|
Ace Ventura Jr Pet Detective
|
| 00:01:05 |
I've got you now. |
| 00:01:20 |
That's it, |
| 00:01:23 |
Nibble the powdery cinnamon bliss. |
| 00:01:29 |
No! Your path ends in death! |
| 00:01:31 |
(woman screams) |
| 00:01:41 |
(baby cries) |
| 00:01:43 |
(baby giggles) |
| 00:01:45 |
(people gasp) |
| 00:02:24 |
Nooooooo! |
| 00:02:40 |
You have been saved. |
| 00:02:46 |
Aaargh! |
| 00:02:48 |
This is certainly an ironic situation, |
| 00:02:52 |
with an apex predator there |
| 00:02:55 |
holding this little guy |
| 00:02:58 |
Hey, Mom! |
| 00:03:01 |
Ace Irwin Ventura, get out of that habitat |
| 00:03:07 |
OK. |
| 00:03:08 |
Stay! |
| 00:03:10 |
Aaaaargh! |
| 00:03:16 |
- How many times have I told y ou? |
| 00:03:18 |
- Visiting me... |
| 00:03:21 |
- And this is the last time I get to come here if I'm... |
| 00:03:25 |
- I'm serious, Ace. |
| 00:03:28 |
- And do y ou knowwhy? |
| 00:03:34 |
I'm sorry, Mom. |
| 00:03:40 |
It's a mouse, Ace. |
| 00:03:42 |
That's why we have traps here. |
| 00:03:44 |
You are not - I repeat, not - responsible |
| 00:03:48 |
in every corner of this planet. |
| 00:03:54 |
- I'm not? |
| 00:03:58 |
Now give me the mouse. |
| 00:04:05 |
And the hedgehog. |
| 00:04:10 |
And the guinea pig. |
| 00:04:12 |
And the ferret. |
| 00:04:16 |
And the toad. |
| 00:04:17 |
Oh! There we go. |
| 00:04:22 |
What? |
| 00:04:23 |
- Baby gator. |
| 00:04:29 |
Fine. Here. |
| 00:04:31 |
Nowy ou're late for school. |
| 00:04:34 |
- Hey, what's that? |
| 00:04:36 |
- What's going on over here? |
| 00:04:39 |
- Ace. OK, look... |
| 00:04:41 |
The Chinese governmentloaned us Pong Ping |
| 00:04:47 |
There's gonna be an unveiling |
| 00:04:49 |
I know. I promise. |
| 00:04:52 |
No try ing to find missing pets |
| 00:04:56 |
- Even if they're about to get run over. |
| 00:05:02 |
And I will try to be normal. |
| 00:05:06 |
Thank y ou, A.J. |
| 00:05:10 |
OK. |
| 00:05:13 |
(bell rings) |
| 00:05:17 |
(Ace Jr.) Normal. |
| 00:05:19 |
Normal. |
| 00:05:20 |
Must be normal. |
| 00:05:25 |
(boy) Tara, |
| 00:05:27 |
Yeah. I woke up this morning |
| 00:05:33 |
Rabbit. Mimzy. Lost! |
| 00:05:36 |
- Of course we're depressed. |
| 00:05:41 |
We're emotional wrecks about it. |
| 00:05:44 |
I will be normal. |
| 00:05:48 |
- My friend can'tfind her chinchilla. |
| 00:05:52 |
It's an animal-nabbing epidemic! |
| 00:05:55 |
- (boy) Laura, what abouty ou? |
| 00:05:58 |
The other day, Greeny, my incredibly rare |
| 00:06:03 |
Aargh! |
| 00:06:11 |
(PA) Yourattention, please. |
| 00:06:14 |
Mr. Chompers, |
| 00:06:18 |
(all) Awww. |
| 00:06:19 |
Any studentwith information |
| 00:06:31 |
Well, he's gone. |
| 00:06:33 |
Do y ou know |
| 00:06:35 |
- Well, I wouldn't say I knowwhere he is. |
| 00:06:40 |
- Not exactly. |
| 00:06:43 |
- Define "lead." |
| 00:06:47 |
No. Wait! |
| 00:06:49 |
- What makes y ou think that? |
| 00:06:54 |
Ooh, what are y ou? |
| 00:07:01 |
finder guy? |
| 00:07:04 |
(girls laugh) |
| 00:07:09 |
Just give me four day s. |
| 00:07:13 |
You got 72 hours. |
| 00:07:16 |
OK. 72 hours. |
| 00:07:18 |
That's like... twwo weeks. |
| 00:07:21 |
That's great! |
| 00:07:25 |
(dog barks) |
| 00:07:26 |
I knowwhat Mom said, but this is important. |
| 00:07:30 |
(whimpers) |
| 00:07:32 |
Cowboy up, dog, |
| 00:07:37 |
I hear a whole lot oflost pets |
| 00:07:41 |
(rings bell) |
| 00:07:49 |
That'll do it. |
| 00:07:51 |
- This is the busiest intersection in town, Ox. |
| 00:07:56 |
Thousands of people will see this. |
| 00:08:01 |
Recognize y our Mimzy? |
| 00:08:04 |
- No. |
| 00:08:07 |
Uh-oh. |
| 00:08:10 |
Numberfour, |
| 00:08:12 |
Would y ou guy s stop multiply ing? |
| 00:08:16 |
Well, how about now? |
| 00:08:19 |
Lost hamster. |
| 00:08:21 |
Help find Milton. |
| 00:08:24 |
Do a brother a solid. |
| 00:08:27 |
Please, help find Milton. |
| 00:08:30 |
- I found Milton! |
| 00:08:34 |
I didn'tfind Milton. |
| 00:08:39 |
Offensive action! |
| 00:08:42 |
(both fart) |
| 00:08:47 |
(skunk splutters) |
| 00:08:49 |
Now, that's offensive. |
| 00:08:51 |
- Stop toy ing with our emotions. |
| 00:08:55 |
- (girl) Skunk! |
| 00:09:06 |
Waaaaah! |
| 00:09:08 |
It's called "papering the town," |
| 00:09:13 |
Avery effective method |
| 00:09:28 |
(Ox barks) |
| 00:09:30 |
That's not true. I treat every one of my missing pets |
| 00:09:36 |
Well, here we are, Ox. |
| 00:09:39 |
Casa de Laura Wilson's house. |
| 00:09:42 |
- The scene of the crime. |
| 00:09:45 |
Sorry, old friend. |
| 00:09:50 |
- (Ox barks) |
| 00:09:52 |
(Ox growls) |
| 00:09:55 |
Oh, y ou think so, huh? |
| 00:10:00 |
We'll find her pet, |
| 00:10:04 |
- Hi, Ace. |
| 00:10:09 |
- What? |
| 00:10:12 |
Um... |
| 00:10:13 |
Your koi fish. |
| 00:10:15 |
She's itty-bitty. |
| 00:10:18 |
Yeah, she sure is. |
| 00:10:22 |
Much like a grunion. |
| 00:10:24 |
Stand aside, ma'am. |
| 00:10:27 |
Oxnard, while I'm y oung? |
| 00:10:31 |
Crime scene is secure. |
| 00:10:33 |
Initial suspects include the scuba man |
| 00:10:44 |
Rememberwhen I brought her into school |
| 00:10:49 |
The next morning when I woke up, |
| 00:10:52 |
Really? |
| 00:10:56 |
Case number 349A49320451. |
| 00:11:00 |
Neptune-Alpha-Charlie-Horse. |
| 00:11:02 |
Missing green koi fish. |
| 00:11:06 |
Question. |
| 00:11:09 |
- Calling her? She's a fish. |
| 00:11:14 |
- May I? |
| 00:11:25 |
(gargles) Greeny! |
| 00:11:27 |
Greeny! Greeny! |
| 00:11:32 |
Greeny! |
| 00:11:34 |
Yoo-hoo! |
| 00:11:38 |
- Well, she's gone. |
| 00:11:42 |
Owner is one Laura Wilson. |
| 00:11:44 |
Smart, funny, greatlistener. |
| 00:11:48 |
Excellent personal hy giene, |
| 00:11:51 |
a smile that'll make y ou feel |
| 00:11:53 |
and skin like peaches and cream. |
| 00:11:57 |
