White Oleander

en
00:01:16 Everybody asks why I started at the end
00:01:21 The reason is simple.
00:01:23 I couldn't understand the beginning
00:01:29 There were too many pieces
00:01:33 Too much she would never tell.
00:01:37 I could sell these things.
00:01:42 But I'd set all this on fire first.
00:01:45 She'd like that.
00:01:48 She'd make it just to burn it.
00:01:54 I couldn't afford this one, but the
00:01:58 But how do I show that nothing,
00:02:02 ... not a smell, not even
00:02:06 ... has ever been as clear and sharp
00:02:11 I don't know how to express that being
00:02:16 ... was the last time that I felt safe.
00:02:55 The Santa Anas blew in hot
00:02:59 Only the oleanders thrived.
00:03:06 Maybe the wind was the reason
00:03:10 If it was, I wouldn't have known.
00:03:17 She was the most beautiful woman
00:03:21 Everybody thinks that
00:03:24 ... but she was the most beautiful woman
00:03:30 He came into our lives without warning.
00:03:34 She ignored him at first.
00:03:38 We laughed about him, his persistence.
00:03:41 "Never let a man spend the night,"
00:03:49 She was breaking all her rules.
00:04:00 What are you doing up here?
00:04:03 Come sit next to me.
00:04:07 It's the best place to feel the wind.
00:04:11 I can feel it from here.
00:04:14 No, you can't.
00:04:19 It's okay.
00:04:27 You should get some sleep.
00:04:29 I never sleep.
00:04:32 I had the most amazing idea for how to
00:04:38 I'm gonna skip work today.
00:04:43 You're still coming to parents' night,
00:04:47 Oh, God, I forgot.
00:04:51 I made plans to go to Greta's opening.
00:04:56 All the other parents go.
00:04:59 What can they tell me about you
00:05:04 Time's up! Pencils down.
00:05:10 Thank you. Time, Astrid.
00:05:14 Thank you.
00:05:18 Is your mother coming tonight?
00:05:21 No. She has other plans.
00:05:24 More important than parents' night?
00:05:27 She's an artist. She doesn't care
00:05:32 Right. And don't forget, you guys,
00:05:38 Finished my mug shots.
00:05:41 What do you think?
00:05:43 They're great.
00:05:45 No. You're not looking.
00:05:48 You can't be an artist if you don't see.
00:06:02 I don't know.
00:06:06 They're lonely.
00:06:12 It's me in the center.
00:06:15 It's our secret.
00:06:18 I won't. I never tell our secrets.
00:06:26 It's the deer-in-the-headlights look.
00:06:30 - How long has this been going on?
00:06:33 - His wife's gonna figure it out.
00:06:38 Cinema Scene.
00:06:42 It's Barry Kolker again.
00:06:47 Tell him I was killed
00:06:53 Barry, she's still out of town.
00:07:11 We don't have any eggs.
00:07:13 We never have any eggs.
00:07:22 Barry can take us out to breakfast.
00:07:25 Barry spent the night?
00:07:27 Yeah.
00:07:33 Excuse me.
00:08:16 I bet he's still out of town.
00:08:18 I called the magazine.
00:08:22 He's probably working.
00:08:25 He doesn't call when he's getting
00:08:49 I don't think you should do this.
00:08:52 He'll get mad.
00:08:53 - I'll just say we were in the neighborhood.
00:10:20 You're not my type.
00:10:29 You're not my type.
00:10:46 What happened?
00:10:47 He has a date.
00:10:50 He made love to me
00:10:55 ...because he has a date.
00:11:05 - No! Get away from me.
00:11:08 - You have no right!
00:11:11 ...for the murder of Barry Kolker.
00:11:15 I'll be back in an hour!
00:11:50 You must be Astrid? I'm Miss Martinez
00:11:56 If you need more time, I can
00:12:00 I'm not going. I'm waiting
00:12:04 Your mother won't be coming home.
00:12:26 - Any legal cause why sentence of
00:12:31 Therefore, in accordance
00:12:35 ...I sentence you to the term
00:12:40 Not less than 35 years to life
00:13:35 - Hey!
00:13:38 Well, I'm fine! How are you?
00:13:43 - Good to see you.
00:13:44 Y'all must be starving.
00:13:48 - I made enough to feed an army.
00:13:51 - How was traffic?
00:13:53 ...but it cleared up pretty fast.
00:13:57 There you go. Astrid Magnussen,
00:14:02 It is so nice to meet you, Astrid.
00:14:04 Come on in! Here, let me help you
00:14:08 - Yeah.
00:14:10 I hope you didn't bring a ton of stuff.
00:14:15 This is our home.
00:14:18 Then in here is the kitchen
00:14:21 The boys sleep here.
00:14:25 That's Davey in the glasses, and Owen.
00:14:28 This is Astrid.
00:14:30 Carolee? I said, get out here right now.
00:14:35 Let's just go in there.
00:14:40 This is Carolee, my daughter.
00:14:44 Make some room, okay?
00:14:46 This is where you'll sleep.
00:14:50 Just don't mind her. She's hormonal.
00:14:56 What about you?
00:14:57 What?
00:14:58 Have you accepted Jesus Christ
00:15:02 I don't know.
