Dan In Real Life
|
00:01:13 |
OK. |
00:01:56 |
- ls this yours? |
00:01:59 |
Didn't think so. |
00:02:15 |
Hey,l was gonna do that for you later. |
00:02:18 |
Now you won't have to. |
00:02:21 |
- OK.OK,are you hungry? |
00:02:24 |
Cereal? |
00:02:25 |
- OK. |
00:02:27 |
- So the plan... |
00:02:30 |
Cara,Dad's about to reveal ''the plan.'' |
00:02:32 |
l'll pack up the car,pick |
00:02:35 |
and then we'll drive straight...through. |
00:02:40 |
Sounds good. |
00:02:42 |
- Does not. |
00:02:44 |
Well,isn't the whole |
00:02:46 |
You're forcing us to miss school |
00:02:50 |
Right? l mean,what about my studies? |
00:02:53 |
OK,why are you smiling? |
00:02:55 |
l just never thought l'd hear |
00:02:58 |
lt makes me,like,smile. |
00:03:03 |
l don't wanna go. |
00:03:04 |
We do this every year. |
00:03:05 |
Only time we can get |
00:03:07 |
- Gotta help Grandma and Grandpa******* |
00:03:10 |
You're destroying my education. |
00:03:12 |
******Change. |
00:03:16 |
Yes? |
00:03:17 |
Very good column,sir. That |
00:03:20 |
And may l also say that yesterday's |
00:03:23 |
Who are you? |
00:03:24 |
l'm Marty Barasco. l would like to |
00:03:29 |
lt helped me understand my parents. |
00:03:31 |
OK. |
00:03:33 |
Well,Marty,what else can l do for you? |
00:03:35 |
l'd like to see your |
00:03:39 |
Jane. Jane! |
00:03:41 |
Actually,l'm here for Cara. |
00:03:45 |
Nice to meet you,Marty. |
00:03:51 |
l don't wanna brag,but Mr. Shaff says |
00:03:54 |
He says l'm highway ready. |
00:03:56 |
Mr. Shaff and l may not |
00:03:58 |
So will you let me? |
00:03:59 |
We'll see. 3pm sharp. |
00:04:01 |
- Do not be... |
00:04:04 |
- late. |
00:04:06 |
FYl,that boy you were really |
00:04:10 |
my lab partner from class. We're |
00:04:14 |
Bus. |
00:04:17 |
- Wait!Wait,wait,wait! |
00:04:18 |
Hurry up! |
00:05:04 |
Yeah? |
00:05:06 |
Yeah,Jordy,l e-mailed |
00:05:09 |
What? |
00:05:12 |
No way. You're kidding. |
00:05:23 |
That's funny. |
00:05:24 |
Where's your sister? |
00:05:26 |
You're late. |
00:05:27 |
She went to Yumms. |
00:05:29 |
Can l drive? |
00:05:30 |
Dad's going to be syndicated. |
00:05:32 |
Not so fast. There're |
00:05:35 |
Aw,that's great. Can l drive? |
00:05:45 |
Look. You're a fine driver. |
00:05:47 |
- lt's the just the other hundred million dr... |
00:05:51 |
But if l let you,you may not live. |
00:06:30 |
What was that? What are you doing? |
00:06:32 |
- Could you be more embarrassing? |
00:06:35 |
Well,we can't all be monks like you. No. |
00:06:40 |
By the way,you're grounded. |
00:06:41 |
- Oh,l'm grounded? |
00:06:42 |
- For how long? |
00:06:45 |
Dad,come on. lt's humiliating. |
00:06:47 |
Tell me about it. |
00:06:48 |
Grounded for a month. |
00:06:50 |
A month! But that's worse than forever. |
00:06:53 |
OK,Dad,why? |
00:06:55 |
You lied to me. |
00:06:56 |
Yeah,well,you can't handle the truth. |
00:06:59 |
Try me next time. |
00:07:00 |
- But...but... |
00:07:03 |
OK,Dad. l...l love Marty. |
00:07:05 |
Oh,please. |
00:07:10 |
Come on. |
00:07:10 |
Dad,Dad. Dad,Dad,stop.OK,just |
00:07:13 |
l didn't know right |
00:07:15 |
What's a while? |
00:07:16 |
l've known him for three |
00:07:19 |
You can't know in three days. |
00:07:22 |
- Well,maybe she can. |
00:07:24 |
What you're feeling is not love. |
00:07:27 |
- lt is young and reckless. |
00:07:30 |
- You may think it's love,it is not! |
00:07:32 |
l love him. |
00:07:33 |
- No,it's not.No,it's not. |
00:08:07 |
Dad? You OK? |
00:08:10 |
There goes Jane's college education. |
00:08:13 |
There goes Cara's. |
00:08:15 |
Oh,no. What about mine? |
00:08:17 |
No,you're good. |
00:08:18 |
Ah,no,wait. There it goes. |
00:08:24 |
You can't keep me from Marty. |
00:08:28 |
Dad,let me remind you that guys are |
00:08:36 |
- But know that only Marty gets my heart. |
00:08:42 |
l know a really good driver. |
00:08:44 |
No. No. |
00:08:55 |
Here you go. |
00:08:58 |
l think your sisters |
00:09:01 |
- Duh. |
00:09:04 |
You're a good father,but |
00:09:10 |
Who told you to say that? |
00:09:12 |
No one. |
00:09:14 |
Was it Jane or Cara? You can tell me. |
00:09:16 |
- l made it up myself. |
00:09:18 |
Which one of your sisters |
00:09:21 |
l made it up myself. |
00:09:24 |
- l can make things up for myself. |
00:09:26 |
- l made it up myself.****** |
00:09:30 |
- l'm in the fourth grade. |
00:10:19 |
Oh,they're here. |
00:10:22 |
They're here. Come,girls. |
00:10:25 |
- Hey,Poppy. |
00:10:27 |
Hi,Lil. |
00:10:30 |
Hey,Dad. |
00:10:35 |
Well,now we're all here. How you doing? |
00:10:37 |
Uh,fine. Or maybe not. |
00:10:39 |
My kids can't stand me. |
00:10:40 |
Means you're doing something right. |
00:10:46 |
- Oh,you're so... |
00:10:49 |
Look at your girls. |
00:10:52 |
- No,no,no.They're still very young. |
00:10:54 |
Hey,how are you? |
00:10:56 |
- She's getting big. |
00:10:58 |
Hey,man. |
00:11:04 |
- Hello. |
00:11:05 |
Hey,Eileen,how are you? |
00:11:08 |
Did you hit traffic? |
00:11:09 |
Yeah,it wasn't... eh,not too bad. |
00:11:12 |
Hi,sis. |
00:11:13 |
- Glad you're here. |
00:11:15 |
l've never seen these guys in my life. |
00:11:16 |
- Hi,Uncle Dan. |
00:11:18 |
- Something. |
00:11:21 |
Way to go. |
00:11:22 |
- Sounds good. |
00:11:28 |
Honey,you're down here. |
00:11:30 |
Your brother,Mitch,has a |
00:11:33 |
- l'm in the special room. |
00:11:34 |
- Sorry,bro. |
00:11:44 |
- You sleep tight. |
00:12:14 |
- You tired? |
00:12:16 |
Morning. |
00:12:17 |
Good morning. |
00:12:18 |
- Sleep OK? |
00:12:21 |
Can l get you guys something? |
00:12:23 |
Get a life. |
00:12:32 |
She just needs some space. |
00:12:33 |
- That's not what she needs. |
00:12:36 |
From the sound of things,you all do. |
00:12:39 |
Yeah,why don't you go get the papers? |
00:12:41 |
Oh,Mom. |
00:12:42 |
Yeah,go on. |
00:12:44 |
lt would do you good. |
00:12:46 |
Get lost for a little while. |
00:12:48 |
- Maybe l should stick around. |
00:12:50 |
Get lost,Danny. |
00:12:51 |
lt's not a request. |
00:14:15 |
Good morning. |
00:14:16 |
l'll be with you in a minute. |
00:14:19 |
Well,then he went downtown. |
00:14:22 |
Yeah. For coffee.Right. |
00:14:25 |
Talks to him on weekends. |
00:14:30 |
Excuse me. Could you help? |
00:14:34 |
Yes. |
00:14:35 |
l'm looking for a book,obviously. |
00:14:39 |
Anything in particular? |
00:14:40 |
Yeah,something that can |
00:14:47 |
what might be an awkward situation. |
00:14:50 |
OK. Um,what... |
00:14:53 |
- what's kind of,um... |
00:14:57 |
But not necessarily big,''ha ha |
00:15:02 |
and certainly not make-fun-of-other-people |
00:15:07 |
- uh,human funny. |
00:15:12 |
And,uh,if it could,um,sneak |
