|
Bunny and the Bull
|
| 00:02:18 |
(rings) |
| 00:02:19 |
For some time now, Stephen Turnbull |
| 00:02:23 |
Every day he showers for 27 minutes... |
| 00:02:28 |
..brushes forfour.. |
| 00:02:30 |
- ..gargles for eight... |
| 00:02:32 |
..and flosses for seven. |
| 00:02:35 |
He then files the floss... |
| 00:02:39 |
..stacks his urine... |
| 00:02:42 |
..and notes its pH. |
| 00:02:44 |
Next he washes everything |
| 00:02:48 |
completes a 200-page book |
| 00:02:51 |
and watches eight episodes of |
| 00:02:56 |
TV: Remember, you should always |
| 00:02:59 |
NARRATOR: |
| 00:03:02 |
Every day |
| 00:03:05 |
a freeze-dried vegetarian lasagne, |
| 00:03:07 |
hermetically sealed |
| 00:03:46 |
(clock ticking) |
| 00:03:49 |
But today something is different. |
| 00:03:53 |
Today there is a break |
| 00:03:59 |
Today Stephen will attempt to do |
| 00:04:02 |
something he hasn't done |
| 00:04:06 |
Today... |
| 00:04:08 |
Stephen will try to leave the house. |
| 00:04:25 |
(breathes nervously) |
| 00:04:47 |
(phone rings) |
| 00:04:52 |
MAN: Ahoy there, matey, |
| 00:04:55 |
He sails the seven seas |
| 00:04:58 |
bringing you the freshest produce |
| 00:05:03 |
Before we hoist anchor, |
| 00:05:06 |
- Stephen Turnbull. |
| 00:05:09 |
15B Limestone Road, |
| 00:05:11 |
King's Cross, London, |
| 00:05:13 |
N1 9KM. |
| 00:05:15 |
Would you like to orderfish - |
| 00:05:19 |
halibut, mackerel, catfish, krill... |
| 00:05:22 |
No. |
| 00:05:23 |
Would you like to order crustacean - |
| 00:05:27 |
No. |
| 00:05:28 |
Would you like to order |
| 00:05:31 |
- Yes. |
| 00:05:34 |
Today's vegetarian option is... |
| 00:05:36 |
(dull male voice): |
| 00:05:38 |
CAPTAIN CRAB: |
| 00:05:40 |
There's nothing that |
| 00:05:43 |
than to chow down |
| 00:05:46 |
(dull male voice): |
| 00:05:48 |
CAPTAIN CRAB: |
| 00:05:50 |
To complete the order, just say, |
| 00:05:53 |
What? |
| 00:05:55 |
Say, "Feed me." Say, "Feed me." |
| 00:05:57 |
Say, "Feed me." Say, "Feed me." |
| 00:06:00 |
Feed me. |
| 00:06:01 |
We surely will, shipmate. |
| 00:06:03 |
Now relax, |
| 00:06:07 |
(Ship's horn) |
| 00:06:48 |
Welcome to Captain Crab, sir. |
| 00:06:50 |
Please take a seat. |
| 00:06:52 |
Oh, hey dude. |
| 00:06:54 |
Mm, you look gorgeous. |
| 00:06:57 |
This is it? |
| 00:06:59 |
What? |
| 00:07:00 |
You told me you'd booked me a table |
| 00:07:04 |
- And? |
| 00:07:06 |
What the fuck are you talking about? |
| 00:07:10 |
I've been waiting for this day |
| 00:07:13 |
I'm hardly going to tell Melanie I love her |
| 00:07:16 |
Hey, come on. |
| 00:07:18 |
I've saved you the best table |
| 00:07:21 |
Hit the lights, Ray. |
| 00:07:25 |
Now, listen to me. |
| 00:07:29 |
You've carried this girl's |
| 00:07:32 |
You've even got a PhD to impress her, |
| 00:07:35 |
Ifthis piece of chicken |
| 00:07:38 |
I'll cut off my right nut. |
| 00:07:42 |
Thank you. |
| 00:07:44 |
Fuck her, dude. |
| 00:07:48 |
The "Friend Zone". |
| 00:07:50 |
Well, it was three years. |
| 00:07:52 |
In my book, if you haven't had snogsies |
| 00:07:56 |
Maybe there's a way back. |
| 00:07:58 |
No way back from the Friend Zone, |
| 00:08:00 |
She doesn't see you as a sexual being. |
| 00:08:02 |
- But I am one. |
| 00:08:04 |
I think you're gorgeous. |
| 00:08:05 |
So do loads of girls, just...not in Britain. |
| 00:08:09 |
That's why we need to hit the road, man. |
| 00:08:11 |
Find ourselves a country |
| 00:08:14 |
those walloping great Space Hoppers |
| 00:08:18 |
I'm having a year off sex. |
| 00:08:20 |
Another one? |
| 00:08:22 |
Come on, man, give yourself a break. |
| 00:08:24 |
Let's go on holiday. |
| 00:08:26 |
I thought you were broke. |
| 00:08:28 |
(Bunny chuckles) |
| 00:08:29 |
All that's about to change. |
| 00:08:33 |
Who have you got in the 3:40 at Ripon? |
| 00:08:36 |
- Future Proof. |
| 00:08:38 |
Atlantis Rising. |
| 00:08:41 |
- Are you mentally ill? |
| 00:08:43 |
I know that horse. |
| 00:08:46 |
Well... |
| 00:08:48 |
- Is this the Heindberg Theory again? |
| 00:08:51 |
There's no way the jockey with |
| 00:08:54 |
All right, you were right. |
| 00:08:58 |
But this is a bona fide tip. |
| 00:09:00 |
Masouda reckons he's a dead cert. |
| 00:09:02 |
Who's Masouda? |
| 00:09:04 |
Remember when I was in the Yemen? |
| 00:09:06 |
Masouda's this really sexy |
| 00:09:09 |
And she says in training he's dynamite. |
| 00:09:12 |
They've been slow running him |
| 00:09:15 |
And this is the race |
| 00:09:18 |
- Isn't that illegal? |
| 00:09:21 |
We'll probably go to jail. That's the point. |
| 00:09:24 |
Think about it - 50 quid at 50-1 . |
| 00:09:26 |
That's two-and-a-half grand. |
| 00:09:28 |
Easily enough for a little jaunt round |
| 00:09:33 |
Huh? |
| 00:09:34 |
All right, yeah. 50 quid on the nose. |
| 00:09:36 |
That's my boy. |
| 00:09:37 |
Last bets, please. |
| 00:09:44 |
When were you in the Yemen? |
| 00:09:47 |
Last summer. |
| 00:09:49 |
I thought you were on a fishing boat. |
| 00:09:52 |
Yeah...fishing boat in the Yemen. |
| 00:09:54 |
Oh, right. |
| 00:09:56 |
So you must know the song, then? |
| 00:09:59 |
Mm? |
| 00:10:00 |
The song that Yemenese fisher folk sing |
| 00:10:04 |
Oh, yeah. Good tune, that. |
| 00:10:06 |
Mm-hm. How did it go? |
| 00:10:11 |
⪠Wahey...fishy-fishy |
| 00:10:15 |
⪠Come onto the boat |
| 00:10:19 |
⪠Please come on |
| 00:10:21 |
⪠To the boat...why? |
| 00:10:23 |
⪠I don't know |
| 00:10:25 |
⪠Because we are hungry for our... |
| 00:10:29 |
⪠Tea |
| 00:10:31 |
- There is no Masouda, is there? |
| 00:10:33 |
- Ever been to the Yemen? |
| 00:10:35 |
- This is the Heindberg Theory again. |
| 00:10:39 |
That is one mean motherfucker. |
| 00:10:41 |
COMMENTATOR: There's the 50-1 |
| 00:10:44 |
trying to get to know the favourite, |
| 00:10:48 |
And they're off. |
| 00:10:51 |
who seems stuck |
| 00:10:53 |
The running's being made |
| 00:10:55 |
followed by Henley's A Washout |
| 00:10:58 |
while Atlantis Rising brings up the rear. |
| 00:11:00 |
As they head to the first fence, |
| 00:11:02 |
Future Proof is pulling away from |
| 00:11:06 |
while the little fancied Atlantis Rising is |
| 00:11:11 |
Useless. He's way back! |
| 00:11:12 |
They haven't let him fly yet. |
| 00:11:15 |
..between himself and the field. |
| 00:11:17 |
Atlantis Rising struggling way back. |
| 00:11:19 |
(commentary fades out) |
| 00:11:25 |
(whip cracks) |
| 00:11:28 |
- Come on! |
| 00:11:30 |
..whip has had an immediate effect. |
| 00:11:32 |
A sterling run from Atlantis Rising, |
| 00:11:34 |
moving up through the field |
| 00:11:37 |
Almost neck and neck |
| 00:11:40 |
One more! One more! |
| 00:11:41 |
Hit him harder! |
| 00:11:43 |
Coming up to the second to last. |
| 00:11:46 |
The favourite is pulling away again. |
| 00:11:48 |
Future Proof has pulled away. |
