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Beetle Juice en
00:02:43	That's a big fella! Whoa!
00:03:13	- Looks great.
00:03:16	Happy vacation, honey.
00:03:19	Manchurian tung oil!
00:03:22	Helen got it for me in Oslo.
00:03:24	There's enough here
00:03:30	I wonder what this could be.
00:03:32	Oh, honey, you got it. Thank you.
00:03:34	Enough to do the entire guest room.
00:03:37	I'm so glad we're spending
00:03:39	- I'm gonna get started now.
00:03:46	- I'll get it.
00:03:53	- Maybe you should get it.
00:04:01	Oh, no!
00:04:09	Jane.
00:04:12	It's your turn, honey.
00:04:27	- Good luck, honey.
00:04:31	Hi, Barbara. I'm glad I caught you.
00:04:34	That's right. Complete vacation.
00:04:36	Today I'm $260,000!
00:04:40	- It's 6:45 in the morning.
00:04:43	From a man in New York City
00:04:46	Jane, don't send people photos
00:04:49	He wants to bring the wife and family
00:04:53	That's what we're looking for.
00:04:55	This house is too big for you.
00:05:01	I didn't mean anything.
00:05:05	- I'll see you in a few weeks. Okay?
00:05:22	I was telling Barbara about this offer
00:05:24	No, Jane.
00:05:33	Come with me to the store.
00:05:35	- What for?
00:05:39	- And I want to get a part for the model.
00:06:02	Two weeks at home. The perfect vacation.
00:06:05	Jane says we should sell the house
00:06:09	I don't think it's any of Jane's business.
00:06:12	Besides, we could try again
00:06:16	Really? What are you saying?
00:06:35	- How are you doing, Ernie?
00:06:47	Good morning, Adam.
00:06:48	- Need a haircut before your vacation?
00:06:51	- How's the model coming?
00:06:53	You know, Bozman built that foundation
00:07:07	He's got hair down
00:07:11	He says to me, "Just trim it a little."
00:07:14	- I took the scissors to him so fast...
00:07:32	- This will be great.
00:07:36	- No way. There's no place like home.
00:08:24	Perfect start to our vacation.
00:08:27	You'll feel better when you're dry.
00:08:31	That fire wasn't burning when we left.
00:08:35	- How's your arm?
00:08:56	I'll make some coffee
00:08:59	Maybe we should take things extra slow.
00:09:02	Do you remember how
00:09:06	I'm going back to that bridge
00:09:25	- You saved my...
00:09:26	- You won't believe... What?
00:09:31	- What is going on?
00:09:35	Look.
00:09:45	There's that.
00:09:47	And there's that.
00:09:56	- "Handbook for the Recently Diseased."
00:10:02	Deceased.
00:10:03	I don't know where it came from.
00:10:11	"Handbook for
00:10:14	You know what?
00:10:22	I hate this.
00:10:24	Can you give me the basics?
00:10:27	This book isn't arranged that way.
00:10:30	Why did you disappear
00:10:34	Are we halfway to heaven
00:10:36	How long will this last?
00:10:38	I don't see anything about heaven or hell.
00:10:41	This book reads like stereo instructions.
00:10:44	"Geographical and Temporal Perimeters.
00:10:46	"Functional perimeters vary from
00:10:51	This is going to take some time.
00:11:16	Damn sandworms. Thirteen percent, huh?
00:11:20	I better find a job.
00:11:29	What do we got here? The Maitlands.
00:11:34	Cute couple. Look nice and stupid, too.
00:11:44	I wish I had a better view
00:11:46	I can't tell which is
00:11:55	Cabin fever?
00:11:57	I can't clean anything properly.
00:11:59	The vacuum's in the garage
00:12:02	Why don't they tell us something?
00:12:05	Why is it just you and me?
00:12:08	Maybe this is heaven.
00:12:11	In heaven there wouldn't be dust
00:12:22	It's Jane.
00:12:27	- What's she doing here?
00:12:29	Jane, up here. Jane!
00:12:37	She can't see you, right?
00:12:42	In the book, rule number two:
00:12:48	- Won't or can't?
00:12:51	God, this book is so stupid!
00:12:56	Barb, honey...
00:12:58	...we're dead.
00:13:00	I don't think we have much
00:13:36	This is great!
00:13:45	Sorry, ma'am.
00:13:49	Delia Deetz, welcome home.
00:13:52	Charles!
00:13:54	It's okay, there's no damage. See?
00:13:59	Look at that kitchen. You'll finally
00:14:06	Come and have a look.
00:14:17	A little gasoline. Blowtorch. No problem.
00:14:21	Excuse me. Here we go.
00:14:34	We'll have to rip out all the plumbing.
00:14:37	Other than that, it's perfect. Just perfect.
00:14:41	- What do you think, honey?
00:14:48	I could live here.
00:14:50	Careful! That's my sculpture.
