|
Hamlet 2
|
| 00:00:32 |
To act is to live. |
| 00:00:35 |
Are you tired? Overweight? |
| 00:00:37 |
Lacking energy? |
| 00:00:39 |
Do you wish you could look |
| 00:00:42 |
By unlocking the power of natural juice |
| 00:00:45 |
with Jack La Lanne's Power Juicer. |
| 00:00:48 |
We juiced with this other juicer, |
| 00:00:50 |
and look how much work it takes, |
| 00:00:51 |
feeding the small chute. |
| 00:00:54 |
To act is to breathe the poet's breath. |
| 00:01:19 |
It is to embody the dreams of man. |
| 00:01:23 |
To live as an actor is to live a dream. |
| 00:01:29 |
I'm having a herpes outbreak right now. |
| 00:01:32 |
But you'd never know it. |
| 00:01:36 |
Thanks, Herpecol. |
| 00:01:39 |
But dreams are ephemeral, |
| 00:01:44 |
So we must ask, |
| 00:01:47 |
where do dreams go to die? |
| 00:02:03 |
Hey, look, I'm sorry, okay? |
| 00:02:06 |
Hey, well, why don't I take you out |
| 00:02:12 |
Give me your number. |
| 00:02:15 |
You want my number? |
| 00:02:16 |
Which number do you want, George? |
| 00:02:18 |
You see, right there. I like |
| 00:02:23 |
For instance, ten. That's how |
| 00:02:28 |
You got a baby girl? |
| 00:02:30 |
Sexy, huh? |
| 00:02:31 |
How about six? |
| 00:02:32 |
That's how old my other daughter is. |
| 00:02:34 |
Eight is the age of my son. |
| 00:02:36 |
Two is how many times I've |
| 00:02:39 |
Sixteen is the number of |
| 00:02:42 |
And I'm guessing zero is the number |
| 00:02:45 |
of times you're gonna call me. |
| 00:03:00 |
Hey, the reviews are in. |
| 00:03:04 |
Read them quickly. |
| 00:03:08 |
"Are Dana Marschz's |
| 00:03:10 |
"popular Hollywood |
| 00:03:13 |
"or is he just profoundly confused? |
| 00:03:17 |
"To be fair, |
| 00:03:18 |
"this year's Erin Brockovich |
| 00:03:22 |
"It manages to make |
| 00:03:24 |
"of Mississippi Burning look |
| 00:03:27 |
What about the acting? |
| 00:03:28 |
"It is perhaps best not |
| 00:03:31 |
"In the theater, actors endeavor |
| 00:03:34 |
"Rand Posin and Epiphany |
| 00:03:36 |
"and wave their arms like |
| 00:03:39 |
That's enough! |
| 00:03:42 |
Every trimester we |
| 00:03:46 |
What's "fisted"? |
| 00:03:47 |
What? |
| 00:03:49 |
I have so much anger. |
| 00:03:51 |
I feel like I've been raped. |
| 00:03:53 |
In the face! |
| 00:04:00 |
What do I need to do to please you? |
| 00:04:02 |
Is that the purpose of your plays? |
| 00:04:04 |
To please me? |
| 00:04:06 |
I put a lot of myself into my work. |
| 00:04:07 |
Would it kill you to say something |
| 00:04:11 |
Have you ever considered doing a play |
| 00:04:13 |
that wasn't originally a popular movie? |
| 00:04:17 |
No. Why? |
| 00:04:18 |
Do you think I should be |
| 00:04:23 |
That wasn't what I had in |
| 00:04:29 |
You know, there's so much I |
| 00:04:31 |
that sometimes it overwhelms me. |
| 00:04:35 |
I gotta go clean the hamster cages. |
| 00:04:37 |
Are you going to be all right? |
| 00:04:39 |
Yes, I'm great. |
| 00:04:41 |
Okay. |
| 00:04:42 |
Yeah, you take care. |
| 00:04:46 |
Thanks for the truth |
| 00:04:56 |
Morning, Gary. |
| 00:04:58 |
Morning, Dana. |
| 00:04:59 |
Top of the morning to you. |
| 00:05:01 |
It's a really kickass sunny |
| 00:05:05 |
Great observation there, Gary. |
| 00:05:06 |
We live in Tucson. |
| 00:05:09 |
Can I talk to you, please, privately? |
| 00:05:11 |
Sure, squishy. |
| 00:05:13 |
Excuse us. |
| 00:05:14 |
Oh, yeah. |
| 00:05:16 |
Sorry, I'm a little |
| 00:05:19 |
I'm working on an original play. |
| 00:05:21 |
It's about my childhood. |
| 00:05:23 |
Anyway, I know we're broke |
| 00:05:26 |
but I swear to God, I can't |
| 00:05:29 |
I'm gonna go back to |
| 00:05:31 |
No, no, I will not |
| 00:05:33 |
I was a dealer, not a pusher. |
| 00:05:37 |
It's just until I, |
| 00:05:39 |
and start doing commercials again. |
| 00:05:41 |
Also known as never. |
| 00:05:44 |
You keep me honest, |
| 00:05:46 |
Well... |
| 00:05:47 |
It's not so bad. I mean, Gary has a car. |
| 00:05:49 |
That's helped out a lot around here. |
| 00:05:51 |
Gary has a car. |
| 00:05:52 |
Maybe I can get him |
| 00:05:56 |
Oh, you. |
| 00:05:57 |
What did I do so right |
| 00:06:09 |
Hey, Max. Hey. |
| 00:06:28 |
Okay, I... Okay, I get it. |
| 00:06:33 |
Hey, gang, what's up? |
| 00:06:35 |
Mr. Marschz, have you |
| 00:06:37 |
No. Why? |
| 00:06:39 |
Let's just say, it's new and different. |
| 00:06:41 |
Well, Rand, "new" and "different" |
| 00:07:05 |
In my prayer circle, I've been praying |
| 00:07:06 |
for more racial understanding, |
| 00:07:08 |
but I still get anxious around ethnics. |
| 00:07:20 |
Okay, please turn down the music. |
| 00:07:24 |
Not off, just down. |
| 00:07:27 |
Okay, we've got ourselves a full house! |
| 00:07:31 |
Scary! |
| 00:07:33 |
Normally, I only have the two students. |
| 00:07:35 |
Let's go around and find out |
| 00:07:40 |
You? |
| 00:07:42 |
Yolanda doesn't talk. |
| 00:07:44 |
But you know the only reason |
| 00:07:46 |
is because there's asbestos |
| 00:07:48 |
and because we live on |
| 00:07:50 |
and there isn't any money, |
| 00:07:51 |
they just decided to cancel |
| 00:07:54 |
You know, like computers and ceramics |
| 00:07:57 |
and shop and arts and crafts, and |
| 00:08:01 |
Did anyone pick drama as a first choice? |
| 00:08:07 |
That's fine. |
| 00:08:11 |
Better never than late. |
| 00:08:15 |
Okay, as a point of departure, |
| 00:08:18 |
Dead Poets Society, |
| 00:08:20 |
the always-superb Robin |
| 00:08:24 |
Well, it's very good. |
| 00:08:26 |
Mr. Williams' stand-in on |
| 00:08:29 |
Patch Adams, |
| 00:08:30 |
when I lived in Hollywood. Hey, come on. |
| 00:08:32 |
Hey, I'm just trying to be friendly. |
| 00:08:33 |
He once gave me a ride to my bus stop. |
| 00:08:37 |
I couldn't be happier |
| 00:08:39 |
Nice guys do finish first. |
| 00:08:44 |
So what's... Hey, what's your name? |
| 00:08:47 |
Heywood. |
| 00:08:48 |
Heywood... |
| 00:08:50 |
Heywood Jablomey. |
| 00:08:51 |
Right. |
| 00:08:54 |
Perhaps some of you have seen |
| 00:08:58 |
the movie Mr. Holland's Opus? |
| 00:09:00 |
Starring, I know... |
| 00:09:02 |
Starring Richard Dreyfuss as a |
| 00:09:06 |
He can't hear his music. Imagine that? |
| 00:09:09 |
Very sad. |
| 00:09:11 |
Also stars Glenne Headley. |
| 00:09:13 |
Wildly underrated. |
| 00:09:15 |
Check these out. They're all |
| 00:09:17 |
inspirational... |
| 00:09:19 |
Teacher. |
| 00:09:20 |
...teacher movies. |
| 00:09:23 |
What could I do |
| 00:09:26 |
to inspire... |
| 00:09:31 |