| 00:11:50 |
- Don't do that. |
| 00:11:53 |
Barring a miracle, it looks like |
| 00:11:58 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:12:00 |
- Future Proof's down! |
| 00:12:02 |
leaving a clear run now |
| 00:12:06 |
who has taken the spoils. |
| 00:12:08 |
Yeah! |
| 00:12:10 |
(laughter) |
| 00:12:14 |
We did it, man! We did it! |
| 00:12:16 |
We did it. We did it. |
| 00:12:18 |
STEPHEN: They're not gonna put |
| 00:12:22 |
No. God, no, it's not the '60s. |
| 00:12:25 |
Come on, why don't we grab a drink |
| 00:12:38 |
(train rumbles past) |
| 00:12:47 |
(clock ticking) |
| 00:13:58 |
There we go. |
| 00:14:04 |
Where's your luggage? |
| 00:14:09 |
You're an idiot. |
| 00:14:10 |
The book says there are 31 essentials |
| 00:14:15 |
Money belt, passport, tickets, camera, |
| 00:14:17 |
bug spray, sun cream, flashlight, string, |
| 00:14:18 |
waterproof matches, lighter, tripod, |
| 00:14:20 |
life jacket, compass, maps, spare string, |
| 00:14:22 |
sleeping bag, ground sheet, |
| 00:14:24 |
first-aid kit, loo roll, spade, strong string, |
| 00:14:26 |
camper stove, whistle, binoculars, |
| 00:14:28 |
water pills, galoshes |
| 00:14:32 |
Hm. |
| 00:14:33 |
- Got any string? |
| 00:14:35 |
Got plenty, actually. |
| 00:14:37 |
That's very funny. Very good. |
| 00:14:39 |
Fancy a tinny? A going-away present |
| 00:14:42 |
- That's nice. |
| 00:14:45 |
- You nicked them. |
| 00:14:47 |
No, I'll make one of my cocktails. |
| 00:14:49 |
Not one ofthose things. |
| 00:14:50 |
- I thought you said you liked them. |
| 00:14:53 |
So? |
| 00:14:55 |
By the time you've finished making that, |
| 00:14:58 |
Care to make it interesting? |
| 00:15:00 |
Yeah, fiver. |
| 00:15:02 |
OK. |
| 00:15:05 |
(guard's whistle) |
| 00:15:08 |
Hey, look. |
| 00:15:10 |
We're moving. |
| 00:15:23 |
Cheers. |
| 00:15:24 |
Alka Seltzer. |
| 00:15:30 |
What's this for? |
| 00:15:32 |
Ladies and gentlemen, |
| 00:15:34 |
Mesdames et messieurs, |
| 00:15:37 |
Yes! |
| 00:15:38 |
Fuck you, England! |
| 00:15:45 |
Oh, they are good, actually. |
| 00:15:49 |
I'm gonna have a little doze. |
| 00:15:56 |
- Where are we? |
| 00:15:58 |
Europe is our oyster. |
| 00:16:00 |
Oysters! |
| 00:16:02 |
I need a bacon sandwich. |
| 00:16:04 |
So, come on, where do you fancy? |
| 00:16:06 |
This is your holiday, buddy. |
| 00:16:10 |
Then you are in for a treat. |
| 00:16:13 |
This is 1 ,500 pages of pure fun. |
| 00:17:18 |
Come on, girls, join us. |
| 00:17:22 |
STEPHEN: |
| 00:17:25 |
Oh, great. |
| 00:17:27 |
We're having a really wonderful time, |
| 00:17:30 |
I wondered what you were... |
| 00:17:34 |
Oh, wow! |
| 00:17:36 |
Erm...who with? |
| 00:17:38 |
You know, |
| 00:17:41 |
All right, well... |
| 00:17:44 |
I'll leave you with |
| 00:17:48 |
And erm... |
| 00:17:50 |
(line goes dead) |
| 00:17:53 |
Bye. |
| 00:17:59 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:18:01 |
(woman moans) |
| 00:18:03 |
(Bunny grunts) |
| 00:18:07 |
Bunny! |
| 00:18:08 |
I said hang on! What's your beef? |
| 00:18:11 |
It's our stop. |
| 00:18:13 |
All right, I'm just finishing. |
| 00:18:17 |
(moans of pleasure) |
| 00:18:24 |
(moans increase in intensity) |
| 00:18:26 |
WOMAN: |
| 00:18:28 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:18:33 |
This better be good. |
| 00:18:35 |
(train horn blares) |
| 00:18:39 |
From the early sandal |
| 00:18:41 |
to the latest hi-tech trainer, |
| 00:18:43 |
shoes have always been |
| 00:18:47 |
It's a big subject. |
| 00:18:48 |
There's obviously a hell of a lot to get |
| 00:18:52 |
so let's start offwith some ofthe basics. |
| 00:18:54 |
What is a shoe? |
| 00:18:56 |
Well, it's a hot topic |
| 00:19:01 |
But I find it's best to take things... |
| 00:19:04 |
..one step at a time. |
| 00:19:05 |
(Bunny yawns) |
| 00:19:10 |
Cobblers. |
| 00:19:12 |
Mind my language, |
| 00:19:16 |
what I like to call the heart and sole |
| 00:19:21 |
All kinds of shoe are made here. |
| 00:19:24 |
How many different types |
| 00:19:26 |
Let's kick offwith a couple. |
| 00:19:29 |
Clogs, moccasins, |
| 00:19:32 |
brogues, deck shoes, |
| 00:19:34 |
loafers, winklepickers... |
| 00:19:36 |
Are you having fun? |
| 00:19:38 |
Yes. |
| 00:19:40 |
Hm. |
| 00:19:41 |
You don't look like you're having fun. |
| 00:19:43 |
Well, I am. |
| 00:19:45 |
Hm. |
| 00:19:46 |
..rugby shoes, lacrosse shoes, |
| 00:19:49 |
ping-pong shoes... |
| 00:19:51 |
- What do you want to do? |
| 00:19:53 |
Fine. There's a place downstairs where |
| 00:19:57 |
Why would I want to do that? |
| 00:19:59 |
So you can learn while you eat. |
| 00:20:01 |
The only thing I want to learn |
| 00:20:04 |
one man can shovel into his cake hole |
| 00:20:08 |
I should've gone to Denmark. |
| 00:20:10 |
Is a ski a shoe? |
| 00:20:12 |
Well, there are two camps - |
| 00:20:14 |
the "yes" camp, |
| 00:20:15 |
and the "probably not" camp. |
| 00:20:17 |
If I'm such a dead weight, |
| 00:20:21 |
I'm not saying that. |
| 00:20:23 |
This is your holiday, buddy. |
| 00:20:25 |
I just think we need to |
| 00:20:27 |
Whatever you say. |
| 00:20:29 |
Right, give me your map. |
| 00:20:33 |
Now, this is where we're eating. |
| 00:20:41 |
Huh? |
| 00:20:44 |
How about that? |
| 00:20:46 |
(baby crying) |
| 00:20:48 |
(snores) |
| 00:21:02 |
Welcome to Captain Crab. He sails |
| 00:21:05 |
We hope you enjoy your meal which may |
| 00:21:09 |
My name is Eloisa. |
| 00:21:12 |
Yes, I'll have one |
| 00:21:14 |
- (phone rings) |
| 00:21:21 |
Hello, Captain Crab. |
| 00:21:23 |
Fuck you, Pawel, you son of a goat! |
| 00:21:26 |
You donkey fucker! |
| 00:21:29 |
I'm going to chop off your penis |
| 00:21:31 |
Then I will make an omelette |
| 00:21:34 |
so you know what your balls taste like |
| 00:21:38 |
which is shit! |
| 00:21:39 |
I hope your father dies of cancer |
| 00:21:41 |
and your mother explodes |
| 00:21:50 |
..the deep-fried calamari |
| 00:21:53 |
And I'll just have the vegetarian... |
| 00:21:55 |
(phone rings) |
| 00:21:57 |
..option. |
| 00:21:59 |
Hm? |
| 00:22:00 |
No, Pawel, I'm leaving. |
| 00:22:02 |
I've spent two months working |
| 00:22:06 |
where the fish comes from a canal and |
| 00:22:10 |
And then you cheat on me! |
| 00:22:12 |
Fuck you, you bald, |
| 00:22:21 |
Sorry. What was that? |
| 00:22:23 |
Er...I'll just have |
| 00:22:26 |
(phone rings) |
| 00:22:33 |
OK, let's go. |
| 00:22:35 |
Ah, she just argued with her boyfriend. |
| 00:22:37 |
This is Captain Crab, dude. |
| 00:22:40 |
Whoa...that was prompt. |
| 00:22:44 |
They make all the food on Monday |
| 00:22:50 |
You can't eat that. |
| 00:22:51 |
- Who says I can't? |
| 00:22:54 |
I don't want to look at it. |
| 00:22:57 |
Look at it. |
| 00:23:03 |
Oh, my God! |
| 00:23:06 |
I think it's trying |
