|
Daria Is It College Yet
|
| 00:01:13 |
I must say I'm honored you've chosen to spend your valuable Saturday night with |
| 00:01:17 |
me. What happened? Tom's parents send him off for more forty-watt bulbs? |
| 00:01:21 |
I was just craving a bit of sisterhood, so long as it doesn't involve my actual |
| 00:01:25 |
sister. What'd you do today? |
| 00:01:27 |
I actually accomplished something... I mean, other than getting up. I applied to |
| 00:01:31 |
Lawndale State and State University. |
| 00:01:33 |
Really? Why? I thought you wanted to go to Boston Fine Arts College? |
| 00:01:37 |
I do want to go to BFAC, but unlike Lawndale State and State U, you have to have |
| 00:01:41 |
talent to get in. So they give you extra time to put together a killer art portfolio. |
| 00:01:45 |
How's that going? |
| 00:01:46 |
Why, it's going so well that when you called to go out, I only cried tears of |
| 00:01:50 |
relief for ten minutes. What about you? Still thinking about... Bromwell? |
| 00:01:54 |
They don't really talk like that there... I hope. Anyway, I'm applying because |
| 00:01:59 |
it's an outstanding university, not because the students engage in the rectal |
| 00:02:03 |
transport of steel rods. |
| 00:02:05 |
The Equestrian Club must be in constant pain. |
| 00:02:07 |
What about your safeties? |
| 00:02:08 |
I've applied to Raft, Ellis, Lloyd... |
| 00:02:11 |
Raft's your safety? Gutsy, Morgendorffer. |
| 00:02:13 |
No, no, no. Raft's my second choice. My parents won't think I've sent out enough |
| 00:02:18 |
applications if I only get rejected from one place. |
| 00:02:21 |
Hey, Raft's in Boston, right? Wouldn't it be great if we went to college in the |
| 00:02:24 |
same town? We could meet on the weekends to eat pizza and complain. |
| 00:02:27 |
Well, they say college is all about broadening your horizons. |
| 00:02:33 |
Gaaaah! Six hundred dollars for shoes? That you walk in? On the ground? |
| 00:02:38 |
Relax, Jake. I'll take care of it. Quinn! I want you to come downstairs and |
| 00:02:43 |
explain yourself! |
| 00:02:45 |
Finally, the mystery will be solved. |
| 00:02:47 |
Sandi, I'm just saying tangerine isn't as orange as... call you back. |
| 00:02:52 |
Sorry, Fashion Club crisis. |
| 00:02:54 |
Never mind. What's this six hundred dollar charge at Cashman's? |
| 00:02:57 |
But Mom, I actually saved money by buying faux alligator instead of real alligator. |
| 00:03:02 |
Well, you can also save your excuses. The shoes are going back. |
| 00:03:05 |
But I can't return them. Final markdown. However, if it makes you feel better, |
| 00:03:09 |
I promise never to buy on sale again. |
| 00:03:11 |
You're not buying anything, period, until you pay off this bill. |
| 00:03:15 |
I understand. I shall require a substantial increase in my allowance. |
| 00:03:18 |
No! |
| 00:03:19 |
But you know I don't have any money. It's why I have to buy on credit. Let's |
| 00:03:23 |
work together, Mother, and attack the problem at its source. |
| 00:03:26 |
Good idea. You'll have to go out and get a job. |
| 00:03:29 |
Uh! Water. |
| 00:03:32 |
Hope she doesn't get any on the shoes. |
| 00:03:34 |
Gah! |
| 00:03:35 |
Sit down, Jake. She's not wearing them. |
| 00:03:37 |
Shouldn't you be working on your college applications? |
| 00:03:40 |
Hey, yeah! You know, Daria, I'd be happy to give your application to Middleton a |
| 00:03:44 |
quick going over. I think I know a thing or two about what they like at the old |
| 00:03:47 |
alma mater. |
| 00:03:48 |
Ummm, gee, thanks. Yes... I... uh, you're right. I should be working on my |
| 00:03:53 |
applications. Right now. |
| 00:03:56 |
You know, Jake, just because we went to Middleton doesn't mean Daria will. She's |
| 00:04:01 |
applying to a lot of different places. |
| 00:04:03 |
Oh, sure. But why would she want to go to just any old college when she could |
| 00:04:06 |
follow in our footsteps? Middleton's a Morgendorffer tradition. |
| 00:04:10 |
So's military school. |
| 00:04:11 |
Bite your tongue, Helen. No daughter of mine is ever going to share a latrine |
| 00:04:15 |
with fifty hateful boys who can sniff out weakness like day-old cheese. |
| 00:04:19 |
Let's hope not, dear. |
| 00:04:24 |
Everyone hates the message board miscreant, but now you can do something about it! |
| 00:04:28 |
Flame wars: the next generation, tonight on Sick, Sad World! |
| 00:04:32 |
Finish your college applications yet? |
| 00:04:34 |
All except Bromwell's. Mom and Dad want to want to review the alumni section to |
| 00:04:37 |
make sure I didn't leave anyone out. |
| 00:04:39 |
That shouldn't take more than a week or two. |
| 00:04:41 |
Did you ask about going up to Newtown to visit Bromwell with me? |
| 00:04:43 |
It's cool with my mother as long as your mother's definitely chaperoning and we |
| 00:04:47 |
can drive up to Boston afterwards to check out a couple of other colleges. |
| 00:04:51 |
That's the plan. Boston's where all my safeties are. |
| 00:04:53 |
Umm, mine, too. |
| 00:04:55 |
Hey, don't worry, Daria. You'll get into Bromwell with your incredible test |
| 00:04:58 |
scores and grades. I'll get in the old fashioned way: bribery and nepotism. |
| 00:05:01 |
Gee, when you put it that way, it all sounds so fair and just. |
| 00:05:09 |
Guys, it is so nice of you to take me out on my birthday. |
| 00:05:12 |
Our pleasure, Stacy. |
| 00:05:14 |
Just because the rest of us had dates on our birthdays... |
| 00:05:17 |
Oh, yes, Sandi. You mentioned that. Boy, I can't believe I'm another year older. |
| 00:05:22 |
Time goes by so fast. |
| 00:05:23 |
I know. Just yesterday I was playing with makeup starter kits, and today I'm |
| 00:05:28 |
being forced out in the working world. And I thought these were supposed to be |
| 00:05:32 |
the carefree years. |
| 00:05:33 |
I know, Quinn. Why don't you get a job here? There are lots of cute guys, and |
| 00:05:37 |
the hostesses get to dress up and wear hoopy earrings. |
| 00:05:40 |
Stacy! Are you suggesting that a Fashion Club member serve the public? |
| 00:05:44 |
Stacy, tsk. |
| 00:05:47 |
Uh, geez, Sandi, it's not that bad an idea. This place is sort of fun, and it |
| 00:05:52 |
wouldn't be like the kind of job where you'd endanger your nails or anything. |
| 00:05:55 |
Mmmm... good point. |
| 00:05:57 |
Fine, if you want to sully the fine name... |
| 00:06:00 |
Surprise... |
| 00:06:01 |
Make a wish, Stacy! |
| 00:06:05 |
And don't worry. I'm sure that chocolate won't cause your sensitive skin to |
| 00:06:09 |
break out. |
| 00:06:12 |
Yay! |
| 00:06:13 |
Thanks, guys. |
| 00:06:14 |
What'd you wish for? |
| 00:06:16 |
Ummm; nothing. |
| 00:06:17 |
Come on, Stacy. Tell us! Don't be your usual drippy self. |
| 00:06:22 |
Nothing. Anyway, it didn't come true. |
| 00:06:29 |
How did your father's meeting at the bank go? |
| 00:06:30 |
Not good. My Dad says I can't go to Vance unless they give me a scholarship. We |
| 00:06:34 |
can only afford State University, and they don't even have a business school. |
| 00:06:37 |
Oh, Mack. You've worked so hard. You've just got to get that scholarship. |
| 00:06:41 |
What about you? How are your applications going? |
| 00:06:43 |
Well, I got the big ones in today. Turner and Crestmore. |
| 00:06:46 |
Crestmore... the dream of dreams. |
| 00:06:49 |
Hmmm. |
| 00:06:49 |
What's wrong? |
| 00:06:50 |
It's a top school and everything, but I'd really rather go to Turner. |
| 00:06:53 |
Your father's alma mater? He must love that. |
| 00:06:56 |
He doesn't know I applied. |
| 00:06:57 |
Why? |
| 00:06:58 |
Because he wouldn't let me go anyway. He says not even a great African-American |
| 00:07:01 |
college like Turner can beat the Crestmore name on a resume. |
| 00:07:05 |
Oh, man. That sucks. |
| 00:07:06 |
You know, my grandmother was in the first Turner graduating class to admit |
| 00:07:10 |
women. I'd be carrying on a tradition. Plus, I'd finally get a break from having |
| 00:07:14 |
to be the perfect Jodie doll at a mostly-white school. |
| 00:07:17 |
I hear that. |
| 00:07:17 |
I wish my father did. I can always transfer to Crestmore after a year or two. At |
| 00:07:22 |
least, I'd find what Turner's like. But his mind's made up. |
| 00:07:25 |
Well, Crestmore hasn't accepted you yet. |
| 00:07:27 |
Hey, maybe we should both go to State University. Then we wouldn't have to worry |
| 00:07:31 |
about how to get together on weekends. |
| 00:07:32 |
Hi, Jodie. Hi, Mack. You know, I applied to State University, too. They've one |
| 00:07:37 |
of the best cheerleading squads in the country. |
| 00:07:40 |
God help me! |
| 00:07:40 |
Ummm, that's nice, Brittany. Kevin, do you know where you're going? |
| 00:07:44 |
It's a secret, man. |
| 00:07:45 |
Why? Is the school embarrassed? |
| 00:07:47 |
Why would it be embarrassed? I'm a QB. It's not like I'm a brain or anything. |
| 00:07:51 |
Truer words were never spoken. |
| 00:07:52 |
Thanks, man! |
| 00:07:54 |
Tsk, tsk. Oh, Kevin. Well, maybe you'll find a job that doesn't require the |
| 00:08:00 |
ability to read and write. |
| 00:08:01 |
I'm so depressed! |
| 00:08:02 |
Janet! |
| 00:08:03 |
Do you know what today is? D-Day, the fifth anniversary of my D-vorce. |
| 00:08:08 |
Janet, I'm sorry. |
| 00:08:09 |
You're sorry? You didn't spend years of your life telling him again and again to |
| 00:08:13 |
get his grubby hands off of the remote, quit his damned coughing, stop behaving |
| 00:08:18 |
like an imbecile, only to be tossed into the trash like a broken record! |
| 00:08:23 |
Um, Janet! I can certainly understand your, um, sadness. |
| 00:08:27 |