00:15:17 |
and at the same time make you think that |
00:15:20 |
what you thought was not only |
00:15:24 |
but when you're wrong,there's a |
00:15:31 |
Well,maybe what l mean is,um, |
00:15:35 |
more importantly,l'm |
00:15:41 |
And at the same time,not. |
00:15:43 |
Meaning l wanna feel,uh, |
00:15:46 |
a deep connection to,uh,something. |
00:15:51 |
Or maybe l don't know |
00:15:53 |
Well,in my experience,you rarely |
00:15:57 |
Maybe that's why there're so many. |
00:16:00 |
So,what do we have? |
00:16:00 |
- We have a smattering,a sort of potpourri ... |
00:16:06 |
of possibilities. Yeah. |
00:16:07 |
Um,here we go. We have,uh,poetry. |
00:16:10 |
Dickinson,you know,basic stuff. |
00:16:12 |
- Little Neruda is always good. |
00:16:15 |
Oh,now,this is actually |
00:16:18 |
The Life of Gandhi? |
00:16:20 |
l... No,but he... |
00:16:21 |
Nobody has ever been |
00:16:26 |
Um,lighthouses. |
00:16:27 |
A Good Man Is Hard to Find. |
00:16:29 |
Uh,the title alone. |
00:16:31 |
Anna Karenina. l don't... |
00:16:33 |
Oh,now,that's funny. |
00:16:35 |
No,actually,no,funny is here. |
00:16:41 |
Maybe it's not that funny. |
00:16:43 |
No,actually that's funny. |
00:16:46 |
Good. OK,good. |
00:16:49 |
But,uh,if you could pick only one. |
00:16:54 |
Well,l would say |
00:16:57 |
that nothing rivals the |
00:17:04 |
l'm being honest. |
00:17:05 |
l just walked around |
00:17:08 |
- l just grabbed whatever l could grab. |
00:17:10 |
- Sold. |
00:17:12 |
l want them all. |
00:17:13 |
These were just suggestions,l... |
00:17:14 |
Make sure he gets the |
00:17:17 |
He doesn't work here. |
00:17:19 |
Well,he should. |
00:17:24 |
You are smooth. |
00:17:27 |
Uh,actually,no,l'm not smooth. |
00:17:31 |
l'm,uh,Dan. |
00:17:33 |
Sorry. |
00:17:36 |
Marie. |
00:17:43 |
Um,so,Marie,can l make it up to you? |
00:17:48 |
OK. Here is your tea. |
00:17:50 |
Hot. Watch it.And there |
00:17:54 |
And l bought a muffin,but l |
00:18:02 |
l should put that down. |
00:18:03 |
- Thank you. |
00:18:06 |
l'm a big believer in forks. |
00:18:09 |
And you are not,apparently. |
00:18:12 |
- So,Dan... |
00:18:13 |
You were born? |
00:18:15 |
l was born. Like everybody else. |
00:18:18 |
And l grew up,like everybody else. |
00:18:22 |
Good? |
00:18:26 |
Um,OK. What else? |
00:18:28 |
l went to school,and l |
00:18:31 |
This show,'60s,a TV show. |
00:18:35 |
When l was ten,l |
00:18:37 |
So l used to hold these magic shows |
00:18:40 |
l tried to make a |
00:18:43 |
And she didn't. |
00:18:45 |
And it involved a body |
00:18:50 |
the end of my... |
00:19:03 |
Let me tell you |
00:19:07 |
You're gonna laugh. |
00:19:09 |
Something l've never told anybody... |
00:19:12 |
in my life. |
00:19:14 |
Um,and this is really |
00:19:20 |
And then she got,uh,sick. |
00:19:24 |
And,um,then she was gone. |
00:19:29 |
And,uh... |
00:19:33 |
lt's taken a while. |
00:19:38 |
We should probably talk |
00:19:40 |
So you're telling me that you're one |
00:19:45 |
who preys on unsuspecting |
00:19:48 |
lt seems that would be me. |
00:19:49 |
- Been there. |
00:19:56 |
No,it seems that it's been... |
00:20:00 |
- seriously hard. |
00:20:04 |
No,we're OK now. We're really OK. |
00:20:09 |
You don't have to smile. |
00:20:13 |
Better than the alternative. |
00:20:19 |
Can you hold? |
00:20:23 |
Excuse me. |
00:20:25 |
No,no,l'm minutes away. |
00:20:27 |
Yes. |
00:20:29 |
- Um,l have to go. |
00:20:35 |
l just lost track of time. |
00:20:38 |
l wish we could keep talking. |
00:20:41 |
Well,it was nice,and a |
00:20:45 |
Maybe l can call you sometime? |
00:20:46 |
Uh,that might be awkward. |
00:20:49 |
'Cause you're in a relationship? |
00:20:50 |
Yes. A new one. |
00:20:52 |
- l would've found out if l hadn't been talking. |
00:20:55 |
But it's not exactly fair,is it? |
00:20:58 |
l mean,you know all about |
00:21:02 |
l don't wanna go through the rest of my life wondering |
00:21:08 |
All we'd be is two people |
00:21:14 |
OK. No harm in that. |
00:21:23 |
Oh,OK. |
00:21:26 |
Call. |
00:21:28 |
Or don't,but,uh,call. |
00:21:39 |
Just so you know,um,l would |
00:21:54 |
OK. |
00:22:00 |
''l'd even call to |
00:22:07 |
Sorry. Sorry! |
00:22:22 |
l,um... |
00:22:23 |
l never do this kind of thing,officer. |
00:22:25 |
l'm usually very careful. |
00:22:28 |
And nobody believes in... |
00:22:31 |
- Welcome to Rhode lsland. |
00:22:33 |
Yeah,it's nice to be here. |
00:22:43 |
What's wrong? |
00:22:44 |
Nobody. l mean,nothing. |
00:22:48 |
Danny's back. |
00:22:56 |
Dude,are you all right? |
00:22:57 |
What? Yeah.No,no,no,l'm good. |
00:23:00 |
Really? Yeah. |
00:23:02 |
'Cause you don't... you don't seem good. |
00:23:04 |
Well,it was the strangest thing. |
00:23:07 |
l,um... |
00:23:10 |
Wow |
00:23:11 |
Wow what? |
00:23:15 |
l met somebody,and |
00:23:18 |
- Hot |
00:23:22 |
- You got her number? |
00:23:23 |
You gonna call? |
00:23:24 |
lt's complicated. |
00:23:25 |
No,it's simple. You've gotta call. |
00:23:27 |
No,he just met her. |
00:23:29 |
He's probably worried it's too soon. |
00:23:30 |
No,it's never too soon. |
00:23:34 |
Amy,Dan met someone. |
00:23:35 |
- He met someone? |
00:23:37 |
Come here. How soon till he can call? |
00:23:39 |
l don't know. l haven't |
00:23:41 |
Me neither. |
00:23:42 |
- My God,who is she? |
00:23:44 |
- Dan met a hottie. |
00:23:49 |
You know what? Let's ask Annie. |
00:23:52 |
- Just now? |
00:23:53 |
What does she look like? |
00:23:55 |
She... |
00:23:56 |
What's the,um... |
00:24:01 |
The question? |
00:24:02 |
This is my brother,Dan. |
00:24:04 |
And,um,he needs your advice. |
00:24:05 |
He met some hottie downtown,and,um... |
00:24:09 |
- She's a little shell-shocked. |
00:24:11 |
Mitch neglects to mention that in their |
00:24:16 |
l didn't want to scare her off. |
00:24:17 |
Let's go,everybody! |
00:24:19 |
- Let's go. |
00:24:23 |
So,um,Annie? |
00:24:25 |
lt's Anne-Marie. |
00:24:27 |
Um,Mitch calls me Annie,but,uh,l'm |
00:24:30 |
l've two Marys and a Martha in my exercise |
00:24:33 |
No. That would be not good. |
00:24:37 |
l... l prefer Marie. |
00:24:39 |
Come on,sweetie. Women are on the porch. |
00:24:41 |
Girls out there,guys in here. |
00:24:43 |
Come on,Dan. Let's do it. |
00:24:48 |
Perfect! OK. |
00:24:50 |
The briefest time units. Four letters. |
00:24:52 |
- Mili. |
00:24:54 |
- Nano! |
00:24:58 |
Great! |
00:24:59 |
Hey,no spying. |
00:25:04 |
You guys are way behind! |
00:25:06 |
That's not helping. |
00:25:07 |
Uh,l don't think ''secretive'' fits. |
00:25:10 |
No,it doesn't fit. |
00:25:12 |
- Let's move on to 1 2 across. |
00:25:14 |
