Funny About Love

en
00:01:47 Here you are.
00:01:50 - Make it out to you?
00:01:53 Could you sign "with love"?
00:02:09 - Excuse me.
00:02:14 He's very talented. And funny.
00:02:17 This is a notion
00:02:20 - It matured into this.
00:02:24 No, I'm a paediatrician.
00:02:26 But I am his best friend.
00:02:30 - I'd love to meet him.
00:02:34 I'll see what I can do.
00:02:36 Being a cartoonist
00:02:40 No, that title has to go
00:02:46 Very funny!
00:02:49 Excuse me, excuse me.
00:02:52 Duffy, Duffy. That redhead
00:02:57 - Really wants you to call.
00:03:01 - Don't you want to meet women?
00:03:05 You use a spear gun and I use a net.
00:03:07 I don't fall for every woman
00:03:11 - Do you mind if I use this?
00:03:14 Somebody was Wendy's friend.
00:03:17 Thank you.
00:03:23 - What is this?
00:03:26 You think this is cappuccino?
00:03:29 - Don't start.
00:03:33 No. Could I meet
00:03:36 - This way.
00:03:38 A little emergency just came up.
00:03:45 - It's just a cup of coffee.
00:03:52 Excuse me. Hello!
00:03:55 Who is the Bulgarian bear wrestler
00:03:59 - I'm the Bulgarian bear wrestler.
00:04:03 - Oh?
00:04:07 - He said he hates the coffee.
00:04:11 I said I hate the coughing!
00:04:15 You can breathe in stuff, you get colds.
00:04:19 Oh, thanks. I'm so flattered.
00:04:24 - No, no.
00:04:27 - A nice big cup.
00:04:31 Oh, my. Gosh. Thank you.
00:04:36 Oh, you can just...
00:04:38 - Nice aroma!
00:04:44 - How do you do this?
00:04:48 - Don't tell anyone.
00:04:51 You don't want the word to get out
00:04:55 - Duff, they need you out there.
00:04:59 - What a shame. So do I.
00:05:03 Finish your cappuccino
00:05:06 I would like to talk with you.
00:05:09 - I'll be busy.
00:05:12 No, I'm taking my private jet
00:05:17 Duffy, there are people waiting for you.
00:05:20 Bye.
00:05:35 Last one. Good night, everybody.
00:05:38 Good night. Take care.
00:05:42 - Are you cooking tomorrow night?
00:05:47 Hey! Yo!
00:05:50 Hey! Hey, lady!
00:05:53 Wait a second. Hello, there!
00:06:00 Yeah, once in a while.
00:06:02 I came to see if I could ski you home.
00:06:06 Don't go away. I want to apologise.
00:06:11 Look. Here, taste this, will you?
00:06:15 - Tell me what you think.
00:06:19 - I'm going to St Moritz.
00:06:31 That's pretty good.
00:06:33 - How did you make this?
00:06:35 - Tell me how you did this.
00:06:38 You have an automatic coffee grinder.
00:06:42 You have to have a rich, heavy coffee.
00:06:45 You can't use some dumb
00:06:49 The milk has to be room temperature,
00:06:52 otherwise the machine takes so long
00:06:57 That's all. Coffee's important to me.
00:07:00 - This is really quite amazing.
00:07:05 - Meg. Meg Lloyd.
00:07:10 That's a very short name.
00:07:13 - This party was for you, right?
00:07:16 - Do you like a fuss made over you?
00:07:20 No, I'm from Maine.
00:07:22 We don't need much to keep us happy.
00:07:27 How did you know that I used
00:07:31 - What are you doing on Thursday?
00:07:36 - I have a date.
00:07:38 With you.
00:07:41 Next on Live With Regis And Kathie Lee,
00:07:43 controversial cartoonist Duffy Bergman!
00:07:48 What was the comic strip
00:07:52 The president of the NRA with
00:07:56 "Children kill children."
00:07:58 That was satire.
00:08:00 A hunter with a smoking gun
00:08:04 We feel we were simply
00:08:08 Exercising good taste?
00:08:10 What is that? Is that Alistair Cooke
00:08:15 Is Jesse Helms in good taste?
00:08:17 Are legal assault guns
00:08:22 Polluted fish in the Great Lakes
00:08:25 The only thing I know
00:08:28 is Ben & Jerry's Vanilla Ice Cream
00:08:34 That's good taste!
00:08:37 And they told me he was shy!
00:08:50 - That was terrific.
00:08:52 - Yeah.
00:08:54 Tomorrow I'm going to quit the strip
00:08:58 - Wait a second. You're quitting?
00:09:01 - Did you think I went overboard?
00:09:06 - They told me to be animated.
00:09:10 - But...?
00:09:13 I see that twinkle in your eye.
00:09:16 - What?
00:09:18 - It's nothing.
00:09:20 I just don't get
00:09:24 It seems to me that your strip
00:09:28 - Yeah.
00:09:31 - I do.
00:09:35 - Thanks.
00:09:36 Hatcher supports you 99% of the time.
00:09:39 - 95.
00:09:43 - Right?
00:09:44 I don't get why you want
00:09:48 Unless...? Unless? Unless?
00:09:50 - Never mind.