Exceptfor may be this one spot |
| 00:12:01 |
- Possibly a pimple? |
| 00:12:04 |
- Oh, I'm such an idiot. |
| 00:12:07 |
No one asked y ou. Um... |
| 00:12:10 |
Oxnard and I must be going now. |
| 00:12:12 |
Anyw way, y our collection of aquatic friends |
| 00:12:17 |
- (clock ticks) |
| 00:12:19 |
...three day s. |
| 00:12:20 |
- Really? |
| 00:12:24 |
You broke y our promise. |
| 00:12:27 |
That I'm not responsible for the well-being |
| 00:12:32 |
- But, Mom, I had to. |
| 00:12:37 |
I got this job so y ou could see animals |
| 00:12:41 |
safely and with complete supervision. |
| 00:12:44 |
Yeah, but it's not the same, OK? |
| 00:12:46 |
I want to find lost animals. |
| 00:12:50 |
OK, I tried every other extracurricular activity |
| 00:12:54 |
and I mastered them all. |
| 00:13:01 |
What? |
| 00:13:03 |
(sings loudly) Aaaaaaaaaah! |
| 00:13:09 |
Next. |
| 00:13:14 |
(blows whistle) |
| 00:13:15 |
Bananas. |
| 00:13:17 |
P-r-e-t-t-y. Pretty. |
| 00:13:21 |
- (man) That is correct. |
| 00:13:23 |
Yourword is |
| 00:13:29 |
P-r-e-t-t-y. |
| 00:13:32 |
- Pretty. |
| 00:13:43 |
(sniffs) |
| 00:13:48 |
- This was a dumb idea! |
| 00:13:54 |
Aaaaaargh! Argh! |
| 00:13:57 |
OK, may be I didn't |
| 00:14:01 |
but may be athletics |
| 00:14:05 |
W-wait, was Dad an athlete? |
| 00:14:07 |
A good speller? |
| 00:14:10 |
This is not abouty our dad. |
| 00:14:14 |
- Mom, y ou alway s say that. |
| 00:14:18 |
- We can have itwhen y ou're older. |
| 00:14:20 |
I am older, Mom. I'm 12 y ears old |
| 00:14:25 |
and I don't have a dad for... |
| 00:14:27 |
"that talk." |
| 00:14:30 |
Honey, every body y our age |
| 00:14:34 |
No, Mom. (slurps noisily) |
| 00:14:39 |
Not these feelings. |
| 00:14:45 |
That's it! You are not eating out of a dog bowl, |
| 00:14:50 |
and y ou'll use the toiletfor something other than drinking. |
| 00:14:55 |
- But, Mom, this is who I am. |
| 00:14:58 |
It's who y ou're acting like. |
| 00:15:20 |
(panda squeals) |
| 00:15:26 |
(panda roars) |
| 00:15:28 |
(pandas whine) |
| 00:15:39 |
Huh?! |
| 00:15:55 |
(fartss) |
| 00:16:52 |
- Morning. |
| 00:16:55 |
- Hey, what's with that hat on? |
| 00:16:58 |
- Ace. |
| 00:17:02 |
You said y ou wanted me to be like them, |
| 00:17:07 |
Not at the table. |
| 00:17:22 |
Mom. |
| 00:17:25 |
- Oh, my God. |
| 00:17:27 |
- It's happening. |
| 00:17:30 |
(man) Puty our hands up! |
| 00:17:36 |
Stay still! |
| 00:17:40 |
Don't move! |
| 00:17:43 |
- Melissa Ventura? |
| 00:17:46 |
Oh, wow. |
| 00:17:51 |
What? "The Cinnamon Hippo"? |
| 00:17:54 |
Never mind that. |
| 00:17:58 |
- National Bureau of Fish and Wildlife. |
| 00:18:03 |
Do y ou have any idea how often they let a member |
| 00:18:08 |
Yeah. Never. |
| 00:18:13 |
Give me that. |
| 00:18:17 |
OK, fine. Jeez. |
| 00:18:21 |
- (man) Ranger Hollander? They're towing y our car, sir. |
| 00:18:24 |
(Melissa) Wait. |
| 00:18:27 |
Your case is the biggest in history. They're calling guy s |
| 00:18:34 |
You left alot of evidence at the scene, Mrs. Ventura. |
| 00:18:39 |
- In English, Ranger Smith. |
| 00:18:44 |
My mom works for the zoo. |
| 00:18:46 |
And y our bank accounts show |
| 00:18:50 |
I suspect a panda cub |
| 00:18:53 |
We've found something, sir! |
| 00:18:58 |
What is this? |
| 00:19:05 |
- Your ransom note? |
| 00:19:09 |
- And this. |
| 00:19:13 |
- Sir, y ourfinger... prints. |
| 00:19:17 |
They give us all tranquilizer guns. |
| 00:19:21 |
Thatwas actually very funny. |
| 00:19:25 |
That's enough, Ace. |
| 00:19:27 |
Melissa Ventura, |
| 00:19:29 |
y ou're under arrest. |
| 00:19:31 |
- What? (snarls and growls) |
| 00:19:34 |
Down, boy! Down, boy! |
| 00:19:36 |
(snarls) |
| 00:19:37 |
It's all been a mistake. This has all been a mistake. |
| 00:19:42 |
That's so good. |
| 00:19:47 |
(gasps) |
| 00:19:50 |
- (Hollander) Come on. |
| 00:19:57 |
- Give her the cellphone. |
| 00:20:00 |
No. You promised. |
| 00:20:05 |
One call. |
| 00:20:08 |
- OK, while y ou walk. Come on. |
| 00:20:13 |
But, Mom, Grandpa's gonna be |
| 00:20:17 |
- I'm calling y our other grandpa. |
| 00:20:20 |
Grandpa... |
| 00:20:24 |
- Ventura. |
| 00:20:28 |
Rex? It's Melissa. |
| 00:20:33 |
(coughing and wheezing) |
| 00:20:40 |
(coughing continues) |
| 00:20:51 |
Come on, Spark. |
| 00:20:54 |
Sorry about that. |
| 00:21:01 |
Hello, Ace. |
| 00:21:03 |
Grandpa? |
| 00:21:05 |
First thing, y our mom is fine. |
| 00:21:08 |
She's gonna have a bail hearing on Friday. |
| 00:21:13 |
(wheezes) |
| 00:21:15 |
(coughs) |
| 00:21:19 |
Darn hairballs. |
| 00:21:22 |
My cat's on his eighth life. |
| 00:21:25 |
There are some spots |
| 00:21:28 |
(retches) |
| 00:21:29 |
(coughs) |
| 00:21:31 |
- Too much information. |
| 00:21:37 |
What are y ou now? 84? |
| 00:21:40 |
- Grandpa, I'm 12. |
| 00:21:43 |
84 y ears old. |
| 00:21:46 |
I'll bety ou're helping animals by now, |
| 00:21:49 |
Come on, |
| 00:21:52 |
Come on, Sparky. |
| 00:21:57 |
Attaboy. |
| 00:21:58 |
So, these are the animals |
| 00:22:02 |
Well, I was, |
| 00:22:06 |
Re-he-eally? |
| 00:22:15 |
(Laura) Hi, Ace. |
| 00:22:19 |
- You obsess much? |
| 00:22:23 |
Sometimes. |
| 00:22:26 |
- Hey, Grandpa, can I ask y ou a question? |
| 00:22:31 |
Whatwas my dad like? |
| 00:22:34 |
Well, what did y our mom |
| 00:22:37 |
Nothing. She say s that he disappeared |
| 00:22:41 |
and that I'm too y oung |
| 00:22:44 |
Yeah, well, y our mom's got good reasons |
| 00:22:48 |
But can I ask y ou this? |
| 00:22:50 |
Have y ou everwondered |
| 00:22:55 |
- Because... |
| 00:22:59 |
- I don't know. |
| 00:23:03 |
AVentura. |
| 00:23:07 |
Now, although it took along time |
| 00:23:12 |
with the animal world, |
| 00:23:15 |
eventually, |
| 00:23:17 |
Even the carnivores. |
