|
Wake Up Ron Burgundy The Lost Movie
|
| 00:00:07 |
Narrator: There are stories, |
| 00:00:10 |
that are forever lost |
| 00:00:13 |
forgotten or changed |
| 00:00:17 |
who can hear only the whispers |
| 00:00:19 |
Right there, Scottie. |
| 00:00:24 |
Narrator: Still, other tales |
| 00:00:27 |
for future generations |
| 00:00:31 |
But other stories |
| 00:00:33 |
because they don't test well |
| 00:00:37 |
or because a movie |
| 00:00:39 |
and the story |
| 00:00:41 |
This is one of those tales. |
| 00:00:45 |
This is the chaff |
| 00:00:47 |
the skim from the milk... |
| 00:00:50 |
the pudding from |
| 00:00:53 |
and the surgeon guy |
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This is the lost movie |
| 00:01:01 |
''Wake Up, Ron Burgundy.'' |
| 00:01:08 |
Don't worry, San Diego, |
| 00:01:17 |
Hey, Ron Burgundy! |
| 00:01:19 |
- You're the best! |
| 00:01:22 |
I just met Ron Burgundy, |
| 00:01:25 |
Hey, Ron Burgundy! |
| 00:01:27 |
You should do story about me. |
| 00:01:29 |
You're a riot, Mikos. |
| 00:01:35 |
Hey, Ron. Bottoms up! |
| 00:01:37 |
Well, hello, booze. |
| 00:01:44 |
Peace, brother. |
| 00:01:48 |
Hey, I like that fanny. |
| 00:01:50 |
Oh, Mr. Burgundy. |
| 00:01:52 |
I'm Sue, I'm in the book. |
| 00:01:56 |
Narrator: Ron Burgundy |
| 00:01:59 |
as an anchorman. |
| 00:02:01 |
I got you, old glory. |
| 00:02:03 |
Walking tall |
| 00:02:05 |
with his beloved |
| 00:02:07 |
Wait a minute, |
| 00:02:11 |
Narrator: The city of San Diego |
| 00:02:13 |
now had a king and a queen, |
| 00:02:16 |
and they ruled with a mighty, |
| 00:02:18 |
and sometimes sexy hand. |
| 00:02:23 |
Veronica, however, |
| 00:02:25 |
for a National Excellence |
| 00:02:29 |
and was out of town. |
| 00:02:30 |
For one night only, |
| 00:02:34 |
So, Champ, did you |
| 00:02:36 |
Oh, no. Last night-- |
| 00:02:39 |
Oh, I stayed home for a while, |
| 00:02:42 |
pissed my pants, |
| 00:02:46 |
and shot some stray dogs. |
| 00:02:48 |
You know, pretty much |
| 00:02:51 |
Hey, you guys... |
| 00:02:54 |
- ''Because.'' |
| 00:02:57 |
- Because. Because. |
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All righty, news team, whose drink |
| 00:03:03 |
Helen, I'll have a Beefeater |
| 00:03:10 |
Ron, oh... |
| 00:03:11 |
I know. |
| 00:03:13 |
I know I'm bad. |
| 00:03:19 |
I know, it's silly. |
| 00:03:21 |
All right, gang, it's almost 6:00. |
| 00:03:29 |
Da, da, da. |
| 00:03:31 |
Unique New York. |
| 00:03:36 |
Unique New York. |
| 00:03:41 |
A tarantula enjoys |
| 00:03:45 |
Ron: |
| 00:03:46 |
Snoopy was stabbed by a spear. |
| 00:03:50 |
The Human Torch |
| 00:03:54 |
The arsonist has |
| 00:03:57 |
The arsonist. The arsonist. |
| 00:03:59 |
Cue it. |
| 00:04:01 |
Ready, Phil. |
| 00:04:11 |
We're on in five, four... |
| 00:04:18 |
Announcer: |
| 00:04:23 |
Good evening. I'm Ron Burgundy, |
| 00:04:27 |
and this is what's happening |
| 00:04:29 |
An international coalition |
| 00:04:32 |
has banded together |
| 00:04:35 |
the mystery of the Bigfoot |
| 00:04:37 |
once and for all. |
| 00:04:39 |
The conference held |
| 00:04:41 |
included some of the top scientists |
| 00:04:44 |
Ron Burgundy. |
| 00:04:48 |
If I were only |
| 00:04:51 |
By that I mean |
| 00:04:54 |
...with some interesting new |
| 00:04:57 |
out of Washington, |
| 00:05:00 |
with a report |
| 00:05:02 |
Tonight, I conclude |
| 00:05:04 |
on the evils of breast-feeding. |
| 00:05:06 |
So remember, let's leave |
| 00:05:10 |
Well, it looks like it's gonna be |
| 00:05:14 |
Here to tell us all about it is |
| 00:05:17 |
Now, it got all the way up to 97° |
| 00:05:20 |
in some of the outlying areas today, |
| 00:05:23 |
is really, really hot. |
| 00:05:25 |
And I always make |
| 00:05:27 |
every year at this time. |
| 00:05:30 |
and you're going to leave them |
| 00:05:34 |
make sure they have |
| 00:05:36 |
and be sure to roll up the window, |
| 00:05:39 |
Lots going on |
| 00:05:42 |
Champ Kind is gonna let us know |
| 00:05:44 |
Big night tonight for the Padres |
| 00:05:46 |
finishing up a three-game |
| 00:05:49 |
They lost the game 4-2. |
| 00:05:50 |
Here's the pitch, |
| 00:05:52 |
and what happens? |
| 00:05:55 |
And... whammy! |
| 00:05:57 |
Dave Winfield takes |
| 00:05:59 |
Box seven, |
| 00:06:01 |
From here at Channel 4 News, |
| 00:06:05 |
There was a special addition today |
| 00:06:08 |
as Linda the giraffe gave birth |
| 00:06:10 |
to a 42 lb. baby boy. |
| 00:06:13 |
Officials at the zoo |
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will be named Freedom. |
| 00:06:17 |
Looks like the Clippers |
| 00:06:21 |
- Man, that's hilarious. |
| 00:06:24 |
For all of us here |
| 00:06:27 |
I'm Ron Burgundy. |
| 00:06:33 |
All clear. |
| 00:06:35 |
Ed: |
| 00:06:38 |
You're my boy. |
| 00:06:39 |
Hey, Ron, |
| 00:06:41 |
over at Channel 2 News, |
| 00:06:44 |
Every anchor in town |
| 00:06:46 |
Well, I think it's time |
| 00:06:49 |
what a number-one-rated |
| 00:06:54 |
News team! |
| 00:07:08 |
Narrator: And with Veronica gone, |
| 00:07:11 |
it was time to do one thing-- |
| 00:07:13 |
socialize... hard. |
| 00:07:19 |
I couldn't do that. |
| 00:07:21 |
I couldn't do that. |
| 00:07:23 |
- Woo! |
| 00:07:25 |
- do you know what chlamydia is? |
| 00:07:28 |
- Hey, Ron. |
| 00:07:30 |
Oh, not so good. |
| 00:07:33 |
Listen, I don't have time. |
| 00:07:35 |
I think you are now. |
| 00:07:37 |
Well, hello, Pete. |
| 00:07:41 |
Konnichiwa. |
| 00:07:43 |
- Cannonball! |
| 00:07:48 |
Orgy! |
| 00:07:58 |
Sorry, I misread the vibe. |
| 00:08:01 |
Just go back |
| 00:08:03 |
Narrator: But even in the midst |
| 00:08:06 |
trouble can step forward and say, |
| 00:08:09 |
Everybody get down! |
| 00:08:11 |
This is a robbery! |
| 00:08:17 |
- It all begins today! |
| 00:08:21 |
Shoot, I'm havin' a good time! |
| 00:08:24 |
It's a revolutionary |
| 00:08:26 |
We're taking it all back. |
| 00:08:28 |
Y'all better wake up, |
| 00:08:31 |
Ding-a-ling-a-ding-ding-dong! |
| 00:08:34 |
You've got a real reason |
| 00:08:36 |
Hurry up! |
| 00:08:40 |
We are liberating this money |
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and the people of this city |
| 00:08:51 |
We are The Alarm Clock! |
| 00:09:01 |
Oh, that was one crazy party. |
| 00:09:04 |
I feel awful. |
| 00:09:06 |
I had about 70 beers. |
| 00:09:08 |
I mean, literally. |
| 00:09:10 |
I ate a whole bunch |
| 00:09:13 |
It wasn't cotton candy |
| 00:09:16 |
My stomach's itchy. |
| 00:09:18 |
I woke up this morning, |
| 00:09:21 |
and I shit a squirrel. |
| 00:09:23 |
The hell of it is, |
| 00:09:26 |
So now I got |
| 00:09:29 |
down there in my office, |
| 00:09:32 |
You should name him Shawn. |
| 00:09:35 |
Garth: All right, guys, |
| 00:09:37 |
Morning, everyone. |
| 00:09:39 |
Here are the stories |
| 00:09:43 |
The radical protest group |
| 00:09:46 |
robbed their third bank |
| 00:09:49 |
Let's keep on top of this story. |
| 00:09:52 |
the network |
| 00:09:54 |
Narrator: Veronica had gone straight |
| 00:09:57 |
- Hello. |
| 00:09:59 |
out of his chest when he saw |
| 00:10:03 |
Oh, Ron, |
| 00:10:07 |
Take me. Take me right now |
| 00:10:10 |
It's jazz. It's jazz, baby! |
| 00:10:16 |
Ron, control yourself! |
| 00:10:18 |
Not-not with the lights on! |
| 00:10:20 |
Ron: |
| 00:10:22 |
Veronica: |
| 00:10:26 |
Ron: |
| 00:10:29 |
He's like |
| 00:10:31 |
Put it back in! |
| 00:10:33 |
No, no, he didn't mean that! |