Hey, you fucking bastards! |
| 00:09:40 |
Just kidding. Hope I'm |
| 00:09:44 |
Wait, I hope I am freaking you out! |
| 00:09:48 |
Is this guy for real? |
| 00:09:49 |
Okay, let's start with an exercise. |
| 00:09:51 |
Rand, get up here. |
| 00:09:52 |
Okay, Rand. Be an animal. |
| 00:09:55 |
Hey, check this out. |
| 00:10:05 |
Yeah, this is one of the most basic |
| 00:10:11 |
That's beautiful, Rand. |
| 00:10:16 |
Feline good. |
| 00:10:18 |
Anyone tell what kind of animal Rand is? |
| 00:10:21 |
He's a pussy. |
| 00:10:25 |
Okay. |
| 00:10:27 |
Okay. So, Heywood. |
| 00:10:29 |
What? |
| 00:10:30 |
What kind of creature would you be? |
| 00:10:34 |
I could be a flaming ass crack. |
| 00:10:35 |
Oh, wait, you're already doing that. |
| 00:10:40 |
You know, I'd like to see your Bottom. |
| 00:10:43 |
Like to see my what? |
| 00:10:45 |
I'd like to see your Bottom. |
| 00:10:49 |
I mean, your portrayal of Bottom |
| 00:10:51 |
in A Midsummer Night's Dream. |
| 00:10:54 |
It's written by a buddy of |
| 00:10:56 |
William Shakespeare. |
| 00:10:58 |
Yeah, he liked to goof around, |
| 00:10:59 |
but most of the time he was serious. |
| 00:11:02 |
Because he, like I, believed |
| 00:11:05 |
not only to transform the actor, |
| 00:11:07 |
but also the audience. |
| 00:11:10 |
Do you believe that? |
| 00:11:11 |
Sounds kind of cuckoo-bananas. |
| 00:11:14 |
But I believe that. |
| 00:11:15 |
I believe that with |
| 00:11:17 |
If I kick this trash can... |
| 00:11:21 |
Oh, my God! Yolanda! |
| 00:11:25 |
Oh, my God! |
| 00:11:26 |
Okay, she's still conscious |
| 00:11:29 |
Man, you need to be careful. |
| 00:11:30 |
You know what I'm saying? |
| 00:11:31 |
Hey, I've learned a lesson here, |
| 00:11:35 |
About the vitality of shared experience. |
| 00:11:39 |
We will all remember this |
| 00:11:42 |
It was dramatic. It was visual. |
| 00:11:44 |
It was stupid. |
| 00:11:45 |
It was stupid, but it was also theater. |
| 00:11:49 |
Okay, I'd like to borrow |
| 00:11:52 |
Yolanda? |
| 00:11:55 |
Yolanda? |
| 00:11:56 |
It's free. Wake up. |
| 00:12:13 |
Hey. |
| 00:12:15 |
We started without you. |
| 00:12:16 |
Apologies. |
| 00:12:18 |
I had to spend some |
| 00:12:20 |
for the school district and paramedics. |
| 00:12:22 |
Now, it's all going to work out. |
| 00:12:24 |
There's no brain damage. |
| 00:12:25 |
No charges will be pressed. |
| 00:12:29 |
I think I need a |
| 00:12:32 |
Nothing you are saying |
| 00:12:35 |
Turns out my class is fourteen |
| 00:12:39 |
I've got a real tough nut to crack. |
| 00:12:41 |
A Mexican boy, lives by his wits. |
| 00:12:45 |
I'm going to inspire this year. |
| 00:12:47 |
I mean, make a real difference. |
| 00:12:49 |
I feel, for the first time, I |
| 00:12:53 |
Oh, God! I am getting hammered! |
| 00:12:59 |
Careful, Brie. You know how you get. |
| 00:13:04 |
No, Dana. How do I get? |
| 00:13:07 |
Please, tell me how I get. |
| 00:13:15 |
Hmm? |
| 00:13:20 |
No, I see. I got you. I totally got you. |
| 00:13:25 |
Okay, she got me. |
| 00:13:33 |
You guys laugh so much. |
| 00:13:35 |
Another gem of an insight from Gary. |
| 00:13:38 |
Our boarder, Gary. |
| 00:13:43 |
Hey, don't forget. We have |
| 00:13:48 |
at the sperm doctor on Wednesday. |
| 00:13:53 |
I don't like airing |
| 00:13:55 |
in front of |
| 00:13:57 |
but if you're shooting |
| 00:13:58 |
I'm going to stab you |
| 00:14:03 |
But, seriously, you gotta |
| 00:14:05 |
It's in that pamphlet I read. |
| 00:14:08 |
It's... And the corduroy has got |
| 00:14:12 |
It's like... |
| 00:14:14 |
We live in Tucson, for fuck's sake. |
| 00:14:16 |
You're broiling our little tadpoles |
| 00:14:18 |
in that crotch of yours. What? |
| 00:14:23 |
Can I get a virgin strawberry, please? |
| 00:14:26 |
Seven years sober. |
| 00:14:29 |
Awesome. |
| 00:14:31 |
I seriously, seriously wish |
| 00:14:34 |
Brie, I would never judge you. |
| 00:14:36 |
Good, because if I had to give up booze, |
| 00:14:38 |
I'd blow my brains out |
| 00:14:42 |
Anyway, to Dana. |
| 00:14:47 |
My husband. What the |
| 00:14:50 |
I'm just kidding. |
| 00:14:53 |
I don't have a drink. |
| 00:14:58 |
Did you do something |
| 00:15:01 |
Look, I have a life plan, |
| 00:15:07 |
Well, if you don't |
| 00:15:08 |
how are you supposed to |
| 00:15:10 |
That's the whole point. |
| 00:15:11 |
I don't want to spend time with you. |
| 00:15:12 |
So pretty! |
| 00:15:14 |
It's from Ethiopia. |
| 00:15:18 |
I re-watched a fantastic |
| 00:15:22 |
Dangerous Minds, |
| 00:15:25 |
starring the gorgeous Michelle Pfeiffer. |
| 00:15:28 |
It gave me a little insight into |
| 00:15:34 |
Okay, stand up. |
| 00:15:35 |
Why? |
| 00:15:37 |
We're going to karate. |
| 00:15:40 |
No, man. I don't think so. |
| 00:15:42 |
Come on. |
| 00:15:52 |
Nice freeball. |
| 00:15:55 |
Now, punch me. |
| 00:15:57 |
I'm not punching a guy in a dress. |
| 00:15:59 |
It's a kaftan, my friend. |
| 00:16:01 |
Keeps my balls at room temp. Now, do it. |
| 00:16:05 |
Don't make me do this. |
| 00:16:07 |
Do it. |
| 00:16:08 |
Do it! |
| 00:16:11 |
You all right? |
| 00:16:13 |
Mr. M? Oh, my God! |
| 00:16:15 |
I can't believe this is happening to me. |
| 00:16:18 |
Mr. M, are you okay? |
| 00:16:20 |
Breathe! |
| 00:16:23 |
I wasn't ready. |
| 00:16:25 |
Mr. Marx, could I have a minute? |
| 00:16:27 |
Sure! Sure, sure. |
| 00:16:37 |
What's the matter with you? |
| 00:16:39 |
Trying to inspire a troubled student. |
| 00:16:42 |
Look, I thought you should |
| 00:16:45 |
Last night, the school board, which |
| 00:16:49 |
decided to cancel drama. |
| 00:16:51 |
Cancel how? |
| 00:16:53 |
Completely. Forever. |
| 00:16:55 |
You can stay till the end of |
| 00:17:00 |
You can't have a school |
| 00:17:03 |
Sure, you can. |
| 00:17:06 |
This is obviously a practical joke. |
| 00:17:09 |
Look, the county and the school |
| 00:17:12 |
All the arts programs |
| 00:17:15 |
And let's face it, we're not |
| 00:17:21 |
Tony. |
| 00:17:22 |
What? |
| 00:17:23 |
That would be Tony-winners. |
| 00:17:25 |
It's the award for theater. |
| 00:17:27 |
Listen up, guy. I've seen your plays. |
| 00:17:29 |
This is no great loss. |
| 00:17:41 |
Well, you're a dirty, violent beaner! |
| 00:17:43 |
You shouldn't have hit him like that! |
| 00:17:44 |
Shut up, you cow. It wasn't my fault. |
| 00:17:45 |
He made me hit him. |
| 00:17:46 |
That, to you... |
| 00:17:48 |
You are racist, okay? |
| 00:17:49 |
And a terrible person! Oh, really? |