00:09:52 You're self-indulgent and childish!
00:09:55 Yes, I am.
00:10:30 - Hi.
00:10:32 Thank you.
00:10:37 I made you a little something.
00:10:41 Perfect! I got something for you, too.
00:10:44 - Wait right here.
00:10:48 - Don't look till I say when.
00:10:54 Now look.
00:11:00 - It's wonderful.
00:11:04 Oh, it's... What is it?
00:11:10 Well, I call it
00:11:18 It's great.
00:11:25 This is a great place.
00:11:29 - No, I was married for a while.
00:11:39 That good, huh?
00:11:43 - What happened?
00:11:48 I just couldn't get along with
00:11:55 - That's funny.
00:12:02 Sure, sure! That's all right.
00:12:07 Don't you worry about me,
00:12:12 - Sh, sh.
00:12:15 - I'll make out all right.
00:13:49 Of course. It's perfect.
00:13:58 - Is it my birthday?
00:14:06 Oh, look!
00:14:09 Oh, it's great!
00:15:12 Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me.
00:15:17 Excuse me.
00:16:11 I'm sorry I'm late.
00:16:16 - I know. I called the airport.
00:16:19 I know how important this is to you.
00:16:30 It's OK. Don't worry.
00:16:37 Do you know how cute you look
00:16:45 - Everything was perfect.
00:16:47 Your eggs were right,
00:16:51 I have an idea.
00:16:53 It just hit me.
00:16:55 - Why don't we do it anyway?
00:17:00 - It's 4.15.
00:17:02 Maybe your eggs are on California time.
00:17:05 Is that not possible?
00:17:11 Oh, all right. Come on.
00:17:15 Worst thing that can happen,
00:17:17 we'll have two hours
00:17:21 Work, work, work! All I do is work!
00:17:24 It's a dirty job,
00:17:28 Take off your clothes.
00:17:31 It's nobody's fault, Mr Bergman.
00:17:33 26 million couples a year
00:17:37 - But it can't be nobody's fault.
00:17:41 You're saying it's my fault
00:17:44 - I didn't say it was your fault.
00:17:49 Mr Bergman,
00:17:53 - Yes.
00:17:59 Am I sure I want a child?
00:18:10 Excuse me, Dr Benjamin,
00:18:15 Of course.
00:18:17 - Just let me know when you're ready.
00:18:22 - OK. What's going on?
00:18:26 Come on, come on.
00:18:31 - Come on.
00:18:35 You're scared?
00:18:39 I'm scared that if we have a baby,
00:18:45 and all the holding that I'm used to.
00:18:48 Oh, Duffy.
00:18:50 Oh, honey.
00:18:54 I've got so many kisses
00:18:58 I've got, like, a trillion of them.
00:19:09 Now we'll start on some tests.
00:19:11 Some tests? What kind of tests?
00:19:16 Do I need a number-two pencil?
00:19:20 You have a wonderful,
00:19:23 - She said it.
00:19:26 The woman knows. What's happening?
00:19:29 It's an auditory monitor
00:19:32 Oh, I thought maybe you were lonely.
00:19:35 Would you like to listen to your testicles?
00:19:38 - Who wouldn't?
00:19:41 I just plug the stethoscope
00:19:46 I flick this switch...
00:19:49 Goodness gracious, great balls of fire!
00:19:53 I laughed at love
00:19:56 - Just a joke, Mr Bergman.
00:20:00 - How amusing!
00:20:04 Yes, I feel much better now.
00:20:07 - You want my sperm in this cup?
00:20:11 - Good luck.
00:20:13 Wait a minute!
00:20:17 I've never done this before.
00:20:19 - Come, come, Mr Bergman.
00:20:23 We'll be here all day.
00:20:26 - What do you want, a quart?
00:20:31 - Duff...
00:20:34 Come here, come here.
00:20:38 I think maybe we should try to work
00:20:46 Is this business or pleasure?
00:20:54 Intense heat can kill
00:20:58 - Have you been in a hot tub?
00:21:03 All your sperm
00:21:08 - There he goes again.
00:21:11 All we need to do is lower
00:21:15 - This should do the trick.
00:21:20 - What's this little pocket for?
00:21:24 - You're doing fine.
00:21:27 - Here, climb on.
00:21:34 Come here, come here. Here.
00:21:39 I really think this is the one,
00:21:43 I'm so delighted, Hugo.
00:21:47 She is vague about personal details,
00:21:49 but I think this is normal
00:21:53 Sorry I'm so late. I had to wait
00:21:58 - How did you do?
00:22:01 Why did I ask?
00:22:03 It's excellent!
00:22:06 - Thanks.
00:22:09 - Ma!
00:22:11 Did I offend
00:22:14 Hold your tongue once in a while.
00:22:16 It's only in your cartoons that people
00:22:21 No one's censoring you.
00:22:23 "Hold your tongue!" Did anyone hear
00:22:29 - I was chewing.
00:22:31 - Try a little harder.
00:22:36 - Shut up about babies!
00:22:40 - You're talking to your mother.
00:22:44 - You're darn right.
00:22:47 - Why not?
00:22:51 - Missionary or the usual?
