:02:37 We'll get passed it.
00:02:40 In a few years,
00:02:43 And this time, I just pretend
00:02:45 somehow giving in to fast just doesn't
00:02:50 And you know, I'm happy
00:02:53 Sometimes, wishing my kids
00:02:59 Other times... secretly pleased
00:03:09 I'm fine... really.
00:06:54 Green is not the new black.
00:06:56 Hasn't anyone else noticed that
00:07:01 Why is everyone so afraid
00:07:05 Slogans like these have succeeded
00:07:08 all the things that really matter.
00:07:13 I want people to know I believe
00:07:15 this collective madness
00:07:21 This is not the real world.
00:07:25 Goodbye,
00:08:04 Call 911!
00:08:20 Audrey, call 911!
00:09:16 The syringe is going in.
00:09:19 - Pressure is 100 over 60.
00:09:22 Pressure is down
00:09:24 Bring her inside.
00:09:26 Move her
00:10:02 Could you please
00:10:36 Edward!
00:10:54 Come on now, Edward.
00:11:17 I wanted to let you know that your fathers
00:11:27 He will ask then
00:11:34 Have you made any progress, Edward?
00:11:41 You know Villette, works for the great
00:11:48 The last few times your father visited,
00:11:51 but...
00:11:53 well... I'm certain he believes
00:12:03 What'd you think of that, Edward?
00:12:12 Nurse!
00:12:57 Relax. We're gonna take
00:13:05 Take it easy.
00:13:09 Here we are.
00:13:40 Veronika?
00:13:43 You were in coma
00:13:46 before being well enough
00:13:51 Where am I?
00:13:54 Villette.
00:13:57 Villette?
00:14:00 A privately funded psychiatric
00:14:04 Our director, Dr. Blake has taken
00:14:08 You're psychiatrists!
00:14:13 Why am I here?
00:14:17 Your parents approved it.
00:14:21 Veronika, can I ask you
00:14:24 Your date of birth?
00:14:27 December 24, 2000...
00:14:32 Um...
00:14:34 19... 81.
00:14:37 Your address?
00:14:46 Your place of emmployment?
00:14:50 Freeman and Stanley.
00:14:53 Your position?
00:14:57 Assistant Account Executive.
00:15:00 plus additional
00:15:07 The color of your mothers' hair?
00:15:20 I don't remember.
00:15:24 The color of my hair?
00:15:28 Blond.
00:15:31 Are you sure?
00:15:36 "Deklava" is Slovenian?
00:15:42 My parents left
00:15:46 We get along just fine,
00:15:53 Look, how long
00:15:55 Unfortunately...
00:15:58 we have some difficult news...
00:16:05 Somebody wanna tell me
00:16:17 That's yours.
00:16:19 Oh...
00:16:25 We're ready to begin, when you took
00:16:30 And the infarct of a heart attack,
00:16:36 In layman's terms,
00:16:39 that pumps blood into the heart, which
00:16:45 Your heart attack produced a scar,
00:16:50 I'm afraid the aneurysm is so large,
00:16:56 It will get bigger and bigger
00:17:11 So, I'm gonna die after all?
00:17:15 I'm afraid so.
00:17:21 Well, how long do I have?
00:17:27 Exact estimates are impossible.
00:17:34 Okay. So, six months?
00:17:40 It could be any time, um...
00:17:44 It may only be
00:17:50 I have to wait that long?
00:17:54 Well...
00:17:56 If I succeeded,
00:18:01 It might be
00:18:03 Yes.
00:18:05 I think we've said
00:18:10 We think this is
00:18:13 We'll be giving you
00:18:16 which may make you feel
00:18:19 But we'll do everything we can
00:18:23 pleasant as possible.
00:18:27 Do my parents know?
00:18:30 No. Not yet.
00:18:32 Will you tell 'em?
00:18:36 I think we said
00:18:44 Natasha, would you... please?
00:18:47 Yes, doctor.