| 00:23:20 |
Down through history, |
| 00:23:23 |
including Charles Ventura Darwin. |
| 00:23:26 |
You knowwho he was, don'ty ou? |
| 00:23:29 |
He was the evolution guy, right? |
| 00:23:31 |
Survival of the least |
| 00:23:38 |
Did y ou know |
| 00:23:42 |
One of y our ancestors, the greatAntarctic explorer |
| 00:23:48 |
Although he and his crewwere starving to death, |
| 00:23:53 |
Jacques Ventura Cousteau, |
| 00:23:56 |
who invented the scuba suit |
| 00:23:59 |
so thatfinally |
| 00:24:03 |
Itfitlike a glove. |
| 00:24:06 |
So, y ou see, Ace Jr., |
| 00:24:11 |
of animal advocacy, |
| 00:24:13 |
communion |
| 00:24:18 |
Well, was my dad |
| 00:24:23 |
I've probably said too much already, |
| 00:24:26 |
buty our mom was in trouble |
| 00:24:30 |
So, whaty ou're say ing is |
| 00:24:35 |
I'm not say ing any thing. |
| 00:24:39 |
I'm just say ing. |
| 00:24:41 |
Say ing what? |
| 00:24:45 |
Your Y chromosome |
| 00:24:49 |
You're one of us. |
| 00:24:55 |
- Come on, Sparky. |
| 00:24:58 |
I'm pretty sure he's dead. |
| 00:25:02 |
He's not dead. |
| 00:25:05 |
Come on. |
| 00:25:09 |
My goodness! |
| 00:25:16 |
(grunting) |
| 00:25:29 |
Hey, if I say over the wall, it's over the wall. |
| 00:25:34 |
Aaaargh! |
| 00:25:38 |
Jeez! I didn't know |
| 00:25:43 |
(Hollander) "Russell Hollander, |
| 00:25:48 |
I like the way that sounds. |
| 00:25:53 |
Case closed, |
| 00:25:56 |
- You are guilty. |
| 00:26:01 |
(growls) |
| 00:26:19 |
Case number 349A49320452. |
| 00:26:24 |
Missing panda cub. |
| 00:26:27 |
Or, if y ou speak Panda, "Grrrrr." |
| 00:26:31 |
On loan from national government. |
| 00:26:34 |
Country: China. |
| 00:26:36 |
Crime scene |
| 00:26:40 |
As expected, |
| 00:26:43 |
And the only other prints are panda... |
| 00:26:46 |
Or are they? |
| 00:26:50 |
Holy roly-poly! |
| 00:26:55 |
- I knew it. |
| 00:27:00 |
Uh-oh. |
| 00:27:04 |
Hey, look, Pong Ping, |
| 00:27:07 |
I knewy our uncle when he was here. |
| 00:27:13 |
Uh, Bing Bang, or... |
| 00:27:16 |
Hong Kong? |
| 00:27:20 |
(growls sorrowfully) |
| 00:27:24 |
You miss y our cub? |
| 00:27:29 |
Yeah, I miss my mom, too. |
| 00:27:33 |
But I found some really important clues |
| 00:27:39 |
(Pong Ping whines) |
| 00:27:42 |
I'm not the world's greatest, uh... |
| 00:27:46 |
pet sleuth? |
| 00:27:49 |
Finder? Investigator? |
| 00:27:53 |
But... |
| 00:27:55 |
but I'll try. |
| 00:27:56 |
I promise. |
| 00:28:16 |
Hey, kid! |
| 00:28:19 |
Yeah, but call me A-Plus. |
| 00:28:21 |
(boy) You're dead, Plushinski! |
| 00:28:24 |
Move! |
| 00:28:26 |
Uh-oh. |
| 00:28:28 |
(girls scream) |
| 00:28:33 |
(computerized voice) Proximityy alert. |
| 00:28:37 |
Just give up the gummies, Plushinski, |
| 00:28:41 |
Never! |
| 00:28:45 |
Excuse me. |
| 00:28:47 |
Move! |
| 00:28:55 |
Argh! Aaargh! |
| 00:29:01 |
Move it! |
| 00:29:05 |
Where is he? |
| 00:29:13 |
Where'd he go? |
| 00:29:18 |
(bell rings) |
| 00:29:28 |
Hello? |
| 00:29:30 |
A-Plus? |
| 00:29:33 |
(A-Plus) Why are y ou talking to me? |
| 00:29:37 |
- Who just said that? |
| 00:29:41 |
You're not gonna beat me up, are y ou? |
| 00:29:44 |
No. I need y our help. |
| 00:29:48 |
(A-Plus) Oh. In here. |
| 00:30:06 |
What the... |
| 00:30:08 |
(loudly) Awesome! |
| 00:30:14 |
(whispers) Awesome. |
| 00:30:32 |
Holy cellar-dweller, Batman! |
| 00:30:36 |
This place is... |
| 00:30:39 |
This whole place was forgotten about |
| 00:30:43 |
Made my lab. |
| 00:30:46 |
I can't believe I have a friend |
| 00:30:48 |
and I didn't even |
| 00:30:52 |
Oh, my God, |
| 00:30:56 |
Hey! Uh, st... |
| 00:30:58 |
- That's a bully-tracking device. |
| 00:31:00 |
They transmit to my GPS here. |
| 00:31:03 |
A bully eats a harmless-Iooking candy |
| 00:31:07 |
I can track him |
| 00:31:10 |
- 12 if he eats chili. |
| 00:31:13 |
So, how can I help y ou... |
| 00:31:15 |
friend? |
| 00:31:17 |
Um... I have some measurements |
| 00:31:21 |
(Ace Jr.) These printss are 1.5mm deep, |
| 00:31:28 |
and these, which are 5mm. |
| 00:31:30 |
Fascinating, Captain. These measurements |
| 00:31:35 |
weighing approximately 125Ibs, |
| 00:31:38 |
183.253Ibs |
| 00:31:41 |
and 390Ibs respectively. |
| 00:31:45 |
So, any thing else? |
| 00:31:48 |
Howlong would it take for y ou to hack into a website |
| 00:31:54 |
We're in like Tolkien. |
| 00:31:58 |
His email address is |
| 00:32:04 |
Pennington Corporation. |
| 00:32:09 |
- Oh, he's so cool. |
| 00:32:13 |
Yes. And he's extraordinarily popular. |
| 00:32:16 |
Of all the tables in the cafeteria, |
| 00:32:20 |
(snortss with laughter) |
| 00:32:22 |
- Do y ou mind if I keep one of these? |
| 00:32:25 |
OK. I'll just... |
| 00:32:28 |
be on my way. |
| 00:32:31 |
I'll be on my way. |
| 00:32:34 |
Really? And y ou won't even pretend |
| 00:32:38 |
- No, no. |
| 00:32:45 |
(whines) |
| 00:32:47 |
- (Ace Jr.) Grandpa, I'm pretty sure he's dead. |
| 00:32:50 |
He's just a good actor. |
| 00:32:53 |
Dead dogs don't get dinner. |
| 00:32:55 |
(whimpers) |
| 00:32:57 |
Huh. All right. |
| 00:33:07 |
Hard day at the office? |
| 00:33:10 |
It's just that I found all these clues |
| 00:33:13 |
but to do that, |
| 00:33:17 |
So, y ou're working on a case? |
| 00:33:21 |
- Yeah. |
| 00:33:24 |
Yeah. Cops. |
| 00:33:27 |
Face it, Grandpa. I'm just a kid who lied to his mom. |
| 00:33:32 |
Well, y ou can start |
| 00:33:37 |
Who y ou were born to be. |
| 00:33:43 |
Now, ly ing to y our mom is one thing, |
| 00:33:46 |
butly ing to y ourself, Ace Jr... |
| 00:33:49 |
Son, thatleads to |
| 00:34:10 |
That's not normal. |
| 00:34:12 |
I will be normal. |
| 00:34:18 |
Hah! |
| 00:34:19 |
Hi, this is Pennington Jr. |
| 00:34:24 |
You're invited to my birthday partyy. |
| 00:34:27 |