00:22:54 If it's like our usual,
00:22:58 - How about this, Ma? A grandkid!
00:23:02 Wait a second! We can't try
00:23:09 Our staff will show you how to do this.
00:23:13 You give Meg these shots every day
00:23:24 - I'm surprised at how calm I am.
00:23:29 Come on, it's a snap.
00:23:32 - Here we go.
00:23:36 No problem.
00:23:38 Nice and clean.
00:23:48 Almost done, almost done.
00:23:52 Done! I'm sorry, honey.
00:23:55 - Did it hurt?
00:23:59 - One more time.
00:24:07 This is as far as you go, Mr Bergman.
00:24:17 - See you in a little while.
00:24:19 Sure. Don't you worry about me.
00:24:23 Go on, have a good time.
00:24:54 There's your cup, Mr Bergman.
00:24:56 Turn on the red light when you're
00:26:39 Oh, I'm sorry!
00:26:43 - Is that the July issue?
00:26:58 Honey, help me.
00:27:00 Meg, help me, please.
00:27:59 I got an egg.
00:28:02 How does it look?
00:28:05 It's good.
00:28:12 You must have been a beautiful baby
00:28:20 You must have been a wonderful child
00:28:27 When you were only startin'
00:28:30 To go to kindergarten
00:28:33 I bet you drove the little boys wild
00:28:39 And when it came
00:28:47 You must have shown
00:28:52 I can see the judges' eyes
00:28:56 As they handed you the prize
00:29:00 I bet you made the cutest bow
00:29:06 Oh! You must have been
00:29:13 'Cause, baby, look at you now
00:29:37 I made you a batch of cappuccino.
00:29:39 - Batch?
00:29:41 Wow, thanks.
00:29:59 Yow! This is it! This is the best
00:30:04 - On a scale from one to ten?
00:30:09 - Really?
00:30:11 What's the matter with your eye?
00:30:15 - Nothing.
00:30:17 - I have a lash caught in my eye.
00:30:20 I can't believe you're lying to me.
00:30:24 Jesus! I can't even make
00:30:29 - I can't make anything.
00:30:32 What's going on? What's happening?
00:30:36 I got my period, Duff.
00:30:42 I'm sorry, honey. I'm sorry.
00:30:46 - I'm sorry.
00:30:49 You've got to stop beating yourself up
00:30:54 - Let's just forget about kids.
00:30:57 I've always had a thing about kids.
00:31:02 Well, let's just postpone it,
00:31:06 Let's think about our careers.
00:31:09 Easy for you to say. You have a career.
00:31:12 Didn't The Village Voice
00:31:16 What am I in? I'm in the kitchen
00:31:21 - I'm not even good at it.
00:31:25 Are you crazy?
00:31:28 You're the only American chef
00:31:32 I see you one day
00:31:35 - I really do! What about...?
00:31:39 No twitching. What about the guy who
00:31:43 Was he looking for no talent?
00:31:47 - You mean Café Pretentious Name?
00:31:52 Do you know how big a commitment
00:31:57 Six, sometimes seven days a week.
00:31:59 We couldn't fit sex in, let alone a baby.
00:32:02 - So we'll wait.
00:32:05 Tell him you'll take the job.
00:32:07 - I don't think I can do it.
00:32:11 Say I said that you make the best
00:32:16 - It's twitching.
00:32:20 I think we blew a fuse.
00:32:31 This is what I'm talking about.
00:32:34 How could you do this?
00:32:37 Don't you remember working for him,
00:32:41 I remember being on Columbus Avenue
00:32:45 That's a reason to destroy his life?
00:32:49 - You shouldn't work so hard.
00:32:53 - Vivian has three adorable kids.
00:32:58 He's not a little shit.
00:33:02 I don't believe this!
00:33:07 Meg's been trying to get this stove
00:33:11 I want to tell her
00:33:15 Go ahead. I'll be here
00:33:18 - What is this for? The bedroom?
00:33:24 Would you move?
00:33:26 Hello, it's me, your husband.
00:33:28 Have you got a pen or a pencil handy?
00:33:32 Calleverde Brothers, lmporters.
00:33:40 Yeah. 'Cause that's what it says
00:33:44 What have we been searching for
00:33:48 I'm sure of it,
00:33:53 - It wasn't my fault!
00:34:02 - Are you OK?
00:34:05 I just can't get over the way she...
00:34:08 Well, I guess she died
00:34:12 - Like Wile E Coyote?
00:34:19 Duff...
00:34:35 That was a very nice talk
00:34:40 What did I say?
00:34:42 How Mom was always in a hurry,
00:34:45 She managed to get death over with
00:34:50 - It was good.
00:34:57 Jakey! Oh, honey.
00:35:01 Roger, hey, come with me, buddy.
00:35:04 Oh, it's OK, honey. It's OK.
00:35:07 Don't cry, don't cry.
00:35:10 Please! It's just water.
00:35:14 Please don't cry.
00:35:34 Oh, Duff.
00:35:46 I know, I know.
00:35:51 Four, five, six, seven,
00:36:04 Roger, you're a little shit!
00:36:06 Roger, honey, come here
00:36:13 The hobgoblins came down the hill
00:36:19 At the bottom of the lake there lived a...
