Benchwarmers The
|
00:00:51 |
- Throw it here. |
00:00:55 |
- Yeah! You almost had it! |
00:00:57 |
Strike three! |
00:01:14 |
- Here you go. There it is. |
00:01:28 |
- Dang it. |
00:01:30 |
I got a ladder. I'll get it. |
00:01:32 |
Just tell Mrs. Donnelly it's on the roof. |
00:01:36 |
That's good thinking, Clark. |
00:01:37 |
I'll just have 80-year-old |
00:01:41 |
Okay, cool. Thanks. |
00:01:44 |
Clark. Hey. |
00:01:45 |
I was kidding. You can't do that. |
00:01:48 |
All right, fine. |
00:01:49 |
Here, give her one of these. |
00:01:52 |
- This is yesterday's paper. |
00:01:56 |
Clark, don't pick your nose |
00:01:58 |
I'm not picking, I'm scratching. |
00:02:00 |
What are you scratching, |
00:02:02 |
Yeah, because it's huge. |
00:02:07 |
Chain break! Not now! |
00:02:11 |
Can you fix it? |
00:02:14 |
- Gus, what should I do with this? |
00:02:22 |
Nelson leans in and gets his sign. |
00:02:24 |
Here comes a fastball. |
00:02:27 |
Swing and a huge miss |
00:02:31 |
Hey, losers. We have a practice |
00:02:35 |
- I thought your practice was at 4:30. |
00:02:37 |
We wanna have a practice |
00:02:40 |
- Oh, okay. Can we hit with you? |
00:02:43 |
Why don't you go home |
00:02:48 |
Look, there's room for all of us. |
00:02:52 |
Listen, we have a game tomorrow... |
00:02:55 |
...and there's only one field |
00:02:57 |
So beat it! |
00:03:01 |
Maybe this is a sign |
00:03:03 |
My mother said I should hold off |
00:03:06 |
You know, just to make sure |
00:03:11 |
- Stop! |
00:03:12 |
Troy, I think he wants |
00:03:15 |
- Beef stew! Beef stew! |
00:03:17 |
Beef stew! Beef stew! Beef stew! |
00:03:20 |
No, no, no. |
00:03:22 |
No, stop it. |
00:03:29 |
Hey! Get off him! |
00:03:31 |
Later, fart face. |
00:03:34 |
Yeah, you better run! |
00:03:41 |
- Are you all right? |
00:03:44 |
Need us to call your parents |
00:03:46 |
It actually... |
00:03:48 |
...didn't taste as bad as you'd think. |
00:03:54 |
Nelson, wait! |
00:03:58 |
Oh, I love beef stew. |
00:04:01 |
Why do kids have to be |
00:04:10 |
You know, I haven't been on |
00:04:14 |
I've never even been on a field. |
00:04:16 |
If I tried, the kids in my neighborhood |
00:04:20 |
That's awful, Clark. |
00:04:22 |
Baseball is America's pastime. |
00:04:24 |
That's like saying |
00:04:28 |
You've never had apple pie? |
00:04:30 |
Well, my mom said |
00:04:32 |
That's ridiculous. |
00:04:35 |
Diarrhea? |
00:04:37 |
No. Baseball. It's the best. |
00:04:40 |
Let's come back here later |
00:04:43 |
Can I bring Richie? |
00:04:46 |
- Yeah, bring Richie. Let's say 4:00. |
00:04:50 |
Hold on. My mom's sending me |
00:04:54 |
No way! |
00:04:56 |
We're having macaroni tonight! |
00:04:59 |
Awesome! |
00:05:04 |
- Excuse me. |
00:05:07 |
I rented this |
00:05:08 |
It's nothing but a lame story |
00:05:11 |
And you didn't like it? |
00:05:13 |
I watched it with my parents. |
00:05:15 |
- Come on, it's kind of hot. |
00:05:18 |
All right, I'm sorry. |
00:05:20 |
I'll recommend this: |
00:05:23 |
- It's actually a pretty decent film. |
00:05:27 |
- I think there's two. |
00:05:31 |
- Hey, Richie, are you off yet? |
00:05:35 |
I don't get to work for an hour a day |
00:05:38 |
Gus wants us to |
00:05:41 |
Clark, we don't play baseball. |
00:05:43 |
I told Gus we'd be there, Richie. |
00:05:46 |
And if we don't go, |
00:05:48 |
And that's not what I'm about. |
00:05:52 |
All right, Daytime Emmy. |
00:05:54 |
Hey, Marty, I'm gonna split early, |
00:05:57 |
I don't even know who you are. |
00:06:00 |
Bros before ho's, dude. |
00:06:06 |
Liz, honey, do you know |
00:06:09 |
No. Gus, if we conceive this month, |
00:06:13 |
It would be fun to have |
00:06:15 |
I can't find it. |
00:06:17 |
January also has a higher |
00:06:21 |
I found it. I found it. |
00:06:24 |
I found my mitt, Liz. |
00:06:27 |
Be serious. This is important. |
00:06:30 |
All right, honey, I love you. |
00:06:33 |
Remember, Gus, 6:00. |
00:06:38 |
Gotta keep your eye on the ball. |
00:06:40 |
You just think of that? |
00:06:44 |
Just focus, you'll be fine. |
00:06:47 |
With this vest, it's hard to swing. |
00:06:51 |
Quit picking your nose, Clark. |
00:07:04 |
You just lost your membership |
00:07:07 |
Dang it. |
00:07:08 |
Hey, mister, |
00:07:11 |
You were the ones |
00:07:13 |
So? You douche bags |
00:07:16 |
- Where's your coach? |
00:07:18 |
We have practice here, |
00:07:21 |
Hey, well, no coach, no field. Sorry. |
00:07:24 |
Leave our field, |
00:07:27 |
What is this, Children of the Corn? |
00:07:29 |
I'm gonna call the cops. |
00:07:30 |
We are cops. We're Navy SEALs. |
00:07:33 |
- Navy SEALs aren't cops. |
00:07:37 |
I'm undercover. |
00:07:38 |
All right, you cocky jerks, you want |
00:07:42 |
But there are nine of us |
00:07:46 |
So you should beat us no problem. |
00:07:47 |
- What, are you scared? |
00:07:49 |
Yeah, chicken. |
00:07:52 |
I'm gonna go ask our team. |
00:07:54 |
This is a bad idea. They look tough. |
00:07:56 |
I saw that demon boy laying beef |
00:08:01 |
Clark used to get beef |
00:08:04 |
- Oh, and you didn't? |
00:08:08 |
It's cooler. |
00:08:10 |
- We'll do it. |
00:08:12 |
Makers of what? Poop? |
00:08:18 |
Coming down! |
00:08:21 |
- Balls in. |
00:08:23 |
- Get your position down. |
00:08:31 |
- Strike! |
00:08:33 |
Don't swing if it's not |
00:08:35 |
- Where's the strike zone? |
00:08:37 |
Right there. |
00:08:42 |
- Strike three. |
00:08:46 |
- What a loser. |
00:08:48 |
- That kid's throwing heat. |
00:08:51 |
One out! |
00:08:53 |
Gonna be two outs! |
00:08:54 |
Hey, I bet you're a real good catcher. |
00:09:01 |
- Strike! |
00:09:02 |
- It's not a sword. |
00:09:05 |
- Come on. |
00:09:07 |
- Oh, that's ugly, man. |
00:09:10 |
Come on, now. |
00:09:14 |
- Strike three! |
00:09:18 |
- But I ticked it. It hit the bat. |
00:09:20 |
You're still fat. I ticked it! |
00:09:23 |
- I ticked it. Gus, you see that? |
00:09:27 |
You know what? I was trying |
00:09:30 |
...and throw them off, |
00:09:33 |