00:14:51	I don't mean "my" as in "I bought it."
00:14:57	Put it on the table.
00:15:07	Ten minutes. I'm already perfectly at ease.
00:15:11	It's perfect.
00:15:12	Help!
00:15:14	It's Otho.
00:15:16	Otho, why don't you come
00:15:20	It's bad luck.
00:15:21	You left the city for me. I am so happy.
00:15:24	Of course you are.
00:15:29	Let's get one thing straight.
00:15:31	We're here to enjoy the country setting,
00:15:35	Charles, you're lucky
00:15:38	...so you can afford what I'm going
00:15:42	I'm here to relax and clip coupons,
00:15:47	Then go do it quietly, dear,
00:15:49	Is the rest of the house as bad as this?
00:15:52	Is this a punishment?
00:15:55	What are we going to do?
00:15:57	We're not completely helpless.
00:16:00	I've been reading that book and there's
00:16:05	Ghosts!
00:16:07	Let's get this show on the road.
00:16:13	We're dealing with
00:16:15	There's absolutely no organic flow through.
00:16:18	I noticed that, too.
00:16:24	- What?
00:16:38	You've read my mind.
00:16:41	- I did?
00:16:44	They're not open to the experience.
00:16:55	My God!
00:16:57	We just have to pray the other closets
00:17:01	Look!
00:17:03	Ozzie and Harriet.
00:17:08	- What happened to these people?
00:17:09	Look, an indoor outhouse.
00:17:17	- Viridian.
00:17:20	Blue-green!
00:17:23	Hydrated chromic oxide.
00:17:25	Remember, I'm schooled in chemistry.
00:17:29	- What?
00:17:36	Deliver me from L.L. Bean.
00:17:41	I know what you two are up to and
00:17:44	This is not working out.
00:17:46	I will not stop living and breathing art
00:17:51	I'm here with you. I'll live with you
00:17:53	But I must express myself. If I can't
00:17:59	...I will go insane
00:18:04	Yeah. Well, maybe the house
00:18:08	But why don't you just leave
00:18:13	Okay.
00:18:19	I'll get her.
00:18:22	So?
00:18:23	Once you cover the wallpaper, knock down
00:18:27	- What's on the third floor?
00:18:30	I forgot to lock the attic door.
00:18:40	- Did you feel something?
00:18:52	- You don't have a key?
00:18:55	I have a feeling there's something
00:18:59	Yeah, the ghosts of the people who died
00:19:03	Let's do them a favor.
00:19:22	My God, that was close!
00:19:26	I cannot watch this.
00:19:28	What's the good of being a ghost
00:19:31	- Honey?
00:19:44	- You don't know what's out there.
00:19:56	Barbara!
00:19:58	Adam!
00:20:00	Adam, help. I'm getting all yellow!
00:20:44	We're trapped in this house
00:20:52	I can't believe we're eating Cantonese.
00:20:56	I plan to have a stroke from the amount
00:21:00	This is our first meal in this house,
00:21:06	Don't bait your mother.
00:21:08	When we get settled, we'll build you
00:21:12	My whole life is a darkroom.
00:21:15	One big dark room.
00:21:19	You were miserable in New York City,
00:21:24	At least someone's life
00:21:26	I'm happy here. Those people in New York
00:21:35	We could become The Summer Art Center
00:21:37	I could start sculpting again.
00:21:40	That's a very good idea.
00:21:45	First the house.
00:21:47	We should keep it the way it is.
00:21:49	Good idea.
00:21:56	The furniture truck is coming.
00:21:59	Everything goes,
00:22:20	Careful.
00:22:21	Tell me what you do and I'll tell you
00:22:26	- Isn't there an index?
00:22:31	What's this?
00:22:39	Do you know where that's going?
00:22:42	Why are there only three sculptures?
00:22:45	Where's the fourth sculpture?
00:22:47	What are you doing?
00:22:54	"Betelgeuse, the bio-exorcist.
00:22:57	"Is death a problem and not the solution?
00:23:00	"Having difficulty adjusting?
00:23:07	There's no number or instructions?
00:23:09	Nothing. The "bio-exorcist." I don't get it.
00:23:16	Straight back.
00:23:20	Why don't you take a break
00:23:44	Put that down!
00:23:46	What the hell are you doing?
00:23:48	- Listen to me!
00:23:51	Why are you doing this to me?
00:23:55	Do you think I want to die like this?
00:24:12	Hi. How are you?
00:24:22	That little girl saw us.
00:24:25	- Nobody can see us.
00:24:30	- What happened to the previous owners?
00:24:33	Yes, they were family. I was devastated.
00:24:36	- Here, take that.
00:24:38	That's a skeleton key that will open
00:24:43	You might mention I single-handedly
00:24:46	If he needs any advice in that arena
00:25:11	Don't worry. I locked the door.
00:25:31	Having trouble with the living?
