Horse Feathers
|
00:01:01 |
And so, in retiring as president |
00:01:06 |
it is indeed a painful task |
00:01:10 |
And now, with the utmost pleasure, |
00:01:13 |
may I present the man who is to guide |
00:01:18 |
Professor Quincy Adams Wagstaff! |
00:01:28 |
Professor, it is an honor |
00:01:32 |
Never mind that, hold this coat. |
00:01:38 |
By the way, there's no smoking. |
00:01:41 |
That's what you said. |
00:01:46 |
It would please the faculty |
00:01:49 |
The faculty can keep their seats. |
00:01:55 |
Members of the faculty, |
00:01:58 |
students of Huxley |
00:02:00 |
I guess that covers everything. |
00:02:02 |
I thought my razor was dull |
00:02:05 |
Which reminds me of a story so dirty |
00:02:09 |
As I look at your faces, I understand |
00:02:14 |
At my last college, it was slightly |
00:02:19 |
Things went from bad to worse, |
00:02:21 |
and soon I was flat on my back again. |
00:02:24 |
Any questions? Any answers? |
00:02:26 |
Any rags? Any bones? |
00:02:30 |
Let's have some action around here. |
00:02:34 |
That's the spirit! 1776! |
00:02:37 |
You'd like to know why I'm here. |
00:02:39 |
I came here to get my son out. |
00:02:41 |
I remember the day he left: |
00:02:45 |
I kissed them both goodbye. |
00:02:50 |
Young lady, would you get up |
00:02:55 |
So, doing your homework in school, eh? |
00:03:00 |
I'm sure the students would appreciate |
00:03:05 |
What? - I said they would appreciate |
00:03:10 |
You just said that. That's the trouble |
00:03:13 |
I think I must go mad. Where will it |
00:03:18 |
Go home to your wife. |
00:03:21 |
Outside of the improvement, |
00:03:23 |
Pull over to the side of the road |
00:03:27 |
President Wagstaff, now that you |
00:03:31 |
Oh, is that what I stepped in? |
00:03:34 |
At least you could have cleaned them. |
00:03:38 |
I think you know what the trustees |
00:03:43 |
"I don't know what they have to say, |
00:03:47 |
Whatever it is, I'm against it. |
00:03:50 |
No matter what it is and who |
00:03:56 |
Your proposition may be good, but |
00:04:01 |
I'm against it! |
00:04:02 |
And even when you've changed it |
00:04:08 |
I'm opposed to it. |
00:04:11 |
On general principles opposed to it." |
00:04:13 |
"He's opposed to it. In fact it seems |
00:04:21 |
"For months before my son was born, |
00:04:25 |
Whatever it is, I'm against it! |
00:04:28 |
And I've kept yelling since I first |
00:04:39 |
"Knowing Dad as I do, |
00:04:43 |
to displease him, or tease him. |
00:04:48 |
Don't double-cross him |
00:04:54 |
When dear old Dad once gets mad |
00:04:59 |
he's a hound!" |
00:05:03 |
"My son is right, I'm quick to fight, |
00:05:06 |
When I'm abused or badly used, |
00:05:12 |
No matter if he's in |
00:05:15 |
I go ahead, alive or dead, |
00:05:18 |
"He goes ahead, alive or dead, |
00:05:23 |
"I soon dispose of all of those |
00:05:26 |
As Shakespeare said to Nathan Hale: |
00:05:58 |
"He always gets his man!" |
00:06:00 |
"That's what I said." |
00:06:03 |
"That's what I mean." |
00:06:06 |
"You're telling me?" - "He always gets |
00:06:13 |
"He gets his man! He gets his man!" |
00:06:16 |
"I always get, I always get, |
00:06:18 |
I always get, |
00:06:23 |
I always get my man!" |
00:06:32 |
Splendid, Professor! |
00:06:35 |
Marvellous! - Alright scram, boys, |
00:06:43 |
Dad, let me congratulate you. |