| 00:23:08 |
I really think we should go. |
| 00:23:12 |
Bunny! |
| 00:23:17 |
Whoa, hang on a minute. |
| 00:23:22 |
These fellas look all right. |
| 00:23:25 |
I'm not gonna watch you kill a crab. |
| 00:23:27 |
I'm not gonna kill 'em. |
| 00:23:30 |
(bell tings) |
| 00:23:32 |
Trzy, dwa, jeden... |
| 00:23:36 |
(shouts of encouragement) |
| 00:23:42 |
Come on! |
| 00:23:44 |
Yeah! |
| 00:23:47 |
(electricity fizzing) |
| 00:24:10 |
You should go talk to her. |
| 00:24:12 |
What? |
| 00:24:13 |
She was looking at you. |
| 00:24:15 |
No, I don't think that she was. |
| 00:24:17 |
Well... |
| 00:24:29 |
Yeah, well, maybe I'll just get some air. |
| 00:24:38 |
Oh! Sorry, sorry. |
| 00:24:40 |
Excuse me. |
| 00:24:43 |
Do you have a light? |
| 00:24:46 |
What? |
| 00:24:48 |
Do you have a light? |
| 00:24:50 |
- Fuego? |
| 00:24:52 |
Yes, I do, actually, as a matter offact. |
| 00:24:56 |
Yeah. |
| 00:25:06 |
If you ever want any welding done... |
| 00:25:09 |
Welding? |
| 00:25:11 |
It's when you join bits of metal together. |
| 00:25:15 |
Why would I want to do that? |
| 00:25:17 |
No, you wouldn't. |
| 00:25:19 |
I was referring to the blowtorch. |
| 00:25:21 |
It was a...joke. |
| 00:25:23 |
It was very funny. |
| 00:25:26 |
Can I borrow that? |
| 00:25:39 |
So...do you... |
| 00:25:41 |
go out after work? |
| 00:25:44 |
Is that the sort ofthing you do? |
| 00:25:47 |
Are you going to go to a bar or anything? |
| 00:25:50 |
- No. |
| 00:25:52 |
Good. |
| 00:25:55 |
I'm going back home to Spain |
| 00:25:59 |
Tonight? |
| 00:26:01 |
Yeah. |
| 00:26:04 |
I don't know how I'm going to get there. |
| 00:26:06 |
But I will. |
| 00:26:11 |
Fiesta is wild. |
| 00:26:14 |
People come from miles around |
| 00:26:18 |
And they go crazy. |
| 00:26:20 |
They drink a lot, they dance a lot. |
| 00:26:22 |
They make poo, they make wee. |
| 00:26:25 |
They make love in the street. |
| 00:26:27 |
Wow! |
| 00:26:29 |
Yeah. |
| 00:26:30 |
It sounds awful. |
| 00:26:32 |
Well...it's a good thing |
| 00:26:37 |
Oh, but I mean it sounds fascinating, |
| 00:26:41 |
Oh, anthropologically, it's incredible. |
| 00:26:51 |
Well... |
| 00:26:53 |
I'd better be going. |
| 00:27:03 |
(lamely): See you around. |
| 00:27:06 |
"See you around"? |
| 00:27:07 |
You were gone for ages. |
| 00:27:10 |
(triumphant shout) |
| 00:27:12 |
What are you still doing here? |
| 00:27:16 |
- What could I have done? |
| 00:27:20 |
How would I get a car? |
| 00:27:23 |
Leave that to me. |
| 00:27:25 |
- Bunny... |
| 00:27:29 |
Right! |
| 00:27:31 |
Which one of you tinpot Polacks |
| 00:28:02 |
Jedz. |
| 00:28:22 |
I need fucking lemon! Lemon! |
| 00:28:29 |
(sobs) |
| 00:28:34 |
(cries out) |
| 00:28:38 |
Just one more. |
| 00:28:41 |
Come on! |
| 00:28:50 |
Yeah! |
| 00:28:58 |
(kisses keys) |
| 00:29:05 |
Huh? |
| 00:29:07 |
Who's your daddy? |
| 00:29:09 |
I didn't want a car. |
| 00:29:11 |
You don't know what you want. |
| 00:29:13 |
All right now. Just be cool. |
| 00:29:17 |
- Hey. |
| 00:29:19 |
- Fancy a lift? |
| 00:29:21 |
Oh, I thought you didn't like wine |
| 00:29:27 |
We've had enough ofthe crabs. |
| 00:29:30 |
Yes. |
| 00:29:32 |
OK. |
| 00:29:34 |
Thanks. |
| 00:29:36 |
All right, dude, relax. |
| 00:29:39 |
- Talk to her. You'll be fine. |
| 00:29:41 |
Just don't go into another long rant |
| 00:29:45 |
Right. |
| 00:29:46 |
Girls don't like grammar chat. |
| 00:29:49 |
Oh, and try and keep your lips moist. |
| 00:29:52 |
You have a tendency to get very dry |
| 00:29:56 |
- Do I? |
| 00:29:57 |
Try not to do that thing you do |
| 00:29:59 |
when you clear your throat all the time. |
| 00:30:01 |
- What do you mean? |
| 00:30:03 |
(clears throat) |
| 00:30:06 |
(clears throat) |
| 00:30:08 |
You do do that, dude. Sorry. |
| 00:30:10 |
But whatever you do, |
| 00:30:14 |
What's the Friend Zone? |
| 00:30:16 |
It's nothing to worry about. |
| 00:30:18 |
(starts engine) |
| 00:30:19 |
Right...let's see what this baby can do. |
| 00:30:24 |
(engine splutters and backfires) |
| 00:30:34 |
(clock chimes): |
| 00:30:36 |
Hey, dude. Hey, dude. |
| 00:30:39 |
What? |
| 00:30:40 |
Four o'clock, dude. Nearly time |
| 00:30:45 |
I've had too many of your dead certs. |
| 00:30:47 |
I've won on horses, I've won on crabs. |
| 00:30:50 |
Just nip down the bookies. |
| 00:30:54 |
Unless you can't leave the house. |
| 00:30:56 |
I can. |
| 00:30:57 |
Go on, then. I bet you. |
| 00:31:00 |
All right. |
| 00:31:16 |
(breathes heavily) |
| 00:31:29 |
(thunder-like rumbling) |
| 00:31:59 |
Hey, dude. |
| 00:32:01 |
You weren't gonna leave me |
| 00:32:07 |
Oh, yeah, yeah. |
| 00:32:09 |
I love what you've done with the place, |
| 00:32:12 |
Little tip for you. |
| 00:32:13 |
I think what you need is more boxes |
| 00:32:17 |
It's important to stay organised. |
| 00:32:19 |
I take it you're not entertaining much. |
| 00:32:22 |
Not that women don't love boxes. |
| 00:32:25 |
I mean, what is all this shit? |
| 00:32:27 |
Stamps, rubber bands... |
| 00:32:31 |
..drinking straws '95-'96. |
| 00:32:33 |
Yeah, that was a vintage year |
| 00:32:36 |
- Please, Bunny, just leave them. |
| 00:32:38 |
- Captain Crab. Bingo! |
| 00:32:41 |
Please don't be a vegetarian option. |
| 00:32:43 |
It's not food. |
| 00:32:45 |
Oh, maps. |
| 00:32:48 |
Oh, I remember these. |
| 00:32:56 |
⪠jaunty tune |
| 00:33:59 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:34:01 |
Jesus! |
| 00:34:03 |
I've just worked out |
| 00:34:06 |
I'm gonna win... |
| 00:34:11 |
£3.4 billion. |
| 00:34:14 |
Are you fucking my face? |
| 00:34:16 |
I am not fucking your face. |
| 00:34:18 |
Wow! |
| 00:34:19 |
Obviously they're all long shots, |
| 00:34:25 |
I think you will win. |
| 00:34:27 |
Yeah? Why's that? |
| 00:34:29 |
Because yesterday a gypsy sold me |
| 00:34:33 |
She said it will bring luck to me |
| 00:34:36 |
Maybe you will win £1 billion. |
| 00:34:38 |
- Primo! |
| 00:34:49 |
A rabbit's foot. |
| 00:34:53 |
Yeah. They are very lucky. |
| 00:34:56 |
Not for the rabbit. |
| 00:34:59 |
What? |
| 00:35:00 |
- Let it go, dude. |
| 00:35:03 |
On account ofthe rabbit |
| 00:35:06 |
No, lucky for me. |
| 00:35:08 |
I don't know about the rabbit. |
| 00:35:11 |
Maybe he is happy. |
| 00:35:13 |
A happy hoppy. |
| 00:35:19 |
- Dude... |
| 00:35:22 |
- a dog, kangaroo, a cat... |
| 00:35:24 |
What are you, a silly bottom? |
| 00:35:27 |
In Spain, if you step on a cat, |
| 00:35:29 |
you have to spit on him |
| 00:35:32 |
What? I did that yesterday. |
| 00:35:34 |
- You will die. |
| 00:35:36 |
We've gotta turn around. |
| 00:35:37 |
I'm not turning around |
| 00:35:40 |
- I'm gonna die. |
| 00:35:42 |
Don't worry, I have the San Cristobal. |
| 00:35:44 |
What? |
| 00:35:45 |
If you believe in St Christopher, |