00:20:45 Eight hundred sixty.
00:20:48 Eight hundred sixty-two.
00:20:51 Eight hundred sixty-four.
00:20:55 There you are!
00:20:57 Better?
00:21:02 I'm your new roommate, Claire.
00:21:20 This place isn't so bad, you know.
00:21:23 They have really good drugs.
00:21:28 I'm leaving any day now.
00:21:30 But not before I have more round
00:21:38 You're really pretty.
00:22:06 I'm gonna tell you a trick
00:22:11 It's a story.
00:22:15 Once, upon a time...
00:22:17 there was a powerful wizard
00:22:22 And to do this...
00:22:23 he poured a magic potion into the well
00:22:28 Everyone who tasted it
00:22:31 And the King... when he saw
00:22:35 he was terrified.
00:22:38 He was preparing
00:22:41 but the Queen stopped him,
00:22:45 "Let us drink from the well,
00:22:51 And so, they drank from
00:22:56 and they were immediately
00:23:02 And so, the King was allowed
00:23:06 the rest of his days.
00:23:13 So...
00:23:16 learn to think like those
00:23:20 and you can pass
00:23:24 You think outsiders
00:23:27 I'm not crazy.
00:23:32 Are you really gonna die?
00:23:36 Who told you that?
00:23:38 Oh, you know,
00:23:41 Blah... blah... talk... talk.
00:23:46 I don't wanna wait.
00:23:50 Do you know how
00:23:55 Really?
00:24:01 Come have a smoke with me.
00:24:04 No thanks.
00:24:05 Oh, come on... get dressed. You don't
00:24:32 Do you wanna go
00:24:48 Ask Mari, she'll tell you
00:24:53 She's been here longest
00:25:00 Her clique
00:25:03 They don't take their medications,
00:25:06 She was a lawyer on the outside,
00:25:10 But when she lost her job, she had
00:25:15 Her marriage is over too.
00:25:18 And she's really close
00:25:20 You think she'll help me?
00:25:23 I don't know.
00:25:25 If she doesn't wanna talk to you,
00:25:43 What about him?
00:25:46 Ed. I know...
00:25:48 He's gorgeous... but you can't
00:25:52 Mari has a way with him,
00:25:58 He was dumped here
00:26:01 Years?
00:26:03 That's what happened.
00:26:06 He was in an accident, and against the
00:26:09 he stopped talking.
00:26:12 His girlfriend was in the car
00:26:17 He thinks he killed her.
00:26:21 What do they say
00:26:22 Oh God, it changes all the time.
00:26:25 Catatony, Schizo,
00:26:28 It's no use getting interested in him,
00:26:34 I'm not interested
00:26:38 Not even me?
00:26:41 I'm freezing.
00:26:48 Hey! Hey, do you know
00:26:53 I use it in my coma treatment. I have the
00:26:56 !I have my last treatments
00:26:58 You can take all you want.
00:27:14 How are you?
00:27:25 Your parents
00:27:28 No!
00:27:33 I can't see them!
00:27:35 I won't see them!
00:27:38 But they want to see you.
00:27:43 Did you tell 'em?
00:27:44 No.
00:27:48 No, you told me not to.
00:27:50 I thought,
00:27:54 How can I tell 'em?
00:28:03 I think you should see them.
00:28:20 Someone please send in,
00:28:36 Veronika always had good grades
00:28:42 Always had good paying jobs.
00:28:45 Never had a speck
00:28:51 She...
00:28:53 You always made us...
00:29:02 Doctor, help to make her
00:29:08 back to normal.
00:29:11 He's a good doctor.
00:29:15 Well...
00:29:20 your daughter tried
00:29:22 now that's nothing for you
00:29:26 In our society, we feel we must
00:29:30 we feel hopeless,
00:29:38 The plan... is to talk
00:29:42 Talk?
00:29:47 We have to go back...
00:29:50 Why would you listen?