| 00:10:50 |
- Look at this. |
| 00:10:52 |
Must be 20 Gs here, |
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plenty of money |
| 00:10:56 |
We got enough bread |
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get people riotous |
| 00:11:01 |
Know what we should |
| 00:11:03 |
I think we should buy |
| 00:11:06 |
What about the revolution? |
| 00:11:08 |
Our mission... |
| 00:11:10 |
is clearly stated |
| 00:11:12 |
Where the hell is |
| 00:11:15 |
I am writing the manifesto. |
| 00:11:17 |
I'm beginning to start |
| 00:11:20 |
You wanna know |
| 00:11:22 |
Yeah, we wanna know. |
| 00:11:26 |
Narrator: |
| 00:11:28 |
For months, Paul had put off |
| 00:11:32 |
by smoking skunkweed |
| 00:11:35 |
But now it was time |
| 00:11:37 |
or lose his hold on this band |
| 00:11:41 |
The TV! That's right! |
| 00:11:44 |
The TV! |
| 00:11:46 |
This... this propaganda box, |
| 00:11:50 |
if we don't control |
| 00:11:54 |
the man... will always |
| 00:11:57 |
and the minds-- |
| 00:11:59 |
Just look at some |
| 00:12:05 |
Oh, hello. |
| 00:12:06 |
I'm beloved anchor |
| 00:12:09 |
You know, lately I'm hearing |
| 00:12:12 |
smoking pot, or marijuana-- |
| 00:12:15 |
Hey, what's the deal with that? |
| 00:12:18 |
What happened to just getting high |
| 00:12:22 |
Maybe enjoying life |
| 00:12:25 |
or sitting underneath a waterfall, |
| 00:12:27 |
enjoying a big glass of Scotch, |
| 00:12:29 |
or enjoying a pack of cigarettes |
| 00:12:33 |
What happened to those |
| 00:12:35 |
Did they die with the dinosaurs |
| 00:12:38 |
In my book, they didn't. |
| 00:12:41 |
And there's only one book-- |
| 00:12:43 |
that's the Bible. |
| 00:12:45 |
So, give it a read |
| 00:12:48 |
Hey, last time I checked, |
| 00:12:52 |
Hey, good night. |
| 00:12:53 |
The following has been |
| 00:12:56 |
Listen to this shit! |
| 00:12:58 |
That Ron Burgundy is the devil. |
| 00:13:00 |
We gotta take back |
| 00:13:02 |
Yo, I'm telling you, Ron Burgundy |
| 00:13:05 |
But he sure is handsome. |
| 00:13:10 |
Frame up two. |
| 00:13:13 |
Give me a tighter one on two. |
| 00:13:14 |
Good evening, |
| 00:13:16 |
Here's what's going on |
| 00:13:19 |
The group |
| 00:13:21 |
who call themselves |
| 00:13:24 |
have struck yet again. |
| 00:13:26 |
Let's go to Brian Fantana |
| 00:13:28 |
with a Channel 4 News exclusive. |
| 00:13:32 |
Police are still baffled by this string |
| 00:13:36 |
They have little evidence, |
| 00:13:38 |
- All they can do now is sit and wait-- |
| 00:13:41 |
Smells like a biker threw up |
| 00:13:45 |
Hey, jag-off, why don't you |
| 00:13:50 |
Back to you, Ron. |
| 00:13:52 |
Which proves yet again |
| 00:13:55 |
and his pet |
| 00:13:57 |
can find true happiness |
| 00:14:04 |
Let me take a moment here... |
| 00:14:06 |
just to collect... |
| 00:14:11 |
A story like that makes this job |
| 00:14:19 |
A lot of emotion right now. |
| 00:14:21 |
A lot of emotion. |
| 00:14:26 |
Well... |
| 00:14:28 |
that's gonna do it |
| 00:14:31 |
God, I'm still shook up. |
| 00:14:33 |
Still shook up. |
| 00:14:35 |
That's gonna do it |
| 00:14:38 |
I'm Ron Burgundy. |
| 00:14:51 |
What's that? |
| 00:14:53 |
Just a little song I heard, |
| 00:14:56 |
that I happen to be |
| 00:15:20 |
Ron, it's making me very nervous |
| 00:15:24 |
Don't worry. |
| 00:15:26 |
I know these streets |
| 00:15:33 |
Mr. Burgundy, please, |
| 00:15:36 |
Woman: ...gonna get killed... |
| 00:15:40 |
'Cause it's really |
| 00:15:42 |
This is a Pontiac Catalina, |
| 00:15:44 |
It really handles well |
| 00:15:47 |
Mr. Burgundy, please, |
| 00:15:52 |
Hold on. |
| 00:15:54 |
You have captivating eyes, |
| 00:15:58 |
like a... |
| 00:16:03 |
Has anyone ever told you that? |
| 00:16:06 |
No. Thank you. |
| 00:16:10 |
I've never crashed... |
| 00:16:12 |
this month. |
| 00:16:16 |
There's a Spanish family |
| 00:16:18 |
- No, I know, the Rodriguez family. |
| 00:16:22 |
Do you like Thai food? |
| 00:16:24 |
You should look |
| 00:16:30 |
And if you're looking |
| 00:16:34 |
that place is not bad. |
| 00:16:41 |
Oh my God. |
| 00:16:45 |
How do you do that? |
| 00:16:48 |
It's okay, we're almost there. |
| 00:16:52 |
Ron: |
| 00:17:08 |
- There you have it. |
| 00:17:14 |
Oh my... |
| 00:17:15 |
what a beautiful view, |
| 00:17:18 |
I know. |
| 00:17:20 |
It always takes my breath away. |
| 00:17:25 |
Over there is |
| 00:17:27 |
It's on the highest point |
| 00:17:30 |
I've always had a dream |
| 00:17:34 |
Bouncing a telecast |
| 00:17:36 |
off the planets and the stars, |
| 00:17:40 |
and onto Jupiter's arrow. |
| 00:17:46 |
Broadcasting... |
| 00:17:49 |
with the gods, I like to call it. |
| 00:17:52 |
Reaching people |
| 00:17:57 |
So, is this where |
| 00:17:59 |
when he's tired of being |
| 00:18:02 |
You are a firecracker. |
| 00:18:12 |
Ron: How is everyone tonight? |
| 00:18:14 |
So, here it is. |
| 00:18:17 |
My little sanctuary, Tino's. |
| 00:18:19 |
- Like I said, it's not much-- |
| 00:18:23 |
- it's quite charming and colorful. |
| 00:18:26 |
- Mr. Burgundy... |
| 00:18:28 |
because of the story you did |
| 00:18:32 |
- we had heat for Christmas. |
| 00:18:35 |
Tuesday night, I was wearing |
| 00:18:38 |
are you Paula Tran? |
| 00:18:40 |
You are a national treasure, |
| 00:18:43 |
Well, thank you. We'll try to get you |
| 00:18:47 |
Take care. |
| 00:18:49 |
Oh, this city really |
| 00:18:52 |
Well, it's like having |
| 00:18:54 |
7% of which are |
| 00:18:57 |
Narrator: Meanwhile, as Ron |
| 00:19:00 |
the team found themselves |
| 00:19:04 |
and confused. |
| 00:19:09 |
I saw the funniest thing |
| 00:19:12 |
it was just popping around |
| 00:19:15 |
I would hit it with my hand, |
| 00:19:18 |
You guys would have loved it. |
| 00:19:26 |
Let's do something. |
| 00:19:28 |
Hey, I got an idea. |
| 00:19:31 |
Let's tear up the Channel 9 |
| 00:19:34 |
Whammy? Huh? |
| 00:19:39 |
Eh, why the hell not? |
| 00:19:55 |
Hell's bells, not again! |
| 00:19:57 |
You sons of bitches! |
| 00:20:01 |
I'm getting tired of it. |
| 00:20:04 |
I miss Ron. |
| 00:20:11 |
You know, I have an admission |
| 00:20:14 |
When we first met, I-- I-- |
| 00:20:16 |
thought that you were just like |
| 00:20:19 |
But... you're not. |
| 00:20:21 |
God, I was |
| 00:20:25 |
I kept wishing there was |
| 00:20:31 |
It's ridiculous |
| 00:20:40 |
What about you, Veronica? |
| 00:20:42 |
What are your hopes? |
| 00:20:47 |
- What are your passions? |
| 00:20:50 |
believe it or not, |
| 00:20:55 |
I, too, want to be |
| 00:20:58 |
Oh boy! |
| 00:21:00 |
And I'd like to be |
| 00:21:03 |
Seriously, you sound like |
| 00:21:05 |
No, I'm very serious, |
| 00:21:08 |
You see, I've always been... |
| 00:21:10 |
cursed with a talent for pursuits usually |
| 00:21:15 |
When I was a little girl, |
| 00:21:18 |
I would play drill sergeant |
| 00:21:21 |
Later on in high school, instead |
| 00:21:25 |
I was president |
| 00:21:29 |
One morning, I read |
| 00:21:33 |
just the sound of my voice... |
| 00:21:38 |
so powerful, |
| 00:21:39 |
commanding |
| 00:21:42 |
grabbing their attention, |
| 00:21:45 |
I knew I had |
| 00:21:48 |
and that was to be |
| 00:21:53 |
Yes, the road has been lonely, |
| 00:21:56 |
difficult... |
| 00:21:58 |
and lonely. |
| 00:22:02 |
You are electric. |
| 00:22:09 |
Now, Ron, |
| 00:22:12 |
sounds to me like you |
| 00:22:15 |
Just take some caution |
| 00:22:17 |
you're really making a lot of us |
| 00:22:21 |