Why, marriage is a sacred union that's supposed to represent the love and trust |
| 00:08:32 |
two people... |
| 00:08:33 |
Skinny, what did you say? |
| 00:08:34 |
Marriage is a sacred union that... |
| 00:08:36 |
Yeeees! |
| 00:08:37 |
Euh... yes? |
| 00:08:38 |
I accept! |
| 00:08:40 |
Um, hmmm, huh? |
| 00:08:42 |
My silly, silly Skinny. You don't have to ask again. Yes, I will marry you! |
| 00:08:49 |
Oh, dear! |
| 00:08:54 |
Daria, the Sloanes are here. |
| 00:08:55 |
Hey, is Middleton is on this whirlwind college tour of yours, kiddo? |
| 00:08:58 |
Umm, not this trip. |
| 00:09:00 |
Oh, um, Daria, you know, some people just aren't cut out for military school. |
| 00:09:05 |
I know, Dad, but I think it's admirable the way you've managed to pull your life |
| 00:09:09 |
together despite that early trauma. |
| 00:09:11 |
Hey, thanks kiddo. I... What? |
| 00:09:13 |
Now Daria, when you meet the college representatives, please try to be enthusiastic! |
| 00:09:19 |
Less unenthusiastic...? |
| 00:09:22 |
At least promise me you won't physically assault anyone. |
| 00:09:27 |
Lindy, this is Quinn. I just hired her to be our new hostess. |
| 00:09:30 |
Great! I can really use the help. Have you done hostessing before? |
| 00:09:33 |
Actually, um, this is my first job. |
| 00:09:36 |
Really? Are you still in high school? |
| 00:09:38 |
Umm, yeah. Although, people say I dress like I'm older. |
| 00:09:42 |
Well, this isn't all that different from high school, except instead of telling |
| 00:09:45 |
teachers your homework isn't ready, you're telling customers their table isn't |
| 00:09:48 |
ready. And they can't take a single point off your grade. |
| 00:09:53 |
Tom, if I'd known you were going to wear those scuffed-up sneakers, I would have |
| 00:09:57 |
bought you new ones. |
| 00:09:58 |
But I just got new ones a year ago. |
| 00:09:59 |
That's exactly what your father would say. You two are so stuck in your ways. |
| 00:10:03 |
We're stuck in our ways? Two sugars, a tiny slice of lemon would be dreamy, just |
| 00:10:08 |
place it on the saucer, dear, I don't like it in the cup. |
| 00:10:11 |
I can't help if I'm particular about my tea. Oh, look. We're here! |
| 00:10:19 |
Boy, did I do well tonight. A lot of the guys trying to distract their dates |
| 00:10:22 |
from their toupees by leaving big tips. |
| 00:10:24 |
Hmm. Must be first dates. |
| 00:10:25 |
Really? Why? |
| 00:10:26 |
Well, not that I date inconsistent tippers, but some of my friends say that guys |
| 00:10:31 |
tip twenty percent on the first date, seventeen on the second, and fifteen on |
| 00:10:34 |
the third. Although to be fair, a lot of people order more food on the third |
| 00:10:37 |
date because they're not as worried about looking like pigs. |
| 00:10:42 |
Quinn, you're a riot. |
| 00:10:44 |
I know! |
| 00:10:45 |
Hey, I don't know if you guys are interested, but my roommate and I are having a |
| 00:10:48 |
party on Saturday. |
| 00:10:49 |
Sounds cool. |
| 00:10:50 |
I'd love to go! |
| 00:10:51 |
Great. Let me write down my address. |
| 00:10:56 |
You call that a tax cut? I've seen haircuts more drastic. |
| 00:11:00 |
Um, Dad? Could I talk to you a second? |
| 00:11:02 |
Sure! What's on your mind? |
| 00:11:03 |
Well, I've been thinking a lot about Crestmore, and a lot about Turner. |
| 00:11:07 |
Turner's a great school. Not nearly as elite as Crestmore, though. |
| 00:11:10 |
That's just it. I don't want to go to an elitist school. |
| 00:11:13 |
Sure you do. |
| 00:11:14 |
I want to go to a school where I fit in, where I can be myself and relax for |
| 00:11:18 |
once and really focus on learning. I want to go to Turner. At least for a year |
| 00:11:22 |
or two. |
| 00:11:22 |
You want to go to college to relax? That doesn't sound like my Honor Society daughter. |
| 00:11:27 |
Relax socially; stop being the black kid, and just being a kid. I'm tired of |
| 00:11:31 |
being in the extreme minority, and I don't want to go to a place where people |
| 00:11:34 |
might think I got in just because I'm African-American. |
| 00:11:37 |
Let people think what they want. |
| 00:11:39 |
But Dad, you don't know what it's like. You went to a black high school and then |
| 00:11:42 |
to Turner. |
| 00:11:43 |
Because I HAD to. If I had a Crestmore degree in my pocket... Jodie, their |
| 00:11:47 |
graduates are literally running this country. Think of how that degree can help |
| 00:11:51 |
you catapult ahead. Where is that Landon spirit? |
| 00:12:00 |
What's shaking, bacon? |
| 00:12:02 |
I don't smell anything. Hey, cool sculpture. It's like a comment on the |
| 00:12:07 |
underbelly of pain... or something. |
| 00:12:10 |
Actually, it's a comment on BFAC's incredibly high admission standards. |
| 00:12:13 |
Um, why do you want to go to art college? You're already an artist. |
| 00:12:18 |
I know. But I want to be a starving artist, so I need to ring up more debt. |
| 00:12:22 |
Well, I'd never go to music school. I wouldn't want any teachers trying to |
| 00:12:26 |
corrupt my vision. |
| 00:12:28 |
Can you imagine what Spiral would sound like if we were, like, |
| 00:12:31 |
forced to practice, even when we don't want to? |
| 00:12:35 |
Umm... oh, lookie, missed a spot. |
| 00:12:39 |
There it is, Tom: the place where your father and I met. I was a sophomore, |
| 00:12:44 |
Angier was a senior. It was a free concert by the Carpenters. |
| 00:12:47 |
Um, I hope you weren't injured in the ensuing riot. |
| 00:12:51 |
Well, I guess Daria and I better go in for our meetings. |
| 00:12:53 |
Good luck! |
| 00:12:54 |
Thanks. |
| 00:12:56 |
Hi. We have appointments to see Lisa Goldwin. |
| 00:13:01 |
So that's why the skating rink has that sign saying "clothes required." |
| 00:13:05 |
Well, according to my grandfather, anyway. Then again, his motto is, "never let |
| 00:13:08 |
the truth get in the way of a good story." |
| 00:13:10 |
Tom, it was really nice meeting you. |
| 00:13:12 |
You too, Lisa. Daria, I guess it's your turn. See you later. |
| 00:13:15 |
Come on in, Daria. Are you as full of Bromwell lore as Tom? |
| 00:13:18 |
Um, I doubt it. He seems to be really full of it. |
| 00:13:23 |
Daria, now that you've had a chance to drink in the campus, so to speak, what |
| 00:13:28 |
are your impressions. |
| 00:13:29 |
Talk about the atmosphere? No, that's frivolous. The resources? No, she'll think |
| 00:13:34 |
I mean money. The campus? No, shallow. Oh no, inappropriately long pause. Talk, |
| 00:13:41 |
say anything. |
| 00:13:42 |
Ummm, I like the campus, the dorms, and, um, libraries... the learning... feeling? |
| 00:13:50 |
The learning feeling? Could I be any less articulate? |
| 00:13:53 |
Yes, we like those things, too. Tell me, Daria, aside from gaining a first-rate |
| 00:13:58 |
education from one of the finest faculties around, why did you want to attend |
| 00:14:02 |
Bromwell? |
| 00:14:03 |
Should I talk about wanting to be a writer and hoping Bromwell will help me find |
| 00:14:06 |
my voice? Oh, God, how pretentious can I get? |
| 00:14:10 |
Um, well, I guess I'm hoping that if I come here, I may be exposed to, um, |
| 00:14:15 |
points of view I never considered. |
| 00:14:18 |
Right, education. But what are you hoping to reap from your Bromwell experience? |
| 00:14:23 |
Reap? Reap... reap reap! |
| 00:14:26 |
Um, I hope to reap... |
| 00:14:28 |
God, what does she want? |
| 00:14:30 |
Ummm, a chance to grow...? |
| 00:14:32 |
I did not say that! |
| 00:14:34 |
You're asking me? |
| 00:14:35 |
Um, well, I think at Bromwell, I can, umm... |
| 00:14:40 |
Find your voice, perhaps? |
| 00:14:42 |
Hmm, yes, exactly. Find my voice. |
| 00:14:46 |
Note to self: stop thinking so much, Morgendorffer, you idiot! |
| 00:14:51 |
Daria, is everything all right? |
| 00:14:53 |
Ummm, do you think we might possibly start over, and this time, I'll just answer |
| 00:14:58 |
your questions instead of agonizing over them internally and then blurting out |
| 00:15:01 |
something asinine? |
| 00:15:03 |
Sure. |
| 00:15:05 |
And so I seated this one couple right next to this other couple, and all of a |
| 00:15:08 |
sudden, the guy at the first table started screaming at the girl at the second |
| 00:15:10 |
table. I mean, how was I to know that she dumped that guy for the other one? |
| 00:15:14 |
Quinn, that's terrible! |
| 00:15:15 |
I know! The first guy was a lot cuter. Hey Sandi! |
| 00:15:19 |
How are you? |
| 00:15:21 |
What did you say Sandi? |
| 00:15:24 |
Whaaat? |
| 00:15:28 |
Can't talk. Laryngitis. Sandi! You lost your voice! |
| 00:15:36 |
So once I stopped worrying about what to say and just said it, I thought the |
| 00:15:40 |
interview went okay, but by then, I'd used up five of my fifteen minutes. |
| 00:15:44 |
Your interview was only fifteen minutes? I mean... |
| 00:15:48 |
Ummm, we should probably be get going if we want to make Boston by dinner. |
| 00:15:52 |
Right. Mom? We should be... |
| 00:15:54 |
Look, Tom. It's Bill Woods. |
| 00:15:56 |
You're right. He's a lit professor here; he was also in the lawn tennis team |
| 00:15:59 |
with my father. |
| 00:16:00 |
Of course. |
| 00:16:01 |
Kay! Tom! I don't believe it! Why didn't tell me you were coming to town? |
| 00:16:05 |
Well, I knew we'd only be here for the day, but... please, Bill, do join us! |
| 00:16:09 |
Actually, I'm on my way to a meeting. MacArthur winners get so testy if they're |
| 00:16:13 |
kept waiting. How about lunch tomorrow? |
| 00:16:16 |
Umm, Mom? |
| 00:16:17 |
We'd love to, but I'm afraid we have to go to Boston and look at some other schools. |
| 00:16:21 |
How about a 7:30 breakfast? You can still make Boston by noon. What |