| 00:35:49 |
Oh, thank God. |
| 00:35:51 |
No. |
| 00:35:53 |
Oh, my fucking God. |
| 00:35:55 |
- Have you stolen him? |
| 00:35:58 |
- I haven't taken anything. |
| 00:36:01 |
We have to find it! We need to find it. |
| 00:36:03 |
I don't know if you are really aware |
| 00:36:06 |
Ifwe don't find my St Christopher, |
| 00:36:09 |
- You have to pull over! Pull over, buddy! |
| 00:36:12 |
Stop this! |
| 00:36:15 |
Nobody's going to die of a cat! |
| 00:36:17 |
The only thing that's going to cause |
| 00:36:21 |
Sit down and shut up! |
| 00:36:24 |
I am not pulling over! |
| 00:36:40 |
(indicator clicking) |
| 00:36:44 |
- Why are you pulling over, dude? |
| 00:36:49 |
Bit embarrassing... |
| 00:36:52 |
..after your little speech. |
| 00:36:56 |
(Eloisa mutters to herself) |
| 00:36:59 |
- A quiet word, dude. |
| 00:37:03 |
Why are you fucking this up? |
| 00:37:05 |
Fucking what up? |
| 00:37:07 |
So she's got a few lucky charms. |
| 00:37:11 |
Come on, man. |
| 00:37:13 |
You finally meet someone you stand |
| 00:37:17 |
You crawl straight into the Friend Zone |
| 00:37:21 |
Listen. I'm not interested. OK? |
| 00:37:25 |
Even if I did like her, which I don't, |
| 00:37:29 |
So just back off. OK? |
| 00:37:31 |
All right. |
| 00:37:33 |
Won't say another word. |
| 00:37:39 |
All I'm saying is, we don't want |
| 00:37:42 |
I'm not you, Bunny. |
| 00:37:44 |
I don't have to fuck something |
| 00:37:48 |
OK. Jesus. |
| 00:37:50 |
(bell pings) |
| 00:37:53 |
STEPHEN: |
| 00:37:55 |
He has gone. |
| 00:38:00 |
It's all right. |
| 00:38:03 |
St Stephen will drive. |
| 00:38:54 |
Hm. |
| 00:39:23 |
(jangles) |
| 00:39:29 |
Come on in. |
| 00:39:30 |
Ah, you've got a lovely big bear. |
| 00:39:33 |
- Yes, I'm beating her tomorrow. |
| 00:39:38 |
For being a bad bear. |
| 00:39:41 |
Really? |
| 00:39:42 |
No, you bloody idiot. |
| 00:39:46 |
Come through. You three are upstairs. |
| 00:39:49 |
I don't know who's doing what with whom, |
| 00:39:54 |
(low growl) |
| 00:39:56 |
- Night, dude. |
| 00:39:58 |
- Night. |
| 00:40:01 |
- Good night, baby. |
| 00:40:12 |
⪠Snowing outside |
| 00:40:18 |
⪠In the garden here now |
| 00:40:33 |
⪠A thousand years will pass |
| 00:40:37 |
(sniffs) |
| 00:40:39 |
⪠But still I won't know... |
| 00:40:54 |
ELOISA: |
| 00:40:58 |
- Hey, dude. |
| 00:41:01 |
Hi. |
| 00:41:02 |
Oh. Are you after Eloisa? |
| 00:41:05 |
No, no. No, I just... |
| 00:41:07 |
wondered if you needed |
| 00:41:12 |
Laundry? |
| 00:41:13 |
Yeah. Good idea. |
| 00:41:24 |
Oh. Hang on. |
| 00:41:28 |
Hm... |
| 00:41:31 |
There she is. |
| 00:41:34 |
Great. |
| 00:41:37 |
Well, I'll just go and put a load on. |
| 00:41:41 |
Oh, listen, dude. Erm... |
| 00:41:43 |
You haven't got a johnny, have you? |
| 00:41:45 |
What for? |
| 00:41:47 |
"What for?" |
| 00:41:49 |
Oh, right. Yes. |
| 00:41:50 |
Yeah, I think me and Eloisa |
| 00:41:53 |
get it together. |
| 00:41:56 |
Great. Good. |
| 00:41:58 |
Yep. Well, I do, yes, as a matter offact. |
| 00:42:01 |
(pings) |
| 00:42:02 |
Great. Cheers, buddy. |
| 00:42:04 |
Erm...you haven't got any more, |
| 00:42:08 |
Sure. |
| 00:42:10 |
(pings) |
| 00:42:12 |
Thanks, man. |
| 00:42:14 |
I don't wanna take the piss here, |
| 00:42:17 |
- Why don't you just take the lot? |
| 00:42:19 |
(pinging) |
| 00:42:23 |
Oh, that's brilliant. |
| 00:42:26 |
Hm. |
| 00:42:27 |
Erm...what have you got all these for, dude? |
| 00:42:31 |
Oh, well, |
| 00:42:34 |
you might want to have a...water fight. |
| 00:42:41 |
All right. Come here. |
| 00:42:46 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:42:52 |
- Night, dude. |
| 00:42:56 |
Oh, hey. Maybe we could have |
| 00:43:00 |
- Great. |
| 00:43:01 |
Ifthere's anyjohnnies left! (laughs) |
| 00:43:19 |
Hi, Melanie. Oh...hi, Neil. |
| 00:43:25 |
Sorry, Neil, I know I said |
| 00:43:31 |
Well, send her my...best. |
| 00:43:36 |
(line goes dead) |
| 00:43:47 |
(knock at door) |
| 00:43:49 |
Dude, wake up. |
| 00:43:52 |
What? |
| 00:43:53 |
Got you a present. Come with me. |
| 00:43:58 |
Come along, then, bear. |
| 00:44:01 |
Who are you? |
| 00:44:06 |
BUNNY: You gotta love the bear. |
| 00:44:10 |
Sign of our friendship. |
| 00:44:11 |
But you stole it, Bunny. |
| 00:44:13 |
It's fine. People take shit from hotels |
| 00:44:18 |
(Bunny chuckles) |
| 00:44:22 |
(Bunny whispers and Eloisa laughs) |
| 00:44:32 |
Come on, dude. Put your foot down. |
| 00:44:34 |
The limit's 50. |
| 00:44:35 |
Everyone knows |
| 00:44:37 |
Is true. |
| 00:44:45 |
You're right. |
| 00:44:51 |
(tyres screech) |
| 00:44:58 |
Aah! Fuck. |
| 00:45:00 |
I'm so sorry. |
| 00:45:02 |
This is what happens |
| 00:45:06 |
I know. I'm sorry, really. |
| 00:45:08 |
You were going so slowly. |
| 00:45:10 |
I know. |
| 00:45:13 |
Drunk? |
| 00:45:13 |
- You're drinking and driving? |
| 00:45:15 |
I mean, I had a few last night, |
| 00:45:18 |
- Drinking alone, dude? |
| 00:45:20 |
- I'm pretty sure. |
| 00:45:21 |
Yes. |
| 00:45:22 |
Pretty sure is not good enough, |
| 00:45:25 |
(siren in distance) |
| 00:45:26 |
- Oh, my God. I'm going to prison. |
| 00:45:29 |
I'm going to prison. I'll be raped. |
| 00:45:31 |
- No-one's going to be raped. |
| 00:45:33 |
- These people are Nazis. |
| 00:45:36 |
Their neutrality was a charade. |
| 00:45:39 |
He's right. He's fucked. |
| 00:45:41 |
All right, so we might have |
| 00:45:43 |
Listen. Bunny, will you please tell them |
| 00:45:47 |
- No way, dude. |
| 00:45:49 |
- I'm hammered. |
| 00:45:52 |
- Hey, I'm not driving. |
| 00:46:03 |
- Listen, darling... |
| 00:46:06 |
- No, I'm... |
| 00:46:08 |
Well, maybe slightly, |
| 00:46:12 |
Oh. Hm, OK. |
| 00:46:17 |
So I was driving on ice, I skid, |
| 00:46:21 |
Exactly. Could happen to anyone. |
| 00:46:23 |
- Thank you so much. |
| 00:46:25 |
But you'd better get |
| 00:46:28 |
A woman alone they can believe, |
| 00:46:31 |
Cheers, babe. Listen, see if you can |
| 00:46:35 |
And, ooh, erm...if you pass a bookies, |
| 00:46:39 |
Erm...OK. Here. Just...we're going. |
| 00:46:44 |
See you in town, baby. |
| 00:46:46 |
(shrill whistle) |
| 00:46:47 |
Hey! And take your fucking bear |
| 00:47:01 |
Why do you have to ruin everything? |
| 00:47:03 |
- What the fuck did I do? |
| 00:47:06 |
Everything was just where I wanted it. |
| 00:47:09 |
We're finding loads of great stuff. Look. |
| 00:47:11 |
- Here's all your old combs. |
| 00:47:14 |
- Can I have them? |
| 00:47:26 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:47:30 |
Yes. Hello! Please... |
| 00:47:32 |
Thank you. |
| 00:47:46 |
I need five minutes. |
| 00:47:48 |
- We've got to leave the bear. |
| 00:47:51 |
Then keep moving. |
| 00:48:01 |
Hello. |
| 00:48:04 |
Hello. We're trying to get to town. |
| 00:48:07 |
Do you know anywhere |