For you to be interested in someone,she |
00:25:18 |
Skip 1 2. |
00:25:19 |
This is what l'm trying to tell you. |
00:25:20 |
lt is not going to happen. |
00:25:21 |
She is already dating somebody. |
00:25:24 |
That's not your problem,bro. |
00:25:26 |
Actually,it kind of is. |
00:25:27 |
Listen up,1 5 across,five |
00:25:30 |
- Pan-fry. |
00:25:32 |
Uh,''grill.'' |
00:25:33 |
Dude,is there a rock on her left hand? |
00:25:35 |
Uh,no,not yet. |
00:25:36 |
Then all's fair. |
00:25:37 |
All right,now focus,people! Pan-fry! |
00:25:40 |
Saut¨¦. |
00:25:41 |
Oh,my gosh. Of course it's saut¨¦! |
00:25:45 |
And,uh,the word before,did |
00:25:50 |
lt would |
00:25:52 |
l think it would make ''ozone'' work. |
00:25:54 |
Lord,we hit the mother lode! |
00:26:02 |
Ten letters. |
00:26:02 |
''Anything that can |
00:26:06 |
Earth to Dan. We're still at across. |
00:26:07 |
We're not even at down,Dan. |
00:26:09 |
We're dying here,buddy. |
00:26:15 |
We're done. |
00:26:16 |
- Hooray for the dishes. |
00:26:22 |
- Let's check it! |
00:26:24 |
Dishes,duh! |
00:26:26 |
What happened? You |
00:26:29 |
Sorry,guys. |
00:26:30 |
Lay off him. He's got a lot on his mind. |
00:26:32 |
Saut¨¦. |
00:26:33 |
Dad,Mom. What do you think of... |
00:26:36 |
Well,Mitch,it's too soon to tell. |
00:26:38 |
That being said,she's |
00:26:44 |
we'll keep her and get rid of you. |
00:26:48 |
Dan,honey,you missed a spot. |
00:26:52 |
Seriously,dude. That girl |
00:26:57 |
What do you think of her? |
00:26:59 |
Um,she's great. |
00:27:28 |
- No,no!Let's go,Gus. |
00:27:30 |
Can l show you where |
00:27:32 |
- Oh,yes.Yes. |
00:27:37 |
Um,if l had known,l would have never... |
00:27:39 |
Not my brother's girlfriend. |
00:27:41 |
Uh,no,of course not. |
00:27:42 |
And,for the record,l |
00:27:46 |
Hey,we are... This is the bay. |
00:27:49 |
- And we're right there. |
00:27:51 |
So,what should we do? |
00:27:52 |
Um,it's kind of funny. |
00:27:54 |
- Maybe we should just tell everyone. |
00:27:58 |
We didn't do anything |
00:28:00 |
Good! |
00:28:01 |
- You guys are getting to know each other. |
00:28:03 |
Just showing her where |
00:28:05 |
- Hey,Uncle Mitch,you're not counting. |
00:28:10 |
l know what's goin' |
00:28:15 |
You're not hiding. Go ahead. |
00:28:19 |
One!Two! |
00:28:21 |
- Go! |
00:28:24 |
Three! |
00:28:26 |
Clay,l know you're in that back closet. |
00:28:28 |
Come on! |
00:28:29 |
- Four! |
00:28:31 |
Do over! |
00:28:32 |
Five! Six! |
00:28:35 |
- l'm counting to 200. |
00:28:36 |
- Yes,we do. |
00:28:40 |
Eight! |
00:28:43 |
- Mitch is a great guy. |
00:28:45 |
He's fun and,uh,funny. |
00:28:47 |
Uncomplicated in a... in a good way. |
00:28:50 |
- Just what l need. |
00:28:52 |
Nine! |
00:28:53 |
See,l just ended this |
00:28:57 |
and l joined this gym |
00:29:00 |
He's a great guy. |
00:29:02 |
You keep saying that. |
00:29:03 |
Well,because he is. |
00:29:05 |
Ten! |
00:29:07 |
Eleven,1 2,1 3,1 4,1 5! |
00:29:09 |
So good luck... to all of us. |
00:29:13 |
OK. |
00:29:18 |
So a little bird told me |
00:29:21 |
Lilly. |
00:29:22 |
They're looking at a |
00:29:24 |
lt's a long shot at best. |
00:29:25 |
She's amazing. |
00:29:27 |
Name a place,she's either |
00:29:29 |
Tibet,Chile,Berlin when |
00:29:36 |
Wait! |
00:29:38 |
Whoa,whoa,what'd l miss? |
00:29:39 |
- Well,Mitch certainly made out. |
00:29:43 |
And what about you? |
00:29:45 |
Dad,don't... |
00:29:46 |
Look,l know you always say that |
00:29:49 |
and that to try again would feel |
00:29:57 |
Can we just walk,please? |
00:30:09 |
l wanted to spare you. |
00:30:11 |
And l never smelt a thing! |
00:30:15 |
Somebody please pass the corn. |
00:30:17 |
And that's how we met. |
00:30:19 |
- l got it. |
00:30:21 |
What's your sign? |
00:30:22 |
Scorpio,Libra rising. |
00:30:24 |
- Oh,my God,so am l. |
00:30:25 |
- Do you have any siblings? |
00:30:27 |
Who wants corn? Any... |
00:30:29 |
Tell us something about yourself |
00:30:35 |
l am an,um... |
00:30:37 |
an accomplished maker of pancakes. |
00:30:41 |
Talent show. Talent show. |
00:30:43 |
What would your perfect day be? |
00:30:45 |
- Mine would start with Annie,and end with Annie... |
00:30:48 |
So you were saying? |
00:30:50 |
Uh,my perfect day would start with going to a |
00:30:55 |
new customs,someplace where l'm |
00:30:59 |
Welcome. l think you've arrived. |
00:31:03 |
l want to say,the first time... |
00:31:04 |
The first time that l saw her... |
00:31:07 |
Sweetheart,sweetheart,you |
00:31:10 |
Well,l thought that l just died |
00:31:17 |
Thank you. |
00:31:26 |
Are you and Mitch in love? |
00:31:28 |
This corn is like an angel. |
00:31:39 |
- Let's design a tent tonight. |
00:31:41 |
Big giant one! |
00:31:44 |
We can make it have ceilings! |
00:32:04 |
Dessert! Dessert. |
00:32:06 |
Oh,Danny,some of us are still eating. |
00:32:09 |
- lt's getting late. |
00:32:10 |
l'm an only child too. |
00:32:12 |
- This is really overwhelming,isn't it? |
00:32:15 |
When does a boyfriend become a lover? |
00:32:18 |
OK. OK,all right,all right. |
00:32:20 |
l think we can stop |
00:32:23 |
Been grilling her all night. |
00:32:24 |
Does it feel like we're grilling you? |
00:32:25 |
No. No,not at all. |
00:32:27 |
She's just being nice. |
00:32:28 |
No. l love the questions. |
00:32:31 |
Oh,please. |
00:32:34 |
On behalf of my family,l |
00:32:38 |
None of Mitch's girlfriends have ever been |
00:32:42 |
- Dan does have a point. |
00:32:45 |
- Not the body double. |
00:32:47 |
- What was her name? |
00:32:49 |
Oh,God! |
00:32:50 |
Or the ''massage therapist.'' |
00:32:54 |
None of the flight attendants from |
00:32:57 |
who've wheeled their |
00:32:59 |
- OK,that's enough. |
00:33:00 |
Am l wrong? Come on. |
00:33:07 |
Wow,Dan. |
00:33:09 |
Thank you for pointing that out. |
00:33:11 |
You're the smartest guy l know. |
00:33:15 |
He's right. |
00:33:16 |
lt's Annie's turn to ask me whatever... |
00:33:20 |
She prefers Marie. |
00:33:23 |
Ask me whatever you want,Marie. |
00:33:25 |
l don't have any questions. |
00:33:27 |
Oh,come on. |
00:33:30 |
Mitch said early on that if l'd forgive |
00:33:37 |
Well,that's a stupid thing to do. |
00:33:39 |
- OK,into the family room. |
00:33:41 |
Kids,come on. |
00:33:43 |
lnto the family room. |
00:33:50 |
John,bring the pies,please. |
00:33:59 |
Not you. |
00:34:00 |
You'll be doing the dishes alone. |
00:34:08 |
- Six. |
00:34:10 |
Yes,yes,yes! |
00:34:16 |
Good job. Good job. |
00:34:19 |
- Second word. |
00:34:22 |
You,you! |
00:34:26 |
l'm sorry. l was way,way out of line. |
00:34:28 |
No,you're never out of |
00:34:30 |
- You'll understand when l tell... |