00:06:46 |
My boy, you took the words out of my |
00:06:51 |
You're a disgrace to the family name |
00:06:55 |
What's this about you fooling around |
00:06:58 |
No wonder you've been 12 years |
00:07:01 |
I went to 3 colleges in 12 years |
00:07:05 |
At your age |
00:07:07 |
Sometimes before supper. Or I went |
00:07:12 |
A college widow stood for something |
00:07:15 |
There's nothing between me and her. |
00:07:19 |
But... - I don't want to talk to you |
00:07:22 |
I'd horsewhip you, if I had a horse. |
00:07:26 |
Leave your name with the girl outside. |
00:07:30 |
Where are you going? |
00:07:33 |
That's what they teach you here? |
00:07:36 |
You know you can't leave a school-room |
00:07:40 |
This school has had a new president |
00:07:43 |
when we won our last football game. |
00:07:45 |
I like education as well as the next |
00:07:49 |
...but besides education, this |
00:07:54 |
And for a good football team, you need |
00:07:59 |
I think you've got something. I'll |
00:08:02 |
One more question: Where do you get |
00:08:06 |
In the speakeasy... |
00:08:08 |
Isn't that against the law, selling |
00:08:12 |
Two of the best players in the country |
00:08:15 |
You suggest that I go there, |
00:08:20 |
42, Elm Street. But you can't |
00:08:23 |
It's not right for a college to buy |
00:08:27 |
Well, come on and we'll have a nip. |
00:08:31 |
Anything further, Father? - "Anything |
00:08:35 |
Isn't it "Anything Father, further?" |
00:08:38 |
your mother because I wanted children. |
00:08:44 |
"And I kept yelling since I first |
00:09:00 |
That's my proposition. How about it? |
00:09:03 |
It's OK with us, Mr. Jennings, but |
00:09:06 |
how are you gonna fix it? |
00:09:09 |
You'll be entered as Darwin students |
00:09:13 |
Yeah, but how about the dough? |
00:09:17 |
You get the balance after the game. |
00:09:21 |
Huxley can't win. - You said it! |
00:09:27 |
Alright boys, let's go. |
00:09:32 |
Bye. |
00:09:36 |
Baravelli! |
00:09:45 |
Hello? |
00:09:47 |
Yes, lady, this is Baravelli, |
00:09:51 |
One quart of scotch, |
00:09:55 |
Hold on, I see if I got 'em. |
00:09:59 |
One quart of scotch. |
00:10:01 |
One quart of rye. |
00:10:03 |
OK, lady, I send 'em right over. |
00:10:16 |
Hey, Baravelli! |
00:10:23 |
What do ya want? |
00:10:26 |
And don't let anyone in |
00:10:29 |
What is it? |
00:10:32 |
OK, I got it. |
00:10:34 |
Swordfish! Swordfish. |
00:10:43 |
Who are you? - I'm fine. Who are you? |
00:10:48 |
Well, what is the password? |
00:10:51 |
I tell what I do, |
00:10:55 |
It's the name of a fish. |
00:10:59 |
That's no fish! |
00:11:02 |
Let me see. Is it sturgeon? |
00:11:05 |
You crazy! A sturgeon, he's a doctor, |
00:11:08 |
You got one more chance. |
00:11:12 |
Funny, I gotta haddock too. - What do |
00:11:18 |
I'd walk a mile for a calomel. |
00:11:21 |
But you no guess it. |
00:11:25 |
Hey, you no understand English? |
00:11:29 |
Now, I give you one more guess. |
00:11:33 |
I think I got it. Is it swordfish? |
00:11:38 |
Pretty good, eh? |
00:11:43 |
What do you want? - To come in. |
00:11:48 |
Swordfish. - No, I got tired of that. |
00:11:52 |
What's the password now? |
00:12:09 |
Buddy, can you help me out? |
00:12:17 |
Hey, here comes my partner. |
00:12:20 |
Hey, Pinky, |
00:12:22 |
do you know the password? |
00:12:31 |