| 00:48:11 |
Bus? |
| 00:48:13 |
No. |
| 00:48:15 |
Or a taxi? |
| 00:48:17 |
Taxi? No. |
| 00:48:19 |
Oh, Christ! |
| 00:48:22 |
I like. |
| 00:48:24 |
Very beautiful. |
| 00:48:27 |
Can I have? |
| 00:48:29 |
No, no. Mrs Brown stays with us. |
| 00:48:34 |
Come, come with me. |
| 00:48:36 |
Food, shelter, good times. Come. |
| 00:48:40 |
Follow me. Come along. |
| 00:48:42 |
This right way. Here we go. |
| 00:48:45 |
- I'm not sure about this. |
| 00:48:52 |
Welcome to my home. |
| 00:48:57 |
(barking) |
| 00:49:00 |
Not there! Over there. |
| 00:49:03 |
In lounge. |
| 00:49:10 |
- Here. Drink this. |
| 00:49:17 |
Nice...warm milk. |
| 00:49:19 |
It's delicious. |
| 00:49:21 |
From dog. |
| 00:49:27 |
You not like my milk? |
| 00:49:29 |
No, not at all. |
| 00:49:41 |
This milk from cow. |
| 00:49:49 |
This is Cow. |
| 00:49:53 |
She has most productive teat |
| 00:49:55 |
Ah, great. |
| 00:49:58 |
(slurps and gulps) |
| 00:50:03 |
Mm. Mm. |
| 00:50:05 |
(slurps and gulps) |
| 00:50:07 |
Mm. Mm. |
| 00:50:09 |
Mm! |
| 00:50:12 |
Mm. Mm. (gulps) |
| 00:50:16 |
Ahh... |
| 00:50:18 |
Now you. |
| 00:50:21 |
Ooh, erm...you haven't got anything else, |
| 00:50:32 |
You not like Cow? |
| 00:50:34 |
Not really, no. |
| 00:50:42 |
Can of medium strength lager? |
| 00:50:46 |
Ah, yeah. Great. Thanks. |
| 00:50:48 |
(chuckles) |
| 00:50:51 |
- Cheers. |
| 00:50:54 |
(dogs bark and whine) |
| 00:50:56 |
(strumming on guitar) |
| 00:51:00 |
⪠Mathilda goes woof! |
| 00:51:01 |
(barks) |
| 00:51:03 |
⪠Svetlana say woof! |
| 00:51:05 |
(barks) |
| 00:51:07 |
Ah, good times! |
| 00:51:09 |
(continues singing) |
| 00:51:11 |
After I'd been sick a couple oftimes, |
| 00:51:15 |
- Not bad, these dogs. |
| 00:51:18 |
We ought to push off. |
| 00:51:20 |
We're gonna have to say goodbye, |
| 00:51:24 |
(clattering) |
| 00:51:26 |
(barking and whining) |
| 00:51:29 |
I see what is going on here. |
| 00:51:32 |
Yeah. All night I watch you. |
| 00:51:33 |
Flirting. |
| 00:51:35 |
What are you talking about? |
| 00:51:37 |
And now you want to fuck her, huh? |
| 00:51:40 |
Your dog? |
| 00:51:41 |
(barking) |
| 00:51:42 |
Shut your mouth, you tainted bitch! |
| 00:51:44 |
Honestly, |
| 00:51:47 |
Then why you make explosion |
| 00:51:50 |
Oh, dude. |
| 00:51:52 |
Jesus. |
| 00:51:53 |
I'm sorry. It was cold, |
| 00:51:56 |
I don't know. |
| 00:51:58 |
You fuck my wife, huh? |
| 00:52:00 |
I fuck your wife. |
| 00:52:02 |
I haven't got a wife. |
| 00:52:05 |
And who is this beautiful woman here? |
| 00:52:08 |
Hey. You keep your hands off her. |
| 00:52:12 |
Oh, big man, huh? |
| 00:52:15 |
Big curly man. |
| 00:52:17 |
You gonna fight me for her? (laughs) |
| 00:52:19 |
I'll bet you for her. |
| 00:52:21 |
Bet? |
| 00:52:23 |
Yeah, you know, |
| 00:52:25 |
Dice? Couple of conkers? |
| 00:52:28 |
I don't play these games. |
| 00:52:31 |
All right, then. |
| 00:52:34 |
See that island over there? |
| 00:52:36 |
I bet I can swim to that island |
| 00:52:42 |
This is impossible. |
| 00:52:43 |
- No man can do this. |
| 00:52:46 |
And if I make it, we keep the bear. |
| 00:52:48 |
If not... |
| 00:52:51 |
..you may do with her as you wish. |
| 00:52:52 |
Hm. |
| 00:52:54 |
Just a quick word. |
| 00:52:55 |
- Mm-hm? |
| 00:52:59 |
You can do this, can't you? |
| 00:53:01 |
Well, I don't know. That's why it's a bet. |
| 00:53:06 |
Deal? (spits) |
| 00:53:10 |
(spits) |
| 00:53:12 |
Deal. |
| 00:53:16 |
Mm. Good strong arms. |
| 00:53:18 |
Perhaps we will be fucking later. |
| 00:53:35 |
(dog panting) |
| 00:53:39 |
(whines) |
| 00:53:43 |
She loves you. |
| 00:53:46 |
That's nice. |
| 00:53:50 |
Who am I to stand in the way of love? |
| 00:53:55 |
You would like to lie with her, yes? |
| 00:53:58 |
Maybe later. |
| 00:54:00 |
She is warm and clean. |
| 00:54:09 |
(gasping) |
| 00:54:10 |
How are you feeling? |
| 00:54:12 |
(wheezes) |
| 00:54:18 |
Your friend is dead. |
| 00:54:20 |
Drowned. I'm sorry. |
| 00:54:23 |
It is you and I now. |
| 00:54:26 |
There is nothing we can do for him. |
| 00:54:28 |
(whimpers) |
| 00:54:55 |
(panting) |
| 00:55:00 |
(Bunny wheezes and laughs) |
| 00:55:09 |
BUNNY: |
| 00:55:12 |
Keep going, we're nearly there. |
| 00:55:14 |
Incredible! |
| 00:55:15 |
One man risking his life, |
| 00:55:18 |
(chuckles) |
| 00:55:20 |
Mm? |
| 00:55:21 |
Two men risked their lives. |
| 00:55:23 |
Yeah. |
| 00:55:24 |
I'm telling you, buddy, |
| 00:55:26 |
there's no way back from here. |
| 00:55:28 |
I feel like I've finally become a man. |
| 00:55:30 |
(grunts) Real man! |
| 00:55:32 |
(car horn blares) |
| 00:55:33 |
Oh, my God, |
| 00:55:37 |
Where the fuck have you two been? |
| 00:55:40 |
Are we going to this fiesta or not? |
| 00:55:42 |
Just a sec, baby. Listen. |
| 00:55:44 |
I won't be pissing around |
| 00:55:46 |
I'm raising the stakes. |
| 00:55:49 |
I'm gonna fight a bull. |
| 00:55:59 |
If you really want to be a toreador, |
| 00:56:01 |
you should talk to my brother. |
| 00:56:03 |
Cos I remember, |
| 00:56:05 |
all he would ever talk about |
| 00:56:08 |
Wow. It sounds great. |
| 00:56:10 |
He's technically retarded. |
| 00:56:12 |
- Oh. |
| 00:56:15 |
Bullfighting is fun. |
| 00:56:16 |
There's plenty we can do that doesn't |
| 00:56:20 |
You're so naive. |
| 00:56:22 |
Name me one thing |
| 00:56:24 |
as doing battle with an angry cow. |
| 00:56:26 |
- Fairground. |
| 00:56:29 |
I love fairgrounds. |
| 00:56:32 |
- Cool. |
| 00:56:35 |
Who said you get to decide |
| 00:56:37 |
If you two want to go to a fairground, |
| 00:56:40 |
But count me out. |
| 00:56:43 |
I'm in training. |
| 00:56:47 |
Olé! |
| 00:56:54 |
(clock chimes) |
| 00:57:19 |
Come on, you'll like this. |
| 00:57:21 |
OK. |
| 00:57:28 |
(low chatter and laughter) |
| 00:57:33 |
(machinery clanks) |
| 00:57:35 |
What's going on? |
| 00:57:37 |
Don't worry, it's an old ride. |
| 00:57:39 |
(clanking) |
| 00:57:41 |
No, it's fine. |
| 00:57:43 |
Listen, there's... |
| 00:57:45 |
(machinery powers down) |
| 00:57:47 |
ELOISA: |
| 00:57:52 |
What do we do? |
| 00:57:54 |
I don't know. |
| 00:57:57 |
Have a drink? |
| 00:57:59 |
We might be a while. |
| 00:58:01 |
You want? |
| 00:58:03 |
No, thanks, I've got my own. |
| 00:58:14 |
What are those things? |
| 00:58:16 |
You should try one. |
| 00:58:18 |
I don't know. |
| 00:58:20 |
You'll like it. |
| 00:58:22 |
It's very blue. |
| 00:58:25 |
Mm-hm, and very tasty. |
| 00:58:29 |
ELOISA: |
| 00:58:32 |
⪠De la cama, dáte pim pom |
| 00:58:34 |
⪠De la cama, dáte pim pom... |
| 00:58:39 |
(giggles) |
| 00:58:46 |
So... |
| 00:58:48 |
you must be looking forward |
| 00:58:50 |
Yes. |
| 00:58:53 |
I never wanted to go travelling |
| 00:58:57 |
So why did you? |
| 00:58:59 |
It wasn't my idea. |
| 00:59:01 |
It was Concita. |