00:34:34 |
- Can l just say one thing? |
00:34:37 |
When you were talking about my |
00:34:44 |
What l feel for Marie is different. |
00:34:50 |
You know that feeling |
00:34:54 |
- Heart. |
00:34:55 |
When your heart is just... |
00:34:57 |
- Pounding. |
00:34:59 |
- Like it's actually outside your ribs. |
00:35:03 |
- Exposed,vulnerable... |
00:35:05 |
lt's... Wonderful and awful and |
00:35:09 |
Yes. Yes.Yeah,what do |
00:35:14 |
Uh,love. |
00:35:20 |
You always did have the words. |
00:35:29 |
Stanford or Berkeley. |
00:35:31 |
- Oh,those are great schools. |
00:35:35 |
Or somewhere closer to home. |
00:35:41 |
Lil,you have trouble sleeping,you |
00:35:44 |
Dad. |
00:35:48 |
Uncle Mitch,are you going |
00:35:51 |
You bet. |
00:35:52 |
Mom and Dad's old ''separate |
00:35:54 |
Kinda high school. |
00:35:56 |
l agree with that rule. |
00:35:57 |
- Thank you. |
00:35:59 |
Mitch,what're you doing? |
00:36:00 |
Marie brought some books,but l thought she |
00:36:04 |
Oh,no,no,no. Not a good idea. |
00:36:06 |
- Au contraire. |
00:36:07 |
Best book l've read. |
00:36:08 |
- May be the only book you've ever read. |
00:36:11 |
Be nice. |
00:36:12 |
lf you can sign it,that'd be great. |
00:36:13 |
That's first edition. |
00:36:15 |
lt's the only edition,Mom. |
00:36:16 |
- Oh,now.Good night. |
00:36:19 |
Sleep tight. |
00:36:22 |
Um,l really wish you wouldn't. |
00:36:26 |
''Good luck''? That's it? |
00:36:29 |
OK,we can work with that. |
00:36:41 |
Good night. |
00:36:57 |
Good morning. |
00:36:59 |
- Say,''Good morning.'' |
00:37:02 |
Yeah. Good. |
00:37:05 |
Have fun. |
00:37:07 |
Here you go,sweetheart. There you go. |
00:37:10 |
Marie. |
00:37:11 |
Will you join us,please,beautiful girl? |
00:37:14 |
- Hey,Mom. |
00:37:15 |
- Mom,will you hit that music? |
00:37:18 |
You need this more than |
00:37:20 |
I got him |
00:37:21 |
All right,Dan. Get on over here. |
00:37:23 |
Here we go,boxer shuffle. |
00:37:26 |
And l wanna see those fists up. |
00:37:29 |
Three,two,one. To the right! |
00:37:32 |
Get a good bounce. |
00:37:40 |
Four,five,six,seven. Counting! |
00:37:42 |
One,two,three,four,five,six,seven. |
00:37:46 |
- You wanna take it,babe? |
00:37:48 |
- Yeah.Yeah,yeah. |
00:37:51 |
Salsa? |
00:37:55 |
The floor is yours,baby. |
00:37:58 |
And left,and one... |
00:37:59 |
OK,hold on,hold on,all right. Dan. |
00:38:01 |
Dan gets to go up front. Beginners |
00:38:05 |
- *** |
00:38:07 |
One,two,three,four. |
00:38:16 |
- Let's do the arm a little bit. |
00:38:20 |
One,two,three,four. |
00:38:37 |
OK,everybody. Look,Marie,what to do. |
00:38:39 |
Dan,what not to do. |
00:38:41 |
The other way. |
00:38:42 |
You were excellent. |
00:38:43 |
Thank you so much. |
00:38:44 |
- Oh,you're welcome. |
00:38:49 |
You always hate to start it,but |
00:39:01 |
That's a good stretch. |
00:39:06 |
Hey,maybe you'll try that |
00:39:13 |
lt's good. |
00:39:28 |
Dad? |
00:39:29 |
Lilly,get your sisters |
00:39:39 |
Where are you going? |
00:39:40 |
- Can we come with you? |
00:39:43 |
My girls are looking for a little |
00:39:48 |
But l promise we'll do |
00:39:50 |
Lil,come on. Let's go.ln the car. |
00:39:53 |
Girls,let's go. |
00:39:55 |
Dad,what is it? |
00:39:56 |
Nana's gonna teach me how to knit. |
00:39:59 |
Cara,let's go. |
00:40:00 |
No. |
00:40:05 |
OK. What are you waiting for? |
00:40:07 |
Come here. |
00:40:10 |
Right here. Right here! |
00:40:12 |
Oh,you're so heavy. |
00:40:14 |
l don't know what l'm |
00:40:18 |
l'm gonna fall down. l |
00:40:34 |
No,no,no. |
00:40:37 |
This used to be the place with all |
00:40:43 |
Remember you loved the saltwater taffy? |
00:40:45 |
- When l was four. |
00:40:49 |
Stick with me,guys. Oh,l |
00:40:54 |
Sounds good. |
00:40:56 |
Life is full of disappointment. |
00:40:59 |
Big and sometimes even bigger. |
00:41:02 |
So,what's it gonna be? |
00:41:03 |
The lighthouse or the |
00:41:10 |
Do you know why we have lighthouses? |
00:41:11 |
Because they're neat? |
00:41:14 |
That's right. Yes. |
00:41:16 |
And also because they |
00:41:20 |
They,uh,help keep boats safe and |
00:41:26 |
Because when you're out there and you're being |
00:41:32 |
and you think that you'll |
00:41:37 |
and that you could just |
00:41:40 |
and sink down all the way down... |
00:41:43 |
deep,it's the light |
00:41:50 |
lt's the light... |
00:41:51 |
Dad,are you OK? |
00:41:54 |
'Course l'm OK... honey. |
00:42:05 |
Did you guys have fun? |
00:42:06 |
- No. |
00:42:10 |
Jump inside. Let's go,honey. |
00:42:12 |
Kids? Where've you been? |
00:42:13 |
l know. l know.l'm... |
00:42:15 |
Oh,we looked all over. For |
00:42:18 |
l'm sorry. l wasn't thinking. |
00:42:20 |
Hi,buddy. |
00:42:23 |
l'm sorry. |
00:42:25 |
Come on,buddy. |
00:42:29 |
l got it. |
00:42:32 |
Dan. She was amazing. |
00:42:34 |
You should've seen her. She |
00:42:37 |
l was fast. Wasn't l? |
00:42:39 |
Yeah,it was like l couldn't catch up. |
00:42:41 |
Even your sweat is beautiful. |
00:42:46 |
Where'd Dan go? |
00:42:48 |
- Mom,she moves like a goddess out there. |
00:42:52 |
She's like a panther. |
00:42:56 |
She's competitive,but l just wanted |
00:42:59 |
- l wanted to ride her up the beach.She was... |
00:43:02 |
She was like my stallion. |
00:43:09 |
l wanted her to be in front |
00:43:11 |
Marie. |
00:43:12 |
There's fresh towels up there |
00:43:17 |
l miss your skin. |
00:43:21 |
l miss your smell. |
00:43:24 |
l miss... l miss your eyes. |
00:43:29 |
Dad! |
00:43:31 |
l... |
00:43:32 |
- You're such a freak! |
00:43:34 |
No,sorry. That was just |
00:43:36 |
Yeah,he was totally spying. |
00:43:46 |
- Hello?Hello? |
00:43:51 |
- Can it wait? |
00:43:53 |
l mean,really working. Be honest. |
00:43:56 |
l'm having a nice time. |
00:43:57 |
A nice time? |
00:43:58 |
- Yes,l am. |
00:44:01 |
- Except for the soap in my eyes. |
00:44:03 |
'Cause you know what? l'm not. |
00:44:04 |
l'm not enjoying myself,and l think |
00:44:09 |
we should have ground rules.Don't you? |
00:44:10 |
Oh,yeah,sure. OK,sure. |
00:44:15 |
OK! All right,that's...That's |
00:44:18 |
No,no,no. We need to keep our distance. |
00:44:20 |
Stop. Stay away. |
00:44:21 |
- Towel. |
00:44:23 |
OK. l'm sorry. |
00:44:24 |
Thank you. |
00:44:26 |
And,you know,stop reading |
00:44:29 |
Why? |
00:44:29 |
And that salsa thing you do... |
00:44:33 |
- What are you talking about? |
00:44:35 |
This... This thing. |
00:44:36 |
lf you could just not do that. |
00:44:40 |
- l'm sorry. |
00:44:43 |
There are other things you |
00:44:46 |
Thank you. That... |
00:44:47 |
not... Yeah!l said it.l said it. |
00:44:49 |