Get up. That's no way to go into |
00:13:13 |
Hey, what'll you have? |
00:13:16 |
He'll take a scotch. |
00:13:18 |
I got it! Swordfish. |
00:13:50 |
Cut the cards. |
00:13:57 |
Now, to business. I'm looking for two |
00:14:01 |
We hang around here... |
00:14:04 |
Prof. Wagstaff from Huxley College. |
00:14:07 |
Means nothing to me, either. |
00:14:10 |
I'm Prof. Huxley |
00:14:13 |
You didn't stay at the other one long. |
00:14:15 |
Why don't you pull yourself to pieces? |
00:15:04 |
In case I never see you again, |
00:15:09 |
First we want a football. |
00:15:12 |
If we had, would you be interested? |
00:15:16 |
I no think I can sleep on a football. |
00:15:22 |
You're stuck. - Can you cash a check |
00:15:34 |
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty-two. |
00:15:37 |
As soon as I get the check, |
00:15:48 |
Laura! |
00:15:50 |
Am I too early? - No, shall I tell |
00:15:54 |
Give me the tray. |
00:16:04 |
Your breakfast, Madam. Anything else? |
00:16:06 |
Yes, put some cream in my coffee, |
00:16:11 |
Busy arguing with Dad about you. |
00:16:15 |
Well, what about me? |
00:16:19 |
You're interfering with my studies. |
00:16:22 |
He must think I'm terrible. |
00:16:26 |
Are you making love to me? |
00:16:30 |
"Everyone says I love you, the cop |
00:16:36 |
the preacher in the pulpit and the man |
00:16:44 |
Everyone, no matter who, |
00:16:51 |
the captain and the sailor and the |
00:16:58 |
There are only 8 little letters |
00:17:03 |
you will find, |
00:17:05 |
but they mean a lot more |
00:17:13 |
Everywhere the whole world through, |
00:17:20 |
The tiger in the jungle and the monk |
00:18:27 |
Get that crate out of here! |
00:18:32 |
Blocking traffic, holding up cars... |
00:18:42 |
You know what I'm going to do to you? |
00:18:44 |
You're a wise guy, ain't you? |
00:18:49 |
You see that badge? |
00:19:38 |
And I say to you, gentlemen, |
00:19:41 |
Trouble is we're neglecting football |
00:19:47 |
No, I'm wrong. |
00:19:50 |
Now I know |
00:19:54 |
There's too much football, and not |
00:19:58 |
Wrong again! If there was a snake here |
00:20:02 |
Where would the college be |
00:20:05 |
Have we got a stadium? - Yes. |
00:20:08 |
Well, we can't support both. |
00:20:11 |
But where will the students sleep? |
00:20:15 |
Professor, the Dean of Science |
00:20:18 |
He said he's tired of |
00:20:21 |
Tell him |
00:20:25 |
Now, where were we? Oh yes. |
00:20:29 |
How much am I paying you fellas? |
00:20:33 |
In that case, I'll raise it to 8,000. |
00:20:39 |
The Dean's furious. He's waxing wroth! |
00:20:42 |
Is Wroth there, too? |
00:20:45 |
Guess that's bad, eh? |
00:20:49 |
It's about your son. |
00:20:51 |
I'm afraid he's paying |
00:20:55 |
and too much to Connie Bailey. |
00:20:58 |
I'll put a stop to that. |
00:21:01 |
Either of you weasels got her number? |
00:21:08 |
Get me Maine 4-9970 |
00:21:11 |
You may go now. Drop this |
00:21:16 |
Hello, I want to speak to Miss Bailey. |
00:21:20 |
Why, of course I know your son. |
00:21:25 |
Why, that's silly. |
00:21:31 |
Professor, I don't understand. |
00:21:33 |
You don't? Come over to my office. |
00:21:36 |
You're in bed? In that case, |
00:21:55 |
Where are your tongs? |
00:22:01 |
No more ice until you pay the bill. |
00:22:03 |
How much do we owe you? |
00:22:07 |