Well, this morning... |
| 00:22:25 |
when I woke up... |
| 00:22:27 |
and I saw Veronica |
| 00:22:29 |
for a split second... |
| 00:22:33 |
I actually cared about someone |
| 00:22:37 |
That doesn't make any sense! |
| 00:22:39 |
You're you, |
| 00:22:42 |
You care about her? |
| 00:22:46 |
Well, if love is a form of madness, |
| 00:22:50 |
and throw away the key. |
| 00:22:58 |
Ron: Hey, gang! |
| 00:23:01 |
Papa's home! |
| 00:23:04 |
Oh, honey, I am so glad |
| 00:23:08 |
My alabaster doll, |
| 00:23:12 |
Gentlemen, |
| 00:23:14 |
you look great. |
| 00:23:21 |
Oh, darling, oh! |
| 00:23:24 |
I've spent all day cleaning your Emmys and |
| 00:23:28 |
Oh, let's make whoopee. |
| 00:23:32 |
- Oh, yes! |
| 00:23:35 |
I'm bad! I need to go |
| 00:23:37 |
I love my life! |
| 00:23:39 |
You take that back |
| 00:23:41 |
Or you tell me right now that |
| 00:23:45 |
or witchcraft or you |
| 00:23:47 |
- That's crazy! |
| 00:23:50 |
Veronamaca now? |
| 00:23:52 |
She's off to go do |
| 00:23:54 |
The Feline Fashion Show. |
| 00:23:56 |
I hope she can handle it. |
| 00:23:59 |
( applause ) |
| 00:24:00 |
Oh, next we have |
| 00:24:03 |
the bride and the pirate. |
| 00:24:05 |
Yes, it's time for a pirate wedding, |
| 00:24:07 |
enacted by cats. |
| 00:24:11 |
Emcee: And now here's |
| 00:24:16 |
All right, let's just do |
| 00:24:19 |
Hello, my name is Paul. |
| 00:24:21 |
Um, this is so cool, |
| 00:24:23 |
Maybe we can get an Orange Julius later |
| 00:24:26 |
Look, sir, I'm about to broadcast, |
| 00:24:29 |
I noticed the cables. |
| 00:24:31 |
- ( sighs ) |
| 00:24:34 |
If anybody gets a van like that, |
| 00:24:37 |
Sir, we're about to go live |
| 00:24:39 |
- You're gonna have to move off-camera. |
| 00:24:42 |
You've got to let the truth ring out, |
| 00:24:45 |
in this city of lies. How about |
| 00:24:47 |
Get the hell away from me |
| 00:24:49 |
And we're on in three... |
| 00:24:53 |
It was quite a show down here |
| 00:24:56 |
And just for today, |
| 00:25:00 |
It made him look ''purr-fect.'' |
| 00:25:03 |
From the Pet Shack in Fulton, |
| 00:25:06 |
for Channel 4 News. |
| 00:25:08 |
Nice little story. |
| 00:25:10 |
That, of course, |
| 00:25:12 |
I'd also like to share with you |
| 00:25:15 |
And I have to tell you, she's quite |
| 00:25:19 |
She did this one thing |
| 00:25:21 |
that involved a hula-hoop |
| 00:25:24 |
- and an ice cream scooper. |
| 00:25:27 |
What? Well, that's going to do |
| 00:25:30 |
For the Channel 4 News team, |
| 00:25:33 |
You stay classy, |
| 00:25:35 |
Oh, that's good. |
| 00:25:38 |
You're not eating your food. |
| 00:25:41 |
Oh, you stupid, stupid man! |
| 00:25:43 |
I can't believe that you said |
| 00:25:46 |
I thought you would like it! |
| 00:25:49 |
Don't you get it, Ron? |
| 00:25:51 |
Well, I doubt anyone heard it, |
| 00:25:55 |
- Besides, I think people-- |
| 00:25:57 |
- Congrats on getting it on. |
| 00:26:00 |
I bet you're both |
| 00:26:03 |
Let's just say |
| 00:26:05 |
And this little lady over here, |
| 00:26:08 |
- Man: Yeah. |
| 00:26:11 |
- Are you both athletic? |
| 00:26:14 |
Bad lower back, so I have |
| 00:26:17 |
But other than that, I will do |
| 00:26:20 |
- that'll blow your mind. |
| 00:26:22 |
- Shh! |
| 00:26:27 |
That was very nice. |
| 00:26:31 |
I'm sorry, Veronica. I-- |
| 00:26:33 |
I truly am! |
| 00:26:35 |
I don't know what to say, |
| 00:26:38 |
I got excited. |
| 00:26:40 |
Look, I report the news, |
| 00:26:42 |
And today's top story... |
| 00:26:45 |
in Ron Burgundy's world |
| 00:26:49 |
''I love Veronica Corningstone.'' |
| 00:26:55 |
Oh, Ron! |
| 00:26:59 |
Are you two about |
| 00:27:01 |
Oh no, no, no, no. |
| 00:27:04 |
- Okay, stop answering him. |
| 00:27:07 |
You know, 'cause getting it on's |
| 00:27:10 |
Hi, hi! |
| 00:27:13 |
Geoff Grendon. I didn't |
| 00:27:15 |
E-O-double F. |
| 00:27:17 |
- Geoff Grendon. |
| 00:27:20 |
- If you ever need wedding photography-- |
| 00:27:23 |
Or boudoir photography. |
| 00:27:25 |
I'd love to write that down. |
| 00:27:28 |
- You're being very inappropriate. |
| 00:27:30 |
Do y'all need more cheese? |
| 00:27:33 |
Honey, can I have your napkin |
| 00:27:36 |
- G-E-O-F-F-- |
| 00:27:38 |
- G-E-O-F-F, Grendon. |
| 00:27:41 |
Well, I understand, |
| 00:27:43 |
But, he is my son |
| 00:27:46 |
if you didn't refer to him |
| 00:27:48 |
Well, okay, if that |
| 00:27:51 |
But let me just say I... |
| 00:27:54 |
that he's ready to turn |
| 00:27:56 |
What's that? |
| 00:27:59 |
You don't? |
| 00:28:01 |
But let me just say-- |
| 00:28:02 |
Let me just-- |
| 00:28:05 |
Let me-- okay. |
| 00:28:08 |
Well, thanks for listening |
| 00:28:10 |
You have a nice day. |
| 00:28:14 |
Um... I could come back later, |
| 00:28:16 |
No, no, it's just |
| 00:28:19 |
It seems that |
| 00:28:22 |
was joyriding with a sheet |
| 00:28:25 |
Anywho, what can I |
| 00:28:28 |
Mr. Harken, I wanna investigate |
| 00:28:31 |
A source of mine at the FBl |
| 00:28:32 |
says that they are planning |
| 00:28:35 |
Take a shot at the meat loaf story, |
| 00:28:39 |
Well, what if I refuse? |
| 00:28:40 |
Well, then you'll |
| 00:28:43 |
Garth, let me handle this! |
| 00:28:45 |
I'd probably have |
| 00:28:48 |
Well, then I would sue you, sir, |
| 00:28:51 |
for sexual harassment. |
| 00:28:53 |
Ooh, I like |
| 00:28:56 |
Sexual Her-ass-ment. |
| 00:29:00 |
Mr. Harken, you have a lot to learn |
| 00:29:03 |
''You have a lot to learn about a |
| 00:29:07 |
That is very immature |
| 00:29:09 |
''That is very immature |
| 00:29:12 |
- Stop it. Stop it! |
| 00:29:14 |
- Stop it! |
| 00:29:15 |
Oh my God, nobody has done that |
| 00:29:18 |
''No one has done that to me |
| 00:29:21 |
Screw you, Harken! |
| 00:29:23 |
Wait a minute, are you |
| 00:29:25 |
Because if you are, |
| 00:29:28 |
Narrator: Veronica was doing |
| 00:29:32 |
some would even say |
| 00:29:35 |
Veronica continued to win |
| 00:29:39 |
Ron's ego finally gave. |
| 00:29:43 |
He would love Veronica, he would even |
| 00:29:46 |
but he would not be |
| 00:29:50 |
She's got to be stopped. |
| 00:29:52 |
- This has gone too far. |
| 00:29:56 |
Ron Burgundy is a lead anchor. |
| 00:29:58 |
She's writing |
| 00:30:00 |
Her own stories, Ron. |
| 00:30:03 |
Not to mention what this is doing |
| 00:30:08 |
It's good to have you back. That female |
| 00:30:12 |
- I like Ron. |
| 00:30:16 |
Champ: Remember |
| 00:30:18 |
that was supposed to do |
| 00:30:21 |
Oh yeah, we were |
| 00:30:23 |
He was gay, all right. I made out |
| 00:30:27 |
- What? |
| 00:30:30 |
I say we run Corningstone out |
| 00:30:33 |
Well, I'm in. |
| 00:30:36 |
So, it's settled. |
| 00:30:39 |
By the way, Brick, |
| 00:30:43 |
Oh, it's one of those... |
| 00:30:46 |
delicious falafel hot dogs |
| 00:30:50 |
What do you mean |
| 00:30:52 |
Those don't exist. |
| 00:30:54 |
I mean, that's a used coffee filter |
| 00:30:59 |
Well, I got it out of the food basket |
| 00:31:04 |
- That's the garbage can. |
| 00:31:09 |
Although with the cooking at this place, |
| 00:31:12 |
- Whammy. |
| 00:31:20 |
Ron: Oh, that is true. |
| 00:31:24 |
An astute observation |
| 00:31:28 |
We are laughing. |
| 00:31:38 |
And it is continuing, |
| 00:31:42 |
- but there's still a good spirit-- |
| 00:31:46 |
It's getting less. |
| 00:31:48 |
and it's done. |
| 00:31:51 |
You really wreck moments |
| 00:31:56 |
Brick, please... |
| 00:32:02 |
The Coast Guard |
| 00:32:05 |
- Veronica? |