| 00:17:52 |
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! |
| 00:17:55 |
Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! |
| 00:18:01 |
Mr. Marschz? Are you okay? |
| 00:18:05 |
No, Rand! I'm not okay! |
| 00:18:15 |
Can you tell me how |
| 00:18:19 |
a little boy |
| 00:18:22 |
from a dairy farm in Manitoba, |
| 00:18:24 |
who dreams of acting but |
| 00:18:29 |
and could never get a decent agent, |
| 00:18:32 |
so he moves on, decides to teach, |
| 00:18:36 |
to pass on his love of the craft... |
| 00:18:40 |
Can you tell me how |
| 00:18:45 |
God-awful crap that's |
| 00:18:49 |
wrapping his lips around a.45 |
| 00:18:51 |
and just blowing his brains out? |
| 00:18:54 |
Don't do it! |
| 00:19:00 |
Is he acting? |
| 00:19:01 |
No, he's not that good. |
| 00:19:02 |
Mr. Marschz! |
| 00:19:07 |
Dana Marschz's wavering consciousness |
| 00:19:10 |
led him to believe that |
| 00:19:12 |
and all its trials. |
| 00:19:16 |
But the fates had long ago deigned |
| 00:19:18 |
that his life's work |
| 00:19:30 |
Where the fark have you been? |
| 00:19:32 |
Staring into the abyss of nothingness. |
| 00:19:37 |
Drama has been cancelled. |
| 00:19:42 |
Finally! Now you can go |
| 00:19:45 |
and start making some real money. |
| 00:19:47 |
Oh, Dana, I found a great |
| 00:19:50 |
and there was still time on the meter. |
| 00:19:55 |
They should just ship |
| 00:19:57 |
you know, let you talk to people. |
| 00:19:58 |
All the terrorists would |
| 00:20:01 |
Well, I, for one, am very |
| 00:20:05 |
Why did you bring that thing? |
| 00:20:08 |
I don't know. I thought maybe I |
| 00:20:20 |
Maybe it's better that I just... |
| 00:20:22 |
I can't get pregnant. |
| 00:20:23 |
I think we shouldn't |
| 00:20:26 |
This is for you, baby. |
| 00:20:28 |
Am I shooting blanks? |
| 00:20:31 |
Are my testicles an empty tank? |
| 00:20:36 |
Is it all a ruse when I go kergluge? |
| 00:20:42 |
Why? |
| 00:20:45 |
I want to |
| 00:20:48 |
Splash you with my |
| 00:20:54 |
So put your lips around |
| 00:20:59 |
It's nuclear war! |
| 00:21:03 |
Meyerschz? Yeah, I need a |
| 00:21:08 |
Can you get the... Thanks. |
| 00:21:13 |
I'm sorry about my husband. |
| 00:21:14 |
He's not right in the head. |
| 00:21:16 |
It's okay. It's Marschz, by the way. |
| 00:21:17 |
Marschz? Yeah. |
| 00:21:19 |
Marschz. |
| 00:21:20 |
Marschz? |
| 00:21:21 |
Marschz. |
| 00:21:23 |
Marschz? |
| 00:21:24 |
Marschz. |
| 00:21:25 |
Marschz. |
| 00:21:26 |
I don't care. |
| 00:21:29 |
Excuse me, I'm sorry to be so forward, |
| 00:21:31 |
but you look a lot like my favorite |
| 00:21:36 |
Yeah. I am her. |
| 00:21:38 |
But you really look like her. |
| 00:21:40 |
Well, that's because I am her. |
| 00:21:43 |
Oh, my God! I knew it in my heart-soul. |
| 00:21:47 |
Oh, my God! I'm freaking out! |
| 00:21:50 |
I'm freaking out. |
| 00:21:51 |
You, you were wonderful |
| 00:21:54 |
Oh, thank you. |
| 00:21:55 |
...and so fabulously funny |
| 00:21:57 |
not forgetting Cocktail with Tom Cruise. |
| 00:22:00 |
What is he like? He seems totally great. |
| 00:22:02 |
What are you doing in Tucson? |
| 00:22:03 |
Oh, my God! I'm freaking out! |
| 00:22:06 |
I'm actually a nurse now. |
| 00:22:08 |
I just, you know, got kind of |
| 00:22:12 |
Sick of all the horrible people, |
| 00:22:14 |
and it's all about being |
| 00:22:16 |
Anyway, there's a real |
| 00:22:19 |
and I like taking care of people. |
| 00:22:23 |
Oh, my God! I didn't hear |
| 00:22:25 |
because I'm too excited. |
| 00:22:26 |
Would you come and speak |
| 00:22:29 |
They would just lose their minds. |
| 00:22:31 |
No. They wouldn't even |
| 00:22:34 |
They would. |
| 00:22:36 |
All right. I'll come. |
| 00:22:39 |
But, I'm gonna talk about all the |
| 00:22:43 |
the rejection... |
| 00:22:44 |
Perfect! |
| 00:22:45 |
So, what's Nick Cage really like? |
| 00:22:47 |
I mean, were you just |
| 00:22:51 |
I have to go back to work. |
| 00:22:53 |
Elisabeth Shue. |
| 00:22:54 |
I feel so connected to you. Yes, I do. |
| 00:22:58 |
And I thank you for |
| 00:23:01 |
You're welcome. |
| 00:23:03 |
Shoo! Shoo, Shue! |
| 00:23:06 |
Oh, God! |
| 00:23:08 |
Doctor! Oh, my God! |
| 00:23:20 |
Okay, gang. |
| 00:23:21 |
This is the amount |
| 00:23:28 |
6K, a.k.a. $6,000. How do we get it? |
| 00:23:33 |
Piff? Bake sale. |
| 00:23:35 |
Not enough dough, pun intended. |
| 00:23:39 |
Yo. We could knock over a 7-Eleven. |
| 00:23:42 |
Nice thought, |
| 00:23:44 |
but 7-Elevens are not as |
| 00:23:47 |
Don't ask me how I know that. |
| 00:23:48 |
I saw it on the Discovery Channel. |
| 00:23:51 |
I've got a little something-something. |
| 00:23:53 |
Let's hear it. |
| 00:23:54 |
Toasters. Man, you know, |
| 00:23:56 |
You know, 10 grands. |
| 00:23:59 |
Hell, we could do that. |
| 00:24:01 |
Hey, dumbass! |
| 00:24:04 |
"Toaster" is street for "gun." |
| 00:24:06 |
"Toaster" is street for "gun"? |
| 00:24:08 |
What a colorful expression! |
| 00:24:10 |
There he goes! The little kangaroo rat! |
| 00:24:16 |
Hey, Noah Sapperstein. |
| 00:24:18 |
Oh, hi! |
| 00:24:19 |
Happy? Huh? |
| 00:24:21 |
Happy you finally |
| 00:24:24 |
No. I think it's |
| 00:24:26 |
to arts education in this country. |
| 00:24:29 |
I don't know what to do. |
| 00:24:30 |
Everything is out of control. |
| 00:24:32 |
You want to save drama, but you've |
| 00:24:35 |
You know, it's like... |
| 00:24:37 |
It's like my father got reincarnated |
| 00:24:39 |
into the body of a freaking |
| 00:24:41 |
Look, all I'm saying is, |
| 00:24:44 |
you need to inspire everyone |
| 00:24:48 |
You know, I was thinking of working |
| 00:24:51 |
on a musical version of The Lake House, |
| 00:24:52 |
you know the wonderful Sandra |
| 00:24:56 |
Play with space and time. |
| 00:24:58 |
No? No. |
| 00:25:01 |
There is one other thing. |
| 00:25:03 |
It's a piece I've been working on. |
| 00:25:04 |
I have the first act and reams |
| 00:25:09 |
It's called Hamlet 2. |
| 00:25:13 |
A sequel to Hamlet by Shakespeare? |
| 00:25:16 |
Yes. Yes. Do you think it's a bad idea? |
| 00:25:19 |
Not necessarily, no. |
| 00:25:22 |
Sometimes an idea could be so |
| 00:25:25 |
But... And so, what about |
| 00:25:30 |
Forget about the money right now. |
| 00:25:31 |
Put on a play, and make it |
| 00:25:35 |
Use that as a way of drawing |
| 00:25:39 |
What if it sucks? |
| 00:25:42 |
Isn't that a question every |
| 00:25:44 |
Yes! I am an artist, aren't I? |
| 00:25:50 |