| 00:16:25 |
do you say, Tom? You can update me on your interview here. Maybe I can even |
| 00:16:28 |
throw a little influence your way. Not that you'll need it. |
| 00:16:31 |
That would be great. Daria had an interview, too. |
| 00:16:33 |
Then it's a date. I'll see everyone tomorrow in the faculty dining room. |
| 00:16:37 |
Daria, you don't mind, do you? |
| 00:16:39 |
Umm. No, it's fine. |
| 00:16:48 |
Mom, Bill was supposed to meet us at seven-thirty. It's eight. |
| 00:16:51 |
I promise. If he's not here in another... there he is! |
| 00:16:55 |
Sorry I'm a little late, but I just couldn't get my publisher off the phone. He |
| 00:16:58 |
does love to chat. |
| 00:17:04 |
Well, the worst of rush hour should be over, so with a little luck, we'll be in |
| 00:17:08 |
Boston by one. |
| 00:17:09 |
Yeah, that'll be plenty of time. |
| 00:17:15 |
Oh dear. |
| 00:17:18 |
Oh my. |
| 00:17:21 |
"And so, due to her inability to manage Fashion Club meetings and a minor |
| 00:17:26 |
part-time job, Quinn has been granted permission to take an officially |
| 00:17:30 |
sanctioned sabtical..." "sabbactical..." |
| 00:17:38 |
Let me help. "Saaaa..." |
| 00:17:44 |
"Vacation from her vice-presidential duties." |
| 00:17:47 |
Ooohhh. |
| 00:17:52 |
Daria, my sincerest apologies for arriving here so late. |
| 00:17:55 |
Mom, it's not your fault. It's raining, and there was that pile-up, and then |
| 00:17:59 |
that really slow truck. |
| 00:18:00 |
Daria, if you like, maybe we could stay on an extra day. |
| 00:18:03 |
Um, I don't think the Admissions Office is open on Saturday. |
| 00:18:07 |
Oh, dear. Well, let's at least drive through the campus and try to get some |
| 00:18:10 |
sense of it. |
| 00:18:13 |
Wow, deserted. |
| 00:18:15 |
Daria, just let me know if you want to pull over. |
| 00:18:17 |
Good thing we didn't get to Bromwell this late, huh? |
| 00:18:22 |
Janet, about our... situation, and all. I was thinking... things are moving |
| 00:18:27 |
awfully fast. |
| 00:18:28 |
Exactly. None of this long engagement crap. We've got to get cranking before my |
| 00:18:34 |
eggs dry up! |
| 00:18:34 |
Janet, we really have to talk. |
| 00:18:37 |
We'll live at my house. Your house, with all those plants and macramé... |
| 00:18:40 |
See, Janet, that's what I mean. This talk about moving in... |
| 00:18:43 |
Now, about the honeymoon, I've always had an itch to learn parasailing. |
| 00:18:48 |
Oh, dear! |
| 00:18:51 |
Absolutely, Eric! Accidents can happen. Listen, they're bound to have pictures |
| 00:18:55 |
of seagulls covered in oil; maybe we can have pictures of sailors covered in |
| 00:18:59 |
guano. Okay, Eric, bye. |
| 00:19:03 |
Daria, how was your trip? |
| 00:19:05 |
Let's see. We spent so much time at Bromwell that we only had time for the |
| 00:19:09 |
drive-by tour of Raft, but I can safely report it has nice smooth roads. |
| 00:19:14 |
Oh, that's a shame. But, at least you got to see Bromwell. What did you think? |
| 00:19:18 |
Well, it's pretty obvious you have to be in Who's Who to teach there, the |
| 00:19:22 |
libraries are big enough to park a jumbo jet in, and what can I say about the |
| 00:19:26 |
dorm room's high speed computer lines, except that hacking the Pentagon just got |
| 00:19:30 |
a whole lot easier. |
| 00:19:31 |
That sounds wonderful! |
| 00:19:32 |
Yeah. The only drawback is trying to find your classes through the fog of smugness. |
| 00:19:37 |
Yes, it's a small price to pay for a Bromwell education. |
| 00:19:40 |
So you don't care either that I never got to see Raft. |
| 00:19:43 |
What? |
| 00:19:44 |
Hey, Daria! Guess what came in the mail? The Middleton course catalog! And guess |
| 00:19:48 |
what? They've eliminated all the requirements, so you can take whatever you want! |
| 00:19:52 |
You know, Bromwell isn't the only university in the world. |
| 00:19:55 |
Bromwell? I was talking about Middleton. |
| 00:19:58 |
Wait a minute! Bromwell's not a military school! Yeah, Bromwell! Great idea, Daria! |
| 00:20:04 |
Leave me alone. |
| 00:20:06 |
What's the matter with her? |
| 00:20:09 |
"Will you accept our gift of a dollar just to answer a few simple questions |
| 00:20:12 |
about potency?" Yeah! |
| 00:20:19 |
Hey, Quinn, glad you could make it. These are my friends, Cain and Don. |
| 00:20:23 |
What's your major? |
| 00:20:24 |
Um, I don't have a major per se. I'm kind of still in high school. |
| 00:20:28 |
High school? Lucky... not! |
| 00:20:31 |
But I'm planning on going to college. |
| 00:20:33 |
College is absolutely essential. The concerts and parties are so much better. |
| 00:20:37 |
I know. I heard "Boys R Guys" are coming. |
| 00:20:39 |
Yeah. Can you believe it? Are they bad enough? |
| 00:20:43 |
Awful. |
| 00:20:44 |
Yeah! They're terrible! So, what bands do you guys like? |
| 00:20:52 |
I can't submit you to BFAC. You suck. You all suck, too. Or maybe it's time for |
| 00:21:00 |
Janey's sugar break. |
| 00:21:03 |
Oh, look, this month's mail. Wow, State University and Lawndale State. "We |
| 00:21:11 |
regret to inform you that..." "Due to an unprecedented number of |
| 00:21:17 |
applications..." Damn. |
| 00:21:20 |
Huh? |
| 00:21:20 |
Both the colleges I applied to rejected me. I knew I shouldn't have taken the |
| 00:21:24 |
math portion of my SATs. |
| 00:21:26 |
Oh. Hey, sorry. Wasn't there some other college? |
| 00:21:31 |
BFAC? They're waiting for my portfolio. Hmm. No point in busting my ass to |
| 00:21:35 |
finish that. |
| 00:21:36 |
No kidding. Who are these people to judge you, anyway? |
| 00:21:40 |
What do you mean? |
| 00:21:41 |
Hey Janey, if they could create art, they wouldn't be teaching it. |
| 00:21:46 |
You know, you're actually beginning to make sense. Why waste four years learning |
| 00:21:50 |
a bunch of useless technique and theory I'll probably just have to unlearn if I |
| 00:21:54 |
ever want to create my own style? |
| 00:21:55 |
I've come to a decision. I'm not going to college. |
| 00:21:58 |
Good plan. |
| 00:21:59 |
You and I will pursue our muse together, hunker down here in our creative |
| 00:22:03 |
bunker, periodically issuing forth new works that will invariably rock the art |
| 00:22:07 |
and music worlds, respectively. |
| 00:22:09 |
Hmmm. This isn't going to require of me to get up for breakfast, is it? |
| 00:22:16 |
And when my friend woke up, they had stolen his liver. That's what he said. |
| 00:22:20 |
Although the way he drinks, it's possible he just left it in a bar somewhere. |
| 00:22:25 |
I wonder who her designer is? |
| 00:22:27 |
I know, Alicia's dress is awesome! |
| 00:22:30 |
You like it? |
| 00:22:30 |
Sure. That's what you meant, right? You weren't trashing her? |
| 00:22:34 |
No, of course not. |
| 00:22:35 |
I didn't think so. You're not the type who has to build herself up by putting |
| 00:22:39 |
others down. I hate people like that. |
| 00:22:41 |
Yeah, me too. This mirror is so pretty. Where did you get it? |
| 00:22:45 |
I made it. |
| 00:22:46 |
Really? You know how to make glass? |
| 00:22:48 |
I bought the actual mirror, but I painted the tiles and put the frame together. |
| 00:22:52 |
I'll make one for you if you like. |
| 00:22:53 |
Lindy, that's really, really nice, but I can't pay you right away. |
| 00:22:57 |
Quinn, don't be silly! It's a gift. I make mirrors for all my good friends. I'm |
| 00:23:02 |
gonna grab another beer, and then you can tell me what colors of tiles you like. |
| 00:23:05 |
Okay. |
| 00:23:11 |
Huh? When will Ms. Li stop trying to collect fingerprint samples? |
| 00:23:17 |
Oh. |
| 00:23:21 |
The Liquid Dinner? |
| 00:23:25 |
I hate bad bang fluff days. |
| 00:23:27 |
Oh, Quinn! I have to talk to you about something just awful! |
| 00:23:30 |
Hum, Stacy, if this is about how your little toe is all knobbly... |
| 00:23:33 |
Not that. You know when I made that birthday wish at Governor's Park? Well, I |
| 00:23:36 |
didn't mean to, but Sandi was talking and it was ruining my concentration, and, |
| 00:23:40 |
well, I wished she'd just shut up and I blew out the candle and it was too late |
| 00:23:43 |
to take back the wish and then Sandi came down with laryngitis! |
| 00:23:45 |
That's terrible! It's like that movie where that lady put that curse on that guy |
| 00:23:49 |
and he kept losing weight, although I still haven't figured out what was |
| 00:23:52 |
supposed to be bad about that. |
| 00:23:54 |
I don't know what to do, and I don't want to tell Sandi, because you know how |
| 00:23:56 |
her eyes get all narrow and her lip curls and she gets that lizard face. |
| 00:24:00 |
Stacy, this is easily solved. Just lift the curse. |
| 00:24:03 |
But how do you do that? I didn't know I was cursing her! |
| 00:24:05 |
God, Stacy! What do I look like, a whodoo expert? I don't know how to lift a |
| 00:24:10 |
curse. You're gonna have to find someone who does. |
| 00:24:14 |
I'm so excited! I just found out I got in the Great Prairie State University! |
| 00:24:19 |
You did? Me too! |
| 00:24:21 |
So did I! |
| 00:24:21 |
Me, too! |
| 00:24:22 |
Wow! It was really nice of them to take all of us! |
| 00:24:25 |
Hey, how's it going? |
| 00:24:26 |
Kevvie! Guess what? Practically the whole cheerleading squad is going to Great |
| 00:24:30 |
Prairie State University. |
| 00:24:31 |
That's nice, babe. |
| 00:24:32 |
Wait, where are you going? |
| 00:24:34 |
Practice. |
| 00:24:35 |
Ooh! |
| 00:24:36 |
Brittany? Didn't you mean where's he going to college? |
| 00:24:39 |
Hey, yeah! |
| 00:24:40 |
Brittany, isn't football season over? |
| 00:24:42 |
Hey, yeah! Kevvie! |
| 00:24:47 |
Hey, shake the hand of a Vance University man. |