00:36:23 - Bear.
00:36:27 With a lot of fantastic
00:36:31 and a great big spear gun
00:36:34 - Junk.
00:36:37 - The junk?
00:36:41 That's right. You're right, Jakey.
00:36:45 You are the most incredible kidlet,
00:36:50 Are you?
00:36:52 - Oh, he is!
00:36:55 - What?
00:37:00 I want us to try and have a baby again.
00:37:05 - What?
00:37:08 I want you to be happy and do exactly
00:37:13 I said, "We can wait." But I'm a liar.
00:37:17 I lied. I should be
00:37:22 Whoa, wait a second, Duffy. I can't.
00:37:26 I can't go through all that again
00:37:31 How many more years do you think
00:37:35 OK, we'll do it.
00:37:37 You don't mean that.
00:37:41 No, I do. I just...
00:37:46 - I don't know.
00:37:49 - They said it was very possible.
00:37:54 - OK, we'll try again.
00:37:58 - I'll hate you, but we can try.
00:38:02 That's the only thing I care about.
00:38:14 - Your own champagne.
00:38:17 - And your own...
00:38:21 - Sotto Voce.
00:38:24 - Really?
00:38:27 - Behave, Ellis.
00:38:31 You must stick to the Sotto Voce menu.
00:38:35 - It's a deal.
00:38:40 Happy Fourth of July.
00:38:49 - Hello?
00:38:54 I thought you'd be home by now.
00:38:56 Something's come up, honey.
00:39:01 Yes, you do. Ellis is one
00:39:05 He's editor of Glare Magazine.
00:39:07 Go ahead. Ellis Hayden.
00:39:10 Well, anyway,
00:39:14 He's making me head chef.
00:39:18 It happened, just like you said.
00:39:22 I thought we were celebrating
00:39:26 with our own birth thing.
00:39:29 Yeah, we were, honey, but...
00:39:31 I'm ovulating.
00:39:37 OK, you're right.
00:39:41 I'll just ease my way out of here.
00:39:46 Wait a minute. You only get
00:39:52 We've got a million nights like this
00:39:55 Honey, you'd tell me if it wasn't OK.
00:39:58 Sure, sure, it's all right.
00:40:00 - Listen...
00:40:04 Well, I like you very much.
00:40:06 - Bye.
00:40:33 At 12 o'clock, Claire's bringing lunch.
00:40:38 - Hi.
00:40:41 Come on in.
00:40:45 I have some documents for you to sign
00:40:50 Couldn't this have waited
00:40:53 I'm sorry, dear,
00:40:58 - What kind of plans?
00:41:02 You're seeing someone?
00:41:04 - That's right.
00:41:06 Mom's dead.
00:41:09 Show a little patience.
00:41:13 I wouldn't be concerned, Viv.
00:41:18 Well, I guess it's all right
00:41:25 I'm sorry, honey,
00:41:30 Going away? Claus von Bülow didn't
00:41:35 Her name is Claire.
00:41:39 - Are you seeing anybody else?
00:41:43 - Is that so surprising?
00:41:47 I pictured you taking
00:41:51 Kids, I found I don't like living alone.
00:41:57 I hate it.
00:42:00 - Hire a maid.
00:42:05 You sleep with her?
00:42:10 Duffy, I know it's hard for you to accept,
00:42:16 Because you're happy
00:42:19 Hi. Oh, I'm sorry, Emil.
00:42:27 - Emil? Emil!
00:42:32 Say hello to Duffy and Vivian.
00:42:39 Kids, this is Claire Raskin.
00:42:42 - Hello.
00:42:44 Hi. So, have you two
00:42:50 Till the birth of our idiot child.
00:42:53 - Then we were forced to break up.
00:42:59 I did. Duffy is my son.
00:43:04 - I'm Duffy.
00:43:07 So you're not married?
00:43:09 No, they are. Vivian's married to Steve.
00:43:14 Duffy is married to Meg.
00:43:18 OK. Now I've got it straight.
00:43:22 For a conversation like this,
00:43:33 It's almost like a curse, you know,
00:43:39 We've been overbooked
00:43:42 These people are
00:43:45 Oh, and did I tell you?
00:43:49 The maître d' got offered a new job.
00:43:52 I shouldn't be taking this week
00:43:56 What do you mean, this week?
00:44:00 A whole fertile period.
00:44:04 I can't run a restaurant
00:44:07 Last month, I thought we agreed to try.
00:44:10 - We agreed not to push for a baby.
00:44:15 I didn't know
00:44:18 - So we can't have a baby?
00:44:22 You said,
00:44:26 You convinced me
00:44:28 - I didn't think it was either/or.
00:44:33 When is it good timing? You tell me!
00:44:35 I have a really great idea.
00:44:39 - Is that what you think I want?
00:44:45 It's hot in here! Who buys a car
00:44:51 I'm in traffic. You going to buy me
00:44:56 - Yes!
00:45:04 I don't want you to do what I want.
00:45:08 You're acting as if you don't ever
00:45:12 Oh, God! I can't believe
00:45:19 Didn't I try for three years?
00:45:21 Didn't I fail for three years? Do you
00:45:26 Month after month, nothing.