I can get an Eskimo for $200 |
00:22:20 |
I tell you what: You owe us 200. |
00:22:25 |
I'll consult my lawyer. If he tells me |
00:22:30 |
Forget about the money. Go to college, |
00:22:35 |
I gotta co-ed last week for $18, |
00:22:39 |
Since when has a co-ed two pairs |
00:22:43 |
Baravelli, you've got the brain |
00:22:47 |
Now that you're a college boy, |
00:22:50 |
your pennant, your coat. |
00:22:59 |
Report for football practice in the |
00:23:03 |
There's nothing on this paper. |
00:23:08 |
Here, put your name on there. |
00:23:12 |
Wait a minute, this isn't legal. |
00:23:16 |
Where's the seal? |
00:23:26 |
And thus we see that the function |
00:23:30 |
is to transmit oxygen |
00:23:33 |
which is called osmosis... |
00:23:36 |
Have they started |
00:23:39 |
Mr President, what a pleasure! |
00:23:42 |
A bicycle, but I left it in the hall. |
00:23:47 |
Come in, dunces. |
00:23:54 |
Well, all you need now |
00:23:56 |
Find yourselves a couple of seats. |
00:24:07 |
Now, let us go on with our lecture. |
00:24:10 |
I wish you'd go on |
00:24:13 |
What do you think of that slide? |
00:24:19 |
Now, the circulatory system! |
00:24:21 |
Here is the liver. |
00:24:24 |
What, no bacon? |
00:24:27 |
The liver, if neglected, |
00:24:31 |
You are all familiar |
00:24:34 |
Sure! So roses are red, |
00:24:37 |
so sugar is sweet, |
00:24:39 |
I bet I know who it is. |
00:24:42 |
To protect the heart, or cardium, |
00:24:45 |
Mother Nature has provided a sac, |
00:24:49 |
Any questions? |
00:24:50 |
Yes. When you gonna |
00:24:54 |
Psychopathically, |
00:24:59 |
to the coordination of the palyphus. |
00:25:02 |
Is this stuff on the level, or are you |
00:25:07 |
Why, everything I told you can be |
00:25:10 |
I'm sure my students will bear me out. |
00:25:19 |
Let that be a lesson to all of you. |
00:25:22 |
This school |
00:25:25 |
That goes for you, too. |
00:25:37 |
Leave me alone! |
00:25:43 |
Let us follow a corpuscle |
00:25:47 |
Oh, my mistake, |
00:25:50 |
There is constant warfare |
00:25:53 |
Now, baboons, what is a corpuscle? |
00:25:57 |
There's a captain, then a lieutenant, |
00:26:01 |
That's fine. Why don't you bore a hole |
00:26:07 |
We now find ourselves among the Alps, |
00:26:13 |
Beyond are more Alps, and the Lord |
00:26:17 |
The blood rushes from the head to the |
00:26:20 |
and rushes back to the head again. |
00:26:23 |
This is known as auction pinochle. |
00:26:26 |
We first listen to your hearts beat, |
00:26:30 |
but diamonds and clubs, your partner |
00:26:34 |
Now take this point, for instance... |
00:26:38 |
That reminds me. Where's my son? |
00:26:41 |
Well, the human body |
00:26:45 |
Now, here is a most unusual organ. |
00:26:47 |
The organ will play a solo |
00:26:51 |
Scientists examine rats, or |
00:26:55 |
And what do they find? Asparagus. |
00:26:57 |
Now, on closer examination... |
00:27:01 |
This needs closer examination. |
00:27:03 |
In fact, it needs a nightgown. |
00:27:05 |
Baravelli, who did this? |
00:27:08 |
It doesn't look like me. |
00:27:11 |
and hang it in my bedroom. |
00:27:16 |
So you're the culprit. |
00:27:18 |
Young man, you can't |
00:27:25 |
Well, I was wrong. |
00:27:28 |
Well, you must be punished. |
00:27:31 |
But I didn't do anything. |
00:27:33 |
I know, but there's no fun |
00:27:37 |