- What dog? |
00:09:35 |
It's cool now. All right, go, Gus. |
00:09:39 |
- Strike him out quick! |
00:09:41 |
- Move in. |
00:09:44 |
- Guy's got nothing. |
00:09:51 |
All right, Gus! Awesome! |
00:09:54 |
All right! Yeah! |
00:10:00 |
- He just did that steroid-free. |
00:10:02 |
Something that makes |
00:10:05 |
- There must be steroids in macaroni. |
00:10:09 |
Yeah! |
00:10:12 |
Nice! |
00:10:21 |
- Here we go. |
00:10:22 |
Batter up! |
00:10:32 |
Strike! |
00:10:35 |
Not so fast! |
00:10:36 |
You're supposed to catch it |
00:10:39 |
Yeah! |
00:10:40 |
I don't need lip from you, |
00:10:43 |
- We're still in this thing. |
00:10:47 |
You're out! |
00:10:50 |
You're out! |
00:10:52 |
Strike three, you're out! |
00:10:53 |
- Come on, Troy. Let's go, Troy. |
00:10:58 |
- Yes! |
00:11:08 |
It's over! |
00:11:11 |
Three, you're out! |
00:11:13 |
Sorry. Shoot. |
00:11:16 |
- Yeah, smack it in the butt. |
00:11:19 |
I'm gonna keep this one in play. |
00:11:24 |
What an idiot. |
00:11:27 |
Strike him out. Strike this loser... |
00:11:31 |
Come on, Kyle, are you okay? |
00:11:33 |
- What happened? |
00:11:35 |
- Hey, get him up. |
00:11:38 |
- Ball's still alive, chumps. |
00:11:43 |
Should somebody call 411? |
00:11:45 |
He's fine. |
00:11:47 |
What's that noise? |
00:11:54 |
- Get him! Get him! |
00:11:57 |
I think he just got the wind |
00:12:04 |
Gus, why didn't you play in |
00:12:07 |
The whole bully thing, and jocks. |
00:12:11 |
Those butts! You could've gone |
00:12:14 |
Yeah, that's the past. |
00:12:15 |
- Hey, Richie, where's your brother? |
00:12:19 |
Is he still dealing with agoraphobia? |
00:12:21 |
Yeah, dude, he hasn't left the house |
00:12:25 |
There he is. |
00:12:26 |
- Hey, Howie. |
00:12:29 |
Hey, guys. |
00:12:31 |
We played an actual game |
00:12:35 |
All these punk teenagers are like, |
00:12:38 |
We're like, "We'll play you for it." |
00:12:41 |
- I hit a foul, dude, it was sweet. |
00:12:45 |
You gotta videotape it next time |
00:12:47 |
- Buddy, just come with us. |
00:12:50 |
It's not that scary. And you could use |
00:12:53 |
Outside, bad. The sun, scary. |
00:12:56 |
He's not my friend. |
00:13:00 |
- I know. Sun, bad. You, cuckoo. |
00:13:03 |
You know the best part about |
00:13:06 |
- What's that? |
00:13:09 |
Richie? |
00:13:12 |
Oh, yeah. Okay, buddy. |
00:13:16 |
- Is that apple juice? |
00:13:20 |
Honestly, you have |
00:13:23 |
You could be a terrific ball player. |
00:13:25 |
When you throw it to me, |
00:13:27 |
Not with my face, but with a glove. |
00:13:30 |
I am starting to get the fever. |
00:13:35 |
Dude, this chick is so hot. |
00:13:39 |
What's going on? |
00:13:41 |
Nothing. Just refilling the bar. |
00:13:44 |
I love salad. |
00:13:46 |
Yeah, it's... |
00:13:47 |
...good and good for you. |
00:13:51 |
I love salad. |
00:13:58 |
That was some Barry White shit. |
00:14:00 |
Yeah, I work it when I have to. |
00:14:02 |
- How's "Ms. Pac-Man" treating you? |
00:14:07 |
Yeah, that's them, Uncle Jerry. |
00:14:10 |
Richie Goodman and Clark Reedy? |
00:14:13 |
What were you losers doing |
00:14:16 |
- Clark was. I was home. |
00:14:18 |
We were just hitting balls. These kids |
00:14:22 |
That is priceless. |
00:14:24 |
Clork the Dork and Richie Bitchy |
00:14:27 |
- Why is that so funny? |
00:14:31 |
They should stick to what they know: |
00:14:35 |
You, stay away from my field... |
00:14:38 |
...or I'll have my 12-year-old nephew |
00:14:42 |
Nice meeting you, Fairy Jerry. |
00:14:46 |
- What was that? |
00:14:49 |
I thought I'd give you one. |
00:14:53 |
- Oh, really? |
00:14:55 |
Okay, Gus. |
00:14:58 |
Gus... |
00:14:59 |
- Gus Bus. |
00:15:03 |
That's you. Gus Bus. |
00:15:06 |
Wow, that was a brutal comeback. |
00:15:08 |
Let's go, guys. I don't think |
00:15:11 |
Man. |
00:15:13 |
You stay off my field. |
00:15:15 |
Stay away from the fairy dust, Jerry. |
00:15:19 |
- "Gus Bus"? |
00:15:22 |
It was the coolest, Gus. |
00:15:24 |
Never seen anybody stand up |
00:15:26 |
I knew guys like that where I grew up. |
00:15:29 |
I just wanted to say... |
00:15:31 |
...that was great, the way |
00:15:35 |
That was no big deal. |
00:15:36 |
Well, unfortunately for all of us... |
00:15:38 |
...Jerry's in charge of |
00:15:42 |
Hey. Are you the kid |
00:15:45 |
Yes. This is my son Nelson. |
00:15:47 |
He's become the fart magnet |
00:15:50 |
I also get a healthy smear |
00:15:54 |
When I was your age, Fairy Jerry |
00:15:57 |
His son just did that to me |
00:16:00 |
I tried to talk to Jerry. He just laughed |
00:16:03 |
Guys like that don't realize |
00:16:06 |
I couldn't agree more. |
00:16:17 |
By the way, thanks for hitting |
00:16:20 |
...then letting me rip one |
00:16:23 |
It was one of the best days |
00:16:26 |
This car is so radical. |
00:16:28 |
Looks just like K.I.T.T. |
00:16:31 |
It is K.I.T.T. From Knight Rider. |
00:16:35 |
Watch this. |
00:16:36 |
Allow me to introduce myself. |
00:16:41 |
Who are you? |
00:16:44 |
I'm just one of those nerds |
00:16:47 |
...to make billions. |
00:16:50 |
Maybe I'll see you guys |
00:16:52 |
It was a pleasure to meet you all. |
00:16:54 |
Easy, Mel. |
00:17:03 |
I have yet to perfect the peel-out. |
00:17:06 |
- It was fine. |
00:17:08 |
- Yeah. |
00:17:10 |
Try not to destroy me |
00:17:19 |
Hey, honey, I'm home. |
00:17:22 |
- Where have you been? |
00:17:25 |
I am on an ovulating schedule. |
00:17:30 |
I thought you meant |
00:17:32 |
Did you mean |
00:17:34 |
- Why would you think that? |
00:17:37 |
Don't you ovulate |
00:17:40 |
Gus, that's just weird. |
00:17:41 |
So from now on, |
00:17:45 |
Pacific Standard Time. |
00:17:52 |
Check out this mitt. It's all black. |
00:17:54 |
I look like a Borack warrior |
00:18:01 |
Well, get a load of Mega Mitt. |
00:18:08 |
Hey! Hey! What the...? |
00:18:10 |
Watch it! |
00:18:12 |
Clark? Richie? |
00:18:14 |
I hardly recognize you clowns |
00:18:17 |
Brad. You have really |
00:18:20 |
Oh, eat me. |
00:18:22 |