00:25:35	Want to get rid of them
00:25:37	Well, come on down and see me,
00:25:41	Yes, sirree! I want to tell you,
00:25:47	I'll scare 'em real bad.
00:25:51	Hell! I'll possess myself if I gotta!
00:25:55	Yo! I got demons runnin' all through me.
00:25:58	Come on down and see it.
00:26:00	If you act now, you get a free
00:26:04	You can't beat that, can you?
00:26:06	Bring the little partners. We've got plenty
00:26:11	Say it once, say it twice,
00:26:15	"I'll eat anything you want me to eat.
00:26:19	"So, come on down, I'll chew on the dog."
00:26:50	We need some help. I read something
00:26:55	Here it is.
00:27:03	"Draw a door"? I don't know why
00:27:10	Maybe we should try that Beetle guy.
00:27:28	You didn't actually think
00:27:34	"Knock three times."
00:28:38	Birdies!
00:28:48	Get it!
00:28:50	Dad?
00:28:51	- Can't you see I'm relaxing?
00:28:55	What is the point of my coming here
00:28:59	Pumpkin, sweetheart...
00:29:02	...go help your mother.
00:29:04	Maybe you can relax in a haunted house,
00:29:12	Hmm, nice building.
00:29:14	Bad roof. Good parking.
00:29:48	- Adam?
00:30:02	You don't have an appointment.
00:30:04	- We didn't know how to make one.
00:30:07	- What do you want?
00:30:09	Already? Just bit the big one
00:30:13	What does that have to do with anything?
00:30:15	You'll use up all your help vouchers: D-90s.
00:30:19	You spend 125 years on earth
00:30:23	...during which you get only three class-one
00:30:27	You probably haven't read through
00:30:30	You'll have to wait if you don't have
00:30:33	- An appointment with whom?
00:30:41	Number 54,000,601. Ferndock!
00:31:50	- Want a cigarette?
00:31:54	I'm trying to cut down myself.
00:32:13	Adam, is this what happens when you die?
00:32:17	This is what happens when you die.
00:32:19	That is what happens when he dies.
00:32:23	It's all very personal.
00:32:26	If I knew then what I know now,
00:32:36	Maitland. Party of two.
00:32:38	Take the handbook
00:32:40	Oh, we forgot our handbook.
00:32:47	Come on.
00:32:54	All new arrivals,
00:33:00	Flight 409 is arriving at gate three.
00:33:04	How do I look?
00:33:06	- You look fine.
00:33:09	Thanks. I've been feeling a little flat.
00:33:16	Will the Peterson party
00:33:20	Peterson party, please report
00:33:25	All new arrivals,
00:33:35	125 years. I can't believe this.
00:33:38	I can't believe they didn't tell us.
00:33:43	Oh, Adam, what is this?
00:33:49	That's the Lost Souls' Room.
00:33:52	A room for ghosts
00:33:56	Poor devils.
00:33:58	That's death for the dead.
00:34:01	It's all in the handbook.
00:34:03	Keep moving.
00:34:10	Five.
00:34:12	This is the sixth door.
00:34:21	Boy, this place just gets weirder
00:34:36	We're home!
00:34:38	Look at this place! Everything's different.
00:34:43	All our furniture's gone.
00:34:46	How long do you suppose
00:34:48	Three months.
00:34:51	I'd almost given up on you.
00:34:54	I do have other clients.
00:34:57	- Are you Juno, our caseworker?
00:34:59	I evaluate individual cases and determine...
00:35:03	...if help is needed, deserved and available.
00:35:06	Are you available?
00:35:07	No.
00:35:09	- What's wrong?
00:35:13	What did you expect? You're dead!
00:35:15	We want to get rid of the people here.
00:35:19	We probably wouldn't mind sharing
00:35:23	- More like you used to be.
00:35:25	But these people!
00:35:29	Things seem quiet here.
00:35:32	You should thank God
00:35:35	The Deetzes.
00:35:37	- Have you been studying the manual?
00:35:41	The intermediate interface chapter
00:35:45	Get them out yourselves! It's your house.
00:35:49	Haunted houses aren't easy to come by.
00:35:52	- We don't quite get it.
00:35:55	Tore your faces off.
00:35:57	It's useless to pull off your heads
00:36:01	- We should start simply?
00:36:03	Do what you know.
00:36:08	You should have been studying
00:36:14	I've got to go.
00:36:16	What about that guy in the flyer, Betel...
00:36:19	Don't even say his name.
00:36:24	We might.
00:36:25	No, you don't.
00:36:30	What do you mean?
00:36:36	I didn't want to bring it up.
00:36:38	But rather than have you make
00:36:43	He was my assistant.
00:36:45	But he was a troublemaker.
00:36:48	...as a freelance bio-exorcist.
00:36:52	Claimed he could get rid of the living.
00:37:00	I believe he's been sleazing
00:37:05	The only way he can be brought back...