| 00:24:50 |
You got the scholarship? Oh, Mack! That's great! |
| 00:24:53 |
You're actually shaking my hand? |
| 00:24:55 |
Oh, Mack! |
| 00:24:57 |
Is something the matter? |
| 00:24:58 |
What could be the matter? Everything's perfect. I got into Crestmore. |
| 00:25:04 |
Crestmore took you when Turner didn't? That's weird. |
| 00:25:07 |
I got into Turner, too. |
| 00:25:08 |
What? But didn't you tell your father that's where you want to go? |
| 00:25:11 |
I tried, Mack, but he's right. Crestmore is gonna open doors for me that Turner |
| 00:25:14 |
never could. I think it's a better choice. |
| 00:25:17 |
No, you don't. Look at you! You're miserable! |
| 00:25:19 |
I don't want to talk about it anymore, okay? I told you, I want to go to Crestmore. |
| 00:25:26 |
This college waiting game sucks, although it does provide the unexpected benefit |
| 00:25:31 |
of taking my mind off of every other aspect of my life. |
| 00:25:34 |
I know the feeling. Well, I did know the feeling. |
| 00:25:36 |
Or, at least, kind of knew the feeling. |
| 00:25:38 |
Wait, you heard from BFAC? |
| 00:25:39 |
Um, no. |
| 00:25:41 |
When do you send in your portfolio? |
| 00:25:42 |
See, the thing is, Daria, after much thought and consideration, I decided not to |
| 00:25:46 |
bother. I don't need college to be an artist. |
| 00:25:48 |
You what? |
| 00:25:49 |
It's not completely my choice. I got rejected by Lawndale State and State University. |
| 00:25:53 |
Oh, sorry. But, you said yourself their art teachers couldn't even draw Spunky. |
| 00:25:58 |
Exactly, and if college is about placing your fate in the hands of such |
| 00:26:02 |
untalented dopes, it just seems like a colossal waste of time. Besides, you know |
| 00:26:05 |
me, I gotta be footloose. |
| 00:26:07 |
The phrase you're looking for is screw loose. You can't let two rejections from |
| 00:26:11 |
places you don't even want to go make you afraid to try again. |
| 00:26:14 |
You know, Daria, not everyone goes to college. In fact, get past the |
| 00:26:18 |
Sloane-esque snobbery, and you'll realize there are a lot of really successful |
| 00:26:22 |
people with mere high school diplomas, or no diplomas at all. |
| 00:26:25 |
I'm not saying everyone has to go to college. I'm saying old footloose Jane Lane |
| 00:26:29 |
doesn't know all there is to know yet about art or anything else, and may be |
| 00:26:33 |
making an ill-advised decision to end her education based on temporary, if |
| 00:26:37 |
admittedly justified, disappointment. |
| 00:26:39 |
Daria, you're so predictable. I knew you were going to try to talk me out of this. |
| 00:26:43 |
Is that why you brought it up? |
| 00:26:45 |
Look, Dr. Freud, I appreciate your concern and all, but our 45 minutes are up. |
| 00:26:49 |
See you later. |
| 00:26:51 |
"Sloane-esque snobbery?" |
| 00:26:58 |
"Welcome to Raft." Great, one down. |
| 00:27:06 |
"Thank you for your interest in Bromwell... record number of qualified applicants..." |
| 00:27:11 |
Waiting list! Well, I guess that's settled. |
| 00:27:15 |
Daria, is everything all right? |
| 00:27:16 |
I got into Raft. |
| 00:27:18 |
You did? Congratulations! |
| 00:27:20 |
Don't put on your party hat just yet. I've been wait-listed at Bromwell. |
| 00:27:25 |
Oh. Daria, I'm sorry. Although Bromwell's still not out of the question. |
| 00:27:31 |
You're right. The entire incoming class could still be stricken with a crippling |
| 00:27:35 |
disease, moving me up a couple of notches on the waiting list. |
| 00:27:38 |
Honey, I know you're disappointed, but Raft is a great university, and it's |
| 00:27:43 |
smaller the Bromwell so you'll probably get more individual attention. |
| 00:27:46 |
Says the woman who thinks Bromwell is a magic carpet ride to success. Don't |
| 00:27:50 |
patronize me. |
| 00:27:52 |
Don't patronize me, Daria. I haven't changed my opinion of Bromwell, but I |
| 00:27:56 |
haven't changed my opinion of Raft, either. It's a wonderful school. |
| 00:28:00 |
It's just not the wonderful school. |
| 00:28:05 |
One Mai Tai. |
| 00:28:09 |
Anthony? |
| 00:28:09 |
Timothy, forgive me if my actions are presumptuous, but I cannot stand idly by |
| 00:28:14 |
when a colleague and friend teeters on the precipice of unimaginable misery. |
| 00:28:18 |
Oh, really? It's very refreshing. The citrus adds a tang... |
| 00:28:22 |
I'm talking about your espousal to the she-devil who walks among us! |
| 00:28:27 |
Umm... huh? |
| 00:28:28 |
You... Barch... Engaged! |
| 00:28:31 |
Eep! You sent me the card! But, how did you know? |
| 00:28:34 |
What'll it be, bub? |
| 00:28:35 |
I'll have the same, whatever it is. |
| 00:28:38 |
We're keeping our engagement a secret because of |
| 00:28:40 |
Ms. Li's rule about faculty fraternization. |
| 00:28:42 |
Timothy, I cannot be silent! I'm going to help you, help you be strong, help you |
| 00:28:47 |
stand up for yourself, help you take back the night! |
| 00:28:50 |
You'd do that for me? Oh, Anthony, I felt so scared, so alone. You're my best |
| 00:28:57 |
friend in the whole world. |
| 00:28:59 |
Now, now, Timothy, there's no need for that. You'd do the same for me. Oh, God, |
| 00:29:04 |
I'm getting dewy-eyed. |
| 00:29:17 |
Hello? |
| 00:29:17 |
Hey, Daria. |
| 00:29:18 |
Hi. |
| 00:29:19 |
What's the matter? |
| 00:29:19 |
I can't do a thing with my hair. Oh, and I've been wait-listed at Bromwell. |
| 00:29:24 |
Wait-listed? Nobody gets in from the wait-list. |
| 00:29:26 |
Stop being so diplomatic, would you? |
| 00:29:28 |
God, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to blurt that out. I'm just shocked. |
| 00:29:31 |
I did get accepted to Raft. |
| 00:29:33 |
I can't believe it. I was sure you'd get in. |
| 00:29:35 |
Did I mention that I was accepted at Raft? |
| 00:29:37 |
Yeah. I mean, that's good. |
| 00:29:39 |
Try to control your enthusiasm. |
| 00:29:41 |
Hmm, what about you? You hear anything? You got into Bromwell. |
| 00:29:46 |
That's sort of why I was calling. |
| 00:29:48 |
Well, surprise of surprises. A Sloane at Bromwell. |
| 00:29:51 |
Hey, come on, Daria. It wasn't a sure thing. |
| 00:29:53 |
Your uncle built them a wing. The only thing that might have kept you out of Bromwell |
| 00:29:58 |
is a murder conviction, and even then, only if you'd killed the Dean of Students. |
| 00:30:02 |
Hey, it's not my fault you had a shaky interview. |
| 00:30:04 |
Yes, well, nothing like dropping a few ancestor anecdotes to convince them of |
| 00:30:09 |
your qualifications. I got into Raft without any interview at all. |
| 00:30:13 |
I'm not gonna touch that one. |
| 00:30:14 |
What are you saying? I got in because they didn't meet me? Screw you! |
| 00:30:20 |
Quinn, I'm so glad you wanted to see A Kiss Before Heaven. I can't help myself; |
| 00:30:24 |
I'm a sucker for those tear-jerkers. |
| 00:30:26 |
Are you kidding? I love hospital room movies. And I hate seeing them with guys. |
| 00:30:31 |
They always get mad because nothing blows up. |
| 00:30:43 |
Daria, can we finish our conversation? |
| 00:30:46 |
Tom got into Bromwell. So you see, they're not rejecting everyone. |
| 00:30:50 |
Oh, well, some people have a certain... edge over the rest of us. |
| 00:30:55 |
You don't say. Look, I didn't mean to snap at you, but you're the one who told |
| 00:31:00 |
me about the advantages of a Bromwell education. |
| 00:31:03 |
That doesn't mean Raft... |
| 00:31:05 |
I didn't get into the school that I wanted, and you wanted for me. What am I |
| 00:31:08 |
supposed to think about my prospects? |
| 00:31:10 |
Your prospects? Daria, you'll be going to your second choice college, not |
| 00:31:14 |
prison. Look at me: I went to Middleton. It's not half the school that Raft is. |
| 00:31:20 |
What? |
| 00:31:20 |
Middleton's not half the school that Raft is, as you know damned well. I applied |
| 00:31:25 |
to college during the height of the baby boom. Competition was so fierce I got |
| 00:31:29 |
rejected from my first and second choices. And, see, I lived to tell about it. |
| 00:31:34 |
Hmm. |
| 00:31:34 |
I made the most of the education I did get, and so will you. Raft is an |
| 00:31:38 |
excellent school. You should be very proud. I know I am. |
| 00:31:43 |
Um, Dad seems to think Middleton's hot stuff. |
| 00:31:46 |
Your father needs to maintain certain illusions about his youth in order to |
| 00:31:50 |
function. It's... cute. |
| 00:31:53 |
I hope I don't end up the same way. |
| 00:31:55 |
Daria, you're destined for great things no matter where you go to school. I know it. |
| 00:32:01 |
Hmmm. All right, then. I suppose I can stop worrying about getting into college |
| 00:32:05 |
and start worrying about this disgusting elitism I have managed to develop |
| 00:32:09 |
during the process. |
| 00:32:10 |
Good. That'll keep you from worrying about what kind of weirdo you'll get for a roommate. |
| 00:32:16 |
Quinn, didn't you love that movie? It was so sad when Eleanor died. |
| 00:32:21 |
Um, Eleanor didn't die. Her sister Eileen did. |
| 00:32:24 |
Oh, right. Eileen. What should we do now? Wanna to go clubbing? |
| 00:32:28 |
Um, thanks, but I'm still in high school. You know, underaged. |
| 00:32:33 |
Oh, yeah. That sucks. |
| 00:32:34 |
Well, look, it's so nice out, let's just pick up some wine and hang out in the park. |
| 00:32:38 |
Umm, Lindy, are you sure you want more to drink? It's getting kind of late. |
| 00:32:42 |
That's what the morning's for. Sleep. Now, where is my car? |
| 00:32:45 |
Lindy, maybe you shouldn't drive. Come on, I'll call us both a cab. |
| 00:32:49 |
Well, well, if it isn't Miss Morgendorffer the Younger. |