So I heard from Jerry you tools |
00:18:25 |
I didn't know "athlete" |
00:18:28 |
That's "ama-za-zing." |
00:18:31 |
You think you're hot shit |
00:18:34 |
Why don't you be a stud |
00:18:37 |
Or "register-er." |
00:18:40 |
My team practices today at 5. |
00:18:46 |
You can't handle the truth! |
00:18:48 |
- Bring it! |
00:18:57 |
Gus! |
00:18:59 |
Gus! |
00:19:01 |
He can't hear us. |
00:19:10 |
Hey, fellas. |
00:19:13 |
- You okay, Richie? |
00:19:17 |
We just had a run-in with one of our |
00:19:21 |
- What happened? |
00:19:23 |
...and he challenged us to a game. |
00:19:25 |
- I don't know if you can leave work. |
00:19:27 |
I'll mow this later. |
00:19:30 |
I think I'm gonna puke. |
00:19:33 |
Bobby, this one's coming for you. |
00:19:37 |
Let's go! |
00:19:40 |
Thattaway. Good job. |
00:19:43 |
Looks like the Three Muske-queers |
00:19:46 |
Everybody, get your butts in here. |
00:19:49 |
Yeah, we got a "scrim-im-age." |
00:19:54 |
How the hell will this work |
00:19:56 |
We got a pitcher, a catcher, |
00:19:58 |
No, you've got a retarded paperboy, |
00:20:02 |
...and a smelly midget. |
00:20:03 |
You wanna dance? |
00:20:06 |
Dance? We'll beat your ass. |
00:20:08 |
- Death to you. |
00:20:13 |
My wife's the only one |
00:20:17 |
I just know you guys better... |
00:20:23 |
Gus is the new Jet Li. |
00:20:25 |
Bring it on! |
00:20:27 |
Hey, Dad, come down |
00:20:31 |
Strike one! |
00:20:33 |
Strike two! |
00:20:35 |
Strike three! |
00:20:37 |
- Hey! |
00:20:40 |
Strike three! |
00:20:42 |
Hey! What are you laughing at? |
00:20:44 |
He told me a joke. |
00:20:49 |
- Let's go, Richie! |
00:20:51 |
Hey, Dad, come here. Look. |
00:20:54 |
Might wanna throw a fielder |
00:21:00 |
- What you got? |
00:21:02 |
Pulled something. Used to run track. |
00:21:05 |
Come on, Richie. |
00:21:06 |
- Strike two! |
00:21:12 |
Strike three! |
00:21:15 |
Could you tell him to slow it down? |
00:21:19 |
Did you tell him? |
00:21:25 |
- Here you go, Clark. |
00:21:27 |
You're welcome. |
00:21:33 |
Home run! |
00:21:36 |
Yeah! Yeah, did you see that? |
00:21:39 |
All right! You hit another homer! |
00:21:42 |
Howie! He just hit a home run! |
00:21:55 |
Strike one! Strike two! Strike three! |
00:21:58 |
Can I get you a tennis racket? |
00:22:01 |
No! |
00:22:11 |
Bravo, gentlemen. Bravo. |
00:22:13 |
- Great game. |
00:22:15 |
Say, guys, I have this sensational idea |
00:22:19 |
Are you free for lunch tomorrow? |
00:22:21 |
I usually take lunch from 12 to 4:30, |
00:22:26 |
Tomorrow is egg salad day... |
00:22:28 |
...but I guess I could |
00:22:31 |
Gus, what do you think? |
00:22:32 |
- One sounds good. |
00:22:34 |
I'm at 501 Shmegmer Street. |
00:22:37 |
- See you then. |
00:22:39 |
- Bye. Bye, guys. |
00:22:42 |
- Dude, you're in trouble. |
00:22:44 |
You're definitely busted. |
00:22:46 |
I didn't do anything. I swear! |
00:22:56 |
- This is it? |
00:22:58 |
I just thought it was Clay Aiken |
00:23:01 |
- Who goes there? |
00:23:04 |
It's Gus, Clark and Richie. |
00:23:06 |
- You may enter. |
00:23:08 |
"Thanks, Darth." |
00:23:10 |
- This place is sick, yo. |
00:23:14 |
Two zillion, actually. |
00:23:16 |
Hey, Mel. This place is incredible. |
00:23:19 |
Thank you, Gus. Gentlemen, |
00:23:22 |
Shall we adjourn |
00:23:26 |
Gentlemen, make yourselves |
00:23:30 |
Yoda! R2! |
00:23:34 |
Number 7! |
00:23:40 |
Lunch is ready when you are, |
00:23:42 |
- Hey, Number 7. |
00:23:45 |
Gentlemen, let's eat. |
00:23:51 |
Gentlemen, order any kind |
00:23:53 |
Number 7, thank you. |
00:23:55 |
I'll have a peanut-butter-and-jelly |
00:24:06 |
Can I have tuna fish and Skittles... |
00:24:09 |
...and pudding skin on wheat, |
00:24:13 |
I guess so. |
00:24:19 |
That was radical! |
00:24:22 |
All right, I got a crazy one for you, |
00:24:24 |
I'd like a turkey on white... |
00:24:28 |
He's good. |
00:24:30 |
So, what's on your mind, Mel? |
00:24:31 |
Gentlemen, it is time we brought |
00:24:35 |
- What cause? |
00:24:39 |
...the kids who warm the bench while |
00:24:43 |
All of us here in this room have been |
00:24:48 |
...and now our kids are going through |
00:24:51 |
- Now, Richie, do you have any kids? |
00:24:55 |
- Clark? |
00:25:01 |
- Gus? |
00:25:05 |
Well, when you do have them... |
00:25:07 |
...you will know how painful it is |
00:25:11 |
- Bonjour, dudes. |
00:25:13 |
- How's it going? |
00:25:15 |
Son, you have a little smear |
00:25:21 |
From a dog or a cat? |
00:25:25 |
I think it's a goat. |
00:25:27 |
Number 7, |
00:25:36 |
Thanks, Number 7. |
00:25:38 |
As you are mine, Nelson. |
00:25:40 |
That's so cool. |
00:25:45 |
Now, this is why I wanna start |
00:25:48 |
...with you incredible men against all |
00:25:54 |
But why us three? |
00:25:56 |
Because you know what it feels like |
00:25:59 |
You're three grown men |
00:26:02 |
...because you were weird |
00:26:07 |
Okay, the last one was just me. |
00:26:10 |
But why would any of these teams |
00:26:17 |
For the prize. |
00:26:27 |
- That's incredible! |
00:26:29 |
An official-size stadium, |
00:26:31 |
...after all the greatest ballparks |
00:26:34 |
Like Wrigley, Fenway |
00:26:36 |
Nelson and his buddies have set up |
00:26:40 |
You can go on Nerdly. Net, |
00:26:44 |
...or Please-stop-with-the-shit-tossing- |
00:26:47 |
Why don't you just build a stadium |
00:26:50 |
...and keep everybody else out? |
00:26:53 |
Yeah, Clark. |
00:26:55 |
If we can beat them |
00:26:57 |
...then kids like Nelson |
00:27:02 |
We'll do it. Come on. |
00:27:04 |
Benchwarmers on three. |
00:27:08 |
Benchwarmers! |
00:27:09 |
Can I get a napkin? |
00:27:11 |
On the counter. |
00:27:14 |
Excuse me, sir. |
00:27:18 |
Sorry. I spit a lot when I speak. |
00:27:22 |
People spit. I mean, I spit |
00:27:27 |
My name is Sammy. |
00:27:30 |
Pleased to meet you, Sammy. |
00:27:34 |
Hey, if I come to a game... |
00:27:36 |
...can I be your scorekeeper |
00:27:38 |
- Certainly. |
00:27:41 |
- All right. See you later, Sammy. |