Thank you. You've given me the |
| 00:25:53 |
Okay, well, I need to go to recess now. |
| 00:25:55 |
You're very busy. I understand. |
| 00:26:14 |
Oh, my God! Writing is so hard. |
| 00:26:35 |
What is your fucking problem, man? |
| 00:26:42 |
Huh? |
| 00:27:52 |
Dana? Dana? Hey, I need some money. |
| 00:27:55 |
Hey, it's done. |
| 00:27:58 |
What is? My original work |
| 00:28:00 |
The thing I've been working on |
| 00:28:04 |
Oh, is that what you were doing? |
| 00:28:05 |
I thought you were just |
| 00:28:07 |
You're not far off, ladypants. |
| 00:28:10 |
Any creative person will tell you, |
| 00:28:11 |
you gotta go a little crazy |
| 00:28:19 |
Hamlet 2? |
| 00:28:20 |
The deuce. Correct. |
| 00:28:22 |
Doesn't everybody die at |
| 00:28:25 |
I have a device. |
| 00:28:27 |
"The time machine door opens..." |
| 00:28:28 |
That's the device. |
| 00:28:30 |
"...revealing Hamlet, |
| 00:28:34 |
"and Hillary Clinton having |
| 00:28:37 |
It's about my troubled |
| 00:28:42 |
But, you're doing this at |
| 00:28:45 |
That's the plan, Stan. |
| 00:28:48 |
I think that your |
| 00:28:54 |
I will take that! I will take it! |
| 00:29:00 |
Hey, Dana. |
| 00:29:01 |
Hello, Gary. |
| 00:29:04 |
Hey! Guess what I've got! |
| 00:29:05 |
Your head out of your ass? |
| 00:29:06 |
No! |
| 00:29:09 |
Right. Watch out! This stuff is sharp. |
| 00:29:14 |
As in cutting edge. All righty! |
| 00:29:20 |
Are you okay? |
| 00:29:25 |
Yes! |
| 00:29:26 |
You're telling me that this |
| 00:29:29 |
from Denmark 400 years ago? |
| 00:29:33 |
And you call me a drunk? |
| 00:29:36 |
It's true, Papa. I done saw it. |
| 00:29:40 |
Come here, boy. |
| 00:29:48 |
Take it easy on him, |
| 00:29:55 |
Come closer. |
| 00:30:01 |
Lay a hand on him, and I |
| 00:30:05 |
You trying to take me |
| 00:30:10 |
Getting drunk and beating |
| 00:30:13 |
That doesn't make you a |
| 00:30:16 |
I got the mind to put |
| 00:30:17 |
Then fucking do it, bitch! |
| 00:30:19 |
Oh, yeah? Do it, motherfucker, come on. |
| 00:30:21 |
What? Bring it! |
| 00:30:22 |
Excuse me! Excuse me, |
| 00:30:25 |
and he's definitely not |
| 00:30:27 |
and the violence is getting |
| 00:30:29 |
thank you very much. |
| 00:30:31 |
Okay, let's stop there. |
| 00:30:36 |
Heywood, that was very powerful. |
| 00:30:39 |
Yeah, that was. |
| 00:30:42 |
It was gangster. |
| 00:30:45 |
Wow. Where were you when I was seven? |
| 00:30:50 |
Class, thoughts? |
| 00:30:51 |
I thought Octavio was amazing. |
| 00:30:54 |
I felt this electric charge! |
| 00:30:56 |
He's so much more powerful |
| 00:31:03 |
It's stupid to compare. |
| 00:31:05 |
I'm just so surprised that |
| 00:31:10 |
"One of you people"? |
| 00:31:12 |
Man, that's some |
| 00:31:14 |
I heard that, man. |
| 00:31:16 |
If you don't like this class, get out. |
| 00:31:18 |
Or what, bitch? |
| 00:31:19 |
Don't you call me a |
| 00:31:21 |
I'm so sick and tired of you, Epiphany. |
| 00:31:23 |
You're hurting me! |
| 00:31:26 |
Don't do that to my friend! |
| 00:31:29 |
That's it, that's it. |
| 00:31:30 |
Let me give you a piece of my mind. |
| 00:31:33 |
No, I'm really different. |
| 00:31:35 |
You've got to do something, Dana. |
| 00:31:39 |
Time out! Time out! |
| 00:31:41 |
You've got to do something, Dana. |
| 00:31:45 |
You want nachos or pizza? |
| 00:31:47 |
Nacho! |
| 00:31:50 |
I have access to the activities van. |
| 00:31:53 |
We can go to the Fun Zone in the mall. |
| 00:31:56 |
I'll get everyone a snack. |
| 00:31:59 |
You want nachos or pizza? |
| 00:32:02 |
I could go for some nachos. |
| 00:32:04 |
Figures. |
| 00:32:05 |
I'm not doing carbs, but maybe |
| 00:32:09 |
Anything is better than this. |
| 00:32:11 |
All right, we're back on track! |
| 00:32:14 |
And we cannot be stopped! |
| 00:32:16 |
Yeah. |
| 00:32:26 |
I just don't even care. |
| 00:32:28 |
Hey, Mr. Marschz. |
| 00:32:30 |
Hey, are you mad at me? |
| 00:32:32 |
No, no. |
| 00:32:34 |
I don't know. |
| 00:32:35 |
You've barely spoken to me all day. |
| 00:32:36 |
Is it because of my resistance |
| 00:32:39 |
Hey, hey, just because they're Latinos |
| 00:32:41 |
doesn't make them gang-bangers. Got it? |
| 00:32:43 |
Yeah, I'm sorry. I |
| 00:32:47 |
I just don't want anything to change. |
| 00:32:50 |
Rand, you're teacher's pet. |
| 00:32:51 |
What more do you want? |
| 00:32:53 |
Come on, let's go hang with the gang. |
| 00:32:57 |
You mean Latinos. |
| 00:32:58 |
Hey, you little thing. Come on. |
| 00:33:03 |
Hey, guys, I'm Groucho Marx. |
| 00:33:05 |
I say funny stuff. |
| 00:33:10 |
Mr. Marschz, these guys are drunk. |
| 00:33:14 |
Come on, guys. I said no drinking. |
| 00:33:16 |
Why don't you have one with us, ese? |
| 00:33:17 |
Maybe you'd stop being |
| 00:33:22 |
The truth is, Heywood, I haven't |
| 00:33:25 |
I got the chip on my |
| 00:33:27 |
from an organization called AA. |
| 00:33:29 |
Really? |
| 00:33:30 |
Yeah. It's a slippery slope. |
| 00:33:33 |
Beer, liquor, dope, coke, meth, |
| 00:33:39 |
Hey, what would happen |
| 00:33:44 |
My entire life would fall apart. |
| 00:33:48 |
Okay. Who wants to go? Me. |
| 00:33:50 |
I would love to go home. |
| 00:33:52 |
No, no, no, no, no. You can't leave now. |
| 00:33:55 |
We just coming together |
| 00:33:57 |
No. |
| 00:33:58 |
Heywood, it's late and |
| 00:34:01 |
Hey, we got you another mango iced tea. |
| 00:34:04 |
Mango iced tea is my kryptonite. |
| 00:34:06 |
It's totally. |
| 00:34:07 |
Powerless to resist. |
| 00:34:09 |
Okay, a few more minutes won't hurt. |
| 00:34:15 |
Yeah, I'd drink to that. |
| 00:34:21 |
He's about to go through |
| 00:34:31 |
Sir, I'm gonna need you to wake up |
| 00:34:32 |
and show me some form of identification. |
| 00:34:38 |
Time begins and stops now. |
| 00:34:42 |
We have a 410 with a 6l4 in |
| 00:34:46 |
What do those numbers mean? |
| 00:34:48 |
Come on. |
| 00:34:49 |
Are you sending me to the gas chamber? |
| 00:34:51 |
Right this way, sir. |
| 00:34:52 |
What is happening? |
| 00:34:59 |
Good morning, class. |
| 00:35:02 |
Okay, I'd like to start |
| 00:35:06 |
First of all, acid |
| 00:35:12 |
and B, where are my pants and underwear? |
| 00:35:24 |
Excuse me, Mr. Marschz. |
| 00:35:27 |
We need to discuss something |
| 00:35:30 |
The role of Laertes, my part, |
| 00:35:34 |
He's not gay. He's bi-curious. |
| 00:35:37 |
And the role has also |
| 00:35:41 |
Rand, theater is a living thing. |
| 00:35:43 |
Octavio's performance the other day, |
| 00:35:45 |