00:15:03 When you do, he'll be waiting. Okay?
00:15:06 This is where Ray and I sleep,
00:15:10 Let's go back in here.
00:15:12 Ray's home late tonight. It's poker night.
00:15:18 He acts like he's the repo man or
00:15:39 You must be the new addition.
00:15:41 I'm Ray.
00:15:44 Or Uncle Ray, but that's Starr's idea.
00:15:50 Not mine.
00:15:55 I'm Astrid.
00:15:56 It's nice to meet you, Astrid.
00:15:59 You coming in?
00:16:07 Well, how come?
00:16:09 I'm thinking.
00:16:12 Oh, what about?
00:16:19 My mother.
00:16:23 Starr was telling me about her. She's
00:16:31 Yeah, well, those things happen.
00:16:38 You come in when you're ready, okay?
00:16:48 That slut said I was grounded, like
00:16:55 Listen to that.
00:16:59 Saved by Jesus.
00:17:03 They shouldn't be doing it.
00:17:07 Reverend Daniels always blah-blahing
00:17:11 All he really wants to do
00:17:16 Don't forget to leave the window open.
00:17:20 Don't look at me like that.
00:17:22 You're no different than I am.
00:17:50 I'm gonna kill you, Ingrid!
00:17:53 I'm gonna strangle you, bitch!
00:17:57 You bloody bitch!
00:18:05 Sin is a virus.
00:18:08 It's infecting the whole country
00:18:13 We've got every excuse.
00:18:15 What's wrong if I shovel coke up my nose
00:18:21 Well, it hurts us.
00:18:27 I don't know how you swallow that.
00:18:30 "He who believeth in me, though he was
00:18:37 Here we are.
00:18:38 It's a miracle I'm not dead. They took
00:18:44 ...a cokehead. I was dancing topless.
00:18:49 Oh, Astrid, look!
00:18:51 Look at that. That is gonna go
00:18:57 I mean, I thought:
00:18:58 "Who cares if I hang my tits in a
00:19:03 You know what?
00:19:08 Astrid, those are ugly shoes.
00:19:12 Snakes don't bite above the ankle.
00:19:14 You're better off being bitten
00:19:21 We need to get her a bra. Carolee
00:19:26 You don't want them hanging
00:19:32 Carolee, will Ray love that?
00:19:39 Hurry, Astrid, it's here!
00:19:41 I told you you were gonna miss it.
00:19:44 Astrid. This one's for you.
00:19:50 Who's it from?
00:19:52 My mother.
00:19:54 I didn't think she knew where I was.
00:19:59 Dear Astrid, have you been getting
00:20:03 It's been six months.
00:20:07 It's only a few minutes
00:20:11 I can hear the women screaming
00:20:15 We're both in prison, you and I, punished
00:20:21 Don't forget who you are.
00:20:23 The best part of me is well-hidden
00:20:28 Remember it all,
00:20:43 What are you doing?
00:20:46 I'm writing a letter to my mother.
00:20:50 You ever write your dad?
00:20:52 I don't know where he is.
00:20:55 I never met him.
00:20:57 He left when I was 2.
00:20:59 - Your mother tell you much about him?
00:21:03 - Well, aren't you curious?
00:21:08 He probably thinks you're still 2.
00:21:13 - You have a son?
00:21:16 - Hey, Ray.
00:21:24 So you're going to the Jesus show?
00:21:26 - Aren't you coming?
00:21:30 In my opinion, if there's a God,
00:21:35 That sounds like
00:21:39 She wouldn't take me
00:21:42 She made me beg a ride
00:21:47 Hey, Ray.
00:21:49 Leanne, hi!
00:21:51 How you doing, Reverend?
00:21:59 Why don't you and Starr
00:22:02 'Cause I'm already married.
00:22:04 - Astrid, come on in. We're starting.
00:22:09 Where's your wife?
00:22:12 Who knows?
00:22:14 I haven't seen her or my son
00:22:33 I baptize you in the name of the Father,
00:22:38 Amen.
00:22:51 Do you believe in God now?
00:22:55 Maybe it's not such a bad thing
00:23:01 - It's better to know things.
00:23:04 What does it get you? Does it tell you
00:23:13 She didn't kill that guy alone.
00:23:17 I knew what my mother
00:23:23 I could've saved his life,
00:23:54 Come on.
00:24:08 I'm gonna kill you, Ingrid! Open the door!
00:24:12 Think there was something
00:24:16 Maybe a collection of essays
00:24:23 You bloody bitch!
00:24:26 You don't know what I can do.
00:24:30 Fill out your registration slips.
00:24:37 No number, no visit.
00:24:41 Hey, baby.
00:25:01 Astrid Magnussen?
00:25:06 Astrid?
00:25:08 Follow me.
00:25:29 Mama!
00:25:36 No, no, no, no, no.
00:25:39 Don't cry.
00:25:41 We're not like that.
00:25:51 You're so beautiful.
00:25:54 Prison agrees with me.
00:25:56 There's no hypocrisy here.
00:25:58 Kill or be killed,
00:26:04 Do they hurt you?
00:26:07 Not as much as I hurt them.
00:26:12 I won't be in here forever.