00:27:44 |
All right. |
00:27:47 |
Who was that boy? |
00:27:48 |
I'm just seeing if he might be |
00:27:52 |
- Why are you spitting on me? |
00:27:58 |
This is idiotic. |
00:27:59 |
Are these guys serious about |
00:28:02 |
- It sounds like it. |
00:28:06 |
If there weren't nerds in the world, |
00:28:09 |
No doubt. But what if we don't play, |
00:28:13 |
They'll probably build |
00:28:15 |
...and fly it to Planet Booger |
00:28:21 |
Now, guys, |
00:28:23 |
They're as good as done. |
00:28:25 |
You know what? You're right. |
00:28:27 |
Let's strap it on, and beat these three |
00:28:31 |
Let's get it on! |
00:28:38 |
This green one is sweet. |
00:28:41 |
We have a crowd, you guys. |
00:28:43 |
Excellent! |
00:28:45 |
- Crap! What is she doing here? |
00:28:47 |
- It's that salad chick from Pizza Hut. |
00:28:50 |
- Hey, she's with me. |
00:28:53 |
Good afternoon, gentlemen. |
00:28:55 |
I just destroyed that Porta-Potty, |
00:28:58 |
Who did this? |
00:29:03 |
Sorry! |
00:29:05 |
Listen, I got a gift for you. |
00:29:08 |
I never had my own uniform before. |
00:29:10 |
We can't have a team |
00:29:12 |
I'm never taking this off. |
00:29:16 |
This is the first game of |
00:29:20 |
Nelson, you showed some serious |
00:29:23 |
What do you say about being |
00:29:29 |
- That means yes! |
00:29:31 |
Come on! What are we waiting for? |
00:29:36 |
I had hair on my ass |
00:29:40 |
This is it, kids. |
00:29:41 |
The Benchwarmers' quest |
00:29:44 |
- Karl's! |
00:29:47 |
... have taken the field in our Internet |
00:29:52 |
First to bat, Richie Goodman. |
00:29:54 |
Fingers crossed. |
00:29:56 |
- Come on, Richie. |
00:29:59 |
The pitcher pitches... |
00:30:00 |
Strike! |
00:30:02 |
I ticked it. |
00:30:06 |
I ticked it again. |
00:30:10 |
Strike! |
00:30:12 |
Nice try, son. |
00:30:14 |
- Just fouled two in front of salad girl. |
00:30:17 |
Next up to bat, Clark Reedy. |
00:30:20 |
All right, Clark. Here we go. |
00:30:28 |
Those squirrels are definitely out. |
00:30:37 |
That's my Miata! Kill him! |
00:30:42 |
Hey, break it up! |
00:30:44 |
Why is this happening? |
00:30:47 |
Come on! Snap his femur! |
00:30:49 |
Richie, help me! |
00:30:51 |
Help me! |
00:30:53 |
Mommy! |
00:30:55 |
Come on, Gus. |
00:30:56 |
- We need it. |
00:31:07 |
- Home run! |
00:31:17 |
Strike! |
00:31:22 |
Strike! |
00:31:32 |
Another one! |
00:31:34 |
Oh, my God! |
00:31:37 |
Strike! |
00:31:39 |
Strike! |
00:31:47 |
Gus Bus! Gus Bus! Gus Bus! |
00:31:51 |
This can't just be about me. |
00:31:55 |
- Look alive, Clark! |
00:31:58 |
No, we need you, buddy. |
00:32:00 |
No, you don't. I'm awful. |
00:32:02 |
Come on, now. |
00:32:04 |
Let's go, Tommy! |
00:32:05 |
This one's coming |
00:32:12 |
It's up, Clark! Clark! |
00:32:14 |
Clark, look out! |
00:32:20 |
Attaboy! Good job! |
00:32:22 |
All right! Good throw! |
00:32:24 |
Use your mitt, son, not your head! |
00:32:32 |
Get it in here, pal! Get it in here. |
00:32:34 |
Hold, hold, hold. Good job. |
00:32:38 |
Gus, come on. Let's end this. |
00:32:40 |
Two outs. Strike this kid out, |
00:32:44 |
A home run here would tie it up... |
00:32:46 |
...and knock the Benchwarmers |
00:32:51 |
There we go! Nice! Go! Run! |
00:32:53 |
Make the play, Clark! |
00:32:55 |
Clark, go! |
00:33:00 |
Pick up the ball! |
00:33:02 |
Run! Go, go, go! |
00:33:07 |
Richie! Incoming! |
00:33:09 |
What did you say? |
00:33:11 |
- There we go! Nice! Go! |
00:33:14 |
The ball? |
00:33:19 |
Behind you! |
00:33:34 |
You're out! |
00:33:39 |
What are you doing?! |
00:33:41 |
Yes! |
00:34:02 |
I'm sorry, honey, |
00:34:04 |
I pulled a muscle |
00:34:06 |
- You gotta be kidding. |
00:34:09 |
Gus, we're trying to start a family. |
00:34:14 |
I would hope not, because that |
00:34:17 |
We don't want that. |
00:34:18 |
I'm glad this is a big joke to you. |
00:34:21 |
Honey, I was just having a little fun. |
00:34:23 |
Come on, don't go. |
00:34:27 |
Gentlemen, yesterday's performance |
00:34:30 |
All the online chat rooms |
00:34:35 |
Hey, Mel, why aren't we out practicing |
00:34:38 |
Well, I thought we could have |
00:34:41 |
Maybe become more well-rounded |
00:34:43 |
Nothing much. |
00:34:47 |
- Yeah, Clark. |
00:34:50 |
- Shut up, Number 7. |
00:34:53 |
I'll kill you. |
00:34:54 |
I want you guys to meet |
00:34:56 |
...who knows a thing or two |
00:34:59 |
Ready when you are, buddy! |
00:35:01 |
- Is that Mr. T? |
00:35:04 |
No, no. |
00:35:06 |
That's Reggie Jackson. |
00:35:08 |
Yeah, no, I don't know. |
00:35:10 |
Mr. October! Five hundred |
00:35:13 |
Twice World Series MVP... |
00:35:15 |
...where he spanked |
00:35:17 |
Three on three pitches. |
00:35:18 |
Reggie bar and I met at tuba camp |
00:35:24 |
- Look at that. |
00:35:26 |
- That's you, Reggie? |
00:35:29 |
- I was a cute kid. |
00:35:31 |
You're like a young Denzel. |
00:35:33 |
I didn't know Denzel played Urkel. |
00:35:36 |
Reginator and I went through |
00:35:38 |
...with bullies and being picked on. |
00:35:41 |
I can't stand that stuff. |
00:35:44 |
- Crazy! |
00:35:46 |
Easy. |
00:35:49 |
Anyway, |
00:35:51 |
...we're having problems |
00:35:54 |
He agreed to come and help us |
00:35:57 |
We'll do the same drills that I did |
00:36:01 |
All right. |
00:36:01 |
All right. |
00:36:02 |
Hey, so whose house is this? |
00:36:05 |
This is to teach you speed. |
00:36:06 |
How is standing here gonna teach us |
00:36:09 |
- Hey, run! |
00:36:11 |
- Go, go! |
00:36:13 |
Go, go, go! |
00:36:14 |
Who in the hell is it?! |
00:36:20 |
Nobody messes with me! |
00:36:22 |
I will rip your throat out! |
00:36:25 |
And I will find you! |
00:36:30 |
You're in the bushes! |
00:36:34 |
I'm sorry! |
00:36:36 |
I'm sorry! Go back to sleep! |
00:36:46 |
- Come on, guys, let's go. Come on. |
00:36:58 |
Who's there? |
00:37:00 |
You better run, you smart alecks! |
00:37:02 |
- Who is it, Brad? |
00:37:05 |
...who better watch their backs! |
00:37:07 |
Relax, smarty pants. |
00:37:11 |
- Brad have a pool? |