combined with my wife's |
| 00:35:48 |
not to mention the acid, |
| 00:35:50 |
inspired me to take some bold steps |
| 00:35:52 |
in looking at my |
| 00:35:53 |
That meant reducing Laertes' role. |
| 00:35:57 |
And the gay thing, I just thought |
| 00:36:00 |
What? What? |
| 00:36:02 |
This has nothing to |
| 00:36:07 |
Listen, listen, I've given |
| 00:36:11 |
and now it all goes out |
| 00:36:15 |
Because he inspired you? |
| 00:36:18 |
It's what's best for the play. |
| 00:36:21 |
Not acceptable! I quit! |
| 00:36:26 |
Oh, man, you can't quit now. |
| 00:36:35 |
Rand! |
| 00:36:39 |
Rand! What? |
| 00:36:41 |
Let's talk about this. |
| 00:36:43 |
I hate you, you stupid, fat fucker! |
| 00:36:59 |
Am I fat? |
| 00:37:03 |
I want you to meet a friend of mine. |
| 00:37:05 |
He got stuck inside my time machine. |
| 00:37:06 |
His name is Jesus Christ. |
| 00:37:08 |
Oh, yeah. We heard you were coming back. |
| 00:37:11 |
Jesus has a rocking swimmer's bod. |
| 00:37:15 |
Okay, can I ask you a question? |
| 00:37:18 |
Sure. |
| 00:37:20 |
What's really going on here? |
| 00:37:22 |
Is Jesus, like, a swimmer? |
| 00:37:25 |
Jesus is very lean... |
| 00:37:27 |
Can we please wait |
| 00:37:31 |
Thank you. |
| 00:37:36 |
Where was I? Jesus has a swimmer's body. |
| 00:37:38 |
Jesus has a swimmer's body, |
| 00:37:40 |
and while he's one of the |
| 00:37:43 |
he's also very attractive to you. |
| 00:37:45 |
He's attractive to me? |
| 00:37:48 |
Jesus is sexy to you. Which leads |
| 00:37:51 |
Rock Me, Sexy Jesus. |
| 00:37:59 |
Okay, you are |
| 00:38:04 |
I can't do the play. |
| 00:38:07 |
What? |
| 00:38:08 |
My dad's making me quit the play. |
| 00:38:09 |
That's impossible. You're the lead. |
| 00:38:11 |
He said, "No way." |
| 00:38:12 |
Goddamn macho bastards |
| 00:38:17 |
They just don't get it! |
| 00:38:20 |
Okay, we're fighting this. |
| 00:38:23 |
Even if we have to take |
| 00:38:25 |
No, wait. What do you mean? |
| 00:38:27 |
We're going to your house. Now. |
| 00:38:28 |
No, no, no, we can't do that. |
| 00:38:29 |
It's not a good idea. |
| 00:38:30 |
My father tried to stand in |
| 00:38:32 |
He's dead now, |
| 00:38:34 |
but you could say, like Hamlet's |
| 00:38:38 |
Because he caused me so much pain, |
| 00:38:39 |
which is why I tried to become an actor, |
| 00:38:41 |
which caused me so much pain. |
| 00:38:51 |
You can't let your |
| 00:38:54 |
stop your son from |
| 00:38:56 |
I have to take exception |
| 00:39:00 |
Heywood's a bad boy. |
| 00:39:01 |
He's a gang-banger. A deadbeat. |
| 00:39:03 |
But he also has a gift. |
| 00:39:05 |
Who is Heywood? |
| 00:39:08 |
Your son, Heywood Jablomey. |
| 00:39:12 |
Oh. |
| 00:39:13 |
I just got that. |
| 00:39:16 |
Octavio doesn't belong to a gang. |
| 00:39:18 |
He's got a 3.9 and an |
| 00:39:21 |
He does? |
| 00:39:22 |
Yes, our concerns about the |
| 00:39:25 |
If it's the sex and violence, |
| 00:39:28 |
No, we are fine with those. |
| 00:39:29 |
Then what is it? |
| 00:39:31 |
We merely expressed our |
| 00:39:35 |
to what is arguably the greatest |
| 00:39:39 |
Not to mention the quality of |
| 00:39:45 |
Well, no offense, but what |
| 00:39:50 |
Well, I've published nine novels. |
| 00:39:52 |
I have a PhD in literature. |
| 00:39:54 |
My wife is a painter. |
| 00:39:56 |
She currently has an exhibit |
| 00:40:00 |
Oh, okay. |
| 00:40:02 |
Then... |
| 00:40:04 |
Help me fix my play! |
| 00:40:06 |
I'm trying to save drama! |
| 00:40:08 |
You have Hamlet using a time machine |
| 00:40:11 |
to stop Gertrude from |
| 00:40:14 |
to stop Ophelia from drowning. |
| 00:40:16 |
You're taking the tragedy |
| 00:40:19 |
I just wondered why in |
| 00:40:24 |
It's such a downer! I mean, if Hamlet |
| 00:40:28 |
he could have turned everything around. |
| 00:40:30 |
Everybody deserves a second chance! |
| 00:40:33 |
Yes, well, we'll let |
| 00:40:37 |
Thank you for taking the time. |
| 00:40:39 |
Let me show you the way out. |
| 00:40:41 |
Could we talk more? |
| 00:40:42 |
I would love to get your notes. |
| 00:40:44 |
I would do anything... I'd do chores. |
| 00:40:45 |
I'd clean your rain gutters. |
| 00:40:47 |
I'm afraid we don't have rain gutters. |
| 00:40:48 |
You're a liar, everybody |
| 00:40:55 |
Mr. Rocker? |
| 00:40:57 |
Yes, what is it, Rand? |
| 00:41:01 |
Here. |
| 00:41:04 |
Hamlet 2? |
| 00:41:06 |
It's the play Mr. Marschz wrote. |
| 00:41:09 |
What about it? |
| 00:41:11 |
I think you need to take a look at it. |
| 00:41:13 |
Why? |
| 00:41:15 |
Let's just say that |
| 00:41:17 |
where Gertrude gives Hamlet a hand job, |
| 00:41:18 |
you'll sense my drift. |
| 00:41:20 |
Did you just say "hand job"? |
| 00:41:21 |
Yes, I did. |
| 00:41:23 |
He thinks he's going to |
| 00:41:25 |
Mr. Rocker, if you care about |
| 00:41:30 |
you will stop Dana |
| 00:41:33 |
Then take him from behind! |
| 00:41:42 |
Go Mustangs! |
| 00:41:45 |
Hey! |
| 00:41:46 |
I'm here for her. I'm here for her. |
| 00:41:50 |
Apologies, the Snackatorium is no |
| 00:41:55 |
the ladies who make macaroni and |
| 00:41:59 |
So without further ado, I'd like |
| 00:42:06 |
Elisabeth Shue, get up here. |
| 00:42:08 |
All right. |
| 00:42:13 |
Thank you. |
| 00:42:14 |
Thank you so much for having me. |
| 00:42:18 |
God, I really have a tough time |
| 00:42:20 |
I get a little nervous. |
| 00:42:22 |
I'm way more nervous than you. |
| 00:42:23 |
I'm like... My brain is like mush. |
| 00:42:27 |
Elisabeth Shue, is she real? |
| 00:42:30 |
Somebody pinch my ass. |
| 00:42:32 |
It's inappropriate. |
| 00:42:35 |
Should we just take questions? |
| 00:42:37 |
That'd be great. |
| 00:42:39 |
Okay, class, questions for Ms. Shue. |
| 00:42:42 |
Someone other than Epiphany. |
| 00:42:45 |
Okay, not all at once. |
| 00:42:48 |
You guys, come on, I asked |
| 00:42:52 |
You know, I'm a reasonable guy. |
| 00:42:54 |
I don't lose it when I... |
| 00:42:55 |
Jesus Christ! |
| 00:42:57 |
Can we not share this space in peace? |
| 00:43:07 |
Epiphany? |
| 00:43:08 |
Hi. I just want to say I |
| 00:43:13 |
Thank you. Thank you very much. |
| 00:43:15 |
It is nice. |
| 00:43:16 |
What about Mr. Alpha Male up there? |
| 00:43:19 |
Got a question for Ms. Shue? |
| 00:43:21 |
Yeah. |
| 00:43:24 |
Who are you? Oh, come on! |
| 00:43:26 |
Could you not even Google her? |
| 00:43:29 |
The Karate Kid, the |
| 00:43:33 |
Soapdish. Dreamer, |
| 00:43:36 |
Any of that shit ring a bell? |
| 00:43:40 |