00:37:08	...is by calling his name three times.
00:37:12	But I strongly suggest...
00:37:14	...that you remove the Deetzes yourselves.
00:37:18	How do we contact you...
00:37:19	...if we need you again?
00:37:31	Oh, Adam, that guy's in our cemetery.
00:37:35	She's right. We just keep this simple.
00:38:02	Hey, you, come here!
00:38:05	Hungry?
00:38:07	Come on. Hey, come here.
00:38:10	I got something good for you.
00:38:13	We'll have a little bite, something to nosh.
00:38:18	- Come here!
00:38:24	Maxie, haven't I always made you money?
00:38:29	Nobody made me money like you.
00:38:34	It's just that...
00:38:36	...Winter River, Connecticut is,
00:38:39	Why would I want to invest that kind
00:38:43	...way the hell up there!
00:38:47	The people don't know the value of their
00:38:51	Then we own a whole town
00:38:54	Come and see.
00:38:56	And bring Sarah.
00:38:58	All right, Charles.
00:39:02	Just a minute.
00:39:04	Listen. Enough of this talk
00:39:08	You take it easy up there, big fellow.
00:39:10	- Good-bye.
00:39:18	Putz.
00:39:39	Lydia, is Connecticut so boring?
00:39:43	Dad's found a way of making money
00:39:49	Your mother will kill you when she sees
00:39:56	This is so corny. Is this what
00:40:00	Think of them as death shrouds.
00:40:02	And the moaning is important.
00:40:23	God, how can he stand that woman?
00:40:32	Cut it out! I'm a child, for God's sakes.
00:40:43	- I feel so stupid.
00:40:47	Do you want to spend the next 125 years
00:40:51	Moan louder.
00:41:00	Oh, God!
00:41:10	Sick. Sexual perversion.
00:41:12	Do that weird sexual stuff
00:41:22	Ah, no feet.
00:41:35	Are you the guys hiding in the attic?
00:41:38	We're ghosts!
00:41:41	- What do you look like under there?
00:41:44	I'm not scared of sheets.
00:41:47	Are you Night of the Living Dead
00:41:50	Like all bloody veins and pus?
00:41:52	- "Night of the," what?
00:41:56	If I had seen a ghost at your age,
00:41:59	You're not gross.
00:42:03	We're practicing.
00:42:04	- You can see us without the sheets?
00:42:08	How can you see us and nobody else can?
00:42:12	I read through that
00:42:16	It says, "Live people ignore
00:42:21	I myself am strange and unusual.
00:42:25	You look normal.
00:42:29	- You read our book?
00:42:31	- You could follow it?
00:42:34	- Trying to scare your mother.
00:42:37	You can't scare her.
00:42:44	You did this?
00:42:45	You carved these houses and things?
00:42:49	And this used to be your house.
00:42:52	Why do you want to scare everybody?
00:42:54	We wanted to frighten you
00:42:59	You don't know the Deetzes.
00:43:01	My father bought this place.
00:43:05	- Why don't you leave?
00:43:10	Funeral!
00:43:12	God! You guys really are dead.
00:43:17	This is amazing.
00:43:21	- I better go.
00:43:23	- Don't tell your parents we're here.
00:43:27	Tell them we are horrible...
00:43:30	...desperate, ghoulish creatures
00:43:32	...to get our house back.
00:43:37	What if this is a dream? Can you do
00:43:45	If you are real ghosts, you better get
00:43:50	...they don't work.
00:44:01	Ghosts.
00:44:03	You're telling me we have ghosts
00:44:05	Those pictures are of ghosts.
00:44:08	Ghosts!
00:44:10	Lydia, I am giving a dinner party
00:44:14	My agent, Bernard, is bringing a woman
00:44:17	In fact, no one dining here
00:44:22	I told them you were too mean to be afraid.
00:44:24	Don't you dare speak to others about me!
00:44:26	Being embarrassed in front of the few
00:44:30	So let's play family just for tonight.
00:44:38	Lydia's trying, but they don't believe her.
00:44:40	She's got photos.
00:44:43	Adam, you have a photo of Bigfoot.
00:44:46	My photo of Bigfoot is a different story.
00:44:49	We've got to get some help. We've got
00:45:08	Look.
00:45:13	It's him. Betelgeuse.
00:45:17	Betelgeuse.
00:45:20	Go ahead, Barbara, say it.
00:45:23	Betelgeuse!
00:45:29	What happened?
00:45:32	I think we're in the model.
00:45:37	Look at that.
00:46:02	Where is he? What do we do?
00:46:08	Looks like we dig.
00:46:40	It's about time!
00:46:50	- I say we open it.
00:47:12	Adam. Babs.
00:47:21	You can pick 'em! Is this
00:47:26	- Excuse me.
00:47:29	It's beautiful! You picked me.
00:47:33	It makes me want to kiss you guys!