l didn't mean it,but l said it. |
00:44:51 |
- And you know what else l'm gonna do? |
00:44:53 |
l am going to make |
00:44:57 |
so as to not encourage |
00:45:01 |
OK,that's hilarious. But you know what? |
00:45:03 |
l... No. |
00:45:04 |
l'm gonna stop thinking about you. |
00:45:07 |
- Good. |
00:45:09 |
And if l start thinking about |
00:45:14 |
- Weakness. |
00:45:16 |
l'm going to focus all of |
00:45:19 |
- My flaws. |
00:45:21 |
And they are? |
00:45:22 |
l have no idea,but you can rest |
00:45:26 |
Just ask Nana. |
00:45:27 |
l'm so sorry. Are you taking a shower? |
00:45:29 |
Yes. l'm taking a shower. |
00:45:31 |
Oh,well,a little advice. |
00:45:34 |
Thank you.Takes forever |
00:45:38 |
Um,can l talk to you about something? |
00:45:39 |
Sure. Absolutely. |
00:45:40 |
And can we just keep it between us? |
00:45:44 |
lt's just... lt was... |
00:45:48 |
See,last night what l was... You were |
00:45:52 |
The importance of travel and |
00:45:57 |
and l just started |
00:46:02 |
All of that,you know,how much... |
00:46:08 |
Right. |
00:46:11 |
But just... Oh,you're...You're |
00:46:14 |
Oh,l forgot. |
00:46:17 |
l'll look away. l'll look over here. |
00:46:19 |
Anyway,so,l just |
00:46:26 |
You know,l've been thinking a |
00:46:30 |
you know,in the future,like |
00:46:33 |
lt's just hard to figure out |
00:46:36 |
l mean,l know l wanna go somewhere |
00:46:41 |
l mean it's just hard to figure out,you |
00:46:46 |
Right. |
00:46:47 |
And just to have that |
00:46:50 |
Which is,you know,what |
00:46:55 |
Right. |
00:46:56 |
But it's also,l mean,it's also... |
00:46:58 |
l mean,it's also terrifying realizing |
00:47:04 |
You know what l mean? |
00:47:05 |
You know,l think it's |
00:47:10 |
lnteresting the way that,um, |
00:47:12 |
you end up somewhere |
00:47:36 |
Lunch! |
00:47:42 |
Mac and cheese. Nothing better. |
00:47:44 |
Adults are in the dining room. |
00:47:46 |
You know,l think l'm going to |
00:47:51 |
Dan. Honey... |
00:47:53 |
Mom,please. Just let me be. |
00:48:04 |
- Hey,guys. |
00:48:06 |
Hi,Uncle Dan. |
00:48:33 |
Hello? |
00:48:49 |
What's going on? |
00:48:50 |
Marie's helping me with something. |
00:48:52 |
We're having no fun at all. |
00:48:54 |
Yeah,l can see that. |
00:48:56 |
How's she doing? |
00:48:57 |
She's amazing. |
00:48:59 |
Bye,Dad. |
00:49:00 |
Bye. |
00:00:04 |
So you were saying... |
00:00:05 |
Oh,yeah. |
00:00:07 |
And l was trying to, |
00:00:08 |
um,make,like,you know... |
00:00:10 |
l was trying to make like a really heart. |
00:00:11 |
But,you know,l didn't even know |
00:00:14 |
So l cut it. |
00:00:15 |
And it came out,like,it was so... |
00:00:18 |
it came out like a... |
00:00:20 |
like a star. |
00:00:23 |
- Yeah.- Dan? |
00:00:25 |
Honey,you know we're worried about you. |
00:00:29 |
You know that. |
00:00:30 |
And with your behavior |
00:00:34 |
we are now officially worried. |
00:00:37 |
Well,thanks,l'm touched. |
00:00:39 |
But l'm fine. |
00:00:41 |
You don't... |
00:00:42 |
We're having a private conversation. |
00:00:43 |
Come on in. |
00:00:44 |
No,come on in. |
00:00:46 |
This is good. |
00:00:47 |
Mom,go ahead,l'm all ears. |
00:00:50 |
Look,you know,you do |
00:00:55 |
And you do so much for all of us. |
00:00:57 |
What are you doing for yourself? |
00:00:59 |
Not now. |
00:01:00 |
Come on in. |
00:01:02 |
Think about...We're trying to have a talk. |
00:01:04 |
lt's fine. |
00:01:05 |
We'd like to speak to you privately. |
00:01:07 |
Yes,honey. |
00:01:08 |
ls it 'cause Uncle Dan's acting weird? |
00:01:10 |
Yes,it is. |
00:01:10 |
There's an explanation for it. |
00:01:13 |
Please tell us. |
00:01:14 |
l just wanted to talk to you. |
00:01:16 |
Dude,you got to be way backed up. |
00:01:18 |
So l just hope from time to time |
00:01:20 |
you are treating yourself |
00:01:22 |
Oh,come on. |
00:01:23 |
l talked to my urologist about this. |
00:01:25 |
- That's enough. |
00:01:27 |
What are you talking about,man? |
00:01:29 |
The real question,the one no one will ask, |
00:01:32 |
is will Dan ever find love again? |
00:01:34 |
No,he won't. |
00:01:35 |
Howard. |
00:01:36 |
l'm sorry,he won't. |
00:01:38 |
l'm saying,one of the things, |
00:01:40 |
if you're open to it, |
00:01:43 |
l suppose. |
00:01:44 |
Hey,people. |
00:01:44 |
And...perfect. |
00:01:48 |
l don't think l was being clear before |
00:01:49 |
but you got to unclog that drain. |
00:01:51 |
You gotta unplug that bottle. |
00:01:54 |
lf l mixed a metaphor there. |
00:01:55 |
Yes,you did. |
00:01:56 |
So far what you've missed is,uh, |
00:01:58 |
''worried,'' ''love will |
00:02:02 |
Well,thanks. |
00:02:04 |
That is it. |
00:02:07 |
- We are done.You can all... |
00:02:09 |
- Oh,come on,Ma. |
00:02:10 |
We met Margot Draper's daughter |
00:02:14 |
Who? |
00:02:14 |
And she asked all about you. |
00:02:16 |
You see,Danny,you gotta, |
00:02:17 |
you know,have a little fun. |
00:02:19 |
Which means that Ruthie Draper |
00:02:23 |
and you're gonna have drinks! |
00:02:25 |
l don't even remember Ruthie... |
00:02:27 |
- You're gonna go on a date! |
00:02:28 |
No,l'm not going on a date,Mom. |
00:02:30 |
Yes,honey,it's time. |
00:02:33 |
Ruthie ''Pigface'' Draper. |
00:02:35 |
Mom,Dad,what,are you kidding? |
00:02:37 |
Not ''Pigface'' Draper. |
00:02:39 |
l'm sorry,that is downright cruel. |
00:02:41 |
There's nothing cruel about it. |
00:02:42 |
Mom,l don't even remember |
00:02:46 |
l don't wanna go! |
00:02:47 |
l don't want to go with the pig face. |
00:02:50 |
He's going. |
00:02:52 |
- lt's been decided! |
00:02:53 |
l don't remember ''Pigface'' Draper. |
00:02:55 |
This is a blind date. |
00:02:57 |
We'll double.Ok? |
00:02:58 |
lt'll be fun,it'll be fun.Right,Marie? |
00:03:01 |
Yes,it'll be fun. |
00:03:03 |
Yes. |
00:03:06 |
That's my girl. |
00:03:10 |
Come on,it'll be swine... |
00:03:11 |
fine. |
00:03:13 |
- l'm sorry.l'm sorry. |
00:03:39 |
All right.All right. |
00:04:28 |
All right.All right. |
00:04:31 |
Here we go. |
00:04:57 |
That's very good. |
00:05:02 |
lt's really...it's beauti... |
00:05:04 |
Hello! |
00:05:06 |
Everybody,this is Ruthie Draper. |
00:05:08 |
- You know everybody. |
00:05:10 |
- They're bigger. |
00:05:12 |
Nice to see you again,Ruthie. |
00:05:13 |
Hello,Dan. |
00:05:16 |
l'd know you anywhere. |
00:05:17 |
l mean,you look just the same. |
00:05:20 |
Ruthie,um,you look great. |
00:05:27 |
- Funny. |
00:05:29 |
So,Harvard Medical,Johns Hopkins... |
00:05:32 |
You're doing well for yourself,Ruthie. |
00:05:34 |
Yeah,that's impressive. |
00:05:36 |
lt must not,uh,leave enough time though for... |
00:05:38 |