00:26:16 One day you'll look out your window
00:26:22 Your hair smells like clover.
00:26:27 I wanna remember you just like this,
00:26:35 - Starr picked it out.
00:26:42 What's that?
00:26:46 Nothing. It's just a cross.
00:26:49 I know it's a cross.
00:26:54 Why are you wearing it?
00:26:58 It's a present from Starr.
00:27:01 She force you to go to church?
00:27:04 They're really nice people.
00:27:08 To join you have to accept Christ as your
00:27:14 They call it being washed in the blood
00:27:21 Have you accepted Christ
00:27:25 - There's nothing wrong with Christians.
00:27:31 How did this happen? I raised you,
00:27:36 I raised you to think for yourself.
00:27:39 No, you didn't.
00:27:45 You raised me to think like you.
00:27:47 Maybe thinking for yourself isn't so
00:27:54 Evil? If thinking for yourself is evil,
00:28:00 Is that what you believe, now that
00:28:05 - Man's ability to reason is evil? Am I evil?
00:28:12 No.
00:28:14 But killing people who
00:28:18 We pray for your redemption.
00:28:21 Fuck my redemption. I don't want it.
00:28:25 Attention. Visiting hours are over.
00:28:31 It's good that you're trying
00:28:35 But evil is tricky.
00:28:38 Just when you think you know
00:28:43 Learning its nature takes
00:28:47 I will not lose you.
00:28:53 Those people are the enemy, Astrid.
00:28:55 - Visiting hours are over.
00:28:59 - Time's up.
00:29:00 ...at least once a week.
00:29:03 I'm the only person you know
00:29:09 - Okay?
00:29:14 Don't forget who you are, Astrid.
00:29:19 You're my daughter
00:29:55 How far away is it?
00:29:57 About a mile. Maybe two.
00:30:01 Shouldn't we pack up and go?
00:30:03 No, not yet. The wind's still in our favor.
00:30:11 My mother used to love fire season.
00:30:15 She made me decide what I'd take
00:30:20 She said if I was brave,
00:30:25 Your mother sounds tough.
00:30:27 Not like you.
00:30:30 What am I like?
00:30:33 You? You're a sweetheart.
00:30:45 Astrid, honey?
00:30:47 Astrid?
00:30:51 You come on in here a minute?
00:31:00 Well, sit down. I won't bite.
00:31:08 You having fun here, aren't you? Making
00:31:16 Little too comfortable, I'd say.
00:31:19 I might not be a genius, but I get your
00:31:24 - One what?
00:31:28 ...handling his tools.
00:31:32 We're not doing anything.
00:31:35 I'm calling Children's Services.
00:31:37 - It's all over.
00:31:39 Don't "but" me.
00:31:43 He is a man. And he sees what he sees,
00:31:47 I've got a nice thing going here.
00:31:50 Ray's the best man I ever had.
00:31:52 And I've lived too long
00:31:58 I never had a father...
00:32:00 Don't.
00:32:03 I've got myself and my kids to worry
00:32:08 I don't owe you a thing.
00:32:13 - Jesus would give me a chance.
00:32:23 He might be mad...
00:32:26 ...if he knew you sent me away
00:32:31 You're trying to make him a prisoner.
00:32:38 What do you know?
00:32:39 I know that men don't like women
00:32:44 I like you. I like the kids. I would
00:32:52 You swear you're not
00:32:55 I swear to God.
00:33:02 - There. Did you see it?
00:33:07 - See anything yet?
00:33:10 But we should be getting
00:33:12 The Quadrantid is the shortest
00:33:17 Except for the Perseids.
00:33:28 You and Starr, you having a beef?
00:33:34 No.
00:33:36 Why?
00:33:40 Just something she said.
00:33:47 I guess it's hard getting older...
00:33:51 ...pretty girl coming up in the house.
00:33:55 Ray, honey? What are
00:33:59 Nothing, baby.
00:34:10 Looking at the stars.
00:34:21 And this is $40,
00:34:23 - Forty dollars is $40.
00:34:27 - You've been doing it weekly.
00:34:30 What else are you doing
00:34:33 - You can't even look at me.
00:34:37 You weren't. And you've got
00:34:40 God knows what you spend on that.
00:34:43 That comes out of my pocket.
00:34:45 - Don't ruin this.
00:34:48 You didn't come in till 3:00
00:34:50 - I was with John.
00:34:54 And who else?
00:35:14 Thought you all were
00:35:17 I had a lot of homework.
00:35:21 - How come you aren't playing poker?
00:35:28 - They coming home soon?
00:35:35 Well, there's plenty
00:35:40 Thanks.
00:36:22 This isn't right.
00:37:14 Is everyone gone?
00:37:20 - It is my business! This is my house!
00:37:24 - Get out of my room!
00:37:28 I am not gonna get out! I waited up for
00:37:33 Don't give me your shit.
00:37:37 - I stayed up to catch you, you whore!
00:37:43 Try it again,
00:37:47 Carolee! You walk out that door,
00:37:52 Why the hell would I want to? I've been
00:37:59 Sorry, Davey.
00:38:04 Carolee.
00:38:17 You used to like it before you started
00:38:22 - You're screwing her!
00:38:24 - Screw my sponsor!