00:37:15 |
Yeah, I guess you're right. |
00:37:17 |
Oh, you little devil. |
00:37:21 |
Nightmares. |
00:37:22 |
This next drill, boys, is for your |
00:37:28 |
Hot potato! |
00:37:31 |
No! |
00:37:33 |
Excellent, Clark. |
00:37:36 |
Clark, let it go! |
00:37:41 |
- Throw it! Get rid of it! |
00:37:44 |
Release! Release! Release! |
00:37:55 |
Sorry. |
00:37:57 |
Oh, dear. |
00:37:59 |
Well... |
00:38:01 |
The final drill is for |
00:38:06 |
Let's go racing! |
00:38:10 |
- Look at that! Excellent! |
00:38:14 |
- Yeah, baby! |
00:38:17 |
That's my friend! |
00:38:22 |
Give me the bat. |
00:38:23 |
Gus Bus! Gus Bus! |
00:38:30 |
Thattaway to go. |
00:38:32 |
Don't fall. |
00:38:33 |
- You got it. You can do it. |
00:38:38 |
Man, you can do it. You can do it. |
00:38:43 |
Clark, you're lucky I'm a billionaire. |
00:38:47 |
The score is all tied up. |
00:38:48 |
The bottom of the sixth. This is |
00:38:53 |
Strike. |
00:38:54 |
All right, Clark. |
00:38:59 |
Strike two! |
00:39:00 |
- Clark just made contact. |
00:39:03 |
Grab real tight and concen... |
00:39:07 |
Hey! |
00:39:10 |
- Better distance that time. Yeah. |
00:39:13 |
Richie's coming up. |
00:39:16 |
All right, Richie, here we go. |
00:39:18 |
She's way out of your league. |
00:39:21 |
- What's? |
00:39:23 |
Women don't think that's too cute. |
00:39:26 |
Shouldn't you be at home, |
00:39:29 |
Shouldn't you be at home |
00:39:31 |
That's the only action a tool like you |
00:39:37 |
Take it out on the ball, not his head. |
00:39:48 |
Run! Run! |
00:39:50 |
Move your ass, Richie! |
00:39:53 |
- Run, Richie, run! |
00:39:57 |
Go! Go! Go! |
00:40:01 |
Slide if you have to! |
00:40:04 |
He's rounding third |
00:40:06 |
Bring it, dork. |
00:40:18 |
Touch home plate! |
00:40:20 |
Richie, touch home! |
00:40:24 |
- Safe! |
00:40:25 |
- Benchwarmers win! |
00:40:29 |
I ain't a virgin now... |
00:40:31 |
...to home runs, beyotch! |
00:40:41 |
The Benchwarmers win a close one |
00:40:44 |
... in the history of the universe. |
00:40:47 |
- I never hit it. |
00:40:50 |
Are you serious? |
00:40:52 |
- Yeah, you can. |
00:40:54 |
Write my name on the ball? |
00:40:55 |
You see that home run? |
00:40:58 |
Wait, do you need my address too? |
00:41:01 |
You guys are making some noise. |
00:41:06 |
My dad has ear hair. |
00:41:08 |
Is "badass" one or two words? |
00:41:14 |
- How do they keep winning?! |
00:41:17 |
- Who wants to wrestle? |
00:41:20 |
- All right. |
00:41:22 |
Gotcha. |
00:41:24 |
Howie, look, |
00:41:27 |
They're dropping off |
00:41:29 |
They look very aggressive. |
00:41:33 |
- I think they wanna beat me up. |
00:41:35 |
Just take the Thin Mints back |
00:41:38 |
- That's our food for the week. |
00:41:41 |
You can eat the Thin Mints |
00:41:54 |
Hot. Hot. |
00:41:56 |
Hot sun. |
00:42:03 |
Cookie. |
00:42:07 |
Sun, bad! Sun, bad! |
00:42:14 |
Excuse me? |
00:42:18 |
- Are you okay? |
00:42:21 |
- No biggie. What's going on? |
00:42:26 |
Hey, well, I'm the management |
00:42:29 |
Oh, they're not late. But thank you. |
00:42:32 |
Well, anything you want |
00:42:36 |
I'm Sarah, |
00:42:39 |
He's a huge fan of yours |
00:42:43 |
Cool. Thanks for cheering us on. |
00:42:46 |
Hey, what does "beyotch" mean? |
00:42:48 |
That's... |
00:42:50 |
That means "good game" |
00:42:52 |
Well, we'll let you get back to work. |
00:42:54 |
Okay. But maybe I'll see you |
00:42:57 |
Yeah. Definitely. |
00:43:00 |
- All right. See you, Jarrett. |
00:43:05 |
Marty, what do you think |
00:43:07 |
I smell cinnamon rolls. |
00:43:11 |
Oh, I smell cinnamon rolls too. |
00:43:15 |
Gentlemen, check it out. |
00:43:17 |
Nerd headquarters. |
00:43:21 |
Hey, guys, take a gander at these. |
00:43:26 |
- Give me that. |
00:43:28 |
- What? |
00:43:30 |
- I hit 30 home runs. |
00:43:33 |
I have 20 eyes-closed strikeouts, five |
00:43:37 |
I'm freaking awesome! |
00:43:39 |
Now listen up. Brookdale and Candia |
00:43:42 |
We have to beat them |
00:43:45 |
Unfortunately, it is on |
00:43:48 |
We'll have to hit the road |
00:43:50 |
- Did you say Brookdale? |
00:43:53 |
- Yeah. |
00:43:55 |
We'll have a big |
00:43:57 |
No! |
00:43:59 |
I mean, it's all right. |
00:44:01 |
I lost contact with everybody there. |
00:44:03 |
Wait, so we're staying overnight? |
00:44:05 |
Does my mother have to sign |
00:44:07 |
No, but we will have to change |
00:44:11 |
Seriously, it's been three days. |
00:44:13 |
Sweetheart, I have to leave town |
00:44:17 |
You never mentioned |
00:44:20 |
I know. This is the first one. |
00:44:22 |
My ovulation schedule is delayed |
00:44:27 |
So it's okay. |
00:44:28 |
Hey, Gussie, |
00:44:31 |
...and he grew up to be smart |
00:44:35 |
Or imagine he's only 3 feet tall... |
00:44:38 |
...and everybody in the school calls |
00:44:41 |
Then, just for fun, |
00:44:44 |
...and laugh until |
00:44:48 |
Were you Midget Boy or Yoda? |
00:44:50 |
I don't wanna talk about it. |
00:44:52 |
Just make some room, honey, |
00:44:57 |
Oh, my God, you're not kidding! |
00:45:10 |
Mel is officially insane. |
00:45:14 |
Oh, my God. |
00:45:17 |
Right? |
00:45:19 |
Gus, how sick is this? |
00:45:23 |
Check out the fridge, it's full of sweets. |
00:45:27 |
- Oh, man. |
00:45:30 |
That's creepy. |
00:45:32 |
- What the hell is that? |
00:45:35 |
Howie? You left the house. |
00:45:38 |
Richie told me about the killer |
00:45:41 |
He's killing anyone named Howie. |
00:45:45 |
Just go with it. |
00:45:49 |
Let's go, boys, we gotta be |
00:45:52 |
This team we're playing is notorious |
00:45:56 |
Destroy them! |
00:45:58 |
Howie, you're a freak. |
00:46:00 |
Edgar, let's get this Gus Bus |
00:46:04 |
Game three. Benchwarmers vs. |
00:46:08 |
- Are we here? |
00:46:10 |
I think we are. |
00:46:11 |
It's sixth inning and the Benchwarmers |
00:46:14 |
...with Clark Reedy up on deck. |
00:46:19 |
- Clark, hold the bat. |
00:46:22 |
- That's good. |
00:46:24 |
- Oh, I see. |
00:46:27 |
Hey, Richie! I look like a mummy! |