00:45:29 When I finally succeed at something,
00:45:33 Let's forget about doctors, hormones
00:45:38 Sure! When I suggested adopting,
00:45:42 Now you want to adopt? Bullshit!
00:45:45 I don't want to adopt,
00:45:48 - We both want a baby, but we can't.
00:45:53 Let's wait
00:45:56 A baby in a Republican administration
00:46:01 Let's wait 30 years and make the front
00:46:06 Between "Ape gives birth to human"
00:46:10 there'll be "87-year-old father
00:46:17 I told you! Now I've got no radiator.
00:46:20 Get out of the cab.
00:46:32 May you have a child
00:46:36 you have visited on to me today!
00:46:38 We don't have a child and he's already
00:46:43 What do you have to do
00:46:47 What? What? Oh, God! I'm sorry.
00:46:52 You know me. I always go too far.
00:46:56 Why are we fighting all the time?
00:46:59 Some couples don't communicate.
00:47:03 Then why are we both so unhappy?
00:47:49 - Why are you giving me that?
00:47:53 - I can't make cappuccino.
00:47:57 I want you to have it.
00:48:06 Excuse me.
00:48:15 - Hello?
00:48:17 - I'm calling about your speech...
00:48:22 - Come back for me.
00:48:25 Listen, I'm sort of in the middle
00:48:30 - Can we talk another time?
00:48:34 Thanks.
00:48:42 So this is it? We're getting separated
00:48:51 - Maybe you can have one now.
00:48:55 It's not so much fun
00:48:58 - It violates every rule in the book.
00:49:06 I'll call you.
00:50:28 You're right. Here you go.
00:50:32 - Could I have some grapes?
00:50:36 - Here you go.
00:50:48 You do this on all your first dates?
00:50:51 You bring a friend
00:50:54 Here he comes. I'll see you later.
00:50:58 I should never have
00:51:01 Forget it. You need to get out,
00:51:05 I tried. It just didn't work.
00:51:07 - What did you talk about?
00:51:11 And nobody jumped overboard?
00:51:16 You've got to start having fun.
00:51:20 I tell you what, I know this girl.
00:51:23 We'll drive out to the Amish country
00:51:27 I have to speak at a dumb convention.
00:51:30 - What convention?
00:51:33 A DG convention?
00:51:37 About 500, I suppose.
00:51:39 - How many men?
00:51:41 That sounds like a really dumb idea.
00:51:44 Duff, these are the same girls who
00:51:49 the most beautiful girls God created.
00:52:12 Duffy Bergman? No, right?
00:52:17 - Duffy Bergman?
00:52:20 - Hop in.
00:52:22 - Great.
00:52:28 Look out!
00:52:32 Trust me. I'm from New York.
00:52:36 A secretary gave me the wrong time
00:52:40 - I don't mind stopping.
00:52:44 - I'll drive with my legs crossed.
00:52:48 Were you abandoned at birth and
00:52:52 You sound like the guy I'd expect
00:52:56 Funny. I happen to be the author.
00:52:59 The fact is you are
00:53:02 for the resurgence of
00:53:06 Well, thanks. Give a little credit to
00:53:31 Do you identify with any character?
00:53:34 There's something of me
00:53:37 I think the best parts are in the women.
00:53:40 I meant metaphorically.
00:54:01 Yi, yi, yi. God, who is it?
00:54:07 I was going to slip the schedule
00:54:12 - What are you doing up so late?
00:54:16 - And you haven't a clue what to say?
00:54:21 What's the problem?
00:54:22 They want me to talk about
00:54:27 My history with women is a disaster.
00:54:31 - You're talking to me.
00:54:34 This is talking to a friend.
00:54:36 OK, what about the characters in your
00:54:41 That's political satire.
00:54:44 I could never relate to women
00:54:48 especially not with the DGs.
00:54:50 I always thought of them
00:54:54 Well, there you go. They'll love that.
00:55:11 And so they suggested relationships.
00:55:14 I said, "I'm not qualified
00:55:18 "I don't have one any more."
00:55:21 So they suggested mothers.
00:55:26 I suggested, "What about self-pity?"
00:55:30 That's something I understand.
00:55:33 I could get my teeth into that.
00:55:40 Thank you for just being here,
00:55:43 for walking this earth,
00:55:50 Because I'm weak, lonely, self-pitying...
00:55:58 ...in other words, a man.
00:56:03 And I couldn't live without you,
00:56:43 Duffy!
00:57:08 Did you get lucky?
00:57:10 Keep your eyes on the road!
00:57:14 You didn't strike me as a guy
00:57:19 I'm the kind of guy who wants
00:57:24 and have babies and settle down.
00:57:26 Don't get so defensive. I want
00:57:32 And, what, I'm too old?
00:57:35 Not old, but you got
00:57:41 For girls, the older you get,
00:57:46 - Do you have your life planned out?
00:57:51 - Good luck.
00:57:57 Do you want to go to a motel for
00:58:05 Too late. See?
00:58:16 For you, nice lady,
00:58:19 I got lemon pie, cookies, brownies...
00:58:23 OK, I'll have the...
00:58:26 I got cherry cheesecake,
00:58:30 Oh, boy.