00:29:53 Dad, how much you think they are
00:29:55 Oh, it's nothing. Forget it.
00:29:58 The most important thing
00:30:02 Of course it would be better
00:30:05 - and rest with us, but...
00:30:07 being away from everyone,
00:30:11 will help people
00:30:15 This... this place...
00:30:19 I even noticed on the way here,
00:30:27 You play piano?
00:30:28 No.
00:30:29 - Oh yes, Doctor, she...
00:30:34 - Mozart... Bach...
00:30:37 Debussy.
00:30:38 Every teacher said
00:30:41 It doesn't matter, I don't play
00:30:45 Well, she even had a scholarship...
00:30:47 - from the Juilliard.
00:30:49 But we really expected her to go
00:30:53 So, she would never have to... uh,
00:30:57 Could... could we not have
00:31:00 We just want you to be happy.
00:31:02 Could we just not.
00:31:07 I'm sorry.
00:31:08 It's okay, sweetheart.
00:31:15 Sorry.
00:31:22 Veronika.
00:31:27 There's nothing else you want to say,
00:31:40 Are you sure?
00:31:47 Well, it's a long drive
00:31:50 if you want to beat
00:31:56 Yeah, I guess.
00:32:00 Getting back to Brooklyn
00:32:31 Listen.
00:32:36 When Dr. Blake says
00:32:40 you come home.
00:32:43 Then you'll spend
00:33:04 - Thank you.
00:33:06 See you soon.
00:33:53 Is this it?
00:34:05 There she is.
00:34:07 You gave us a startle, young lady.
00:34:16 We're going to try adjusting
00:35:27 We wouldn't even be involved,
00:35:31 But fortunately she didn't, okay?
00:35:37 And jobs like this have always been taken
00:35:42 None of you all
00:35:54 Honey, I'm a fruit-cake.
00:35:59 They're dissing on all the publicity
00:36:03 Well?... Aren't you gonna
00:36:07 No. You won't be with us...
00:36:12 anyhow.
00:36:32 Good thing about being
00:36:34 so you can get away
00:36:36 when he yells something.
00:36:40 - I was looking for you.
00:36:43 Claire said that you might...
00:36:46 Be somebody who can help you?
00:36:49 I need pills.
00:36:53 I wanna die on my own terms.
00:37:04 When those two geniuses changing
00:37:07 at dinner time, around 7...
00:37:10 that's when you come over
00:37:14 I don't understand.
00:37:18 The medicine closet.
00:38:19 How can you stand it here?
00:38:22 Edward!
00:38:28 Edward!
00:38:35 Edward, come on.
00:38:39 Come on.
00:38:42 Come on.
00:38:48 Edward, come on.
00:38:57 Dinnertime.
00:39:00 Dinnertime.
00:39:02 Come on, let's go.
00:39:19 George, this way.
00:39:52 Veronika! Get outta there!
00:39:54 Spit it out, spit it out, spit it out.
00:39:57 Come on! Spit it out!
00:39:59 Come on. All of it!
00:40:02 Is that all? Let me see.
00:40:07 Come on, look at me.
00:40:10 Let's get her to Dr. Blake.
00:40:20 So you really thought, it would be
00:40:24 You're shit.
00:40:26 Because I won't cooperate
00:40:29 Because you love playing
00:40:34 I hate you.
00:40:36 Really?
00:40:42 Fine. I hate your stupid desk...
00:40:47 and I hate your ugly tie.
00:40:49 And I hate your
00:40:52 And I hate everyone locked up in
00:40:56 for spending their very last penny
00:40:59 God forbid, they should ever
00:41:03 Is that what they come here for?
00:41:08 And I hate the jerks
00:41:10 the money they earn
00:41:12 And more than anything,
00:41:15 who have forgotten
00:41:17 or the fact that
00:41:24 I have some
00:41:29 Don't really much care
00:41:33 You sound like you might be
00:41:38 Answer me honestly, please.