Now, we'll have no more interruptions. |
00:27:40 |
According to von Steinmetz, |
00:27:45 |
phagocytes... |
00:27:51 |
According to von Steinmetz, |
00:27:54 |
er, phagocytes... |
00:28:00 |
According to von... |
00:28:02 |
According to von Steinmetz... |
00:28:08 |
According to von Steinmetz, a group |
00:28:14 |
And they are essential |
00:28:21 |
My left wing has been turned, |
00:28:24 |
But I'll fight it out on these lines... |
00:28:37 |
Hello. |
00:28:38 |
Oh, it's you, Frank. |
00:28:42 |
Why, of course, |
00:28:45 |
Alright, I'll be expecting you then. |
00:28:48 |
Goodbye, darling. |
00:28:50 |
Who are you calling "darling"? |
00:28:55 |
I didn't tell you to fall for him, |
00:28:59 |
He says Huxley will win. |
00:29:02 |
I've got my bankroll bet on Darwin, |
00:29:06 |
Before the game starts |
00:29:09 |
Down the hatch and on my way. |
00:29:16 |
See you later. |
00:29:18 |
Bye, dear. |
00:29:35 |
Are you still here. |
00:29:40 |
What do you mean, am I still here? |
00:29:45 |
I shouldn't be here. The old man |
00:29:49 |
Don't worry about him, |
00:29:53 |
How about a little drink? |
00:30:12 |
Are you Miss Bailey? |
00:30:14 |
Come, come, one of us is! |
00:30:18 |
I'm Prof. Wagstoff. Who are you? |
00:30:21 |
Then you are Miss Bailey. |
00:30:24 |
You've got to give my son up. |
00:30:27 |
He's all I've got, apart from |
00:30:32 |
But... - Lies! He's a shell of his |
00:30:36 |
I tell you you're ruining him. |
00:30:39 |
Did he tell you that you have |
00:30:43 |
Told me that, too. Tells everyone! |
00:30:46 |
I could sit on your lap all day |
00:30:50 |
Quick, get out! That door. |
00:31:01 |
I don't want any ice. |
00:31:15 |
Who was that? - The ice man. |
00:31:20 |
The ice man leaves me cold. |
00:31:23 |
Here you are... |
00:31:25 |
You are fooling around with her. |
00:31:29 |
A son taking a dame from his father. |
00:31:33 |
I'll settle with this woman, then |
00:31:38 |
Follow me. |
00:31:46 |
Be a lamp in the window |
00:31:50 |
Where were we? |
00:31:53 |
And doing pretty well, as I recall it. |
00:31:57 |
Hurry, get out! Hurry! |
00:32:00 |
And remember, stay undercover. |
00:32:08 |
You dropped your ice. |
00:32:09 |
I don't want any ice! |
00:32:17 |
Now do you want any ice? |
00:32:19 |
Oh, you're beautiful. |
00:32:25 |
You're overcoming me. |
00:32:29 |
I like you. You got something. |
00:32:32 |
I'm gonna tell him he's crazy. |
00:32:43 |
Professor, what are you doing here? |
00:32:45 |
Nothing, since you came in. |
00:32:48 |
You know him? |
00:32:51 |
Now I just have to get him |
00:32:55 |
Read any good books lately? |
00:33:09 |
This must be the main highway. |
00:33:14 |
Follow me, |
00:33:22 |
Pretty popular place. - Yeah, |
00:33:26 |
What are you doing here? |
00:33:30 |
Since when? |
00:33:32 |
And you? - I'm the plumber. In case |
00:33:37 |
I haven't used that joke for 20 years. |
00:33:39 |
Take a deep breath and follow me. |
00:33:53 |
Cosy place we have here. |
00:34:04 |
You sing high, eh? |
00:34:07 |
My last pupil, |
00:34:10 |
So maybe it's better you don't sing. |
00:34:13 |
That's much better. I'll sing. |
00:34:16 |
"Everyone says I love you, |
00:34:18 |
the big mosquito when he sting you, |
00:34:21 |
the fly when he's stuck on |
00:34:26 |
Every time the cow says "moo", |
00:34:31 |
and the rooster when he holler |