00:38:27 I should've gotten rid of her.
00:38:31 I'm gonna go in there
00:38:34 Hey, Starr. Starr. Hey! Starr!
00:38:40 - What the hell is wrong with you?
00:38:45 Starr! Starr!
00:38:50 Get off of me, goddamn it!
00:38:53 No, Ray! Goddamn it, Ray.
00:39:14 No, don't cry. We're not like that.
00:39:20 Astrid? Can you talk to me? Astrid?
00:39:25 Astrid? Can you talk to me? Astrid.
00:39:31 She's coming around. This boy saved
00:39:36 ...you'd be dead.
00:39:39 - Who shot you?
00:39:43 Hey, watch your feet.
00:39:45 - Okay, rug.
00:39:49 - Where's Ray, Davey?
00:39:57 I'm sorry.
00:40:01 Doesn't matter.
00:40:04 Bye, Astrid.
00:40:07 Okay. One step.
00:40:08 - Davey.
00:40:11 Okay, step.
00:40:18 We got her.
00:40:23 It's okay. We got you.
00:41:02 We'd prefer to find a permanent place,
00:41:07 You need special attention,
00:41:11 They have all sorts
00:41:22 You're dead, bitch!
00:41:27 Don't ever look at my boyfriend
00:41:31 You look at my boyfriend,
00:42:48 Next time you and your friends jump me,
00:43:10 - What do you want?
00:43:16 It's good.
00:43:20 Who is it?
00:43:28 - How come you chopped off your hair?
00:43:36 - You're still beautiful.
00:43:40 That's easy for you to say.
00:44:09 Look. It's the puta.
00:44:53 You're not ugly.
00:45:04 You write as if you're surprised
00:45:08 Our beauty is our power, our strength.
00:45:11 We can't allow them
00:45:16 I will never grant them that
00:45:30 So is this your first time in Mac?
00:45:35 Figured. You're so unfriendly.
00:45:40 - Life's easier without friends.
00:45:45 It's better than being in a foster home.
00:45:56 - What's that?
00:46:00 - From who?
00:46:04 - And where is she?
00:46:09 - And your father?
00:46:16 How about you?
00:46:18 They were junkies.
00:46:20 She OD'd when I was 6.
00:46:23 - I was born addicted to heroin.
00:46:27 I don't know. I was out of rehab
00:46:34 So...
00:46:38 - What's the deal? Are you gay?
00:46:41 I don't know. I get this feeling from you,
00:46:49 You're right. I'm not.
00:46:52 You think that's funny? I'm sick of this.
00:46:57 Why don't you shut up?
00:47:00 - Cut it out.
00:47:02 I'll beat your ass.
00:47:06 - Back off.
00:47:13 - What if they catch us?
00:47:17 - Hurry.
00:47:20 Come on, come on.
00:47:24 The guy's a genius.
00:47:27 I started out copying his stuff,
00:47:31 I could never touch him.
00:47:35 He's great. But you're better.
00:47:42 You're insane.
00:47:48 No, I'm not. I mean, he's a great
00:47:54 What's the difference?
00:47:56 Well, that's like asking
00:48:01 Either it's funny or it's not.
00:48:06 You are.
00:48:32 It's hard because they keep moving.
00:48:38 Don't look. I'm not done.
00:49:47 - There's another one. Do you see it?
00:49:58 The Lyrids shower is visible
00:50:02 The brightest star is Vega.
00:50:05 But you can't look right at it
00:50:09 You can trace them back to Lyra.
00:50:14 How do you know all that?
00:50:20 A kid I used to know.
00:50:34 I used to have a foster home
00:50:43 It's nice living on the beach.
00:50:52 Do you ever think about your father?
00:50:58 Not really. He was an asshole.
00:51:05 I think about mine sometimes.
00:51:10 That when I'm an artist...
00:51:12 ...he'll read about me in the papers
00:51:25 I'm not gay.
00:51:30 I know that.
00:51:58 I'll show you the one
00:52:08 It's right here.
00:52:12 They're not bad, for what they are.
00:52:16 For what they are?
00:52:20 Cartoons.
00:52:23 No, they're not.
00:52:25 They're so much more than that.
00:52:29 - Don't do it again, Astrid.
00:52:32 Attach yourself to anyone who
00:52:37 ...because you're lonely.
00:52:40 Loneliness is the human condition.
00:52:46 The best you can do is know yourself.
00:52:51 And don't let the cattle
00:52:54 You're not talking about me.
00:52:59 Sometimes I get the feeling you
00:53:04 Why wouldn't I want you to be happy?
00:53:17 - Where are they sending you?
00:53:24 Look.
00:53:30 The comic book store
00:53:33 Wherever they take you,
00:54:38 Why do we have to go
00:54:42 It isn't FDA approved.
00:54:46 - What's it called?
00:54:51 - What's it for?
00:55:01 You'll like these people. She's an actress
00:55:09 - Do they have any kids?
00:56:05 She's had an incredibly hard time.
00:56:08 She's very smart.
00:56:13 - You don't have to decide immediately.
00:56:17 Just talk to her.
00:56:20 If you're uncomfortable
00:56:38 There you are.