00:58:36 I got coffee regular, I got decaf,
00:58:43 He's got cappuccino. I'm just going
00:58:49 Do you have herbal tea?
00:58:55 Meg, Emil and I talk about you
00:59:02 We're worried about you.
00:59:05 Claire, I'm fine.
00:59:07 Really, I'm just having a hard time
00:59:13 like what tea to drink,
00:59:15 what blouse to wear, what I should
00:59:22 - You mean Duffy?
00:59:29 You know, I just think this is so wrong.
00:59:33 I just find it so hard to imagine
00:59:38 Well, what's so hard? We're not.
00:59:47 Claire, I'm sorry. It's just...
00:59:51 I miss him.
00:59:53 I love the son of a bitch,
00:59:58 We all know that Duffy is a great talker,
01:00:03 Everything became
01:00:07 He was looking at me like I was
01:00:13 "What's my name?" "Baby."
01:00:17 "What time is it, what day, what year?"
01:00:21 Jesus! I wanted to punch his face in.
01:00:24 Meg, he loves you.
01:00:28 Yes, well, I like him very much.
01:00:32 No, I mean he really loves you!
01:00:37 God, it sounds so great
01:00:42 I guess I really needed to hear him
01:00:48 instead of all that bullshit.
01:00:59 - Are you sick?
01:01:04 - Are you?
01:01:07 - See?
01:01:11 - What do you have?
01:01:17 - Duffy.
01:01:22 Doctor Hugo'll make you all better.
01:01:25 I'll tell you what's wrong. Nothing.
01:01:28 What? I've got a burning inside
01:01:33 I'm listless, I have no appetite,
01:01:37 What kind of a doctor are you?
01:01:41 You lost your mother, your marriage
01:01:46 - Hugo, I want a baby.
01:01:51 You understand, Hugo,
01:01:54 that I'm a little bit scared
01:02:03 Talk to Meg.
01:02:07 Talk to her.
01:02:14 Sotto Voce, this is Kathryn.
01:02:20 One moment, please.
01:02:23 Meg, it's Duffy for you.
01:02:31 - Duffy?
01:02:33 Hi. Where are you?
01:02:36 I'm at home. Can you talk?
01:02:39 Well, I'm in the middle of something.
01:02:42 Listen, I've been doing some thinking.
01:02:46 I just got back from a trip.
01:02:52 I was just wondering if we could
01:02:57 and maybe, you know,
01:03:03 Look, this isn't a good time
01:03:07 Well, also I was thinking that maybe
01:03:13 Maybe I was wrong.
01:03:20 Sure, yeah, that sounds great, Duff.
01:03:22 This is really a bad time for me.
01:03:26 - What is this?
01:03:29 Did you have to hire
01:03:33 Couldn't you get some hit men
01:03:37 Marcus is doing it as a favour.
01:03:40 Not to me. The whole thing
01:03:43 We get a book on divorce
01:03:47 - It's not that simple, Duffy.
01:03:51 - I did?
01:03:54 Designer lettuce! Franchises! What
01:03:59 Meggie, Al Costello is here
01:04:03 - Just a second.
01:04:05 - Why?
01:04:08 Is this making it all too real for you?
01:04:11 We had a real marriage and
01:04:15 - Over?
01:04:19 - Where to?
01:04:22 Lawyer, singular,
01:04:25 I'm going to do your lawyer a favour.
01:04:28 - What are you doing?
01:04:32 Take something on account.
01:04:34 By the way, congratulations on
01:04:39 It's a great name. All of this purple
01:04:58 - Hi.
01:05:00 - Ready on four.
01:05:03 Do you enjoy acid rain?
01:05:06 - I take it your answer is yes.
01:05:12 Duffy Bergman of Duffy's World.
01:05:18 - What a kidder.
01:05:25 - Duffy? Hi.
01:05:29 - I work here.
01:05:33 Not bad. Actually, good.
01:05:38 - Against your will?
01:05:40 Well, sort of. It means moving
01:05:44 I need to maintain a level
01:05:48 So, how's the rest of your life?
01:05:52 There isn't any rest of my life
01:05:55 Really? Shame!
01:05:57 - Daph, are you ready to go?
01:06:02 How about I buy you dinner some time?
01:06:08 How's tomorrow night?
01:06:11 I have this Girl Scout meeting...
01:06:15 I'm just kidding.
01:06:20 - Good night.
01:06:24 - All right.
01:06:28 So, anyway, the day after I was born,
01:06:34 to cover the war
01:06:37 and he doesn't even want to go.
01:06:40 But my mom pushes him. You know,
01:06:45 Whoa, hold on!
01:06:48 His first night in Vietnam,
01:06:51 - That's awful.
01:06:57 - He lit a joint near an ammo dump.
01:07:05 She seemed to have nice tits, that girl.
01:07:12 - Really?
01:07:15 You were staring at her tits.
01:07:18 I was not. What are you talking about?
01:07:22 - Right. What are you? A tit man?
01:07:29 I'm interested in what
01:07:35 You seemed interested in her tits,
01:07:39 - Yes, they were.
01:07:43 I'm not. I'm interested
01:07:50 So these don't excite you?
01:07:52 Hey, hey, hey! Good night, Fred.