00:46:32 |
- God, it worked! |
00:46:34 |
- Awesome! |
00:46:36 |
Come on, run it out! |
00:46:40 |
Let's go! Yeah! |
00:46:42 |
And Richie scores! |
00:46:45 |
I made it! I made it! Yeah! |
00:46:47 |
Clark, bend down. |
00:47:02 |
What the heck was that? |
00:47:05 |
What a moron! |
00:47:12 |
The ball gets away from the catcher! |
00:47:17 |
Go! He missed it! |
00:47:19 |
Hey! What the...? Let go! |
00:47:23 |
- Go, Gus, go! |
00:47:25 |
- Come on, over here! Third! |
00:47:29 |
Get the ball! Get the ball! Home! |
00:47:33 |
Yeah! |
00:47:37 |
It burns. |
00:47:40 |
- Hot. |
00:47:43 |
And the Benchwarmers win it, 5-4. |
00:47:54 |
Look at all these people. |
00:47:56 |
Or Wham! . |
00:47:57 |
Get your Benchwarmers souvenirs. |
00:47:59 |
Slide rules, pocket protectors, |
00:48:01 |
We got everything you need. |
00:48:04 |
Welcome to Brookdale for game four. |
00:48:09 |
Coach Bellows, Gus Matthews |
00:48:11 |
Shake hands |
00:48:13 |
Matthews. That sounds familiar. |
00:48:16 |
No. |
00:48:18 |
I grew up on the North Pole. |
00:48:20 |
Not even close to here. |
00:48:23 |
And here's the pitch. |
00:48:26 |
It's a high fly ball! |
00:48:41 |
Bad news. |
00:48:44 |
Gus is up. Clark's on third. |
00:48:49 |
He smacked that one! |
00:48:56 |
- No! |
00:48:58 |
This game is all tied up. |
00:49:12 |
- Richie hit a four-footer. |
00:49:15 |
Run it out! Run it out! Get there! |
00:49:18 |
He's safe! He's safe! He's safe! |
00:49:29 |
- Way to go! Run it out! |
00:49:34 |
Richie scores! |
00:49:36 |
Clark overran third base. |
00:49:39 |
Safe! |
00:49:44 |
Too high! Bad idea! Call 911! |
00:49:47 |
That was close. Benchwarmers, 3-2. |
00:49:52 |
- Hey, could we please leave, Mel? |
00:49:55 |
Gus! |
00:49:59 |
Gus, maybe this'll relax you. |
00:50:01 |
Fresh off the presses |
00:50:03 |
- We're on the front page. |
00:50:04 |
"Benchwarmers Get Hizzot |
00:50:08 |
Mel, if my wife sees this, |
00:50:11 |
Do not fret, my good man. |
00:50:13 |
Number 7 is covering |
00:50:22 |
Problem solved, Gus. |
00:50:28 |
Welcome to the semifinals |
00:50:30 |
Wayne's Hardware stands between |
00:50:34 |
Meanwhile, the nerd fans |
00:50:39 |
Hey, Jerry, what's going on? |
00:50:41 |
Who's this? |
00:50:42 |
I wanted you guys to have a little edge |
00:50:46 |
He is from the Dominican Republic, |
00:50:50 |
Carlos, that's great. |
00:50:52 |
- How old are you? |
00:50:55 |
More like 1200. |
00:50:57 |
Check my birth certificate. |
00:50:59 |
He's legit. |
00:51:04 |
You're kidding. |
00:51:11 |
That's your kid? |
00:51:13 |
Well, thanks a lot, Jerry, |
00:51:16 |
- I think we'll be fine. |
00:51:20 |
- I need a refill. |
00:51:25 |
No, really. I need a refill. |
00:51:35 |
Here, hold this. |
00:51:40 |
Look, a vampire. |
00:51:49 |
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! |
00:51:57 |
Strike three! |
00:52:03 |
It's a hit parade! |
00:52:11 |
Time-out! |
00:52:14 |
It's about time. You're in, you're in. |
00:52:20 |
Come on, hombre. |
00:52:32 |
- Dude, you smell like beer. |
00:52:35 |
- Hey, who the hell's this guy? |
00:52:38 |
- Is he on your roster? |
00:52:40 |
He wasn't well earlier, |
00:52:43 |
Mi tummy es sick-o. |
00:52:45 |
This guy's 50. He's got a mustache. |
00:52:48 |
Not according to birth "certifico." |
00:52:57 |
He's got documentation. Play ball! |
00:53:09 |
Get out of here, baby! |
00:53:12 |
Yeah! |
00:53:19 |
Oh, shit. |
00:53:21 |
Howie, listen, take this money... |
00:53:24 |
...go buy beer and tequila, |
00:53:26 |
- Don't be scared. |
00:53:29 |
Go, go, go. |
00:53:30 |
- Nelson. |
00:53:35 |
Strike three! |
00:53:42 |
You gotta step in the batter's box. |
00:53:46 |
I'm gonna kill your family. |
00:53:51 |
Yes! |
00:53:56 |
- Yeah! |
00:53:58 |
Looks like the Gus Bus |
00:54:02 |
I got it! I got it! |
00:54:07 |
That's what I'm talking about! |
00:54:17 |
Third inning, and the Benchwarmers |
00:54:20 |
Your hair is like a waterfall. |
00:54:23 |
- Thank you. |
00:54:25 |
Who say my name? |
00:54:28 |
This is a present |
00:54:31 |
You're really good at baseball. |
00:54:33 |
Gracias, albino. Now get lost! |
00:54:39 |
Two outs and the Benchwarmers |
00:54:52 |
- Go, go, go! |
00:55:09 |
- Safe! |
00:55:11 |
- He did it! |
00:55:19 |
My hand! |
00:55:21 |
Top of the sixth, |
00:55:25 |
That looks rough, dude. |
00:55:28 |
It's not broken, but I can't pitch. |
00:55:30 |
- Richie, can you pitch? |
00:55:33 |
- My vote is to have Clark pitch. |
00:55:36 |
You throw newspapers. |
00:55:39 |
- Come on, come on. Let's go, guys. |
00:55:43 |
- What are you gonna do? |
00:55:46 |
I can still catch pop flies. |
00:55:49 |
I'll try. |
00:55:52 |
I wonder if Clark pitched before. |
00:55:56 |
- Nope. |
00:56:01 |
Ball three. |
00:56:03 |
Come on. |
00:56:05 |
Ball four. Take your base. |
00:56:07 |
Two-run lead. Bases are loaded, |
00:56:15 |
One run scores. |
00:56:20 |
The tying run scores. |
00:56:26 |
Here comes the lead run! |
00:56:30 |
- Out! |
00:56:35 |
We go to the bottom of the last inning, |
00:56:40 |
Carlos, we need tres more outs |
00:56:43 |
Is that beer? |
00:56:45 |
No, it's Gatorade, honky. |
00:56:50 |
The Benchwarmers need something |
00:56:57 |
It's a live ball! Run it out! |
00:57:05 |
Yes! |
00:57:09 |
Maria... |
00:57:10 |
...why did you leave me? |
00:57:13 |
Letting a 12-year-old drink like that |
00:57:17 |
Here we go, Richie, here we go! |
00:57:20 |
- Ball! |
00:57:23 |
Here we go, Richie, here we go! |
00:57:26 |
Take your base. |
00:57:33 |
Gus is up, and here's the pitch. |
00:57:40 |
Safe! |
00:57:42 |
Hey, who's on deck? |
00:57:47 |
- Damn! |
00:57:49 |
- They have to forfeit. |
00:57:51 |
- You have any reserve players? |
00:57:54 |
What about that guy over there |
00:58:00 |
He's never played before. |
00:58:02 |
That's not my problem. |
00:58:05 |
Hey, either he plays |
00:58:11 |
Last inning, winning run's on third, |
00:58:21 |
- Look at this freak. |
00:58:25 |
Someone get his sword. |