Sorry. Pardon my French. |
| 00:43:43 |
I've heard the word "shit" before. |
| 00:43:45 |
In Hollywood, you pretty |
| 00:43:48 |
That is funny, that's... |
| 00:43:51 |
Excuse me for a second. |
| 00:43:58 |
What do you miss about acting? |
| 00:44:00 |
You know what I really |
| 00:44:02 |
I miss kissing. In love scenes. |
| 00:44:05 |
I had so much fun making out |
| 00:44:09 |
I would love to stay and hear this. |
| 00:44:12 |
Yeah, I think if I had one |
| 00:44:14 |
it would be that you don't get |
| 00:44:23 |
It's fricking exciting having |
| 00:44:26 |
Because of its unwholesome content, |
| 00:44:28 |
the school cannot allow |
| 00:44:33 |
Where did you get that? |
| 00:44:34 |
Entirely beside the point. |
| 00:44:36 |
Did Rand give it to you? |
| 00:44:37 |
Nudity and pornography are not |
| 00:44:40 |
There's no nudity or pornography! |
| 00:44:43 |
Minimal. |
| 00:44:44 |
You have Satan French-kissing |
| 00:44:46 |
the President of the |
| 00:44:48 |
It's a parting embrace before |
| 00:44:51 |
The climax of a modernist dance. |
| 00:44:53 |
I think when all is said and done, |
| 00:44:55 |
you will find it quite moving. |
| 00:44:57 |
Trust me, I won't. |
| 00:44:59 |
We're 10 days away. |
| 00:45:01 |
Art is happening. |
| 00:45:03 |
Well, stop it. |
| 00:45:04 |
You can't stop art. |
| 00:45:07 |
You're shut down, Marx! |
| 00:45:08 |
No, you are. You are. |
| 00:45:10 |
You never believed in |
| 00:45:13 |
We're putting this play on, and if |
| 00:45:16 |
you ass-turd |
| 00:45:27 |
Oh, my God! |
| 00:45:40 |
Let me see. |
| 00:45:43 |
Oh, Shue. |
| 00:45:45 |
How do you keep your head held |
| 00:45:48 |
steaming piles of crap in your face? |
| 00:45:51 |
I know, I know. |
| 00:45:54 |
That's why I got out of the business. |
| 00:46:10 |
Well, fuck you, too. |
| 00:46:11 |
I have to elevate it. |
| 00:46:14 |
It's not broken and, |
| 00:46:18 |
to play any and all musical instruments. |
| 00:46:24 |
I have to tell you something. |
| 00:46:32 |
I'm pregnant. |
| 00:46:37 |
Really? |
| 00:46:43 |
Are you shitting me? |
| 00:46:45 |
No, no. |
| 00:46:50 |
Christ in a basket, |
| 00:46:52 |
And it will always be too tight. |
| 00:46:53 |
I will never not hug this unborn baby! |
| 00:47:07 |
It's like he's giving me hope. |
| 00:47:10 |
Who? |
| 00:47:12 |
God. |
| 00:47:17 |
At this point, it felt to Dana |
| 00:47:19 |
as if the air was |
| 00:47:22 |
But just as Icarus flew |
| 00:47:26 |
oblivious to his impending doom, |
| 00:47:29 |
so was poor, dear Dana Marschz. |
| 00:47:46 |
Well, I'm lost. |
| 00:47:53 |
Is blue the right color |
| 00:47:57 |
for a controversial piece of |
| 00:48:02 |
I think blue makes people sad. |
| 00:48:11 |
Yes, it does. |
| 00:48:14 |
There's also orange. |
| 00:48:16 |
Orange. |
| 00:48:20 |
The color of fire. |
| 00:48:22 |
Of ripe tangerines, of |
| 00:48:34 |
Glenn, we've done it! |
| 00:48:42 |
Stop staring at me. |
| 00:48:45 |
Okay, all right. Okay. |
| 00:48:49 |
It's ridiculous. But I love it. |
| 00:48:53 |
Okay, guys, I am pretty effing excited |
| 00:48:56 |
to announce that the musical |
| 00:48:59 |
will be provided by the |
| 00:49:05 |
Just a steel-town girl |
| 00:49:09 |
Looking for the fight of her life |
| 00:49:12 |
In the real-time world |
| 00:49:15 |
They all say she's crazy |
| 00:49:19 |
Locking rhythms to the beat of her heart |
| 00:49:22 |
Changing movement into light |
| 00:49:25 |
She has danced into the danger zone |
| 00:49:28 |
When the dancer becomes the dance |
| 00:49:33 |
It can cut you like a knife |
| 00:49:36 |
Hey, guys, thanks a lot for |
| 00:49:40 |
It really helped out a lot. |
| 00:49:42 |
When did you guys get started? |
| 00:49:44 |
We seen them Kill Bill |
| 00:49:47 |
and we said, "Shit, we got some wire, |
| 00:49:50 |
"we got some harnesses." |
| 00:49:52 |
So we get to work in the backyard, |
| 00:49:55 |
and next thing you know, |
| 00:49:58 |
So this is your first attempt? |
| 00:50:00 |
Yes, sir. |
| 00:50:02 |
Now hold on, girl. |
| 00:50:05 |
Three, two, one. |
| 00:50:14 |
That's cool. |
| 00:50:16 |
Okay. So this is the Danish |
| 00:50:22 |
It's fantastic. |
| 00:50:24 |
I don't know what it means, but I |
| 00:50:29 |
Yeah? Yeah. |
| 00:50:30 |
Who said shop class was useless? |
| 00:50:32 |
I don't know. |
| 00:50:34 |
Wait, somebody said that? |
| 00:50:35 |
It's a figure of speech. |
| 00:50:37 |
Hey, M. Hey. |
| 00:50:38 |
Hey, my buddy's meth lab burned down. |
| 00:50:40 |
I'm sorry to hear that. |
| 00:50:41 |
No, it's going to be some pretty |
| 00:50:44 |
Well, excellent. Hey, girls. |
| 00:50:46 |
Hey, Mr. Marschz. What? |
| 00:50:47 |
I was thinking, what |
| 00:50:49 |
rolled up in low-riders |
| 00:50:52 |
That sounds kind of dangerous. |
| 00:50:54 |
Yeah, maybe so. |
| 00:50:55 |
Which is why I want to do it. |
| 00:50:59 |
We are not making safe theater. |
| 00:51:03 |
I'm in the wrong place. |
| 00:51:10 |
Jesus Jones! Rocker's changed the locks. |
| 00:51:15 |
That is the first shot across |
| 00:51:18 |
Just like that wonderful |
| 00:51:21 |
starring the terrifyingly real |
| 00:51:24 |
Five more seconds. |
| 00:51:26 |
Okay, Chuy, breaking and entering |
| 00:51:32 |
But we got shit to do. |
| 00:51:35 |
Hey, you get off school |
| 00:51:40 |
or I'm gonna have the |
| 00:51:42 |
so far up your ass you're |
| 00:52:04 |
"What about Hamlet 2 |
| 00:52:06 |
"Principal Rocker to such a degree? |
| 00:52:08 |
"Or is offense the offense at all? |
| 00:52:10 |
"Truth is a nebulous commodity. |
| 00:52:12 |
"As Roland Barthes tells us, 'Multiple |
| 00:52:17 |
Does anybody know what this means? |
| 00:52:18 |
Did you see this article in the paper? |
| 00:52:20 |
We're already reading it, woman. |
| 00:52:21 |
Not the school paper. The News Press. |
| 00:52:23 |
I stole it from Starbucks. |
| 00:52:25 |
You really think you're |
| 00:52:26 |
Don't fuck with me, homey! I'll cut you. |
| 00:52:28 |
I liked you better when you |
| 00:52:33 |
Oh, my God. |
| 00:52:35 |
"Why is the school board |
| 00:52:37 |
That's a picture of me. |
| 00:52:38 |
I was an extra in an |
| 00:52:41 |
I regret it now, but |
| 00:52:45 |
Dana Marsha? |
| 00:52:46 |
Marschz. Yes? |
| 00:52:48 |
Consider yourself served. |
| 00:52:50 |
Thank you. |
| 00:52:51 |
What a nice man. A smile costs nothing. |
| 00:52:55 |
Oh, shit, this is a cease and |
| 00:52:58 |
What does that mean? |
| 00:52:59 |
That means you can be arrested |
| 00:53:01 |