(murmurs) Yes, I'm invited. |
| 00:34:30 |
- I'm invited! |
| 00:34:33 |
Uh-uh-uh-uh. Press. |
| 00:34:36 |
Perez Ventura. |
| 00:34:40 |
- Not on the list. |
| 00:34:44 |
I'm with the Daily Rumor Mill. |
| 00:34:47 |
School paper. |
| 00:34:50 |
It's in something called the Constitution. |
| 00:34:55 |
Whoa, whoa, whoa! |
| 00:34:59 |
(clicks fingers) Let him through. |
| 00:35:01 |
(man) Put him down, boy s. |
| 00:35:03 |
(camera clicks) |
| 00:35:04 |
That's admissible evidence. I haven't been humiliated like |
| 00:35:15 |
We're on a tight schedule. |
| 00:35:18 |
(camera clicks) |
| 00:35:21 |
Is that a forest up there? |
| 00:35:24 |
You could make |
| 00:35:26 |
Wow. |
| 00:35:30 |
- You cleaned up Big Foot here real nice. |
| 00:35:35 |
But the invitations have been recorded. |
| 00:35:38 |
- (man) Waiter, lunch. |
| 00:35:42 |
Itwill gety ou into the gy mnasium on the day of the party, |
| 00:35:48 |
- It'll make headlines. |
| 00:35:52 |
"Billionaire Boy |
| 00:35:56 |
Or, "I Had Pennington Jr.'s Alien Love Baby." |
| 00:36:02 |
You're threatening to blackmail me |
| 00:36:06 |
I'm a paparazzi. |
| 00:36:09 |
But I will get off y our back |
| 00:36:16 |
Dr. Michael Sickinger. A brilliant scientist |
| 00:36:21 |
- It's one of the finest. |
| 00:36:24 |
Unfortunately, he's quite insane. |
| 00:36:28 |
- Incontinently. |
| 00:36:31 |
Incomprehensibly. |
| 00:36:34 |
Oh, no. |
| 00:36:37 |
I believe he's now the chief of non-telegenic |
| 00:36:46 |
- What? |
| 00:36:51 |
Oh, I will. |
| 00:36:55 |
By e-by e, then. |
| 00:37:00 |
No touching the camera! |
| 00:37:04 |
- Where is my rabbit, loser? |
| 00:37:08 |
You were supposed |
| 00:37:10 |
- You owe us for the extra therapy session. |
| 00:37:16 |
Argh! Holy magenta! |
| 00:37:20 |
Uh-oh! |
| 00:37:21 |
Why do y ou |
| 00:37:23 |
Ladies, is this really necessary? Can'twe talk this over |
| 00:37:30 |
You said I had 72 hours! |
| 00:37:35 |
- You've had eight day s. |
| 00:37:38 |
- People that pee in the pool and people who lie about it. |
| 00:37:44 |
(bell rings) |
| 00:37:50 |
(girls laugh) |
| 00:37:51 |
(imitates girls'laughter) |
| 00:37:55 |
- What? |
| 00:38:01 |
I gotta break into Dr. Sickinger's office |
| 00:38:05 |
(A-Plus) Oh, |
| 00:38:10 |
Would y ou get out of there? |
| 00:38:14 |
- Sounds like a three-man job. Hey, why are y ou all we... |
| 00:38:19 |
...with the wet, OK? |
| 00:38:22 |
About the three-man job. |
| 00:38:24 |
I know someone. |
| 00:38:29 |
to convince this beautiful animal-Iover |
| 00:38:34 |
Please help me break into |
| 00:38:37 |
so we can stop the guy who stole Ting Tang |
| 00:38:43 |
Um... OK. |
| 00:38:46 |
- Really? |
| 00:38:51 |
- Are those from my mom's garden? |
| 00:38:54 |
Shut up. |
| 00:38:57 |
Right this way, folks. |
| 00:39:06 |
OK. |
| 00:39:07 |
You are all in |
| 00:39:10 |
the rarest, most complete |
| 00:39:14 |
It has an estimated value |
| 00:39:18 |
Uh-huh. |
| 00:39:21 |
Do not touch it. |
| 00:39:26 |
- $100 million? |
| 00:39:29 |
"Or not?" |
| 00:39:33 |
Every body, stay close. |
| 00:39:40 |
- Oh, a T. Rex. Cool. |
| 00:39:45 |
He's my Seeing Ey e dog. |
| 00:39:47 |
He's facing backwards. |
| 00:39:50 |
And y ou're not blind. |
| 00:39:53 |
I can see again! I can see! |
| 00:39:55 |
It's a miracle! It's a miracle! |
| 00:39:57 |
- Sir. I mean it, y ou... |
| 00:40:02 |
I'm so sorry about all this. |
| 00:40:11 |
- Make him stop doing that! |
| 00:40:16 |
Wha... |
| 00:40:17 |
Oh. Oh, jeez. Oxnard Hueneme Carpinteria Ventura, |
| 00:40:23 |
Sir, that is a priceless skeleton |
| 00:40:26 |
Please! |
| 00:40:29 |
- It's going to survive alittle doggy love nibble. |
| 00:40:40 |
May be not. |
| 00:40:42 |
Oh! |
| 00:40:48 |
OK. OK. I told y ou itwould work. |
| 00:41:00 |
Security! |
| 00:41:10 |
- (man) Have y ou seen alittle kid run past here? |
| 00:41:52 |
- A-Plus, are y ou there? |
| 00:41:58 |
Let's starta band. Do you play an instrument? |
| 00:42:00 |
I used to play the bagpipes, |
| 00:42:04 |
Come on! I'm in the office and it's really freaky in here. |
| 00:42:16 |
Ohhh! Argh! |
| 00:42:20 |
(man) Don'tlet him get away! |
| 00:42:23 |
(man #2) That's him! |
| 00:42:28 |
Aaargh! Oh! |
| 00:42:36 |
OK. Your program's running. |
| 00:42:38 |
- Oh, one otherthing. |
| 00:42:42 |
In my instant messenger, |
| 00:42:48 |
- No. |
| 00:42:50 |
- No. |
| 00:42:51 |
Denied. |
| 00:42:53 |
Butwe're friends now, right? |
| 00:42:55 |
Sure, A-Plus. We're friends. |
| 00:42:58 |
And y ou're a girl, right? |
| 00:43:00 |
Duh. |
| 00:43:02 |
So I can call y ou my girlfriend, right? |
| 00:43:06 |
Ewww! Not! |
| 00:43:08 |
Fine, be thatway. |
| 00:43:11 |
- (man #1) There he goes! There he goes! |
| 00:43:18 |
You... |
| 00:43:27 |
OK, it's finished. |
| 00:43:35 |
(man) He's over there! |
| 00:43:44 |
Beep beep! |
| 00:43:49 |
- Copy that. |
| 00:44:03 |
Come here! |
| 00:44:05 |
(men shoutangrily) |
| 00:44:09 |
(man) Owwwww! |
| 00:44:16 |
Argh! |
| 00:44:17 |
Jeez! With the sneaking up on me, OK? |
| 00:44:20 |
- Mission accomplished. Where's Ox? |
| 00:44:24 |
- You're putting that bone back. |
| 00:44:26 |
(man) All right, he's in the tunnel! |
| 00:44:44 |
Whoa! |
| 00:44:49 |
(man) Stay where y ou are! |
| 00:44:51 |
Fan out. |
| 00:44:53 |
Do y ou Heely? |
| 00:44:56 |
(# "Anthem"by Zebrahead) |
| 00:45:01 |
- Shall we? |
| 00:45:05 |
Fun time's over. |
| 00:45:26 |
Go! |
| 00:45:30 |
Hey, that's my girl! |
| 00:45:32 |
Goty ou! |
| 00:45:38 |
Goty ou! (whistles) |
| 00:45:43 |
Vámonos! |
| 00:45:47 |
- (Laura) You're not gonnalet him keep that? |
| 00:45:52 |
Where are the kids? |
| 00:45:55 |
Where did they go? |
| 00:45:58 |
Bunch of idiots! |
| 00:46:02 |