for dating? |
00:05:39 |
Uh,there was someone. |
00:05:42 |
He was very special in my life,but,uh... |
00:05:48 |
He was lost in a freak accident. |
00:05:51 |
l'm so sorry. |
00:05:55 |
Thank you. |
00:05:57 |
What's weird is that we'd only |
00:06:02 |
but it's... |
00:06:03 |
you know how sometimes you just know. |
00:06:06 |
- Yeah. |
00:06:07 |
Yes,absolutely,yes. |
00:06:09 |
Um,yeah. |
00:06:10 |
So you're a doctor? |
00:06:11 |
Yes,yes. |
00:06:12 |
What's your,uh,specialty? |
00:06:16 |
Um,l'm a plastic surgeon. |
00:06:18 |
Oh,of course you are. |
00:06:19 |
No,l know,l know,l know |
00:06:23 |
But l work exclusively with burn victims, |
00:06:25 |
with children born |
00:06:28 |
She is basically a saint. |
00:06:30 |
No.No,l'm just. |
00:06:32 |
l'm just doing my little |
00:06:35 |
Just like your brother. |
00:06:37 |
Oh,stop.l'm... |
00:06:39 |
When l can't sleep at night, |
00:06:41 |
l go online and l read your past columns. |
00:06:44 |
Have you read Dan? |
00:06:46 |
Only his fiction. |
00:06:48 |
You're in for such a treat,really. |
00:06:51 |
l mean,what... |
00:06:53 |
what you said,the mother of Couch Potato? |
00:06:57 |
''Hide the remote. |
00:06:58 |
So,what if he has to get up |
00:07:00 |
At least it's exercise.'' |
00:07:02 |
lt's brilliant. |
00:07:03 |
and the parents of the five picky eaters? |
00:07:05 |
They had to make individual |
00:07:09 |
''What are you,a restaurant?'' |
00:07:11 |
Right.Brilliant. |
00:07:12 |
She used your every word. |
00:07:13 |
All l'm saying,all l'm saying |
00:07:18 |
And l don't,l don't have problems, |
00:07:20 |
but it's clear that |
00:07:24 |
your words will bring me comfort. |
00:07:37 |
l'm sorry. |
00:07:38 |
l'm just gonna have to excuse myself. |
00:07:40 |
l can't help it. |
00:07:54 |
l'm sorry. |
00:07:55 |
But a girl that moves |
00:07:58 |
- a guy has got to wonder. |
00:08:01 |
She's cool. |
00:08:02 |
- Marie,you're cool,right? |
00:08:04 |
l'm cool. |
00:08:06 |
But l don't think Dan |
00:08:09 |
He's not?l'm not? |
00:08:12 |
l don't think you are. |
00:08:14 |
Are you? |
00:08:25 |
Oh,nice. |
00:08:28 |
All right.Yeah! |
00:08:32 |
l don't know what it was, |
00:08:32 |
but something was holding him back. |
00:08:35 |
Not anymore. |
00:08:37 |
Well,that's a beautiful thing. |
00:09:02 |
We're coming. |
00:09:53 |
All right.Ok. |
00:09:55 |
Home again,home again. |
00:09:57 |
- l really love your car. |
00:09:59 |
- Bye.- Bye. |
00:10:01 |
Nice meeting you,um,Ruth. |
00:10:03 |
- Yeah,you too. |
00:10:05 |
Actually,um,Dan and l are |
00:10:08 |
Don't wait up. |
00:10:26 |
Mmm,this is fantastic. |
00:10:28 |
l know what the secret ingredient is... |
00:10:30 |
love. |
00:10:33 |
Better and better with every bite. |
00:10:35 |
Words cannot describe. |
00:10:36 |
Mmm,thank you. |
00:10:37 |
Well,how are they? |
00:10:38 |
Dad,they're scrumptious. |
00:10:41 |
Truly mouthwatering. |
00:10:43 |
- Almost on my third stack. |
00:10:45 |
And nothing's stopping you,right? |
00:10:46 |
Nope. |
00:10:48 |
lt's a secret recipe, |
00:10:51 |
Yeah? |
00:10:53 |
So,uh,how's Captain Lucky |
00:10:56 |
- Uh,it was fun.- Yeah? |
00:10:58 |
Heard you worked up quite |
00:11:00 |
Yeah. |
00:11:02 |
Could l have one more there? |
00:11:03 |
There you go. |
00:11:04 |
You know what? |
00:11:04 |
Actually,l am a little hungry. |
00:11:07 |
Secret recipe.Right here. |
00:11:09 |
Boy,these are good.l love them. |
00:11:11 |
Thank you. |
00:11:13 |
How many have you had,Dad? |
00:11:14 |
So did you uncork? |
00:11:18 |
Whatever did or did not happen, |
00:11:20 |
no one deserves someone more than you. |
00:11:22 |
There you go. |
00:11:25 |
Coin toss.Outside. |
00:11:32 |
Yummy. |
00:11:58 |
All right.Nice!Yeah? |
00:12:01 |
That what you're gonna do? |
00:12:04 |
ls that how we're gonna play it? |
00:12:05 |
Yeah!OK.All right. |
00:12:35 |
Hey,pork chop! |
00:12:40 |
Marie! |
00:12:41 |
Marie! |
00:12:59 |
Danny! |
00:13:02 |
Why you persist in acting like |
00:13:06 |
l'm filled with reckless desire. |
00:13:08 |
You ought to be filled |
00:13:10 |
What does that mean? |
00:13:11 |
l think you know what that means. |
00:13:18 |
Dad,could you? |
00:13:19 |
- Oh,yeah.- Thanks. |
00:13:22 |
Hello? |
00:13:24 |
No,l'm his dad. |
00:13:27 |
Someone named Jordy for you. |
00:13:33 |
Everybody!Everybody! |
00:13:35 |
Dan just got a phone call. |
00:13:38 |
And you know,syndication is |
00:13:41 |
OK,all right.Let me explain. |
00:13:43 |
Um,l've been asked to meet with the head |
00:13:51 |
They're driving down tomorrow and |
00:13:57 |
That's great! |
00:14:01 |
Maybe you should get the job first. |
00:14:03 |
Yes,that's true. |
00:14:20 |
Dad?Dad? |
00:14:23 |
Lilly just asked me why you |
00:14:29 |
l wasn't flirting. |
00:14:30 |
Don't worry,l covered for you. |
00:14:32 |
l told her it was nothing. |
00:14:34 |
Because it was. |
00:14:36 |
Dad,l'm 1 7.OK? |
00:14:40 |
You were so flirting. |
00:14:42 |
You know,it doesn't matter anyway. |
00:14:43 |
lt's not like she's the |
00:14:47 |
But cool it,OK? |
00:14:55 |
And,um,congratulations. |
00:14:57 |
Thanks. |
00:15:42 |
Look,he took a bus here. |
00:15:43 |
He has relatives in Boston. |
00:15:45 |
Dad... |
00:15:47 |
Dad,he loves me! |
00:15:51 |
OK. |
00:15:52 |
You don't have to worry. |
00:15:54 |
When it comes to sex, |
00:15:56 |
Marty is the one who wants to wait. |
00:15:59 |
What about that sentence is |
00:16:02 |
Dad,l love him. |
00:16:04 |
Honey... |
00:16:04 |
l love him.l love him.l love him. |
00:16:08 |
No,you don't. |
00:16:10 |
What we have is true love. |
00:16:12 |
And just because you don't have it, |
00:16:14 |
doesn't mean you have to punish us. |
00:16:17 |
lnfatuation is not love. |
00:16:19 |
Sexual attraction is not love. |
00:16:22 |
You don't understand. |
00:16:23 |
Uh,l don't understand. |
00:16:25 |
No,you don't even understand |
00:16:28 |
What don't l understand,Cara? |
00:16:29 |
Please,help me out. |
00:16:31 |
What is it? |
00:16:32 |
lt's frustrating that you |
00:16:34 |
That... |
00:16:35 |
that there's something keeping you apart, |
00:16:37 |
something about this |
00:16:39 |
And whenever you're near this person, |
00:16:42 |
you don't know what to say, |
00:16:43 |
and you say everything that's |
00:16:46 |
And you know that if |
00:16:48 |
that this person will help you |
00:16:50 |
become the best possible |
00:16:53 |
So Marty can stay? |
00:17:01 |
l'm sorry. |
00:17:06 |
l'm sorry. |
00:17:14 |
''Marty can stay?'' |
00:17:18 |
Howard is going to drive you to the bus. |
00:17:19 |
We called your aunt, |