| 00:32:52 |
And who is your comely companion? |
| 00:32:56 |
Upchuck, don't get any ideas or anything, but I need a ride home. |
| 00:32:59 |
No, you don't. |
| 00:33:00 |
Do my ears deceive me? A delectable damsel in distress reaching out to Senõr |
| 00:33:04 |
Suavicito in her hour of need? |
| 00:33:07 |
Lindy, it's no big deal, he just lives around the corner from me, that's all. |
| 00:33:11 |
In fact, why don't you come, too? We can pick up your car tomorrow. Do you mind |
| 00:33:14 |
driving my friend home, Upchuck? |
| 00:33:17 |
Quinn, the night is so young. I think I'm gonna hit a couple of clubs after all. |
| 00:33:21 |
See you tomorrow. |
| 00:33:22 |
Lindy, come on, we'll drive you to the clubs! Lindy! |
| 00:33:25 |
I don't understand the charade about being neighbors, my lissome enchantress, |
| 00:33:29 |
but it concerns me not. Come, allow me to escort you to my... chariot. |
| 00:33:35 |
Get away from me, you creep. Hello, Cabs 'n Stuff? |
| 00:33:43 |
Hello? |
| 00:33:43 |
That crack I made was stupid and completely out of line. |
| 00:33:46 |
Thank you for the bulletin, but I already knew that. |
| 00:33:48 |
Forgive me? |
| 00:33:49 |
What's in it for me? |
| 00:33:51 |
Let's say, for the sake of argument, that my family connections at Bromwell did |
| 00:33:54 |
help me get in. I'm sure that my parents would be happy to write a letter of |
| 00:33:58 |
recommendation for you. What do you say? |
| 00:33:59 |
Yes, Virginia, there really is such a thing as noblesse oblige. Thanks, but I'll |
| 00:34:04 |
pass. I'd rather get in on my own merits, and besides, I think I'm gonna like |
| 00:34:08 |
Raft just fine. |
| 00:34:10 |
You sure? |
| 00:34:10 |
Yeah, but thanks. |
| 00:34:15 |
Your eight o'clock is here. |
| 00:34:17 |
Send him in. |
| 00:34:18 |
Come in, Mack. Have a seat, and congratulations about Vance. |
| 00:34:21 |
Thank you. Thanks for squeezing me in before school. |
| 00:34:24 |
No problem, no problem. You said on the phone you wanted to talk about Jodie? |
| 00:34:28 |
Yeah. |
| 00:34:29 |
You're not gonna ask me for her hand in marriage, are you? Because I'm too young |
| 00:34:32 |
to be a grandfather, Mack, you understand? |
| 00:34:34 |
Grandfather? Ummm, no, Mr. Landon, it's nothing like that. |
| 00:34:37 |
Thank you, God! I mean... of course not. So, how can I help you? |
| 00:34:42 |
I hope you don't think I'm out of line, but Jodie's been acting really unhappy |
| 00:34:45 |
lately, and I think it's because of Crestmore. |
| 00:34:47 |
Impossible! We had a long talk about it and she's really looking forward to going. |
| 00:34:51 |
With all due respect, sir, I don't believe that's true. I think she really needs |
| 00:34:54 |
a different kind of environment. Like Turner. |
| 00:34:57 |
How is she gonna go to Turner? She didn't even apply. |
| 00:35:00 |
Look, Michael, if Jodie passes on Crestmore, she'll end up regretting it for the |
| 00:35:04 |
rest of her life. |
| 00:35:05 |
Anyway, if she really wanted to go to Turner, she'd have applied there. |
| 00:35:09 |
She did. She got in. |
| 00:35:10 |
What? |
| 00:35:11 |
She got in. She's afraid to tell you. |
| 00:35:15 |
Well, that was nice of Tom to offer to get his folks to write to Bromwell. |
| 00:35:18 |
It's just that the whole thing smacks of some crappy romance novel where the |
| 00:35:23 |
troubled young viscount decides the lowly stable girl is good enough for him |
| 00:35:27 |
after all. |
| 00:35:27 |
I always saw you as more of a scullery maid. |
| 00:35:29 |
And why should the Sloane's seal of approval |
| 00:35:32 |
matter more to Bromwell than my transcripts? |
| 00:35:34 |
"Dear Dean Skippy, please admit Daria. She's a fine young woman, even if she |
| 00:35:38 |
isn't one of us." |
| 00:35:39 |
Exactly. Besides, if they write a recommendation, it'll just make it that much |
| 00:35:43 |
worse when I do get that ultimate rejection. |
| 00:35:45 |
You are very wise for a humble laundress, and generous, too. |
| 00:35:49 |
How come you bought the pizza? |
| 00:35:50 |
To make you feel too guilty to storm off in a huff when I ask if you've sent |
| 00:35:54 |
your portfolio in to BFAC yet. |
| 00:35:56 |
Why bother? It's too late. |
| 00:35:58 |
Not for mid-year enrollment. |
| 00:35:59 |
Daria, I already told you. I'm just not the college type. |
| 00:36:03 |
Oooh, a cheeseless bell pepper pizza! And you don't even like cheeseless. |
| 00:36:08 |
Hey! Nothing but the best for my babe! |
| 00:36:10 |
I just love bell peppers. You can almost hear them ringing. |
| 00:36:14 |
Hey, Brit, even if you're gone away to Great Prairie State next year, you'll |
| 00:36:18 |
still be my babe, right? I mean, no matter where I go? Right? |
| 00:36:22 |
Um, sure. Why do you ask? |
| 00:36:24 |
I just wanted to see how deep is your love, babe. Hey, and speaking of deep, |
| 00:36:28 |
watch this! I'm a clown, I'm a clown, I'm a... Funny, huh babe? |
| 00:36:37 |
I couldn't paint anything decent with that application hanging over my head, |
| 00:36:40 |
anyway. Believe me, that portfolio would never have gotten me into BFAC. |
| 00:36:44 |
Que ironico, the minute the pressure was off, I started doing some really |
| 00:36:47 |
interesting stuff again. |
| 00:36:48 |
So it's the old "reject them before they reject me." |
| 00:36:52 |
Yeah, the same thing you're doing with Bromwell. |
| 00:36:53 |
I was already rejected by Bromwell. |
| 00:36:56 |
So was I. By State U and Lawndale State. |
| 00:36:58 |
But you told me you don't care what their sucky art departments thought of your work. |
| 00:37:03 |
Really. They're so sucky they didn't even ask to see it. |
| 00:37:05 |
What? |
| 00:37:06 |
They didn't ask to see any of my stuff, so I didn't send any. |
| 00:37:09 |
Wait. You get rejected by schools that don't care if you have artistic talent, |
| 00:37:13 |
but the one that does care, you decide not to go for? |
| 00:37:16 |
For the same reason you're not gonna let the Sloanes write a letter that might |
| 00:37:19 |
get you into Bromwell, even though you wouldn't have to lift a finger. Rejection |
| 00:37:22 |
sucks. You said so yourself. |
| 00:37:25 |
I'll make you a deal. If I prostrate myself before the Sloanes and ask them for |
| 00:37:30 |
that letter, will you finish your portfolio and send it to BFAC? |
| 00:37:35 |
God, Daria! You must really think I have a shot. |
| 00:37:38 |
You drive a hard bargain, Morgendorffer, but you've got yourself a deal. |
| 00:37:47 |
Hello? |
| 00:37:48 |
Hey. You know that letter we talked about? |
| 00:37:51 |
Well, I guess it couldn't hurt. |
| 00:37:53 |
Great. |
| 00:37:53 |
I'll ask my parents right now. I'm sure they do this kind of things all the time. |
| 00:37:56 |
Oh, good. Then they can just send out the form letter. |
| 00:37:59 |
The good form letter. Let me catch them before they go out. Call me later? |
| 00:38:03 |
Sure. Um, thanks. |
| 00:38:06 |
Damn. |
| 00:38:10 |
Yo, Trent! You're just in time to run me down to Package-Air. I want to get my |
| 00:38:13 |
portfolio off to BFAC. |
| 00:38:15 |
Whoa. I thought you weren't going to college. |
| 00:38:18 |
I changed my mind, although first, I kind of have to get them to take me. |
| 00:38:21 |
What about focusing on your art? |
| 00:38:23 |
See, I can do that at Boston Fine Arts College. That's why they put in the word |
| 00:38:27 |
"arts." Come on, let's go. |
| 00:38:29 |
I don't know. I have to get used to this whole selling out thing first. |
| 00:38:33 |
Trent, I'm not selling out. I'm attempting to acquire the skills and knowledge |
| 00:38:37 |
that will allow me to sell out. Now, are you gonna give me a ride, or do I have |
| 00:38:40 |
to throw fear into the hearts of pedestrians by myself? |
| 00:38:45 |
Huh. See you later. |
| 00:38:48 |
Yeah... later. |
| 00:38:53 |
Hi, Jodie. What are you doing? |
| 00:38:55 |
Do you need me something? I'll get up. |
| 00:38:57 |
We just want to talk to you. About Mack. |
| 00:38:59 |
What about him? |
| 00:39:00 |
He came to see me at my office. |
| 00:39:02 |
What? Without telling me? Why? |
| 00:39:04 |
He's got quite an imagination. He seems to think you want to go to Turner so |
| 00:39:07 |
much you applied there behind our backs. |
| 00:39:12 |
"Curse Begone. For the reversal and elimination of curses, spells and |
| 00:39:15 |
incantations. No animals were harmed to make this product, other than the ones |
| 00:39:19 |
we sacrificed." Boy, I hope this stuff works, or Sandi will never talk to me |
| 00:39:23 |
again. Actually, she'll never talk to anyone again. That's not funny, Stacy! |
| 00:39:34 |
Sandi, I'm so sorry it took me so long, but I wanted to make sure the ice in |
| 00:39:37 |
your soda was crushed enough because I know how you hate big or even medium |
| 00:39:40 |
chunks of ice. You know, my Mom says soda rots your teeth, but if it were really |
| 00:39:44 |
true, wouldn't you see a lot more people in high school with dentures or no |
| 00:39:46 |
teeth at all, just tiny little stubs? |
| 00:39:48 |
Stacy. Eww... |
| 00:39:50 |
Sorry. So, how are the sodas? I mean, not that they shouldn't be okay. |
| 00:39:56 |
Ewww. What's in this? |
| 00:39:59 |
Oh, no! I must have given you the one with the potion. |
| 00:40:06 |
Oh, Sandi, I am so sorry. See, when I was blowing out my birthday candles, I |
| 00:40:10 |
accidentally wished you'd be, well, quiet, and then you lost your voice and I |
| 00:40:13 |
was afraid to tell you so I got this curse undoer stuff over the Internet and I |
| 00:40:16 |
guess I used too much because I really wanted you to be cured, and then Tiffany |