Herfinancial situation is dire |
| 00:46:06 |
she has ready access |
| 00:46:09 |
The agency's skilled forensics team |
| 00:46:12 |
that the only fresh footprints at the crime scene |
| 00:46:16 |
I object! |
| 00:46:27 |
Excuse me. |
| 00:46:30 |
Ace Ventura Darrow Hutz Junior, Esquire, |
| 00:46:33 |
of the following lawfirms |
| 00:46:36 |
Dewey, Fleeceum & Grab, |
| 00:46:39 |
Shakem, Down & Hard, |
| 00:46:42 |
Imontha, Take & Lovitt, |
| 00:46:45 |
and the non-profit Mater Innocentus. |
| 00:46:48 |
My mom is innocent. |
| 00:46:54 |
Your Honor, this is ridiculous. |
| 00:46:56 |
He's a 12-y ear-old behavioral case |
| 00:47:00 |
This is a bail hearing. |
| 00:47:03 |
Continue, y oung man. |
| 00:47:05 |
Ow, that must have hurt, |
| 00:47:18 |
- Thank y ou, paralegal Laura. |
| 00:47:30 |
(Ace Jr. Fartss) |
| 00:47:32 |
- Come on, Your Honor! |
| 00:47:46 |
- Thank y ou, pretty paralegal Laura. |
| 00:47:50 |
Come on, boy s. |
| 00:48:01 |
Drop it. |
| 00:48:06 |
The only footprints thatAgent Hollander |
| 00:48:11 |
found at the scene were... |
| 00:48:13 |
(breathless) OK, alittle help. |
| 00:48:20 |
And let me remind y ou, |
| 00:48:22 |
- I'm not. |
| 00:48:25 |
Be seated, y ou maggot, |
| 00:48:30 |
Anyw way, the only footprints |
| 00:48:35 |
besides my mom's shoeprints, |
| 00:48:39 |
The average panda weighs 352Ibs, |
| 00:48:44 |
At overfive feet in length, |
| 00:48:48 |
They use a thumb-like |
| 00:48:50 |
and would create |
| 00:48:53 |
But, as y ou can see, |
| 00:48:57 |
that I just created |
| 00:49:00 |
A man weighing 183Ibs would indeed establish |
| 00:49:06 |
We are looking for a 183Ibs man, not a... |
| 00:49:11 |
- 110. |
| 00:49:13 |
- 135. |
| 00:49:17 |
If the footprints don'tfit, |
| 00:49:20 |
(applause) |
| 00:49:22 |
- Order! Order! |
| 00:49:25 |
That's Ventura with a V, |
| 00:49:28 |
I plead for acquittal, Your Honor. |
| 00:49:30 |
Game, set, match. |
| 00:49:36 |
Let me get this straight. |
| 00:49:41 |
Or y ou're just making all this up. |
| 00:49:48 |
Um... Well... |
| 00:49:50 |
It's a hypothesis. |
| 00:49:56 |
Well, that's terrific, tiger. But, listen, right now, |
| 00:50:01 |
unless someone else wants to put on |
| 00:50:06 |
(laughter) |
| 00:50:10 |
Order! |
| 00:50:13 |
It's an interesting theory, but this case involves |
| 00:50:19 |
Bail is set at $500,000. |
| 00:50:23 |
Melissa Ventura, y ou're remanded |
| 00:50:30 |
Ace, where did y ou get |
| 00:50:33 |
- You promised y ou wouldn't... |
| 00:50:36 |
- He carries around a dead dog, Ace. |
| 00:50:40 |
I thought I could help y ou solve the case |
| 00:50:44 |
but no one believes me, |
| 00:50:46 |
Of course I do. |
| 00:50:49 |
- Like y ou lost Dad? |
| 00:50:55 |
I realize now that no matterwhat I say, |
| 00:50:59 |
I wanty ou to know the truth |
| 00:51:02 |
I just didn't talk about him |
| 00:51:07 |
I didn'twanty ou |
| 00:51:10 |
What happened to him? |
| 00:51:14 |
He was on a case. |
| 00:51:16 |
Using an ultralight plane, he was leading |
| 00:51:21 |
back to theirwinter breeding ground in Miami. |
| 00:51:25 |
They said that he got disoriented, |
| 00:51:29 |
and he vanished from radar |
| 00:51:33 |
Oh, Ace. |
| 00:51:38 |
Time is up. |
| 00:51:40 |
I've been saving something for y ou. |
| 00:51:45 |
Yourfather bought this. |
| 00:51:47 |
He wanted y ou to have it |
| 00:51:53 |
Look up in the attic. |
| 00:51:55 |
- No, Mom, I promise, I'll be normal. |
| 00:51:59 |
Hollanderwill find the pandanapper |
| 00:52:02 |
- I love y ou, Ace! |
| 00:52:15 |
Ace, I'm so sorry. |
| 00:52:18 |
So what do we do now? |
| 00:52:21 |
Nothing. I'm aloser. |
| 00:52:24 |
Sorry abouty our koi fish. |
| 00:52:27 |
Come on, Ox. |
| 00:52:29 |
Hey, Laura, |
| 00:52:33 |
I have no idea. |
| 00:52:50 |
That's notwhat I think it is, is it? |
| 00:52:53 |
I guess. |
| 00:52:55 |
Your mom gave that to y ou? |
| 00:52:58 |
Yeah, but it's not important. |
| 00:53:02 |
What about the animals? |
| 00:53:05 |
Animals have never brought me |
| 00:53:07 |
I gotta be like every one else, Grandpa. |
| 00:53:10 |
- You can't. |
| 00:53:14 |
You'll never be like every one else, |
| 00:53:18 |
Justlike y our ancestors. |
| 00:53:21 |
Justlike y ourfather. |
| 00:53:23 |
Eaty our own food, Ox. |
| 00:53:26 |
I've been try ing to gety ou |
| 00:53:29 |
but I guess I'm just |
| 00:53:33 |
- Say what? |
| 00:53:40 |
Don'ty ou knowwhaty ou are? |
| 00:53:44 |
I'm a kid, right? |
| 00:53:47 |
You're more than that. |
| 00:53:50 |
You're a pet... |
| 00:53:55 |
detective. |
| 00:54:03 |
- Like my dad? |
| 00:54:06 |
- Whatwas he like? |
| 00:54:13 |
And y ou know, |
| 00:54:15 |
this thing y ou threw away, |
| 00:54:19 |
this is the key |
| 00:55:18 |
All righty, then. |
| 00:55:20 |
(# "Ace Is In The House"by Tone Loc) |
| 00:55:57 |
- Nice outfiit. |
| 00:56:01 |
Tara's wearing the latest in the "Spoiled and Shallow" |
| 00:56:06 |
Ventura, our therapist said for us to order y ou |
| 00:56:11 |
Franken Berry called. Count Chocula |
| 00:56:15 |
Get back in y our caskets. |
| 00:56:18 |
Because these are some sick puppies. |
| 00:56:21 |
Hey, watch the hair! |
| 00:56:41 |
Time for another |
| 00:56:43 |
- No, buty ou don't underst... |
| 00:56:49 |
Jeez, next time y ou're late like that, |
| 00:56:54 |
(Ox barks) |
| 00:56:57 |
Tell y our dog to back off, Ventura! |
| 00:57:00 |
Are y ou crazy? |
| 00:57:04 |
And he can smell y ourfear. |
| 00:57:06 |
(barks) |
| 00:57:08 |
You are Spartan! |
| 00:57:23 |
- What about our alligator? |
| 00:57:28 |
But right now, |
| 00:57:32 |
Oxnard! |
| 00:57:36 |
Oh, and sorry about that |
| 00:57:39 |
Ace? |
| 00:57:42 |
Ventura... |
| 00:57:44 |
Junior. |
| 00:57:46 |
Pet Detective. |