00:41:41 Does't it feel better,
00:41:48 Have you ever heard the story
00:41:53 You mean...
00:41:56 Do you think she invented it?
00:42:00 Oh, I should've
00:42:03 That's your brilliant take
00:42:07 Well...
00:42:08 reality is what the majority
00:42:11 Not necessarily the best,
00:42:13 but the one that has become adopted
00:42:17 Some things are governed by
00:42:21 until more and more people believe
00:42:24 Like the QWERTY keyboard. Do you know...
00:42:28 Haven't really had time
00:42:30 Well...
00:42:31 when the typewriter
00:42:34 the letters were arranged
00:42:37 Now, when a person typed
00:42:41 So this man... uh, Scholes,
00:42:45 whereby people were obliged
00:42:52 And?
00:42:54 Well, it's...
00:42:57 it's a true story.
00:43:00 You're a bat-shit crazy,
00:43:03 You sell those patients
00:43:05 that they're no differend
00:43:08 because they're
00:43:11 Well, I consider that a simple matter
00:43:14 would call it reassuring,
00:43:18 Besides... aren't you the one
00:43:23 of posting pathological and
00:43:29 Well, I was high
00:43:33 Then I take it,
00:43:35 was not the real reason
00:43:40 I had a point.
00:43:42 You almost laughed.
00:43:45 Another sign of improvement.
00:43:48 Go to hell!
00:48:36 She's beginning to expierince
00:48:38 is something
00:48:41 Edward's noticed her.
00:48:45 Whatever that means
00:48:48 Have you grown so attached to your guild
00:48:51 you can't see yourself
00:48:55 Since you are so close to leaving,
00:48:57 a happy ending for Edward
00:49:01 I don't think Edward being
00:49:04 with a few days to live,
00:49:07 Perhabs they are
00:49:09 You mean countertransference?
00:49:11 Just because it's a cliche,
00:49:17 Anyway...
00:49:29 In order to lose someone,
00:49:33 authentic attachment.
00:49:37 Now if Edward could recover normal
00:49:40 of general loss, I think I use that
00:50:26 You're free to go.
00:51:50 Yeah, a mystery.
00:51:55 Okay Claire,
00:52:01 Here we go.
00:52:03 - It's 100 over 80.
00:52:10 - The numbers are all good.
00:52:13 Okay, stay still.
00:52:23 Goodbye.
00:52:27 100 over 80.
00:52:50 One of your patients,
00:52:53 is getting considering
00:52:55 from some rather unfair things she said
00:53:01 Of course our first and...
00:53:04 for the wellbeing
00:53:07 Well, now, she is a patient
00:53:09 and the details of her condition
00:53:13 But she is recoverd enough for a...
00:53:17 Look...
00:53:18 you want to put Veronika in
00:53:22 that's not going to happen.
00:53:24 We're under a great deal
00:53:27 as I'm sure you understand.
00:53:29 I'm sorry, she's not available
00:53:35 We did some inquiries.
00:53:37 The State Board Health,
00:53:44 Apparently three years ago
00:53:48 of a drug overdose?
00:53:50 And the families of other patients
00:53:54 irregular methods of treatment.
00:53:58 What the families of patients
00:54:00 is that not every mentally ill
00:54:05 Now, what is it exactly
00:54:08 You have very...
00:54:13 I can shine a spot-light...
00:54:15 on the unusual activity
00:54:21 I have absolutely
00:54:38 Two hundred and seventy-four,
00:54:42 Two hundred and seventy-six,
00:54:45 Two hundred and seventy-eight,
00:54:48 Two hundred and eighty,
00:54:52 Two hundred and eighty-two,
00:54:55 Hey, Claire, honey, come on.
00:55:00 Okay, get your bags,
00:55:08 Okay, I'll go get Dr. Thompson.
00:55:18 No, not now, Edward.
00:55:22 I... I don't feel
00:56:05 You okay?