00:47:36	I beg your pardon!
00:47:38	Let's get down to business.
00:47:40	I've got a card here somewhere.
00:47:43	- Hold that for me.
00:47:47	- There you go.
00:47:49	Possession! Learn to throw your voice.
00:47:54	No. We just want to get some people
00:47:57	I understand. In order to do that,
00:48:02	We've got to get closer.
00:48:05	Get to be real pals.
00:48:08	Save that guy for later.
00:48:10	My wife and I have some questions.
00:48:12	Sure, go ahead. Shoot.
00:48:15	What are your qualifications?
00:48:17	Well, I attended Juilliard. I'm a graduate
00:48:21	I travel extensively.
00:48:24	I've seen The Exorcist about 167 times...
00:48:27	...and it keeps getting funnier
00:48:31	Not to mention the fact
00:48:34	Now what do you think?
00:48:38	Can you be scary?
00:48:40	Oh! I know what you're asking me.
00:48:45	What do you think of this?
00:48:48	You like it?
00:48:50	- Will you excuse us, please?
00:48:54	- Let's go.
00:48:57	- We can work something ourselves.
00:49:01	- Excuse me!
00:49:03	We are leaving now.
00:49:05	Don't go yet.
00:49:07	Come on, we're simpatico.
00:49:12	Hey, hermano.
00:49:14	Yeah, there you go.
00:49:18	We're like peas in a pod.
00:49:20	You want someone out of the house.
00:49:25	Look! You've been to Saturn.
00:49:29	Whoa. Sandworms.
00:49:31	You hate 'em, right? I hate 'em myself.
00:49:34	Kids, what do I have to do
00:49:46	- Don't you hate it when that happens?
00:49:49	Come up for a while.
00:49:52	- I'm not staying.
00:49:54	We have to get out of here.
00:49:57	Home! Home! Home!
00:50:00	How did you do that?
00:50:02	Hope you like Italian.
00:50:04	Where'd you go? Hey, where'd you go?
00:50:07	Hey! You've got to work with me here.
00:50:10	I'm just trying to cut a deal.
00:50:12	Where are you?
00:50:14	You bunch of losers!
00:50:17	You're working with a professional here!
00:50:24	Nice fucking model!
00:50:26	We can do this stuff on our own.
00:50:29	Besides, I'm not exposing
00:50:32	We did call him,
00:50:35	I don't care. I've changed my mind.
00:50:40	I have an idea.
00:50:49	What you did with the place is wonderful.
00:50:52	Not me. Them.
00:50:55	So?
00:51:01	You like them.
00:51:03	I hope it wasn't yet another
00:51:07	You know what they say about people
00:51:10	In the afterlife, they become civil servants.
00:51:15	Otho, I didn't realize
00:51:18	Of course! You remember.
00:51:21	After my stint with the Living Theater...
00:51:23	...I was one of New York's
00:51:27	...until the bottom dropped out in '72.
00:51:29	Paranormal? Is that what
00:51:33	Don't mind her. She's still upset that
00:51:41	Well, this looks really good.
00:51:45	I saw some ghosts.
00:51:53	- It's a private joke Lydia and I share.
00:51:56	Yes, it is. Just today she tried
00:52:03	Kids! You know, I love them!
00:52:07	- Ghosts?
00:52:11	I'd like to propose a toast
00:52:14	...who braved the expressway
00:52:17	May your buildings go condo.
00:52:21	Lydia, favor us about your ghosts.
00:52:24	No! I am sick of that subject.
00:52:27	Delia, lighten up.
00:52:29	I would rather talk about...
00:52:46	That's cute, Delia.
00:53:00	Otho, are you doing this?
00:54:30	We did it!
00:54:33	Let's watch them scatter.
00:54:35	Any minute now they'll come
00:54:42	Any minute now.
00:54:51	It's me, Lydia.
00:54:56	They want you to come downstairs.
00:54:58	Delia says you can wear
00:55:02	It was like being in an amusement park.
00:55:05	Wham!
00:55:06	- I didn't know I could do the calypso.
00:55:10	We're dealing with Tracy and Hepburn.
00:55:13	A very sophisticated pair.
00:55:18	Charles, why didn't you tell us
00:55:22	We're not sure we want our secret out.
00:55:27	People will pay big money for this.
00:55:29	The Enquirer is offering $50,000
00:55:35	This is it, Charles.
00:55:38	- You think so?
00:55:42	She'll have him sprint up here
00:55:44	...if you can produce ghosts for her.
00:55:50	I should remind you that I'm Delia's agent.
00:55:54	I have lost money on her work for years.
00:55:56	If anything happened here, I shall handle it.
00:55:59	But not until I've seen real proof.
00:56:01	- What about this table?
00:56:05	What money?
00:56:09	Here's Lydia.
00:56:11	- Well?
00:56:21	Why not?