Hey, hey, hey. Hey, |
| 00:53:23 |
All right, mystery man. |
| 00:53:25 |
Why have you brought us here? |
| 00:53:26 |
Yeah. |
| 00:53:28 |
Yeah, why? |
| 00:53:29 |
This is Joy Junction. |
| 00:53:30 |
You know, that positive ionic flow. |
| 00:53:32 |
Jean-Paul, the crew, Burning |
| 00:53:36 |
So? |
| 00:53:37 |
Yeah, yo. |
| 00:53:38 |
Yeah, yo. |
| 00:53:41 |
Okay, you started to say something |
| 00:53:42 |
and didn't finish your sentence. |
| 00:53:44 |
You didn't? No, no, you. |
| 00:53:45 |
No, I know you. |
| 00:53:47 |
No, N-O, "no." |
| 00:53:48 |
No, no, more yes. You know, less no. |
| 00:53:50 |
Okay, I'm a little cuckoo-bananas here. |
| 00:53:54 |
Look, they throw parties here. |
| 00:53:56 |
The promoters are at Burning Man. |
| 00:53:57 |
We can use the space. |
| 00:53:59 |
Oh! |
| 00:54:08 |
He does lighting and stuff |
| 00:54:12 |
he acts like a huge dumbass, |
| 00:54:15 |
but he really knows what he's doing. |
| 00:54:22 |
Let there be light. |
| 00:54:25 |
Ah! My eyes! |
| 00:54:33 |
Mr. Marashka? |
| 00:54:35 |
Who? It's Marschz. Yes. |
| 00:54:39 |
Cricket Feldstein, American |
| 00:54:42 |
We spoke on the phone. |
| 00:54:45 |
The ACLU. |
| 00:54:46 |
Oh, I thought you were a |
| 00:54:49 |
But totally not disappointed. |
| 00:54:52 |
If you're wondering about the |
| 00:54:55 |
It's my understanding |
| 00:54:57 |
trying to stop you from |
| 00:55:00 |
You received a cease and desist order |
| 00:55:02 |
in regards to this performance? |
| 00:55:03 |
Yes. |
| 00:55:04 |
I think we have a First Amendment |
| 00:55:07 |
It's Marschz. You really think so? |
| 00:55:09 |
Abso-fucking-lutely. |
| 00:55:12 |
No one is shutting down this play. |
| 00:55:14 |
The Justice Department and |
| 00:55:17 |
can suck my balls. |
| 00:55:19 |
What do they have to |
| 00:55:21 |
No, the other thing. |
| 00:55:22 |
I'm a short blond chick, |
| 00:55:24 |
I pick cases that I can |
| 00:55:27 |
Cases with controversy and headlines |
| 00:55:30 |
and steaming piles of |
| 00:55:32 |
Mostly left. How's that sound? |
| 00:55:35 |
Fine. |
| 00:55:39 |
Are you on my side? Yes. |
| 00:55:41 |
Great, let's do it! Okay then. |
| 00:55:43 |
Do I need to sign anything? |
| 00:55:45 |
No, don't sign anything! |
| 00:55:51 |
I think the play's gonna be really good. |
| 00:55:53 |
It's irrelevant. |
| 00:55:54 |
Okay. |
| 00:56:04 |
Goddamn gravel! The |
| 00:56:13 |
Brights! |
| 00:56:22 |
Oh, my God! |
| 00:56:37 |
Shut down that piece of shit play. |
| 00:56:46 |
Bruised, but not broken. |
| 00:56:51 |
Turns out my play has |
| 00:56:54 |
but I shall not be deterred. |
| 00:56:55 |
Dana. |
| 00:56:56 |
Hang on, I'm going to |
| 00:56:58 |
Dana. I have had, hands down, |
| 00:57:01 |
the worst day ever. |
| 00:57:04 |
Hey, there's no delicate |
| 00:57:09 |
Except Gary and I are |
| 00:57:12 |
and we're moving out now. |
| 00:57:14 |
Yeah, I'm gonna run myself a big Arthur |
| 00:57:17 |
I'm sorry. |
| 00:57:19 |
And I'm gonna put on my top hat, |
| 00:57:20 |
and wish all my troubles |
| 00:57:23 |
That's what I'm gonna do. |
| 00:57:25 |
Didn't you hear what I just said? |
| 00:57:27 |
Yes, I did, funny bunny. |
| 00:57:29 |
Dana. |
| 00:57:30 |
We're packed, we're leaving. |
| 00:57:33 |
We're moving to San Diego. |
| 00:57:36 |
God, I almost believe you. |
| 00:57:38 |
Believe it! |
| 00:57:41 |
But why? You're my wife. |
| 00:57:43 |
Your wife is leaving you. |
| 00:57:49 |
Gary and I have been getting |
| 00:57:52 |
and turns out we are very compatible. |
| 00:57:56 |
As long as he keeps |
| 00:57:59 |
Look, you've been so busy with |
| 00:58:04 |
So, don't sweat it. It's... |
| 00:58:07 |
You'll be much happier without me. |
| 00:58:11 |
What about the baby? |
| 00:58:15 |
The doctor told me a while ago |
| 00:58:17 |
that you've been shooting blanks. |
| 00:58:19 |
I should have said something. |
| 00:58:25 |
That must mean... |
| 00:58:32 |
Wow. |
| 00:58:33 |
Yeah. |
| 00:58:35 |
Yeah. |
| 00:58:42 |
Brie, I'm starting to think |
| 00:58:47 |
Just wake up, okay? |
| 00:58:54 |
Left you a protein shake in the fridge. |
| 00:58:57 |
Gary, let's go. |
| 00:58:58 |
It's strawberry. |
| 00:59:13 |
Electric and phone |
| 00:59:16 |
and the rent's due on Thursday. |
| 00:59:21 |
Good luck with the play. |
| 00:59:26 |
You really will be |
| 00:59:34 |
Come on. |
| 00:59:46 |
She's a maniac |
| 00:59:50 |
Maniac on the floor |
| 00:59:56 |
And she's dancing like |
| 01:00:45 |
Oh, boy. |
| 01:01:03 |
Fuck! |
| 01:01:10 |
Hey, what's cheap and strong? |
| 01:01:15 |
Grain alcohol. |
| 01:01:20 |
I feel like I'm in a cage. |
| 01:01:23 |
And I feel like Nicolas |
| 01:01:30 |
Starring my good friend, Elisabeth Shue. |
| 01:01:33 |
$8.40. |
| 01:01:42 |
I'm sorry. Sorry about that. |
| 01:01:46 |
Can I use your bathroom? |
| 01:01:48 |
No. |
| 01:01:52 |
Hey, we got the TVs. |
| 01:01:55 |
There's a hundred sets in there, woman! |
| 01:01:57 |
Where did you get them all? |
| 01:01:58 |
Stole them from white folks, dawg. |
| 01:02:00 |
I have to say something, guys. |
| 01:02:03 |
I really think Mr. Marschz is bipolar. |
| 01:02:05 |
Just like my cousin. |
| 01:02:06 |
But she takes pills. |
| 01:02:08 |
He's not bipolar. He's a freak. |
| 01:02:10 |
Do you think he realizes that |
| 01:02:13 |
he's flashing his balls at us? |
| 01:02:14 |
You know, where is he anyway? |
| 01:02:16 |
He was supposed to |
| 01:02:18 |
Maybe he's out shopping for a dress. |
| 01:02:20 |
He should buy some underwear. |
| 01:02:24 |
Who do you think you are |
| 01:02:28 |
I heard everything. I heard everything! |
| 01:02:36 |
I haven't bought an item |
| 01:02:38 |
because I don't get paid for this job. |
| 01:02:39 |
Did you know that? |
| 01:02:42 |
I work for gas money, |
| 01:02:48 |
That and the DUI. |
| 01:02:55 |
My life is a parody of a tragedy! |
| 01:03:00 |
My wife left me. Baby wasn't mine. |
| 01:03:06 |
People are trying to run me over. |
| 01:03:09 |
What are we supposed to do? |
| 01:03:13 |
It doesn't matter. |
| 01:03:15 |
We're not gonna get this play on. |
| 01:03:17 |
We might as well give up now! |
| 01:03:19 |
What? |
| 01:03:20 |
He works for gas money? |
| 01:03:23 |
That is so sad. |
| 01:03:32 |
Mr. M! |
| 01:03:34 |
Mr. M! |
| 01:03:36 |
What happened? |
| 01:03:38 |
Get away from me, you devil bitches. |
| 01:03:42 |
Leave me to the vultures. |
| 01:03:45 |
Pussy! |
| 01:03:49 |
Yolanda. |
| 01:03:51 |