| 00:40:20 |
got it by mistake and I am so sorry! |
| 00:40:25 |
No, Sandi, I swear! I didn't try to kill you! See, it's only Cayenne pepper, |
| 00:40:30 |
cooking oil, and some big long name. Sandi, you know I would never hurt anybody, |
| 00:40:34 |
especially not you. I mean, I really, really care about people. Please, I'll do |
| 00:40:38 |
anything to make it up to you! Just tell me what to do. |
| 00:40:43 |
Now, here is my kind of credit card bill. No Cashman's, no Doo Dads, just a |
| 00:40:47 |
single two-hundred dollar charge to Bulk Cat Food dot com. Cat food? This isn't |
| 00:40:53 |
our address... this isn't my name! Damn idiot mailman! |
| 00:40:56 |
Jake, settle down! Hmmm, from Bromwell. Daria, look what just came in. |
| 00:41:02 |
Either that's a rejection, or they printed the registration forms on microfilm. |
| 00:41:06 |
Now, don't jump to any conclusions. |
| 00:41:10 |
Well, the freshman class is full. I won't be going to Bromwell. |
| 00:41:14 |
Oh, honey. |
| 00:41:15 |
That sucks, Daria! Passing on a smart kid like you! They're idiots! |
| 00:41:19 |
You know what? I'm not even sorry. |
| 00:41:21 |
You have nothing to be sorry about. |
| 00:41:23 |
Stuffy arrogant... "Oh, look at us, we're Bromwell!" But listen, Middleton is a |
| 00:41:30 |
very good school. Well, a pretty good school. Well, anyway it was good enough |
| 00:41:35 |
for your mother and me. |
| 00:41:36 |
Jake... |
| 00:41:37 |
Um, Dad... about Middleton... I didn't apply there. |
| 00:41:40 |
You didn't? So... you're going ahead with this crazy notion about military school? |
| 00:41:44 |
Military school? |
| 00:41:46 |
Jake! What are you talking about? Daria is going to Raft. |
| 00:41:49 |
Raft? You mean, no barracks? No buzzcut? No inspection time? Latrine duty? |
| 00:41:54 |
Training marches at 0600 hours? |
| 00:41:56 |
Hmmm, if Raft has those things, it was pretty crafty of the brochure just to |
| 00:42:01 |
show kids on the quad hanging out and throwing frisbees. |
| 00:42:04 |
Oh, thank God! My daughter, going to college instead of a military academy. Hey, |
| 00:42:09 |
Raft is a damned good school. Daria, you won't be sorry you did this. There'll |
| 00:42:14 |
always be time for the army later! |
| 00:42:16 |
You'll understand when I don't invite my roommate home for Thanksgiving, right? |
| 00:42:22 |
How long is the wait for two? |
| 00:42:23 |
Table twenty-one is ready. |
| 00:42:24 |
I'll seat you right now. |
| 00:42:27 |
I'm sorry. Is there a problem here? |
| 00:42:29 |
That hostess seated those people who just came in, |
| 00:42:31 |
and we've been waiting forty minutes. |
| 00:42:33 |
My apologies. Let me see what I can do, and dessert's on me. |
| 00:42:47 |
Folks, we've been holding a table for six we can split up. Please, come with me |
| 00:42:50 |
and I'll get you settled right away. Then the three of us are gonna have a |
| 00:42:54 |
little talk. |
| 00:42:56 |
What's that about? |
| 00:42:57 |
Oh, Quinn, I'd never thought he'd find it there. |
| 00:42:59 |
Find what? |
| 00:43:00 |
My screwdriver. |
| 00:43:01 |
Lindy! You've been drinking?! |
| 00:43:02 |
Just a little hair of the dog. I wouldn't have done it except I'm really hung over. |
| 00:43:06 |
But we're at work! |
| 00:43:07 |
I know. Damn, damn, damn! Quinn, listen to me. Normally, I would never, ever ask |
| 00:43:12 |
you to do something like this, but I'm in college, I'm broke, I really need this |
| 00:43:16 |
job. Maybe if we said we think one of the bus boys left it there or something? |
| 00:43:19 |
But then, won't they get in trouble? |
| 00:43:21 |
Ladies, Shawna's gonna man your post for a while. Come with me. |
| 00:43:29 |
Okay, I want to know whose cup this is. Quinn? |
| 00:43:33 |
Umm, it's not mine. |
| 00:43:35 |
We don't know whose it is. |
| 00:43:36 |
Then explain to me why this smudge here matches your lipstick. |
| 00:43:39 |
That could be anybody's lipstick! |
| 00:43:40 |
Not really. |
| 00:43:41 |
For instance, Quinn asked me if she could try my lipstick... not that I'm saying |
| 00:43:44 |
it's hers, of course... |
| 00:43:45 |
Oh, Lindy... |
| 00:43:48 |
Come on, Lindy. |
| 00:43:49 |
Please, Michael, I've never done anything like this before, I swear. I don't |
| 00:43:53 |
even like to drink. It's just I have this migraine... |
| 00:43:55 |
I'm gonna have to let you go. |
| 00:44:02 |
Damn! You know what I've just realized? |
| 00:44:03 |
The phrase "chicken fingers" is misleading ? |
| 00:44:05 |
Besides that. We forgot to check out the pizza in Newtown. |
| 00:44:08 |
Oh. Well, I guess you'll just have to send mine Package-Air to Boston. |
| 00:44:12 |
Won't that be a little messy? Oh, Daria! No! |
| 00:44:16 |
Yep. It's official. I didn't get into Bromwell. |
| 00:44:19 |
I'm really sorry. And after my parents wrote such a glowing recommendation, too. |
| 00:44:23 |
Shocking, isn't it? I'm such a loser, even a nod from the Sloanes couldn't help me. |
| 00:44:27 |
That's not what I meant. |
| 00:44:28 |
Good. Because I'm not a loser, and even if I didn't go to the right prep school, |
| 00:44:33 |
or pull the right strings, or donate a wing... |
| 00:44:35 |
It was my uncle! |
| 00:44:37 |
Listen. You're a smart guy and a good student. I'm sure you deserve to get into |
| 00:44:42 |
Bromwell, and I wish you every success there. |
| 00:44:44 |
Well, that's a nice thing to say, even if that Daria voice of yours makes it |
| 00:44:48 |
sound like a kiss off... wait... |
| 00:44:50 |
I think we should break up. |
| 00:44:51 |
What? When did you decide this? |
| 00:44:53 |
Just now. |
| 00:44:54 |
Because I got into Bromwell and you didn't? That's not fair, Daria. |
| 00:44:57 |
It's got nothing to do with Bromwell. |
| 00:44:59 |
Well, if it's not about Bromwell, then what? Why? |
| 00:45:03 |
Because you're going one place and I'm going another. |
| 00:45:05 |
So what? We won't be that far away. |
| 00:45:07 |
I don't mean physically. I mean you're from one place and I'm from another, and |
| 00:45:11 |
college is going to make it even more obvious. |
| 00:45:14 |
I don't believe that. |
| 00:45:15 |
Tom... we have little enough in common as it is. Now we won't see each other for |
| 00:45:19 |
months at a time, and every time we do, it'll be more difficult to pick up where |
| 00:45:23 |
we left off. |
| 00:45:24 |
Not if we work at it. |
| 00:45:25 |
Why should we work at it when we are already getting bored? |
| 00:45:27 |
Who's bored? I'm not bored. |
| 00:45:29 |
Really? Or are you just upset that I admitted it first? |
| 00:45:34 |
You'll get over it. We both will. |
| 00:45:37 |
Hey, kids! What's new? |
| 00:45:40 |
Oops, sorry. Wrong table. |
| 00:45:52 |
Hi. |
| 00:45:53 |
Hmm. |
| 00:45:54 |
TV's off. |
| 00:45:55 |
Yeah. Want something? |
| 00:45:58 |
No. Just... if you had a friend and you knew she had a problem but she didn't, |
| 00:46:02 |
would you tell her? |
| 00:46:04 |
Huh? |
| 00:46:04 |
This girl I was working with... I think she has a drinking problem. If I don't |
| 00:46:08 |
say anything, I'm afraid she'll get an accident or something, but if I do say |
| 00:46:12 |
something, she'll probably never speak to me again. Not that she is now. |
| 00:46:15 |
I don't really feel qualified to give any advice on interpersonal relationships today. |
| 00:46:20 |
Why not? |
| 00:46:21 |
I just broke up with my boyfriend. It's kind of a first for me. So's this |
| 00:46:25 |
feeling in my stomach like it's been through a paper shedder. |
| 00:46:28 |
You broke up with Tom? |
| 00:46:29 |
You sound almost surprised as I was. |
| 00:46:31 |
Why? |
| 00:46:32 |
Because I felt we'd come to the end of our relationship, for a bunch of reasons, |
| 00:46:36 |
and we should both move on. |
| 00:46:38 |
So you said that to him, just like that? |
| 00:46:40 |
For some reason, I continue to opt for honesty, despite mounting evidence that |
| 00:46:44 |
it's inexorably transforming me into an old woman alone in a one room apartment |
| 00:46:49 |
filled with thirty year old newspapers and cats. |
| 00:46:51 |
Oh, Daria, that's not gonna happen to you. I was at a college party. I know what |
| 00:46:56 |
goes on there. People are smart and nice. |
| 00:46:58 |
So it's the opposite of high school? |
| 00:46:59 |
You're gonna have friends and everything. I know it sounds hard to believe. |
| 00:47:03 |
Gee, thanks. But, um, thanks. |
| 00:47:06 |
You were right to be honest. That's what I'm gonna do. |
| 00:47:08 |
Good. You can help me feed the cats. |
| 00:47:14 |
Daria, your face at the pizza place. Your face now... did that bastard dump you? |
| 00:47:19 |
I was always afraid he'd do that! |
| 00:47:21 |
No, I dumped him. |
| 00:47:23 |
You dumped... you're the bastard? Whoa. |
| 00:47:26 |
Yes, I'm the bastard, and the bastard is hurting like hell. |
| 00:47:38 |
Oh, hi. I didn't think I'd ever see you again. |
| 00:47:41 |
Why not? We're friends, right? |
| 00:47:43 |
I mean, that was a really crappy thing I said about you borrowing my lipstick. I |
| 00:47:47 |
can't believe I did it. I was desperate. |
| 00:47:49 |
I know. |
| 00:47:50 |
It was, like, the worst thing I've ever done in my life, and I'm really sorry. |
| 00:47:54 |
Lindy, I know I'm only in high school and I'm not really used to be around |
| 00:47:57 |
people who drink except for my father, but that's only when he's really mad and |
| 00:48:00 |
talking about military school and even then... and okay, my mother had a few too |
| 00:48:04 |
many at this wedding, but if you knew my aunt Rita, and I think you have a |
| 00:48:07 |
drinking problem. |
| 00:48:10 |