| 00:59:03 |
Who's Concita? |
| 00:59:07 |
OK, so one night in the fiesta, |
| 00:59:12 |
..15, |
| 00:59:14 |
I had lots of drinks, lots oftrippies, |
| 00:59:17 |
and I was walking home alone. |
| 00:59:19 |
And my shadow froze... |
| 00:59:21 |
like this. |
| 00:59:25 |
So I said, "Hey, are you going |
| 00:59:30 |
And my shadow... |
| 00:59:32 |
does this. |
| 00:59:35 |
And I do this. |
| 00:59:37 |
She was like... |
| 00:59:39 |
I was like... |
| 00:59:40 |
We were like... |
| 00:59:44 |
..for three hours. |
| 00:59:49 |
It wasn't as much fun |
| 00:59:52 |
This is Concita. |
| 00:59:55 |
The first time I see her. |
| 00:59:57 |
Right. |
| 00:59:59 |
Hm. |
| 01:00:00 |
After this, I start to see her many times. |
| 01:00:04 |
And she says |
| 01:00:08 |
what places I should go, |
| 01:00:13 |
Everything. |
| 01:00:15 |
And she took me to Poland. |
| 01:00:19 |
But she's a hallucination. |
| 01:00:21 |
No, Concita is real. |
| 01:00:23 |
Concita is always with me. |
| 01:00:25 |
Is she here now? |
| 01:00:28 |
No. |
| 01:00:30 |
She doesn't like you. |
| 01:00:33 |
She's on the dodgems. |
| 01:00:35 |
What did I do? |
| 01:00:38 |
Nothing. You're really nice. |
| 01:00:40 |
But she sees you more like a... |
| 01:00:43 |
You know, like a brother... |
| 01:00:45 |
or a gaylord. |
| 01:00:47 |
Right. |
| 01:00:49 |
Does she like Bunny? |
| 01:00:51 |
Yes. |
| 01:00:54 |
She loves Bunny. |
| 01:00:56 |
She thinks he's... |
| 01:00:58 |
hot stuff. |
| 01:01:01 |
Right. |
| 01:01:04 |
Sometimes I think |
| 01:01:10 |
(machinery starts up) |
| 01:01:13 |
Home time. Here we go. |
| 01:02:11 |
(train rumbles past) |
| 01:02:15 |
At last! Where the hell have you been? |
| 01:02:19 |
- Food! |
| 01:02:21 |
- Bowl for dog! |
| 01:02:29 |
- Bloodyjunkie! |
| 01:02:32 |
- She's a figment of your imagination. |
| 01:02:35 |
- Yeah, we're all in his head. |
| 01:02:38 |
What do you think you're doing here? |
| 01:02:41 |
Holiday? Good times? |
| 01:02:43 |
Holiday? You think they'd let you |
| 01:02:49 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:02:54 |
Come on, dude. We're having fun. |
| 01:03:13 |
(breathes deeply) |
| 01:04:20 |
Come on, dude. Let's hit the bars. |
| 01:04:22 |
Stephen, come with us to the fiesta. |
| 01:04:25 |
Ooh! |
| 01:04:28 |
Yeah, I'm going to introduce you |
| 01:04:31 |
Paulo. |
| 01:04:50 |
Hey, Javier! |
| 01:04:52 |
It's my beautiful sister! |
| 01:04:54 |
(chuckles) |
| 01:04:55 |
Look at you. |
| 01:04:57 |
You look wonderful. |
| 01:04:59 |
Do you think she looks sexy? |
| 01:05:01 |
Si. |
| 01:05:03 |
How dare you? She's only 23. |
| 01:05:05 |
Get the hell out of my bar, filthy pervert. |
| 01:05:10 |
Que haces, Javier? |
| 01:05:12 |
A small amount for medicinal purposes. |
| 01:05:15 |
Que no deberÃas beber. |
| 01:05:17 |
The doctor! (spits) Eurgh. |
| 01:05:20 |
Huh! |
| 01:05:21 |
Maybe I could get you a lime and soda. |
| 01:05:23 |
(music stops) |
| 01:05:29 |
Oh, yes, that would be very lovely. |
| 01:05:31 |
Very refreshing on a hot day like today. |
| 01:05:35 |
(music starts up) |
| 01:05:37 |
Which one ofyou is making |
| 01:05:41 |
That's me, matador. |
| 01:05:43 |
It's been a long time since anyone |
| 01:05:46 |
I once dreamed of becoming |
| 01:05:49 |
But... |
| 01:05:51 |
sadly... |
| 01:05:53 |
Ah...gored in the leg. |
| 01:05:57 |
I fell back onto a coffee table. |
| 01:06:00 |
Oh, right. |
| 01:06:02 |
Erm...but you have fought bulls, yeah? |
| 01:06:05 |
Only you English call it fighting. |
| 01:06:07 |
For us in Spain, it is a dance. |
| 01:06:10 |
A dance? |
| 01:06:12 |
You see, when the matador |
| 01:06:15 |
there is a moment when |
| 01:06:19 |
and the bull looks up at the matador, |
| 01:06:21 |
and the matador looks down at the bull. |
| 01:06:24 |
And the bull rises up onto his hind legs, |
| 01:06:29 |
grabs the matador close |
| 01:06:32 |
and for a moment they dance... |
| 01:06:34 |
in only the way a bull and a man |
| 01:06:39 |
Yes, my friend. |
| 01:06:40 |
It's not a fight. It is a dance. |
| 01:06:44 |
(Stephen clears his throat) |
| 01:06:45 |
I thought the main attraction |
| 01:06:48 |
was the sight of a defenceless animal |
| 01:06:56 |
It is a peculiar dance, I'll give you this. |
| 01:06:58 |
But it is a dance, nevertheless. |
| 01:07:07 |
JAVIER: |
| 01:07:10 |
the greatest bullfighter who ever lived. |
| 01:07:14 |
He tried to retire many times. |
| 01:07:17 |
But he could not stop. |
| 01:07:20 |
Even on his 69th birthday, |
| 01:07:25 |
He asks his friends to bring him one. |
| 01:07:28 |
But they fear he will be killed |
| 01:07:30 |
and so they make excuses. |
| 01:07:33 |
And they bring him a small one. |
| 01:07:35 |
They say, "Juan, er... |
| 01:07:41 |
But he knows in his heart... |
| 01:07:44 |
his life as a torero is over. |
| 01:07:48 |
So this night... |
| 01:07:51 |
he drinks three bottles ofwine... |
| 01:07:54 |
..makes love with two womans... |
| 01:07:57 |
..takes a gun... |
| 01:07:59 |
and he shoots himself. |
| 01:08:08 |
This is what it means to be a matador. |
| 01:08:12 |
Wow. |
| 01:08:16 |
Can I try it on? |
| 01:08:18 |
Maybe in ten years, when you have |
| 01:08:22 |
Then you'll come back, |
| 01:08:25 |
and you can maybe touch... |
| 01:08:27 |
the hem ofthe inside pocket. |
| 01:08:32 |
Will you teach me? |
| 01:08:34 |
No. |
| 01:08:36 |
Hm. |
| 01:08:38 |
Hip flask oftequila? |
| 01:08:42 |
Meet me in the car park at midnight. |
| 01:08:46 |
(clock chimes) |
| 01:08:54 |
Because ofthe complicated techniques |
| 01:08:58 |
it can take up to ten years |
| 01:09:02 |
Unfortunately, we only have ten minutes, |
| 01:09:05 |
as I have to pick up my auntie |
| 01:09:08 |
I know what you are thinking - |
| 01:09:11 |
Well, think again. |
| 01:09:15 |
Huh? |
| 01:09:16 |
Now, much has been written |
| 01:09:20 |
But I can sum it up in one sentence. |
| 01:09:23 |
"Get out ofthe way ofthe bull, you idiot! |
| 01:09:25 |
Otherwise he will rip open your anus, |
| 01:09:28 |
like it was a cheap Velcro wallet." |
| 01:09:31 |
I will now become the bull. |
| 01:09:41 |
(bellows) |
| 01:09:43 |
Like this! |
| 01:09:44 |
Ha ha! |
| 01:09:46 |
Whoargh! |
| 01:09:48 |
(car alarm blares) |
| 01:09:52 |
(cries out) |
| 01:09:54 |
What are you doing? |
| 01:09:56 |
Use the cape! Fucking idiot! |
| 01:09:59 |
What are you, |
| 01:10:01 |
Cover his head! Eloisa! |
| 01:10:04 |
Eloisa, go and get your auntie. |
| 01:10:06 |
She's at Terminal 4. |
| 01:10:08 |
(groans) |
| 01:10:21 |
I've been wanting to say thank you |
| 01:10:26 |
Oh. |
| 01:10:27 |
Yeah, I...I sort of guessed |
| 01:10:31 |
when he tried to put it |
| 01:10:35 |
Well... |
| 01:10:37 |
you're welcome. |
| 01:10:39 |
Thank you. |
| 01:10:42 |
So...where do you see |
| 01:10:48 |