| 00:32:08 |
with an antique sword |
| 00:32:10 |
It turns out the sword belonged |
| 00:32:13 |
and may be worth $200,000. |
| 00:32:15 |
keep his job as a car wash attendant. |
| 00:32:23 |
The... San Diego Padres... |
| 00:32:26 |
flew to Cincinnati. |
| 00:32:29 |
Veronica Corningstone. |
| 00:32:33 |
- ls this Veronica Corningstone? |
| 00:32:37 |
Did you order... 10 pizzas? |
| 00:32:40 |
- No, I did not. |
| 00:32:45 |
you got nice boobies. |
| 00:32:47 |
Excuse me? |
| 00:32:52 |
This is pathetic, Ron. |
| 00:32:55 |
Veronica: |
| 00:33:03 |
She can see us. |
| 00:33:08 |
Damn these blinds, |
| 00:33:10 |
Lasers are becoming |
| 00:33:13 |
a part of our daily lives. |
| 00:33:15 |
And now here's Champ Kind |
| 00:33:19 |
Boy, you seem |
| 00:33:21 |
It must be that time of the month. |
| 00:33:25 |
Padres looking at |
| 00:33:28 |
I'm just curious, Champ, |
| 00:33:30 |
what the expression |
| 00:33:35 |
Sure I do. |
| 00:33:38 |
It's when the bones... |
| 00:33:41 |
lady's boobs, they get sore. |
| 00:33:46 |
Because of the... |
| 00:33:48 |
the vaginalistic cells are... |
| 00:33:51 |
expanding. |
| 00:33:53 |
Whammy. |
| 00:33:55 |
Help. |
| 00:33:58 |
Well, I'll tell you... |
| 00:34:01 |
You girls, you talk about it |
| 00:34:04 |
I know this, I know-- I know... |
| 00:34:07 |
it's your little friend, |
| 00:34:10 |
and then, you gotta wear... |
| 00:34:13 |
- protection. |
| 00:34:15 |
And then, |
| 00:34:17 |
the belly button |
| 00:34:20 |
and... |
| 00:34:23 |
and then engorging of the... |
| 00:34:26 |
- fah-la-cule. |
| 00:34:30 |
Yeah. You might wanna |
| 00:34:32 |
- Oh, I am. |
| 00:34:34 |
You didn't know you were dealing |
| 00:34:39 |
Champ: And then... |
| 00:34:41 |
nine months later is the miracle |
| 00:34:47 |
Thank-- thank you, Champ. |
| 00:34:49 |
That will do it for sports. |
| 00:34:51 |
Well, that was Champ Kind |
| 00:34:56 |
Okay, it's ringing, |
| 00:34:58 |
- It's ringing. |
| 00:35:01 |
- Pick it up. |
| 00:35:04 |
Veronica Cor... |
| 00:35:10 |
Hello, Veronica. |
| 00:35:14 |
( chuckling ) |
| 00:35:20 |
Really stupid, boys! |
| 00:35:25 |
Oh, you got her. |
| 00:35:37 |
Everybody get down, |
| 00:35:43 |
Paul: |
| 00:35:45 |
It's time to let |
| 00:35:47 |
and wake up |
| 00:35:49 |
in this city of lies! |
| 00:35:53 |
We got guns, |
| 00:35:58 |
What do your masks mean? |
| 00:36:00 |
Just fill the sack |
| 00:36:02 |
Just what point |
| 00:36:05 |
- Do you not like Lincoln? |
| 00:36:08 |
- He freed the slaves. |
| 00:36:12 |
Nixon and... |
| 00:36:14 |
werewolves? |
| 00:36:16 |
- What? |
| 00:36:19 |
He's kind of a creep, |
| 00:36:21 |
Werewolves are |
| 00:36:23 |
They're bloodthirsty killers. |
| 00:36:25 |
- Who likes werewolves? |
| 00:36:28 |
- We hate werewolves! |
| 00:36:31 |
- so... |
| 00:36:33 |
Are you bloodthirsty killers? |
| 00:36:34 |
No, we are not bloodthirsty killers, |
| 00:36:37 |
That's not a really smart thing to tell |
| 00:36:41 |
'cause now I know |
| 00:36:43 |
- Man, somebody shut her up! |
| 00:36:45 |
You've got it all wrong, okay? |
| 00:36:49 |
No, I'm not gonna give you money, |
| 00:36:52 |
You say you're a political group? |
| 00:36:55 |
with a Nixon mask, |
| 00:36:57 |
and a Lincoln mask-- |
| 00:36:59 |
So, what's your statement? |
| 00:37:01 |
And this guy's not even |
| 00:37:03 |
'Cause I don't give a shit. |
| 00:37:05 |
That's scary to me. |
| 00:37:07 |
That works. |
| 00:37:08 |
I will give that gentleman |
| 00:37:11 |
But the rest of you, beat it! |
| 00:37:13 |
What's going on? |
| 00:37:15 |
Hey, listen. |
| 00:37:18 |
not consistency. |
| 00:37:21 |
Fine, your commitment is to truth? |
| 00:37:24 |
The Alarm Clock |
| 00:37:26 |
- It's not scary. |
| 00:37:29 |
- let's shoot her! |
| 00:37:32 |
- could you lower your voice? |
| 00:37:34 |
Now you're calling me sir? |
| 00:37:36 |
I am a ma'am, ma'am. |
| 00:37:38 |
I'm sorry, I didn't know what sex |
| 00:37:41 |
How many werewolves do you see |
| 00:37:44 |
and a gun? None! |
| 00:37:46 |
You know what? Get out of here, |
| 00:37:50 |
I told you we should've |
| 00:37:52 |
All right, let's get out of here! |
| 00:37:55 |
All right, let's go. Come on. |
| 00:37:57 |
It's been a pleasure |
| 00:38:00 |
I'm coming back for you. |
| 00:38:02 |
You've got a bad attitude, sir. |
| 00:38:04 |
You-- you're a jerk. |
| 00:38:10 |
( Mouse sighs ) I'm sick of this. |
| 00:38:13 |
Paul: No! I mean, |
| 00:38:15 |
we're gonna get our message |
| 00:38:17 |
I would like the next person |
| 00:38:21 |
Everybody get down! |
| 00:38:24 |
We are The Alarm Clock, |
| 00:38:27 |
and wake up all the squares |
| 00:38:31 |
We got guns, now fill |
| 00:38:34 |
Turn it off. |
| 00:38:37 |
This was their sloppiest |
| 00:38:39 |
which could mean |
| 00:38:41 |
- How new is this? |
| 00:38:43 |
Channel 9 already aired it |
| 00:38:45 |
- Aw, man nipple! |
| 00:38:47 |
- ls that a curse word? |
| 00:38:50 |
It's too bad, Ed. |
| 00:38:56 |
''Wake up all the squares |
| 00:39:00 |
God, I've heard that |
| 00:39:03 |
Really? |
| 00:39:08 |
Veronica: |
| 00:39:11 |
- Donna? |
| 00:39:14 |
- I'm sorry. You okay? |
| 00:39:16 |
Listen, Donna, |
| 00:39:18 |
of the cat fashion show |
| 00:39:20 |
- Do you have that? |
| 00:39:23 |
Oh, wonderful. |
| 00:39:26 |
- Here we go. |
| 00:39:28 |
Can I just say that I think |
| 00:39:30 |
- Oh... |
| 00:39:33 |
And you're a girl. |
| 00:39:36 |
It just makes me |
| 00:39:38 |
or ''You go, girl!'' |
| 00:39:40 |
Keep working on that. |
| 00:39:43 |
''Keep it up, lady.'' |
| 00:39:46 |
- That's probably silly. |
| 00:39:49 |
- Oh, oh yeah. |
| 00:39:51 |
- very much. |
| 00:39:54 |
And I'm bisexual. |
| 00:39:57 |
I'm having a fondue party... |
| 00:39:59 |
in my pants. |
| 00:40:02 |
- You're gonna have to move off-camera. |
| 00:40:04 |
You've got to let the truth ring out, |
| 00:40:07 |
in this city of lies. |
| 00:40:12 |
Garth, put Harken |
| 00:40:15 |
he's gonna wanna hear this. |
| 00:40:20 |
Sons of bitches. |
| 00:40:24 |
Ed? |
| 00:40:26 |
Can you spell ''award''? |
| 00:40:30 |
You can't? |
| 00:40:32 |
You're watching Channel 4 News |
| 00:40:35 |
with Ron Burgundy, |
| 00:40:38 |
Veronica Corningstone. |
| 00:40:41 |
It's Channel 4 News at 6:00. |
| 00:40:45 |
- I'm Ron Burgundy. |
| 00:40:48 |
Tonight's top story. |
| 00:40:52 |
has closed down all lanes |
| 00:40:55 |
CHP has evacuated the area, |
| 00:40:57 |
and has reported |
| 00:41:00 |
Local officials are concerned |
| 00:41:02 |
about the long-term |
| 00:41:04 |
and are looking |
| 00:41:06 |
Yeah, that's nice, Billy. |
| 00:41:08 |
I've witnessed train wrecks |
| 00:41:11 |
Also, in other news today, if you're |
| 00:41:14 |
it's gonna cost you extra. |
| 00:41:16 |
City officials have raised |
| 00:41:18 |
from 25¢ a ride to 35¢, |
| 00:41:22 |
so you're gonna have to |
| 00:41:25 |
Fine! |
| 00:41:27 |
Ed: I know this has been |
| 00:41:29 |
I'm not gonna lie to you, Ed, |
| 00:41:32 |
- You aren't crying, are you? |
| 00:41:35 |
I wouldn't think |
| 00:41:37 |
- I'm not gonna cry, come on. |
| 00:41:39 |
If it's any consolation, Ron, |
| 00:41:42 |
She is damn good. |
| 00:41:43 |
- She is a dynamic anchor. |
| 00:41:45 |
What's more, she is a hell |
| 00:41:48 |
- I know you don't wanna hear it. |
| 00:41:51 |
Now look, I think it's time |
| 00:41:54 |
and do some real hard-hitting |
| 00:41:56 |
I wanna-- I wanna-- |
| 00:41:59 |