01:07:57 Good night, Mr Bergman.
01:08:16 So you are interested
01:08:21 In case they want me in the Raiders.
01:08:38 No, no! Oh, no!
01:08:59 Doctor! Doctor!
01:09:22 Take this! Take this thing!
01:09:51 - No more. I can't. I'm too old.
01:09:55 Help an old man go to bed.
01:09:59 I want a little milk
01:10:25 - Bravo! Bravo!
01:10:31 - Verdi drives her crazy.
01:10:35 Hey, what a coincidence.
01:10:40 I don't know if you know this,
01:10:43 but Emil and I came here
01:10:48 This place is very special to us.
01:10:51 We wanted to come here tonight
01:10:54 Speed it up.
01:10:56 Claire, I'm trying
01:11:00 - Break what, Daddy?
01:11:07 Shotgun? You have to get married?
01:11:14 I'd say a toast was in order.
01:11:21 OK.
01:11:23 Here's to Emil Thomas Bergman,
01:11:32 and... l'm sorry,
01:11:36 Joke. Just a joke.
01:11:39 Joke, joke.
01:11:43 Here's to my dad and Claire.
01:11:48 Bon voyage.
01:12:15 What do you have against Claire?
01:12:18 I don't have anything against her.
01:12:22 Well, I don't know, I like her.
01:12:26 You and Meg. Meg liked her, too.
01:12:31 It sounds like I would've liked Meg.
01:12:34 You would have.
01:12:38 You never told me why you broke up.
01:12:41 That's a long, and I don't know
01:12:46 Then make it interesting.
01:12:50 First, Meg wanted to have a baby.
01:12:52 We couldn't do it. We tried everything,
01:12:57 Then my mother died. All of a sudden,
01:13:02 Not that we could have
01:13:05 but all I could think about
01:13:08 That's when we broke up.
01:13:14 I didn't realise
01:13:27 Ugh, who made this?
01:13:29 - Did you make this?
01:13:32 - What's the matter with it?
01:13:36 And you forgot the cinnamon. Good
01:13:42 Chocolatey?
01:13:44 Yeah. I don't know
01:13:51 Did you brush your teeth and say
01:14:41 - How did you get these seats?
01:14:46 - It was worth it. What a birthday!
01:14:49 The Knicks and Madison Square
01:15:02 Duffy!
01:15:05 I'm going upstate now.
01:15:09 - Daphne, are you looking for me?
01:15:11 - Great game!
01:15:14 - Meet my friend, Duffy Bergman.
01:15:17 How do you do? This is the best
01:15:23 - One more surprise to go. Patrick?
01:15:29 You're kidding. This is incredible!
01:15:32 I didn't even know
01:15:36 - It's yours, dummy.
01:15:42 - Thanks.
01:15:46 I owe you one.
01:15:51 I've been thinking.
01:15:53 When this one's born,
01:15:55 and I think it's a girl,
01:15:59 which I saw in Delta Of Venus
01:16:02 We should have another one right away,
01:16:05 get through the nursery phase
01:16:09 Maybe I should take that job in LA.
01:16:14 That means private schools.
01:16:19 That means Hollywood for you,
01:16:23 It's great money,
01:16:27 Anyway,
01:16:31 All of which is just a prelude
01:16:36 where we can all just kick back
01:16:42 and watch the snow fall.
01:16:45 You can write another musical,
01:16:51 - What can I do?
01:17:02 - Good.
01:17:09 Keep it coming.
01:17:24 All right, we can take it up.
01:17:32 Duffy, there's a problem.
01:17:35 - Hold it, Charlie.
01:17:38 Don't worry.
01:17:42 Don't get scared.
01:17:44 Don't get scared. I'm going to make it
01:17:50 Don't cry.
01:18:01 - Is she OK?
01:18:08 It just wasn't meant to be
01:18:21 Thanks.
01:18:55 Hi.
01:19:07 Where are you going?
01:19:09 - LA. I'm taking the job out there.
01:19:14 - Yeah.
01:19:18 - You'll move to LA?
01:19:22 I'll buy a jeep for all the snow.
01:19:25 - We can watch the seasons changing.
01:19:28 What's going on?
01:19:34 Let's face it. The baby just happened.
01:19:37 We didn't mean for it to happen.
01:19:41 It made everything more serious
01:19:47 We were both
01:19:50 You think I was doing
01:19:53 Then why else are you with me?
01:19:58 Well, because I think
01:20:05 I think that I have
01:20:10 And... the sex is something...
01:20:17 ...a little out of the ordinary,
01:20:21 I take partial credit for that,
01:20:23 but you get points for
01:20:27 and regularity.
01:20:31 And I think that you're
01:20:39 Girl. Wo... Girl.
01:20:43 In spite of all this craziness that
01:20:49 We like doing the same things.
01:20:54 What's going...? Hey, hey!
01:20:58 Come here. No, no. Come on.
01:21:02 Was it something I said?
01:21:07 - I'll take it right back.
01:21:11 You're not. No, you're
01:21:16 It was all good times. I never hurt you.
01:21:22 I don't know what you're saying.
01:21:27 You never had to take me seriously.
01:21:30 I always take you seriously. I do.