00:56:10 I'll get to the moon next time,
00:58:00 Are you OK?
00:58:03 It doesn't really matter,
00:58:10 Hey, there is an expert in Sufi spiritual
00:58:14 Some people say Sufi spirituality
00:58:20 I'm one.
00:58:29 ~Maybe you should take the time to
01:00:00 Ooohmm...
01:00:11 Insanity... is the inability
01:00:18 So, all of us...
01:00:23 But don't confuse insanity
01:00:26 You have two choices:
01:00:29 To control your mind
01:02:58 And allow the real "I"...
01:03:01 to revealed... itself.
01:03:10 not what others...
01:06:54 I...
01:06:57 I could fall in love with you,
01:07:05 And you can see me
01:07:11 But that's okay.
01:08:37 It's very early.
01:08:40 I need to talk you.
01:08:42 I need your help.
01:08:45 You didn't have your injection
01:08:49 I know.
01:08:55 Well, you don't look it.
01:09:00 If you want to make the most of the time
01:09:10 I don't want to.
01:09:13 And that's why I need to know exactly
01:09:20 I told you
01:09:22 Everything is happening
01:09:28 Dr. Blake, I need you
01:09:33 I need a shot or something
01:09:37 I want to be conscious
01:09:42 What's the other thing?
01:09:46 I wanna leave here.
01:09:49 No... I don't know...
01:09:52 You can't just go. You're not well enough.
01:09:59 You're looking very pale.
01:10:01 I'm tired, that's all.
01:10:04 Look, if I have even a little time left,
01:10:10 I wanna go to the beach. I wanna see
01:10:15 I wanna have a huge taco
01:10:20 I wanna walk into an Irish pub
01:10:23 I've never done that.
01:10:26 I wanna see my mom, I wanna
01:10:31 Look, get some rest and conserve
01:10:44 Dr. Blake there's...
01:10:50 Last night...
01:10:53 I knew I had to live.
01:10:57 There's so much about myself
01:11:04 When desire comes, that's fear.
01:11:07 These days, most people replaced
01:11:13 And everyone has dreams, but only
01:11:18 makes cowards of the rest of us.
01:11:23 Even if they feel their right?
01:11:26 Particularly then.
01:11:34 Veronika, go get some rest.
01:11:44 If everyone would relise their dreams,
01:12:12 Ha...
01:12:16 The Martians just send me a message
01:12:19 we must go forward and bring peace
01:12:25 You think I'm making this up?
01:12:28 You can hear their words as plain,
01:12:55 I recall you're telling me
01:12:58 even if they feel anything.
01:13:02 "Positive Compation".
01:13:05 All that textbook stuff is
01:13:09 Maybe it's time for you
01:13:11 Oh, don't be silly.
01:13:12 I do actually help people here,
01:13:15 Helping people?
01:13:20 Edward's benefiting, isn't he?
01:13:22 Yes, but to get that benefit
01:13:26 making her recover her will to live
01:13:30 All in the name of research?
01:13:34 Well, it's not a perfect science.
01:13:37 Perhabs with everyone seams to me
01:13:44 And when will you finally drop those
01:13:47 you never really believed in
01:13:52 Or are you still a lawyer at heart
01:13:59 Look, if Veronika can help Edward
01:14:03 he's helping her, through love...
01:14:05 then her life and dead would
01:14:09 My god! Is that the only
01:14:15 Anyway... I made
01:14:19 I found a nice legal-aid office
01:14:23 No Billionare Corporate clients.
01:14:27 without a pot to piss in.
01:14:30 Down the block is a decent takeout deli,
01:14:36 Who knows? Maybe I'll... call up
01:14:43 Well, it sounds all very normal.
01:14:45 It's time I got away from you.
01:14:50 I mean... from here.
01:14:54 That's like I been saying,
01:15:03 This is my office address.
01:15:05 I stay with my sister
01:15:10 I get you the number
01:15:13 Thank you.