I've really been pondering, and I think |
| 00:42:02 |
Oh, boy, Ron, |
| 00:42:06 |
You know, you don't do well |
| 00:42:09 |
Well, that's just a rumor, okay? |
| 00:42:11 |
Now look, let me put together |
| 00:42:14 |
where I rip the lid off |
| 00:42:19 |
Hey Harken, nice suspenders, dick. |
| 00:42:24 |
- What was that all about? |
| 00:42:28 |
Look, Ron, people seem |
| 00:42:31 |
but I'll tell you what. I'll put you |
| 00:42:34 |
- Great. |
| 00:42:37 |
I mean, follow leads, |
| 00:42:39 |
I am talking real journalism, |
| 00:42:42 |
Great. Right on. |
| 00:42:44 |
Now, what's a lead? |
| 00:42:46 |
Well, Ron, a lead |
| 00:42:49 |
that ''leads'' you |
| 00:42:52 |
- Of course, you know what a source is. |
| 00:42:55 |
No, I lied, |
| 00:42:57 |
Well, a sour-- oh, Jeez. Why don't you |
| 00:43:00 |
- She has a handle on what's going on. |
| 00:43:02 |
She's always on the phone, |
| 00:43:05 |
She's probably got |
| 00:43:07 |
- I'll watch her like a hawk. |
| 00:43:10 |
- Now, I'm gonna go grab some steam. |
| 00:43:13 |
Ron, ''I'm'' gonna go grab |
| 00:43:15 |
- Right. See you, Ed. |
| 00:43:17 |
I won't let you down. |
| 00:43:20 |
Helen? |
| 00:43:22 |
Helen, has anyone |
| 00:43:25 |
Because I am missing some |
| 00:43:27 |
- for a story that I'm working on. |
| 00:43:30 |
he said there were |
| 00:43:32 |
he wanted to get them |
| 00:43:35 |
What? He did what? |
| 00:43:37 |
Oh, that... man! |
| 00:43:40 |
I hope that crazy gypsies |
| 00:43:42 |
and feed it to the dogs! |
| 00:43:53 |
- May I have some tea? |
| 00:43:56 |
You have such passion. |
| 00:44:00 |
All right, team, I've got |
| 00:44:02 |
Really? Where'd you get it? |
| 00:44:04 |
- Stole it from Corningstone. |
| 00:44:07 |
It says Paul Hauser, |
| 00:44:10 |
is head of the radical political group |
| 00:44:13 |
Has his home address |
| 00:44:16 |
- This is great. |
| 00:44:18 |
This is a big story. |
| 00:44:21 |
Hey, look, a camera. |
| 00:44:23 |
Hey, if I win the Wurlitzer, |
| 00:44:26 |
- What do you say we do it, gang? |
| 00:44:30 |
Step on it, Brian. We're about |
| 00:44:48 |
I'm Ron Burgundy, San Diego, |
| 00:44:50 |
and it's time to rip |
| 00:44:52 |
I'm Ron Burgundy, reporting to you |
| 00:44:56 |
So mean, in fact, |
| 00:44:59 |
Guess what, citizens? |
| 00:45:02 |
who's been eluding authorities |
| 00:45:05 |
But I'm now going to-- |
| 00:45:09 |
Ron: |
| 00:45:12 |
Be swift. Be swift. |
| 00:45:15 |
Stay close, guys. |
| 00:45:18 |
Let's go, guys, |
| 00:45:21 |
Well, if it isn't Mr. Hauser. |
| 00:45:24 |
- What? |
| 00:45:26 |
You are the devil incarnate. |
| 00:45:28 |
What is that, a devil sandwich |
| 00:45:32 |
I think you must have |
| 00:45:35 |
- Do I have the wrong house? |
| 00:45:39 |
Oh, that's a deceptive ploy, |
| 00:45:42 |
I ought to knock you in the hip. |
| 00:45:44 |
My name is Anthony Caltran. |
| 00:45:46 |
Why don't you shut your mouth, |
| 00:45:49 |
Go to back to prison where every pervert |
| 00:45:52 |
I don't understand. |
| 00:45:55 |
Would you like to tell the fine people of San |
| 00:45:58 |
Lies, corruption, deceit? |
| 00:46:00 |
- Thuggery, buffoonery. |
| 00:46:02 |
I don't like the way |
| 00:46:05 |
You should avert your gaze, |
| 00:46:07 |
who doesn't pay taxes and, as far |
| 00:46:11 |
- No, not I. |
| 00:46:13 |
if I boxed you in the ears |
| 00:46:16 |
This-- this ring right here |
| 00:46:18 |
I'd knock and break both of those-- |
| 00:46:22 |
I got problems already with my ears. |
| 00:46:25 |
I'll give you more problems. |
| 00:46:28 |
I'm gonna batter your kidneys. |
| 00:46:31 |
- I'm going to town. |
| 00:46:33 |
- This is gonna be good. |
| 00:46:36 |
The mailbox, it says Caltran. |
| 00:46:40 |
My apologies. Sorry, |
| 00:46:43 |
We make mistakes, that's okay. |
| 00:46:46 |
All right, let's try over here. |
| 00:46:49 |
Stay focused, |
| 00:46:52 |
On behalf of Channel 4 News |
| 00:46:56 |
I'd just like to say thank you |
| 00:46:58 |
for letting us interview you |
| 00:47:01 |
I don't know why you guys |
| 00:47:03 |
- I just sell tropical fish. |
| 00:47:06 |
As a real journalist, |
| 00:47:11 |
Are you the leader of a radical group |
| 00:47:15 |
- No. |
| 00:47:18 |
All right, let's get that cable up |
| 00:47:20 |
I think we should... |
| 00:47:22 |
Oh, yes. |
| 00:47:25 |
Then how do you respond |
| 00:47:28 |
outside the bank five minutes |
| 00:47:31 |
by four members of the group? |
| 00:47:34 |
You're touching his face, |
| 00:47:39 |
Well, that happens |
| 00:47:41 |
Just because I go there doesn't |
| 00:47:44 |
By that logic, you could arrest anybody |
| 00:47:50 |
Paul: |
| 00:47:52 |
I just-- I work in a pet store, |
| 00:47:54 |
Pet Shack, you know? |
| 00:47:57 |
- I sell tropical birds. |
| 00:48:01 |
I'm not even-- |
| 00:48:04 |
Once again, I am sorry. |
| 00:48:06 |
All right, let's bring the van |
| 00:48:08 |
- and maybe get lunch at Lancer's. |
| 00:48:11 |
I'll have a veal chop. |
| 00:48:14 |
- Look at these. |
| 00:48:16 |
Oh, right. |
| 00:48:20 |
Then how do you explain |
| 00:48:23 |
between you and the man |
| 00:48:28 |
A lot of guys talk like I do. |
| 00:48:31 |
- Maybe it's my brother. |
| 00:48:34 |
- Hadn't thought of that. |
| 00:48:38 |
Or maybe The Alarm Clock |
| 00:48:42 |
You're gonna pay for this, |
| 00:48:44 |
Let the truth ring out! |
| 00:48:46 |
Follow him with the camera! |
| 00:48:48 |
Ron: |
| 00:48:52 |
Boy, we really ripped |
| 00:49:02 |
He took the van. |
| 00:49:04 |
Oh my God. |
| 00:49:07 |
Ron's voice: |
| 00:49:09 |
All right, |
| 00:49:11 |
Since this report was filed, |
| 00:49:13 |
Paul Hauser has disappeared. |
| 00:49:16 |
Unfortunately, police were |
| 00:49:20 |
but now must start |
| 00:49:23 |
Well, that was |
| 00:49:26 |
Well, I appreciate that, |
| 00:49:29 |
I really kind of found myself |
| 00:49:31 |
as a reporter, as journalist. |
| 00:49:33 |
But, that's my job. |
| 00:49:36 |
I'm a very good journalist. |
| 00:49:38 |
I'm a damn fine journalist. |
| 00:49:40 |
And right now, |
| 00:49:45 |
But, that's part of the game. |
| 00:49:47 |
And sometimes some people |
| 00:49:50 |
So, coming up |
| 00:49:53 |
Brick Tamland, he's gonna |
| 00:49:57 |
We have a hot one in store |
| 00:50:00 |
It's 100, and you can expect |
| 00:50:03 |
Not yet, Brick. |
| 00:50:05 |
- We'll be right back. |
| 00:50:11 |
Huh? That's |
| 00:50:13 |
- by the way, P.S. |
| 00:50:16 |
Unbelievably good. |
| 00:50:18 |
Champ: That was great, |
| 00:50:21 |
Thank you, I couldn't |
| 00:50:25 |
Narrator: |
| 00:50:28 |
stealing another reporter's lead |
| 00:50:30 |
and not to mention |
| 00:50:34 |
Ron was fired that night |
| 00:50:37 |
And once again, |
| 00:50:41 |
Driver: |
| 00:50:45 |
Narrator: In fact, Ron bottomed out |
| 00:50:50 |
He sometimes bottomed out |
| 00:50:54 |
or if the sports section |
| 00:50:58 |
Anyway, I feel like |
| 00:51:06 |
Narrator: |
| 00:51:09 |
I'm recording narration, |
| 00:51:13 |
Sorry about that. |
| 00:51:17 |
? You got me going in circles. ? |
| 00:51:23 |
Announcer: |
| 00:51:27 |
Good evening, San Diego. |
| 00:51:31 |
This just in. |
| 00:51:33 |
The group The Alarm Clock, |
| 00:51:36 |
- ran an armored car off the road today |
| 00:51:39 |
and stole nearly $50,000. |
| 00:51:41 |
- Oh, for crying out loud! |
| 00:51:43 |
ever since they stole it |
| 00:51:46 |
I hope you're happy. |
| 00:51:48 |
I'm trying to just enjoy my ribs. |