You come in here and tell |
| 01:03:54 |
and put on your crazy-ass play, |
| 01:03:56 |
and when things get a little |
| 01:04:05 |
Yolanda, you don't say much, but |
| 01:04:09 |
She's right! |
| 01:04:10 |
Okay, you've had a pretty |
| 01:04:13 |
But that doesn't mean you give up. |
| 01:04:14 |
Why not? |
| 01:04:15 |
Nobody cares. |
| 01:04:17 |
Yeah, we do. |
| 01:04:18 |
I don't want your pity. |
| 01:04:21 |
Man, you keep talking about |
| 01:04:24 |
That's from Dead Poets. |
| 01:04:26 |
Well, you're teaching us |
| 01:04:29 |
I am? What is it? |
| 01:04:31 |
It doesn't matter how |
| 01:04:32 |
as long as we have enthusiasm. |
| 01:04:34 |
That's truth. Because I lack talent. |
| 01:04:37 |
The football team, the wrestling team |
| 01:04:41 |
and all the seniors are |
| 01:04:44 |
and kick the asses of anyone |
| 01:04:47 |
Yeah. And I got some friends |
| 01:04:49 |
just in case we have any |
| 01:04:51 |
And we're also sold out. |
| 01:04:55 |
What? |
| 01:04:56 |
Mr. M, you're not getting it. |
| 01:04:58 |
Like, all the tickets were bought. |
| 01:04:59 |
Channel 5 is coming. |
| 01:05:00 |
And I got a call from one |
| 01:05:02 |
something about permission. |
| 01:05:04 |
And there was a message from |
| 01:05:08 |
Mr. M, |
| 01:05:12 |
we don't wanna give up. |
| 01:05:15 |
I just get scared. |
| 01:05:18 |
Every time I try to go for something, |
| 01:05:19 |
my heart gets stomped |
| 01:05:24 |
That's no reason to give up. |
| 01:05:26 |
Maybe it is. No, it's not. |
| 01:05:37 |
Help him up. |
| 01:05:44 |
Let's go to work. |
| 01:05:49 |
Okay, hey, guys, my skate is stuck. |
| 01:05:58 |
I'm such a dick. |
| 01:06:10 |
Wait, what are you doing? Let go of me. |
| 01:06:13 |
I'm not interested in this |
| 01:06:17 |
Ticket holders only. |
| 01:06:19 |
This event is sold out. |
| 01:06:21 |
If you don't have a ticket, |
| 01:06:24 |
I am revoking permission |
| 01:06:27 |
I am, too. |
| 01:06:28 |
And so am I. |
| 01:06:30 |
But why now? |
| 01:06:31 |
I heard the play was disgusting. |
| 01:06:33 |
How can you say that |
| 01:06:36 |
What about this Sexy Jesus song? |
| 01:06:38 |
I mean, that's just disrespectful. |
| 01:06:40 |
Look, it's about if Jesus |
| 01:06:44 |
he would have to market |
| 01:06:47 |
It's very thoughtful. |
| 01:06:48 |
That's an oversimplification, but... |
| 01:06:50 |
I don't care to see my son |
| 01:06:54 |
I'm doing this play for my own reasons. |
| 01:06:56 |
You know, according to the |
| 01:06:58 |
if you sign a consent form, |
| 01:07:00 |
And you can't take that form back, |
| 01:07:02 |
you can't take your signature off it. |
| 01:07:03 |
You signed it, you signed consent. |
| 01:07:05 |
So end of deal, okay. End of story. |
| 01:07:06 |
Sorry, you guys, but |
| 01:07:08 |
You don't control our kids! |
| 01:07:10 |
Wake up call! You |
| 01:07:14 |
Now get out of my performance space, |
| 01:07:15 |
before I have security, |
| 01:07:18 |
remove your sorry asses. |
| 01:07:25 |
How did you get the balls to do that? |
| 01:07:27 |
I'm still a little drunk. |
| 01:07:49 |
What if I have to go to the bathroom? |
| 01:07:51 |
Okay, I'll just piss on |
| 01:07:57 |
Welcome to West Mesa High |
| 01:08:02 |
If you are moved by tonight's work, |
| 01:08:05 |
please go forward and |
| 01:08:09 |
Eat shit and die, you tramp. |
| 01:08:13 |
Let go of me! Hey, hands off! |
| 01:08:16 |
And please take this opportunity |
| 01:08:28 |
It's the celestial message. |
| 01:08:30 |
The portal to infinity is wide open. |
| 01:08:43 |
Yeah! Fuck yeah! |
| 01:09:38 |
Look. I studied French at Vassar. |
| 01:09:39 |
I'm not getting any of this. |
| 01:09:42 |
Well, can you give us an update? |
| 01:09:45 |
Free speech is alive and well in Tucson, |
| 01:09:48 |
so go and tell the mundo. |
| 01:09:51 |
I think it's going terrific. |
| 01:09:53 |
Are people still walking out? |
| 01:09:57 |
Mr. Marschz, |
| 01:09:58 |
this is the most important theatrical |
| 01:10:01 |
I have to be a part of it. |
| 01:10:03 |
Rand, that is a very brave |
| 01:10:06 |
Piff took the fries. |
| 01:10:08 |
I've been going to a |
| 01:10:10 |
and I started on anti-depressants |
| 01:10:12 |
and I'm much more |
| 01:10:16 |
I'd be happy to play |
| 01:10:19 |
That's wonderful! |
| 01:10:21 |
And I forgive you. |
| 01:10:29 |
Okay. Stop it. Go get changed. |
| 01:10:31 |
Okay. |
| 01:10:36 |
Sometimes I feel like |
| 01:10:44 |
I think my heart-soul |
| 01:10:51 |
Therapy's taken me to a better place |
| 01:10:57 |
So why do I feel, why do I feel |
| 01:11:03 |
Why do I feel like I've |
| 01:11:10 |
Raped in the face? |
| 01:11:12 |
Maybe it's buried emotions |
| 01:11:15 |
Or maybe the wrong medication |
| 01:11:18 |
I simply go through the motions |
| 01:11:22 |
They say I need a vacation |
| 01:11:27 |
I really do feel like a sexual victim |
| 01:11:30 |
With dark memories of a rigid dictum |
| 01:11:33 |
This is disgusting! Shut up! |
| 01:11:35 |
This means I love you, he murmured |
| 01:11:38 |
This will be our little secret |
| 01:11:42 |
You'll wind up horribly murdered |
| 01:11:45 |
If you should dare not to keep it |
| 01:11:50 |
I know the topic of rape isn't nice |
| 01:11:56 |
Don't bring it up when |
| 01:12:02 |
Is that why you are so quick to decline |
| 01:12:08 |
To hear this oral fixation of mine? |
| 01:12:14 |
My head spins like a |
| 01:12:17 |
If I'm lost then I'll |
| 01:12:21 |
When they force you to |
| 01:12:25 |
When you're being |
| 01:12:26 |
Raped in the face |
| 01:12:57 |
He's totally the man |
| 01:13:00 |
He traveled through time |
| 01:13:04 |
Moralistically, he taught us to be good |
| 01:13:07 |
How to set our souls free |
| 01:13:12 |
Now we do the right deeds |
| 01:13:14 |
And we stopped smoking weed |
| 01:13:19 |
And we can't forget to |
| 01:13:22 |
Do unto others as you would have them |
| 01:13:25 |
Slam, bam, spank you, ma'am |
| 01:13:27 |
Do unto you! |
| 01:13:32 |
Oh, my God, it's Jesus! |
| 01:13:34 |
Oh, my God, it's Jesus! |
| 01:13:39 |
You're so hot! My God, I love you! |
| 01:13:42 |
I wanna party with you, Jesus. |
| 01:13:44 |
Jesus. |
| 01:13:46 |
Rock me, rock me, rock me, sexy Jesus |
| 01:13:49 |
You died for our sins |
| 01:13:52 |
Rock me, rock me, rock me, sexy Jesus |
| 01:13:55 |
All night long |
| 01:13:57 |
I'm simultaneously |
| 01:14:01 |
We're really amazed |
| 01:14:04 |
Rock me, rock me, rock me, sexy Jesus |
| 01:14:05 |
Blasphemy! Blasphemy! |