00:34:37 |
Christopher Columbo, he write |
00:34:42 |
he say how I love you, then he get |
00:34:47 |
What you think Columbo do, |
00:34:53 |
He says to Pocahontas, atch-a catchy |
00:34:59 |
Maybe it's better I don't sing, too. |
00:35:04 |
I love good music. - So do I, |
00:35:09 |
I've got to stay here. But you folks |
00:36:21 |
Well, that's all for the first lesson. |
00:36:25 |
Don't breathe before then. |
00:36:28 |
If this is a singing lesson, |
00:36:31 |
Keep your family out of it. Baravelli! |
00:36:34 |
Are you going my way? - Yes. |
00:36:37 |
No you don't. And if I find you here |
00:36:44 |
Tell my son to take that lamp down. |
00:36:56 |
Dad! |
00:36:57 |
You've got the wrong football players. |
00:37:00 |
No, Baravelli and the dog catcher. |
00:37:03 |
But I got them in the speakeasy. |
00:37:07 |
The ones I told you about are playing |
00:37:11 |
Don't leave a stone unturned. |
00:37:19 |
Baravelli! |
00:37:23 |
...2671, 57, 84, 59, 71... |
00:37:28 |
What are you doing in there? |
00:37:34 |
Come on out. |
00:37:36 |
What do you want? - You can fix it |
00:37:39 |
I want to play. - Alright, but listen. |
00:37:44 |
Have you any experience in kidnapping? |
00:37:49 |
First I call them up, |
00:37:52 |
What kind of a car you got? |
00:37:54 |
I no got a car, just a chauffeur. |
00:37:57 |
But when you have a chauffeur, |
00:38:01 |
Well, I had, but it cost too much, |
00:38:06 |
I would have kept the car. |
00:38:09 |
I gotta have a chauffeur |
00:38:13 |
How can he take you to work? |
00:38:15 |
He don't have to. I no gotta job. |
00:38:18 |
That's it. How much would you want |
00:38:24 |
Now just a minute, boys. |
00:38:30 |
You have to, I've taken my coat off. |
00:38:33 |
You wouldn't mind stepping out? |
00:38:36 |
I'd love to, |
00:38:38 |
I've got a proposition. - Watch out, |
00:38:43 |
Let's go in here. |
00:38:49 |
I want you to do something for me. |
00:38:52 |
We gotta kidnap a couple of players |
00:38:56 |
Is that so? |
00:39:00 |
Sounds like it. But the fellas I mean |
00:39:03 |
Let me give you a tip. |
00:39:08 |
Thanks! - Now, I want you |
00:39:12 |
What do you want? |
00:39:14 |
give me the signals, |
00:39:18 |
Alright. |
00:39:20 |
Here's the signals. |
00:39:24 |
Want a minute, |
00:39:27 |
You think I'd give you 500 dollars |
00:39:30 |
They cost me 200. |
00:42:52 |
Listen, you gotta get busy |
00:42:55 |
I thought you were going to get them. |
00:43:01 |
You just have to get to the professor. |
00:43:05 |
And I'm depending on you to get them. |
00:43:08 |
Yes, but how? |
00:43:12 |
Romance him, baby, romance him. |
00:43:15 |
And remember, all you're to get |
00:43:35 |
"Everyone says I love you, |
00:43:38 |
but just what they say it for, |
00:43:42 |
it's just inviting trouble for |
00:43:51 |
Take a pair of rabbits who |
00:43:55 |
get stuck on each other |
00:43:59 |
and pretty soon you find a million |
00:44:08 |
When a lion gets feeling frisky |
00:44:16 |
there's another lion who knows |
00:44:24 |
Everything that ever grew, the goose |
00:44:32 |
the duck upon the water, |
00:44:39 |
That's a wise quack. |
00:44:42 |
How would you like it |
00:44:51 |
This is my first time in a canoe |
00:44:55 |
You're perfectly safe, Professor, |
00:44:58 |
I was going to get a flat bottom, |