| 00:51:57 |
From all of us here |
| 00:52:00 |
I'm Veronica Corningstone |
| 00:52:02 |
and you stay classy, San Di-- |
| 00:52:06 |
Thanks for stopping by, |
| 00:52:11 |
Man: |
| 00:52:15 |
Charlie, I needed |
| 00:52:18 |
Well, get it to me |
| 00:52:21 |
- Miss Corningstone? |
| 00:52:23 |
I tried calling the mayor's office, |
| 00:52:26 |
Well, try again. |
| 00:52:28 |
and that he owes me something. |
| 00:52:33 |
Why do you have to keep |
| 00:52:52 |
Helen, would you put Ron |
| 00:52:56 |
You know what? Forget it. |
| 00:52:59 |
It's all right, no. |
| 00:53:11 |
The Vs aren't working |
| 00:53:14 |
It's ''eronica Corningstone.'' |
| 00:53:19 |
My name's not Eronica. |
| 00:53:38 |
What did I do wrong? |
| 00:53:48 |
Ron's voice: |
| 00:53:50 |
? I am not home ? |
| 00:53:53 |
? I am out, so leave a message ? |
| 00:53:55 |
? When the machine goes beep. ? |
| 00:53:57 |
Ron, this is your mentor, |
| 00:54:02 |
I thought maybe |
| 00:54:04 |
Jess... |
| 00:54:07 |
help me. |
| 00:54:10 |
Ron: |
| 00:54:12 |
Yeah, I dreaded |
| 00:54:15 |
until I found this piece |
| 00:54:18 |
- It's God's country. |
| 00:54:21 |
Mother Nature sure got up |
| 00:54:27 |
She's a giving lady, |
| 00:54:30 |
She didn't even bother |
| 00:54:36 |
You know, I'd deeply like |
| 00:54:40 |
- make love to her. |
| 00:54:42 |
She's an elusive goddess, |
| 00:54:44 |
Yeah. |
| 00:54:47 |
Still, to... |
| 00:54:49 |
feel her succulent breasts |
| 00:54:52 |
- Mmm. |
| 00:54:54 |
whispering hot in her ear... |
| 00:54:58 |
''Yeah, baby...'' |
| 00:55:01 |
while I fumble |
| 00:55:04 |
You get my drift, friend? |
| 00:55:06 |
Yeah, yeah I do. |
| 00:55:09 |
I do, but therein |
| 00:55:11 |
for she turns away |
| 00:55:14 |
I'd like to take Mother Nature |
| 00:55:17 |
get in the shower and... |
| 00:55:20 |
wash each other all over, |
| 00:55:22 |
then go in the bedroom and do things |
| 00:55:26 |
All right, I'm gonna |
| 00:55:28 |
You're making me |
| 00:55:31 |
Sorry, Ron Burgundy, I-- |
| 00:55:33 |
Mother Nature |
| 00:55:36 |
So I guess you heard |
| 00:55:40 |
I did indeed, old friend. |
| 00:55:43 |
Everyone hates me, Jess. |
| 00:55:45 |
I can't work anywhere. |
| 00:55:48 |
My dream of going network |
| 00:55:51 |
Now you listen to me, |
| 00:55:54 |
the world always needs |
| 00:55:56 |
and Ron Burgundy |
| 00:55:59 |
so you just hang in there. |
| 00:56:04 |
That's your advice? |
| 00:56:07 |
Look, I don't know why |
| 00:56:09 |
you ever looked up to me |
| 00:56:12 |
I'm not all that great a guy. |
| 00:56:14 |
Well then, I guess |
| 00:56:16 |
You know, it's funny. |
| 00:56:18 |
I always wanted to do a broadcast |
| 00:56:21 |
I bet you could reach |
| 00:56:26 |
Now I'd be happy |
| 00:56:29 |
Why don't you take |
| 00:56:33 |
- It'd cheer you up. |
| 00:56:37 |
I tell you, you get out there |
| 00:56:40 |
- Kind of weird. |
| 00:56:44 |
- Not my style. |
| 00:56:47 |
- and that cold nose-- |
| 00:56:50 |
I got extra sandals. |
| 00:56:53 |
- I bet you do. |
| 00:56:55 |
- Nope. Nope. |
| 00:56:57 |
- Nope. |
| 00:56:59 |
- Not gonna do it. |
| 00:57:05 |
Well, hello, |
| 00:57:08 |
Guess what? Now you're gonna |
| 00:57:11 |
I hope you don't mind, |
| 00:57:18 |
Hey, what're you doing? |
| 00:57:21 |
Let's go. |
| 00:57:22 |
- Move! |
| 00:57:28 |
Chris, how many times |
| 00:57:31 |
- About a million times. |
| 00:57:34 |
so listen up. You cannot |
| 00:57:38 |
- wearing a ski mask. |
| 00:57:41 |
- Well, it makes them nervous. |
| 00:57:45 |
If you have to be back there, |
| 00:57:47 |
see what you gotta see |
| 00:57:49 |
- Bitch. |
| 00:57:51 |
- don't try to ''shut them up.'' |
| 00:57:55 |
Now what do you think? |
| 00:57:56 |
Oh, sweet. Thanks, dude. |
| 00:58:00 |
Will you put that thing out? |
| 00:58:03 |
Shut up! You're not |
| 00:58:06 |
See the hair on my chest? |
| 00:58:09 |
I'm sorry I didn't see it. |
| 00:58:11 |
Take a swing. |
| 00:58:13 |
you'll be wearing a catheter |
| 00:58:15 |
I'm right here! |
| 00:58:18 |
Oh, promises, promises! |
| 00:58:20 |
- Ed! I'm sorry to interrupt. |
| 00:58:23 |
just having a little |
| 00:58:25 |
Veronica's MlA. The police found |
| 00:58:30 |
''Dig it, at long last, |
| 00:58:32 |
will read the truth.'' |
| 00:58:36 |
See, Dad? I told you I wasn't |
| 00:58:38 |
Okay, it looks like |
| 00:58:41 |
Always accusing me. |
| 00:58:43 |
Hey, don't ''boge'' on my jay! |
| 00:58:46 |
Oh... never mind! |
| 00:58:48 |
I'll hold that as evidence. |
| 00:58:51 |
We don't have fingerprinting, |
| 00:58:56 |
You'd do well |
| 00:58:58 |
He's pulled himself up |
| 00:59:00 |
''Garth, take this down |
| 00:59:03 |
- ''Garth, do everything I say.'' |
| 00:59:06 |
I suppose you wanna |
| 00:59:08 |
who's so proud of himself |
| 00:59:11 |
Spider at least |
| 00:59:14 |
In local news... |
| 00:59:18 |
Dr. Jim Bavelick |
| 00:59:21 |
grew the world's largest tomato. |
| 00:59:24 |
Hey, fella, |
| 00:59:26 |
you need to take a bath. |
| 00:59:28 |
You don't talk to me like that, |
| 00:59:31 |
You take care of that stink, |
| 00:59:34 |
- You hear me, Ace? |
| 00:59:36 |
I'll crush your balls |
| 00:59:40 |
- What did you say? |
| 00:59:42 |
This is Wes Mantooth reporting |
| 00:59:45 |
of rival anchorperson |
| 00:59:48 |
where last night she was |
| 00:59:51 |
Veronica. |
| 00:59:53 |
Police believe that the group |
| 00:59:56 |
to anchor a pirate broadcast |
| 01:00:00 |
of their sick, twisted message. |
| 01:00:03 |
And while it is not my job |
| 01:00:06 |
odds are... |
| 01:00:09 |
she's probably already dead. |
| 01:00:11 |
Bartender: |
| 01:00:14 |
It must be somewhere |
| 01:00:17 |
Eli Whitney's nose! |
| 01:00:20 |
I know where they are! |
| 01:00:23 |
- It's the highest point in the area. |
| 01:00:26 |
- there's a phone right by the door. |
| 01:00:28 |
If they go up there |
| 01:00:30 |
those crazies could panic. |
| 01:00:32 |
I did this. |
| 01:00:45 |
Good evening, I'm Ron Burgundy. |
| 01:00:47 |
Son of a man nipple. |
| 01:00:50 |
Mother-flippin' |
| 01:00:53 |
If I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna need |
| 01:01:05 |
Ron: |
| 01:01:07 |
assemble! |
| 01:01:10 |
I'm sorry we turned |
| 01:01:12 |
Champ: |
| 01:01:14 |
Hey, all is forgiven, all right? |
| 01:01:16 |
I'm just glad we're |
| 01:01:21 |
- We love you, Ron. |
| 01:01:25 |
I love you, Ron. |
| 01:01:30 |
I said I love you, Ron. |
| 01:01:34 |
Why is everyone ignoring me? |
| 01:01:37 |
I love you, Ron. |
| 01:01:41 |
And I think we should |
| 01:01:44 |
Answer me! |
| 01:01:46 |
So... |
| 01:01:48 |
the car's running great. |
| 01:01:50 |
- Oh, yeah, yeah. |
| 01:01:52 |
- Yeah. Changed the oil and... |
| 01:01:55 |
Answer me! Ron! |
| 01:01:59 |
Ron... |
| 01:02:01 |
I know you heard me. |
| 01:02:03 |
I love you. |
| 01:02:06 |
And I wanna be with you... |
| 01:02:09 |
like men. |
| 01:02:14 |
I want you inside me. |
| 01:02:17 |
- Brian: Anybody up for the radio? |
| 01:02:21 |
No radio! |
| 01:02:24 |
You know I've had feelings |
| 01:02:30 |
We'd be good together, Ron, |
| 01:02:32 |
I'm a good cook. |
| 01:02:34 |
Do you like |
| 01:02:36 |
I'll rub 'em, |
| 01:02:40 |
get married in a ceremony |
| 01:02:44 |
I already called him last week, |
| 01:02:46 |
Mexican food on me? |
| 01:02:48 |
- Brian: Thanks. Sounds okay. |
| 01:02:50 |
Say it! |
| 01:02:52 |
Say, ''Champ Burgundy.'' |
| 01:02:55 |
Tostada. |
| 01:02:57 |