00:56:24	I think they were trying to scare you away,
00:56:29	They're dead.
00:56:36	All right.
00:56:43	This was not a hallucination.
00:56:47	We all experienced a super-powerful
00:56:53	Delia, you are a flake.
00:56:57	If you insist on frightening people,
00:57:02	Drive carefully!
00:57:04	- I'm dead.
00:57:06	- The attic.
00:57:09	They're ghosts.
00:57:12	They do whatever they want.
00:57:21	Fabulous! Otho Fenlock's
00:57:25	Probably committed suicide up there.
00:57:27	- I'm enchanted.
00:57:29	- They must live like animals.
00:57:32	Open this door, Dead People,
00:57:35	...and drag you out by the ropes
00:57:38	- They didn't commit suicide.
00:57:40	I can teach you something here.
00:57:44	...or people, dead or alive,
00:57:47	Open up!
00:58:00	Where are they?
00:58:02	These ghosts are nice people.
00:58:05	I think we scared them away,
00:58:09	It's the whole damn town.
00:58:12	I have never been so embarrassed.
00:58:15	Have they gone for good?
00:58:24	Dad, don't.
00:58:25	Mom, let's just go.
00:58:40	No ghosts here.
00:58:44	Come on! If they are in here,
00:58:50	We're leaving now.
00:58:55	- What are we doing?
00:59:05	Oh, boy! You guys are really spooksters,
00:59:09	Now, let's turn on the juice
00:59:16	Otho, get Maxie on the phone.
00:59:20	We can turn this place into the world's
00:59:24	An amusement park. I'll do a presentation.
00:59:27	I can't bring the ghosts. They're not here.
00:59:30	- Otho, can't you do something?
00:59:36	What type of motivation do you require?
00:59:39	Why don't you leave them alone?
01:00:31	We've come for your daughter, Chuck.
01:00:34	Stop! Stop!
01:00:47	- Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse!
01:00:52	Why are you doing this?
01:00:56	Leave me alone, all of you!
01:01:02	Great choice! We spend the next century
01:01:07	Maybe they'll leave now.
01:01:10	- He could've hurt somebody.
01:01:12	We've got them where we want them.
01:01:19	You losers! How dare you interrupt
01:01:23	I'm not fond of Charles,
01:01:25	I'm just doing my job!
01:01:29	It's okay. You know why?
01:01:31	I don't want to do business
01:01:36	The only one I think I can deal with
01:01:40	- She understands me.
01:01:55	Go ahead, make my millennium.
01:02:04	I'm feeling a little anxious,
01:02:09	It's been about 600 years.
01:02:11	I wonder where an everyday Joe
01:02:15	...can find a little action.
01:02:34	Yeah. Here I come, baby.
01:02:40	Hey, Adam, nice move!
01:02:44	- Why did you build that?
01:02:57	Will you guys shut up and leave me alone?
01:02:59	I've got all this paperwork to do.
01:03:04	You two, come in. Sit down.
01:03:06	Get in here, both of you!
01:03:11	The whorehouse was my idea.
01:03:17	You two have really screwed up.
01:03:19	I heard you allowed yourselves
01:03:23	You let Betelgeuse out
01:03:25	And you let Otho take the handbook!
01:03:28	When?
01:03:30	Never trust the living!
01:03:33	We cannot have
01:03:36	...provide proof that there is existence
01:03:40	Coach, where's the men's room?
01:03:44	I'm not your coach. He survived.
01:03:46	Let me get something straight.
01:03:48	- What's our curfew?
01:03:52	Go on, get downstairs! Men's room!
01:03:55	Are you kidding? Can't you read signs?
01:03:58	I'll be right back.
01:04:12	Maybe this was a bad idea.
01:04:14	I didn't say anything.
01:04:18	Who are we kidding?
01:04:21	Yeah?
01:04:25	This could all work out.
01:04:29	Home.
01:04:34	I'm not sure this is the right environment
01:04:36	- Snakes. Ghosts.
01:04:40	You family types.
01:04:42	You've got other things to worry about.
01:04:46	You have to sell these ghosts.
01:04:50	What are you going to do?
01:04:53	I know as much about the supernatural
01:05:05	"I am...
01:05:07	"...alone.
01:05:18	"I am...
01:05:21	"...utterly...
01:05:22	"...alone.
01:05:25	"By the time...
01:05:29	"...you read this...
01:05:31	"...I will...
01:05:33	"...be gone...
01:05:36	"...having jumped...
01:05:40	"Having plummeted...
01:05:43	"...off...
01:05:45	"...the Winter River Bridge."
01:05:50	I don't care what it takes.
01:05:53	You get the Deetzes out of there now!
01:05:57	Wait a minute.
01:06:00	What are you going to do?
01:06:03	To scare them.
01:06:05	I want to make sure
01:06:08	I'll go first.
01:06:32	Not bad. Not bad.
01:06:35	Now you.