| 00:57:48 |
Um... OK. |
| 00:57:52 |
- What's wrong? |
| 00:57:56 |
The answer - every thing. |
| 00:57:59 |
- So y ou feel like solving that case? |
| 00:58:03 |
Even Tiger Woods shanks one |
| 00:58:06 |
But the past is past. |
| 00:58:08 |
- Now, A-Plus. |
| 00:58:13 |
I looked through Sickinger's hard drive. |
| 00:58:17 |
specializing in non-telegenic |
| 00:58:22 |
- In English, Mr. Spock. |
| 00:58:26 |
He planned a demonstration forlike-minded |
| 00:58:35 |
OK, I didn't understand |
| 00:58:38 |
exceptfor "ugly animals" |
| 00:58:40 |
He's organizing a protest |
| 00:58:44 |
at the Animal Actors Studio |
| 00:58:48 |
Itlooks like we're going |
| 00:58:50 |
L'chaim! |
| 00:58:54 |
I'll take a few of these for the road. |
| 00:58:57 |
- Field trip? Wait, do I need a permission slip? |
| 00:59:00 |
Have a meow-tastic day. |
| 00:59:05 |
Tabby say s, |
| 00:59:09 |
Thanks for coming. |
| 00:59:13 |
Thanks for coming. |
| 00:59:17 |
Thanks for coming. |
| 00:59:20 |
There's Sickinger! |
| 00:59:27 |
No justice, no peace! |
| 00:59:32 |
No justice, no peace! |
| 00:59:36 |
Take him down! |
| 00:59:38 |
Cease and desist immediately, |
| 00:59:42 |
Don't even think about moving! |
| 00:59:45 |
(speakerblares) |
| 00:59:47 |
- Don't Tase me, bro! |
| 00:59:49 |
No justice, no peace! |
| 00:59:58 |
- We shall not be silenced! |
| 01:00:02 |
Ugly animals of the world, unite! |
| 01:00:05 |
- You have nothing to lose... |
| 01:00:08 |
...buty ourleashes! |
| 01:00:11 |
- We shall not be silenced! |
| 01:00:13 |
- Ow! |
| 01:00:15 |
Tabby is gone! |
| 01:00:17 |
Find Tabby! Tabby's gone! |
| 01:00:20 |
Yikes! Tabby's been nabbied. |
| 01:00:22 |
- Tabby! |
| 01:00:25 |
Sickinger must be running some |
| 01:00:29 |
Oh, the humanity! Tabby! |
| 01:00:32 |
I knowy ou don'twant to, Ace, |
| 01:00:36 |
Now he'll listen to y ou. |
| 01:00:39 |
- You're notlistening! |
| 01:00:42 |
Dr. Sickinger - we saw him creating a distraction at |
| 01:00:47 |
This is a major criminal netwwork. |
| 01:00:50 |
- Tabby the Tabby. |
| 01:00:53 |
- Ting Tang. |
| 01:00:55 |
- Princess. |
| 01:00:57 |
Her Majesty was stolen from a meaningless |
| 01:01:01 |
- Freedom the Hawk. |
| 01:01:05 |
His freedom was taken when he was stolen |
| 01:01:08 |
They even took Snuggles, |
| 01:01:11 |
- They took Snuggles? |
| 01:01:14 |
And? |
| 01:01:15 |
Sickinger's organization |
| 01:01:20 |
Jeez! You're welcome for solving |
| 01:01:23 |
Need me to wipe y our buttfor y ou? |
| 01:01:27 |
So when can I get my mom back? |
| 01:01:30 |
Ten, 20 y ears, I'd say. |
| 01:01:33 |
What?! |
| 01:01:34 |
You see, doorstop, a major investigation like this |
| 01:01:40 |
I think y our mom's guilty, |
| 01:01:44 |
Her case is putting this agency on the map. |
| 01:01:48 |
And that's just the beginning. |
| 01:01:51 |
CSl: Fish and Wildlife. |
| 01:01:55 |
Guess who's gonna play me? |
| 01:01:57 |
Gumby. |
| 01:01:59 |
I didn'twant it to have to come to this, Russell, |
| 01:02:04 |
Ha! |
| 01:02:07 |
Ha! |
| 01:02:08 |
- Out. |
| 01:02:10 |
I am gonna get Sickinger, |
| 01:02:14 |
and show the world |
| 01:02:17 |
Nice hair. |
| 01:02:19 |
(laughing) |
| 01:02:25 |
This used to be the most pristine |
| 01:02:31 |
formerly valued at $100 million. |
| 01:02:35 |
(Ace Jr.) How much is itworth now? |
| 01:02:37 |
(sighs) Substantially less. |
| 01:02:40 |
Please do not touch it. |
| 01:02:44 |
Let's move very carefully |
| 01:02:54 |
I don't think itlooks that bad. |
| 01:02:57 |
You put it back. |
| 01:03:30 |
- Yes? |
| 01:03:34 |
Wait! |
| 01:03:38 |
Who are y ou? |
| 01:03:40 |
Ace Ventura Jr. |
| 01:03:44 |
- You're kidding me, right? |
| 01:03:51 |
I get it! |
| 01:03:56 |
Oh, it's brilliant! Yes, y es. |
| 01:04:01 |
We don'twant to join y our movement. |
| 01:04:03 |
Look, buddy, my mom's in jail |
| 01:04:07 |
so tell us where the panda is |
| 01:04:12 |
If I were going to steal |
| 01:04:16 |
the panda is the last one I'd take. |
| 01:04:20 |
I don't think y ou understand. |
| 01:04:22 |
(plucks guitarstring) |
| 01:04:25 |
- This is the Madagascan Ay e-ay e. |
| 01:04:29 |
- The Proboscis Monkey. |
| 01:04:33 |
Ugh! |
| 01:04:35 |
The Chinese paddlefish. |
| 01:04:41 |
The Marabou Stork. |
| 01:04:45 |
All of them endangered, |
| 01:04:49 |
- You knowwhy? |
| 01:04:53 |
They're hideous. |
| 01:04:56 |
Ugly. |
| 01:04:58 |
- Butt-ugly, actually. |
| 01:05:01 |
(Sickinger) Whoops! |
| 01:05:02 |
Sorry, that one's from vacation. |
| 01:05:05 |
Ace, shoot me now. |
| 01:05:07 |
Lights, lights. |
| 01:05:11 |
And this has what to do with the panda? |
| 01:05:16 |
Well, every thing! |
| 01:05:18 |
We put all of these cute creatures |
| 01:05:21 |
and then we spend insane amounts of money |
| 01:05:27 |
And forwhat? |
| 01:05:29 |
(retches) |
| 01:05:30 |
I started the Pandafanatic website |
| 01:05:38 |
That's all. |
| 01:05:41 |
I didn't kidnap Ting Tang, |
| 01:05:44 |
or any of those other animals. |
| 01:05:48 |
All species of animals, |
| 01:05:51 |
should be treated with the same |
| 01:05:57 |
I think I just busted this case wide open. |
| 01:06:02 |
Amigos, vámonos! |
| 01:06:08 |
I have a car. |
| 01:06:12 |
Ace! So what's going on? |
| 01:06:14 |
Well, here's the plot up until now. |
| 01:06:17 |
Our perpetrator |
| 01:06:20 |
And there's none more famous |
| 01:06:22 |
He play ed the hero unicorn |
| 01:06:26 |
His owners are doing |
| 01:06:29 |
and I got a feeling our thief |
| 01:06:32 |
Punch it. |
| 01:06:37 |
Here's the plan. |
| 01:06:40 |
Ox. |
| 01:06:43 |
You watch Doc. |
| 01:06:47 |
Hi. |
| 01:06:49 |
(Ace Jr.) OK, when we get past this, |
| 01:06:54 |
Whoeverfinds Calypso, call in. |
| 01:06:56 |
We'll stake out the perpetrators |