- Tostadas would be great. |
| 01:03:00 |
I am in love |
| 01:03:03 |
I'm always thinking |
| 01:03:05 |
I have dream journals |
| 01:03:09 |
Filled pages. |
| 01:03:11 |
When I make love to women, |
| 01:03:14 |
and think of you |
| 01:03:16 |
? Ron Burgundy... ? |
| 01:03:19 |
? ls in love with me ? |
| 01:03:21 |
? Ron Burgundy ? |
| 01:03:24 |
? And Champion Kind ? |
| 01:03:27 |
? Oh, let's be |
| 01:03:31 |
? Running in the grass ? |
| 01:03:34 |
? In the summer and the fall ? |
| 01:03:36 |
? And wintertime, too. ? |
| 01:03:39 |
- How much longer do you think, Brian? |
| 01:03:42 |
- The problem is the altitude. |
| 01:03:44 |
Champ: Ron? |
| 01:03:48 |
I wanna... |
| 01:03:50 |
I wanna kiss you |
| 01:03:53 |
I wanna... |
| 01:03:55 |
Ron... |
| 01:03:57 |
Ron. |
| 01:04:07 |
Ron... |
| 01:04:10 |
- It's good to get my parking spot back. |
| 01:04:12 |
I love you! |
| 01:04:14 |
Don't ignore me! |
| 01:04:16 |
I am in love with Ron Burgundy! |
| 01:04:40 |
Paul: |
| 01:04:42 |
Man, the transmitter's |
| 01:04:44 |
From this altitude, |
| 01:04:48 |
every station, every frequency. |
| 01:04:51 |
Dig it. It's time |
| 01:04:55 |
I'm gonna tell you. |
| 01:05:08 |
Hello, gentlemen. |
| 01:05:10 |
Everything is ready for you. |
| 01:05:14 |
Thank you, Jess Moondragon. |
| 01:05:15 |
Boy, you should really |
| 01:05:19 |
It's all right. Now remember, |
| 01:05:20 |
the observatory |
| 01:05:23 |
- Right. |
| 01:05:25 |
- How're we gonna get up there? |
| 01:05:31 |
everything is ready for you. |
| 01:05:40 |
God be with you, |
| 01:05:42 |
God be with you! |
| 01:06:04 |
This is serious, this is not a-- |
| 01:06:09 |
No, don't do that to him. |
| 01:06:25 |
Ron: |
| 01:06:28 |
Come on! We've almost got it! |
| 01:06:37 |
Ron: |
| 01:06:41 |
This is treacherous country. |
| 01:06:44 |
My ankle. |
| 01:06:47 |
Gentlemen... |
| 01:06:49 |
bad news. |
| 01:06:52 |
Ron, what're we gonna do? |
| 01:06:54 |
Take it easy! |
| 01:06:58 |
If we panic, we die! |
| 01:07:07 |
Now... |
| 01:07:12 |
Okay, let's check |
| 01:07:15 |
And f-- |
| 01:07:18 |
Everyone shut up! |
| 01:07:20 |
some very tough decisions |
| 01:07:23 |
or maybe even months. |
| 01:07:25 |
Or even years, I don't know. |
| 01:07:27 |
Just spit it out, RB. |
| 01:07:31 |
Am I? ls that |
| 01:07:34 |
I guess I am. |
| 01:07:38 |
Developed by the Japanese |
| 01:07:41 |
and now we're |
| 01:07:44 |
in present day time. |
| 01:07:46 |
The eating of flesh |
| 01:07:50 |
What do you think of that? |
| 01:07:52 |
It's about to happen! |
| 01:07:54 |
Champ: |
| 01:07:56 |
Sweet Lord, I don't know |
| 01:08:00 |
I once ate |
| 01:08:03 |
I don't care, Brick! |
| 01:08:05 |
I just don't care! |
| 01:08:08 |
How's that twisted ankle |
| 01:08:11 |
It's fine. I barely |
| 01:08:20 |
Please, Brian, please. |
| 01:08:23 |
- Don't struggle. |
| 01:08:25 |
Come on. |
| 01:08:27 |
Just lay down |
| 01:08:32 |
- Oh no. |
| 01:08:34 |
- than it has to be. |
| 01:08:37 |
Let me do it, Ron. Don't need you |
| 01:08:40 |
? Hush little baby, |
| 01:08:44 |
? Mamma's gonna buy you... |
| 01:08:48 |
Wait, don't eat me, don't eat me. |
| 01:08:51 |
No, that's fine. |
| 01:08:53 |
- You're a lot leaner. |
| 01:08:57 |
Please relax. |
| 01:08:59 |
Think of something |
| 01:09:01 |
- or a meadow. |
| 01:09:04 |
- Stay away from me! |
| 01:09:07 |
- Back, back, back! |
| 01:09:09 |
I've wanted to do this |
| 01:09:12 |
Dreamt of it. |
| 01:09:16 |
- Stay away! |
| 01:09:19 |
off your bones, Fantana! |
| 01:09:21 |
Let me do it, Ron! |
| 01:09:23 |
You say it, |
| 01:09:26 |
- Do it, Champ. Drop the rock. |
| 01:09:29 |
Drop the rock. |
| 01:09:31 |
- It was an accident, that's all. |
| 01:09:36 |
- We had to eat him! We had to! |
| 01:09:39 |
Brian: |
| 01:09:42 |
Hey, you guys. |
| 01:09:47 |
Ron: Good work, Brick. |
| 01:09:50 |
Ron: |
| 01:09:54 |
Nice job. |
| 01:10:09 |
All right, gang, |
| 01:10:11 |
it's real simple. |
| 01:10:13 |
Just like when we were |
| 01:10:15 |
I'll take the point... |
| 01:10:17 |
Stand down, |
| 01:10:19 |
I'm running this show now. |
| 01:10:21 |
- Affirmative, a-ffir-ma-tive? |
| 01:10:26 |
I'll take point. |
| 01:10:29 |
Gator Dirty Teacup. |
| 01:10:32 |
to a cobra |
| 01:10:35 |
If we encounter |
| 01:10:39 |
silent throat cuts only. |
| 01:10:41 |
On my... mark. |
| 01:10:46 |
Looks like the captain's back. |
| 01:11:03 |
Any word yet from the police? |
| 01:11:05 |
Nothing. No sign of her. |
| 01:11:07 |
No one's heard from the rest |
| 01:11:10 |
Well, I hope they find them soon. |
| 01:11:12 |
These weekend anchors |
| 01:11:14 |
just not cutting it. |
| 01:11:16 |
- One of our own is missing. |
| 01:11:19 |
Miss Corningstone |
| 01:11:23 |
is missing. We are looking for... |
| 01:11:26 |
any information |
| 01:11:30 |
And you can call-- |
| 01:11:34 |
- Where's the friggin' number? |
| 01:11:37 |
I do have a message |
| 01:11:40 |
Mommy, if you're watching, |
| 01:11:43 |
I didn't know I was coming to work |
| 01:11:46 |
I left spaghetti on the stove, |
| 01:11:48 |
I will cut your hair tomorrow. |
| 01:11:50 |
I want them off the air now! |
| 01:11:54 |
Why don't you think |
| 01:11:57 |
Her name-- I can't-- lan! |
| 01:12:00 |
I can't find the number! |
| 01:12:04 |
You see, Mamma? |
| 01:12:07 |
When that anchor witch |
| 01:12:09 |
this city's gonna go crazy |
| 01:12:11 |
- Have you finished the manifesto? |
| 01:12:15 |
I gotta get a new typewriter ribbon. |
| 01:12:19 |
Ron! Ron, be careful. |
| 01:12:22 |
Blink and you're dead, |
| 01:12:26 |
Well, if it isn't |
| 01:12:33 |
Oh Ron, I can't believe |
| 01:12:37 |
I've been thinking |
| 01:12:41 |
Part of the time wanting to kill you, |
| 01:12:46 |
Another time, |
| 01:12:49 |
in a 24-hour endless cycle. |
| 01:12:52 |
Ron, there's something |
| 01:12:55 |
Shh, shh. You needn't |
| 01:12:58 |
But Ron, I wasn't myself. |
| 01:13:00 |
I was angry, I was consumed |
| 01:13:03 |
I'm sorry, my little chinchilla. |
| 01:13:05 |
If it wasn't |
| 01:13:08 |
we wouldn't be here right now. |
| 01:13:10 |
Okay, here's what's gonna happen, |
| 01:13:13 |
In 10 minutes, |
| 01:13:15 |
At that point, you will read |
| 01:13:18 |
The hell I will. |
| 01:13:20 |
Then we kill you. |
| 01:13:22 |
Go ahead. I am an anchor |
| 01:13:24 |
and I would rather die |
| 01:13:27 |
I'll do it. |
| 01:13:31 |
I've just been informed |
| 01:13:33 |
that this is the largest |
| 01:13:36 |
ever to be conducted |
| 01:13:39 |
ls this worth our tax dollars? |
| 01:13:42 |
Maybe it is. You decide that. |
| 01:13:45 |
One thing here today |
| 01:13:48 |
this is a frightening |
| 01:13:51 |
But I'm here for you, San Diego. |
| 01:13:54 |
Go on, pull up a chair. |
| 01:13:58 |
We'll get through |
| 01:14:00 |
I am Wes Mantooth, |
| 01:14:03 |
journalist, friend... |
| 01:14:05 |
human being. |
| 01:14:09 |
Brad: Listen up, everybody. We're going |
| 01:14:12 |
Ron: |
| 01:14:14 |
But I have to be honest with you-- |
| 01:14:16 |
this copy you've handed me, |
| 01:14:20 |
It's awful. But I can't possibly |
| 01:14:23 |
Besides, it needs to be typed |
| 01:14:27 |
Courier, Helvetica, Monaco, |
| 01:14:30 |
Okay, all right, enough. |
| 01:14:33 |
I'm almost done. |
| 01:14:35 |
- do this one part here. |
| 01:14:39 |
You been writing that manifesto |
| 01:14:42 |
- Read it before I kick your ass. |
| 01:14:45 |
You wanna hear the manifesto? |
| 01:14:48 |