01:21:37 You have to know I'm crazy about you.
01:21:43 Then why, Duffy, when I asked you
01:21:49 why didn't you say,
01:22:13 - Enjoy your dinner.
01:22:17 - Excuse me just one moment, please.
01:22:21 Sir? Excuse me. Excuse me.
01:22:25 Sir! Excuse me.
01:22:29 - Sir, can I help you?
01:22:33 - Meg who? Excuse me.
01:22:37 Sir, our chef is Antonio Lucchesi.
01:22:42 - What happened to Meg?
01:22:45 But whatever happened to her,
01:22:50 Grazie. Buonasera.
01:22:53 Thank you.
01:23:06 - That was great.
01:23:09 - I think we have just enough time.
01:23:18 Excellent.
01:23:34 Mazel tov!
01:23:44 Are you all right, Duff?
01:24:11 - This is great. It's terrific.
01:24:16 Excuse me.
01:24:19 - It is you!
01:24:21 You know, I wasn't sure.
01:24:26 Look at you! My gosh!
01:24:28 You look... whoo!
01:24:32 - Thanks. So do you.
01:24:36 Dad didn't say anything. I didn't
01:24:41 Neither did I. I thought
01:24:45 - But you're not there any more.
01:24:49 - How did you know?
01:24:54 Yeah, well, anyway. I opened
01:24:58 Your own place? Nobody told me that.
01:25:02 - Meg's.
01:25:05 What an original name!
01:25:10 - Out of the phone book.
01:25:15 That's wonderful.
01:25:19 Yeah. I guess so.
01:25:24 - And they let you make apple crisp?
01:25:30 Yeah, well. Sorry. I didn't mean...
01:25:33 - What's going on here?
01:25:36 - I'm so glad you could make it.
01:25:40 - Thanks for coming.
01:25:43 This is your request.
01:25:46 - Go on, Pops.
01:25:52 It's going to work!
01:25:54 You know the old saying.
01:25:58 Bet you a dollar.
01:26:01 You're on.
01:26:05 I think that...
01:26:08 - I think I should get going.
01:26:11 I know, but there's this person
01:26:17 - Oh, oh, sorry.
01:26:23 Why don't I explain it
01:26:27 Sure, sure. That's all right.
01:26:31 Don't worry about me. I'll be fine.
01:26:34 I always loved
01:26:37 My Jimmy Stewart.
01:26:40 - Thanks.
01:26:50 Maybe we'll see each other some time
01:26:57 Yeah, that sounds great.
01:27:01 I'll see you.
01:27:12 You owe me a dollar.
01:27:26 Gosh, look at all the cake
01:27:30 Did you taste it?
01:27:32 - It's awfully cinnamony.
01:27:37 Who cares?
01:27:43 You know something? I haven't been
01:27:49 What do you mean?
01:27:54 I mean I've acted
01:27:58 Yeah.
01:28:03 - You've made Dad so happy.
01:28:08 I just want to tell you that I'm sorry.
01:28:13 I want to tell you that.
01:28:17 And that... I think he's awfully lucky
01:28:23 I hope he doesn't let you get away.
01:28:35 - Sorry.
01:28:40 - This was really some wedding.
01:28:44 I promise you that.
01:28:46 You know, I thought it was
01:28:52 Well, I'd like to take
01:28:56 I ran into her at Union Square Market.
01:28:59 She asked if you were definitely
01:29:03 I said, "Of course."
01:29:07 So I guess you could say
01:29:11 - She came to see me?
01:29:19 Would you excuse me?
01:29:32 Taxi!
01:29:37 - Stop, I'll get out here.
01:30:17 - The food here is really good.
01:30:22 Yes, I know.
01:30:24 - Good.
01:30:28 Thanks.
01:30:32 - Oh, hi.
01:30:38 - What?
01:30:42 I see.
01:30:47 Meg, honey, I love you.
01:30:51 I've always loved you.
01:30:53 I've never loved anyone else,
01:30:57 - Excuse me.
01:31:00 If you don't love me,
01:31:04 - Get out of the way!
01:31:06 - Excuse me.
01:31:11 Meg, this is the last time, I promise.
01:31:14 - I know I shouldn't have pushed you.
01:31:18 I know I should never have let you go.
01:31:21 I know I should have said this
01:31:25 Look at all the stuff I know!
01:31:29 There's another thing I know.
01:31:35 But I need you.
01:31:37 I just want you.
01:31:41 We belong together.
01:31:46 - I know.
01:31:48 Yeah, I know.
01:31:57 Gosh, I'm sorry.
01:31:59 - I have to go back to work.
01:32:05 - What is this?
01:32:16 You mean...
01:32:18 You mean this could be my son?
01:32:25 I don't know. That's up to him.
01:32:34 Where's Mommy?
01:32:43 Excuse me. Folks, this is my family.
01:32:53 You're my favourite person
01:32:59 You get one, too.
01:33:02 I don't know how good
01:33:06 What are you worried about?
01:33:11 That's true.
01:33:13 I can see the judges' eyes
01:33:16 As they handed you the prize
01:33:20 I bet you made the cutest bow
01:33:26 Oh! You must have been
01:33:33 'Cause, baby, look at you now