| 01:07:05 |
I've been looking around here all day. |
| 01:07:07 |
- I can'tfind Calypso. |
| 01:07:11 |
(man) For my next illusion... |
| 01:07:13 |
- Magic show. |
| 01:07:15 |
(crowd shoutss) |
| 01:07:17 |
- (man) Avolunteer? Who wants to be in the show? |
| 01:07:22 |
You. How abouty ou? |
| 01:07:25 |
- No, no, me! Hey, wannabe magic man. |
| 01:07:27 |
- Me! |
| 01:07:31 |
You'll see that there are no mirrors. |
| 01:07:35 |
There are no trap doors. |
| 01:07:37 |
- What's he doing? |
| 01:07:40 |
Ace Irwin Ventura Jr. |
| 01:07:43 |
- Don'tworry, y ou'll be OK. |
| 01:07:48 |
- Are there any back doors? |
| 01:07:51 |
- Are there any mirrors? |
| 01:07:55 |
- All right, go on. |
| 01:07:57 |
- Give him a big hand. |
| 01:07:59 |
Raise the box. |
| 01:08:04 |
Every one, remain calm. |
| 01:08:07 |
One, twwo, three! |
| 01:08:14 |
(crowd cheers) |
| 01:08:22 |
And now... |
| 01:08:24 |
Raise the box, gentlemen, raise the box. I'm |
| 01:08:29 |
And now... Calypso! |
| 01:08:40 |
What the...?! |
| 01:08:43 |
- What happened? |
| 01:08:47 |
Where's Calypso? |
| 01:08:50 |
- Where's Calypso? |
| 01:08:52 |
That kid right there. The volunteer. |
| 01:08:56 |
What, me? No. Where would I be |
| 01:08:59 |
- Where's Calypso? |
| 01:09:03 |
- He's justjoking. |
| 01:09:05 |
- Just get him! |
| 01:09:09 |
- Stop! |
| 01:09:11 |
- (Laura) Calypso's really gone? |
| 01:09:14 |
- (A-Plus) What plan? |
| 01:09:17 |
Strawberry gummy, he loved it. Now he's gonna |
| 01:09:22 |
- Get him! |
| 01:09:25 |
Sickinger, start the car! |
| 01:09:30 |
Here. Dog. |
| 01:09:34 |
- Seatbelts! |
| 01:09:40 |
Where's my horse?! |
| 01:09:45 |
They're getting off the highway |
| 01:09:47 |
That's where all the rich kids from our school live, |
| 01:09:52 |
- My invitation! |
| 01:09:57 |
You're invited to my birthday partyy |
| 01:10:00 |
at3421 Tropicana Avenue. |
| 01:10:05 |
OK, party people. |
| 01:10:09 |
Party? |
| 01:10:11 |
Ox, vámonos! |
| 01:10:18 |
(A-Plus) No, up there. No, wait! |
| 01:10:23 |
- No, stop here! Stop! |
| 01:10:35 |
All right, Laura and I |
| 01:10:38 |
If we're not back by three o'clock, |
| 01:10:44 |
plan B. |
| 01:10:46 |
Sy nchronize watches. |
| 01:10:48 |
Let's go. |
| 01:10:52 |
A red carpet? What is this, an awards show? |
| 01:10:56 |
Hey, y ou, make sure no weirdos get in here. |
| 01:11:00 |
Do y ou knowwhere the back of the line is? |
| 01:11:03 |
How's the wife and kids? |
| 01:11:06 |
- It's very regal. |
| 01:11:09 |
- Thank y ou. |
| 01:11:11 |
How many puberties |
| 01:11:15 |
- All right. |
| 01:11:17 |
Wear the wristband at all times. |
| 01:11:20 |
Whoa. Invite only, kid. |
| 01:11:23 |
- He's my date. |
| 01:11:27 |
Ha ha! You're killing me, Smalls. |
| 01:11:29 |
How abouty ou pick on somebody |
| 01:11:34 |
Now band me. |
| 01:11:36 |
- Gray areas are offlimits. |
| 01:11:39 |
(machine bleeps) |
| 01:11:42 |
- Electronic device. |
| 01:11:45 |
Don't touchy the hair! I haven't been treated this badly |
| 01:12:02 |
- 10,000 shares of Exxon stock! Awesome! |
| 01:12:09 |
- Didn'ty ou bring him a gift? |
| 01:12:13 |
- What? |
| 01:12:15 |
Holy real estate! |
| 01:12:22 |
This place probably has its own zip code. |
| 01:12:24 |
I bety ou we need an exitvisa |
| 01:12:26 |
Best party ever! |
| 01:12:31 |
Get out of the way. |
| 01:12:34 |
Ooh, it's Mr. Big Scary Billionaire Man. |
| 01:12:39 |
"Pirates of the Caribbean" |
| 01:12:43 |
- Don't touch me. |
| 01:12:47 |
He's mean. |
| 01:12:50 |
Young ladies and gentlemen, |
| 01:12:53 |
may I directy our attention to the sky! |
| 01:13:03 |
The Pennington Estate now proudly presents |
| 01:13:08 |
Puty our hands together |
| 01:13:11 |
Pennington, Jr.! |
| 01:13:14 |
(applause) |
| 01:13:17 |
(girls scream) |
| 01:13:21 |
- Wow! |
| 01:13:24 |
(Pennington Jr.) Hi, how are y ou? |
| 01:13:31 |
- How are we gonna get inside? |
| 01:13:34 |
Let's crash into the door |
| 01:13:37 |
- Ace. |
| 01:13:41 |
Hey, Laura, glad y ou could make it. |
| 01:13:43 |
Hi, how are y ou? |
| 01:13:47 |
Well, I asked my fatherfor the best party ever, |
| 01:13:52 |
what a Pennington wants, |
| 01:13:56 |
- So please do not embarrass y ourselves... |
| 01:14:00 |
...by breaking any of the following rules. |
| 01:14:05 |
Gifts in the party bags |
| 01:14:09 |
Do not take any photos. |
| 01:14:13 |
Any one found to be outside |
| 01:14:16 |
will be prosecuted |
| 01:14:20 |
- Have fun, kids! |
| 01:14:24 |
We'll cut the cake in 45 minutes. |
| 01:14:37 |
- Ace! |
| 01:14:41 |
- Down here. |
| 01:14:46 |
Ow! Watch the hair! |
| 01:15:08 |
Will y ou stop spinning? I'm dizzy! |
| 01:15:11 |
Let's go. |
| 01:15:14 |
- In y our dreams, Ace. |
| 01:15:17 |
Oxnard. Big mouth! |
| 01:15:30 |
(Ace Jr.) Follow me. |
| 01:15:44 |
Who's the man? |
| 01:15:52 |
They could have seen y ou! |
| 01:16:06 |
- Why do y ou keep doing that? |
| 01:16:09 |
(sniffs) |
| 01:16:16 |
If Scooby-Doo has taught me any thing, |
| 01:16:22 |
(continues sniffing) |
| 01:16:28 |
Earthy, sweet, a strong bouquet of bamboo |
| 01:16:35 |
Just a touch of wild grass and... butt! |
| 01:16:40 |
I smell panda poop. |
| 01:16:43 |
Excellenty ear. |
| 01:17:00 |
- How did y ou know that? |
| 01:17:12 |
Dookie marks the spot. |
| 01:17:16 |
Or Jimmy Poo. |
| 01:17:18 |
The Penningtons think they're smart, |
| 01:17:22 |
We've caught them brown-footed. |
| 01:17:26 |
OK, Ace, enough of this crap. |
| 01:17:30 |
You said "crap." |
| 01:17:36 |
(man) National Bureau of Fish and Wildlife, |
| 01:17:40 |
Yes, I have an anony mous tip |
| 01:17:43 |
Is he currently on... doodie? |
| 01:17:47 |
(beeping) |
| 01:17:49 |
- Gum! I need a piece of gum. |
| 01:18:05 |