Here is how The Alarm Clock |
| 01:14:57 |
All right, you know how |
| 01:15:01 |
drink beer or soda, |
| 01:15:03 |
and then we throw out |
| 01:15:08 |
Well, how about we start saving |
| 01:15:10 |
those bottles and cans? |
| 01:15:13 |
Reuse them. |
| 01:15:15 |
You are a lunatic. |
| 01:15:17 |
Yeah, you'd need a whole 'nother |
| 01:15:21 |
- People would never do that. |
| 01:15:24 |
you didn't let me get to the part |
| 01:15:26 |
so we don't have to be |
| 01:15:29 |
Electric cars? |
| 01:15:32 |
Man, are you high right now? |
| 01:15:34 |
You are, aren't you? |
| 01:15:37 |
- Oh, oh, oh! |
| 01:15:40 |
out of my purse. |
| 01:15:43 |
I would just shoot him |
| 01:15:45 |
We gotta-- we gotta |
| 01:15:47 |
that meat is good for you, |
| 01:15:50 |
and potatoes make you fat! |
| 01:15:53 |
Oh, man. |
| 01:15:55 |
You know what? I cannot believe |
| 01:15:58 |
I gave you all my Juicy Fruit, |
| 01:16:02 |
- I have had it! |
| 01:16:05 |
We should all have computers |
| 01:16:09 |
in our houses, every one of us, |
| 01:16:13 |
- with the computers. |
| 01:16:16 |
Huh-uh, now you're talkin' crazy. |
| 01:16:19 |
Man, did you eat lunch today? |
| 01:16:21 |
Man, you'll make us look like |
| 01:16:24 |
Man, this guy's a fake. |
| 01:16:26 |
Get on the TV |
| 01:16:29 |
Matter of fact, get on there |
| 01:16:32 |
so we can have the people |
| 01:16:35 |
They'll believe you. |
| 01:16:38 |
It's just not that simple. |
| 01:16:40 |
and I need proper copy. |
| 01:16:42 |
- Then the pretty lady dies. |
| 01:16:45 |
Man, look, make us |
| 01:16:52 |
We're on live in 10, nine, |
| 01:16:55 |
- eight, seven, six... |
| 01:16:58 |
- Ron... |
| 01:17:02 |
three, two, and we're live. |
| 01:17:05 |
three, two, and we're live. |
| 01:17:07 |
What's happening, Daddy? |
| 01:17:10 |
What happened to the TV? |
| 01:17:15 |
Ed: What in the Sam Hill-- |
| 01:17:17 |
It's on all three channels, |
| 01:17:19 |
They're breaking our signal. |
| 01:17:37 |
What the hell's |
| 01:17:46 |
Good lord! |
| 01:17:54 |
Tino: |
| 01:18:09 |
W-wash-- washcloth. |
| 01:18:13 |
Damn it. |
| 01:18:28 |
My name is Ron... |
| 01:18:33 |
Ron: |
| 01:18:35 |
Think of any word, just say it. |
| 01:18:38 |
Camel... |
| 01:18:41 |
Process the informa-- |
| 01:18:45 |
When I close my eyes, |
| 01:18:47 |
Man, this guy's a fool, man! |
| 01:18:51 |
Happy birthday to me. |
| 01:18:52 |
Ron, say something. |
| 01:18:55 |
My name is Kyle-- |
| 01:18:58 |
It's too loud. It's too loud. |
| 01:19:00 |
My name is Big... |
| 01:19:03 |
Too loud. |
| 01:19:05 |
I'm Mark A-As-Aspen. |
| 01:19:09 |
Aspen, Colorado. Mark. |
| 01:19:13 |
Astronauts are on the moon. |
| 01:19:17 |
Watch out for the astronauts. |
| 01:19:19 |
Ron. |
| 01:19:23 |
There's no Teleprompter, |
| 01:19:26 |
Ron, it's jazz. |
| 01:19:30 |
Let it flow. Let it flow. |
| 01:19:33 |
I can feel it. |
| 01:19:40 |
Good evening. |
| 01:19:43 |
reporting from life. |
| 01:19:47 |
for my past |
| 01:19:50 |
I am sorry, dear San Diego. |
| 01:19:54 |
First of all, I'd like you to know |
| 01:19:57 |
However, I'm under |
| 01:20:00 |
of a group of young upstarts |
| 01:20:05 |
And I have to say, although |
| 01:20:09 |
they are on the road |
| 01:20:11 |
to righteous truth. |
| 01:20:14 |
That's it, that's it. |
| 01:20:17 |
Have all them people follow us. |
| 01:20:19 |
A road that if you follow it |
| 01:20:22 |
it will lead you, oddly enough, |
| 01:20:26 |
- near the old pickle stand... |
| 01:20:28 |
He's giving directions |
| 01:20:30 |
- Take this down. |
| 01:20:33 |
A group that outshines |
| 01:20:36 |
- many of the radicals... |
| 01:20:39 |
we come across today. |
| 01:20:42 |
pearly, shining stars, |
| 01:20:46 |
by, say, a telescope |
| 01:20:50 |
- Hey, he's narcing on us! |
| 01:20:53 |
News team! Commence |
| 01:20:57 |
Yo, yo, yo! |
| 01:20:59 |
What in the name of Solomon? |
| 01:21:04 |
What the shit? |
| 01:21:07 |
Ooh, I'm gonna kill these punks. |
| 01:21:12 |
- News team! |
| 01:22:04 |
- Good work, team. |
| 01:22:09 |
It's just a new catch phrase |
| 01:22:13 |
No, I'd stick |
| 01:22:16 |
Whammy works. |
| 01:22:17 |
I like whammy better. |
| 01:22:21 |
I'm not a fake! |
| 01:22:23 |
Let the revolution begin! |
| 01:22:28 |
Veronica! |
| 01:22:32 |
Ron! |
| 01:22:39 |
Ah! Spiderman's balls, |
| 01:22:48 |
Oh, Mr. Burgundy, |
| 01:22:52 |
And I would not do that again. |
| 01:22:56 |
Let's be clear on that. |
| 01:22:59 |
that-- it hurts! |
| 01:23:01 |
Oh, it hurts like a bitchy-bitch. |
| 01:23:05 |
Mr. Burgundy, there are |
| 01:23:08 |
that I should |
| 01:23:10 |
I love you. |
| 01:23:45 |
- Baby, cuff me. Cuff me back up. |
| 01:23:47 |
- You're gonna get cuffed. |
| 01:23:50 |
- Oh, yeah. Oh. |
| 01:23:53 |
Oh, yeah. |
| 01:23:57 |
Ron: You're cutting off the circulation |
| 01:24:00 |
- It's hypnotic... |
| 01:24:03 |
- ...yet disgusting. |
| 01:24:06 |
- That feels good, baby. |
| 01:24:08 |
Ron: |
| 01:24:10 |
Now it's gonna get good. |
| 01:24:15 |
Veronica: |
| 01:24:18 |
Ron: |
| 01:24:29 |
- Punch me in the arm. Ooh, again! |
| 01:24:32 |
- Yes. |
| 01:24:36 |
Ron: |
| 01:24:38 |
Veronica: |
| 01:24:42 |
Oh, yes, yes, yes! |
| 01:24:44 |
- Slap it, slap me, slap me. |
| 01:24:47 |
Slap my ass, Daddy! |
| 01:24:49 |
Yes! Yes! Yes! |
| 01:24:51 |
- I'm gonna punch it now. |
| 01:24:54 |
- Ron: I wanna bite it! |
| 01:24:59 |
- I'm hungry. |
| 01:25:02 |
We don't need to see this anymore. |
| 01:25:05 |
- and get you a candle. |
| 01:25:07 |
- A nice red one. |
| 01:25:15 |
Narrator: |
| 01:25:17 |
Brian Fantana is still |
| 01:25:21 |
And recently |
| 01:25:24 |
The ceremony took place at Shutters |
| 01:25:30 |
Champ Kind |
| 01:25:33 |
since being fired |
| 01:25:36 |
He now sells those big crayon balloons |
| 01:25:40 |
And will say ''Whammy!'' |
| 01:25:44 |
and a 12-pack of Stroh's. |
| 01:25:47 |
After serving as Bush's |
| 01:25:51 |
Brick went in |
| 01:25:54 |
where he is now |
| 01:26:11 |
Mr. Burgundy, Chad Reynolds, |
| 01:26:13 |
We're doing a when-the-newsman- |
| 01:26:16 |
How would you like to report |
| 01:26:23 |
Network, huh? |
| 01:26:27 |
I'm Ron Burgundy. If you're looking |
| 01:26:31 |
you need the best journalist. |
| 01:26:33 |
And that would be |
| 01:26:39 |
- Oh no, Ron, I can't. |
| 01:26:41 |
You're the best I've ever seen, |
| 01:26:43 |
- and that's a fact. |
| 01:26:47 |
Can you feel it? |
| 01:26:49 |
This is a very, very special |
| 01:26:52 |
I've learned to accept you |
| 01:26:54 |
and I'm a much better man |
| 01:26:57 |
- Ron. |
| 01:26:59 |
- And it's happening right now. |
| 01:27:03 |
Right. |
| 01:27:06 |
Have at it, my little wild flower. |
| 01:27:21 |
I'm Veronica Corningstone |
| 01:27:25 |
Today could have been |
| 01:27:28 |
if not for the quick thinking |
| 01:27:32 |
- Veronica: Ron Burgundy. |
| 01:27:38 |
But damn it, I respect you. |
| 01:27:50 |
Narrator: Wes Mantooth is still |
| 01:27:54 |
And he still hates Ron Burgundy |
| 01:27:57 |
with an unnatural burning intensity. |
| 01:27:59 |
The Alarm Clock was jailed |
| 01:28:02 |
but, upon being released, |
| 01:28:04 |
started a little company |
| 01:28:07 |
They are now worth |
| 01:28:10 |
and own the San Jose Sharks |
| 01:28:15 |
All photos and tapes |
| 01:28:19 |
have long since been |
| 01:28:22 |
He's but a memory now |
| 01:28:25 |
But talk to one |
| 01:28:28 |
and they'll lean in |
| 01:28:31 |
Ron Burgundy |