Well... |
| 01:10:49 |
I don't think Bunny is the sort of person |
| 01:10:53 |
Yeah. |
| 01:10:54 |
You know... |
| 01:10:55 |
Concita always said |
| 01:11:00 |
13 would be very bad luck. |
| 01:11:03 |
And Pawel was number 12. |
| 01:11:05 |
That's why I stayed in Poland, |
| 01:11:09 |
donkey-fucking prick. |
| 01:11:12 |
But then... |
| 01:11:15 |
I start to think |
| 01:11:19 |
Maybe she is just scared of number 13. |
| 01:11:24 |
Maybe I'm scared of number 13. |
| 01:11:29 |
Maybe. |
| 01:11:34 |
Anyway... |
| 01:11:36 |
I realise, once I get over number 13, |
| 01:11:40 |
I can start looking again. |
| 01:11:43 |
Bunny is a perfect number 13. |
| 01:12:22 |
I should go and find Bunny. |
| 01:12:27 |
OK. |
| 01:12:32 |
Buenas noches. |
| 01:12:36 |
Good night. |
| 01:12:40 |
Hey. |
| 01:12:59 |
Put it back. |
| 01:13:01 |
If you want to be a bullfighter, |
| 01:13:04 |
I'll put it back when I've done it. |
| 01:13:06 |
You're not going to fight a bull, Bunny. |
| 01:13:09 |
I most certainly am. Why not? |
| 01:13:12 |
Because it's dangerous |
| 01:13:15 |
I don't want to kill it. |
| 01:13:17 |
I just want to have |
| 01:13:21 |
It's not the bull I'm worried about. |
| 01:13:23 |
OK? |
| 01:13:24 |
Why are you always beefing on |
| 01:13:27 |
Just trying to stop you doing something |
| 01:13:31 |
No, you're not. You've been boring |
| 01:13:35 |
You used to be fun. |
| 01:13:38 |
Yeah, well... |
| 01:13:42 |
There is something. |
| 01:13:44 |
Oh, finally. Come on, then. |
| 01:13:49 |
I'm in love with someone. |
| 01:13:51 |
Yeah, I know. Melanie. |
| 01:13:53 |
No, not Melanie. |
| 01:13:58 |
Someone else. |
| 01:14:03 |
Oh, right. |
| 01:14:06 |
Yeah. |
| 01:14:10 |
Yeah, um... |
| 01:14:14 |
Oh, man. I'm sorry, Stephen. |
| 01:14:18 |
I guess it's a... |
| 01:14:21 |
..bit awkward. |
| 01:14:25 |
I know. |
| 01:14:28 |
I mean, I'm flattered. |
| 01:14:30 |
What? |
| 01:14:31 |
I'll do snogsies for the wank bank, but |
| 01:14:36 |
- That's so messy. |
| 01:14:38 |
Oh, thank God! |
| 01:14:41 |
Not everyone wants to |
| 01:14:44 |
Or are you so profoundly... |
| 01:14:48 |
- You know what? It doesn't matter. |
| 01:14:52 |
You may as well talk down to me |
| 01:14:57 |
Can you name one thing you've ever |
| 01:15:01 |
Yeah, loads. |
| 01:15:03 |
Go on, then. |
| 01:15:05 |
Not offthe top of my head. |
| 01:15:07 |
Thank you. |
| 01:15:09 |
At least I do something. |
| 01:15:11 |
At least I didn't spend three years |
| 01:15:14 |
who isn't even that good in the sack. |
| 01:15:22 |
What? |
| 01:15:23 |
Hm? |
| 01:15:25 |
Well, yeah. |
| 01:15:27 |
You spent so long banging on about her, |
| 01:15:31 |
Let me tell you, |
| 01:15:33 |
(chuckles) |
| 01:15:35 |
You're not missing out on anything there, |
| 01:15:39 |
You're unbelievable. |
| 01:15:41 |
Do you know what? I'm fucking sick |
| 01:15:45 |
If I wanna borrow this suit, |
| 01:15:48 |
If I wanna fight a bull, then I will. |
| 01:15:50 |
And if some hombre's caught your eye, |
| 01:15:54 |
No-one's gonna judge you here, dude. |
| 01:15:56 |
This is Spain. |
| 01:15:58 |
Let's all just do what we want, shall we? |
| 01:16:00 |
Deal. |
| 01:16:01 |
(spits) |
| 01:16:04 |
(train speeds past) |
| 01:17:02 |
(sexual moaning) |
| 01:17:04 |
Hey, dude. Hope you're cool with this. |
| 01:17:07 |
Just doing what I want. |
| 01:17:08 |
Sorry. |
| 01:17:10 |
There was nothing I could do. |
| 01:17:13 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:17:15 |
Ooh! Ooh! |
| 01:17:18 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:17:20 |
She real slut. |
| 01:17:22 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:17:33 |
Mm. |
| 01:17:34 |
Stephen. |
| 01:17:37 |
Everything all right? |
| 01:17:55 |
STEPHEN: Hang on. |
| 01:18:03 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:06 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:18:08 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:10 |
Good size, good weight. |
| 01:18:12 |
It's much better than Bunny's. |
| 01:18:15 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:18:17 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:19 |
STEPHEN: I'd rather not think about him |
| 01:18:25 |
(Eloisa laughs) |
| 01:18:27 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:18:29 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:31 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:18:33 |
(condom dispenser bell dings) |
| 01:18:37 |
Here goes. |
| 01:18:39 |
(moans) |
| 01:18:46 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:49 |
- Bunny! |
| 01:18:52 |
It's coming out. Mm-hm. Yeah, funny. |
| 01:18:54 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:18:56 |
Really, Stephen... |
| 01:18:58 |
this is nice. |
| 01:19:00 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:19:03 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:19:07 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:19:10 |
Dude! |
| 01:19:16 |
Dude. |
| 01:19:18 |
So you finally got your balls in. |
| 01:19:21 |
What? |
| 01:19:24 |
Oh, God. |
| 01:19:26 |
Yeah, Bunny, look, I'm really sorry. |
| 01:19:28 |
Itjust happened. I didn't mean... |
| 01:19:31 |
Well, I did mean for it to happen, |
| 01:19:34 |
Sshh! |
| 01:19:35 |
Hey, it's fine. |
| 01:19:38 |
It's not as if she's my girlfriend. |
| 01:19:40 |
Really? |
| 01:19:42 |
Yeah. |
| 01:19:44 |
It's what we came here for, isn't it? |
| 01:19:47 |
Proud of you, man. |
| 01:19:52 |
Thanks. |
| 01:19:53 |
Hey...that's what friends are for, dude. |
| 01:19:58 |
Mmm. |
| 01:20:08 |
Bunny? |
| 01:20:09 |
Mm-hm? |
| 01:20:12 |
Why is your face so close to mine? |
| 01:20:15 |
What you talking about? |
| 01:20:17 |
It's unnaturally close. |
| 01:20:20 |
Yeah, this is what's wrong |
| 01:20:23 |
A couple of buddies can't cuddle up |
| 01:20:27 |
without tongues wagging, |
| 01:20:29 |
people judging... |
| 01:20:31 |
- Have you been drinking? |
| 01:20:34 |
Look, Bunny, |
| 01:20:39 |
Oh, my God. Why are you naked? |
| 01:20:41 |
Erm... |
| 01:20:42 |
Yeah, I had a bit of bad luck. |
| 01:20:45 |
What happened? |
| 01:20:47 |
Where's the suit? |
| 01:20:49 |
I can't lie to you, dude. |
| 01:20:51 |
I lost it to a fat gypsy. |
| 01:20:53 |
What? |
| 01:20:54 |
It wasn't my fault. He cheated. |
| 01:20:57 |
Well, I'm pretty sure he cheated. |
| 01:20:59 |
Either that |
| 01:21:02 |
- You've got to get it back. |
| 01:21:04 |
The fucker wouldn't |
| 01:21:06 |
Technically that's not even |
| 01:21:08 |
But you try reasoning with |
| 01:21:12 |
- It can't be done, dude. |
| 01:21:15 |
- I know. |
| 01:21:16 |
(softly): I know he's gonna go mental. |
| 01:21:19 |
That's why we've gotta get out of here |
| 01:21:25 |
I'm not going, |
| 01:21:27 |
Bunny. |
| 01:21:31 |