00:56:41 I'm really sorry Mark couldn't be here
00:56:48 Well, this is it.
00:56:52 ...because I thought that way, you know,
00:56:58 - I like the Dürer watercolor.
00:57:03 - My mother's an artist.
00:57:07 Of course. They said that. Hey, listen.
00:57:13 Or Pepsi. I bought Pepsi. I didn't know
00:57:19 I could make you a smoothie, if you like.
00:57:23 Tea is fine.
00:57:29 Okay. I look, I look. Stop. Look...
00:57:37 And now I die.
00:57:44 - You were really good.
00:57:48 I mean, you spend all this time
00:57:53 ...drag yourself to this audition.
00:57:57 ...and tell you that you're too ethnic,
00:58:03 Too ethnic?
00:58:06 It means brunette.
00:58:11 And too small, breasts.
00:58:17 - Why do you do it, then?
00:58:38 Come on!
00:58:50 - Well, here. To your first run at the beach.
00:58:56 - How's your shoulder? You okay?
00:59:00 No, you did really well.
00:59:18 What was...
00:59:20 ...the best day of your life?
00:59:29 Today.
00:59:34 - What should we do later?
00:59:39 Swim?
00:59:41 Okay.
00:59:44 Oh, my God!
00:59:47 He's back early.
00:59:55 Mark.
00:59:57 Hey.
01:00:00 Hi.
01:00:12 You must be Astrid.
01:00:15 It took us three hours to get him back.
01:00:18 The whole film crew's in there.
01:00:22 I think he thought it was gonna
01:00:27 - What would you have done if it had?
01:00:30 Come on.
01:00:33 Okay, here we go.
01:00:36 Perfect. Just, just right there.
01:00:48 - Well, cheers.
01:00:50 Cheers, Astrid.
01:00:53 So we've got some catching up to do.
01:00:56 Claire tells me you're quite an artist.
01:00:59 - Not really...
01:01:02 In fact, Tricia Day accepted Astrid
01:01:07 - At the museum?
01:01:10 You should show him.
01:01:19 They're really, really beautiful.
01:01:22 She's never even studied.
01:01:25 Is that right?
01:01:34 Is she all right?
01:01:41 - I know you're perfect.
01:01:44 Of course you are.
01:01:47 Hey.
01:01:50 - Are you okay?
01:01:58 - Are you getting my letters?
01:02:02 - I can never be sure.
01:02:09 Why doesn't she have any children?
01:02:12 She can't have them.
01:02:15 You dress like her now.
01:02:21 She takes me shopping.
01:02:26 What's her husband like?
01:02:30 He's nice.
01:02:32 He's gone a lot.
01:02:36 So you spend most
01:02:41 Yeah.
01:02:44 I'd like to meet her.
01:02:47 Why?
01:02:49 Because you don't want me to.
01:02:57 Who did this belong to?
01:03:00 That was my great aunt's
01:03:05 She was a field nurse at Ypres.
01:03:10 It's pretty, isn't it?
01:03:15 - And whose was this?
01:03:19 My father gave it to her.
01:03:25 Not at all like Mark and I.
01:03:30 I hate it when he has
01:03:35 - Why don't you go with him?
01:03:44 - I think it's because he's having an affair.
01:03:49 He loves you.
01:03:52 Yeah, I know. If he did,
01:03:57 You're just being paranoid.
01:03:59 Yeah, that's what he says.
01:04:18 - Should I put this here?
01:04:22 Everything ready inside?
01:04:30 - You're leaving tomorrow?
01:04:36 I bet Claire would
01:04:40 Coordinating our schedules is difficult.
01:04:44 She's not working.
01:04:47 What about you?
01:04:53 Yeah.
01:04:56 How is she these days, when I'm gone?
01:05:01 She's fine.
01:05:03 - Why do you ask?
01:05:27 You're back early.
01:05:31 How long has my mother
01:05:35 Not long. We've only written
01:05:40 - Why didn't you tell me?
01:05:45 Well, she thought
01:05:51 Her letter was so powerful.
01:05:56 She's so strong.
01:05:58 And God, she's talented.
01:06:05 We'd like to meet.
01:06:10 Whose idea was that?
01:06:13 Mine.
01:06:16 I bet.
01:06:20 - You know, I really love your work.
01:06:24 Astrid showed me the collages...
01:06:26 ...and some of your earlier work
01:06:30 Oh, I love the Polaroid installation.
01:06:33 Really? Why?
01:06:37 I don't know.
01:06:40 Well, because...
01:06:42 Well, because it's great.
01:06:46 - I'm actually very visual myself.
01:06:54 It must be difficult
01:06:58 It is. I spend so much time
01:07:02 ...I hardly have time to think.
01:07:07 That was a joke.
01:07:13 - Jailbird humor is hard to get sometimes.
01:07:18 So, you're an actress.
01:07:21 - So glamorous.
01:07:26 I think it's the process.
01:07:31 You're such a sensitive person, it's...
01:07:34 All that rejection has gotta be hard
01:07:38 I'm a typical Pisces, but that's
01:07:43 Scorpio and Pisces
01:07:47 You're into astrology?
01:07:49 She's not into astrology
01:07:55 Astrid and I
01:07:59 But she's become so secretive.