We received an anony mous tip |
| 01:18:08 |
From whom? |
| 01:18:11 |
Anony mous. |
| 01:18:13 |
The tip said that the case of the missing panda cub |
| 01:18:18 |
You're the one who called in the tip? |
| 01:18:22 |
No. He's in big trouble! |
| 01:18:28 |
It proves that my mom |
| 01:18:35 |
I think I understand. |
| 01:18:37 |
This cartoon has taken advantage |
| 01:18:42 |
He's found some cheap |
| 01:18:45 |
snuck it in as a birthday gift, |
| 01:18:49 |
And now he expects y ou to believe that I used |
| 01:18:55 |
Yes! Can y ou believe this guy?! |
| 01:18:59 |
I'm glad I'm not in his shoes! |
| 01:19:03 |
He's been try ing to save his mom |
| 01:19:06 |
Get rid of these. He came by |
| 01:19:11 |
- National Bureau of Fish and Wildlife? |
| 01:19:13 |
I play golf with y our director. Join us for dinner |
| 01:19:18 |
Russell Hollander. |
| 01:19:20 |
How's the panda investigation coming? |
| 01:19:23 |
Hey, Hometown! |
| 01:19:26 |
Arrest this guy, |
| 01:19:29 |
Would y ou excuse me for one second, |
| 01:19:33 |
Call me Pennington. |
| 01:19:36 |
Don'tworry, Ventura. I'm gonna make an arrest. |
| 01:19:41 |
You wanna see out of control? |
| 01:19:45 |
Ha! I win, bedhead. |
| 01:19:48 |
Ex-squeeze me? |
| 01:19:51 |
I'll make sure y ou're locked up until the panda case |
| 01:19:56 |
(beeping) |
| 01:19:58 |
Three o'clock! |
| 01:20:00 |
- What the hell is that? |
| 01:20:04 |
- Sorry! Sorry! |
| 01:20:07 |
- Ah, panda song. |
| 01:20:11 |
Uh-oh. Hello! |
| 01:20:12 |
The sweet sound of a mother panda |
| 01:20:17 |
Oops! We're out of power! |
| 01:20:19 |
- The house is clean! |
| 01:20:22 |
- Check around back! |
| 01:20:27 |
They're small. |
| 01:20:30 |
Turn it up! Go! |
| 01:20:37 |
- Let's go! |
| 01:20:46 |
(Ace Jr.) Over there, point it over there! |
| 01:21:03 |
Congratulations. |
| 01:21:08 |
- Sir, I apologize for the misunderstanding. |
| 01:21:12 |
Silence! |
| 01:21:15 |
Come on, half pint, |
| 01:21:18 |
Ha! |
| 01:21:23 |
Don't go near those doors! |
| 01:21:30 |
(Ace Jr.) Princess! Tabby! |
| 01:21:38 |
Otter! Piggy! |
| 01:21:44 |
Tortoise! Freedom the Hawk! |
| 01:21:48 |
Possum! |
| 01:22:06 |
Ting Tang, I found y ou! |
| 01:22:10 |
Go to the hay stack! |
| 01:22:14 |
Oh, no, y ou don't. |
| 01:22:23 |
Come to me, my jungle friends! |
| 01:22:44 |
(yells) |
| 01:22:50 |
Vámonos, amigos. |
| 01:22:55 |
You had every thing, sir. |
| 01:22:59 |
I decided to start |
| 01:23:03 |
I wanted only the mostfamous pieces. |
| 01:23:06 |
Smooth ride for stolen property, |
| 01:23:08 |
And what a Pennington wants, |
| 01:23:11 |
a Pennington gets. |
| 01:23:14 |
Mr. Pennington, Sr., sir, |
| 01:23:18 |
(various animal noises) |
| 01:23:23 |
(imitates dice rolling) Whack! |
| 01:23:27 |
Yahtzee! |
| 01:23:29 |
What's that on y our tie? |
| 01:23:33 |
I win. |
| 01:23:35 |
- Exit stage left. |
| 01:23:41 |
He's going to jail, |
| 01:23:44 |
Ace, y ou're a really great pet detective. |
| 01:23:48 |
What can I say? |
| 01:23:51 |
Like father, like son. |
| 01:23:55 |
I'm good, I'm good. |
| 01:23:58 |
So when are y ou gonna find my koi fish? |
| 01:24:01 |
I just solved a huge case! |
| 01:24:14 |
Nothing to see here. |
| 01:24:17 |
taking down a powerful billionaire |
| 01:24:21 |
Hey, I knowwhere y ou're going, |
| 01:24:25 |
"ACE JR." |
| 01:24:32 |
Where's he going? |
| 01:24:35 |
Like father, like son. |
| 01:24:44 |
Like father, like son! |
| 01:24:48 |
You guy s wanty our pets or not? |
| 01:25:08 |
(girl) Mr. Chompers! |
| 01:25:12 |
I'm the pet detective here. |
| 01:25:15 |
He wants to be justlike his dad. |
| 01:25:18 |
He wants to be justlike his dad. |
| 01:25:20 |
Cruel, shallow, and selfish. |
| 01:25:22 |
You forgotfilthy rich and egomaniacal. |
| 01:25:25 |
We're Penningtons. |
| 01:25:27 |
Oh, y ou're quite a pair. |
| 01:25:31 |
(laughs) |
| 01:25:32 |
You did notjust make thatlame joke. |
| 01:25:34 |
Oh, I did, sir! And y ou and y our dad |
| 01:25:41 |
You think y ou're a good detective? |
| 01:25:43 |
- Solve this. |
| 01:25:50 |
The fish... |
| 01:25:53 |
is about to disappear. |
| 01:25:59 |
- Greeny! |
| 01:26:01 |
Come on, I need help! |
| 01:26:04 |
Open his mouth, I'm going in. |
| 01:26:06 |
- (Sickinger) No! |
| 01:26:09 |
Couple of y ou |
| 01:26:15 |
Ace, be careful! |
| 01:26:18 |
What the...? Mazel tov. |
| 01:26:21 |
(girl) Easy, Mr. Chompers. |
| 01:26:24 |
That's where my hairdry erwent. |
| 01:26:29 |
His mouth is closing! |
| 01:26:33 |
I think I got him! I got him! |
| 01:26:36 |
(Sickinger) Careful! |
| 01:26:38 |
Ewww! I think I just squeezed his liver! |
| 01:26:45 |
Greeny! |
| 01:26:56 |
No! |
| 01:27:10 |
Way to go, Sparky! |
| 01:27:14 |
Grandpa, what are y ou doing here? |
| 01:27:16 |
I'm taking ten minutes off from retirement |
| 01:27:21 |
- Thanks, Grandpa. |
| 01:27:25 |
I told y ou. |
| 01:27:30 |
Who had the hamster? |
| 01:27:35 |
- Thanks, Ace. |
| 01:27:38 |
Now, Laura, |
| 01:27:43 |
there was something |
| 01:27:47 |
What? |
| 01:27:51 |
Well, it all kind of started |
| 01:27:56 |
Don't be shy, Ace. |
| 01:27:58 |
You like me. |
| 01:28:02 |
No. |
| 01:28:04 |
I have a huge crush on y ou! |
| 01:28:08 |
That's what I just said. |
| 01:28:19 |
I'm good, I'm good now. |
| 01:28:29 |
I am Ace Ventura Jr., |
| 01:28:34 |
And I declare all of y our cases... |
| 01:28:37 |
closed! |
| 01:28:40 |
(cheering) |
| 01:28:45 |
(crowd chantss) Ace! Ace! Ace! |
| 01:29:05 |
Ace Jr... y ou're the man! |
| 01:29:10 |
Actually, y ou knowwhat, Grandpa? |
| 01:29:15 |
Get over here, Laura. |
| 01:29:38 |
- I am so proud of y ou, Ace. |
| 01:29:41 |
- Thank y ou, honey. |
| 01:29:44 |
All righty, then! |
| 01:30:07 |
(# "Ace Is In The House"by Tone Loc) |