All right, I hurt you, you hurt me, fair enough. |
| 00:48:13 |
I'm not trying to hurt you, Lindy. You really need to think about your drinking. |
| 00:48:17 |
Quinn, I'm in college. Everybody drinks. If I had a problem, it would be |
| 00:48:21 |
affecting my schoolwork or personal life, wouldn't it? |
| 00:48:23 |
But you got fired because of it! |
| 00:48:25 |
I got fired because Michael's a jerk. And guess what? I already found another job. |
| 00:48:29 |
But you just said that what happened in Michael's office was the worst thing you |
| 00:48:32 |
ever did in your life. Doesn't that mean it's affecting you? |
| 00:48:35 |
That was out of panic, and now with your nasty little accusations, you've gotten |
| 00:48:39 |
me back for. Which is what I guess you came over in the first place. So, we're |
| 00:48:42 |
even, okay? So goodbye. |
| 00:48:44 |
Goodbye? |
| 00:48:45 |
I've got a paper due tomorrow and I've got a lot of writing left to go. You |
| 00:48:48 |
noticed I said writing, not drinking. You'll noticed I've a got a book opened, |
| 00:48:51 |
not a bottle And now the door's open, too. |
| 00:49:10 |
Hello? |
| 00:49:20 |
All right! Last day of school. No more classes. |
| 00:49:22 |
Or homework! |
| 00:49:23 |
Or those things with the pages! |
| 00:49:25 |
Books? |
| 00:49:25 |
Yeah, that's it. |
| 00:49:27 |
I want to talk to you. Alone. |
| 00:49:30 |
Okay. Obviously, you found out that I went to see your father. |
| 00:49:33 |
And told him what I confided in you. |
| 00:49:35 |
Look, I was just trying to help. |
| 00:49:36 |
Yeah? Well, as a result of your butting in... I'm going to Turner! I'm going to Turner! |
| 00:49:41 |
You are? That's great! |
| 00:49:43 |
My parents said that if I was so upset about Crestmore that I applied to Turner |
| 00:49:46 |
behind their backs, they had to respect my feelings. They told me I'd earned the |
| 00:49:49 |
right to be treated like an adult. |
| 00:49:51 |
I knew you'd work it out. |
| 00:49:52 |
I wouldn't have worked it out without you. Did I ever tell you how lucky I am to |
| 00:49:56 |
have you? |
| 00:49:58 |
Jodie! Mack! Have you seen Mr. O'Neill? |
| 00:50:01 |
Nope, haven't seen him. |
| 00:50:02 |
Oh sure. All you males stick together! |
| 00:50:09 |
Kevvie, do you want to go to the place we have to go to get the cap and gown |
| 00:50:13 |
with me? |
| 00:50:13 |
Mmmm, nah! But, you go ahead. |
| 00:50:16 |
Why? Did you already get yours? |
| 00:50:18 |
Um, Brit... remember when you said you'd still be my babe, no matter where I |
| 00:50:22 |
went to school? |
| 00:50:23 |
Umm... I think so. |
| 00:50:25 |
But you will, right? |
| 00:50:26 |
Sure! Where are you going? |
| 00:50:28 |
Right here, babe! |
| 00:50:30 |
Huh? |
| 00:50:30 |
Right here. Lawndale High. See, um, my grades were so good, they want to see if |
| 00:50:36 |
I can do it again. |
| 00:50:37 |
Ohhh. Wait a minute... your grades aren't good... Kevvie, you flunked! |
| 00:50:43 |
No, no, no! I just, um, didn't pass. |
| 00:50:46 |
But, see, if I repeat this year, then my grades will be really good. |
| 00:50:49 |
Mr. O'Neill says I can go away to any college in the country! |
| 00:50:52 |
Really? |
| 00:50:53 |
Or did he say some college way out in the country? Anyway, we're still, like, |
| 00:50:57 |
boyfriend and girlfriend, right? |
| 00:50:59 |
Ummm, sure. |
| 00:51:04 |
Timothy, you've got to be firm. Now, repeat after me: "Barch, it'll be a cold |
| 00:51:09 |
day in hell before I kiss my common sense and will to live goodbye, and enter |
| 00:51:14 |
the bonds of unholy matrimony with such a shrew!" Now, you! |
| 00:51:20 |
Um, Janet, it'll be a chilly day in Hades... |
| 00:51:23 |
LOUDER! |
| 00:51:24 |
Uh, Janet... |
| 00:51:25 |
There you are. If I didn't know better, I'd swear you were hiding from me! |
| 00:51:29 |
Oh. Me? Hiding? |
| 00:51:32 |
Madam? Timothy has something he'd like to say to you! Don't you, Timothy? |
| 00:51:36 |
Well, what is it? And make it snappy, Skinny, we have to go pick our honeymoon |
| 00:51:40 |
cruise wear. |
| 00:51:41 |
Um, Janet, about the wedding, well, um, you see... |
| 00:51:45 |
There's not gonna be a wedding, so you can dig your talons into the flesh of |
| 00:51:49 |
some other prey! |
| 00:51:50 |
WHAT? |
| 00:51:50 |
You heard him. |
| 00:51:51 |
Uh, you see, Janet, It's not that you wouldn't make a very desirable life partner... |
| 00:51:56 |
All right then, Mr. Gigolo, you hear this: if there's no wedding, then that's |
| 00:52:01 |
it. It's over, buster. We will never play farmwife and National Geographic |
| 00:52:07 |
photographer again. |
| 00:52:09 |
Timothy? |
| 00:52:11 |
As you wish. |
| 00:52:12 |
Aargh! |
| 00:52:13 |
Congratulations! You stood up to her like a man! |
| 00:52:16 |
Exactly! |
| 00:52:18 |
Ow! My good eye! Aaaaaah! |
| 00:52:28 |
Stacy, of course Sandi didn't say anything about being mad at you. |
| 00:52:32 |
She can't talk, remember? |
| 00:52:36 |
Stacy, I've got to call you back. Um, hi, Lindy. Come in! How are you? |
| 00:52:41 |
I'm just fine, really great. Um, I forgot to give this to you when you came over |
| 00:52:45 |
the other day. |
| 00:52:47 |
Lindy! The mirror; it's beautiful! |
| 00:52:50 |
You really like it? |
| 00:52:51 |
I love it! Thank you! |
| 00:52:53 |
Um, listen, about our conversation. Maybe every now and then I do go a little |
| 00:52:58 |
overboard when I drink, but that doesn't mean I've got a problem. Believe me, I |
| 00:53:03 |
you'd had my mother, you know how the real problem looks like. |
| 00:53:05 |
Oh. |
| 00:53:06 |
You know how I'm sure I can handle it? Whenever I think I'm drinking too much, I |
| 00:53:09 |
stop for a week, just to prove to myself that I can. |
| 00:53:11 |
Really? |
| 00:53:12 |
Yeah. I do it all the time. So you see? |
| 00:53:15 |
Yeah, that's great, Lindy. |
| 00:53:17 |
Anyway, I'm glad you like the mirror. |
| 00:53:19 |
It's beautiful. |
| 00:53:21 |
Thanks. I'll see you around. |
| 00:53:23 |
Um, Lindy? Do you want to go to a movie or something? |
| 00:53:25 |
I can't today, but I'll give you a call, okay? |
| 00:53:28 |
Okay, sure. |
| 00:53:34 |
Hey. |
| 00:53:35 |
Wow, you're talking to a sellout like me? |
| 00:53:37 |
About that... |
| 00:53:38 |
Yes? |
| 00:53:39 |
I don't really think you're a sellout. |
| 00:53:42 |
Well, that's not exactly an apology, but you know what they say about beggars. |
| 00:53:45 |
That they only spend it on booze? |
| 00:53:48 |
Never mind. |
| 00:53:49 |
Um, Janey? |
| 00:53:50 |
Um, Trent? |
| 00:53:51 |
This college thing... I gave it... thought... and, um, I kind of understand if |
| 00:53:57 |
you want to go. |
| 00:53:58 |
What I don't get is why you were so against it in the first place. |
| 00:54:01 |
I guess I didn't want you to go because... well... you would be there... |
| 00:54:07 |
Admirable grasp of the situation. |
| 00:54:09 |
...and I would be here. |
| 00:54:10 |
Oh. You're worried about losing me? |
| 00:54:13 |
Well, the house gets kind of spooky at night. Maybe I should get a puppy. |
| 00:54:19 |
Hey, Trent, do you really think I'm gonna let you slack off being my brother |
| 00:54:22 |
just because of an address change? |
| 00:54:24 |
Hmm. |
| 00:54:25 |
Now, listen. My guess is Mom and Dad won't be back from the Azores until monsoon |
| 00:54:29 |
season's over. You want to represent the Lane family at my graduation? |
| 00:54:32 |
I didn't even go to my own graduation. |
| 00:54:35 |
So you did graduate. |
| 00:54:37 |
I'm pretty sure... |
| 00:54:44 |
Hmm. What's Tom doing out there? He looks unhappy about something. |
| 00:54:48 |
He's probably mad at those stuck-up Bromwell goons, too! |
| 00:54:50 |
Lousy, tea-drinking, pinky-raising... |
| 00:54:53 |
Jake! Tom got into Bromwell. Oh! |
| 00:55:02 |
Um, hello. |
| 00:55:03 |
Hey, Daria. |
| 00:55:04 |
I'm not getting into that car. |
| 00:55:05 |
That's how all this trouble started in the first place. |
| 00:55:08 |
Trouble? Is that how you think of our relationship? |
| 00:55:10 |
I'm just kidding. What's up? |
| 00:55:12 |
Oh, Jake! I think something bad is happening! And she's already had one |
| 00:55:16 |
disappointment. Oh, no! I was dreading this day! |
| 00:55:20 |
Sounds like I should do something! I think I'll go clean the attic! |
| 00:55:23 |
Jake! |
| 00:55:26 |
Um, I've been thinking a lot about why you said we should break up, and I don't |
| 00:55:29 |
disagree. I just wanted to know: you liked me for a while, right? |
| 00:55:33 |
Tom, come on. I still like you. You're a good guy. A little spoiled, a hair |
| 00:55:38 |
smug, a triffle egotistical... |
| 00:55:40 |
This isn't going quite the way I hoped. |
| 00:55:41 |
...but a smart, funny guy who's basically very caring and sensitive in the |
| 00:55:45 |
not-pukey way. I'm glad we went out. It was a really good experience. |
| 00:55:49 |
You mean that? |
| 00:55:50 |
Yeah, of course. What's the matter with you? |
| 00:55:53 |
Nothing. It's just... I really look up to you, and your opinion's important to me. |
| 00:55:57 |
You look up to me? Huh. |
| 00:55:59 |
Do you think next year I could call you from school, and we could compare notes |
| 00:56:02 |
on our lives in a completely nonromantic fashion? You know, like friends? |
| 00:56:06 |
Hmm, yeah. Yeah! That's a good idea. Call me. That'll be nice. |
| 00:56:11 |
OK. I'm starting to feel a little better. How about you? |
| 00:56:16 |
I've got one more bed of hot coals to walk through first. |
| 00:56:21 |
Daria! Hi! How was the last day of school? Do you want to lie down? |
| 00:56:25 |
I have an announcement to make. |
| 00:56:27 |
Oh, God, Daria! It'll be all right, I promise! |