01:08:02 Astrid isn't secretive at all.
01:08:10 We just love her.
01:08:12 She's doing so well.
01:08:15 She's on the honor roll...
01:08:17 ...and we're just working to keep
01:08:22 Put a pyramid over her desk.
01:08:25 - My memory's fine.
01:08:29 I do practice feng shui, though.
01:08:33 You never mentioned that
01:08:35 How about your husband?
01:08:41 No, he's into frequent flier miles.
01:08:44 He's gone half the time.
01:08:47 That's not so bad, you know?
01:08:54 She must be a great comfort to you...
01:08:57 ...not being able to have children
01:09:02 Yeah. Yeah. She is.
01:09:10 Would you mind letting us
01:09:16 Grown-up things.
01:09:19 - Don't we have to go?
01:09:24 We have time.
01:09:44 Love humiliates you.
01:09:47 Hatred cradles you.
01:09:50 It's soothing.
01:09:54 What did you say to her?
01:09:57 She's having trouble
01:10:00 It's not you, is it? I know you
01:10:05 No, it's not me.
01:10:07 - You leave her alone.
01:10:11 Easy, but fun.
01:10:13 In my present situation
01:10:18 God, how can you stand
01:10:21 Did you know there's an entire order
01:10:25 She is a genuinely nice person.
01:10:31 You don't know what it's been like.
01:10:34 - If you love me, you'll help me.
01:10:41 I would rather see you in the worst kind
01:10:47 What can you possibly learn from her?
01:10:50 How to pine artistically?
01:10:53 Twenty-seven names for tears?
01:10:59 All I can say is...
01:11:04 ...keep your bags packed.
01:11:09 I don't feel like it.
01:11:12 You live here
01:11:15 - Maybe if you gave a little bit.
01:11:18 Why can't I give to her,
01:11:22 - Because I work! Because I have a job.
01:11:26 I give you everything you ask for
01:11:30 No, not everything.
01:11:33 You promised things would change.
01:11:36 - Mark, I'm trying, you know I'm trying.
01:11:41 You're falling apart.
01:11:45 It is not working out
01:11:50 You can't just send her back.
01:11:53 - Where's she gonna go?
01:11:56 You're gonna send her away?
01:12:00 - You just leave me with nothing.
01:12:05 I really almost forgot.
01:12:09 Okay, okay.
01:12:12 All right, I'll send her back, okay?
01:12:16 Just don't go, okay?
01:12:20 Unlike you, Claire, I work.
01:12:24 And she going with you,
01:12:28 I've had it with this, Claire.
01:12:32 I've really had it.
01:12:38 Astrid?
01:13:00 Astrid.
01:13:06 Astrid, please.
01:13:44 Claire?
01:13:48 Are you awake?
01:14:04 I'm sorry.
01:14:08 Are you all right?
01:14:11 Yeah.
01:14:15 Take my advice.
01:14:22 You can't send me back.
01:14:25 He's not coming back, Astrid.
01:14:29 He's gonna divorce me.
01:14:32 You know, Claire,
01:14:44 I'm cold.
01:14:48 Real cold.
01:14:52 Here. Get in here with me.
01:14:55 Come on.
01:15:04 Okay.
01:15:07 Stay with me, okay?
01:15:14 Stay with me, please.
01:15:31 Claire.
01:15:36 Claire.
01:15:59 Claire, wake up! Claire!
01:16:04 God!
01:16:13 Claire, please.
01:16:19 No!
01:16:43 Astrid.
01:17:10 What is it?
01:17:12 I'm back in Mac.
01:17:14 - Didn't they tell you?
01:17:17 Claire's dead.
01:17:19 She killed herself.
01:17:22 - I'm sorry.
01:17:26 - You poisoned her too, but with words.
01:17:32 You were just jealous.
01:17:34 Of course I was jealous.
01:17:39 ...who has a vocabulary of 25 words.
01:17:44 Why do you think they got you?
01:17:46 To create a perfect family?
01:17:50 Not teenagers recovering
01:17:52 You were on suicide watch. Don't think
01:17:57 It's just the first time
01:18:01 I'm not coming back.
01:18:04 I wanted to tell you that in person.
01:18:07 I'm gonna leave you here, alone.
01:18:13 I know you think I'm cruel.
01:18:16 I'm trying to protect you
01:18:18 Those people are not the enemy,
01:18:24 They don't hurt us.
01:18:44 You still ignoring me?
01:18:52 I turn 18 Saturday.
01:18:56 I want you to come with me.
01:18:58 I can't.
01:19:01 Sure you can. Just leave.
01:19:18 Is it your mother?
01:19:28 Come on.
01:19:30 I'll get a job. We'll find a place to live.
01:19:35 I don't wanna go to New York.
01:20:13 She was with us for three years.
01:20:18 We think you'd really like it with us.
01:20:20 There are lots of kids your age
01:20:28 Excuse me.
01:20:34 Look. Don't worry about it.
01:20:40 Let me just go talk to her, okay?
01:20:48 So, what's wrong this time?
01:20:51 I'm too old for them.
01:20:58 Look, the Greenways are great.
01:21:01 They've got a nice house
01:21:06 They go to church.
01:21:08 Schools are good.