01:15:15 You can come sit with me
01:15:20 If my schedule let's up, maybe.
01:15:24 You can't hide here
01:15:58 Yeah?
01:16:01 Hey.
01:16:05 Want some help?
01:16:07 You can put
01:16:10 - Okay.
01:16:20 You know,
01:16:23 playing the piano in a way
01:16:27 And I that you played
01:16:30 because you know
01:16:33 I thought... when I'm gonna die,
01:16:41 I lost it...
01:16:44 to my husband and a job
01:16:46 and I never had the courage
01:16:52 And now today,
01:16:59 I wasn't myself last night.
01:17:04 Only maybe,
01:17:08 Nothing makes
01:17:13 Some people go their whole lives,
01:17:16 like the one you had...
01:17:21 You got a thousand in you.
01:18:39 - Sorry, I...
01:18:40 it's time
01:18:42 You two can see each other later in
01:18:48 Come on.
01:18:50 Come on.
01:19:46 I need to leave Villette.
01:19:53 Were you talking?
01:19:58 I wanna leave.
01:20:06 Assistance, please. Northeast corridor.
01:20:26 It's okay Ed,
01:20:30 Hey Eddie,
01:20:33 I need to talk to Dr. Blake.
01:20:36 Wow! You're talking up
01:20:39 I wanna go.
01:20:40 Why don't you take a few of these,
01:20:42 Go here something very
01:20:45 Don't touch me.
01:20:46 - Where's Blake?
01:20:49 Dr. Thompson, you need to get here
01:20:52 You're just having a little crisis.
01:20:54 - Whoa! What's going on?
01:20:58 Edward, that's wonderful!
01:21:05 Everybody, just calm down.
01:21:08 Relax!
01:21:11 - Veronika!
01:21:13 - Veronika!
01:21:15 Get back, leave him alone.
01:21:20 You just spoke.
01:21:27 I believe that you just started
01:21:32 - Ed, you need to come with me.
01:21:36 You need to go find Blake.
01:21:37 We do the treatment
01:21:44 Wait!
01:21:46 I'm coming with you.
01:21:49 - I'm going with him.
01:21:53 Go back to your rooms now.
01:23:38 Hey.
01:23:57 Hey.
01:24:04 Are you back, huh?
01:24:14 You don't remember, do you?
01:24:36 Veronika.
01:28:08 How you feel?
01:28:11 Like I could live forever.
01:32:49 It's like you're a part of me now,
01:32:56 You better
01:33:04 It's too cold for you
01:33:06 No, I like to see the sunrise.
01:33:10 Okay?
01:33:30 If you close the door...
01:33:34 the night
01:33:38 And no sun shining in.
01:33:42 and say hello to never.
01:33:45 All the people are dancing
01:33:49 I wish it would happen to me.
01:33:53 If you close the door...
01:33:58 the night
01:34:01 I'll get the wine...
01:34:05 we shall toast to never.
01:34:09 But, some times, I know.
01:34:11 Your eyes,
01:34:16 You're a very special girl.
01:34:19 But if you close the door...
01:34:24 I'll never have to see
01:34:34 Veronika?
01:34:37 Veronika?
01:34:41 No!
01:34:57 Dr. Thompson.
01:35:03 This office and Villette
01:35:12 I hope you will conduct yourself wisely,
01:35:20 I want to bring you up to speed with
01:35:36 In a few more days,
01:35:40 that our injections
01:35:43 But in light of her unscheduled
01:35:47 my telling her a perticulare lie
01:35:54 The majority of people
01:35:57 repeat that attempt
01:36:02 I took a risk in lying to her
01:36:05 I decided to test the only remedy
01:36:14 Awareness of life.
01:36:19 Hey, look.
01:36:22 We made it.
01:36:30 We did.
01:36:32 Until she finds out from some doctor
01:36:36 She'll consider each day
01:36:40 Which, in my view, it is.