00:45:02 |
I could go on like this |
00:45:07 |
What a day. Spring in the air! |
00:45:10 |
Who, me? And fall in the lake? |
00:45:13 |
Professor, you're full of whimsy. |
00:45:15 |
Can you tell from there? |
00:45:24 |
Is that important? |
00:45:28 |
Those are the football signals. |
00:45:31 |
I've got a duplicate in my pocket. |
00:45:33 |
I always carry two of everything. |
00:45:38 |
You mean |
00:45:41 |
I hate to see a girl walk home alone. |
00:45:44 |
You know, Professor, |
00:45:48 |
You think a little girl like me |
00:45:52 |
I think you could understand anything. |
00:45:55 |
Is the big stwong man |
00:45:58 |
all about the bad football signals? |
00:46:02 |
Was that you or the duck? |
00:46:06 |
If icky baby don't learn |
00:46:09 |
icky baby gonna cry. |
00:46:12 |
If icky girl keep talking that way, |
00:46:14 |
big stwong man |
00:46:18 |
Naughty man is only fooling! |
00:46:21 |
Just for that I'm coming over |
00:46:24 |
to smother him in kisses. |
00:46:30 |
Oh, so that's your game. |
00:46:35 |
Professor Wagstaff! |
00:46:39 |
Just call me Quincy. |
00:46:42 |
Throw me the lifesaver! |
00:46:46 |
Please hurry, Professor. |
00:46:57 |
39. This is it! |
00:47:05 |
Hello. Yeah, this is McHardie. |
00:47:10 |
So they're coming right over? |
00:47:12 |
OK, we'll take care of them. |
00:47:15 |
Jennings says Baravelli and the dog |
00:47:20 |
to keep us out of the game. |
00:47:27 |
This is the place. |
00:47:30 |
No, that's for flies. |
00:47:33 |
We look for football players. |
00:47:36 |
You got the shovel, the axe |
00:47:41 |
No, that's no pick. That's a hog. |
00:47:44 |
Don't you know what a hog is? |
00:47:46 |
Oh, come on, let's get busy. |
00:47:53 |
Mullen und McHardie? |
00:47:55 |
That's us. What can we do for you? |
00:47:58 |
No. |
00:48:01 |
She's a very sick man. |
00:48:04 |
What happened to her? |
00:48:07 |
She crash her automobile. |
00:48:09 |
She has no automobile. - Then she fell |
00:48:13 |
You will? I have no sister. |
00:48:17 |
That's alright. |
00:48:20 |
You think |
00:48:23 |
This is gonna take a long time. |
00:48:28 |
Try one at a time. |
00:48:36 |
Odin't work, eh? |
00:48:39 |
Get tough. |
00:48:42 |
Get tough with the other one. |
00:48:46 |
Get tough with both of them. |
00:48:48 |
Tougher! |
00:49:02 |
Now you're getting someplace. |
00:49:10 |
You better think of something else. |
00:49:16 |
I'm exhausted, too. |
00:49:20 |
Maybe you fellas got an idea? |
00:49:23 |
Where's that rope, Ed? |
00:49:26 |
Get 'em, Ed! |
00:49:38 |
Hey guys, we'll let you know |
00:49:42 |
Now they've kidnapped us! |
00:49:45 |
That's a fix-a fine we're in. |
00:49:48 |
I got an idea. You got a rope? |
00:49:52 |
That's fine. Tie on the bed, |
00:49:56 |
Tie on the bed, |
00:50:01 |
Hey! |
00:50:03 |
What you do? You no tie on the bed. |
00:50:07 |
No, I mean a-tie the rope. |
00:50:10 |
Now what you gonna do? |
00:50:16 |
You crazy! That's a-no good. |
00:50:21 |
You wanna break-a my neck? |
00:50:26 |
Don't worry, Mr. Jennings, |
00:50:30 |
Alright. That game's in the bag. |
00:50:36 |
Wonder what the two mugs |
00:51:13 |
Our little playmates, |
00:51:17 |
We got no cups. See ya after the game. |
00:51:24 |
Take off your coat. Come on. |
00:51:29 |
Quit stallin'. |
00:51:32 |
Now take off your pants. |
00:51:52 |