01:21:10 They don't smoke.
01:21:17 I want her.
01:21:29 Workers of the world, arise.
01:21:35 You've got nothing to lose but Visa card,
01:21:44 Christ, Thursday.
01:21:54 - Hey, lazy cows, you want smoke?
01:21:59 Why? You don't keep it, thank God.
01:22:04 Hey, you, cheerleader.
01:22:07 Russian cigarettes. No cancer.
01:22:31 Clothes.
01:22:35 - That really is a nice color.
01:22:42 - What's it made of?
01:22:46 Why don't you just try it on
01:22:50 - It's really nice.
01:22:53 Hey, that's my dress.
01:22:57 So? You get good price for them.
01:23:03 - Melrose Place call you to be a star?
01:23:07 Even better. All profit.
01:23:10 Because it loves money
01:23:13 - Hey. You make a price, I take 25%.
01:23:19 What, you think you're gonna sell it
01:23:22 I pay for stall, storage, gas. They pay you,
01:23:30 Hey.
01:23:32 Dead person who give you thing
01:23:36 Sentimental is stupid.
01:23:42 There's no price. How about $20?
01:23:45 It's a Marc Jacobs dress.
01:23:49 - Fifty?
01:23:56 Thank you. Let's go.
01:24:02 - How was last night?
01:24:04 - Yeah?
01:24:06 - Watched TV.
01:24:10 - You know who I saw?
01:24:11 I saw Danny.
01:24:14 - Don't you think Astrid would like him?
01:24:17 Astrid?
01:24:21 - I'm Hannah. This is Julie.
01:24:24 We went to your house.
01:24:28 We visit your mother.
01:24:31 She's our project
01:24:35 - What does she want?
01:24:38 We came on our own.
01:24:40 She asked us to mail you
01:24:45 We thought we could deliver it
01:24:48 - Is that it?
01:24:54 Excuse me.
01:24:58 - What do you talk about?
01:25:03 She talks about you.
01:25:05 Really?
01:25:08 What does she say?
01:25:11 Well, that you're in a...
01:25:13 You know, fostered.
01:25:17 Look, she feels really terrible
01:25:21 So you thought you'd come out
01:25:27 You don't think she killed him,
01:25:32 Something you should know.
01:25:34 She did. I was there.
01:25:40 Oleander's poisonous.
01:25:44 - Open the door!
01:25:47 They can't keep me.
01:26:38 Who is that?
01:26:41 I don't know.
01:26:43 - You draw her all the time.
01:26:47 She's someone I remember.
01:26:55 Check it out, you guys.
01:26:58 Rodeo Drive refugee.
01:27:00 Excuse me, are you Rena Gruschenko?
01:27:03 Gruschenka. If you come from INS,
01:27:07 I have been all over this junkyard
01:27:12 You must be Astrid. I'm Susan Valeris,
01:27:21 Cigarette?
01:27:25 - Don't know why I never quit.
01:27:28 All the prisoners smoke.
01:27:32 Your mother's proud of you
01:27:35 You graduate soon. Are you making
01:27:40 Yeah. I thought I'd be
01:27:44 Really?
01:27:45 Either that or a hooker
01:27:50 Your mother said you'd be difficult.
01:27:53 - Mother knows best.
01:27:57 Three foster homes, the shooting,
01:28:02 I understand you were close.
01:28:05 Did you ask your client
01:28:08 You can't blame her for the death
01:28:13 But I do blame her, Susan.
01:28:15 That's pretty cynical, Astrid.
01:28:18 You want me to lie for her
01:28:23 Why do you hate her, Astrid?
01:28:27 Because you think
01:28:30 Or because you feel abandoned?
01:28:32 Talk to her. People do change.
01:28:37 You should hear the way she talks
01:28:43 She asked me to find out
01:28:46 Money for college? Car?
01:28:49 There's money behind her.
01:29:26 You are stupid girl.
01:29:29 You walk away from money
01:29:34 You want car?
01:29:37 You want art college?
01:29:42 You don't know anything about this,
01:29:51 - I have plan for you, anyway.
01:29:56 Niki leave soon.
01:29:59 And Yvonne is stupid girl.
01:30:01 Making third baby.
01:30:04 Every time she look at the window
01:30:08 Then she cries
01:30:13 But you, you're a special girl.
01:30:19 You stay, I make you partner.
01:30:24 Stay here?
01:30:27 What, you got better place to go?
01:30:36 Then go see mother.
01:30:38 She need something from you,
01:30:41 Go get it.
01:30:49 Here she comes.
01:30:59 Astrid, my God!
01:31:01 What's wrong, Mom?
01:31:07 I'll leave you two alone for a while.
01:31:22 So, what's the story?
01:31:28 Barry beat you? He raped me?
01:31:30 How bad does he have to be
01:31:34 I can't believe what's happened to you.
01:31:39 Who said you're getting out?
01:31:42 I said I'd talk to you.
01:31:47 Then what do you want?
01:31:49 I have a deal to make. A trade.
01:31:55 You tell me the truth,
01:32:01 - The truth about what?
01:32:05 - And if I don't?
01:32:10 I hate this look, by the way.
01:32:13 You're a Sunset Boulevard motel,
01:32:23 Why did you murder Barry?