00:58:28 |
- Here you go, Howie. Take this. |
00:58:31 |
Get up and take a swing. |
00:58:36 |
Look at all those albinos. |
00:58:40 |
Wait till he pitches the ball, retard. |
00:58:43 |
Strike! |
00:58:46 |
They should let him use his sword. |
00:58:49 |
Maria! |
00:58:52 |
- No. |
00:58:56 |
Weird guy! Weird guy! Weird guy! |
00:59:10 |
Take the base. |
00:59:14 |
- No way! We win! We win! |
00:59:17 |
- You have to touch first base, kid. |
00:59:20 |
Howie, hit by the pitch, |
00:59:23 |
...and sends the Benchwarmers |
00:59:26 |
That's game. |
00:59:33 |
Carlos, you're drunk! |
00:59:39 |
We're here with Richie Goodman |
00:59:42 |
How do you feel after that win? |
00:59:43 |
What can I say? |
00:59:46 |
Hey, could I give a shout-out |
00:59:51 |
I like salad. |
00:59:55 |
Guys, can you believe this crap? |
00:59:57 |
I'd like to beat his ass, |
01:00:00 |
- Are they any good? |
01:00:04 |
This is Gus Matthews, the heart |
01:00:07 |
Gus Matthews? |
01:00:09 |
So were you bullied as a kid? |
01:00:11 |
The bully thing affected my life pretty |
01:00:16 |
... messing with other kids |
01:00:18 |
What? That guy damaged more kids |
01:00:22 |
He made my life hell growing up. |
01:00:24 |
You're twice his size. |
01:00:27 |
He didn't do the physical warfare. |
01:00:29 |
He played the psychological card |
01:00:32 |
I started losing my hair |
01:00:34 |
He jumped all over it |
01:00:37 |
Eight Ball, Bowling Ball... |
01:00:39 |
...Kojak, Mr. Clean, |
01:00:42 |
...Scatman Crothers, |
01:00:46 |
How about the |
01:00:49 |
That's a good one. |
01:00:50 |
He used that too! |
01:00:55 |
Oh, don't cry, buddy. |
01:00:59 |
- It looks great. Doesn't it, guys? |
01:01:02 |
- Really, brothers? |
01:01:03 |
Sure, Daddy Warbucks. I would've |
01:01:07 |
If I was blindfolded. |
01:01:10 |
Got a problem? Why don't you punch |
01:01:14 |
Pour some honey on me. |
01:01:20 |
Anyway, at least I left there |
01:01:23 |
He actually teased this one midget boy |
01:01:27 |
...the little fella up and quit baseball |
01:01:31 |
Guys, we gotta tell Jerry. |
01:01:34 |
- Definitely. |
01:01:37 |
Really? Well, thanks, Cassandra. |
01:01:39 |
- What's the score now, Mel? |
01:01:42 |
That means our town |
01:01:44 |
Nelson and his buddies will, |
01:01:47 |
Yeah! Wicked! |
01:01:49 |
- Number 7, shakes all around! |
01:01:52 |
I gotta take a leak. |
01:01:53 |
Down the hall, |
01:01:59 |
Last night, we did a story |
01:02:02 |
... a team of three men who were |
01:02:06 |
... and are now making up |
01:02:09 |
Hello, Gus. |
01:02:12 |
Chemical analysis of your pee shows |
01:02:16 |
... or you're going to die. |
01:02:19 |
We have just been given evidence |
01:02:22 |
... is not the man |
01:02:25 |
Hey, no shake for me. |
01:02:27 |
Gus Matthews was easily |
01:02:30 |
Well, you weren't the nicest kid |
01:02:35 |
I hate everybody! |
01:02:37 |
What a baby. But he's right. |
01:02:39 |
I was their principal back then, |
01:02:42 |
I remember he especially |
01:02:45 |
... that the poor boy |
01:02:47 |
That's really too bad. Those guys |
01:02:51 |
This is Kathy Dobson |
01:02:55 |
You were a jerk just like the rest |
01:02:59 |
I made a mistake, Nelson. |
01:03:03 |
I wish I could take it all back. |
01:03:06 |
I can't believe I looked up to you. |
01:03:15 |
I don't know what to say, guys. |
01:03:19 |
I'm sorry. |
01:03:27 |
Let's party! |
01:03:29 |
Not now, Number 7! |
01:03:36 |
Is that why you don't |
01:03:42 |
Do you feel you don't deserve |
01:03:47 |
I'm afraid that if we have kids, they're |
01:03:51 |
...because karma |
01:03:54 |
Sweetheart, you are wrong. |
01:03:59 |
I can't just learn a lesson |
01:04:02 |
That little boy that I picked on |
01:04:04 |
...he didn't ever move on. |
01:04:06 |
I bet he'd be able to move on |
01:04:22 |
Can I help you? |
01:04:25 |
- Marcus, honey. |
01:04:28 |
I just finished another peanut butter |
01:04:33 |
Oh, that's nice. |
01:04:37 |
But I don't know anyone. |
01:04:42 |
It's Gus from grade school. |
01:04:45 |
No! |
01:04:47 |
Don't come down here! |
01:04:51 |
- Marcus... |
01:04:53 |
Take it easy. Take it easy. |
01:04:55 |
- Don't touch me! |
01:04:58 |
Just give me a chance. |
01:05:04 |
Marcus, stop trying to cast spells. |
01:05:07 |
- Marcus... |
01:05:14 |
Look, Marcus, I want to apologize... |
01:05:16 |
...for all the nasty things I did to you |
01:05:19 |
I'm not here to mess with you. |
01:05:21 |
You're lying to me |
01:05:24 |
You are denied entry. |
01:05:26 |
I'm sorry, |
01:05:29 |
I was stupid, Marcus. |
01:05:31 |
Get out of my basement! |
01:05:35 |
I didn't expect you to forgive me. |
01:05:38 |
Look, I know because of me... |
01:05:40 |
...you were never able to feel |
01:05:43 |
...or be part of a team. |
01:05:45 |
So I wanna |
01:05:50 |
Because even though |
01:05:52 |
...you are the heart and soul |
01:05:58 |
I'll see you around, buddy. |
01:06:12 |
Start here. |
01:06:14 |
- You've got 24 hours. |
01:06:18 |
If you build it, nerds will come. |
01:06:22 |
And keep it under a billion. |
01:06:26 |
...on me. |
01:06:29 |
Excellent! |
01:06:30 |
Okay, people! |
01:06:32 |
We got 24 hours to build us |
01:06:36 |
Yeah! |
01:06:58 |
Cool! |
01:06:59 |
Are you kidding me? Look at this. |
01:07:03 |
- Swings! |
01:07:06 |
- Slide. |
01:07:08 |
- We'll all go in after. |
01:07:11 |
We're here live in Greenfield |
01:07:14 |
...between the Benchwarmers |
01:07:16 |
The Benchwarmers were |
01:07:19 |
Let's see what the fans have to say. |
01:07:21 |
Excuse me, sir. What do you think |
01:07:24 |
His soul will perish in the fire pit |
01:07:30 |
There you have it. The fire pits. |
01:07:35 |
Around the horn. |
01:07:38 |
We could still win this thing. |
01:07:40 |
- Wha...? How? |
01:07:43 |
Let's try not to be too geeky, Clark. |
01:07:46 |
The Force is powerful, |
01:07:49 |
He's right. It is. |
01:07:51 |
Hey, guys. |
01:07:56 |
I know I'm not |
01:07:58 |
...but I just wanted you to know that |