You too! |
00:51:54 |
Take that coat off. |
00:51:58 |
Stand over there, you. |
00:52:08 |
So, |
00:52:09 |
if you boys'll excuse us, |
00:52:12 |
Tune in on the radio if you |
00:52:19 |
I'll send my sister over |
00:52:27 |
Gee, I guess it's locked. |
00:52:50 |
Boy, what a pretty play. |
00:52:52 |
Darwin's just got a fourth touchdown |
00:52:56 |
There seems to be no stopping |
00:52:59 |
Two minutes left to play |
00:53:01 |
and what a lacing |
00:53:10 |
HcHardie has the ball |
00:53:23 |
I guess we made a grand slam. |
00:54:00 |
Pinky, hurry up. |
00:54:02 |
Come on, we still got time to play. |
00:54:09 |
Fine kidnappers you are. The fellas |
00:54:13 |
Look: 12 to nothing. |
00:54:17 |
Know what it means if Huxley loses? |
00:54:21 |
And you're crazy if you don't |
00:54:25 |
No, no, no, no! Get in that game! |
00:54:31 |
Listen, you butter-fingered milksops! |
00:54:33 |
The way you're playing, you couldn't |
00:54:37 |
We're going to have to use |
00:54:41 |
where the quarterback makes |
00:54:45 |
Dad! - Wait a minute! Boys, |
00:54:48 |
Dad! - What do you want? |
00:54:51 |
I know I am, |
00:54:57 |
Which way you going? - Out there. |
00:55:06 |
Where's your number? |
00:55:13 |
Boy, play like you did last time. |
00:55:34 |
Ready? |
00:55:36 |
Let's go! |
00:55:45 |
Here comes Prof. Wagstaff. |
00:55:47 |
Will you say something? |
00:55:50 |
Professor Wagstaff will tell you |
00:55:54 |
Some football game. I wish |
00:55:58 |
Last week, I told you Mrs. Moskowitz |
00:56:02 |
Last night Mrs Moskowitz had twins. |
00:56:08 |
Thank you, Professor. |
00:56:20 |
The boys are back in the field, |
00:56:23 |
Huxley is about to kick off, |
00:56:25 |
and there they go! |
00:56:44 |
Pardon me. |
00:56:59 |
That'll teach him to pass a lady |
00:57:12 |
Hey, you wanna get hurt? |
00:57:16 |
Signal: 18, 72, forward pass, |
00:57:28 |
Pinky, what are you doing here? |
00:57:33 |
That tackle will cost you 15 yards. |
00:57:36 |
You're supposed to tackle |
00:57:44 |
Hey, idiot, where's that ball? |
00:57:46 |
Look, he's got the mumps. |
00:57:50 |
Give me it. |
00:58:03 |
Ain't deaf over there. |
00:58:13 |
Bring that back! |
00:58:37 |
Signal: 85, 29, 78. Hup! |
00:58:51 |
Come on, boys. |
00:58:54 |
Jumping anaconda! |
00:58:58 |
Yes, I'm a doctor. |
00:59:10 |
Come back for me in five minutes. |
00:59:16 |
Fancy seeing you here. |
00:59:29 |
Why weren't you in the last scrimmage? |
00:59:31 |
I'm sitting this one out. |
00:59:34 |
You know another way to smoke it? |
00:59:40 |
Don't look now, |
00:59:44 |
Up there with the janitor's wife. |
00:59:47 |
Here, have a cigar. |
00:59:52 |
Signal. |
00:59:54 |
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, |
01:00:12 |
Have you got it, boys? |
01:00:18 |
Hey, bring that ball in here. |
01:00:33 |
There goes the ball. |
01:00:40 |
Go on, Pinky. Make a home run. |
01:00:51 |
Gee, Pinky, you made a touchdown. |
01:01:22 |
I forgot your phone number. |
01:01:28 |
Here it is. Come on, |
01:01:30 |
get off that ball. |
01:01:41 |
Signal: Uno, duo, tre, vendi, |
01:02:01 |
Nice work, Pinky. |
01:02:09 |
Signal: Hi diddle diddle, |
01:02:12 |
this time I think |
01:02:27 |
Hey, you're running the wrong way. |
01:02:58 |
We are gathered together here to join |
01:03:06 |
Do you take this man to be |