01:06:37	Go ahead!
01:06:53	You look great.
01:06:55	Go clean house and don't forget
01:07:08	- Coach?
01:07:11	I don't think we survived that crash.
01:07:14	How did you guess?
01:07:19	Mr. And Mrs. Maitland?
01:07:26	Hello?
01:07:28	- Where are you?
01:07:32	Dead, dead, deadski.
01:07:35	Of course they're dead. They're ghosts.
01:07:37	No, I mean they're gone. Split.
01:07:42	- Deceased.
01:07:46	I'm the ghost with the most, babe.
01:07:51	You look like somebody I can relate to.
01:07:55	Maybe you could help me get out of here.
01:07:59	I gotta tell you, this death thing...
01:08:05	It's creepy.
01:08:06	Here's my problem.
01:08:08	I've got friends on the outside
01:08:12	I have to be there in person.
01:08:14	So could you help me get out of here?
01:08:18	I want to get in.
01:08:20	Why?
01:08:23	You've probably got your reasons,
01:08:27	If you could get me out, over there,
01:08:32	But to do that you've got
01:08:36	What's your name?
01:08:38	I can't tell you.
01:08:40	Why not?
01:08:42	If I tell you, you'll tell your friends,
01:08:46	I've got to go to shopping centers for
01:08:50	It makes my life hell, okay? A living hell.
01:08:54	But maybe if you have a pen...
01:08:58	- Yeah.
01:09:00	Here we go. Ready?
01:09:02	Two words.
01:09:04	Right!
01:09:07	First word, two syllables.
01:09:10	Look.
01:09:12	Turn around.
01:09:15	I don't know what your signal means.
01:09:17	Look behind you!
01:09:20	Hi. How are you?
01:09:22	Beetle.
01:09:23	Got it. Now, two.
01:09:28	Breakfast? Orange? Orange beetle?
01:09:31	Beetle fruit?
01:09:33	Beetle breakfast?
01:09:36	Beetle drink?
01:09:40	Beetle juice?
01:09:42	- That's it!
01:09:44	You said it twice.
01:09:48	It was you, wasn't it? The snake.
01:09:52	You kids and your imagination!
01:09:56	No.
01:09:59	I want to talk to Barbara.
01:10:00	You don't need to talk to Barbara!
01:10:07	Adam, I can't go through with it.
01:10:11	But it's too late.
01:10:14	No, we don't. Can't we rebel?
01:10:24	I want to be with Lydia.
01:10:37	Come on! Just say it!
01:10:41	No, don't say it!
01:10:44	Say it!
01:10:46	It's okay. It's us. What's going on?
01:10:50	Beetle...
01:10:52	He said if I let him out he would
01:10:55	No, Lydia, we're dead.
01:11:00	- I want to be dead, too.
01:11:11	Being dead doesn't make things any easier.
01:11:14	Listen to her on this.
01:11:19	And you can visit us anytime you want.
01:11:23	I have a feeling things are going
01:11:28	What do you mean, better?
01:11:30	We've decided we're going to invite
01:11:35	That's right.
01:11:42	- Can't we bring Maxie up here?
01:11:46	This is a presentation. It requires
01:11:50	- It's big. How will we get it out?
01:11:53	- Wait, there are plugs.
01:11:55	Okay, go.
01:11:58	- What's going on?
01:12:01	Be careful.
01:12:04	We've got Ed Cornwell
01:12:07	...dedicated to 50 great moments
01:12:11	You must remember Ed.
01:12:14	He's the genius who gave us
01:12:19	And D-Con is on its knees
01:12:24	...in the old hardware store.
01:12:27	We can't lose!
01:12:34	Lydia, you decided to join us.
01:12:39	Now it's time to have a stretch...
01:12:42	...and to invite our friends
01:12:46	Are they here yet?
01:12:48	Charles, we're here to see some ghosts.
01:12:53	They're not here... anymore.
01:12:59	Every time she says that, the paint peels...
01:13:02	...and some wild creature tries to kill us.
01:13:07	But we have pictures, Lydia.
01:13:09	Really. They said they'd come back
01:13:12	...if you agreed not to tease them
01:13:17	She has a tendency to overreact.
01:13:20	Don't worry, we're not relying on her.
01:13:27	- Are they still here?
01:13:30	They're still here. They're just hiding out.
01:13:34	They probably feel guilty
01:13:37	They're sorry they didn't kill you.
01:13:39	I just want to see them.
01:13:43	Otho, can you do it?
01:13:45	- It'll be tricky, but I think I can handle it.
01:13:53	What am I worried about?
01:13:59	I'll be needing
01:14:02	You'll have to go to the Goodwill.
01:14:07	Excuse me.
01:14:21	The wedding clothes.