00:17:21 |
Yes,sir. |
00:17:22 |
Look,l'm not your parent, |
00:17:24 |
but l think you should know, |
00:17:25 |
love is a dangerous feeling. |
00:17:26 |
No,sir. |
00:17:28 |
- Are you arguing with me? |
00:17:31 |
lt's just... |
00:17:36 |
Love is not a feeling, |
00:17:40 |
Who told you that? |
00:17:41 |
Made it up,Mr. Burns. |
00:17:49 |
Come say goodbye. |
00:17:55 |
Window. |
00:17:56 |
- OK,that's it.- Dad. |
00:17:57 |
She'll see him again soon enough. |
00:18:02 |
No!No!No! |
00:18:07 |
Marty!Marty!Marty! |
00:18:12 |
That's sweet. |
00:18:14 |
What's sweet? |
00:18:14 |
How... |
00:18:15 |
How is that sweet? |
00:18:19 |
To be that certain. |
00:18:21 |
To feel so much love. |
00:18:24 |
Love isn't a feeling. |
00:18:26 |
No? |
00:18:30 |
lt's an ability. |
00:18:35 |
Well,if that's true, |
00:18:37 |
you have one gifted daughter. |
00:18:42 |
You are a murderer of love! |
00:18:53 |
OK,Cara.Next? |
00:18:55 |
Uh,Olivia has something with the girls. |
00:18:58 |
Gus will be doing his usual. |
00:19:00 |
Bella is on the fence. |
00:19:03 |
Oh,that's nice. |
00:19:04 |
Aunt Eileen? |
00:19:05 |
Put me down. |
00:19:06 |
Oh,really?What's your talent? |
00:19:07 |
Murderer of love. |
00:19:11 |
You were saying? |
00:19:12 |
We have something planned |
00:19:15 |
Put us all down. |
00:19:30 |
What's your Dad's talent? |
00:19:32 |
Doesn't have one. |
00:19:34 |
He's the only one |
00:19:38 |
l give you Bella Wilson. |
00:19:39 |
All right,Bella! |
00:19:42 |
Chihuahua. |
00:19:47 |
Go,Bella. |
00:19:48 |
You OK? |
00:19:50 |
Do what you always do. |
00:19:52 |
Marie is not a lip-sync kinda girl. |
00:19:55 |
- l gotta do something special. |
00:19:59 |
Bulldog. |
00:20:19 |
This is for Marty. |
00:21:12 |
l got an idea. |
00:21:14 |
l'm sure it'll be great. |
00:21:16 |
lt could be. |
00:21:23 |
OK,last but not least,Uncle Mitch. |
00:21:26 |
Uh,someone very wise,uh,my brother, |
00:21:30 |
once told me that if you want |
00:21:38 |
Um,by the way,l'd like |
00:21:42 |
l don't believe it. |
00:21:44 |
He hasn't played since she... |
00:21:45 |
One,two,three,four. |
00:24:11 |
What he said. |
00:24:22 |
Great job,guys. |
00:24:33 |
What was that? |
00:24:35 |
l couldn't... |
00:24:37 |
l couldn't stop myself. |
00:24:38 |
What am l supposed to do now? |
00:24:42 |
You can't do anything. |
00:24:43 |
He's my brother. |
00:24:44 |
Why did you sing for me... |
00:24:46 |
then? |
00:24:48 |
Because l... |
00:24:51 |
l'm... |
00:24:56 |
Page 92. |
00:24:57 |
''Did l just die? |
00:24:58 |
Because an angel walked into the room.'' |
00:25:00 |
Page 1 48. |
00:25:02 |
Uh,''l'll forgive you your |
00:25:06 |
lt seems all his best lines were yours. |
00:25:12 |
lt's unbearable. |
00:25:14 |
l... |
00:25:16 |
l can't keep pretending. |
00:25:35 |
Dad? |
00:25:37 |
Yeah,peanut. |
00:25:38 |
Will you come up to my room? |
00:25:39 |
l wanna show you something l made. |
00:25:41 |
Um,we'll do it tomorrow. |
00:25:43 |
OK,sweetie?l promise. |
00:25:48 |
OK,Dad. |
00:25:55 |
Oh,God! |
00:26:03 |
Hey,what's going on? |
00:26:09 |
What is complicated being here? |
00:26:11 |
My singing. |
00:26:12 |
l shouldn't have sang. |
00:26:13 |
l know this. |
00:26:16 |
No.lt was a bad song. |
00:26:17 |
ls she crying or laughing? |
00:26:24 |
- Oh,no,no,no. |
00:26:26 |
Please don't do it. |
00:26:28 |
Marie... |
00:26:42 |
Here he comes. |
00:26:44 |
Mom! |
00:26:46 |
Uh,no,no,no,no. |
00:26:47 |
l don't know what to say to him. |
00:26:48 |
l never lost a girl. |
00:26:50 |
Oh,good.This is a first. |
00:26:52 |
OK. |
00:26:54 |
Oh,uh,oh,yeah,l'll |
00:27:01 |
Please stop trying to act normal. |
00:27:11 |
Said l was a great guy. |
00:27:14 |
She said she loved me a lot. |
00:27:18 |
And then she said... |
00:27:21 |
we should both go find |
00:27:24 |
l'm so confused. |
00:27:25 |
l don't really know |
00:27:25 |
what happened from yesterday |
00:27:30 |
There has to be something. |
00:27:31 |
You know,some reason she... |
00:27:34 |
Why are you looking at me? |
00:27:35 |
Not looking at you. |
00:27:36 |
He's looking into the vast |
00:27:39 |
You just happen to be there. |
00:27:42 |
Danny,do you have anything to add? |
00:27:43 |
Yeah,what does the |
00:27:45 |
Come on. |
00:27:47 |
Honey,the hard truth |
00:27:52 |
Yeah,we really did. |
00:27:57 |
This isn't helping. |
00:27:58 |
No. |
00:28:00 |
Could somebody think |
00:28:03 |
OK,OK,um...OK,OK. |
00:28:06 |
Part of the Rat Pack!Singer. |
00:28:08 |
Dean Martin!Sammy Davis,Jr. |
00:28:14 |
Yes! |
00:28:16 |
Your turn,buddy.Come on.Let's do it. |
00:28:21 |
OK. |
00:28:22 |
Go! |
00:28:24 |
This is a,uh,gift... |
00:28:26 |
Hi,Jordy. |
00:28:27 |
- You can't talk.- No,but go on. |
00:28:29 |
- I had to leave.- I know. |
00:28:32 |
Ben Franklin! |
00:28:33 |
But the truth is,um... |
00:28:35 |
Yes? |
00:28:36 |
I didn't get very far. |
00:28:38 |
Beautiful smile,lovely eyes, |
00:28:40 |
one-of-a-kind woman. |
00:28:41 |
Marie! |
00:28:42 |
Yes. |
00:28:44 |
Oh,honey,don't,don't,don't... |
00:28:53 |
Dad? |
00:28:54 |
Hey,you. |
00:28:56 |
Can l show you what l made? |
00:28:58 |
First thing when l get back,OK? |
00:29:01 |
OK. |
00:29:16 |
You again. |
00:29:17 |
Nice to see you,officer. |
00:29:18 |
How are you today? |
00:29:20 |
You know why l pulled you over? |
00:29:21 |
l sure do. |
00:29:22 |
l know what l was doing |
00:29:24 |
and l know it's all wrong. |
00:29:26 |
This is gonna cost you. |
00:29:28 |
Put it on my tab. |
00:29:30 |
What was that? |
00:29:31 |
Put it on my tab. |
00:30:04 |
What are we doing? |
00:30:07 |
lt may be wrong. |
00:30:08 |
Yes. |
00:30:09 |
But there's a certain rightness |
00:30:13 |
l think,um,we've got to think. |
00:30:15 |
l mean,your girls,and how do we... |
00:30:17 |
They're extraordinary and... |
00:30:23 |
What? |
00:30:26 |
l think this is all premature. |
00:30:33 |
You do? |
00:30:38 |
We don't even know if you can bowl. |
00:30:58 |
All right. |
00:30:59 |
No,don't! |
00:31:00 |
- Wait.Wait. |
00:31:02 |
- You have to line up. |
00:31:03 |
Line up. |
00:31:04 |
- Come on. |
00:31:05 |
- All right. |
00:31:07 |
l'm not... |
00:31:10 |
Ready? |
00:31:15 |
Thank you. |
00:31:18 |
l liked that. |
00:31:19 |
That was a terrible shot, |
00:31:20 |
but l loved this at the end. |
00:31:23 |
Oh,l wouldn't go yet. |
00:31:29 |
Not bad.That's good. |
00:31:38 |
You're gonna break your arm like that. |
00:31:44 |
No,no.Don't do it. |
00:31:52 |
Oh,come on,come on,come on! |
00:31:56 |
Let's go at the same time. |
00:31:57 |
One,two,three. |
00:32:25 |
Dad? |
00:32:27 |
Oh,my God. |