| 00:56:30 |
I have broken up with my boyfriend. |
| 00:56:32 |
Yes, it hurts, but it was my idea, and despite the pain I feel, |
| 00:56:36 |
I remain convinced it is for the best. |
| 00:56:39 |
I am looking forward to summer, and, to my amazement, |
| 00:56:42 |
excited about college next year. |
| 00:56:44 |
Now I shall go to my room without taking questions. |
| 00:56:47 |
Ignore any muffled screams you may hear, especially if they're Quinn's. |
| 00:56:51 |
She and Tom broke up? Just like that? No clues, no warning signs? I'd better go |
| 00:56:55 |
talk to her! This could drive her back to military school! What should I say? |
| 00:56:59 |
Damn it, Helen! Where's our copy of Mr. Spock? |
| 00:57:02 |
Jake, your concern is very sweet, but I think she's going to be okay. |
| 00:57:08 |
Just tell me what I did to make you drag me to Jodie's graduation party? |
| 00:57:12 |
You need a break from the break-up. One more night with those whose stupidity |
| 00:57:16 |
has so tormented and entertained us, lo, these many years. A farewell to dopes! |
| 00:57:24 |
Andrea, my dark-eyed mistress of sweet, sweet pain. Are you, like me, finding |
| 00:57:28 |
this party a bit too... festive? Let us depart for a darker place, where we can |
| 00:57:34 |
explore the melancholia that always accompanies true, unbridled passion! |
| 00:57:38 |
You're hitting on me? |
| 00:57:40 |
Um... |
| 00:57:41 |
Okay. |
| 00:57:42 |
Really?! I mean, say no more, my raven-haired ravisher! |
| 00:57:48 |
Behold, Daria! The group dynamic you crave so much! |
| 00:57:51 |
I suppose pulling out a can of mace right now would be considered bad form. |
| 00:57:56 |
Hey, guys. Thanks for coming. |
| 00:57:57 |
No Tom tonight? |
| 00:57:58 |
Um, no Tom no more. |
| 00:58:00 |
What? He dumped both of you? I mean... |
| 00:58:03 |
Au contraire! Tom was the dumpee! |
| 00:58:05 |
Wow! |
| 00:58:06 |
Yes, I terminated the relationship so I could indulge my compulsive need to play |
| 00:58:11 |
the field. |
| 00:58:12 |
Hi, Daria! Hi, Jane! Where's Tom? |
| 00:58:15 |
Um, covert mission. |
| 00:58:16 |
Really? I didn't know he was religious. |
| 00:58:19 |
Hey, Daria! Where's that guy you know? |
| 00:58:21 |
He joined a mission! |
| 00:58:23 |
Really? He's going to Mars? |
| 00:58:27 |
So, once I paid off my credit card bill, I just quit. My friend was already |
| 00:58:30 |
gone, and I mean, who works in the summer? Puh-lease! |
| 00:58:34 |
You're so good with money, Quinn! |
| 00:58:36 |
Could you balance my checkbook? |
| 00:58:37 |
You've got fiscal smarts! |
| 00:58:39 |
Well, I see I'm the only one who still believes in arriving fashionably late. |
| 00:58:43 |
Sandi! You got your voice back! |
| 00:58:45 |
That's great, Sandi! |
| 00:58:47 |
Yeah... great... |
| 00:58:49 |
Stacy, you'll be happy to know I figured how you can almost make it up to me for |
| 00:58:54 |
the physical and emotional anguish you caused. |
| 00:58:56 |
You have? Oh, Sandi, thank you! Organize your Waif magazine inventory, ironing |
| 00:59:02 |
any and all wrinkled pages... take over babysitting your brothers all summer... |
| 00:59:06 |
clean your lipstick tubes... |
| 00:59:07 |
Whoa, Stacy... I pity you. |
| 00:59:10 |
Um, Sandi, I'm really, really sorry about what happened and all, but this seems |
| 00:59:14 |
kind of... unfair. I mean, we don't know if I really made you lose your voice, right? |
| 00:59:19 |
Are you saying you don't care if you jeopardize your status in the Fashion Club? |
| 00:59:24 |
Sandi, if this is what it'll take to keep me in the Fashion Club, maybe I'm |
| 00:59:28 |
better off taking a sabbatical like Quinn. |
| 00:59:30 |
Um... fine. But you're missing out, because Quinn is coming back. Right, Quinn? |
| 00:59:36 |
Um, actually, Sandi, the time off was a nice change of pace. I'm thinking of |
| 00:59:41 |
extending my sabbatical. |
| 00:59:42 |
What? |
| 00:59:43 |
Huh. I think I'll take a sabbatical, too. |
| 00:59:49 |
Well, that is certainly an amusing coincidence, because tonight I was going to |
| 00:59:55 |
announce my sabbatical from the Fashion Club. Yes, I find that your precious |
| 00:59:59 |
club no longer serves my needs as a multi-faceted young woman of today. It's |
| 01:00:04 |
just too confining. |
| 01:00:05 |
Gosh! Does this mean there isn't any more Fashion Club? |
| 01:00:09 |
I guess it's time to move on. |
| 01:00:11 |
It's like the end of an era. |
| 01:00:13 |
I'm gonna miss it. |
| 01:00:14 |
Me, too. |
| 01:00:20 |
You want to come over tomorrow and discuss what we'll do with all our new free time? |
| 01:00:25 |
That's a great idea, Sandi! |
| 01:00:26 |
I'll bring some magazines to look at. |
| 01:00:28 |
I can't wait to brainstorm. |
| 01:00:31 |
Then it's a date. |
| 01:00:35 |
He said he looked up to you? |
| 01:00:36 |
Isn't that weird? Flattering, but weird. |
| 01:00:39 |
Well, I kind of take what you say seriously. |
| 01:00:42 |
That's why, after your constant haranguing and brow-beating, I went ahead and |
| 01:00:46 |
sent my portfolio to BFAC... and got in. |
| 01:00:49 |
Jane Lane! What did you say? |
| 01:00:52 |
You. Me. College. Same town. Be ready to have your ass dragged to more parties. |
| 01:00:56 |
I knew you could do it. I knew it! |
| 01:00:59 |
Why the hell didn't you tell me? |
| 01:01:00 |
I just found out today. Besides, you know what a drama queen I am. So, what do |
| 01:01:04 |
you say? Make a pledge right now to go up there and get separate boyfriends? |
| 01:01:09 |
Thanks for talking me into applying. |
| 01:01:11 |
Thanks for helping me get through high school. |
| 01:01:14 |
Me at BFAC, you at Raft. You think it's true that things happen for a reason? |
| 01:01:19 |
Naah! |
| 01:01:21 |
... for today we leave the days of our youth behind and begin our journey into |
| 01:01:24 |
adulthood. Many years from now, I'm sure we will look back on our days at |
| 01:01:28 |
Lawndale High with a great fondness, for what once was, and will never be again. |
| 01:01:33 |
That last part sounded good. |
| 01:01:35 |
Thank you. |
| 01:01:39 |
Thank you, Jodie Landon, valedictorian of the graduating class of Laaawndale |
| 01:01:43 |
High. And remember, parents, your child doesn't have to be a current student for |
| 01:01:47 |
us to accept your generous donations. And now, people, and now... and now, |
| 01:01:52 |
awards time! We'll do the sports and other good prizes after I get these |
| 01:01:56 |
academic jobbies is out of the way. Now, as you know, at Lawndale High we prefer |
| 01:02:00 |
to reward students for both their scholarship and contribution to student life. |
| 01:02:04 |
But, occasionally, a student does so well in one area that we are forced to |
| 01:02:08 |
recognize him or her despite crippling deficiencies in the other. And so, I give |
| 01:02:12 |
you the winner of this year's Lawndale High School Diane Fossey Award for |
| 01:02:16 |
dazzling academic achievement in the face of near-total misanthropy... |
| 01:02:21 |
Ms. Daria Morgendorffer! |
| 01:02:24 |
Bravo, bravo! |
| 01:02:26 |
Very good, Daria! You go, girlfriend! |
| 01:02:28 |
Brav... oh! |
| 01:02:30 |
All right, Timothy! This is it! You've gone this far; you can't turn back now! |
| 01:02:34 |
Anthony! Where are you going? |
| 01:02:36 |
Sorry, but that right hook is a killer! |
| 01:02:38 |
Now, Janet, I know you're disappointed... |
| 01:02:41 |
No, I'm not! I'm intrigued... |
| 01:02:43 |
...but as the poet said, time will heal thy wounded heart in... you're what? |
| 01:02:48 |
Intrigued by this alluring new backbone of yours. Where have you been hiding |
| 01:02:53 |
that erogenous chutzpah all these years, you big lug? |
| 01:02:56 |
Oh, well, I... |
| 01:03:08 |
Um... thank you. I'm not much for public speaking, or much for speaking, or, |
| 01:03:14 |
come to think of it, much for the public. And I'm not very good at lying. So let |
| 01:03:18 |
me just say that, in my experience, high school sucks. If I had to do it all |
| 01:03:23 |
over again, I'd have started advanced placement classes in preschool so I could |
| 01:03:27 |
go from eighth grade straight to college. |
| 01:03:30 |
However, given the unalterable fact that high school sucks, I'd like to add that |
| 01:03:35 |
if you're lucky enough to have a good friend and a family that cares, it doesn't |
| 01:03:39 |
have to suck quite as much. |
| 01:03:41 |
Otherwise, my advice is: stand firm for what you believe in, until and unless |
| 01:03:46 |
logic and experience prove you wrong; remember, when the emperor looks naked, |
| 01:03:50 |
the emperor is naked; the truth and a lie are not "sort of the same thing"; and |
| 01:03:55 |
there's no aspect, no facet, no moment of life that can't be improved with pizza. |
| 01:04:02 |
Thank you. |
| 01:04:13 |
So, dazzling academic achievement, eh? What a sellout. |
| 01:04:17 |
I know. And then I had the perfect opportunity to beat Ms. Li senseless with my |
| 01:04:22 |
trophy, and what do I do? Give a heart-warming speech. |
| 01:04:25 |
You're getting soft around the edges, Morgendorffer. |
| 01:04:27 |
Maybe, or maybe you've got glaucoma. |
| 01:04:31 |
To college! I can't wait! What do you think we'll find when we get there? |
| 01:04:34 |
Hmm. That the students are shockingly ignorant, the professors self-centered and |
| 01:04:39 |
corrupt, and the entire system geared soley to the pursuit of funding? |
| 01:04:43 |
Hmmm, yes. You know that thing I said about you getting soft? |
| 01:04:46 |
Yeah? |
| 01:04:47 |
I take it back. |
| 01:04:49 |
Written by Glen Eichler and Peggy Nicoll |
| 01:04:52 |
Synchro by Janez |