01:14:25	The words:
01:14:34	"Hands vermilion
01:14:37	"Start of five
01:14:39	"Bright cotillion
01:14:42	"Raven's dive
01:14:44	"Nightshade's promise
01:14:46	"Spirits strive
01:14:49	"To the living,
01:15:07	Barbara?
01:15:11	"As sudden thunder pierces night
01:15:14	"As magic wonder mad affright
01:15:17	"Rives asunder man's delight
01:15:21	"Our ghost, our corpse
01:15:24	"And we rise to be"
01:15:36	Help!
01:15:45	Stop it!
01:15:49	"As flies the lizard
01:15:51	"Serpent fell
01:15:53	"As goblin vizard at the spell
01:15:57	"The buried, dead and slain rise again"
01:16:47	What's happening to them?
01:16:50	I don't know.
01:16:53	They're dying!
01:16:54	They're already dead.
01:16:58	- That's not true! Look at them!
01:17:01	Can we stop this?
01:17:05	It's too late, Charles. I'm sorry.
01:17:15	Where are you? Help them, please.
01:17:22	Sure, I can help them.
01:17:26	- What?
01:17:29	I want out for good.
01:17:34	These aren't my rules. Come to think of it,
01:17:39	Come on.
01:17:41	Think of it as a marriage of inconvenience.
01:17:44	I get out. You get the most
01:17:49	- We're even.
01:17:54	Sure.
01:18:06	Beetlejuice.
01:18:16	It's show time.
01:18:35	Attention, K-Mart shoppers:
01:18:48	I'm back. I feel real good about myself.
01:18:53	...without further delay...
01:18:56	...welcome to Winter River!
01:18:58	Museum of Natural Greed!
01:19:01	A monument to the bored businessman.
01:19:03	Come a little closer.
01:19:29	Thank you.
01:19:30	Thank you! Whew!
01:19:33	That is why I won't do
01:19:38	I won't do 'em.
01:19:39	Well, what have we got here tonight, kids?
01:19:45	We've got the Maitlands.
01:19:47	I think they've had enough exercise
01:19:57	Not so fast, Round Boy.
01:20:21	Mom, Dad:
01:20:25	I just want you two to know
01:20:28	...anytime you want to come over.
01:20:31	In the meantime, the dowry's on me, Dad.
01:20:38	The Maitlands are taken care of.
01:20:47	Shall we?
01:20:59	Called the caterer. He's got a great band.
01:21:02	We're gonna need witnesses. Would you?
01:21:55	Let's get on with the ceremony.
01:21:57	Do you, Betel...
01:22:00	- Nobody says the "B" word.
01:22:05	...to be your wedded wife?
01:22:08	I don't know. It's a big decision.
01:22:10	I always said if I ever did it,
01:22:15	Sure. Go ahead.
01:22:17	And do you, Lydia, take this man...
01:22:20	No! Betel...
01:22:23	She's a little nervous.
01:22:27	I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind.
01:22:29	The man next to me is the one I want.
01:22:31	I'm answering.
01:22:35	Come on.
01:22:40	Come on.
01:22:43	Betelgeu...
01:22:50	Scram!
01:22:53	Come on!
01:22:56	Hey, guy.
01:23:00	May we continue with the ceremony?
01:23:05	- Then by...
01:23:17	Strike!
01:23:22	Let's roll!
01:23:23	Then by the authority vested in me...
01:23:27	- The ring, please.
01:23:37	I've got it, honey.
01:23:55	Here it is. Here you go.
01:23:58	She meant nothing to me. Nothing at all!
01:24:07	- I now pronounce you...
01:24:11	Man and...
01:25:12	- What time is it?
01:25:16	Give or take a year.
01:25:24	Well?
01:25:27	Did you get the paints?
01:25:28	Yes. And I took pictures
01:25:32	How was the science test?
01:25:34	It was gross.
01:25:37	I told them "no way." I said it was
01:25:40	And the math test?
01:25:44	You're kidding me? We spent
01:25:48	I got an "A."
01:25:50	So, can I?
01:25:52	I don't know.
01:25:57	Don't tease her.
01:26:05	Come on.
01:26:08	Well...
01:26:10	...I suppose.
01:26:28	This reads like stereo instructions.
01:26:30	Sounds like Lydia got an "A"
01:26:35	He likes it.
01:27:17	Sorry. Didn't see you sitting there.
01:27:21	Women.
01:27:24	I don't know what her problem is.
01:27:27	Normally, chicks...
01:27:43	Pardon me. Did you do that?
01:27:45	Nice work.
01:27:47	How do you get them so small?
01:27:49	There goes Elvis! Yo, King!
01:27:54	Well, looks like I'm next.
01:27:58	Good thing. I've got to do a photo shoot
01:28:03	They've been after me for months.
01:28:09	What are you doing? Stop it.
01:28:12	Come on! Whoa! Stop it!
01:28:18	This might be a good look for me.
01:31:42	Subtitles conformed by SOFTITLER

Beetle Juice