00:32:28 |
Dad,what are you doing? |
00:32:30 |
What the hell? |
00:32:31 |
Marie? |
00:32:32 |
Hey. |
00:32:33 |
What the hell's going on? |
00:32:34 |
We'll go. |
00:32:37 |
- They were just kissing. |
00:32:40 |
You two broke up,right? |
00:32:42 |
Two hours ago. |
00:32:42 |
We broke up two hours ago. |
00:32:44 |
l know,l know,l know. |
00:32:46 |
l thought that you left. |
00:32:48 |
She did. |
00:32:48 |
She left,but she just didn't get very far. |
00:32:51 |
What? |
00:32:52 |
l can explain this. |
00:32:53 |
Yeah,let him explain. |
00:32:55 |
OK. |
00:32:56 |
Remember the woman at the bookstore? |
00:33:00 |
Here she is. |
00:33:03 |
You told me to go after her,and l didn't. |
00:33:05 |
lt wasn't planned,Mitch. |
00:33:07 |
l know how this looks. |
00:33:09 |
But,Mitch,l also know how it feels. |
00:33:11 |
How does this feel,you son of a bitch? |
00:33:13 |
Oh,my God! |
00:33:15 |
- What happened? |
00:33:18 |
Everybody,take it easy. |
00:33:19 |
You're not helping. |
00:33:20 |
Oh,no.l'm sorry. |
00:33:23 |
Oh,darling. |
00:33:24 |
Get some ice. |
00:33:26 |
Dan,you all right? |
00:33:27 |
You OK? |
00:33:28 |
Marie! |
00:33:31 |
No,don't go! |
00:33:32 |
l don't know what we were thinking. |
00:33:37 |
l'm sorry. |
00:33:40 |
Don't go. |
00:33:46 |
Dad?Get... |
00:33:48 |
Dad,wait! |
00:33:50 |
What are you doing? |
00:33:52 |
Dad! |
00:34:06 |
All right,this is your summons |
00:34:09 |
One last thing. |
00:34:10 |
You need to surrender your license. |
00:34:27 |
You have guests. |
00:34:33 |
Speak of the devil. |
00:34:34 |
Cindy Lamson. |
00:34:36 |
Editor of special features, |
00:34:38 |
-Hi. |
00:34:40 |
- Nice to meet you. |
00:34:41 |
We've been sitting here |
00:34:45 |
We've especially enjoyed the pleasure |
00:34:50 |
- Hot cider? |
00:34:51 |
That looks... |
00:34:52 |
Thank you very much. |
00:34:54 |
Looks great. |
00:34:54 |
Thanks. |
00:34:57 |
Father? |
00:34:59 |
Hot cider? |
00:35:00 |
Not only are you a murderer of love, |
00:35:03 |
but you're the worst parent ever. |
00:35:07 |
Sweet. |
00:35:09 |
Well,um,as you probably know, |
00:35:11 |
we have met with two other candidates, |
00:35:13 |
but my father and l are confident |
00:35:20 |
Uh,girls. |
00:35:21 |
You can leave if you like. |
00:35:23 |
lf it's all right, |
00:35:26 |
We like to keep the family involved. |
00:35:28 |
Well,Dan,here,he knows |
00:35:29 |
all about keeping things in the family. |
00:35:32 |
Don't you,Dan? |
00:35:33 |
That's why we're so drawn to you. |
00:35:35 |
What you represent in your column, |
00:35:36 |
your moral values. |
00:35:38 |
The personal characteristics |
00:35:41 |
Very impressive. |
00:35:42 |
Honesty,trustworthiness... |
00:35:44 |
And we have great plans for you,Dan. |
00:35:46 |
What we try to do is what you |
00:35:51 |
What's that? |
00:35:52 |
Put family first. |
00:35:55 |
OK.OK. |
00:35:56 |
Here's the thing. |
00:35:59 |
Somebody hasn't been |
00:36:04 |
l'm not sure what that means. |
00:36:18 |
Go away. |
00:36:20 |
You're a liar and a hypocrite. |
00:36:22 |
Cheating with your brother's girlfriend? |
00:36:23 |
How long did you know her? |
00:36:25 |
Two moving violations and a collision? |
00:36:27 |
Was that part of the plan? |
00:36:29 |
Worst of all,you blew off Lilly. |
00:36:32 |
She's been wanting to show |
00:36:35 |
But you never showed up. |
00:38:11 |
l really messed up. |
00:38:12 |
- No,you didn't. |
00:38:15 |
What l did to Lilly. |
00:38:16 |
Don't forget Mitch. |
00:38:18 |
Oh,John. |
00:38:19 |
And those newspaper people. |
00:38:21 |
Admittedly,not a good day for you,honey. |
00:38:26 |
lf l just stay focused |
00:38:29 |
Oh,please. |
00:38:30 |
You know,love is messy. |
00:38:33 |
l should know better. |
00:38:35 |
- l hurt my kids. |
00:38:38 |
Honey,you've made some mistakes. |
00:38:40 |
Many,so many. |
00:38:42 |
Falling for Marie wasn't one of them. |
00:38:49 |
Can somebody get me another box,please? |
00:38:52 |
Yep,yep.Coming. |
00:38:56 |
Mitch. |
00:39:00 |
Mitch,l... |
00:39:06 |
lf it was anybody else... |
00:39:08 |
l am so... |
00:39:14 |
Hold that thought. |
00:39:21 |
Hey,beautiful. |
00:39:42 |
Girls,l'd like to talk |
00:40:00 |
OK,then.All of you. |
00:40:12 |
l know l messed up. |
00:40:13 |
Big time. |
00:40:14 |
Yep. |
00:40:15 |
Yes,you did. |
00:40:16 |
Now,your mom... |
00:40:22 |
l miss your mom. |
00:40:24 |
All the time and l always will. |
00:40:26 |
Mom's gone. |
00:40:28 |
Aw,honey. |
00:40:29 |
l see her every day. |
00:40:31 |
l see her in your goodness,Jane. |
00:40:33 |
And,Cara,your passion. |
00:40:38 |
And,Lilly,you have her eyes. |
00:40:41 |
And her smile. |
00:40:45 |
So here's what l'm going to do: |
00:40:47 |
l am grounding myself for life. |
00:40:51 |
l'm sticking with you. |
00:40:52 |
l am going to be with you... |
00:40:55 |
You're with us every day. |
00:40:57 |
l'm not going anywhere. |
00:41:00 |
See,l got a little confused with Marie, |
00:41:03 |
but that is over. |
00:41:05 |
OK? |
00:41:08 |
l kinda lost my head. |
00:41:13 |
Got a little stupid because l love her. |
00:41:17 |
That's... |
00:41:18 |
That's not... |
00:41:21 |
l don't love her. |
00:41:22 |
And that's not what l meant. |
00:41:23 |
l mean,how could l love her? |
00:41:25 |
- l've only known her... |
00:41:27 |
Yeah. |
00:41:29 |
And how can you know in three days? |
00:41:37 |
l don't know. |
00:41:39 |
Yes,l do.l love her. |
00:41:42 |
l love her. |
00:41:53 |
Then go get her. |
00:41:57 |
We so prefer her to you. |
00:42:09 |
Go. |
00:42:14 |
Now. |
00:42:25 |
Honey.Honey.For the road. |
00:42:37 |
What is it? |
00:42:38 |
- l can't do it.- You must. |
00:42:40 |
l don't have a license. |
00:42:59 |
l'm pretty good with maps. |
00:43:02 |
This is so queer. |
00:43:05 |
But l wouldn't miss it for anything. |
00:43:18 |
Dear readers,for most of you, |
00:43:20 |
this is my first column in your paper. |
00:43:24 |
In the future,I will be |
00:43:26 |
but today, |
00:43:28 |
I wanna break from my usual format |
00:43:30 |
and talk to you about |
00:43:33 |
Not so much my plan for this column, |
00:43:36 |
more like life plans. |
00:43:37 |
How we all make them. |
00:43:39 |
And how we hope that our kids make good, |
00:43:42 |
smar,safe plans of their own. |
00:43:46 |
But if we're really honest with ourselves, |
00:43:48 |
most of the time our plans |
00:43:57 |
So instead of asking our young people, |
00:43:59 |
''What are your plans? |
00:44:01 |
What do you plan to do with your life?'' |
00:44:03 |
maybe we should tell them this: |
00:44:05 |
plan to be surprised. |