01:32:27 If I submit to this, you'll testify?
01:32:30 Yes.
01:32:35 Self-defense. He was killing me.
01:32:40 Claire did nothing to you.
01:32:44 Claire went after herself.
01:32:51 Who was my father?
01:32:54 Why do you always ask that?
01:32:58 It's my ancient history.
01:33:02 His name was Klaus Anders.
01:33:05 - What'd he do?
01:33:10 How did you meet?
01:33:12 At Venice Beach, at a party.
01:33:18 Did you love him?
01:33:21 It was a long time ago.
01:33:24 Liar. You're exactly the same.
01:33:29 You're such a child,
01:33:33 So set me straight.
01:33:39 We had a very sexual relationship.
01:33:43 You worshipped him.
01:33:46 "Worship" isn't exactly the word
01:33:52 Who is Annie?
01:33:55 What?
01:33:56 Who is Annie, Mother?
01:34:04 She was a neighbor who took in kids,
01:34:08 - What did she look like?
01:34:16 Did she take care of me?
01:34:25 How can you possibly
01:34:35 It will only hurt you.
01:34:43 Imagine my life for a moment.
01:34:47 How unprepared I was to be
01:34:53 I was used to having time to think
01:35:00 I felt like a hostage.
01:35:03 Can you understand
01:35:20 I dropped you off
01:35:24 ...to go to the beach
01:35:28 And one thing led to another.
01:35:33 They had a place in Ensenada.
01:35:37 It was wonderful.
01:35:39 You can't imagine.
01:35:41 To take a nap in the afternoon...
01:35:44 ...to make love all day if I wanted
01:35:48 What's Astrid doing? Where's Astrid?
01:35:52 ...clinging to me like a spider.
01:35:55 At the end, I just wanted
01:36:05 How long were you gone?
01:36:10 About a year.
01:36:13 Give or take a few months.
01:36:17 - My God.
01:36:21 Don't ask me why I left.
01:36:26 You should've been sterilized.
01:36:28 I could've left you there
01:36:31 Don't you understand?
01:36:36 When I came back, you knew me.
01:36:39 You were sitting by the door.
01:36:45 It was as if you'd been waiting
01:36:48 I was always waiting for you.
01:36:52 Waiting for you.
01:36:55 Will you forget that you tied me up in
01:37:00 - Are you still waiting?
01:37:04 I stopped when Claire showed me
01:37:09 What did you think?
01:37:12 That's what babies are like, Mother.
01:37:15 Did you think we'd talk
01:37:18 I thought Klaus and I would
01:37:22 Adam and Eve in a
01:37:25 - You were in love with him.
01:37:29 I was in love with him,
01:37:32 Then why did you leave him?
01:37:35 - Why did you leave him?
01:37:42 You wanna know about your father?
01:37:45 He left us when you were
01:37:49 I never saw him again until he came
01:37:54 - He came to see me?
01:37:56 But it was too late. Why should I let
01:38:02 It wasn't about you! It was about me
01:38:06 My whole life I've wanted to see him.
01:38:12 Everything's always been about you,
01:38:17 I knew you were gonna kill Barry,
01:38:22 You didn't give a damn
01:38:27 I'll say whatever Susan wants,
01:38:30 You don't just walk away from me.
01:38:35 You don't go anywhere
01:38:39 Then let me go.
01:38:46 You look at me
01:38:52 But this is the price, Mother.
01:38:57 If I could, I'd take it all back.
01:39:02 I would.
01:39:06 Then tell me you don't
01:39:10 Tell me you don't want me like this.
01:39:18 Tell me you would sacrifice
01:39:22 ...to have me back the way I was.
01:39:37 Listen, forget it. A deal's a deal.
01:39:42 Let's just leave it at that.
01:40:06 Excuse me.
01:40:10 ...but I'm looking for someone who used
01:40:15 - You Astrid?
01:40:26 He said you'd turn up.
01:40:33 Thanks.
01:42:05 - What's going on?
01:42:13 - Excuse me. Is it a recess?
01:42:33 Don't you need me to testify?
01:42:37 Your mother told me
01:43:30 What happened?
01:43:35 She let me go.
01:43:56 Two years after Paul and I
01:43:59 ... I received a letter
01:44:02 In it was the Los Angeles Times
01:44:08 A Santa Monica gallery had mounted
01:44:12 The Times included seven pages...
01:44:14 ... of her hauntingly
01:44:20 She stares out from the cover,
01:44:26 Beautiful.
01:44:28 Dangerous.
01:44:31 Proud.
01:44:34 The Times said she was close to winning
01:44:39 They called her show a triumph.
01:44:46 It's too much to imagine her tempering
01:44:52 ... a moment for what
01:44:56 These suitcases are
01:45:01 ... a terrible country
01:45:09 Even so...
01:45:12 ... I find myself thinking of her...
01:45:16 ... wanting to feel that wind.
01:45:21 It's a secret wanting...
01:45:24 ...like a song I can't stop humming...
01:45:27 ... or loving someone
01:45:34 No matter how much
01:45:39 ... no matter how flawed she is...
01:45:43 ... I know my mother loves me.
01:49:22 [ENGLISH]