What? |
| 01:21:34 |
Sorry. |
| 01:21:35 |
Oh, come on, buddy. |
| 01:21:39 |
You've gotta help me out here. |
| 01:21:42 |
I'm staying. |
| 01:21:47 |
You can't abandon me. |
| 01:21:50 |
Look at me. |
| 01:21:53 |
I need you. |
| 01:22:01 |
I'm sorry. |
| 01:22:05 |
At least give me some pants. |
| 01:22:07 |
And buy me a train ticket. |
| 01:22:11 |
Give me some pants, dude. |
| 01:22:14 |
Give me some pants! |
| 01:22:18 |
(ticking) |
| 01:22:23 |
Train's not for a couple of hours. |
| 01:22:32 |
Sure I can't tempt you |
| 01:22:36 |
I've got to go, Bunny. |
| 01:22:39 |
I want to be there when she wakes up. |
| 01:22:42 |
Explain what's happened. |
| 01:22:45 |
Look, why don't I give her a call? |
| 01:22:48 |
Bunny, don't. |
| 01:22:50 |
Seriously, I'll explain what happened. |
| 01:22:53 |
I'll smooth things over. It'll be fine. |
| 01:22:55 |
Really. |
| 01:22:58 |
Please. |
| 01:23:02 |
OK. |
| 01:23:06 |
Well... |
| 01:23:09 |
Have a good trip. |
| 01:23:12 |
Yeah, you too. |
| 01:23:16 |
I hope everything works out for you. |
| 01:23:25 |
(phone ringing tone) |
| 01:23:30 |
- Si? |
| 01:23:32 |
It's Bunny. |
| 01:23:34 |
Listen, |
| 01:23:37 |
About your brother's suit. |
| 01:23:39 |
STEPHEN: |
| 01:23:43 |
What's up? |
| 01:23:45 |
I just spoke to Bunny. |
| 01:23:47 |
- He told me everything. |
| 01:23:53 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:23:54 |
ELOISA: |
| 01:23:56 |
BUNNY: |
| 01:23:59 |
Hey, buddy. |
| 01:24:20 |
(metallic squeaking) |
| 01:24:29 |
I can't believe |
| 01:24:34 |
I fessed up and everything. |
| 01:24:36 |
Hm. Guilt by association, I suppose. |
| 01:24:43 |
I mean, there were a couple ofthings |
| 01:24:45 |
I could have been clearer on, |
| 01:24:50 |
You know, very crackly. |
| 01:24:52 |
And I was very drunk. |
| 01:24:54 |
Throw all that into the equation... |
| 01:24:57 |
..whole thing was a bit of a blur, |
| 01:25:00 |
The important thing is, |
| 01:25:03 |
Boys on the train. |
| 01:25:07 |
Olive? |
| 01:25:10 |
Come on. |
| 01:25:12 |
No? |
| 01:25:14 |
Oh. |
| 01:25:16 |
Come on. Chin up, dude. |
| 01:25:18 |
You'll be over her in no time. |
| 01:25:20 |
I mean, honestly, hand on heart, |
| 01:25:23 |
can you even remember |
| 01:25:26 |
I know I can't. |
| 01:25:28 |
And I was closer to her face |
| 01:25:31 |
Not to put too fine a point on it, but... |
| 01:25:34 |
We both know what I'm talking about. |
| 01:25:36 |
There's no need to dwell on that |
| 01:25:39 |
Yeah. Yeah. |
| 01:25:43 |
Tell you what, |
| 01:25:45 |
Anywhere you want. |
| 01:25:47 |
No. Listen to me, being insensitive. |
| 01:25:50 |
I'll choose. |
| 01:25:51 |
Let Bunny take charge for a change. |
| 01:25:55 |
Here we go. |
| 01:25:57 |
What is it you actually do, Bunny? |
| 01:25:59 |
You talk about me not doing anything, |
| 01:26:04 |
You go to Spain to fight a bull |
| 01:26:06 |
You get pissed, |
| 01:26:08 |
fuck around in a car park, nick a suit, |
| 01:26:12 |
- You want me to fight a bull? |
| 01:26:14 |
- I'll fight a bull now. |
| 01:26:16 |
I thought you said it was dangerous |
| 01:26:20 |
There's bulls out there now. |
| 01:26:23 |
Let's go, amigo. |
| 01:26:24 |
- I don't... |
| 01:26:34 |
I don't want to do this any more. |
| 01:26:36 |
You can't help it. |
| 01:26:38 |
I want to go home. |
| 01:26:40 |
(cuckoo clock chiming) |
| 01:26:59 |
Hey, whoa. Stop. |
| 01:27:01 |
There's one. Got him. |
| 01:27:03 |
This is fucking ridiculous. Let's go back. |
| 01:27:05 |
No, no. I'm going to fight this bull. |
| 01:27:07 |
I'm not going to save you, Bunny. |
| 01:27:09 |
You won't have to. |
| 01:27:22 |
Hey. |
| 01:27:25 |
Toro! |
| 01:27:31 |
- Have I missed anything? |
| 01:27:34 |
Toro! |
| 01:27:50 |
(clanging) |
| 01:28:03 |
Again. |
| 01:28:04 |
(snorts) |
| 01:29:33 |
(metal creaks) |
| 01:29:40 |
(exhales heavily) |
| 01:29:41 |
Not long to go now, buddy. |
| 01:29:53 |
Come on. |
| 01:29:55 |
(panting) |
| 01:30:14 |
(wheezes) |
| 01:32:22 |
(sobs softly) |
| 01:33:02 |
I'm sorry. |
| 01:33:04 |
What for? |
| 01:33:06 |
I should have stopped you. |
| 01:33:08 |
You couldn't have. |
| 01:33:11 |
Anyway, it was a pretty good way to go. |
| 01:33:14 |
Gored by a bull. |
| 01:33:17 |
I mean, I had always hoped |
| 01:33:20 |
or gunned down by some demented fan. |
| 01:33:23 |
But erm...I'll take a bull. |
| 01:33:26 |
It was a great bet. |
| 01:33:33 |
You wanna do something for me? |
| 01:33:37 |
Have you any idea ofthe mileage |
| 01:33:40 |
"Hi, my name's Stephen." |
| 01:33:42 |
(clears throat) |
| 01:33:44 |
"My best friend just died. |
| 01:33:50 |
Hooh! Bim-bim-bim! |
| 01:33:52 |
Balls in, balls in, balls in. |
| 01:33:54 |
Fun time! Hm-mm, hm-mm. |
| 01:34:01 |
If you'd have been killed, I'd have |
| 01:34:04 |
I don't want to shag a thousand women. |
| 01:34:07 |
Apart from Eloisa. |
| 01:34:10 |
(groans) |
| 01:34:11 |
I haven't spoken to her in a year. |
| 01:34:14 |
Last time she saw me, |
| 01:34:17 |
You can talk her round. |
| 01:34:19 |
I wouldn't even know what to say. |
| 01:34:22 |
Just tell her that I died |
| 01:34:25 |
and you had a really tough time |
| 01:34:28 |
and... |
| 01:34:29 |
you hope that somehow |
| 01:34:32 |
Boom! Boom-boom-boom. |
| 01:34:35 |
Naughty, naughty, naughty. |
| 01:34:36 |
Boom-boom-boom. |
| 01:34:42 |
At least give her a call. |
| 01:34:48 |
(speech drowned by music) |
| 01:35:45 |
Have a good trip. |
| 01:35:47 |
You not coming? |
| 01:35:50 |
No. |
| 01:35:52 |
I don't think that's the deal. |
| 01:35:56 |
I'll miss you. |
| 01:35:58 |
Listen... |
| 01:36:00 |
Will you do one last thing for me? |
| 01:36:03 |
Yeah, of course. |
| 01:36:08 |
(sighs) |
| 01:36:09 |
What? Anything. |
| 01:36:14 |
There's a horse running in the 5:05 |
| 01:36:18 |
It's lost its last three races, |
| 01:36:22 |
He's blinkered for the first time. |
| 01:36:26 |
- How much? |
| 01:36:29 |
Put the house on it. It's a shoo-in. |
| 01:36:32 |
Well, got to be at least worth a fiver. |
| 01:36:38 |
OK. |
| 01:36:42 |
Well...you ready? |
| 01:36:46 |
(exhales heavily) |
| 01:36:48 |
Yeah. |
| 01:36:53 |
⪠LOVE: |
| 01:37:10 |
⪠Yeah |
| 01:37:11 |
⪠I said it's all right |
| 01:37:14 |
⪠I won't forget |
| 01:37:17 |
⪠All the times |
| 01:37:24 |
⪠And you'll do |
| 01:37:31 |
⪠And I will be alone again tonight, |
| 01:37:55 |
⪠Yeah |
| 01:37:57 |
⪠I heard a funny thing |
| 01:38:00 |
⪠Somebody said to me |
| 01:38:03 |
⪠You know that I could be in love |
| 01:38:09 |
⪠I think that people are the greatest fun |
| 01:38:16 |
⪠And I will be alone again tonight, |
| 01:39:26 |
⪠Yeah |
| 01:39:28 |
⪠I heard a funny thing |
| 01:39:31 |
⪠Somebody said to me |
| 01:39:34 |
⪠You know that I could be in love |
| 01:39:40 |
⪠I think that people are the greatest fun |