01:08:02 |
Because you'll always be |
01:08:06 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
01:08:09 |
...and the final game |
01:08:13 |
...of Little Baseballers |
01:08:19 |
Homo! |
01:08:21 |
Hey, check out the little gnome. |
01:08:26 |
Play ball! |
01:08:32 |
Can I say something? |
01:08:33 |
Yeah, I guess so. |
01:08:37 |
Hand me the mike, please. |
01:08:42 |
Hello, everyone. |
01:08:46 |
...better known |
01:08:49 |
Or Yoda! Or Midget Boy! |
01:08:55 |
It is true I ended up in an institution |
01:08:59 |
...from Gus bullying me all the time. |
01:09:02 |
And he made my life miserable |
01:09:05 |
To be honest, I thought I would never |
01:09:12 |
But then yesterday |
01:09:17 |
And as I cowered in my peanut butter |
01:09:22 |
And I could hear the sadness |
01:09:25 |
This nerd makes me |
01:09:27 |
I don't think so. |
01:09:29 |
- John Stamos? |
01:09:32 |
And then, moments |
01:09:36 |
...I saw a hat on my stuffed moose. |
01:09:39 |
The hat of a Benchwarmer. |
01:09:42 |
A Benchwarmer begging |
01:09:46 |
...and so many of you. |
01:09:48 |
He shouldn't get a new start! I'll never |
01:09:52 |
Yeah! |
01:09:53 |
Young one, |
01:09:58 |
Do you remember episode |
01:10:04 |
The golden elves forgive the great |
01:10:08 |
...even though the giants |
01:10:12 |
The elves realized the giants |
01:10:20 |
He's a modern-day Yoda. |
01:10:22 |
I mean, not his looks |
01:10:27 |
- Actually, his looks too. Yeah. |
01:10:30 |
And so I forgive my new friend Gus, |
01:10:35 |
Look at all the joy and hope |
01:10:39 |
He has more than paid his dues. |
01:10:45 |
- Go, Gus! |
01:10:49 |
Thank you, Marcus. Come on. |
01:10:54 |
- Hey. Buddies for life. |
01:10:58 |
- I want a little man too. |
01:11:08 |
Me and the guys have been playing |
01:11:13 |
We did it to show that everyone |
01:11:17 |
...and have fun. |
01:11:21 |
And that is why Clark, Richie and I |
01:11:28 |
Instead, our team will consist of |
01:11:31 |
...what it's like to play in front |
01:11:35 |
Let me tell you, |
01:11:37 |
So please, put your nerd |
01:11:41 |
...and welcome to the field |
01:11:45 |
- Yeah! |
01:11:48 |
All right! |
01:11:50 |
Now, lastly, let's make some noise |
01:11:54 |
Marcus Ellwood! |
01:11:59 |
Is he all right? |
01:12:01 |
For years I thought the sun |
01:12:04 |
I'm here to tell you that it's not |
01:12:08 |
- You're all right. |
01:12:10 |
All right, let's have some fun! |
01:12:12 |
Hey, everybody, |
01:12:14 |
... and we're standing in |
01:12:17 |
And we're gonna get things going |
01:12:20 |
He got it. |
01:12:22 |
Oh, no. |
01:12:25 |
And he's okay. |
01:12:27 |
Oh, hey, that's my helmet! |
01:12:29 |
It's all right, buddy. |
01:12:31 |
Nice try, Sammy! |
01:12:33 |
Oh, my God, I just saw |
01:12:36 |
Let's give a nice round of applause |
01:12:39 |
He missed it |
01:12:42 |
Yeah, and his coach |
01:12:44 |
That's pretty cool. |
01:12:45 |
And here comes our lead-off hitter |
01:12:49 |
Gretchen, I know why |
01:12:52 |
I also know why there's three squirrels |
01:12:59 |
Strike! Strike! Strike! |
01:13:01 |
Well, there's a strikeout. |
01:13:02 |
That's okay! Good try! Good try! |
01:13:05 |
Good going, Gretchen. |
01:13:06 |
All right, next up it's Jarrett. |
01:13:08 |
If you know Jarrett, you know his sister |
01:13:16 |
Another strikeout. |
01:13:19 |
And a strikeout. Strikeout. |
01:13:22 |
Strikeout. Strikeout. Strikeout. |
01:13:25 |
And a strikeout. |
01:13:27 |
I think we got a free stadium! |
01:13:29 |
Clark, we're beating them |
01:13:31 |
And you're also beating them |
01:13:37 |
Good game. Drive home safe tonight. |
01:13:41 |
God, he's a dick. |
01:13:45 |
He got all of that one. |
01:13:51 |
In the pool! |
01:13:53 |
Good hit, Kyle. |
01:13:55 |
Yeah, nice one, Kyle. |
01:13:59 |
Go, Kyle! |
01:14:01 |
Well, it's 42 to nothing as we head |
01:14:04 |
And it looks like the Benchwarmers |
01:14:08 |
Hey. What are you smiling at? |
01:14:10 |
I guess how much fun |
01:14:13 |
Wipe the smile off your face |
01:14:15 |
You got three more outs. |
01:14:17 |
You blow this shutout, you won't play |
01:14:20 |
Get out there and annihilate |
01:14:23 |
Let's go! |
01:14:24 |
Come on, let's do this! |
01:14:29 |
Strike one! |
01:14:30 |
Hang in there, son! |
01:14:32 |
Come on, Nelson! |
01:14:35 |
Strike two! |
01:14:36 |
Come on, strike out this loser! |
01:14:39 |
You know what? You're the loser. |
01:14:44 |
Time! |
01:14:46 |
- What's up, buddy? |
01:14:48 |
- I'll throw you one down the middle. |
01:14:51 |
It means choke up on the bat a little |
01:14:54 |
- The ball's gonna be right there. |
01:14:57 |
I can help you with your social studies |
01:15:00 |
Sounds good. |
01:15:03 |
Okay, guys, follow my lead. |
01:15:12 |
- Butterfingers. |
01:15:14 |
- Come on! Go, go! |
01:15:17 |
Why are you kicking it?! |
01:15:19 |
Go, go! |
01:15:29 |
- Go, go, go! |
01:15:30 |
Run! Come on! Go! Go! Go home! |
01:15:34 |
- Go, go, go! |
01:15:36 |
Nelson, get at the plate! |
01:15:39 |
Slide! Slide! |
01:15:41 |
Safe! |
01:15:44 |
We did not get shut out! |
01:16:02 |
What is going on? What is going on? |
01:16:07 |
You put me down! |
01:16:34 |
- Can I let you in on a secret? |
01:16:37 |
I've never actually, like, totally, |
01:16:42 |
...and I was wondering |
01:16:48 |
I would like nothing more than that. |
01:16:51 |
Rea...? |
01:16:53 |
Clark! |
01:16:55 |
You kissed a girl before I did? |
01:16:57 |
This is way better than macaroni. |
01:17:05 |
I'm not afraid of the sun anymore. |
01:17:07 |
That's good, buddy. |
01:17:10 |
Not a fan. |
01:17:14 |
Hey, Gus. The new Benchwarmers |
01:17:17 |
What do you say? |
01:17:19 |
I'd be honored, Mel... |
01:17:20 |
...but I might be a little busy |
01:17:24 |
Actually, honey, |
01:17:29 |
Really? |
01:17:33 |
Hey, everybody! |
01:17:35 |
I'm gonna be a dad! |
01:17:43 |
- That's quite an ovation. |
01:17:47 |
The reason she's pregnant is |
01:17:58 |
That's so great. |